Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ Third Labor (Forward to the past) ❯ Scrambled Identities ( Chapter 7 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Third Labor, chapter 7
"Scrambled Identities?"
well, heck it *is* supposed to be an SI after all...
Disclaimer: [Xover][SI][Ranma][Sailor Moon][Sabre Marionette J][OAI][etc]

---------

The Pheonix Mage awoke and immediately summed up his situation in one word: "Mmmrrrrff?!"

"Don't worry, Jay-chan!" Mina made a muscle gesture. Jared idly wondered where she had gotten
the nurse's outfit from. "You'll feel better soon with NURSE MINA on the job!"

Situational analysis: That battle and particularly the amount of energy he'd put into that last spell
had reduced his capabilities to near invalid status. Maybe he'd overdone it a little, just a little mind
you. Spell points were zilch. Silver Millenium abilities: drained to near nothing. Magical items -
temporarily offline. Chi level- barely enough to keep him from slipping into a coma. Wrapped in
bandages - not unexpected with Nurse Mina. Mina Lovejoy tended to have far more enthusiasm
than talent in such endeavors. Or was this the marionette?

If it had been anywhere near him at the time, he'd used it. It had been a TOUGH fight, and his
opponent had been tougher than the average duke of hell. At least the ones he'd remembered
fighting. Any resource he could tap into had been put into that last attack. His eyes went to the
side.

Belldandy was sleeping, which meant exhaustion, which meant that she had been the one to get
Shan to where she could cross dimensions and assist him. He'd have to thank her later.

Shan was sleeping, which also meant exhaustion, which wasn't surprising. She'd never gone to
Super Sailorjin mode before, much less Sailorjin II. Once she had done a new technique, she'd be
able to get the energy cost down but the first time ended up draining her pretty badly.

Jared immediately tried to free himself. Not that he didn't appreciate Mina's intentions, no not at
all. It was her execution of those intentions he found worrisome. "Mrfffg?!"

"Oh, they're all helping with the refugees." Mina shrugged as she filled a hypodermic. "I *think*
this is the stuff Ami said to use. Anyway, they're organizing the refugees into camps - and there's
just a *lot* of medical problems they're working on. We're fleeing ahead of the main forces, of
course. Though that girl Makoto is still spoiling for a fight. But don't worry, they left me and
Scarlet and a lot of others who're taking care of you!"

Looking at the horse needle in Mina's enthusiastic but inept hands, Jared suppressed a whimper.
Torture by goblins didn't seem so bad.

"Okay, Jay-chan! Time for your medicine! Jay-chan? Where'd you go?" Mina scratched her head.
That's funny. He had been lying there a second ago.

It was here that Jared learned the usefulness of many of the Anything Goes techniques, neglected
previously as he'd never been much of a villain, vagabond, or fugitive. As he clung to the ceiling
of their large tent, in agony and terror, he learned many of the fundamental secrets of pushing
yourself beyond all human limits because otherwise you'd be dead.

~Odd, so *that* explained some of Genma and Happosai's training techniques. You really *can't*
learn this advanced stuff without your life being in danger from forces beyond your control.~

His fingers slipped a few inches on the slick fabric, and he nearly fell on Mina's head. She was
peering around worriedly, checking under sheets and in the other beds.

Creeping down silently, he went in and hid himself in a place she'd already looked. Mina
immediately turned about and swept the blanket off from him, revealing the bound-up mage
desperately trying to pretend that he was Belldandy's pillow.

"Aha! Don't forget, Jay-chan, you used the trick of hiding where I'd already looked the last time I
wanted you to judge our bathing suit competition!"

Whimper. ~You know, when Happosai endangers the lives of others he at least uses the
opportunity to do the things he enjoys as the way of getting the masses properly enraged. Genma
too, for that matter. No *wonder* Soun's daughters didn't learn much of anything from him.~

The needle came lowering down.

A quick panda sign got whipped out. [Say, isn't that the Three Lights over there?]

"Who? Oh come on, Jay-chan. It's just a little vitamin shot." Mina waved the bulky syringe.

As this was the sort of needle you used in veterinary medicine, Jared was considering options. [Oh
no! Look, it's Akane!]

"Good try, Jay-chan, now just take your medicine!"

"Hi! Oh my!"

Mina whirled to confront the intruder and quickly realized that it was Scarlet, not Akane the
Hentai.

By the time she'd turned around, Jared had discovered his monk abilities of Run Very Fast and
Move Silently were still intact.

--------

Elsewhere:

The Binding wasn't intelligent per se, but it was developing one as it grew more complex. It had
originally been a Wish granted by an immensely powerful being and had functioned much like a
computer program, but one that could learn and adapt in the course of performing its duty.
Naturally it wanted to do this in the most efficient manner.

So, upon Grey's death, it had been resurrecting him but imposing the only changes it could within
its programming limitations: physical. Because heavily armored cyborgs tended to last longer, it
generally went with those forms.

An errant piece of data, and continued influence from the Discord curse, caused the program to
evaluate and respond by shifting the Host in another approach. As cyborgs were not lasting so
long, and the memories were sufficient to cause a reset, something to minimize danger would be
appropriate.

--------

Grey came up coughing water. That had been difficult. It was all he could do to keep his mind
intact through all that. Without the meditation techniques of Frostbite it would have been
impossible to go through the experience. Something odd with the Binding though, in that instead
of rebuilding him, it was relocating him.

As the coughing fit passed, a few details began to penetrate. A furo, and a familiar one. The
Tendo house. Grey pulled himself out of the water, a nasty feeling settling into the pit of his
stomach. Female. He'd been female a few times. Never enjoyed it. It was like wearing wool or
something, it was just uncomfortable. It wasn't him.

So, a quick splash of hot water and...

Nothing. Grey frowned. ~Okay. Don't panic. i've been a girl before. Not my cup of tea, but at
least i'm not crippled, seem to be in good shape (wince) and... that was a heck of a lot of water i
just coughed up. Oh man, i got inserted into a dead person! Long hair so it isn't Nabiki. Okay, i
can deal with being Kasumi. Weird, but i can deal with it. i like cooking anyway, though those
Japanese dishes are *not* an option. Or... Ugh. What if i'm KIMIKO?! Other than Soun's wife is
gonna be frigid and not fulfill some of her wifely duties?~

Grey nodded. ~That might be it. i've seen timelines where she died of cancer, or an illness, or
miscarrying another child, or protecting her house from a burglar. In this one she drowned.
Hmmm. This might be fun, raising the Tendo kids and solving a lot of problems. i've had brief
experiences raising kids, mainly when the Senshi were turned into babies. Have to do some
research...~

Grey unsteadily supported herself, going out into the dressing room, looking into a mirror...

and screaming in sheer naked (literally) horror!

----------

Third Labor timeline:

Jared fled. He was exhausted otherwise he'd have been much better at it. Following him was a
pack of would-be nurses. Truly, the path to hell had good intentions involved.

Nurse Mina was concerning. Scarlet as a would-be angel of mercy was alarming. The Dirty Pa...
Lovely Angels dressed as miniskirted nurses was downright frightening!

And some of the others who were trying to be Florence Nightingale (or Major Hotlips Hoolihan)
and nurse him back to health were WORSE!

The marionette version of Lina Inverse was strange and hadn't gotten off a spell right yet.
Inexperience, he expected. Hephaestus had modified a marionette into a sorceress (twice in fact)
and Bast had seen the Dirty Pair and had supplied...

Jared could have kicked himself. He tended to rely on magic and high powered attacks. He still
had those PokeBalls! "MUGHI! I choose you!"

