Slam Dunk Fan Fiction ❯ Emotions: Broken Circle ❯ Prologue ( Prologue )

Emotions


He's not cold...just aloof.

He's not uncaring...just unmindful.

He's not a bastard...he just didn't respond nicely most of the time.

And he's not a god.

No, never that.

No matter what all those girls tell me, he's not a god, a demi-god or an angel or anything else but human. He's human and that's what I see him as.

He's good at basketball; I can't deny that, or that that he is exceptionally good-looking and attractive. I can't deny that almost all the girls are in love with him.

And I can't deny that I'm one of them.

But I can deny that I am one of his fan girls. I've known him - no - known of him since Jr. High. We went to the same school together then and we are now going to the same high school together now.

I didn't fall in love with him on first sight, and I didn't fall in love with him when I first saw him play basketball. I didn't see him as a sex god, nor did I see him as a star.

I don't know how or when I fell in love with him, but in the end, I just did.

And I don't want to be.

I don't want to be in love with him. I didn't then and I don't now.

I hadn't been looking for a relationship, though I doubt he would have even given me a second thought.

He was just a classmate, a boy classmate, but a classmate nonetheless. He was the star of the basketball team, the most sought after guy in school and also the most popular guy, weather he knew it or not. But I didn't give him any special attention.

I'd go up to him and ask him for notes if he had any, work with him as a partner for a project when we were assigned together and paid politely and common courtesy to him.

I didn't drool, or scream, or squeal, or go up in flames whenever he came around. I had simply did not like him like that, or so I had thought. It wasn't until the last months of the last year of Jr. High that I realized I did have feelings for him.

And not just any old feelings, it was love.

I loved him.

And I didn't like it one bit.

After that, things changed. I avoided him, spent as little time in his company as possible, stopped going to all the places that he might have been (even if it was my favorite spot of the school), my heart would pound whenever he came near and just the smallest, tiniest, and almost unnoticeable blush appeared on my cheeks when I saw him.

Things changed for me, but I doubt he even noticed.

I had never really been friends with him and we didn't run with the same crowd. I mean, yeah, basketball is cool and all, but I don't really have a big interest in it.

Yet I went to all my school games.

My friends noticed the change that he didn't, and told me what futile feelings they were. He was known to break five hearts a day, mine would be no different.

And I knew that, how much I knew that. My heart ached everyday because I loved him, and I didn't want to love. He would never return my feelings; he had no interest in girls or anything else but basketball.

I assured my friends I wasn't planning on doing anything or that I wanted anything from him.

I just wanted to see the games.

My friends relented in the end and I even talked them into letting me go alone to all of them.

I must have looked really weird; all the girls were in one section over on somewhere cheering ridiculously loud for one star on the court, and me, in the middle of a bunch of guys. But nobody complained.

The girls were happy for less competition and the guys were happy to see at least one girl not crazy for the star of the basketball team.

Nobody ever realized that my eyes were fixed on only that one person during the entire game.

No I'm not ugly or hideous or ridiculously fat.

I have long black hair that reached my waist, brown eyes, full strawberry lips, and creamy white skin. You know, the usual that comes with Asian descents. I'm pretty, but not beautiful, just the kind of girl you see everyday with a crowd of friends and the one you meet that you think are nice. Not so plain that your eyes just pass right through her, but not so beautiful that she instantly draws your attention. Nothing extraordinary, just everyday normal girl, nothing that really stands out.

I passed the last few months of Jr. high noticing the things he did and at the same time, trying desperately to ignore him.

We graduated and I spent the summer vacation, pushing him out of my mind and trying my best to get on with my life. And I succeeded too, I had a great summer and I even meet some guys.

But once school started again, every else did too. He had never been able to go long without getting noticed. And once the basketball season rolled in, everything picked up again. He got onto the team and was widely praised, he picked up his own fan group and cheering squad and was soon again noticed to be one of the most popular and sought after guys in school.

And I went to all of the games again.

The summer away, it seemed, did nothing about my feelings for him.

But I noticed someone else on the team as well.

Sakuragi, wasn't it?

Sure he did make a fool out of himself a lot of time, made stupid comments about other players, challenged others to piontless battles with him and was the mortal enemy of Rukawa, but he caught my attention.

His silly antics made me laugh and his words inspired confidence to the team. He made himself stand out, and I looked up at him for that.

He wasn't all that good-looking but he was cute. He behaved like a kid, innocently naïve to the point of almost stupidity. But I liked him, no, not in the crushy-oh-my-god-he's-cute way, just as in person-to-person way.

He's in my history class, and even though he's said to be part of a vicious gang, I can't really see him like that. He's nice and very funny, and I think maybe I could like him in the 'crushy-oh-my-god-he's-cute way'.

Maybe my feelings for Rukawa are finally fading.

~~~~~~~~

She closed the journal that was settled on her lap and breathed out a sigh. She searched her school bag for an elastic band, and when she found it, she tied her loose waist length black hair into a low ponytail at her nape. Having that done she put her journal into her school bag and got up from underneath the cherry tree she had been sitting under for shade. {Whew! 3 and a half page, a lot for one day, but it's nice to get everything off my chest finally.} She thought and smiled at her herself. {There may be hope for me yet.}

She looked around for her friends and waved back at them across the field of the schoolyard as she saw their moving arms in the air. She walked towards them but soon picked up her pace and started to run as she heard them shout for her to hurry up. She gave a laugh as they called her a slowpoke.

It was too bad that during her run across the schoolyard she wasn't looking out for on-coming vehicles, because the next thing she knew, she was hit by a bicycle and was rolling on the ground with some extra weight.

She blinked dazedly in confusion when she felt the tumbling finally come to a stop and felt a heavy weight pleasantly pushing down on her. She blinked at her hands in front of her, braced on a very muscular chest and looked up to see drowsy blue eyes staring down at her.

{Or maybe not.}

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Hiaosbi: Please review! Would anyone want me to continue this? I kinda wrote it on the spur of the moment....