Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ Third Labor (Forward to the past) ❯ the abduction of Jay-chan ( Chapter 8 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Third Labor, chapter 8

The abduction of Jay-chan? Oh my, the naughty nurses!
or... ersatz Senshi & the Red Rider

DISCLAIMER: If not satisfied with this fanfic, contact your ISP provider for a full refund.

---------

Akane looked up towards the ceiling with a worried expression. "There's something... hang on."

Everyone stared with various thoughts running through their heads as Akane pulled out a small
cross on a chain and held it over the table.
"Spirits of goodness and of light,
Lend to me thy distant sight,
A vision of the coming fight,
So i know which course is right..."

"And what was that supposed to... do... Akane?!" Nabiki had tried to rally that little cynical
portion of her persona. As flickering patterns of light formed around the cross, that skeptical
fragment dragged itself off to a corner of her mind and shot itself.

Akane seemed to go into a trance. "A heavenly host currently searches for their brave hero. i see
implements of torture readied. And they come seeking..."

No one was surprised when Akane's gaze fixed on Ranma. "A kami disguised."

Jared freaked, though not obviously to anyone watching. The nursing staff had apparently found
him and were about to do all sorts of things to his poor injured body.

"Kami... disguised?" Soun repeated disbelievingly.

A little distressed that his stay had been cut short, Jared shrugged. He'd have to leave soon if this
was any indication. "I'm afraid I've allowed your preconceptions to remain without disputing
them. I'm what you would call a kami, here disguised by an 'ally' as Ranma so I'd have a chance to
heal. The *real* Ranma should be here in one week's time."

Light sparkled in the back yard, forming a line which began to part open.

"I don't have much time. The allies that seek me, well, there's danger if they accompany me."
(Danger to my health and well being. Good intentions are, alas, not enough.)

"That's Staging Area Four, Asgard," Akane said in disbelief, seeing the shapes in the background
of the throng. "That means..."

Jared had gotten a few items from the Rival Relief Office during a brief visit. He'd mainly been
intrigued. The RRO tended to be low-powered individuals who scavenged for resources on their
missions to different universes. They brought a number of items back to be analyzed and used in
future missions. Hoi Hoi Cappsules and Pokeballs were among those items that were absolutely
safe for the user. Elemental bracers had proven to be less safe, and there were other items that
likewise were either unsafe (but kept around in case someone could fix them) or just plain
unresearched.

Rather than take a chance with Mara again, Jared held up a device that looked like a cube of clear
jello. The Galaxy Police Cube was an invocation of Clarke's Law: "any technology sufficiently
advanced enough is indistinguishable from magic." The problem was that controlling the device
was darn near impossible. Potentially, though, it was of extreme value to the Mage and why he
had added it to his list of "things to research when I get a free decade" (a truly huge file).
Theoretically, it had the ability to sort and manage "stuffspace" to such a degree that one could
darn near hide a Galaxy class starship up one's sleeves with the device's help.

Also instantly changing clothes and doing other impossible things without magic. VERY useful if,
as now, one's magical resources had been cut off. One minor such feat was teleportation. Jared
abruptly vanished.

Nabiki squeaked when she saw HERSELF (twice!) in the Heavenly Throng materializing in their
backyard.

"Where is Jay-chan?!" A ponytailed girl floating in midair asked. "His ki is so low I can't read it!"

"Scanning," said a girl with short blue hair, "I have a trace!"

"TALLY HO!"

"WAIT! WAIT! WAIT!" Akane started jumping up and down, waving her arms as the crowd
flew over her head. "Take me! Please! I'm "

**CLANG**

Kasumi lowered the skillet, now knowing that Akane was trying to die for a reason. Something to
do with the crowd of divine (?) beings flying over the house. Well, Akane would just have to wait.
"Nabiki, can you give me a hand dragging Akane back into the house? Nabiki?"

Nabiki was still staring out into the yard, though there was nothing there currently.

"Father, can you..." Kasumi looked at the crumpled heap of her father and sighed. Grabbing
Akane's legs, she dragged her little sister back into the house.

*WHACK!*

"Akk!" Akane woke up as her head bashed into the stone first step. "Huh?"

*THUD!*

"Hey!" Akane said weakly, feeling her head impact the second step.

*CRACK!* Door tracks. "No not the... " *WHAP! WHAP! WHAP! WHAP! WHAP! WHAP!
WHAP! WHAP! WHAP! WHAP!* "...stairs. Ittei!" *THUNK!*

Kasumi finished putting Akane to bed, wondering where all these extra bumps and bruises had
come from. Then got a sponge to clean her younger sister off before dressing her.

----------

RIFTS Earth:

"Bringing up file," Rei said. She'd been inside Grey's mind, so of course she had an idea what
password to use. They were a bit curious about their destination.

[Timeline RF-NX 100101][Mission 12 Notes][Jabberworks] a hidden company set up by a group
of adventurers who frankly had trouble finding anyone local who qualified as "the good guys" and
so came up with their own company based on two major finds. One, the pandimensional entity
known as the 'Jabberwok' - a non-evil alien intelligence so alien that they haven't found a means of
communicating. The second, a military base in Alaska that had survived the coming of the Rifts
but not the cutting off of supplies.
The Jabberwok uses a form of 'quantum origami' - things near it tend to be folded along their
probability lines. A laser cannon might be folded into an old machinegun or some other type of
item, but it will always bear some resemblence to whatever it originally was. Was not capable of
getting close enough to use a Universal Translator.
The military base was mainly a listening station. Nothing fancy from the few reports, though
that may be just commonsense "nothing here worth looking for" and as the mission didn't go up
there, also nothing confirmed.
Jabberworks is mainly concerned with trade, using large hover platforms or cargolifters to
reach small communities. They supply a number of one-of-a-kind items, which helps to field test
those items and determine if they are suitable for reproducing and manufacturing.
This is their publically known emphasis. They have ties to the Colorado Baronies, including a
trading post in Hope. It became obvious during the completion of the mission that the
organization lacks the raw power necessary to fight the Coalition, the Federation of Magic, or any
of the Big Bads in a straight up. But their longterm goals are pretty much diametrically opposed
to said bad guys.
Further data unavailable. i request investigation as soon as possible. If initial impressions bear
out, these are definitely candidates for whatever Divine Intervention can be given them.
ADDENDUM: Additional presence/base in the old town of Quartzite near what used to be the
California/Arizona border in that area.

"So what do you make of it?" Apple requested of her colleagues.

Ree Fukami didn't look up from where she was driving. "I've lined with Jabberworks. Guard dog
positions and convoy stuff. Bought stuff from 'em too. Heck, they've gotten me spare parts for my
Glitter Boy. Mainly, they're operators and engineers, or like the report says - traders. Ya watch
out for 'em on lotsa stuff- the trade items are usually a lotta crap or marked up hefty. Damn good
fixers though, and usually they don't charge that much compared to some of the mech-heads out
there. They put out a lot of basic type vehicles. ATVs, some cycles, also camping equipment and
other basic supplies. They's considered small potatoes, indeps, not important enough to warrant
the Dead Boys goin' outta their way for a stomping."

Apple blinked as she processed that. Rei tried to work out the strange dialect.