"Bwaaa?!" Something very much like a mutant cat appeared out of the thrown PokeBall.
"Murfff?"

Jared flipped onto the cat-things back. "Full speed. THATAWAY!"

"Mugghhiiii!" The Lovely Angels went into full-blown Cute Mode. "Over here!"

"Eeeep!" Jared leapt off of Mughi as the cat changed course. Okay, maybe that hadn't been his
best idea.

Rolling on the grass, he pulled out a substitute mount. "ROSHI! I choose you!"

Mink stepped out of the crowd of nurses and snorted flame. Jared sent a hesitant glance to see the
semi-pterodactyl shaking its head at him vigorously. "Big help you are."

"Griffin?" He tried desperately, calling forth a golden furred lion and eagle hybrid.

"Just wing it, would you Kei?" One of the Lovely Angels asked of the other, as the latter pulled
out her incredibly powerful laser pistol.

"Pegasus?" He tried his next to last PokeBall of that day, only to have the equine immediately
subject itself to the dazing caresses of a dozen horse-crazed teenage girls. ~I am beginning to
think I am losing the war against cute.~

The depleted Mage took a step back as the crowd of would-be nurses stepped forward. No
magic, no... Hey! He was a druid of surpassing level! He could call on elementals without using
spells or anything! Just summon them because they liked and trusted him so much! The badly
drained spellcaster knelt and put his hand on the ground. "EARTH!"

A huge earth elemental of surpassing size and power loomed halfway up out of the soil's
embracing grip, took one look at the advancing crowd of nurses and help up a sign. "Sorry. I like
and trust you but those girls *scare* me."

Situation Analysis: I am about to be killed by the girls who love me most. Mina has a syringe that
compares to medicine the same way the Spanish Inquisition compares to asking the time of day.
I'm immune to normal weapons, but then so is she from what I've done to her and thus she can
hurt me even with mundane objects, the energy of her enchantment equalling mine. Luckily, I'm
immune to poison (three ways) and disease (two ways), so *maybe* it would be best just to
subject myself to their efforts and live through it, rather than injure myself trying more to escape
it.

At that moment Naga the White Serpent exited the tent, having changed her usual black,
barely-adequate-and-not-quite-that micro bikini for a white one of the same style and added a
nurses cap to the top. She began her crazy noblewoman laugh and twirled a pair of handcuffs.
"Well, if our patient is reluctant maybe we had better restrain him, no?"

Kodachi stepped up to her side, dressed demurely (which meant without a doubt that she was
wearing something kinky underneath and just waiting for a moment to dramatically swep this off)
in a white nurses gown and snapping on a latex glove that went clear to her elbow.

Jared sweatdropped.

The Akane (non hentai) marionette type exited the tent bearing a tray full of steaming filth. "Hey
everyone! I cooked breakfast for our patient."

Acting without hesitation, Jared snapped the next PokeBall off his belt. ~Desperate times called
for desperate measures.~ "Mara! I choose you!! Get me out of here!" That required a little extra
thought. "Umm, nothing evil. I couldn't handle it just now, and um, try to keep me on this planet,
just away from them. Okay?"

---------

Kasumi was the first one into the bathroom, having heard the wailing of a lost soul. "What's
wrong, Akane?"

The blackhaired girl in the bathroom pointed shakily at the mirror. "That... i... it... horrible. Horrible. It's... a nightmare. It's got to be."

Kasumi looked into the mirror but couldn't see it. "What is it, Akane? Did you see something?"

"i... Kasumi! It's..." Akane shuddered.

Kasumi was shocked. Her tough little sister was crying and looked decidedly ill. "There, there,
Akane..." Kasumi noted that Akane flinched at the sound of her own name. How odd. "Whatever
it is, I'm sure it'll be all right."

Akane glanced again at the mirror and shuddered. "Somehow i doubt that, Kasumi."

---------

Asgard:

"AAaaaaaaaaaaa!" Celeste said, summing up the situation quite well.

"What's wrong?" Belle was working with the log system and hadn't noticed anything particularly
wrong as of yet.

"Grey's dead in two timelines. His android girlfriends have just dug themselves in and are
preparing to shut themselves down. Terratwo is about to go to outright war, and the Pheonix
Mage is... well he's not in Terratwo anymore." Celeste started checking files. "Where's the Third Labor timeline, is he still there?!"

"It'll be awhile before we rebuild datalinks," Belle remarked. "Trying to track the Pheonix Mage is difficult at best. Though that call from Urd tells me where he *was* at least."

---------

Another universe entirely:

"Okay, I take it this family meeting is what to do about Akane," Nabiki flopped down into her
chair. "She tried to hang herself from the stairway yesterday. Lousy job of it, didn't know enough not to use stretch pantyhose."

"She tried sticking her head in the oven the day before that. Oh, that was in the morning. In the evening she'd recovered enough to go lie down in the street." Kasumi was fretting. Nice girls didn't repeatedly try to commit suicide.

Nabiki held up a hand. "Waitaminute, isn't the waterheater gas and the stove electric? And we
don't get any traffic around here normally."

"Well, Mrs Yamani *did* manage to run over her with a bicycle, but it wasn't quite the effect
Akane was trying for." Kasumi continued to fret. "Oh dear. Do you have any idea why she's doing
it?"

"And at school she threw herself from the roof. TWICE. The first time she landed on Kuno.
Akane also tried to find the family cermonial tanto. I've hidden it of course." Nabiki shrugged. "Maybe the stress of school with Kuno's challenge just got to her."

"Kasumi! Nabiki! I can't believe my little girl would even consider such a thing," Soun drew as
much stoic dignity about himself as he could.

Akane stuck her head in the doorway. "Kasumi? Where are all your knives? i've been all over the
kitchen and i can't find any."

"They're... out to be sharpened! Yes, that's it." Kasumi was sending little sweatdrops everywhere.

"Oh..." Akane looked disappointed. "Well, i'll be in my room if anyone wants me."

Akane trudged up the stairs while three family members watched her.

"Kasumi, have you removed all sharp edges from her room?"

"Yes, Nabiki." Kasumi sighed. "What are we going to do?"

"Oh my," said Soun.

----------

Third Labor timeline:

Mara (aka Marller) was OUT of that damn PokeBall! Finally. She'd been in there since halfway
through the Second Labor!

His wish had been clear, however, and she was bound by that damn sphere herself. The PokeBall
was one of several "knock offs" developed by Raphael that used magic instead of some alien
technology. Among the alterations was a Compulsion To Obey. This rankled but Mara didn't see a
choice but going along with it for now. Though being a Demon First Class, she also *had* to
twist it. The planet was Earth. There were a LOT of Earths. She had to go with him (he was still
holding that damn PokeBall and she could feel her connection to the damn thing still) which
meant a hostile environment version of Earth was out of the question. And he'd said nothing Evil
which precluded a lot of other possibilities.

Which meant... Mara sent her consciousness out to the nearest clusters of stable lines that had
Earths...

"Toriohime! I choose you!" (poof!) "Windy, return to your power contained!" (poof!)
"A-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-TA!" (poof!) "Anpanman, you're here!" (poof & shudder) "Saint Tail! Stop
right there!" (poof!) "You blockhead!" (poof!)

Ah, Mara snapped her fingers. PERFECT!

----------

Nerima, a Ranma/Akumakun timeline:

"Akane? May I come in?"

"Uhm, sure, Kasumi."

Kasumi entered her youngest sister's bedroom and immediately started cataloging the changes. It
was almost as if Akane was divesting herself of as many female influences as possible. The room
looked spartan compared to Akane's usual clutter. Akane herself was in a lotus position on the
floor. "Errrr. Akane. I don't know how to put this..."

