Crossover With Non-anime Series Fan Fiction / Crossover Fan Fiction ❯ Cannonball Run 3 World Tour ❯ Australia ( Chapter 4 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Chapter 4


'Been a cop long?' Dom Deluise in 'Cannonball Run'.

"QUIET!!!!!!!!!!" Baby Herman shouted to pipe down the Cannonball Band.

"Listen. We've been waiting two hours for this. Now tell me where the hell the Manta is!" Said Tom Jones.

"Forgte that!" Mariah Carey shoved the man out of her way. "What the hell happened to the Shadow Stalker?"

"Hey! My brothers and I need to know where our Condor is…!" Cried Michael Jackson while his brothers tried to support him.

"Okay, okay." Benny looked at the board to see who was winning so far. "Let's see now………."

"Welcome again! This is Bosley speaking in New York, fresh as a daisy!"

"It's been a while since the Cannonballers had left USA. They're now currently making their way through Australia." Said Gennai.

"I'm pretty surprised they're still at it, after all the hassle through America!" Ryo said.

"Jigglypuff! Jigglypuff! Jigglypuff!"

"What did Jigglypuff say this time, Misty?" Asked Gennai.

"Well, guys. Jigglypuff said that all of our lucky racers are now approaching the city of Sydney."

"Well, isn't that a coincidence?" Said Bosley.

"Why's that?"

"Because, guys, live in Sydney, we have TV's Jay Leno, along with Conker and Berri the squirrels reporting for us in the flesh!" Everyone turned back at the large monitor screen.

"Hey, guys!" Jay Leno waved.

"Hiya! What's going on?" Conker smiled. "Look, Berri! We're on TV!"

"Huh, whatever!" Berri crossed her arms.

"So, guys. Seen any Cannonballers yet?"

"What can I say, but no?" Jay chuckled.

"Jay, if I may, I have to admit," Conker said. "If you thought America was crazy over this race, you should hear the guys around here!"

"Yeah, I mean, like, it's almost insane!" Berri added.

"Wow. That's some pretty heavy stuff." Said Gennai.

"Well anyway, guys. We'll get back to you when our racers arrive!" The three of them made one last farewell before the screen went black.

"There you have it, people, let's just hope the Cannonballers can make it through down under!" Said Misty.

"Until then, this is Bosley!"

"I'm Gennai!"

"I'm Misty!"


"And I'm Ryo!"

"Over and out!" They all said.

'Dealers keep dealing.

Thieves keep thieving.

Whores keep whoring.

Junkies keep scoring.

Trade is on the meat rack.

Strip joints full of hunchbacks.

Bitches keep bitching.

Claps just keep itching.

Ain't no use praying,

That's the way it's staying, baby.

Johnny ain't so crazy,

He's always got a line for the ladies.

Get your rocks off,

Get your rocks off, honey.

Shake it now, now,

Get 'em off down town.

Get your rocks off,

Get your rocks off, honey.

Skake it now, now,

Get 'em off down town.

Creeps keep crawling.

Drunks keep falling.

Teasers keep teasing.

Holy Joes are preaching.

Cops keep busting.

Hustlers keep hustling.

Death keeps on knocking.

Souls are up for auction.

Ain't no use praying,

That's the way it's staying, baby.

Johnny ain't so crazy,

He's always got a line for the ladies.

Get your rocks off,

Get your rocks off, honey.

Shake it now, now,

Get 'em off down town.

Get your rocks off,

Get your rocks off, honey.

Skake it now, now,

Get 'em off down town.

Ain't no use praying,

That's the way it's staying, baby.

Johnny ain't so crazy,

He's always got a line for the ladies.

Get your rocks off,

Get your rocks off, honey.

Shake it now, now,

Get 'em off down town.

Get your rocks off,

Get your rocks off, honey.

Skake it now, now,

Get 'em off down town.

Get your rocks off,

Get your rocks off, honey.

Get your rocks off,

Get your rocks off, honey.

Get your rocks off,

Get your rocks off, honey.

Get your rocks off,

Get your rocks off, honey.

Get your rocks off,

Get your rocks off, honey.

Get your rocks off,

Get your rocks off, honey.'

'Rocks' By Primal Scream.


Somewhere in the Pacific Ocean, near the continent, Alan Tracy was navigating Thunderbird 3 back to HQ while his other friends were happily spending their vacation in the US.

"Why me?" Said Alan. "Why do they always have to leave me in charge of everything?"

Meanwhile, Snoopy took no notice of the red rocket ship in front of him.

"Um, Snoops." Rockey the rooster looked out of the window.

"Snoopy?" Said Rocky the squirrel.