Ree's voice altered to the flatter tones of Honey. "She means that by maintaining a low profile, the
Coalition and other potential hostiles view them as not being worth the value of the bullets
required to kill them."

"So we're heading to Quartzite because..." Rei let her voice trail off.

Apple answered. "Because Grey's native self is there. Do we have any data other than Fleece's
reference?"

"Yup," answered Ree, back to the odd twang she had when it wasn't Honey or Minako speaking.
"Look for a True Atlantean Techno-Wizard who goes by the name Rimshot. Met him a couple of
times. Runs around with a Utility Belt and handful of gadgets. We made a pretty good team as
caravan guards. I'd blast the big targets, he'd use his Porta-Wall or some other gadget to give my
powerarmor some advantage."

"What's a Techno-Wizard anyway? I find no record in my memories." Apple asked of Ree, since
she seemed to have most of the answers.

"A type of wizard who incorporates spells into gadgets," Ree said, driving around a few boulders
and a fleeing cactus. She hadn't known there were cactuar in the area. Too bad they were in a
hurry. The animal/plant critters were about half the size of a cactus people and threw dozens of
sharp needles in a fight. But you could gather those needles up and use them for a variety of
purposes. Put a few hundred together in a boom gun casing and it made a nice anti-vampire
round. "Rimshot's got a gun enchanted to throw lightning bolts and fireballs, though I hear he
mainly uses a Wilk's 457 pulse laser nowadays. Goblin bombs, oh, and his armor's got stealth and
escape enchantments. Last I heard, Rimshot was working on a way to put a TW enhancement on
a normal tech weapon like a Boom Gun. Think mainly he came up with the idea after his helmet
got damaged in that last run and his hearing got a bit battered from being too close to a shot."

"Too close?" Rei wasn't sure what that meant but it didn't sound good.

"That powerarmor back there's called a 'Glitter Boy' and it was passed down to me from my
Uncle. Been in my family three generations, at least! That big gun is the 'Boom Gun' and it gets
that name from causing a sonic boom when it's fired. Does a *lot* of damage. Heck, one good
hit'll cripple most anything the Coalition put out. *If* you can hit 'em, that is."

"So when do we get to Quartzite?" Apple was anxious to meet this local version of her Master.

"About three more hours. There's lotsa holes and washes and mountains we gotta go around. Ya
don't wanna go near the old freeway. Sure mainly it's a flat ribbon, even got bits of the old road
surface, but there's a dragon out near the White Tank mountains and some real unfriendly types if
you go up towards Wormrot. So ya gotta go between. We can stop at a small settlement called
Nameless in between, stretch our legs and get some java. Or oil if that's you're preference."

-----------

The vehicle was nothing special as it pulled into Quartzite. ATVs of various types, only
marginally different from each other, had been around for over twenty years. They weren't fancy
to begin with: just a minor vehicle tough enough to withstand a few shots of laser fire and an
electric or gasoline engine.

ATV pickup trucks were *very* common in the New West for a simple reason. They were tough,
dependable, and very utilitarian. It didn't matter if the owner worked on a ranch, worked
construction, was a merc, or a blacksmith, or a vet. A basic cabin with a cargo area at a low price
appealed to the masses who didn't have the money or inclination for fancy.

Jabberworks had four basic models and a number of attachments and upgrades that the buyer
could get installed or install themselves later.

That this one was painted in a camouflage pattern of muted browns and greys was also pretty
typical. A few ranchers and the like used bright colors, but there were a lot of things out in the
desert whose attention you were better off avoiding.

A small dragon wearily lifted his head, sniffed the air, then snorted and went back to his afternoon
siesta.

A thin middle-aged man got out of the truck after stopping in front of the general store. "Suzi,
you stay here and keep an eye on the truck."

"Nope," Suzi disagreed, getting out herself. "After roughing it for the past three days? I'm going
to get some soap and some hot water and clean up."

The man shook his head as if he knew arguing would be futile. "Fine. I'll see if there's any signs or
portents while you do."

"Do that." The woman shifted her long hair about and turned an eye towards the horizon. "I'll tell
you right now that they'll be here in a few hours. Not before. And there's something... oddly
familiar about them."

Not for the first time, Rimshot found himself wishing he had some clairvoyant talents like Suzi
did. "Okay. Then we'll meet them in a few hours, I guess."

"You won't need the rifle," Suzi said, concerning herself with more important things. Like
removing the layer of dust that had accumulated on her.

------------

Akane groaned and stirred herself. Her head hurt. Sitting up, she noticed that she was in her
bedroom, that there was an odd scent in the air and that she was wearing...

Akane kept from screaming but it was a very near thing. Transparent, pink, soft, silky. Very very
feminine. And little pink lace panties. Akane didn't RIP the clothing off, but it was also a very near
thing. And then stood staring at the garments as if they would get up and attack her.

Sniffing, she also determined that the odd scent was a perfume or something similar and it was
coming off of HER. Someone had given her a sponge bath, brushed her hair, and...

Akane was about to become ill. Someone had played dress up with her while she was
unconscious. Maybe she should sneak off and go join that nunnery NOW. Soun Tendo said that
she was still too young to do this without parental consent, but did she really want to believe
anyone who had trained under Happosai? All this needed to be truly something out of a nightmare
was for Kuno or someone to show up.

There was a polite knock an instant before Kasumi stuck her head in. "Akane! Breakfast is
ready!"

Akane winced, and not just from the still present headache. If she'd been out of it that long then
"Ranma" (whoever he'd been really) would have already left *with* all those girls.

Kasumi watched her sister for a moment. "Oh, and Akane, I've made an appointment for you to
see a doctor today. You haven't been looking well at all of late."

"Gee, i wonder why..." Akane mumbled.

Kasumi paused for a moment before adding. "Oh, and you might want to put some clothes on."

The physically youngest Tendo spent a moment glaring at the door before giving a long sigh.
She'd just have to put on the gi or those slacks and she'd be able to face them.

Akane went to the closet and frowned. "What the?!" No gi, no pants, no t-shirts or anything of
the sort. The only thing that had anything approaching pants was a pink jumper (she thought that
was what it was called) that would eventually be given to Ranma in the series.

It still felt *wrong* to be wearing feminine clothing. Yes, that especially included underwear.
Grey had been female on four or five occasions (shudder) and had not once felt comfortable doing
it. Ranko and Banana had been special exceptions, as it hadn't really been him - more like an
analogue - a seperate aspect of the same soul.

Serious creep factor in several respects to find that your "elder sister" had taken an active role in
taking care of you. And had been rearranging your room. The frilly sheets, stuffed animals, and...
what in the worlds was Kasumi thinking?!

Another knock on the door, and Nabiki opened it this time. "C'mon, Akane, you can't sit up here
all day. Dear me, aren't you ever going to get dressed?"

"But i..." Akane pointed at the clothing on the rack. "Where's my gi?"

Nabiki sighed, went to the dresser, pulled out a bra and panty, then rummaged around in the
closet. "HERE! Just get dressed young lady."

"W-w-what?!" Akane stared at the clothing. THAT wasn't something that she thought she could
wear. *Especially* in public.