"What is it, Kasumi?" Akane looked up at her big sister for a moment.

"Akane, I understand that you were injured at school today." Kasumi began fidgeting again, not
sure how she could handle any of this.

"Yeah. Kuno. What a wimp. Freaked at the sight of a little blood." Akane shrugged, then winced
and her hand shot towards her ribcage.

"Nabiki said that you let Kuno-san hit you, that you impaled yourself on his blade stating that the
only way he could have you was in death." Kasumi winced. Nabiki's description had been quite
graphic.

"Yeah. Geez, you should have seen him. Damn near went into catatonia. i tried to get him to
complete the second thrust but he was MOST uncooperative." Akane shook her head.

Kasumi nodded at the confirmation. From what Nabiki had said, Tatewaki Kuno was likely still
curled up in a ball and mouthing denials. "Akane, I'm... sorry."

Akane stared at KASUMI crying. "Oh geez. Don't do that. What have you got to be sorry
about?"

"But I've obviously failed to raise you or Nabiki well. I've failed Mother's trust. Nabiki is just a
greedy skinflint with a need to prove her intellectual edge at the cost of others, while you're a
violent maniac who's trying to kill herself!"

Nabiki, listening at the wall, frowned at this summation of herself.

"Oh, don't say that, Kasumi. You did everything you could but you were just a kid yourself."
Akane looked at the tears for a moment more. "Well, i don't like the idea of suicide but living
*this* life is just unbearable. Please don't cry. Kasumi... if i could do something for you, i
would..."

"Promise me..."

Akane blinked. "Promise you what?"

"If you care at all for me or Nabiki, for our family, PROMISE me you won't go killing yourself."
Kasumi stared tearfully at her little squirming sister. "Promise me, or... I'll join you!" ~Please
please don't call my bluff.~

"WHAT?! THAT'S CRAZY!"

"It's my failure and my responsibility," argued Kasumi.

Akane stared for a moment then mumbled something under her breath.

"What was that, Akane?"

"All right, already. i promise that i won't intentionally kill myself." Akane's head lowered. ~Damn,
i seem to have gotten Ranma's vulnerability to crying women.~

Nabiki silently applauded Kasumi. She hadn't mentioned some of the things that had frightened off
the horde of hentai at school. One of whom had glomped Akane only to find she was in the
process of pouring gasoline over herself.

The school was scared. Heck, KUNO was scared. Glomp or hit on her, and poom - off she'd go
to end it all. She was quite obviously not taking care of herself, no makeup, it looked like she'd
stopped trying to brush or clean her hair, had rings under her eyes and a tired/depressed air about
her. And then there had been Daisuke. Daisuke had groped her, figuring Akane was too far gone
to care. She had reached down, grabbed his nuts, and had then... Nope. NOBODY wanted to date
Akane anymore.

The paramedics had packed everything in ice, and they'd been able to reattach his... and the
doctors said that there was a good chance he'd regain sensation!

Nabiki had to admit that watching Kuno squirm on hearing the details, well, *that* part had been
fun. Kuno now looked on Akane with fear. And if Nabiki enjoyed twisting the knife on a few
people, pointing out that it was *their* actions that had caused her little sister to be changed from
the cute tomboy to someone who didn't care if she (or anyone accosting her) lived and would
prefer not making it through another day, well that was just Nabiki's fun.

Though it had taken today's events to break through the usual denials from Kuno. He had had
*Akane's* blood on his hands, literally.

Yuka and Sayuri were afraid to come anywhere near the friend. Akane just didn't seem like the
same person.

---------

An SMJ Timeline:

Everyone watched the girl in the strange clothing nervously.

She walked in an odd manner around the smurf on the floor, eyeing him critically, before nodding.
"Yup. I can fix this. You want to be human, right?"

"Yes! Yes! No more singing at night and unaccountable cravings for whatever a 'smurfberry' is.
No more being stepped on or chased by cats. No more being a deformed blue munchkin!"

"Sounds like a yes to me." The woman raised slender limbs the color of dark chocolate over her
head, and a glow gathered between her hands.
"Building blocks of life now heed,
Double helix hear me plead,
Change this one who's smurf in form,
To human variable now conform!"

Ieyasu looked up from where he was kneeling. "I'm...."

"Human." Edema nodded. "Ah well, we can't all have the grace and innate beauty of a dark elf,
can we? Oh ho ho ho ho ho. Errr. Sorry about that. I just watched a 'Slayers' marathon."

"How can I repay you? That..." Ieyasu wasn't sure what to say.

"Forgive him, he's a bright elf. They always think they know better than everyone else what's
good for everyone else." Edema shrugged. "Not that most dark elves are any better. I left my
homeland 'cause I couldn't stomach that sort of thing. Hoighty toity light elves, nasty vicious dark
elves. Silly really. Two sides of the same coin and pride is the foundation of both."

"ahhhh..." None of those present were quite sure what to make of this.

"Oh, is this your attempt to rebuild Banana?" Edema crossed to the table.

"Well... that is..." Gennai began to get nervous now.

"Hey, just because I'm an archmage who grew up in a psuedo-medieval setting doesn't mean I
can't ask questions. I asked Celeste. Nice girl, if she'd get over the weird clothes fetish and relax a
little."

"Weird clothes?" Gennai looked at the stiletto heeled calf length boots, the green and gold
clothing that didn't hide much of the girl's dark skin, and the tattoo on her left arm depicting the
silhoutte of a woman dancing. He spent a moment wondering what this woman(?} considered odd
clothing.

Edema saw him stare and tapped the tattoo. "My patron. The Dancer, the Moonsword. I'd say the
elven name but you humans never pronounce it right. Now let's see. You've got partial brain tapes
and you use these to simulate engram patterns, right? Giving the android partial memories of the
original Grey. Except that it didn't work too well with the second Ginseng, did it?"

Nobody refuted that.

"Let *me* try," suggested Edema.
"Gather here the spirit trace,
To this golem give embrace,
a quickening of mind and heart,
reborn now within this part!"

Ginseng3 gasped and spasmed, then seemed to go to sleep.

"That might do it," suggested Edema. "Now for how you're going to pay me back."

The nervous tension in the room grew palpable.

"You're going to take a DNA sample from me," said Edema, throwing her hair back and smirking.
"Because if that Mage-boy comes back here and finds a lot of half-drow babies it's gonna put a
major torque in his shorts!"

"But we don't want trouble..." The human again Ieyasu said. If it meant giving up his humanity
again to safeguard his people he'd do it in a heartbeat. He'd been willing to die to bring back
human women and rescue Lorelei. Having done it before, he'd do it again.

"Nah, he'll probably just cast a spell to change 'em into half bright-elves, or whatever they call
them in his neck of the woods." Edema shrugged. "And don't tell me you couldn't use the genetic
diversity. Six guys and one woman don't exactly fill your genetic cup to the brim. Especially when
NONE of you were genetic experts."

"Well, that's true." Ieyasu nodded.

"What do you mean?" Otaru asked, confused. But then he'd been lost early into all of this.

"None of the six guys who landed on Terratwo was an expert at genetic engineering." Edema
gave a "what can I say" gesture. "The six guys were an 'away team' - a geologist, a biologist, a
botanist, an engineer who happened to be a robotics expert, a security guard/communications
officer, and a pilot. The ship's computer went nuts before the genetics experts or anyone else was
ready to leave, just the scout team that was supposed to decide where to put the colony.
Otherwise they'd have been able to take the Xs from two guys and try to make a woman."

