Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ The We-Must-Be-Out-of-Our-Tiny-Minds Road Trip ❯ Alternate Realities Are Scary ( Chapter 9 )

Oh yeah! I should have 100% fun writing this chapter! It was actually supposed to be chapter 7, but this fic has a nasty, nasty habit of writing itself out how IT wants to be written out, not always as I envision it O_o. Aaaaaaaaah!!! The fic's alive!!!! *Runs*

Disclaimer: Disclaimer-O-Matic 4000 says, TRF does not own creamed cheese.

What?!

Disclaimer-O-Matic 4000 says, TRF does not own giraffes

Er…no I don't….

Disclaimer-O-Matic 4000 says, TRF does not own George W. Bush

Damn straight! Like I'd want to own him! But he's not even in this fic…

Disclaimer-O-Matic 4000 says, TRF does not own bouncy balls

*Blink* The fic has nothing to do with bouncy balls…

Disclaimer-O-Matic 4000 says, TRF does not own her soul

EXCUSE ME?! If I don't own my soul, who does?!

Disclaimer-O-Matic 4000 says, TRF sells her soul like a prostitute sells her body

THE HELL?! I DO NOT! I HAVE NEVER SOLD MY SOUL! *Kills the Disclaimer-O-Matic 4000* Stupid newfangled machines…gotta do this the old fashioned way…I do not own DBZ or any authors mentioned here. Geez, how hard was that?

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"…And little Mary Sue and the author who created her never saw the light of day again," finished J'dee, staring at everyone with a satisfied smirk on her face when she saw the all looking at least slightly fearful.

"Cool! Anyone got another?" asked Bana, being the first to recover from the story.

DA shook her head, then said, "Hey! Why don't we all scream now? Maybe that'll lure Vegeta and the other guys back in here!"

RJ nodded, "Hopefully Gohan too! Let's do it on the count of three. One…two…three…" they all let out the most annoying, fearful, high-pitched screams they could muster. The ceiling shook above them and suddenly a large chair flew through the door.

"It's the curse of the Mary Sues!" cried TRF, pointing to the chair, "It's come to claim us too!"

Suddenly, Vegeta was standing near the hole that the chair had made, "Not quite," he growled.

"SKITTLES!" yelled Bana running over to him. DA, T-Sama, and TRF followed.

"I'm here to tell you that you had all better shut up and go to bed now, or you won't live until morning," he rubbed his temple, "Some of us are trying to sleep!"

"Is Yamcha asleep?" asked J'dee, suddenly very interested.

"We were all asleep a moment ago before your screams woke us all," muttered Vegeta. He glanced down the hall and saw Lestat Bladua coming down it, "See? Your screams even woke the dead!"

"We can resurrect people? Neat!" said T-Sama with a grin.

"Can you sleep with us, Skittles?" asked Bana, giving her best shot at the 'puppy dog eyes' look, "We just heard scary stories and we don't want to sleep alone."

"How tragic," muttered Vegeta sarcastically. He turned to DA, "Why don't you ask your dog-boy muse to sleep in here with you? I swear he's been out to get me all day…"

"Inuyasha…" snarled DA dangerously, even though she knew he couldn't hear her.

"By the way, do any of you know where the onna is? Nobody has seen her in awhile and your muse seems to think you probably would have had something to do with it," he pointed a finger towards Bana and gave her a suspicious glance.

"No. She ran out of the room screaming that the pink elephants were out to get her and we haven't seen her since," replied Bana, faking sincerity.

"I don't buy that for one second, but I have plenty of time to look in the morning. Now all of you GET TO SLEEP!" he shouted before stomping away.

"That seemed like a pretty direct order," mumbled Chipolata.

"Me and Chipolata are sleeping in the same bed as Piccolo! Anyone else want to squeeze in?" asked Reikon.

"I will!" cried T-Sama, "Besides liking Vegeta, I'm a Piccolo and Goku fan too!"

