Beyblade Fan Fiction ❯ You Wouldn't Know Love ❯ Hey Jude ( Chapter 5 )

Chapter~5: Hey Jude

 

“...Hey, Jude! Don't let her down
You have found her, now go and get her
Remember, to let her into your heart
Then you can start to make it better...”

 

Notes: Beyblade isn't mine. “Hey Jude” is, though... Yeah, right. I WISH. It's really Lennon and the gang's. They're so lucky... And “You Wouldn't Know Love” isn't mine either, so stop rubbing it in my face, okay? Leilani is mine and, if anyone is willing to pay a dollar for her, I might even sell her and create myself another one... Just kidding, I wouldn't do that to my little people; they make my stories happen! But, since I've seen it before, I want to say that, if anyone were to want her, seriously, I would lend the girl, but she remains MINE and, before you take her away, at least ask me permission please, though I doubt anyone would want her anyways... I'm such a grumbler (I doubt that word exists)... Again, thanks to anyone that has read up to here. On with the show.

 

`Don't weep in public. Don't weep in public. Don't weep in public...' Leilani repeated to herself as her own holy mantra, trying to summon strength through words. At simple sight, one could easily notice how tense she was, trying to avoid crying. Her hands were clamped tight into fists at her sides, she was biting her lower lip hard and she would blink every few seconds, even though the tears would form again and irritate her green eyes.

`He doesn't deserve being cried for. This is all HIS fault...' She thought bitterly, failing in her introspection as she remembered all the years she had spent with the boy. `Fine! If you can't help but cry, at least wait until you're not in public and then go share all your sorrows with-... with whom? HE was your confidant. HE was with whom you sobbed and mourned... Why did he have to do this?... Get a grip girl! Take a deep breath and calm down,' she was having inner turmoils trying to control all of her emotions at once. She was furious, depressed, relieved he was far enough for her to hold onto her sanity and hurt for all that had happened now and in the farthest of her dark past.

She absently pulled her arms to hug herself softly, it wasn't cold, but she needed some sort of comfort.

`I pressured him too much... maybe it was my fault in the end, after all,' she thought while lowering her head softly.

The young, mournful brunette walked at a steady pace towards the airport. She knew it would've been a bit quicker to go by cab or take a minibus, but she wanted to breathe fresh air before she left Rome for the last time. She loved the place, it was gorgeous and peaceful, but the memories she knew it would bring if she ever returned would be anything but pleasant. Besides the fact that she at least wanted to remember some sites of the city, something had told her to take her time and linger outdoors before she got onto a crammed up airplane for six hours.

`I love him too much... I only wanted to know if he loved me, all I asked him for was one demonstration. I should've known that he couldn't manage, he doesn't have his heart on his sleeve. I pushed him too far, expecting a reply and all went downhill because of that. Damn I'm so stupid!' she cursed herself as she hit her forehead with her palm soft enough to not make it hurt.

It was pointless now to ponder whose fault it was. Everything had ended and she was alone again. She would just have to subside and forget everything that had been or could have been.

But, she couldn't avoid blaming herself for the painful situation.

She knew Kai better than anyone else did. She KNEW that she was asking for too much from him. He had been adapted to his self-reservation since they were children. He couldn't go around forcing himself to feel something he simply didn't feel. And, now, more than ever in her life, she was sure that Kai had never felt anything for her aside of a sibling-like affection. She was, now, sure that he had only wanted her near him -when he'd asked her to go steady, as uncharacteristical as it had been in him- because she was the closest thing he had to a sister. She had suspected it from the start and had futilely coerced herself to push the thought to a side as a simple insecurity, common in any relationship.

She had messed everything up so much.

She should just have accepted the affection Kai undoubtedly offered her and let it linger there. But, she hadn't. And now the only one that was profoundly hurt was herself for allowing such foolishness as hope for love from someone who had never received it take over her rational side. She should NEVER have let herself grow this dependant of Kai Hiwatari in her life...

 

Kai rushed silently down the irritatingly overpopulated streets in search of Leilani. He could feel other people's gazes on him as he passed and his cheeks burned despite himself. He didn't care if anyone was watching him; that wasn't at matter for the moment. He would ponder it later.

`Where IS she?' he asked himself, a bit nervously as he kept his brisk pace towards Leilani's destination. He HAD to find her and prove to her that he DID love her. He didn't want her to hurt. He hadn't meant to make her believe that he didn't care. He had just been too shocked after hearing her so coldly declare that she was leaving to stop her and assure her that she was wrong. That he loved her and that things COULD return to normal.

He had been an idiot. An insensitive jerk that had needed someone else to point his flaws out for him.

But, now, he was determined to change everything. He was going to make his relationship work. He was going to ask for forgiveness even if it meant getting down on his knees and begging. And he had already taken a LONG step. He only hoped Leilani wasn't too tired and frustrated to accept his apologies.

He had thought about taking a cab to the airport, but he honestly doubted anyone would let him get into their car in his present state. One of those touristic mini buses had also formed part of his original plan, but, as with the taxi, it was out of reach. Besides, he hadn't brought his wallet and transportation doesn't come free when you're a tourist. He solely felt, for some reason, that taking a bus wasn't his best option. That feeling that kept him constantly attached to Leilani seemed to be screaming the way to him. Basically unaware as to what or why, also, for some reason, his legs were leading him, albeit his mind was conscious that it would be faster through other streets.

Between the several crowds of people that were strolling around the streets window-shopping or simply breathing fresh air, Kai managed to make out the unmistakable telltale sign of the long braid that swung dully behind his destiny.

Of course, he hadn't a clue how he had managed to find the girl, after all, as he had found out mere hours before, Rome is HUGE. But that wasn't the matter. He had to get her attention.

