Digimon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction ❯ *~The TAD Fics~* ❯ Tad little Chaos on Valentine's Day ( Chapter 15 )

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Pokémon, Jack Sparrow or really anything mentioned in this fic, besides myself and the lamppost. Oh and the Weapons of Mass Destruction ;D

AUTHOR'S NOTES: The 15th Tad Fic YAY! This fic comes free with many weapons of mass destruction, some fake boobs and Michael Jackson...use them well XD

TAD LITTLE CHAOS ON VALENTINE'S DAY!

Today Ash and his twerpy friends are talking a long not needed break in a pokémon Center in an un-named town as they celebrate the day known as valentine's day!

"Hey, do we even celebrate Valentine's day in Japan?" Brock wondered out loud. As soon as these words left his mouth a man in a black suit came barging through the door of the Pokémon Center squishing Max behind it as he did.

"OoooOoooh, so this is what it's like to get hit by a door and suffer internal bleeding.... kinda fun..." the young boy mumbled happily before falling face down on the floor with a thud.

The man marched straight over to Brock, May and Ash who looked up at him before he brought out some reading glasses and a piece of paper from his black suit.

"Ahem... I, Executive producer of the 4kids right to take away Japanese heritage, does hereby remind you that you are AMERICANS... can you repeat that to me... you are AME...RI...CANS!"

"We are Americans...." the three repeated back in a flat emotionless tone, staring at the man like they we're zombies.

"Good!" The man said as he proceeded to walk back towards the door. As he did a small boy dropped some food on the ground.

"Awwww, man! I dropped my rice ball and ramen with a side of Sushi...."

"They are SANDWICHES! Can you repeat that for me.... they are SAND....WICH....ES!"

"They are sandwiches...." the boy replied in the same tone of voice as Ash and his friends did, he then stood there drooling and staring into nothingness as the 4kids producer continued to the door. Just as he reached it he spotted Max now laying in a pool of blood.

"And YOU are not dead! You are merely sleeping in ketchup..."

"I can be dead if I want to!" the muffled angry voice of Max sounded. The 4Kids Producer just shook his head tuting to himself.

"That's not the kind of attitude we need at 4kids.... not at all...."

With that he left the building full of rather stunned people, his voice disappearing off into the distance....

"That isn't a Kimono, that's a DRESS! Can you repeat that for me? D-R-E-S-S!"

Soon everyone in the Pokémon Center began to come back to their senses as they looked around confused.

"What just happened?" May asked, she then squealed and put her hands to her mouth in shock. "I didn't have another Psychotic episode and kill someone did I!?!"

"If you did then all you did was kill Max..." Brock replied, pointing to Max's emotionless body.

"Meh..." May replied not looking interested as she proceeded to walk into a wall.... several times.

"I don't understand it...seems like we're missing time..." Brock said as he raised his hand to his chin and went into "Think Mode" . "did we get abducted by aliens?"

With that he looked towards a Kilgon who was flirting with Nurse Joy at the desk.

"Don't look at me!" he snorted before drinking some red bull to grow some wings and then flllllyyyyy awaaaaaaay~! "RED BULL GIVES YOU WIIIIIIIIIINGSSSSSSSS! OW! Damn ceiling...."

"BRoooooooooooock!" May screamed as she poked Ash's head continually. "I think Ash is still in an alien induced coma thingy...."

"Nah, he just does that sometimes" Brock replied. "You just gotta give him the right motivation to get him moving again"

With that Brock whispered in his young friends ear.

"They're giving away free Pokémon badges for the hoenn league at the town hall...."

A smile grew on Ash's face as his eyes began to light up.

"FREE....POKÉMON...BADGES....EEEEEEE!"

He then ran out of the Pokémon Center as fast as he could only to be run over by a milk truck driven by a dog.

"WATCH WHERE YOU GOIN' PUNK!" The dog yelled before driving off and into a tree where the milk float proceeded to catch on fire and blow up.

*******************************************

Meanwhile we take a look at what happened yesterday on "I'm a Team Rocket member, get me out of here!"

"It's day 5 and the ruff living of the Australian outback has taken it's toll on James...." the announcer...erm...announced.

"Hehehehehe! Look I'm Jordan and I have big boooooooobs!" James giggled as he pranced about naked with only large fake boobs strapped to his chest, he then tripped up and fell into a nearby Lagoon.

"Jesse, James fell into the lagoon again...." Cassidy told her rival but Jesse had her hands full with peter Andre, who she was sat in the lap of.

"Hummmm, you certainly have and interesting Body Mr. Andre..." she muttered happily as she stroked his gel filled hair. Then suddenly the author popped out of nowhere and shot Peter Andre through the head.

"HEY!" Jesse snapped. "What was that for!?!"

"I didn't like him as a kid..." the author replied, then shrugged. "...don't like him now, plus I gotta shoot something...ooowoooohhh...MYsTiROUS GiRL!!!!"