"You haven't taken any religious vows yet," Nabiki gently chided, inwardly smirking at the
vengeance she was getting on her younger sister. Then thought about seeing herself in that
Heavenly Host and lost enthusiasm for getting even. "Look, Akane, Kasumi's been talking to Dr
Tofu and a few other people about how you were acting and she came up with this as a measure.
You'll go see the doctor later and that'll be your chance to get this little agenda thrown out."

"Why did she..." Akane's eyes fell on the stuffed panda and she repressed another shudder.

"She got the idea that the whole thing with school and everything was that you were forced into a
dominantly masculine role," Nabiki said, watching as her little sister put the panties on backwards
then corrected herself. Privately she thought Kasumi *might* have something here after all.
"Anyway, so she's got this idea that your feminine inner nature being suppressed by this forced
masculine outer nature is causing your current problems."

Akane muttered under her breath about not having any feminine inner nature.

Nabiki raised an eyebrow but otherwise gave no indication she'd heard. "So, Kasumi and Daddy
came up with this idea of reinforcing basic feminine behavior. You ought to wear that more often,
it looks good on you."

"No defensive value, thin fabric, barely covers anything..." Akane mumbled. A yellow dress of
some thin material whose skirt barely covered mid-thigh.

"C'mon, sis..." Nabiki stopped. Her sister's face had always conveyed what she was feeling quite
well. It passed through disgust and embarrasment to just plain "someone please kill me." Nabiki
cleared her throat. "Well, Akane, let's go. If nothing else just think of how this'll..."

"Nabiki," interrupted Akane, "if you say anything at all involving boys finding this sort of thing
attractive, i will be violently ill. All over you."

Nabiki shut her mouth with an audible click. "Oh well, so much for that."

Akane's head came up and she glanced at the calender. March 3rd. She had a couple of letters to
write.

Downstairs, Soun frowned and glanced at his oldest daughter. "Are you sure about this Kasumi?
Akane is the heir to the Tendo school, and in that fight her skills were..."

Kasumi nodded. "I'm sure, Father. I don't really know about this agreement with Saotome-san.
But I'm sure if Akane meets a nice boy, and has love and children in her life, she'll have enough to
live for that she'll forget all about these suicide attempts."

Soun nodded. He still had two other daughters that could fulfill the union. And neither Kasumi
nor Nabiki had been quite so negative after that disguised kami. "So what do you expect Doctor
Tofu to be able to do?"

"Check for a head injury, maybe something else. Possibly he can come up with a better specialist
in these sort of problems." Kasumi looked up as Nabiki came down.

"Problem, sis," Nabiki continued to frown in thought. "This is stressing little sister out more than
it was."

"We'll see what Doctor Tofu can do..." Kasumi's voice trailed off as a sulking Akane came down
the stairs. Apparently she had *not* brushed her hair or anything. Still no makeup. Kasumi
decided she'd have to do something about that. Yes, Akane did need to find a nice boy and settle
down. Love could heal all wounds, and having children would certainly settle any doubts Akane
might be having about her own femininity.

Kasumi continued to plan. If Akane had been able to read minds, she'd have been halfway to
China at this point.

As it was, Akane was just planning on raiding Nabiki's closet. Turnabout was fair play, after all.

----------

Meanwhile, a mage named Jared was discovering one of the Laws Of Anime Universes.

Which was: you can run, you can hide, but these are only temporary solutions.

If someone is looking for you, and you don't want them to find you, they will.

Jared, realizing he was cornered, pulled the PokeBall containing Mara from his pocket. "Mara. I
need an escape route."

The demoness smiled. "But, of course, darling."

----------

Elsewhere:

Ginseng, the third of a series of marionettes built using human engrams, groaned and got up.
*Diagnostic. All systems functioning within designated parameters.*

Gennai and the others watched the marionette get up off the table and examine herself.

"i take it that you were able to recover enough of me that you were able to rebuild me?" Ginseng
finished inspecting herself. "And that a male style body housing was unavailable."

Gennai cleared his throat. "Something like that."

Ginseng nodded. "A female configuration. Well, it doesn't matter too much i suppose. At least as
a female-seeming android i avoid some of the..."

Gennai and the others followed Ginseng's stare to a monitor, then back. After a few minutes, they
began to grow uncomfortable.

Finally Doctor Lorelei broke the silence. "Is something wrong, Ginseng?"

"Who came up with this overall shape?" There was a spark of emotion in Ginseng's voice. Not a
good one either.

"It was... one we had that was a spare with enough processor capacity for..." Lorelei broke off at
the glare from Ginseng.

Ginseng clenched her fists and trembled briefly with her eyes closed and a snarl on her face. When
she finally opened her eyes again, she seemed a little more composed. Slightly. Gennai didn't feel
the need to trigger a laser cage at least.

"i suppose you couldn't have known. It's just... do you mind if i use the processing facilities? i
don't want to spend one more moment looking like HER than i can avoid it."

"Uhm..." Lorelei looked around and others silently agreed that this sounded bad. There was
obviously something horribly wrong with Ginseng's new body that wasn't apparent to anyone
besides Ginseng. "There's a problem with that..."

Birds were startled into flight over Castle Japonesse by a shrieked "WHAT?!?!"

---------

Doctor Tofu closed the door behind him and spoke to Nabiki. Kasumi had lost a great deal of
respect for Doctor Tofu when she'd brought Akane into the office. The good doctor had been
okay while examining her little sister, and had then called Kasumi into the room to consult with
her about his findings.

Akane had screeched and yelped and had fled through the window. Without opening it. And had
then apparently spent considerable time untangling her limbs and trying to pop joints back into
place. Nabiki had found Akane in Nabiki's closet, replacing the clothes she'd left behind.

It had taken a few moments for Doctor Tofu to even notice that his patient had fled.

Yes, Kasumi had lost a *lot* of respect for Doctor Tofu.

"So what is it, Doctor? Why is Akane acting like this?" Nabiki crossed her arms and considered
him briefly.

"I've never seen a woman's chi so far out of alignment. It's a *very* male pattern. It's also much
stronger than I would have thought possible for Akane. What has been going on that she's
changed so much? Oh... YOUR pattern has changed too, Nabiki. You seem more thoughtful, but
underneath you're seething as if you are confused about something." Tofu straightened his glasses.

Nabiki frowned and began telling Tofu about what she had observed. Kuno's challenge, Akane's
stress, the horde of hentai boys, a particularly bad day where Akane had taken some
decongestants (a pepper bomb from the school's Chem Club had aggravated allergies) and gone to
sit in the furo. SOMETHING had happened, and Akane had been trying to kill herself until
Kasumi caused her to promise that she wouldn't. Then she briefly went around trying to get
someone ELSE to kill her. Kasumi had put a stop to that too, requiring Akane's promise in return
for letting Akane out of a makeover session planned for late afternoon. Kasumi had merely
rescheduled it, but no one was going to mention that to Akane at the moment.

Doctor Tofu nodded. "Did you notice that Akane was using the masculine forms when speaking?"

Nabiki nodded. She'd noticed that. AND would occasionally break out in the Osaka dialect. And
the way she sat, walked, and ran were all masculine.