"We did. But in those days the machines were breaking down and it would be a slow road to
rebuild our technology to that level. We ended up using the mongrelizing clone process that was
originally intended for taking a couple of animals and recreating enough of them to make a viable
species. The clone banks and genetic samples were all on the shuttle, otherwise we would never
have made it past that first generation." Ieyasu sighed. "It was a hard time and tempers frayed,
causing our split from a single colony to the six countries we have today."

"True. Now your timeline has seperated enough for me to do this, mind you - once I leave your
land I won't return. You'll never see me again." Edema paused to smile openly. "Except perhaps in
the likeness of the occasional darkskinned whitehaired child."

--------

Elsewhere:

The note read:

"Tendo,
Boy got injured while training. Dropping him off while I attend to other business. Proceed with
Plan.
Saotome."

Soun glanced down at the heavily bandaged boy sleeping peacefully on his front porch and began
to cry tears of happiness. Why, they weren't due to arrive for weeks yet! And Genma's
handwriting had improved immensely! He tiptoed away from the darkhaired boy so as not to
wake him and give him an early start, I mean startle him needlessly, and went to find his
daughters.

"Kasumi?" He looked to find the kitchen empty, ingredients left in haste. Kasumi left a mess in the kitchen? Was the Apocalypse coming? Plodding up the stairs he opened the door to Nabiki's
room. "Nabiki?"

His middle daughter emerged from her sleep looking terrible. Eyes closed she muttered. "It's five o' clock in the morning. Couldn't it wait, Daddy?"

"Have you seen Kasumi or Akane out?" He should've known it was a ridiculous question, but
Nabiki often answered them anyway.

She looked out of her window, not stirring from her bed. Then her eyes grew slightly larger and
she rushed over to the window, followed by her father. "So *that's* what she wanted the extra
bricks and boards for. I thought she was going to go back to martial arts practice with them."

Soun looked out the window and became instantly terrified, turning himself about and rushing
downstairs. Nabiki merely opened the window and leaned out, calling down. "Akane, I thought
you'd promised not to *do* that anymore?"

Akane glanced up from where she was losing the struggle with Kasumi for possession of the rope.
"Oh, hi Nabiki. No, This isn't covered under the promise at all."

Nabiki took in the scaffold and trap door, with newly painted sign which proclaimed "Hang the
Psycho-bitch, only 5,000 yen (payable to Nabiki)."

"This most certainly *is* covered under your promise!" Kasumi objected, yanking away the rope
her kid sister had been trying to tie into a noose. "You said that you wouldn't ever kill yourself."

Akane pointed to the lever, almost six feet away from the trapdoor. "Do you think i'm pulling that by myself? No, i was just helping Nabiki out with her money-hungry schemes. This way i'm out of the picture and make Nabiki and someone else happy! i figure i want to die and if someone wants to pay for the privilege of killing me i *wouldn't* be doing the dirty deed myself."

Nabiki felt oddly used and soiled by that statement. Sure she liked money, but to be used as her sister's excuse just felt... wrong. Did Akane really see her like that? The thought made Nabiki sick. This being the third time in the past week that Akane had made a reference to this image of her shorthaired sister, and the apparent sincerity in each case, had been giving Nabiki some painful soul searching. "Akane! How could you?"

Akane blinked with a sincerely puzzled expression. "Was it too cheap?"

"AKANE!!" Soun bellowed, exploding out from the lower level of the house, enveloping her in a
restraining hug and washing her hair with his tears. "PLEASE! Don't kill yourself. You have to
think of the future of the school!" sob. "And just as things were about to go so well for us."

"Screw the school. Has the Anything Goes made *one* person happy? Has it ever saved a life or
served a greater purpose! The Anything Goes Style was created by a perverted little monster for
the purpose of stealing underwear!" Akane protested from within the glomp. "If you want the
school to continue TEACH STUDENTS!"

"B-b-but..." Soun was beginning to register Akane's words.

"But what do you expect of a style developed by HAPPOSAI?!"

Soun shrank back as if a hot iron had been applied. "No! Don't say that name!"

Akane frowned. "Well, if you're going to be THAT unreasonable, there's only one avenue left
open to me..."

A little later, with a moan, a young man wandered over to the source of the shouting. Blearily, the youth took in the sight of Soun holding a squirming Akane helpless, Nabiki in her pajamas sitting on the scaffold steps, Kasumi standing by with a partially tied noose, and very deliberately read the sign. Then he looked back up, holding his head to reduce the pain. "Wow, Nabiki! What blackmail material did you get over everyone *this* time? Only don't you think that's a little cheap? I mean you'll only get to hang her once, don't you think you could get more for it?"

Nabiki's iron control faded and her lips trembled. Unfortunately, at that moment Kasumi chose to speak almost the exact words she was thinking. "Wow, Nabiki, even total strangers believe you are capable of doing this for money."

"Or spite." The former redhead interjected, searching through his pockets. "Who knows? Akane
might have snubbed her sister at a party or something. I'm sorry, I don't have the 5,000 yen on me at the moment..."

Nabiki closed her eyes and shuddered, while Soun and Akane ceased struggling to regard the boy.

Rather too out of it to notice the response he got, the boy went on. "But really, don't you even want to cover funeral expenses? Oh, I forgot, you'll probably have a 'dismember the body' party or something and charge admission, then sell the remains by the pound. Never let a resource go to waste, that's Nabiki."

Soun began to wail about his daughter having arranged all of this to make money.

The Ranma-lookalike watched in puzzlement as the middle Tendo broke out bawling and ran into
the house. "Was it something I said?" He asked, honestly puzzled in his hazy confusion why she
would act like that.

Then again, in his state of being newly on the recovery from being nine-tenths dead himself, the harshness of his own words escaped him. At this point he didn't even realize that he was disguised as Ranma Saotome. Yawning, the bandaged youth wandered over and took Kasumi by the hand, guided her down to the grass, curled up around her and went back to sleep.

Kasumi was sitting there stiffly, blinking her tumbled brains out.

Soun began the ever-so-classic wail about the houses about to be joined.

Akane found herself free to go, and began to wonder what to do with herself. Then she noted the
boy was wearing a sword and that it was Ranma. Sword wielding Ranma? How odd. Not that she
hadn't seen stranger things.

Asleep with his head in her lap, the boy mumbled something that began with "'sumi-chan..."


----------

RIFTS Earth:

Apple hesitated. "So... Master has a native version?"

The girl leaned back against the wall and seemed to contemplate the ceiling. "He and thee have
bound thy essences twice. And like he, thou dost continue to gather fragments of thyself that be
scattered through the timelines."

"What exactly is your tie to Master," Grape asked, "you... aren't a fiancee, are you?"

"Bragi's balls, child, NO. I've already got enough on mine plate. And before thee ask, NOT that
fellow." She shook her head. "What his local Analogue be is what they call a techno-wizard.
When the Wanderer doth return, he shall merge with the local and add to the gestalt."

"Then Master will return?" Honey asked of the stranger.

"Aye," said the woman, holding up a finger. "First the Life Line spell. Cast once when thy current
versions first did meet, then renewed by thee in the next timeline. It is this which, more than
anything else, marks you as incompatible with your Senshi identities. Sworn to someone other
than thy princess, after all, is not in keeping with those identities. Seek thy hearts, do you not see
the words emblazoned within? Thou art sworn to serve him as thy liege."

The marionette identities had little problem with this. Some of the others did.

"Second," the woman said, holding up a second finger. "The ties were reborn when the cat did his
own deal with thee. Merge with thy other selves in the land of the Pheonix Mage, or thy lives and
his would be forever bound together."

A few aspects remembered that, for others this was news to them.