With that the author shot up into the trees, then the body of Steve Irwin fell from it.

"I think I found lunch...." the author muttered, poking Steve Irwin with a stick.

"Ooooh that gun toting Author is always such a laugh!" the announce announced, prompting the author to look around her.

"Where in the hell is that voice coming from?"

"What voice?" Cassidy ask. "We didn't hear any voices...."

"Erm...well I did..." squeaked Mondo before curling into a ball and shaking. "...I hear many voices....they tell me to kill things...."

"I'm surrounded by insane people..." Butch muttered as he put his cigarette to his mouth but the author quickly took it from him and threw it away into the undergrowth.

"Smoking is bad MMMMMMKAY!" the snapped. She then started sniffing the air. "Hey...do you guys smell burning?"

*************************************

Back in the Pokémon Center Brock was reading the latest Pokémon newspaper, on the front was a picture of two firefighters ogling at James and his fake large breasts as the Team Rocket member sits there looking all bashful and TRYING to look innocent, the headline reads: "GIANT BUSH FIRE - AUTHOR SAYS IT'S BUTCH'S FAULT!"

Suddenly George Bush barged into the Pokémon center followed by a bunch of army type people.

"HAND OVER ALL YOUR WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION!!!!!"

Everyone looked at him puzzled before Nurse Joy approached him.

"We have no weapons of mass destruction in here I'm afraid...." she told him. "...but we do have Michael Jackson" With that she pointed over to where Michael Jackson was talking to Max and Ash.

"Do you two want to become my special friends?" he asked. Both exchanged puzzled glances then shrugged and smiled before turning back to him.

"SURE!" they both said before following Michael out of the room.

"Awwwww...." Bush pouted. "...but I was told there was weapons of mass destruction here.... and oil....do you have Oil?" Bush looked up at Nurse Joy eagerly, like a little puppy getting a treat of some sort.

"Don't have Oil either I'm afraid" nurse Joy replied shaking her head. "Who told you we had those here?"

"Some random cute looking egg like things..." Bush replied. "...they were so cuuuuuuuuuute! Oh well....best leave..."

Bush and his army then started to cry as they left the Pokémon Center. Once they had left Brock called Nurse Joy over to him, then whipped off a sheet covering a very large Nuclear warhead in the middle of the room.

"If we don't have weapons of mass destruction here then....what's this?"

"Erm...er.... that's my....pet project..." Nurse Joy said nervously before quickly wheeling the Nuclear Warhead out of the room.

********************************

Meanwhile at another Pokémon center on the other side of the un-named town.

"Whahahahahahaha!" Whahahahaed Togetic as he watched his little Togepi minions build his many weapons of mass destruction from high up on a balcony. "Soon this whole world will be mine...MINE I SAY... and everyone will have to bow before the mighty power of TOGETIC TEH EVIL ONE!!!!!"

"Soooo, you sure all this will bring back Saddam...?" Satan asked the little evil egg thing. "Cos I've written to George Bush a million times asking him if he could release Saddam at weekends but I think he's just ignoring my letters..."

"Mah... why's that so bad?" Osama asked as he threw cookies and flowers off the Balcony. "...after all now you can be my bitch!"

"I...don't think so..." Satan mumbled before kicking Osama off the balcony making him land in a pool full of corrosive Nuclear stuff.

"Wheeeeee! Corrosive Fun!!!!" He screamed happily as he began to do the doggy paddle in it.

"Hummmm... first in my plans of world domination I think I'll try my hand at Bio-terrorism..." Togetic continued. "...I've always wanted to try that, I'll blow up a truck in the middle of a city and infect loads of people..."

"Why would you wanna do that when you can drop a bomb on them?" Satan asked.

"COS I WANNA ESCAPE THIS DREAM WORLD THE BUTTERFLIES ARE SHOWING ME!!!!!!"

Satan looked at togetic with a confused expression. "What butterflies?"

"THOSE ONES!" Togetic snapped, pointing to nothing, he then proceeded to chase the imaginary butterflies. Satan just rolled his eyes at the egg demon's antics.

*cough* "Copied from the Cowboy Bebop Movie" *Cough, cough*

"Hey! Don't make me send the Butterflies after you Satan..." Togetic warned him. Satan just sighed and walked off.

"Have fun being insane"

****************************************************
< br> Back at the Pokémon Center everyone was now getting into pairs cos nobody wanted to look like a stupid lonely loser on Valentine's day. Brock was sat trying to write a love letter to Nurse Joy but couldn't think of what to write.

"Nurse Joy...Your eyes are like candy, your hair is like some kind of pink fluffy....stuff....nah...." He grumbled as he crossed out his attempt at a poem. "Nurse Joy, I love you, you love me, How about a sexy night for three.... no...wait...three... if I put that I have to get an extra person....." Groaning he started to chew on his pencil, then his face lit up. "OFFICER JENNY! YEAH!"