"It looks as though the trauma experienced at school was sufficient to cause her to 'shift' in
personality. She was always a tomboy, and she was mistaken for a boy on occasion when she was
growing up, so maybe she decided that the remembered male identity was a 'safe haven' from her
current problems." Tofu straightened his glasses again. "She's also uncomfortable with her
femininity. Any questions impinging on that, or when I examined the shiatsu points around her
thighs or breasts, made her extremely uncomfortable. Even more so than the last time she came in
for an exam."

"Yeah, but that was almost a year ago," Nabiki pointed out but nodded. This was pretty much
what she and Kasumi had come up with. "So what can we do?"

"Reinforce her feminine self image whenever possible. Let her know that she's loved." Tofu
thought for a few moments, then began writing on a piece of paper. "It's possible that Akane will
come out of this on her own, but... There's a couple of doctors to try. One's a physician, the other
a psychologist. If there's an organic cause I couldn't find, the physician should be able to
determine it. The psychologist is in case there is no physical cause."

Nabiki nodded and took the paper. It would dent the family's finances, but things couldn't
continue as they were. "Thank you Doctor. This will do."

Elsewhere, Akane had tried once again to call the office. Once again, none of the numbers that
Grey knew worked.

---------

Quartzite: RIFTS Earth

Rei looked up at the remote feed monitor. "What's Setsuna doing here?"

Ree frowned, pulling the ATV to a stop. "That's not yer Setsuna. That's the local equivelant, just
as I'm the local of yer Minako."

"You sure? Setsuna has some odd habit of showing up unexpectedly." Rei remembered that, it
had been most annoying.

"How often did your version show up wearing Urban Warrior body armor and carrying a staff
that's *gotta* be magic?"

"What makes you think it's magic?" Rei glanced between the monitor and Ree.

"Is the Pope Jewish? Of course, it's magic! Rimshot would have given it a basic TW enchantment
if he's hanging around with her..." Ree frowned, not entirely sure where the sudden bite of
jealousy came from.

Blueberry/Ami/Mercury mumbled something in her (their?) sleep from the back seat.

"Uhm... THAT's Master? He's... older." Hotaru frowned. Mamoru Tengoku had been in his teens.
Rimshot was in his 40s or so.

"Oh dear." Apple increased the resolution and saw that this was so.

A few hundred yards away, two people watched the ATV and wondered why it had stopped, and
what the occupants were doing.

--------

"Nabiki-CHAN!"

Nabiki winced as Akane leapt over a wall, landing gracefully beside her. Akane was wearing the
red and white hakima that indicated she was in "shrine priestess" mode. "Uhm, what is it, Akane?"

"Nabiki, i'm *so* proud of you!" Akane beamed at her sister. "You've cut back on the blackmail,
the larceny, the shameless taking advantage of any opportunity for a profit! BLESS YOU!"

~I have?!~ Nabiki blinked with a squeegee noise, finding herself the recipient of a sudden
affectionate hug. ~When did I do that?!~

"Sis, i've spent so much time worrying about you, wondering if you'd ever purge the darkness
corrupting your soul. Your heart had gotten so cold..."

Nabiki stared at Akane when her little sister broke away and wiped *tears* off her face. "Uhm...
Akane... I..."

Akane smiled joyfully at Nabiki, tears still brimming from her eyes. ~Dang it, emotional control is
so difficult for this body. Is it because this is a *normal* (relatively) human girl?~ "Nabiki, i've
been worried about you for so long. Don't give up! You can do it!"

"Errrr..." Nabiki found herself blushing but a thought penetrated her confusion. She hadn't seen
Akane this upbeat about anything in... quite some time. ~I haven't changed. Have I?~

"Sis, I want you to have this," Akane reached into one of her sleeves and withdrew a bag.

Nabiki took it, puzzled, opened it, and STARED. "Akane, where did you get this?! There must be
a couple of thousand yen in here!"

"Spoils of war," said Akane with a bittersweet smile. "There's 15000 yen, a Rolex, three
switchblades, two diamond rings, and a Nomo autographed baseball. i figured you'd be able to get
a better deal than me for them. If you want, i can show you tonight, but you *have* to promise
me not to tell 'Daddy' - he'd freak just on general principles."

"Sure, Akane," said Nabiki, crossing her fingers behind her back. ~If Akane's stealing stuff, this
has to be stopped NOW!~

---------

Nabiki had been a little concerned when her little sister had knocked on her window at 7pm.

She had become a little *more* concerned when said little sister had turned out to be wearing an
outfit that was... well.

Akane had started out with a blue one-piece swimsuit, and had added a red skirt and red hi-top
tennis shoes. Also red gloves with a layer of padding over the knuckles. A red pair of shoulder
pads, red mask, and red ribbon in her hair completed Akane's new look.

Nabiki was speechless, as one might well imagine, by this sight. Akane simply grabbed Nabiki, put
a gold harlequin mask in her hands, and started leaping from rooftop to rooftop at a rate of speed
that made Nabiki wish she'd grabbed a Dramamine.

Nabiki had quite lost track of where they were when Akane abruptly slowed and the surroundings
became less of a blur. "Akane what are..." Nabiki found a hand covering her mouth as she was set
onto her feet once again.

"Shhhh," cautioned Akane and pointed below them.

Nabiki kept quiet and casually looked over the edge of the roof, feeling a bit queasy when she
noticed how far below the ground was.

There was a group of local thugs, shaking down some girl who'd obviously gotten lost. Nabiki
frowned, then turned to Akane to ask what exactly was going on. Nabiki blinked and felt
goosebumps form as she realized that her crazy little sister was muttering under her breath and
tracing glowing lines in the air.

Akane finished whatever she was doing, smiled at her sister, then stepped off the edge of the roof.

Nabiki looked down to see if what she feared was happening.

The thug adjusted his shades (despite that it was early evening) and stepped forward. "Aw c'mon
little girl, don't you want to party with us?"

"I'll give you my money, just let me go!" The girl backed up slightly, looking thoroughly out of
place.

The thug smiled and shrugged. "Well, you'll give us the money, FOR STARTS..."

*BOOM*

Something landed in the alleyway, proving to be a girl in a very silly costume.

"Where bandits threaten, i'm there to take 'em down. When evil wakens, my duty is to fight to it!
Presenting the high school babe! Sabre Mars! In the name of Justice, i'll punish you!" Akane
posed in sentai fashion.

"huh?!" Not only the thugs were sweatdropping, their victim was a bit embarassed by all this too.

The first thug started walking towards the newcomer, flipping a knife open in his hand. "Look,
little girl, if you want to play dress-up..."

"HURRICANE KICK!" *WHACKUM!* Akane's kick managed to imbed the thug in the wall. Of
the second floor. He hung there for a moment before landing in a dumpster.

"She-she... She flattened Jigo!"

"LET'S GET HER!"

Akane seemed to become a red and blue blur. "A-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-TA!
Wah-TAH!"

"Hah! Didn't even hurt!"

"Secret Amazon Technique: Poisoned chestnuts!" Akane held up a long needle which had been
concealed in her hand.

"Huh?!" *THUD* *THUD* *THUD* *THUD* *THUD* *THUD*

"Who? What?" The victim was staring around at a lot of snoozing thugs.