"Third," the woman added a third finger to the two she held up. "Thee may be interested to see
what the local aspect of this Grey is doing... and who he be with." Fleece grinned. This would
cement the deal for sure. If only her translator was working right.

----------

McAngus Village, near the ruins of Wickenburg in Arizona, RIFTS Earth.

"Suzi, did you feel that?" The man in Urban Warrior armor backed up slightly and pulled a rod off
his belt.

The woman with long green hair nodded but remained silent.

The rod had a crystalline top which rotated with an odd noise. "C'mon, let's get back to Quartzite.
Something's scanning for us."

-----------

"Please, please, kill me! i'm an uncute brute, i'm a vicious violent thug, the world will be a better
place without me!"

Jared stared at Akane for a moment, then looked around to see if Rod Serling was waiting in the
wings or something. "Uhm..."

"PLEASE KILL ME! i don't deserve to live! i'm a horrid person. i can't cook, i'm manipulative
and vain and evil!"

Jared starts backing up, *really* wishing he could cast a few spells right now. Detect Lie, Detect
Evil, Detect Invisible... "Wait a minute, errrr, something isn't right here."

Akane pulls out a mallet. "C'mon. i'm armed now and attacking! You can do it! Just one quick
thrust and you can claim it was self defense."

Jared's sword was out and lopping the top of the mallet off in a single quick stroke. Which
immediately came down on Akane's head and knocked her out.

"What the heck?!" Jared stared puzzled as Akane recovered from her faint. "Why? How? What?!"

Akane frowned and tried another tack. "What, are you a coward then? Not much of a man at all
are you?!"

Jared gripped the sword a bit tighter until he noticed Akane's grin and that she was watching the
sword. She... genuinely wanted him to kill her?

Seeing him hesitate, Akane tried some more. "Coward! Little girl! Instead of doing something
heroic like saving the world from an insidious cancerous evil, you choose not to face your
responsibilities. Are you TRYING to be like your Oyaji!"

*CLANK!*

Jared lowered the blade, having used the flat to knock Akane out again. "This has just gone
beyond weird into the realm of ludicrous. I must have gotten hurt worse than I thought."

He pulled out a PokeBall. "Mara! I choose you!"

"Yes!" The gloating demoness materialized in a swirl, then turned sultry eyes on the mage.
"Anything I can do for you, lover boy?"

He immediately grew suspicious. "Oh, yeah. I should have realized. Tempting me to break my
marriage vows would be evil, and of particular satisfaction to *you* because of how much it
would hurt Belldandy. No thank you."

Mara acquired the typical 'what a wonderful idea' expression.

Jared waved the thought away, not having noticed. "No, I was going to ask. What did you do to
me, where am I, and why is Akane acting less evil this time? I believe I've actually seen remorse in
those eyes and self-loathing, both of which she's normally too impenetrably proud to feel." He
considered thoughtfully. 'Though if she *were* to feel them she's got enough evil deeds stacked
up to feel potential remorse over that could explain why she'd be acting like this."

He shook his head. "I've been around Scarlet too long. It used to be a reflex action: see Akane,
kill Akane. As natural as breathing. But something's gone wrong here." He regarded the demoness
with a wary eye. "So what is it?"

"Well, for one thing," Mara said thoughtfully, producing a mirror.

Jared frowned, glanced into it, then squeaked. "WHAT?! What's the meaning of this?"

Mara waggled a finger. "You're hiding, remember. This was the nearest timeline that didn't have
evil dominating, habitable, and where my meager abilities could hide you. And it's a pretty damn
good disguise, if I say so myself. With the amount of manna I've got right now, you should be
grateful."

"So you made me look like *Ranma*?!" Jared frowned then gave it up with a sigh.

"Hey, it's difficult to see anything from the bottom of stuffspace but I overheard enough that
you're familiar with the role." Mara shrugged. "Until I find a way to get that PokeBall away from
you, I'm stuck with you."

"Mara, return," Jared/Ranma said, holding the PokeBall up and waiting until the demon was
sucked inside. Actually, this wasn't bad. He might be able to make it work. Now if he could just
figure out what the heck he'd walked into...

-----------

Jared sat back in the tub, confused by the events of the day.

*SHHOOOSH!*

Jared slowly brought his head up to see Akane standing in the doorway. He was ready for it. He
knew the scene by heart.

"Oh sorry. i didn't know it was in use. My apologies." Akane bowed and closed the door. There
came the rustle of clothes being put back on and the outer door opening and closing.

Jared realized his jaw was hanging down so far that he was taking in water. That had been...

Akane making a mistake. Taking responsibility for it. And apologizing.

"Arrggghhhhhh! How OOC can you get?!" Jared asked the ceiling, almost expecting a reply.

-----------

Jared got up with the sunrise, feeling better, and realized someone was practicing katas below in
the yard. Akane. Or whatever that smiling THING was.

"Hey, brother-in-law!" Akane called out, apparently seeing Jared at the same time. "Wanna spar?"

Jared nodded, THIS was at least in the usual script. Then realized he had just agreed to the
sparring match. "Oh my."

"Don't worry, Kasumi," Akane called into the house, "i won't rough up your fiance!"

"Confident, are you?" Jared said, taking a stance. Then frowning. Akane's center and breathing
didn't match the profile he was expecting. Not in his class. Not NEARLY in his class. But
sufficiently good that she would have given Ryoga Hibiki a hard time. Both of the combatants
noted the presence of two girls and an older man watching from the sidelines and dismissed them.
Akane bowed deeply, but her eyes never moved from her opponent.

Jared bowed back, not as deeply, but also not taking his eyes from his opponent. They
simultaneously went into "ready" stances and held position in a psychic duel.

A leaf blew between them.

Akane all but exploded towards Jared, rotating for a flying kick that Jared immediately realized
was feint for an en passant manuever. Jared ducked and rolled, avoiding the grab, and bounced
into his own attack.

"Oh... MY!" Kasumi said as the two fighters blurred into a series of punches, counterpunches,
kicks, blocks, and other manuevers that Kasumi couldn't immediately name.

"Kachuu Tenshin Amaguriken!" Akane announced, throwing twenty five punches a second
towards Ranma.

"Chestnuts Roasting On An Open Fire," said "Ranma", blocking with the same technique and
wondering how the heck Akane had learned AMAZON techniques. Though she was only about a
quarter of as fast as she should be.

"Bakusai Tenken," tried Akane, blowing a huge divot in the ground. Then spitting as she'd had
her mouth open during that and had gotten dirt in her mouth.

Jared backed up. Yes, if he went all out the fight would be over. Yet he was "Ranma" for the
moment and Ranma only fought full out in very rare circumstances. Besides, he was learning more
about this odd Akane, though none of it made any sense.

"Shi... shi... hokodan!" Akane fired off a quick burst of green chi.

Nabiki openly stared. Akane... had gotten good. REALLY good. One could tell that she was
going all out, that Ranma wasn't, but what Akane was doing was still quite impressive.

The two came to a stop. Jared had nearly died recently, and so was somewhat out of breath.
Akane trembled on the edge of exhaustion and panted heavily.

"Not... (pant) bad... (gasp), Ranma." Akane said. "But try this!"

Seeing that Akane was about to try the Grandmaster Blow, and botch it, Jared moved. He leapt
up, landed behind Akane and tapped her in the back of the head.

"I know what you planned," Jared said in a low voice, eyes narrowed. "You planned on our fight
increasing in speed and severity until I accidently killed you."

Akane panted and quietly agreed. "You gonna do it, Ranma?"

"Nice try," mumbled Jared/Ranma.

"Akane?! When did you learn those techniques?" Soun had been rather amazed at the
performance of his youngest. That Genma's son was good was only to be expected.