"Since Vegeta isn't here, I'm with Juunana!" yelled TRF.

"Me too!" responded J'dee and Alexandra at virtually the same time.

Juunana and Piccolo looked extremely frightened.

Later after everyone had settled down, and the author had decided she was too lazy to write exactly where everyone was, the plot (Dude! We have a plot! This is the greatest day of my life!) moved forward. Everyone was asleep when the now-resurrected figure of Lestat Bladua crept through the hole in the door.

"Make me talk about the Plot Bunnies and give me a heart attack, ay?" he muttered to himself, "Well I'm going to show them something that'll practically make THEM have a heart attack!" he sprinkled um…Magical Fairy Blood…yes, Magical Fairy Blood, all over everyone and walked out of the room. He went to his own room in the attic and hopped into the trunk (Damn! We should've put Bulma in there after all!) that he slept in and laughed so hard that he hyperventilated and died…again.

~Very Real Dream That Everyone is Sharing Because of the Magical Fairy Blood~

TRF fell face first in the sand, and after spitting the sand out of her mouth, she looked up and saw all the other authors falling as well, "Where are we?" she asked as a few other people got up.

"I dunno," replied J'dee surveying the area, "but that looks like the Kame House," she pointed to a bright pink house in front of them.

"It says 'Bunny House' though," said S'rac staring at it closely.

"And we're on an island in the middle of nowhere. Fun," muttered Chipolata.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, four extremely blonde (No offense to people who're blonde though) teenagers wearing hot pink came up to them, "Like, are you, totally all right?" asked the first one.

Bana gave them a look of utmost disgust, "Who the hell are you?" she asked slowly.

"WE'RE THE KAKAROT KLUB!" they all cried perkily at the same time.

"S'cuse me while I go get sick," muttered DA.

"Wait! We need to, like, introduce ourselves before you go and do that, like, totally gross being sick thing!" said one of them grabbing DA's shoulder. DA gave her a 'get the hell off of me' look.

"Formation!" yelled another one. They then struck a very Ginyu-like pose and gave cheerleader-like smiles.

One of them leapt up and put her hands on her hips. If you looked close enough, you could see her pulling on the material of her hot pink top to make her seem even more well endowed than she already looked, "I'm GBF! Goku's Best Friend! But it used to mean something else when I was a fan of Digimon!" she smiled.

TRF started shuddering and then yelled, "No! I'm the one who had a name that meant something before and can mean another thing now!"

Another hopped up to the front perkily, "I'm Light Angel!"

"It's too horrible to be true!" moaned DA.

"I call myself G-Sama!" chirped another one.

T-Sama covered her ears, "I like Goku, but this is ridiculous!"

The fourth one leaped in front of the other three and did the splits perfectly, "You can all call me Strawberrygirl!" she declared.

"THE EVILNESS!" proclaimed Bana.

"Uh… think these people are yours to deal with. We'll just be going now!" said Reikon rather quickly. Everyone else followed suit and ran away leaving the four with their evil alternate-reality selves.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" screamed TRF, DA, T-Sama, and Bana.

"That was just freaky," muttered J'dee as they walked by the side of the house. But unfortunately, she bumped into a woman with purple lipstick, purple fingernail and toe polish, and even purple hair. She dressed in purple clothes, and her shirt had a picture of Freiza on the front.

"Who are you?!" the woman demanded. Then, out of thin air, she produced a Freiza doll and started 'conversing' with it, "What's that Freiza? You think I should kill her, you do? Yes, yes…I don't like her much either. She bumped into me. Very rude…very rude, wasn't it Freiza? Yes, that's right, that's what we do to people that are rude like that. Yes, she warranted that behavior, she warranted it very much…"

"Uh…what's your name?" asked J'dee slowly, pronouncing every syllable carefully and loudly as if to tell the person before her, "I CAN HEAR YOU, YOU PSYCHO BITCH!".