"You're heading right for that red……thing………" Bullwinkle pointed. "You're not going to………" He was now in fear.

Snoopy had nodded his head. He was going to ram it.

"OH NO!!!!!!!!!!" Cried Roy.

"LOOK OUT!" Shouted Siegfired before everyone apart from the white beagle ducked for protection. The Meteor drove right through the Thunderbird 3, making it flip and spin uncontrollably in the air. Snoopy laughed away.

"This is why I never like to travel during the holidays!" Said Alan Tracy.


"HEY! OVER HERE!" Robinson Crusoe waved his arms like a maniac at the Meteor. "SOS! SOS!"

Snoopy saw the ship wrecker and stuck his tongue out at him in rudeness.

"Please! You gotta help me…….oh……….they're gone…"

"It's a good thing we switched places, Roger." Eddie was now driving the Ratfang. "You deserve the rest after all the things we went through back in the US."

"Thanks Eddie." Roger lied back onto Jessica's lap at the back of the car. Dolores sat in front with Eddie.

"So, Eddie, how long until we reach Sydney?" Dolores asked.

"About half an hour more."

"Oh, look, Roger! Kangaroos!" Jessica watched the hopping mammals outside on the desert.

"OH! This I gotta see!" Roger leaped up and stuck his face into the glass window.

"I didn't know you were so interested in kangaroos, Roger." Said Dolores.

"Oh! I just love them! The way they hop, the way they carry their precious babies in their pouches. Hoo! Hoo!" Roger couldn't stop taking his eyes off the kangaroos outside. A familiar siren noise from behind suddenly let itself out. "Eddie?"

"Yeah, Roger?"

"When could kangaroos screech like a police siren?"

Jessica suddenly looked back at the flashing red lights of trouble from behind.

"You better hurry up, Eddie. We wouldn't want to let you-know-who catch us!" She said.

"Quickly, Eddie." Said Dolores.

"I'm on it." Eddie slammed the pedal with his foot and the Ratfang made its way into the hot sunshine in Sydney.

"Can't hit me!" Action Man stuck his tongue out at Evel Knievel who tried all his effort to catch ahead of him.

"Okay, Action Man, you asked for it!" Evel said. At that moment he pushed a button on his belt. Two arm cannons attached themselves to his arms and large red missiles appeared from the back of his backpack.

"OOH! I'm scared!" Said Action Man sarcastically as he took out his metallic crossbow and explosive arrows.

"Take this!" Evel shot out a red missile. Action Man for a second panicked as the missile flew just past him and unfortunately, hit the Thunderbird 3 in the distance.

"Missed me!" Action Man having got a hold of himself. The two flew off in battle while Alan Tracy was left to evacuate out of the red rocket with a parachute.

"I said it before and I'll say it again. I never like to travel during the holidays!" But just when he thought he was safe on water when he landed on the sea, sharks revealed their fins from the surface. "OH SHIT!" Alan Tracy swam for his life and away from the hungry fish hot on his paddling feet. "MOMMY!"

It didn't take him long to reach a nearby island. Though after throwing himself on the island, all tired out, a familiar friend stood by him.

"WELL! WELL! WELL!" Robinson Crusoe tapped his foot. "So it's you! What a surprise to find Mr. Alan Tracy here! The only person who's been ignoring my calls for the last few years!"

"NO! You don't understand! PLEASE!" Alan pleaded. "I was only kidding with you!"

"HA! A likely story! You weren't nice to me! So I'm not going to be nice to you!" Robinson picked up Alan and threw him back into the sea. "GET OFF MY ISLAND!"


The sharks were already waiting to feast on him.

"You sure know your stuff. Mr. Yoruba!" Wally Gator was the driver of the Rattler. "Nothing's been stopping us thanks to your cleverness!"

"You've outsmarted every cop so far!" Said Snagglepuss.

"To win a race, you have to be prepared." Yoruba crossed his arms. "And now, I think it is the right time to split apart."

"You mean…you want us to take out the Rattler 2?" Top Cat trembled. "But what'll we do without you when you're on that boat?"

"Don't worry, my friends. If you have to determination to win, you will find your way."

"We're doomed." Wally Gator mumbled as stopped by the seashore.

In seconds, the Rattler 2 boat was shot onto the sea.


"Sharky! Look up there!" George shook his friend. "That boat must be doing 140 by the speed it's going at!"

"Your absolutely right, George! Let's pull that thing over right now!"

Sharky turned on his mini submarine and rose up to the surface. Soon they were hot on Yoruba's trail.

"FOLKS!" Said Stanley Stupid. "We've reached Sydney at last!"