"Sorry ma'am. It's just me and my sidekick, Mercenary Girl," Akane jerked a thumb towards the
roof, "making the streets safe for decent folk."

The girl blinked a couple of times, then fainted.

"Chikusho!" Akane looked at the crumpled heap. "They keep doing that. Oh well."

In the manner of experienced RPGers everywhere, Akane quickly stripped the bandits of
everything valuable, carried the victim to a safe haven, and returned to the rooftop.

Nabiki's expression was unreadable as 'Sabre Mars' rejoined her. "Is this how you got that
money?"

"Yes," Akane posed. "Criminals don't deserve to profit from their evil!"

*SLAP!*

Akane looked startled.

Nabiki's eyes watered, both from her hand getting hurt and from reaction. "You... STUPID!"

"What? What's wrong, Nabiki?" Akane was puzzled by this, having expected Nabiki to be wildly
enthusiastic about this.

"How could you?" Nabiki bit off saying something and tried again. "Don't you know how
dangerous this is? What if they had a gun? What if you were hurt? What if..."

Akane blinked, finding her arms full of crying Nabiki and completely unsure of how to handle this.
She settled for just holding her "sister" and murmurring encouraging sounds, getting Nabiki to sit
down after a minutes.

Eventually Nabiki got control of herself. Akane offered her a bandana which Nabiki blew her nose
with. Akane politely indicated that Nabiki should hold on to it for now.

"...Akane..." Nabiki continued to hold onto her sister. "We don't need the money *that* badly.
Please don't go..."

Akane sighed and patted her sister on the back, and reflected that it was a good thing that she was
her sister and not a guy in this situation. "Nabiki, we cannot always choose how we live or how
we die. We are part of a society as a whole and to some extent the currents of that ocean of
humanity force us into roles we don't choose. You *can* fight the current and try to go in a
different direction - though it's harder to fight the current and some do try and fail."

"...but I don't want to lose my sister..." Nabiki sniffled.

Ignoring that her own hair was toinging and that she wanted to know WHY Nabiki had changed
so much from the "profit uber alles" girl she HAD been, Akane continued to pat Nabiki's back.
"Nabiki. i can't promise that i'll always be there for you. But i'm here for you now. Will you be
here for me?"

Nabiki nodded and wiped tears even as she reached for the bag. If her sister was going to do
something so foolish and irresponsible, at least SHE could make sure the money wasn't wasted.
THEN she'd do her best to talk little sister out of this insane hobby!

Mercenary Girl stared at the loot. Well, maybe a hiatus at least.

---------

RIFTS Earth:

The image of Fleece clicked and faded in and out like a cheap hologram.

Appropriate as that was what it was.

Apple asked the same question again, hoping for a better answer. "So why didn't he merge with
Rimshot here?"

"I don't know," repeated Fleece. "Right now there's a lot of system problems that the techies are
sorting through. It looks as though his aspects are fragmenting and he's been merged with a
non-Analogue aspect. Other than that we can't tell the why or where." Fleece smirked. "There's
plenty of bets and speculation for now."

"Can we go there?" Grape shifted her vibrohalberd around. How could she protect him if he was
in a different universe?

Fleece shook her head. "Nah, transport's screwed up. Divines are OK, we've got our primary
methods. While the databases and links are being rebuilt, everything else is subject to crossrips
and bounces."

"Like it hasn't always been," grumbled Rei.

"Hmmmph. Before you ask, I can't do it either," Rimshot informed them. "Transdimensional spells
are tricky and not something Techno-Wizards usually work with. However, Suzi here had an
idea."

The native version of Setsuna nodded. "I come from a place far from here known as Psyscape. If
we were to go there, we could utilize their resources and perhaps get to where your version of
Rimshot is."

"Or you could simply wait. In a few days things should be stabilized enough that you can be
relocated," Fleece pointed out. "In any case, I'll contact you again if anything comes up!"

Rimshot frowned. He wasn't sure about this gestalt thing. "We may have a problem with getting
to Psyscape. With the Coalition's war with Tolkeen, going anywhere near the Federation of Magic
is going to be tres difficult."

Ree tapped the table with a nail, thinking for a few more moments. "There's another possibility."

---------

Akumakun/Ranma timeline:

The Big Day had arrived.

True to the kami's word, they had received a postcard from Genma stating that he would be in
town with Ranma on a certain day. That the mail had delayed this delivery until the time they were supposed to be there was no surprise to anyone, given the delays in the typical mail system.

Tendo,
Arriving in Nerima. Bringing Ranma.
Saotome.

Kasumi was staring sorrowfully at the little white notebook she held in her hand while the kitchen burbled and bubbled with the sound of a meal being prepared. To her, the list on the lined page had grown distressingly long. ~Let's see, by now I've promised to join her if she kills herself, shave my hair if she does...~ That last was worth a whimper, because she was worried that her sister might press it and she didn't like that thought at all! ~And go on a Lady Godiva ride in protest if Akane didn't dress properly and wear feminine clothes.~

Kasumi's mind tried to freeze shut on that last thought. She hadn't known what else to *do*,
Akane was being so obstinate! She honestly didn't believe that she'd go through with it, but the threat had to appear real. It was Kasumi's distress over this, though she didn't know it, that had actually convinced Akane to take it somewhat seriously.

Lying didn't come naturally to Kasumi. It was worth some distress.

Kasumi had threatened a hunger strike until Akane had agreed not to deliberately set things up so that someone else would kill her. Kasumi had also promised that she wouldn't require Akane to eat sashimi in return for Akane seeing that nice doctor. The appointment had gone smoothly,
blood tests had been taken, the doctor had asked a lot of questions, and tomorrow she and Akane
would go back to the doctor. THEN she could find out if the Doctor's plans for treatment would
work. Though how to get Akane to take the pills, Kasumi wanted to shrink in horror at what she
might have to threaten to get Akane to keep with the treatment.

Her father poked his head in the kitchen. "Kasumi, it's time?"

The eldest daughter looked up from her meditations. "Oh? I'll have to turn the heat down, I
suppose. Do you know if I'll have time to change?"

Soun nodded, disappearing.

Kasumi sucked in her lower lip. If she just rushed she could get this meal ready and then leave it on to warm, then rush up for a quick change to something formal!

Nabiki was closeted in her room, facing a big problem.

The big problem was her hobby, her pet project, something she'd spent years in steadily building. A reputation as a cold ice queen does not come without sacrifices, and the image of someone to fear and tremble before (so that people are prompt in paying their money) was carefully cultivated and very fragile. Her business was at stake.

But somehow she couldn't even *imagine* one of her Heavenly Selves doing this.

It was a fairly simple case: She had a student by the balls. He owed her money, and was plainly
and simply delinquent. It was a simple case of tell his girlfriend what he didn't want her to know, wait for the pain of that to set in, and then threaten the next stage if he didn't pay up. Open and shut, something she'd done often enough to *gain* the Ice Queen iron mercenary
reputation and by not doing she'd begin to lose both, get the image of being a softy. From there it was straight out of business for her.

The thought of being called an iron mercenary twisted her guts after the things her younger sister and that kami had said and believed of her, but it was true. You either had that rep or you didn't get on in this line of work. It merely stank that people close to her, that she actually *cared* about, had believed it. Especially to THAT extent.