"Recent developments. This was the first chance i had to try them out like that." Akane made a
gesture towards her opponent, and not an impolite one. "Though Ranma here is *much* better
than I could be. I've never had nearly the sort of focus he has for the Art."

Jared staggered again, surprised anew. Akane was being generous? Humble? Honest?

"So, son, have you decided yet which of my little girls you're going to make happy?" Soun turned
his attention to the most important matter now that Genma's son was conscious and cognizant.

Akane blurted out quickly: "Oh, he wants Kasumi!"

"Huh?!" Again Jared staggered under a scene going completely different from what he expected.

Kasumi and Nabiki blinked.

"Oh yes," Akane said. "Since i promised i wouldn't kill myself, i shall instead shave my head and
become a nun - dedicating myself to a life of privation and suffering in the cause of helping others.
In such a way, perhaps i can make up in some small measure for being such an evil psycho-bitch."

Everyone present sweatdropped. Jared considered facefaulting but he still wasn't completely
recovered from his battle with the demon.

"Besides, Ranma has been horribly abused all his life by his father and to heal him of those
experiences requires a gentle touch. That's Kasumi. Nabiki couldn't be kind and gentle if you paid
her."

"Urk," Nabiki said, leaning over and clutching her chest.

"Kasumi likes to cook, Ranma likes to eat, Kasumi's gentle and thoughtful, Ranma's got a lot of
experience with the Art but not that much with Life." Akane shrugged and smiled playfully.
"Kasumi's beautiful and intelligent, kind and talented. Her strengths compliment Ranma's, instead
of competing with him. It's a good match, don't ya think?"

"WHAT?! How can you join a nunnery?!" Soun focussed on the bit that Akane had hoped would
be overlooked during her recitation of why Kasumi was the best choice. "I forbid it!"

"Well, put that way, it does sound logical," agreed Jared absently.

"Oh my," said Kasumi, blushing prettily. Akane might be a suicidal maniac, but she certainly had
made a good argument.

"No!" Nabiki snuggled against one side. "I can be the kind and nurturing type too!" Besides, after
all these relevations about how people viewed her as a heartless mercenary, Nabiki just wanted
someone to hold her and give some degree of comfort. Unfortunately, the guy wasn't responding.

"Well, son?" Soun asked Jared before turning his attention back to Akane. "Don't think that this is
the end of this conversation, young lady!"

Jared blinked. "I'm sorry. What was the question?"

Soun facefaulted, then did his best Looming Horror look. "Which of my daughters are you going
to marry?"

"You want Kasumi!" Akane suggested. "I mean look at her. Beautiful, graceful, intelligent, a
good cook! Okay, she's a bit shy, tends to be in the background. That's why you're perfect for her!
She needs to get out more, get more excitment into her life, and she's such a caring person that
someone who can care BACK is ideal."

Everyone stared a moment at Akane, who just said "what?!"

Soun was about to speak again when Akane continued. "On the other hand there's Nabiki. A
heartless profiteer with no sense of honor. A flawed soul doomed to loneliness whose dreams of
conquering the business world will have her a Wall Street Privateer by 24, and a has-been eating
out of trashcans by 29." Akane spoke from experience, having witnessed the rise and fall of
Nabiki Tendo a few times. Eventually she fell, her habits by the time of the failed first wedding
between Ranma and Akane having reduced her to a mercenary shell, and being able to trust no
one or nobody, and not being trusted by anyone eventually reducing her to the insane wretch he'd
seen on six different timelines. Not pretty.

As this occurred to her, it also occurred that this might be it- the reason that HIS spirit had been
reincarnated into the body of a recently drowned Akane. Maybe the family got even worse off
without Akane (as hard as that was to believe) so...

"Oddly enough, I can see that happening. Where nobody trusts her, nobody likes her, and she
turns her back on the world itself. Rather like Gollum in the Hobbit..." Jared(Ranma) nodded.

Nabiki twitched a few times. This guy wasn't responding to her hug. Not good. Her family hadn't
noticed. Bad. They were casually discussing her as if she had become some loathsome little
creature to whom profit was the only good. She'd had enough self-doubt and guilt eating away at
her for the past week that she wasn't able to dismiss the concept out of hand. She had some
friends, but they tended to be more like casual acquaintances and colleagues. Henchwomen
perhaps...

"Oh my," Kasumi said, still blushing over Akane's earlier words. "I..."

Jared thought for a moment. "Uhm, Mister Tendo. I'm really tired right now. I haven't nearly
recovered from my injuries. I think I need a quick lie down."

"Oh..." Soun frowned, but the boy *did* look pale. "Okay, son, but by dinner tonight, we'll need
your decision."

---------

Third Labor timeline:

The silver dragon dropped out of the sky and considered the mesa below her. If she understood
right, this particular mountaintop would remain unclaimed for several hundred years. Even when
the Anasazi broke up into their smaller tribes, and the Hopi occupied the three mesas far to the
South, this land would remain clear. Particularly if she took action NOW.

That Pheonix Mage had promised. SHE had not. And it was HER consort- Nebula, Princess
Serenity's father, that was going to need help here.

The dragon shifted into a silver haired girl, who had eschewed her normal gowns for clothing that
was a little more practical in the unhewn wilderness. HER association with the Pheonix Mage had
not been as a wife or lover.

(Well, it had looked likely briefly, then the Mage had found a way to deflect at least one suitor.)

This looked like an ideal place to put a city where allies would abide until called centuries hence.

As a group of Amazon refugees gated in, Queen Serenity summoned power.

---------

Back in the Ranma/Akumakun timeline.

Kasumi was starting to put dinner on the table. "Ranma, what was that you were doing earlier?"

The displaced mage took a moment to recognize that she meant *him*, then spent a moment
fruitlessly churning mental wheels still loose from the overwheming strain he'd put them under
during the fight. In an odd moment of unrelated insight, he discovered this was pretty close to
what Shan must feel absorbing techniques, only she had more practice with it than he did.

He roused himself from the introspective stupor a bit before Kasumi began wondering if she
should repeat her question. "Sorry, 'sumi-chan. What was I doing earlier that drew your
attention?"

She blinked. "The part where you were glowing and floating off the floor."

Nabiki and Soun refocused their attention away from the meal. Jared/Ranma relaxed. ~Whew!~
"Oh, that was nothing. A chi meditation technique I picked up to reharness internal energies. The
glowing comes from a techique called Dragon Chi, where you tie into the natural flow of power in
the world. I use it to divert a portion for rebuilding my reserves, which are pretty badly depleted."
He sniffed at the meal. ~Hmm, smells delicious.~

Kasumi joined the others, kneeling at the table and removing the cover from a steaming rice and
pork dish. Taking his plate to serve him, she asked. "And the levitating?"

The mage had to chuckle. "Um, I learned how to do that studying a Flying Dragon style of kung
fu, and it keeps cropping up at the oddest moments." He sighed, thinking back to his early
pre-saving the world adventuring days. "Once or twice when we've been low I've sat out on a
street corner with a sign 'Will Levitate For Food.' It's worked pretty well. But really, when we've
got some operating cash I FAR prefer to set myself up as a confectioner or a Martial Art
performance cook. Cutting salads while I and the ingredients are both in mid air is impressive, but
it doesn't taste nearly as good as yours."

"Wasn't it Akane who used the chi blast in that sparring match you had?" Nabiki intruded,
determined not to be left out in this conversation. "How was it your reserves got so low?" She
spent a moment on how to insinuate a come on in that question and failed, determining that she
may as well let this one slide to build a 'trustworthy confederate' role which she could work on
and expand. She wasn't out of this by a long shot!