Kitty and Xylophone were obviously not so excited…scared was more like it…whatever more disasters could this family make?

"Though I wonder…" Stanley thought. "What happened to Australia?"

"I'm not sure, honey." Said his wife. "Maybe we passed it."

"Aw, shucks!"

"You see them anywhere?" Meowth looked down onto the city searching for the Ratfang.

"Oh, who cares about them, Meowth?" Said Jesse, "As long as we're ahead of them they can't stand a chance against us."

"Let's focus more on winning this race!" Said James.

"YEAH! TEAM ROCKET ALL THE WAY!" They all shouted. Jesse however let her hands go off the control when she raised her fists high into the ceiling with the others.

"JESSE!!!!! DON'T LET GO!!!!!!!!" Meowth shouted in fright when he saw that the Switchblade plane was heading right into the Sydney Opera House just ahead of them. Jesse immediately got back to the controls and steered the Switchblade away just in time.

"What are you trying to do, Jesse?! GIVE ME A HEART ATACK!!!!!!!!"

"SHUT UP, JAMES!" Jesse screamed at the blue headed fool. But when Jesse's back was turned Meowth pointed again in fear.

"LOOK OUT!!!!!!!!!!" Jesse turned around to face a giant commercial sign board. And this time there was no time to turn.

"YAAAAAAAAA HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Hence they crashed right through the 'Steven Irwin' sign that had a large picture of the crocodile hunter himself. Once the Switchblade went past there was nothing left of the sign but a large hole gaping out.

"CRIKEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Steve Irwin saw his own commercial sign get wreaked in front of his eyes. He shook his fist furiously at the Switchblade that flew off. "You're gonna pay for what you've done! How dare you insult the crocodile hunter himself! Come back here!" Baron Samedi began to tap Steve's shoulder. It didn't look as if he was in a laughing mood, when he and the others saw that the Barracuda was heading right into a thin alleyway. Even worse, they happened to be chased by angry sirens.

"Um…….Steve." Said Alf at the back.

"(Watch where you're going!)" Said Kourikou.

"Watch your way!" Said Baron Samedi. Steve Irwin looked forwards and gasped at the sight of the alleyway. It looked as if they were at a dead end.

"What are we gonna do?" Said Alf.

"Hold on! Steve's got an idea up in his head!" Steve accelerated his bike and aimed right into the alleyway itself. Everyone else closed their eyes as he drove right into the path and out the other end. The police cars crashed into the wall together at the same time.

"HA! HA! HAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!" Baron Samedi took off his top hat and waved at the cops from behind. Everyone sighed and Steve drove past the other cars on the road.

"(This can only happen in Australia!)" Thought Kirikou.


"NO! I'LL TAKE THE MONEY, LOG LOVER!" Mrs. Twit answered back.

They had driving Dr. Strangefate bananas since the start of the race. It didn't look like he was going to take it any longer, especially when he was the pilot.

"Will you two shut up for once?!" Strangefate yelled. "We'll all share the money equally. Okay? End of story!"

"Don't blame me, he's the one who started it." Mrs. Twit said.

"No! You were the one who started it!" Mr. Twit contradicted.


It was only a few miles more before Duke Nukem was to reach Sydney. He drove the Vampire along the road. But then he stopped when his eyes caught sight of a blonde woman by the road. She blew a kiss at him and Duke raised his brow.

"Why, hello, there." He said.

"Hello yourself." Said Pamela Anderson.

"You need a ride to Sydney?"

"Sure do."

"Don't forget me." Rupaul suddenly stepped out from behind Pamela.

"And me too." Eddie Izzard as he stepped out the other way.

"OH NO! NOT THESE GUYS! THIS IS A NIGHTMARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Duke stepped on the Vampire fleeing and pushed a button on his vehicle. The bike turned into an air bike and quickly blasted off into the air, leaving puffs of smoke behind. Duke tried to get as far away from the people he had just encountered.

"You shouldn't have scared him off like that, guys." Said Pamela.

"Sorry." They both said.

"We only wanted a ride to Sydney." Pamela kicked the sand and sighed in grief, waiting for another passer by to come.

The Raven boat rose from the water and continued its way on surface. Past the Sydney Opera House it went and past the Bondai Beach. The Raven created waves, not realizing of something following behind them.

"Attention." Said Shizuku. "Smokey in pursuit."

"(Dr. Slump! We've got the cops behind us!)" Said Doraemon.

"(Arale! Make us invisible! Kill the lights!)" Said Dr. Slump.

"Okay!" Arale saluted and typed some words onto the computer at the back. Everyone wore their red night vision goggles and switched them on.