To Nabiki it had always been something of a mask, something she put on or took off as she
pleased. A game where she was in complete control of all the players.

Having that mask *taken* for her was still worth the shudders.

Then there was her sister's active nightstyle. Nabiki had reasoned and begged and pleaded, and
Akane had agreed to shelve 'Sabre Mars' for awhile. Not permanently.

There were other possibilities that Akane was trying to feel Nabiki out on. Akane had explained
that she would *not* charge for her miracles. If Nabiki were to arrange something that helped pay the bills, that would be Nabiki's assistance. Or, Nabiki winced, as Sabre Mars' sidekick Mercenary Girl (the name would *have* to be changed) they could make quite a bit of money, but at a higher danger level.

Nabiki continued to stew and ponder, her thoughts continuing in a loop.

Soun knocked and poked his head in the room. "Nabiki, this is the day Ranma is to arrive."

His middle daughter looked up from her work, brushing a strand of hair out from her eyes.
"Alright daddy. I'll be ready. Have you told Akane yet?"

Soun winced. "I was, uh... waiting. Until, you know..."

Nabiki closed her eyes in exaggerated tolerance. "Daddy, you *know* it won't get any better for
waiting. If you tell her now we'll have all that much extra time to fix whatever mess she causes over it before they get here."

The head of the Tendo family bowed his head and murmured something in agreement, then began
to drag his steps over to the dojo, where the shearing screech of a chainsaw was clearly audible amid the tortured wails of its target.

Opening the dojo door revealed the source of Soun's pain. Akane brushed a strand of one of her
bangs back out of her eyes behind her ear, adjusted the powertool, and with it bit into the wood. Soon she had another limb cut from the trunk in her improvised lumber mill and cut back the power on the saw, removing her safety goggles to wipe sweat from her face as Soun cried in the background. Then the youngest took her stack of rough cut logs under one arm and went and
carried them over to her workbench where the other saws would transform them into planks and
boards.

The head of the Tendo household continued to cry.

Dumping her load of lumber into a bin, the youngest turned to face her 'daddy', pulling off her ear protection and dabbing at her face with a cloth - lacy and pink against all her objections as to the impracticality of that style. Unfortunately her red bandanas had vanished in the wash.

Soun was taking in his daughter's garb. She had agreed to feminine. However, Akane had never
agreed to *Japanese* feminine! Kasumi had drawn the line at pants, but hadn't been willing to
perform the Ultimate Protest just because his youngest was dressed as a Western Cowgirl. The
knee-length denim skirt was just long enough to cover the tops of her boots, a rope was coiled up at her hip, cotton blouse and cowboy hat were just jarring enough before one noticed the
Indian-style medicine pouch at her other side - containing the items she commonly used in clerical spellcasting.

Cocking one booted foot up against a rough-hewn log, Akane chirped up. "Howdy! So what's up
in these here parts that y'all wandered by?"

The Japanese were very strictly bound up in tradition. But *THEIR* tradition was all of what
mattered. Anything else stuck out and deserved ridicule, scorn or avoidance. Akane had bet
counting on the avoidance, and so far she was 100% right. The local school boys avoided her like the plague. She didn't realize how much of that was guilt and horror.

Soun wept over the injustice of it all.

His youngest daughter wandered, no, it must be said that she *moseyed* on out of her own
personal wood and leather working shop (formerly the Tendo dojo) and went to saddle up her
horse.

"Wait." Soun choked out, barely audible out of his tightened throat.

Chewing on the end of a straw, Akane pushed her Stetson back and gave him the once over with
her eyes. "Well, whaddya want, paw?"

"I would appreciate it if you..." Soun took a deep breath, not looking at her as he desperately
tried to pretend that everything going on here was normal. "I would appreciate it if you wouldn't go tend the herd today. Our family has important business to discuss."

Soun Tendo's flesh creeped up and down along his spine as once again the question surfaced of
how his youngest had been able to get a job as a cowhand so quickly, and this in spite of their
proximity to downtown Tokyo.

Akane knew better. This was Nerima. All she'd had to do was look for Martial Art Ranching and
then found the appropriate teacher one block over the next day, complete with pasture, herd and
range. The amount of yodeling one could get to do in those southwestern style canyons was
impressive, too. Of course, after another week of this she expected strange challengers to show
up trying to burn her farm or drive her off of the range, but that was par for the course down
here.

She'd already had to deal once with bandits and wild Indians. The fact that native American
Indians simply do not occur in modern Japan seemed to be irrelevant. Cattle rustlers would be any day now. And the Indians were a rival school using Indian Wrestling style Martial Arts (2000 year old ancient Arapahi tradition, etc, etc). Still, it was the various black hatted fellows who were the most concerning.

In Japan, only criminals had guns. Akane was still far more capable and comfortable with modern
weapons than bare-handed, so she'd put together a surprise, just in case. Though the last bar fight had really been a rousing one, up until she got near that table, that is. She *still* didn't know where Black Bart and his Dozen Thieves had got the idea that she should table-dance for them. They had barmaids for that. Akane had a feeling that Bart & his Thieves would be returning for revenge soon. It was in-genre.

She drew her attention back when she realized that her 'father' was saying something.

"...and so I would appreciate it if you would..."

She realized that he was in the midst of his third repeat, his frozen brain unable to handle any more. Switching the straw to the other side of her mouth, she answered. "Hey, paw. This is the day we get them new hired hands, ain't it?"

Soun nodded desperately, unable to speak.

Akane mounted her horse (a paint with brown socks) in a leap from behind it, rearing it just for style (and, well, she *enjoyed* watching her 'daddy' turn white). "Send 'em on down to the
farmhouse, will ya? We've got lambing season just ahead and it ain't proper nor rightly neighborly not ta let them folks have a rousing good time roping them little doggies! Yeeha!"

She rode off in a trail of dust, mysteriously summoned on their paved street.

Soun wept even more.

Looking out her bedroom window, Kasumi frowned, biting her lip as she remembered what
Akane had promised to do if any of them tried engaging her to Ranma. A Lady Godiva ride would
be the *least* of her worries, and rather pleasant by comparison. At the very least, Akane had
mentioned they might eventually get a postcard from her - as she'd rather live in the jungle and eat bugs the rest of her life than marry a guy. Soun thought it was a joke. Kasumi knew it wasn't.

Nabiki was watching from her window as well, and was shaking her head. "I swear, any day now
some guy in a sinister black cape is going to tie her down on the railroad tracks - and she'll
*enjoy* it."

Not too far away, Black Bart sneezed into his capuccino.

----------

"Eeek! Perverts!"

A scream split the streets of Nerima. This, in itself, was not unusual. A mob chasing after a lone running figure would later become a local standby, and underwear theft downright common.
Where this scene diverged from the original is that the crowd was NOT composed of outraged
women seeking to regain their articles of clothing, but a horde of perverted boys seeking to steal more of them.

The object of this howling hunt was a young redhaired girl. It was possible, that on an extremely good day, that the right supermodel with four or more hours of makeup and exactly favorable conditions could look this good if the lighting was just right, but it wasn't likely.