As Brock put together the perfect Valentine's threesome he suddenly became aware of something watching him from behind, he turned around to see a Lamppost stood behind him, it's light flickering.

"Do you MIND? This is PRIVATE!" he snapped at it. The Lamppost just continued to flicker it's light at him.

"I don't care HOW much you do that, you are NOT being the 3rd person..."

*flicker*

"Your not!"

*Flicker*

"Stop it!"

*Flicker*

I said NO!"

*Flicker*

"OH ALRIGHT! You can take part too, goddamnit!"

With that he wrote down the Lamppost on the list under Officer Jenny's name.

Suddenly there was a loud squeal as James entered the room and glomp tacked the lamppost.

"EEEEE! LAMPPY! I MISSED YOUUUUU!"

"I thought you were in the outback?" Brock asked, James stood up holding the Lamppost in his arms.

"Yeah I was but they sent me home"

"I see your still wearing the fake breasts..." Brock pointed out. James just blushed and smiled.

"Yeah they've really grown on me...hope to grow some of my own soon...."

Brock just looked at him and sweatdroped before the lamppost began to flicker again.

"What's this?" James said. "Brock's letting you be in a threesome.... awwww I wanna be in it too, can I Brock! Can I?"

Brock just sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Oooookay, I guess, but you better be damn good...."

"Oh I am Big Boy" James replied winking. His thoughts then turned to his feline teammate as Brock noted down James' name on the list. "Can Meowth come too, he's been feeling kinda lonely recently..."

Brock just growled then added meowth's name to the list. As he did Ash approached them.

"Thought you were with Michael Jackson?" Brock asked his young trainer friend.

"I was!" the trainer happily announced. "He taught me how to touch people!"

Ash then looked at the pieces of paper Brock had been writing his list on.

"Th....th....reee.....suuuuume.... sounds like fun, can I join?"

Brock just slammed his head against the table before adding Ash's name.

"I gotta get more girls in this!" he groaned. "The only one around is May.... guess I'll ask her...."

**************************************
Some minutes later....

Brock approached May who was trying to teach herself how to tie shoelaces.

"Up and under and round a bout...that's what shoe tying is all about!"

Brock looked down at her shoes, then back at May.

"May....your shoes don't have shoe laces..."

"Really?" the female trainer said, then stared down at her shows for a good five minutes before finally speaking again. "You're right...."

"Hey May, I was wondering if you were interested in a threesome...?" Brock asked quickly, trying not to give himself enough time to regret asking her, but May just looked back at him with a clueless look.

"What's a threesome?" she asked him. "....can you eat it?"

"It's a.... argh never mind...."

With that Brock left May who went back to tying her non-existent shoelaces.

As he walked across the Pokémon Center he was suddenly stopped by Jack Sparrow.

"Ere mate! I 'eard you were havin' some kind of threesome and I wanna take part too..." he told him, Brock just sighed once more and added Jack Sparrow onto the list.

"Ah, ah, it's CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow..."

Brock just glared at Jack Sparrow before adding the "CAPTAIN" in front of his name. After Jack left Brock looked over his list once more and rolled his eyes.

"Better go invite the only girls involved then..."

*********************************
AND NOW IT'S TIME FOR WASTING TIME WITH TRACEY~!

"Hi I'm Tracey and..."

*Cheese falls ontop of him*

********************************

That night Brock was waiting in the bedroom of the Pokémon center, handcuffed to the bed and wearing nothing but leather underwear. He looked over at the clock which read 9:30pm.

"Where is everyone...." he moaned, looking over his now page long list of people. "I told them to be here at 7:30pm...I've been like this for two hours... I'm losing all blood circulation to my hands...and I'm cold....and hungry..."

Just then the door opened and Brock sat up eagerly, but his face dropped when he saw it was Pikachu. The little rat walked in nibbling on a Poké-treat, unaware Brock was even in the room until he looked up.

Both stared at each other awkwardly for a while before Pikachu began to back out of the door.

"I'll be going now..." he said before running off, leaving Brock all on his own.

Downstairs everyone was outside captivated by a comet in the sky.

"Ooooooh! we should make wishes!" Nurse Joy suggested. "I wish that I can heal more Pokémon!"

"I wish to be a Pokémon Master!" added on Ash.

"I wish for nachos!" May announced, smiling.

"I have no problem with Nachos!" the 4kids producer replied.

"Then it's settled!" Jack Sparrow shouted to them all. "NACHOS AND RARE CANDIES FOR ALL!"

Everyone cheered and went inside the Pokémon Center, closing a rather jolly Valentine's day.

*****************************************
3:41AM

Brock looked around the room before sighing again.

"I'm so lonely....."

THE END

Happy Valentine's Day~!