"Invisible shield on." Said Shizuku. Within seconds after the water waves calmed down a little the Raven had completely vanished into thin air. The lights inside the car had totally blacked out.

"(Idiots!)" Dr. Slump giggled with the others.

"(They can't see us! But we can see them!)" Said Doraemon.

None of them took interest of the two police boats blocking their path up ahead.

"(We're gonna win!)" Arale danced with Ga-chan holding hands.

"(We're gonna be the champions!)" Said Ga-chan.

"(Dr. Slump. We have some problem up ahead.)" Said Doraemon.

"(Well, what do you know! A Kojak with a Kodak! No problem! A little shooting will do the trick!)" Dr. Slump sat next to Doraemon and controlled the two arm cannons in front of the boat.

"Targets locked." Shizuku confirmed when crosshairs were set onto the two boats.

"Fire!" Dr. Slump pressed the triggers and two laser shots blasted onto each of the boats.

"(And now for the grand finale!)" Dr. Slump pressed the blue button at the center of the controls.

"Firing blades." Shizuku said. A red razor spiral blade shot out of the Raven and cut through the top half of each of the boats. The way was finally cleared and the invisible boat drove off.

"SAYANARA!!!!!!!!! BYE BYE!!!" Dr. Slump and the others grinned back at the wrecked boats as they passed them.

"What the hell was that?" Said one of the cops.

"I don't know. But whatever it was, it was doing 145 mph!" Said another.

But then, something else passed by them too. But this time everyone could see it. It was Yoruba's boat. Though things weren't quite over yet because on his tail came Sharky and George.

"WHOA!" Sharky stopped his submarine. "What happened to you guys?"

No one answered his question.

"Um, Sharky, you just lost that boat we were chasing." Geroge watched Yoruba get away.

"Oh drat." Sharky sighed.

"Here you go!" The Swedish Chef had just prepared breakfast for Richie Rich and the others at the diner counter.

"Hey, Richie. I didn't realize you could afford a diner in the Slingshot!" Said Britney.

"C'mon. Eat up you." Elly gave some food to Dill.

"Aren't you guys going to eat?" Said Wade Duck to the robots.

"Oh, R2 and I don't eat. We think it's absolutely revolting." Said C-3PO.

"Amen to that." Said Rosie. Fozzie was busy writing some notes on his little pad which he had.

"Hey, Kermit." He said.

"What is it, Fozzie?"

"Guess what I'm going to do with the money?"


"Well, first I'm going to get my mum a brand new house, with a swimming pool and tennis court, then I'm going to…….." Fozzie was interrupted by Gonzo.

"Hang on! Slow down, Fozzie! You can't just have all the money to yourself!"

"He's got a point there." Said Rizzo. "What are you trying to do? Rip us all off?" The Slingshot suddenly stopped moving.

"Warning. The Slingshot has stopped." Said the Robot.

"R2. How far are we from Sydney?" Asked Richie Rich. R2-D2 replied.

"He said about seven miles." Said C-3PO.

"Must be the police or something." Said Richie. "Don't worry, our driver can handle it. He always does."


The doors to the Slingshot opened. Three figures entered into the vehicle.

"Hello?" Said Pamela Anderson.

"Guess nobody's here." Said Eddie Izzard.

"Hang on, people." Rupaul pointed to the driver's seat on the right from where they were standing. "I think it's about time we ask our friend here for a little ride." Rupaul put on his make up and slowly approached the seat. He turned it round, not knowing that he came face to face with an orangutan. "Excuse me sir…………"

The orangutan grabbed hold of Rupaul and kissed him on the lips. Rupaul jutted back and coughed out for air. Pamela and Eddie gasped in shock by the driver's appearance.

"Holy shit!" Rupaul ran back to his friends.

"Do you know what that is?" Said Pamela.

"Dang right! That's one god damn cheeky chimp!" Rupaul wiped the orangutan's spit from his lips. "I'm gonna teach that bad boy some lessons!" He marched up to the laughing orangutan who was standing on top of his seat and jumping about on it. "Now see here, mister……." The orangutan suddenly slapped Rupaul on the face. He collapsed to the floor at once.

"Who hired him to be driver?" Said Eddie.

"Who cares?" Said Pamela. "Eddie you ask him what we want." Eddie approached the orangutan regretfully.

"Um, pardon my intrusion, sir, but if it's not too much, may we please ask you if…….." The orangutan did nothing but slap him up like he did with Rupaul and Eddie soon joined him on the floor.