Ranma looked at her, as if surprised to see her (which, in his muddled condition, he actually was
having some difficulty keeping track of some things like that). "Hmm? Oh, no. It wasn't the fight
at all. I'd been killing demons and the last one wouldn't go down without a battle royal. I got him,
but not before he'd destroyed a couple hundred people. Kasumi, can I have some more rice,
please?"

A cold wind blew through the house as all of the others sat like icicles.

Jared was torn. It had been two full days since the battle, and his recovery left much to be desired.
Chi was burbling back, more slowly than he would've liked, but it was coming. Magic potential,
on the other hand, was dribbling in in unsatisfactory amounts. He had some natural abilities
restored, but nothing in the way of spell points yet, and those were important.

He began to consider his 'godly recharge' and wondered if he stole a few kisses if it would be
taken wrong.

----------

The refugees looked over their new cities in wonderment.

Queen Serenity had meant to go forward a mere two hundred years to 411 AD. Instead, the
gateways centered on her had carried the refugees to the North American continent- but in the
year 911 AD instead - seven hundred years after China had fallen to evil.

Other refugees had been culled from other disasters, as not everyone had been able to follow the
signal precisely. When Korea had been besieged and finally crushed by the hordes, the marionette
sorceress Lina had brought a small army of refugees forward. When the divine wind had failed
and Japan had largely been crushed and ransacked by the Chinese, another small army of women
and children had been plucked forth by Deedlit and Pirotesse. When the darkness sent raiding
parties into Russia, others brought a few survivors forward in time.

So it was that nine mountains each had a single village. Each village had its own customs or
language. Each also had something in common.

A pledge, an obligation of honor, a prophesy to be fulfilled.

------------

RIFTS Earth: about 75 miles from New Phoenix

As his wives/marionettes/companions, they had had little trouble going through Grey's things.
That had produced a small amount of gold, among other things, and the group had quickly found
and bought a vehicle capable of taking them to the location on their maps.

They had changed as well, the mergers of their various aspects producing a different being than
the ones who had arrived. Though they were not completely merged mentally or personally.

Rei Hino was Rei Hino. She had gone through two lifetimes as a sometimes-psychic reincarnated
girl of a vanished Moon Kingdom, and once as the Princess Mars *of* that kingdom. Melon had
vanished for the most part, having had only a tiny amount of time aware in that incarnation. She
had become wholly human, and therefore the most vulnerable of any of the travellers. Without a
hensshin pen or other means of transformation, Princess Mars remained an unrealized possibility.

Grape was Hotaru was Saturn, and while she preferred the name Hotaru, was a human seeming
cyborg with the strength and speed and endurance of a Sabre Marionette. So she might *look*
like a thin 13 year old girl, but she could lift the Mountaineer ATV they were riding in despite the
size and mass of the vehicle. She could also use her vibro-halberd to slice and dice with great
effect. Grape hadn't been awake that long, but her programmed personality and its directives
(emphasizing her role as a Protector) were strong. Saturn was strong enough to manifest to some
degree, evidenced by her clothing altering to her seifuku. The sound of Saturn arguing with Grape
was frequently heard as the young girl's voice altered to fit whichever persona was speaking at the
time.

Apple had spent a small amount of time awake, but she had apparently come to an agreement with
Makoto Kino and Sailor Jupiter. Somehow, and she wasn't sure how, the two others were
dormant within her. Apple was still a marionette android, and was still Apple, and the other two
would come out when they were ready. The merger had been "forestalled" as Apple would stay.
The others would have liked to have learned how to do this.

Blueberry aka Princess Mercury aka Ami Mizuno was asleep, had been groggy and ready to fall
over when they'd gotten her to the ATV, and it was anyone's guess how she'd wake up.

Honey had vanished two hours after they'd left the ruin and only Sif's presence had kept anyone
from panicking. When Honey had rejoined the group, she'd added another aspect to her group.
They currently weren't adding their own arguments to Grape's muttering as Rica (Ree) Fukami
was driving the vehicle. Considering that there was no road and they were going around sixty
miles an hour, the "Glitter Boy" pilot was left in the driver's seat in more than one sense.

---------

Jared got up off of the futon, slipping off the Synaptic Teacher. Sakyo had downloaded all of
Lorelei's technical knowledge into a format which his superspy electronics had been busily
translating into a format he could use, and he'd been looking for an opportunity to absorb it.

It convinced him of several things. One was how enormously complicated a maiden circuit
actually was (he rather suspected the reason most failed to work was a call to Yggdrasil's system
for a living soul to inhabit an android body was something Lorelei didn't have the religious
perspective to understand), and the other was a desperate and growing need to understand
MORE of this technology. Dr. Lorelei, while smart, hadn't been the one to develop marionettes to
the level they were now. Also if he was to be going that route (and having as many marionettes
as he did it was only polite and proper manners to know how to maintain and fix them to a greater
extent than he was presently able) but if he was going this route it became an item of concern to
acquire most or all of Geltland's technical advancements before the dissolution of the country's
central authority wiped them all away.

He could think of a dozen uses for their plasma technology just offhand, and it would be handy in
a dozen ways to have technology an electrical storm of whatever intensity wouldn't shut down. It
became a mission priority to acquire them at first possible opportunity.

He became aware of Soun sitting crosslegged next to his bed, flanked by his three daughters.
"Well?" The old man paused to take a deep drag of his cigarette and then dramatically snort
smoke out of his nostrils. "You've had your after dinner nap, I see. And you don't appear to be
lightheaded or confused at the moment." The elder Tendo leaned forward and exhaled smoke next
to Jared's face. "So which of my..."

The old man blinked in surprise to find that he was talking to thin air, and Ranma was hanging out
the window by his toes, gagging from the cigarette smoke. One of the feet released its hold to
raise up a panda sign. [They don't smoke, do they? Because if they do the deal's off.]

Soun looked down at the cigarette hanging out from his face. Kasumi shook her head slightly
while Nabiki held out an ashtray. "Oh, father, father, father..." The Tendo patriarch shrank in on
himself a trifle to hear his eldest daughter's slight rebuke.

Jared pulled himself back in the window, sitting near the sill in an effort to stay clear of the
lingering smoke. ~Once more into the breech.~ "Well..."

"Hang on," Akane said. "Ranma's right 'Daddy' - that *is* an annoying, teeth staining, tumor
causing, smelly, puking, habit of yours. i don't mind dying, but lung cancer's a pretty nasty way to
go. So...
Sylph's wings beat a gentle breeze,
Cool and blow and lightly tease,
Influence foul from the air cleanse,
To help the health begin to mend."

"Clerical Magic?!" If Jared had been flabbergasted by Akane being humble, repentant, and
praising her sister's pluses over her own, this had thrown him into downright astonishment. White
magic? Akane?!

The others noted that Akane's hands had briefly glowed, then a cool breeze wafted through the
house.

Soun sniffed, and recognized the scent of pine needles and fresh tilled earth. It reminded him of
his wife, and of their honeymoon.

Kasumi closed her eyes as she noted the scent of lavender, and of fresh baked bread. The air
seemed purer and more refreshing somehow, the scent of cigarettes banished without a trace.

Nabiki stared at Akane, noting the cool wind that playfully tugged at her clothing and ruffled her
hair, carrying the faint scent of sandalwood soap and the sound of children playing.

All three native Tendos came out of the trance with a start. "AKANE?! WHAT?!"

Akane shrugged. "Hey, i told you, didn't i? i'm going to become a nun and devote myself to
helping the poor and repentant. In this way, i shall make up for the evil that i have done."