She was currently chasing a runaway panda that was holding her shirt, and holding an arm across
her bare chest was hindering her running style. Lagging a trifle behind the furious supernatural beauty and the fleeing panda was a far more normal Ranma-chan, laboring under the weight of three heavy packs and trying not to let the mob get her as second choice to the *other* redhead.

"Gimme back my shirt, you perverted furball!" Shouted the abnormally gorgeous redhaired lass,
presently bouncing along trying not to be indecent.

[At the price that shopkeeper offered for it?] The panda signed back, little yen signs of greed
showing instead of pupils in it's eyes. The sign flipped. [You've got to be crazy.]

Ranko was panting heavily as she labored after the pair of them. A guy on a bicycle caught up
enough to try and grope her as the sex-maddening figure of the faster redhead was still far out of
reach. Ranko gave him a punch that set him flying and stole his bicyle, beginning to catch up to
the fleeing pair.

"I mean it! Give it back NOW!"

The panda stopped running, drooling little yen signs and holding up the placard. [Wait! if he
wanted that much for the *shirt!*] The sign flipped. [How much would he pay for the *panties!*]

"You wouldn't DARE!?!" Shrieked the absolutely gorgeous girl, then, leaping over a net cast by
the yen-crazed panda, ran shrieking off ahead of the whole mob, both arms clasped protectively
over her bosom. "HEEEELP!!!"

It came from out of the sun, riding from the top of a rocky crest, down a sandy slope and into the
light, the pounding of hooves heralding its approach.

VERY stirring banjo music also played, as Akane appeared on the streets of Nerima, crouched
low over the neck of her horse, plunging the mighty steed into greater and greater speed as she
edged it dramatically past the crowd of lust crazed teenage boys. Rising high in the stirrups,
leaping her brave mount over a gorge that had mysteriously appeared in her way for no reason
whatsoever, she passed the girl on the bicycle with a neighborly tip of the hat, then bore down on
the rushing panda in full dramatic might.

Akane swung her off leg around the saddle so both feet rested in one stirrup, charging her horse
and guiding it close to the side of the furry beast. Then she leapt, grabbing the animal by the chops
as her own horse swung clear and the energy of the race she transmitted to the panda bear
in a swing that used her whole body weight to turn the bear's head about and flip it to the rushing
ground.

When the dust cleared Akane had hogtied the animal securely and was standing there posing.
"Yeeha! That there be a dangerous critter!" Ranko rode up and came to a stop, panting, and in the
speed of the chase it had not been evident, but both of the redheads were soaking wet. Akane
tossed the shirt she had reclaimed back to the topless one and went on gloating. "Well, young
ladies, that there varmint sure seems a heap a trouble! Ya'll look wet and hungry too. Help me get
this monster pole-cat up to the Ranch and we can get ya dry and rustle up some good grub for
ya!"

"You got a deal!" Both the redhaired young ladies cried. Just then the mob made noises as the
found a way across the chasm that had blocked their way till now. The one girl *quickly* donned
her shirt as Ranko panted from overexertion.

Akane frowned as the mass of perverted thrillseekers tempted WAY beyond their limits by far too
much display of luscious and tender flesh, moved forward with primal urges as their goal.

Akane's horse came up to her side, without removing her eyes from the dangerous mob, she
grabbed the saddle horn and mounted, pulling the loop of rope free of her side and spurring
directly on toward the onrushing horde o' hentai. She rose in her stirrups, shouting.

"Old West style a Martial Art Ranching, Final Technique! Rowdy Roundup!!" Her rope became a
blur. When the dust settled, she was riding calmly as the day is long away from the entire horde all
wrapped up and bound like a good bale of hay, in fact she was chewing on the end of a straw
stuck in her mouth. Pulling in on the reins to halt next to redhaired duo, she extended a hand
down. "Y'all still wanna come?"

All three girls cast a glance to the side where the hefty panda had somehow worked his way
around to be topside up and was creeping away on fingers and toes without having untied his
bonds.

"Groww...urk!" A certain panda found a length of rope had just settled across his neck and gone
taut.

"Huh?!" The redheads' gazes followed the taut length of rope, back to their really bizarrely clad
rescuer. "What the?" Ranma-chan sputtered.

"Don't worry there, pardner!" The girl tied the rope's end to the saddle, then leapt off to land on
the panda's head, grabbing his ears and quickly tying the muzzle shut. "This here little doggie's not
gonna cause y'all any problems now!"

"Uhm..." Ranma-chan said, not at *all* sure how to interpret this.

"How'd you learn to do that?" Asked her redhaired partner, now decently dressed again.

"Say, pardners, would y'all be adverse to me taking this here problem up to the Ranch?" Akane
finished tying down the panda. Special Manuever: Tie Me Kangaroo Down! - Old West Martial
Arts technique that causes the ropes to get tighter the more the victim struggles.

Ranma twitched. "Ranch? In Tokyo? Errr. What's a ranch?"

"A farm for raising animals." Whispered her gorgeous companion aside to her, then looked back
to their rescuer, obviously struggling hard to think of words. "Um, howdy!"

Akane gave that girl a neighborly nod, then picked up her hat from where it had fallen. That was
HER Stetson, after all. Wouldn't do to have some panda roll over and flatten it.

"Grub?" Ranma-chan was still trying to puzzle this out. Sure, she'd eaten bugs when they had
nothing else, but people did that when they had a choice??

The pretty girl was eyeing the tied up crowd warily, and seemed nervous they might get loose.
The fact that many of them were chewingly actively on the rope that bound them didn't help her
any.

"Growf?" The panda was a little puzzled that the ropes weren't coming off. The last time he'd run
into knots like this had been... the Master. Oh dear.

"Vittles, dinner, food, don't ya know," Akane supplied. "Y'all look like ya been on the trail a long
time, so come along and I'll set y'all a place at the table. Get outta this rain too!"

"Sounds good to me." The gorgeous redhead offered.

"Growf?! (Did someone mention food?) Growf! (Waitaminute we cannot spare a moment in
reuniting the houses!)"

"Food?" Ranma blinked, realizing she could put off her father's plans for awhile. Ranma found
herself smiling back at the western girl. "What kind of food?"

------------

Soun fidgited. "Where are they?"

"Are you sure they're going to be here today, Daddy?" Nabiki straightened her kimono for what
seemed like the thousandth time.

"Well, that is, I mean..."

Kasumi straightened up. "Father, I'm going to change clothes and finish dinner."

Nabiki drummed her fingers on the table. "So where's Akane? Tending the herd?" ~Well at least
that means that 'Sabre Mars' isn't active today. The gangs are trying to lay traps still.~

Soun nodded. "Errr..."

Nabiki got up as well. "I'm going to change clothes too, Daddy. Maybe they got delayed or they
had enough sense to get out of this cold rain."

Soun didn't think it sounded like Genma.

------------

Akane started setting plates in front of the redhaired girl, who began drooling. That other girl had
excused herself and gone on out back to the Necessary.

An older fellow sitting nearby nodded at Ranma. "That Akane sure knows how to rustle up some
vittles, don't she?"

"Mmmmmfmmmph?" Ranma asked with a stuffed mouth.

"Aw, Kreiger, y'all know ah'm not a shadow on my big sister!" Akane got a wicked gleam in her
eyes. "Say, what y'all think about that bear..."