"A woman's gotta do what a woman's gotta do!" Pamela spat her hands and stomped to the orangutan. "Now you listen to me and listen good! Me and my friends are trying to get to Sydney. And all we ask for is a nice kind lift. Now are you going to be cheeky like you are now are you going to take us nicely to Sydney right now?! HUH?! ANSWER ME!"

The orangutan's obvious answer was a double karate chop on the neck. Now Pamela was on the ground. She was really furious now.

"C'mon, guys! Let's go together. We can take care of this son of a bitch all at once! One…..two……..three!" They rose from the ground and charged at the orangutan, who simply just slapped them all as the three bumped their heads together and fell to the floor again.

"It sounds he's really beefing those cops up." Gonzo listened to next door.

"Yeah. That chimp's really got attitude." Said Rizzo.

"AAAAAA!!!! LET GO ME!!!!! NOOO!!!!!!!" Rupaul was thrown out of the Slingshot from the large door from which they entered.

"NOT THE FACE!!!!!!! NOT THE FACE!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!" Eddie Izzard was the second person to be thrown out.

"YOU LET ME GO!!!!!!!!! YOU LET ME GO NOW YOU HAIRY SON OF A……YAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Pamela landed on top of Rupaul and Eddie when she was the last person the orangutan tossed out of the huge van.

When they all looked up at the orangutan driver, they opened their mouths and looked at each other when they saw him finger them and make silly sounds with his mouth which sounded most insulting. After that the he closed the door and returned to his seat. Pamela, Eddie and Rupaul watched helplessly as the Slingshot drove off, leaving them for the second time out in the highway.

"Should we get another ride?" Asked Eddie.

"OH! SHUT UP!" Screamed Pamela.

"All right!" Richard Simmons clapped his hands. "You're doing great, Mr. Connelly!"

"And you'll be having a knuckle sandwich if you don't stop chanting your stupid gay remarks all the time!" Billy Connelly threatened.

Billy Elliott was getting tired of Marcel Marceau at the back. He kept constantly performing his miming acts and Billy just yawned at everything he did.

"Car 54. We need backup now. We have a driving clown on the loose five miles east from Sydney." Five police cars were chasing Bozo the Clown on his Firefly car.

"Can't catch me! YUK! YUK! YUK!" Bozo went off the road and surprisingly drove off the edge of the mountain cliff.

"What the hell was he doing?" Everyone stopped.

They got out of their cars and looked down. There was nothing. Having thought they'd killed the poor man, they all made the sign of the cross.

"God bless that man." Said a cop.

"Sorry, sir. We were just doing our job." Said another one.

"HEY!!!!!!! HEEEEEEEEY!!!! YUK! YUK! YUK!" The police suddenly jumped to the floor when the firefly jet fighter came out from the cliff and flew past all of the police cars. "SEE YA LATER!!!!!!!!! YUK YUK!!!!!!!!!"

"After that clown!" Said the Sergeant through his cell phone to the police choppers above. They appeared behind the mountains and made their dash to the Bozo who was already flying his way to Sydney.

"So, do you think you can pull it off?" Whiskers was talking one of his friends on the street.

"Whiskers, you don't have anything to worry about!" Crash Bandicoot smiled. "I'll take care of those cops before you know it!"

"You okay back there, Elliott?" Mike asked.

The green dragon nodded.

"Then up we go!" Whiskers transformed their car into a jet plane. "Goodbye Crash! And thanks!"

"Yeah! So long!" Mike looked back as they left the ground.

"Good luck in that race!" Crash shouted.

"Agent J." Said Agent K in the Jackhammer. "Prepare for battle. Get the Martians in their places."

"Um, what's going on?" Agent Moulder sat at the back with the Martians.

"No worries, Agent Moulder. We're just getting a few obstacles out of our way, that's all." Said Agent J.

The front part of the Jackhammer opened up to reveal two laser cannons ready to fire. The back lifted up and formed a small shooting base, where both Martians sat in front of a large double laser cannon.

"Um…..Max." Xena turned back.

"What is it, Xena?" Said Max.

"I think we're going to be fried by that thing behind us." She replied. Max glanced back and saw the Jackhammer ready to shoot at the Iguana. But he couldn't stop either because in front of them was a police car driving right for them.

"What are we going to do?" Said Hercules.

"Something I've always wanted to do in this race!" Max grinned. With a push of a button, the front of the Iguana opened up to form double laser cannons sticking out and a razor spiral blade that spun fiercely. It looked as if it could cut through anything, maybe even a car?

"DAK! DAK! DAK!" The Martians shot out lasers from their cannon. Max dodged them swiftly while trying to find a way to get past the car in front of them. Agent K fired his cannons as well, but he had problems too.

"Um…….Agent K, I think you're missing." Said Agent Moulder.