The person stared at her for a moment and then turned back to the Freiza doll, "The rude one just asked me for my name…how dare she ask Fay Dee for her name…? She is very rude, very, very rude…"

"Fay Dee?" asked J'dee looking a bit alarmed.

Fay Dee gave her a shocked look, "How did you know my name?!" she turned to the Freiza doll once again, "This one knows Fay Dee's name…she is a spy…she has been spying on us Freiza…"

"Well, ya know, we left Bana, TRF, T-Sama, and DA back there. Gotta treat everyone equally!" yelped Chipolata, shooting J'dee a 'sorry' look before she and everyone else ran off.

"TRAITORS!" screamed J'dee.

As the rest of the group walked on, unsure of what they would encounter next, they came upon a girl with red circles of make-up on her face meditating behind the house.

"Could you tell us where we are?" asked Chipolata, poking the girl.

The girl got up slowly and looked at them with big eyes, "You are on Bunny House Island. My real name matters not. You can call me Choutzutina. Why don't you stay with me as I meditate and bring myself closer to Choutzu, the Great One?"

Reikon looked at Chipolata, "You were saying something earlier about not like Choutzu at all…guess this one's yours. Sorry fellow Piccolo fan, but truth to tell, I don't like him much either and I'm not sticking around if I don't have to," everyone else nodded and dashed away.

"YOU ALL SUCK!" screeched Chipolata as loudly as she could.

On the other side of the house, they spotted two people arguing about who was better: The mushroom-headed guy from the Otherworld Tournament, or Yajirobe .

"It's Yajirobe I tell you! Now shut up before I hex you!" cried one, a girl who had black hair and eyes, a she pulled out a stick.

"No! How can you tell me that Yajirobe surpasses the greatness of my beloved mushroom-head?! How?! Are you evil?!" the other girl broke to the ground and started sobbing.

The other one snarled, "Yes I'm evil you knave! That's why I'm trying to perform a hex on you straight out of the pages of Harry Potter!" she was flicking the stick and muttering spells under her breath, trying to make them work.

The remaining group turned to face RJ and Kitami, "Sorry," said S'rac, "Looks like your stop. Have fun."

"DAMN YOU!" hollered Kitami and RJ, as Kitami tried to help up her sobbing evil alternate-reality self, and RJ was trying to coax hers into giving her the stick.

"Let's go inside the house," suggested Alexandra to her two only remaining author friends, Reikon and S'rac.

Reikon nodded, "I think I might feel sorry for everyone we left behind if we didn't. I'm hearing their tortured screams now."

"Hey look! The Kakarot Klub is trying to put make-up on T-Sama, DA, Bana, and TRF," observed S'rac calmly.

"The poor dears. I'll send the families fruit baskets if they don't live," muttered Reikon sarcastically as the three of them went inside.

When they walked into the front room, they noted that all the lights were dimmed, except for a center spotlight focusing on a girl covered head-to-toe in green with black spots on it, "I see you've entered my lair. Be chilled to the bone by its complete creepiness…" she said smiling evilly. When her three guests didn't seem to be at all scared, she turned on several fans, "I SAID BE CHILLED TO THE BONE!" she shrieked.

"Who are you, you evil creep who wears cell-colored clothes?" growled Alexandra.

The girl gave her best evil laugh, but she wasn't all that good at it, "I'm Cell-Luver! You'll pay for entering without my permission! You see…you need to ask nicely from the window before you come in," she said, gesturing to the open window and frowning as though she might cry because the three of them hadn't 'asked nicely'.

"Do forgive us for leaving you with her," murmured Reikon patting Alexandra on the shoulder before she and S'rac raced up the stairs behind Cell-Luver's back.

"I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU FOR THIS!" howled Alexandra angrily as Cell-Luver began to pull Cell merchandise out of the cupboards and throw it everywhere happily.