Jared nodded. If AKANE were getting clerical spells, that might indicate a profound religious
experience - now that she wasn't trying to kill herself to atone for it, she was following a more
proper path for such things.

Smiling, and wanting to do something in turn, the disguised redhead crossed over to Akane and
tugged open the front of her gi, exposing her sports bra and the ugly wound caused by Kuno's
blade and given minimal attention in the days since then. "I think I can do something about this."
Ignoring that if she could cast 'Cooling Breeze' she could cast 'Cure Light Wounds', Jared laid his
hand over the wound site.

Jared had a chi technique that would do, but instead relied upon an ability gotten as a monk so as
not to tax his recovery. Jared also ignored Akane's startled look going towards heavily annoyed.
He closed his eyes and the hand glowed softly for a few moments. When he removed it the wound
was gone, and he calmly turned his back and crossed back to the window while she again shut the
front of her gi.

Akane's efforts to straighten out her clothing were interrupted by both her sisters leaning over and
yanking it open again, examining the smooth flesh of her ribs where the wound had been, and not
even a scar remained.

"Great," Akane muttered. "First Ranma, now my sisters. Are we gonna sell tickets for *this*
now- come grope Akane before she can 'hie me to a nunnery'?"

Kasumi was blinking madly. Her little sister had been lackadaisical at best about caring for her
injury, and *wouldn't* go to Dr. Tofu about it as she'd asked. Now it was clean and unblemished
flesh, a far cry from the festering condition she'd been concerned about. Kasumi began to look at
Ranma and blinked prodigiously.

Nabiki was recalling in all the gory detail how that blade had went into her sister's chest, and
wasn't having any peace of mind running her hands over where that ugly wound had been. Neither
her eyes nor her fingers were telling her that ghastly hurt was there anymore, and she couldn't
believe it.

Nabiki grew VERY quiet and still as her sister finally yanked her gi shut. A miracle, there was no
other word for it. She had witnessed a miracle take place in her own house. Two if you count
Akane's breeze. Nabiki drew a VERY deep breath and shuddered from her head down to the tips
of her toes, drawing her knees up and hugging them as she glanced sidelong at her kid sister and
potential husband.

It was one thing to be held in low regard, another to be insulted. The evident sincerity of their low
opinion hurt alot. But when both her sister and their house guest who'd been holding those low
opinions start performing miracles, it was time to take a *serious* look at herself, and maybe
consider that it was time to change.

Soun had fallen over backwards when his soon to be future son in law had started undressing his
little girl. He now sat up, having missed the point of the whole thing, and coughed into his hand.
"Congratulations, my boy. So it's to be..."

"NO!!!!!" Both Akane and Ranma shouted simultaneously.

"I'm going to be a nun, dad." Akane reminded, pulling the ties on her gi even tighter.

Ranma produced a certificate. "I'm a certified medical doctor, with credentials in surgery and
related fields. No, I was in a strictly medical capacity when I did that, I assure you. You'll find her
wound amply taken care of."

Kasumi's eyes were attempting to use all of the landscape of her face. "You're a doctor?" She
asked softly.

"At sixteen?" Nabiki put in, more than a trifle stunned by this as well.

~Slip up.~ Jared reminded himself.

"Well, he's all the better for Kasumi, then." Akane put in gladly. "Just think, you want to go into
medicine, don't you sis? This'll be perfect. You can borrow his medical reference library to study
from and he can help you with your training!"

"How did you get to be a doctor?" Kasumi asked, unconsciously moving toward him.

He based his explanation as close to the truth as possible. "Um, well, you see caring for injuries is
your basic, standard fare for adventurers, I mean wandering martial artists. A study of natural
things was a hobby of mine, then there's a martial art that teaches atemi and shiatsu attacks, and
by the time you've mastered it you're as familiar with nerves, blood flow and all that as any
surgeon. From there it wasn't a big deal to pick up a license. You can skip most of the college
courses by passing yourself off as a foreign doctor seeking to certify here, and just needing to
brush up on a few things, which I did. I'm more into herbs than your prescription drugs, because
herbs were more available and frankly have fewer side effects, but I'm competent at least in most
things."

Jared lowered his hand and touched a control on his waist, causing the concealed superspy toys to
go into secret motion as he went on. "In fact, you can look me up, I'm certified in the local board.
I even have a patent on a new surgical technique that's for dealing with restoring function to
paralyzation victims." On impulse he went a little overboard. "There's a few international
organizations reviewing my cures for diabetes and senility, too. I'll let you know how that goes."

Jaws had dropped universally to the floor, and Soun was having visions of yen signs and a wealthy
retirement rich beyond his previous imaginings dance around his head.

Kasumi found herself fighting the urge to give a glomp, whatever that was.

Nabiki was sorrowing that from now on he'd think she was after his money, and found herself
*more* interested in proving that she was not and yet getting him anyway. The difficulty of doing
this surrounded her.

"So it's settled then." Akane beamed gladly. "He can support Kasumi. She's just the sort of person
he needs and vice versa. They'll be perfect together, while I become a nun and visit the sick and
afflicted, removing what suffering I can."

"It sounds like a good plan. Good luck, Akane." Jared began, only to still himself as a dimensional
tracer found its mark and he could suddenly *feel* himself pinpointed by an outside force.
Whether it was friendly or an enemy, however... His hand began to rove near Mara's PokeBall.

Soun noted that the decision was about to be put off again. "RRRRAANNNNMMMAAAA!" The
Demon Head began to form.

Jared gave him a level gaze, spreading his feet wide into an appropriate stance while his fingers
strayed near his katana's hilt. "Mr. Tendo, if you use force to get your way I shall use force to
resist you. I consider this fair warning. If you want my cooperation there are many tools with
which to get it, these include persuasion, logic, reason, even kindness and love unfeigned. But
force and intimidation tactics will be met in a like manner. That is only simple justice." He gave a
grave and serious nod. "I thank you for your hospitality, but..."

The youth blinked to find Soun wrapped around his waist, bawling his eyes out and begging him
to stay.

---------

"Trace Completed!" Celeste shouted, joyous in being able to do this and clear up one of the
dimensional messes going on. Also, the fact that Jared's Belldandy and Urd companions were
hanging onto her seat's back in anxious concern was a motivation. *Nobody* would ever want to
disappoint Belldandy in any way, no matter her guise, and the fact that Urd was now newly
reinstalled as a goddess second class, limited, primary sphere Alchemy, had a little to do with it as
well. Nobody likes to sip a drink and wake up the next day an entirely different race or gender.
That Urd had retained her side hobby and was now Mistress of the Harem as her secondary
sphere had a few unwed females scurrying for cover.

"Knight Sabers! Go!!" Sylia Stingray informed her group, as the dimensional access port opened
to a size able to admit them.

"Laser Angels, To The Hunt!!"

"Scout Planetary Teleport!"

"Raywing!"

"Lock & Load!"

"Thundercats, Ho!"

And a dozen other group phrases that led up to the largest collection of highly trained (in
violence, not in medicine) nurses able to devastate planetary environs ever assembled going off to
the target timeline to "rescue" Jay-chan.

"First one to get his lips gets to cuddle him for the whole night!" Yuri challenged the rest as the
two Lovely Angels skipped ahead of the rest.

=====
Toriohime (Bird Princess) is from an old series by the guy who did "Gegege No Kitaro" -
"Akumakun". "Anpanman" is from the series of the same name. "Saint Tail" is another one of
those "Magical Princess" shows aimed at very young girls.


Next chapter, The Abduction of Jay-chan!
Will the real Ranma stand up!
And what do you with a drunken Ami?