"Don't sweat. We'll get them sooner or later."

"Oh, yeah? What about that other car heading our way?" Agent J stared in horror.

"OH NO!" Cried Max as he ran right into the police car, which luckily he cut in half thanks to his spiral blade. And so he continued the race despite their miraculous escape.

"YIKES!" Agent K almost lost control of the Jackhammer when passing through the remains of the police car. The cops quickly got out of their wreaked car and watched the two vehicles race off past them.

"Hey, dudes!" Michelangelo came back with iced drinks. "Drink are on me!"

The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles had never had a sunny vacation such as this. There they sat at the Bondai beach, just enjoying the sun and blowing their brains out.

"It's so nice that Shredder isn't around." Said Donatello. "That SOB's always up to no good."

"You know guys, I'd really go for a nice hot juicy pizza right now." Raphael murmured.

"YOU SAID THE MAGIC WORD!" Leonardo jumped. "I'll go get some!"

"Damnit, I hate cops." Ivy drove through the streets on the Stinger with Charles and the kids. More cops were just ahead of them. "Charles. Press that switch on your right." Charles switched the green switch on his right.

"What the hell is going on?" Eric Cartman felt the car shaking as if there was an earthquake. The wheels of the Stinger lifted upwards and tanks wheels replaced their position. The wheels themselves turned into exhaust guns.

"Time that Ms. Ivy got a little naughty!" A giant windshield gun popped out on front. With all the weapons prepared, they fired without warning at the blocking resistance in front. Police jumped out of the way when the tank car rammed through their cars and made its way onwards. The boys did nothing but laugh.

"YEEHAW! That was sure fun! Wasn't it, boys?" Said Charles Manson.

"That's was so sweet!" Said Stan.


"IVY ALL THE WAY!" Said Eric.

"You go, Ivy!" Said Stan.

Ivy gave a slick smile and looked at the angry people through the glass mirror by her side.

"Oh, shoot!" Guybrush said. "We've got some cops behind us!"

"May I suggest we ascend to the sky?" Said Durga. "I'm sure the race will be much easier that way."

"Better do as she says, honey." Elaine said.

"Oh, all right."

Guybrush made the Head Hunter turn into a small helicopter and flew away. At the same time, coincidentally, Crash Bandicoot happened to be in the middle of the road. The mighty pirate just passed above him.

"All righty, coppers! Time to meet your stop right here!" Crash grinned wildly. "Nobody's going to stop my friends winning the Cannonball Run!"

As the cops drove into him, Crash spun crazily like he always did and hit the cars that got in his way.

"Wow." Elaine looked down. "What a mess. There're police cars flying everywhere."

"Prepare for combat, Stimpy! We're gonna get rid of that tank post!"

"But Ren……"

"No buts, Stimpy! That vehicle is going to take over us if we don't do something."

"Whatever you say." The Billboard Blast opened up. Red missiles were locked in place and Bigfoot sat on the cannon ray in the middle. The Thunderball beside them took the same actions. It too opened up to display two cannon areas where Buttercup and Bubbles sat. The center was where Blossom sat with a large laser gun. The girls' companions sat in shock.

"My…….I didn't sing up for any of this!" Said Abraham.

"I didn't even know we were at war!" George wondered.

"Oh God! Where art thou?" William grew pale.

"It's time we kick some ass!" Buttercup aimed her targets on the Billboard Blast. "Sometimes if you want something done right, you gotta do it yourself!"

"You ready, Bubbles?" Said Blossom.


"Fire at will!"

"Fire, Bigfoot!" Yelled Ren laughing like a maniac.


Not far away, Smart Ass and the other weasels were on a small inflated boat. Greasy held a small remote control, on his hand.

"Okay, Greasy. This is what you do." Said Smart Ass. "You press this red button here. And that should release those mechanical sharks from the bottom of the water. Now, since these sharks are equipped with a timed self destruct bomb on them, it's important that you get them right near the Cannonballers. So don't mess up!"

"Yes, boss." Greasy saluted and pressed the red button on his controller. Two robotic sharks came up to the surface of the sea when they caught sight of the Billboard Blast and Thunderball cross them.

"Here they come, boss!" Stupid saw the two battling boats.

"Perfect!" Smart Ass rubbed his hands. The five weasels watched in amusement.

"We're getting nowhere, Stimpy! Prepare this thing for lift off!"

"Okay, dokey, Ren! You ready Bigfoot?"

Bigfoot saluted.

"Bubbles! Buttercup! This isn't helping! We're gonna have to fly our way out of here!" Said Blossom. "Prepare to take off!"


"What did she say?" The others said.