In the next level of the house, every light was turned off, but S'rac and Reikon could just make out a figure huddled in a dark corner mumbling darkly. Reikon flipped on a light, and the figure, which turned out to be a girl with hair wildly cut in a bunch of different lengths and bloodshot eyes turned and jumped on Reikon snarling.

"Who are you that you DARE," lightening flashed as she said 'dare', S'rac clapped appreciatively, Reikon would have too, but her arms were being pinned down, "enter the room of Vegkon?" she asked in a raspy voice.

Reikon shoved her off, "I'm Reikon, that's S'rac, and if we could help it, we wouldn't be in your stupid room filled with…" Reikon looked around and wrinkled her nose in displeasure, "Vegeta things."

"What? You are insulting the prince?! You are INSULTING the PRINCE?!?!" cried Vegkon madly, "NOBODY INSULTS THE PRINCE WHILE I'M AROUND!" she grabbed Reikon again and tried to punch her, but Reikon dodged.

"Who cares? If I don't like him, I don't like him! I'm entitled to an opinion, aren't I?" Reikon defended herself.

"NOT WITH ME AROUND!"

"Psycho. And here I was thinking Fay Dee was insane," muttered Reikon.

Vegkon stopped for a moment, "She is. But that's not the point."

"Nah. Psycho!" yelled Reikon, hoping she could get the evil alternate-reality her to engage in verbal combat rather than psychical.

"Vegeta-hating bitch!"

"Insane asylum escapee!"

"Cottage cheese!"

"…"

"…"

"I think I'll go now," murmured S'rac to himself.

When S'rac came to the room at the top of the house, he blinked in surprise as he saw an a midget of about 4'0 sitting in a large chair and giggling in a high-pitched voice, 'This is my evil alternate-reality self and the mastermind behind all this?' thought S'rac disbelievingly.

Then the midget noticed him and he started to pout, "Hey! You weren't supposed to make it here! The Grand Kai said you wouldn't!" whined the midget.

"The Grand Kai?" asked S'rac.

The midget rolled his eyes, "Duh. I couldn't do this alone. I had to have someone inwardly suggest to that DA girl that they all scream, which awoke Bladua, who wanted revenge on authors, and was able to sprinkle that stuff on you that brought your minds here."

"Wow…I thought this was just a dream," muttered S'rac raising his eyebrows.

"It sort of is. But it's a game too!" cried the midget happily, "See, if you lose against me, then your minds will all be trapped here forever, but if you win, you can all go back to having normal dreams. Fun, right?"

"To some demented person, I guess," mumbled S'rac.

"Hey! You will address me only as the Beautiful Billy Bob Joe!" protested the midget.

S'rac gave him a blank stare, before he broke out laughing.

"Wait! Don't laugh! You can't find this funny! It erases the whole-" but he was cut off. Everything except the authors began to gradually blur away, starting with Billy Bob Joe and ending with all the scenery around them.

"I'm a savior!" said S'rac with a large grin before he and the rest of the authors blacked out.

~End Evil Dream Sequence~

"Huh?!" yelped S'rac, leaping out of his bed in the room that all the guys (and the muses) were sharing, "Was that…a dream?"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" screamed the nine author girls waking up.

"Don't ever mention strawberries to me, ever again," moaned Bana.

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Wow. That chapter was over 2,000 words long. I'm amazed. Anyway, I hope you like it, I was running out of humor a bit near the end, it felt like. Anywho, to the two people who submitted forms to be in this, right now I'm not letting anyone else be in it, but I'll keep you guys in mind later on when I need new people if you keep reviewing to let me know you still read ^_^. And also, my evil school starts the 26th and you know what that means…*Everyone groans* we go back the whenever-the-hell-I-can-find-time-for-it update schedule. I'd hoped I'd have more chapters out by the start of this school year, but it turned out I had one event after the other this summer, and hopefully the next one won't be like that. I will still do my best to update whenever possible though, and I hear this grade is easier than the last one!

See you at the next update!

~TRF