"Growf?!" The panda went from drooling and tugging at the stake he was chained to, to a rather
alarmed expression.

"Why, Akane, I've never showed you but there are 101 uses for bear fat!" Kreiger twirled his
handlebar moustache and eyed the bear speculatively.

"Not to mention bear jerky - ah've heard it's *quite* savory," added Akane.

"And a pandaskin rug would be really nice," continued Kreiger.

"Mmmmffff," said Ranma, mouth still full as she tried to inhale a huge meal.

"Akane, I would not have believed it had I not seen it. Someone with worse table manners than
you!" Kreiger smiled at his student's discomfort.

"That's beef stew, actually," Akane said to Ranma. "Figured y'all weren't ready for my Volcanic
Mars Chili. Oh, and that there's mashed potatoes, them's greens, and that's steak. Ah ain't that up
on the finer aspects but this simple fare's easy enough. Now my sister Kasumi, on the other hand,
is a gourmet and she's up on all sorts of Japanese dishes."

"Mmmmrffff?!" Ranma said. It sure beat Oyaji's cooking. And this girl's sister was a *better*
cook?!

"Oh, and y'all gonna want something to wash that down with. We got java, but since this here's a
*Japanese* cattle ranch, ah thought y'all might prefer some tea." Akane started pouring into some
battered tin cups. "Sorry it ain't as good as Kasumi could manage, but it'll do fer now eh?"

"Mrrff?"

"Uhm, girl, ya might wanna chew once in awhile." Akane blinked at the continued prodigious rate
of consumption, and was gratified when Ranma began slowing down. "And actually, no, it's just a
fairly cheap genmai (brown rice) tea. It washes the vittles down nicely. Hey, what's yer name,
anyway? Can't just keep callin' ya 'girl' or 'kid'."

Ranma swallowed and took a deep breath. "Ranma Saotome."

"Oh, just like *the* Ranma Saotome, eh?" Akane nodded. "Well, that's kinda cool. Are you any
relation to *the* Ranma?"

The redhead blinked. "THE Ranma Saotome."

"That's the feller who's engaged to your big sister, ain't it?" Kreiger grinned briefly. "Hell, he must
be a *real* man from what I've heard!"

Akane nodded and moseyed over to where a branding iron was sitting in a fire. "Yup. Though ah
hear his father's a real idjit."

"Growf!" The panda protested.

"Engaged him to more'n a dozen girls," Akane said, turning the metal stick around.

"Growf? (Was it that many?)"

"Dumped him repeatedly in a pit of cats," continued Akane, "taught him a lot of things that
weren't right."

"Well, *that's* accurate," mumbled Ranma, eyeing her father and wondering how many fiancees
there really was.

"Why, ah just been in contact with a little gal named 'Okonomiyaki Ucchan' about that daddy of
his." Akane inspected the red glowing end of the iron.

"GROWF?!" Which in panda-speak meant something like "This sounds like a good time to go
back to China."

"Okonomiyaki Ucchan," puzzled Ranma for a moment. "But... he's a guy..."

"Nah, turns out she's a bit of a tomboy. Oh, and she was engaged to Ranma when they were
younger. Wild, huh?"

Ranma was staring at the panda. "...yeah, wild...."

Akane smiled, stepped into place behind the panda, and slammed the hot end home just to the side
of a fuzzy little tail.

------------

"Aw, c'mon Mara! What kind of help is that?"

The demoness shrugged. "The kind I could give. I'm a *demon*, curses are the best that I could
do to hide you. You're lucky you only have to share Ranma's curse. I *could* have done Genma's
or Ryoga's." She sidled up nice and close. "And you were fortunate you had that suggestion
power."

The gorgeous redhead talking to the demoness out behind the outhouse glanced around shiftily.
"Yeah, only now that's flatlined, and my glamour that keeps me looking less outrageously
attractive than I am wore out and now I'm too weak to replace it... This is NOT a good time to be
a girl! I've got so many abilities out of whack I couldn't even catch that fleeing panda Ranma calls
a father," she grumbled.

"Much as I dislike being in that damn ball, you'd better not leave me out too long. Akane there is
sufficiently talented that she can sense the presence of spirits and demons and the like." Mara
frowned and looked off towards the campfire. "Though it looks like you missed Genma getting
the business end of a branding iron."

The redhead sniffled. "I missed that? I wonder if I could get it on video tape?"

"I'd think so," Mara said with a grin. "So he's got the brand of the Rocking Fist Ranch on his butt
from the famed Red Rider."

"Well... I guess that means I've got to go back. Mara, return!"

--------

Ranma-j backed up and found someone had put a wall there. Hmmm. Turning, he noticed there
was someone's belt there. His eyes tracked up, catching a chin.

BIG. Solid-looking. "Oh my."

"Plenty Bull," informed Akane at both Ranma's expressions. "Practices the ancient style of Martial
Arts: Indian Wrestling. You know, the one where there's a buffalo born at the same time as the
child, and every day the child picks up and carries the buffalo. Plenty Bull got twins."

"Unnnnnn," grunted Plenty Bull, surprised and pleased that Akane remembered him that well.

"You here for our rematch, eh?" Akane chambered and stood ready. "Well, i'm ready!"

"Unnnnnn," disagreed the massive giant.

"No..." Akane relaxed slightly. "Then what *are* you here for?"

"Unnnnnn," explained Plenty Bull, then turned and walked away.

"Well, thanks, but i *know* Black Bart is gonna try something." Akane sighed, then caught the
curious looks from both Ranmas. "Oh, Black Bart is a practictioner and Heir to Martial Arts:
Stage Villainry. Favorite manuever is the Snively Whiplash. He's got a dozen Thieves he's
recruited to be flunkies. Don't worry about it, one of the weaknesses of his style is that he's gotta
wait for suitably dramatic moments to unleash his plans."

"Why?" Ranma-native asked.

Ranma-Jared and Akane answered at the same time. "Because... it's the Code Of The West."

============
Jabberworks Basic Pickup Truck
Crew: 1 driver and 1 passenger (two if they're small or very friendly)
Maximum Speed: 75mph (120kph)
Engine: gas or electric
Maximum range: 150 miles (240km)
Length: 12ft Width: 5ft
Weight: 1 ton (approximate)
MDC by location: Tires 5 each (4)
Main Body 45
General market cost: 6,000 credits if new. older models with some damage can run as little as 500
credits.
Weapons: comes with none
this is the VW Bug (old style) of the New West. Customization of these vehicles is a big thing
in some circles, others prefer their trucks to look battered and well-used but still add upgrades.
Common upgrades: better armor, hover system, covered bed, weapon emplacements, anti-theft
systems, full environmental, hydraulic bed, mechanic's bay (small crane, tool chests, generator),
remote signaller (extendable transmitter tower and transciever), front winch, nuclear or other
engine replacement.
Rimshot's has extra large gastanks (increasing the range to 300mi), the front winch, full
environmental (cabin), and better armor (MDC 90). The TW enhancements are Chameleon,
Armor (50 MDC), Mystic Alarm, Cleansing System, and Dispel Magic Barriers. The front winch
has an anchor with a TW modification of Sticky (like a Carpet Of Adhesion).

===========