Even though the sharks were right on their tail, the two vehicles lifted off from the water and flew high to the sky. The weasels ducked when they flew right over them. Yet the sharks from behind were still moving, that is, at the weasels' boat.

"BOSS!" Greasy nudged Smart Ass. The weasels looked at the metal sharks swimming at their boat. It seemed that they had not just lost their targets but had now decided to head for the nearest living thing they could sense, in other words, the weasels were doomed.


A large explosion burst out behind the Billboard Blast and the Thunderball.


"WHOA!" Raphael looked up at the gust of flames far away. "What in blazes was that?"

"Who cares?" Michelangelo said while munching down on some pizza. "This is our vacation, dude!"

"Yeah, they don't need our help!" Said Donatello.


Raphael took out his binoculars and looked at the waving weasels who were near to drowning.

"Guys, I really think we should go over there."

"O, Raph." Leonardo set a fresh hot pizza in front of his face. "Just smell that delicious pizza. Now you don't wanna let this baby go, do you?"

Raphael hesitated.

"GAA! I hate it when this happens!" Raphael snatched the pizza and chowed down.

"HELP US!" The Weasels cried.

"Sorry, guys. Nothing personal!" Raphael shrugged.

"RRRRRRRROOAARRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Nemesis scowled at the police cars behind them.

"I know." Steve Austin tried not to crash the Bulldog. "We gotta lose them somehow."


"You sure about that?" Said Steve. Nemesis nodded his head. "Okay then, get ready."

The Bulldog transformed into a tank truck and armed its weapons. A red missile was then aimed at the enemies.

"RROOOAARRR!!!!!!!!" Nemesis growled.

"You ready?.......Aim………fire!" Steve gave the signal and Nemesis fired the missile. A large booming sound was heard and the Bulldog drove away out of Sydney.

"I thought you knew a shortcut, Dick!" Said Fearless Leader.

"What are you trying to pull?" Said Macavity.

"Be quiet! Muttley is the one you should blame. He just led us into the bunch of cops chasing us right now!" Said Dick Dastardly in the Wildcat. "But hey, look on the bright side! We're almost out of Sydney!"

"Yes, and going into even more chaos! HA! HA!" The Purple Pie man laughed.

"HA! HA HAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!" The Mask laughed when the Razorback made its way out of Sydney.

"Things are looking good for us, Elwood!" Said Jake.

"You can say that again!" Said Elwood.

"Let's party!" Freakazoid grooved about as he turned on the radio.

"Rolly! I think it's time we split up!"

"But Shorty……..what are you talking about? Are you saying you 'love' me?"

"NO! I didn't mean like that! I meant that we should spread out separately and make our own waya to Japan!"


The Dynamo split into two vehicles. Shorty went on the small red helicopter on air while Rolly was left on ground on his racing kart. They both waved goodbye and went off.

"Hadji! Don't leave us!" Said Tara Lipinski in the Afterburner.

"There's nothing to worry about! You guys will do fine!" He said.. "Now come on. Get to your places."

Everyone did as he said and the Afterburner split apart into two vehicles. Tara operated the blue jet plane and Hadji stayed behind on a long extended car. He waved at them while Tara and the others waved back with a smile that didn't seem too happy. "Good luck my friends!"

"Well, guess we're on our own from here." Said Baby-Lickety Split.

"Wow, Devon! I've never been on a jet plane before!" Said Cornwall. Devon was already starting to feel air sick.

"Talk about yourself!" Devon was in the boundaries of throwing up.

"Here we go, guys!" Tara ignited the plane's jets.

"I'M GOING TO BE SICK!" Devon shouted.

"Um, Joe? Are you sure about this?" Said Tiger Woods.

"Have I ever failed?" Said Joe Montana. Tiger shook his head. "Then let's hurry!"

The Vandal broke up into a car and a small airplane. Gabrielle Reece steered the plane with Tiger Woods, while David Beckham and Joe Montana drove the car.

"JOEEEEE!!!!!!!!! Get me down! I hate flying!" Tiger waved his arms round like a sissy girl. "HEEEEEEELP!"

"Too late for that now." Gabrielle winked at him.

"See you guys later!" David Beckham waved up at them.

"(You two ready?)" Sub-Zero said. Kim and Mitsurugi nodded.

Sub-Zero pressed the button and the vehicle split into yet again, like some of the other vehicles in the race, an airplane and another car. Kim and Mitsurugi together drove the plane, and looked back at Sub-Zero one more time before ascending into the clouds.

"(He'll be okay.)" Said Kim.

"(We better hurry to Japan, before anyone else gets there first.)" Said Mitsurugi.