He hesitated for a moment. That was one of those habits that were simply ingrained. Words were NOT his strong point, along with emotions. But that wasn't going to be enough remonstration to stop him from completing his self-proclaimed mission.

He was too stubborn to let habits get to him.

Kai Hiwatari, totally uncharacteristically, opened his mouth and let all restrained emotions free.

“Everyone that's listening, see that girl over there?! The one with the long, black braid! The most wonderful person walking the streets! Now you know who I mean?!”

 

Leilani could almost hear Kai's deep voice actually making out those wonderful words. She wondered why she was tormenting herself so badly by daydreaming of what could have been, or, rather than that, what she WISHED could have been. She wished so badly that it were true. She needed Kai now, more than ever. She missed him so badly...

 

“Well, now, that you know, I have something to tell! I, Kai Hiwatari, love her more than anything or anyone and I do NOT want her to leave! I've been a total ass,” Kai paused and blushed at that statement, “with her! I treated her horribly and am as sorry as I can get! I'll do ANYTHING to get her to forgive me! I LOVE HER!” he declared as loud as he could manage. He knew he was probably humiliating himself by doing this, but it was his last option to fix things out.

He noticed that he had already captured the attention of a great deal of people. Some girls `oo-ed' and `aww-ed' at his statements while some men and boys frowned their disapproval at Kai's actions. He didn't care, of course. The person he was directing all of this to was, seemingly, too distracted to hear.

“Leilani Specter, I LOVE YOU!” Kai felt how intensely his blush kept on heating his cheeks and fought to continue against his teachings. “I'M SO SORRY FOR EVERYTHING! DON'T LEAVE, PLEASE!” Leilani didn't seem to care about what Kai was professing, because she kept her pace and didn't falter even once.

Kai frowned. Could it be that Leilani had given up on him?

 

`Stop making things up, Leilani! Stop it! He's NOT coming to get you and he is NOT yelling all those things! Stop hurting yourself, you dumbass!' Leilani hardly ever resorted to cursing even the smallest bit. It went against her manners and all the teachings she had ever received at all those ladies' boarding schools she had gone to. But, right now, she was too depressed to even care. Her mind kept on making her imagine Kai's voice yelling out everything that she wanted to hear from him. Of course, it had to be just an illusion. An escape from what she really was going through.

She had never considered herself weak. She never had thought it would hurt her this badly to end with a boyfriend. Boys pass. That was her psychology. But, it hurt deeply. Because she wasn't just losing a boyfriend. She was losing her friend and soul mate as well.

Her friend. She pondered that and finally took realization of the fact that, not only was she breaking up with Kai, but she was ending all types of relationships she held in the entire group. She wouldn't have Ray or Hillary to resort to now that everything was over with Kai. She wouldn't have Max to joke with. She wouldn't have Kenny to enjoy his intellectual conversations. And she wouldn't have Tyson and Daichi to watch quarreling. She was tearing apart from the family she had established.

 

“LEILANI, STOP IGNORING ME! LEILANI, PLEASE!”

 

It was pointless. She couldn't shut that voice out of her mind. She'd just allow herself to keep on daydreaming, if it meant it would help her get through the pain of the moment.

“LEILANI, I KNOW I WAS AN IDIOT, BUT CAN YOU PLEASE FORGIVE ME?!” that was somewhat similar to what she had always had in mind, although maybe a bit out of character for Kai. Leilani let the dreamy smile that tugged at her lips form with the voice she heard in her mind.

After some moments, Leilani became aware of the fact that a lot of people were watching her as she walked by. A few teenaged girls, probably about her age or maybe a bit older, would point at her and look behind her at something, giggle at whatever they saw and return their looks at her to glare impatiently. That made her feel awkward. Men and boys nearby frowned at something behind her, then smiled at the young girl for no apparent reason, nodding at the brunette.

Leilani began to feel like something in display from the circus. She wasn't extremely fond of being the center of attention. That was one of the great reasons why she hid behind Kai most of the time. Sure, she was out and open with her emotions, but, with strangers, she was rather shy. Especially if those strangers pointed fingers at her and began to whisper things as she walked by.

She picked up her pace a bit, trying to avoid the people's stares. She absently raised a hand to her face to check if she had anything on it. Nothing, of course. Throughout the entire while, Kai's voice in her mind kept on shouting at her to stop and wait for him.

She crossed by a couple of cops. One seemed to be in his mid-thirties, probably with a family and a kid of her age, and was also frowning at something behind Leilani. The other seemed a bit younger and simply looked furious. Both exchanged glances with Leilani and gave her assuring smiles as they pulled away from the wall they were leaning against and nodded nonchalantly at the puzzled girl as they walked past her, towards whatever it was that everyone seemed to look at.

Leilani didn't want to turn around to see. She knew that, if she did, before she knew it, she'd be walking straight to the hotel room to try to fix things with Kai. She could see herself on her knees begging and got furious with herself for valuing someone that hardly cared for her that much.

Suddenly, abruptly, the voice in her mind ceased calling to her to forgive him. “Let go of me, you jackasses! She's my GIRLFRIEND and I'm NOT sexually harassing her!” That was NOT what Leilani would have imagined in her mind. It sounded too real, yet it couldn't be... Right?

Right.

Leilani dared herself a glance backwards, almost nervous as to what she might see.

 

A.N.: This chapter was rather short, but I had to cut up my story to fit it in, so, this is what was left. Kai was SO OOC and I'm so sorry for him for that, but that's the way it's supposed to be. I wish my boyfriend would do that for me [stares dreamily at the artificial stars glued to her ceiling]... Anyhow, write to me and tell me how much you hated or loved Kai's new attitude: Sappyre3@hotmail.com.