"Here's your salami sandwich, sir." Hoy handed over Eddy's Gordo's lunch.

"Nice and fresh, sir." Said Hotep.

"Thank you." Eddy took an immediate bite to get rid of his hunger as quick as possible, "You people doing okay back there? Are the cops still there?"

"Yep, still there." Said Michael Jordan.

"There's more coming, Eddy." Said Doug.

"Yeah, we better drive quicker." Said Malik.

"No! Don't say that!" Said Leon.

"Hmmm…..what a great idea!" Snapped Eddy.

"Too late, man! He's going to really floor it!" Said Rawle.

"Try to catch me now, you bastards!" Eddy stepped onto the pedal. Everyone flew backwards as the Fireforce went out of Sydney at maximum speed.

"Aw! Look Shaft!" Linka pointed out in front of the road.

"Hey, isn't that a Koala bear?" Said Dudley.

"(Yes! It is!)" Said Mr. Worm.

"Huh? What Koala? Where?" Shaft accidentally ran over the Koala in the middle of the road under the heavy wheels of the Detonator.

"Never mind." Linka looked away in disgust.

"Stop, Roman!" Said the police.

"Move it!" Maximus flew past the other cars and people on his Racing Arena. "Maximus will triumph in this race!"

"Faster, Edwin!" Yelled Fat Bastard on the Sea Attack boat. "Those police are coming to chop us into haggis!"

"I'm trying!" Said Edwin. "Dhalsim. Help us out here!"

"Relax your mind and you will find your way."

"Listen, we don't have time for that! We gotta move, now!" Said Fat Bastard.

"Do it now!" Shouted Santa Clause on the Arctic Assault boat. Mario Lemieux turned on his jet pack, the Arctic Assault 2, and rocketed upwards. Mario equipped his snow shoes attached with two blizzard guns. A missile was also attached to the jet pack.

"Santa! You gonna be okay with those cops?" Mario pointed to the boats not far behind.

"Don't worry! Pingu and I will be okay! Go on ahead to Japan!" Santa answered.

Mario waved him goodbye and left. Pingu tapped Santa on the shoulder and pointed to the other boats.

"Let's go, Pingu!" Santa started up the Artic Assault boat. Two blizzard guns similar to Mario's popped up in the front of the toboggan boat and Santa rode away, shooting past the obstacles in his way.

"(You see, Igi? It's not that bad!)" Said Ogo to the frightened Igi.

"(Well, I guess not.) He gazed down from the Glider Strike.

"(Of course it isn't!)" Said Oglas.

"(But what about that!?") Igi looked forwards. The three were about to hit the Sydney Opera House.

"WHOOOOOAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!" Ogo raised the Glider Strike upwards just before they were about to crash.

"Roger! We've left Sydney!" Said Eddie. "Now it's off to Japan!"

"Oh, goodie! I hope we can eat some nice sushi there! I just love Japanese food!" Said Roger Rabbit.

"You better rest some more, Roger." Jessica pulled him back down to her lap. "Otherwise you might spoil your appetite if you get too excited."

"You're doing a good job, Eddie!" Said Dolores. Eddie just laughed as he drove into the deserts of Australia once again.

"Commander Foyt." Said Captain Harris. Proctor, the Commander and himself were in a small chopper vehicle hovering nearby the Sydney Opera House. "We have just received note that most of the Cannonballers have now left Sydney."

"What do you mean by 'most', Captain?" Said C. Foyt.

"Well, according to what we know, there only seems to be one left in this city."

"Well, then. Who is it? Speak it up, Captain." But once C. Foyt said that, Proctor lost control of the chopper as the Switchblade plane flew right past them. "YAA!"

"Did we hit them?" Said James.

"It doesn't matter!" Meowth wasn't bothered to look back.

"We've got to catch up with the others!" Said Jesse.

The police chopper flew into the Sydney Opera House. But luckily the three victims inside had already jumped out…….almost to their death. C. Foyt was now hanging on top of the building, clinging for her life, while Captain Harris held onto her legs. The Captain's pants were pulled down by Proctor who hung onto his legs.

"HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" They cried. Police choppers came to their aid.

"Don't worry, we'll get you down, Commander………" The pilot of one of the choppers hesitated.

"FOYT!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Everyone shouted.

"Somebody get me down from here! You imbeciles!" Said C. Foyt.

"The Cannonballers are heading for Japan in Asia, Captain!" Said Proctor. "Maybe we can catch them there!"

"Oh, shut up, Proctor!" Captain Harris was embarrassed in the situation he was in now. "You were born an idiot and you'll always be an idiot!"

…To Asia…