Dragon Knights Fan Fiction ❯ Inside Tetheus's Head ❯ Alfeegi Gets a Haircut ( Chapter 6 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
Okay. Every time I set down to write this chapter, something intervenes, I get distracted and I end up writing something completely different. This is my third attempt to write this story. Look at the title. Alfeegi gets a haircut. Today, by hook or by crook, Alfeegi will get a haircut and we all know what that means. Alfeegi + haircut = third-best looking Dragon Officer.

All feedback is gratefully appreciated. I can't write better unless I know what I'm doing right and what I'm doing wrong.

Warning! Tetheus is a pervert. If you don't like perverted Tetheuses, look away now.

As always, italics are Tetheus's thoughts.

The bed is soft. Feathers stuff the quilt above and the mattress below. The warmth of two bodies heats the covers. Sunlight peeks in through a chink in the curtains to light the scene. Clothes are strewn around the bed, left as they fell the night before. Tetheus stirs as the body beside him moves to face him and a voice like satin speaks.

"You have to get up soon."

He turns only his head.

"I'm too sick to go to work. I've come down with terminal exhaustion."
"Which I suppose you'll blame on me?"

The couple lapse into silence. Tetheus relaxes and focuses on the heart beating near his own. An arm lazily encircles his body and a cheek presses itself to his chest.
"So is it true? Did you really sleep with him?"
"Yes. Why is that so hard for you to believe?"

The body slides over him, the friction providing a pleasant heat.
"Alfeegi won't be impressed."

Tetheus closes his eyes and stretches his head back.
"Alfeegi's very hard to impress."

The weight shifts, then leaves his body. Tetheus flicks open his eyes and grabs the shoulder of the one leaving his bed. His lips trail kisses over the smooth skin as he murmurs.
"You know, terminal exhaustion can be highly contagious. The only cure is prolonged bed rest."

A sharp laugh echoes throughout the untidy chamber and a softly mocking voice calls down to him.
"Unlike you, the castle would fall apart if I wasn't around."

Tetheus reaches up and draws a face down to his lips.
"Let it. For today. Let the whole thing fall down."

His kisses are eagerly returned, but the body does not unstiffen. His hands roam and probe the secret places, yet his companion continues, slowly, to rise from the bed. Tetheus is left grasping at empty air as he watches clothing rise from the floor to adorn the body of the one standing before him. Somehow, this is far more erotic than the act of removing them was.
"How do I get you to stay?"
"You can call me when you've recovered from your exhaustion."

The fully dressed figure returns to the bed and grabs his head in both hands. The kiss is long and passionate, but as Tetheus reaches up to hold his lover, once again, the figure disengages. Tetheus vainly watches the graceful walk to his dresser. His hairbrush is examined and the voice tuts disapprovingly.
"Do you ever wash this?"
The washing bowl is filled with water from the pitcher beside it and the brush is shaken into it. Softly and slowly the brush rises and falls, as it runs through the silken hair. Then the brush is discarded and with a final glance, the visitor walks over to the door. There, she pauses and looks back at Tetheus.
"Alfeegi was in town yesterday. He paid a visit to that Alchemist."

Tetheus strokes the bed and unleashes his sexiest bedroom eyes.
"Did he get something for his impotence?"
"No. But he did get the address of a good hairdresser."

Bedroom eyes swiftly turn into poker eyes.

"He wasn't sure, after all, he's had the same haircut for the last..." she pauses. "I think he was born with that haircut. Anyway, I managed to convince him that it was time for something new. You'll have to be fast to pay your respects. He said that he was heading down first thing."

She waits after she's pulled the door shut. A loud thump indicates that Tetheus is not best pleased with her news and is hurrying to get to Alfeegi before he heads out. Cernozoa smiles.
"That'll teach you to ditch me for Ruwalk."

That wench! Damn I have to rush. Curse you Alfeegi, why do you have to be such an early bird? I could already be too late!

Tetheus leaps out of the bed and wrenches open the chest of drawers. He grabs the first pair of trousers his hands fall onto and tries to stick his legs into them while making his way across the floor to his wardrobe. After a few hopeless hops, he loses balance and hits the floor with a loud thump.


He manages to right himself and spends a few precious moments pulling up his trousers before attempting to reach the wardrobe once more.
Socks? Nah, I can come back for them afterwards too. All I need is a shirt and my shoes. I can get away without a belt too.

The wardrobe contains hanger after hanger of neat shirts, immaculately collected, each one neatly pressed in place, with none extending beyond its brother. Tetheus's mad panic pulls several out of place while the chosen shirt nearly loses one of its buttons as he tries to pull it on.
Damn. Why do I have to button up each of these shirts before I put it back in the wardrobe? Can't I have left even one undone?
Tetheus's fingers turn to thumbs as he struggles with the buttons.
And since when did these buttons become so damn hard to open? Has Rath been in here with superglue again?
The judicious application of teeth, combined with much swearing allows Tetheus to finally open the shirt and yank it on. His gaze falls to the neatly ordered shoes and he delicately hooks out a pair of unworn slip-ons with his toes, before sliding his feet inside. All the while he is buttoning his shirt, which has become no easier. A final dash to his chest of drawers and Tetheus slows down. He admires himself in the mirror first, then reaches out and opens a tin on the countertop. A nearby comb is gingerly dipped into the tin, which is half-full of some sort of goop and then carefully combed through his hair. The reflection in the mirror is breathing heavily, does not have his shirt tucked in, but his hair is perfect. Tetheus raises a final hand to his barnet, checks the sides and then runs for the door.

Now, if I was Alfeegi...It's early morning and I want to go into town for a haircut. Before I go I want to... Tetheus ponders, ...get all my shouting done. The knights aren't home, Kai-Stern's away, that leaves Lykouleon and Ruwalk. They'd be in their studies or the library about now... Tetheus raises a hand to his chin. The library's closest to the front gate, I guess that's my best bet.

Decision made, Tetheus races off in the direction of the library, his shirt flapping in the breeze. I hope this run doesn't muss my hair.

The library door is closed, but not for long. The image of a heavily panting, unkempt, sweating Tetheus fills the entrance and scares the hell out of poor Ruwalk who was minding his own business. He backs up against the wall as the hulking form of the Chief of Security approaches him.
"Now, Tetheus. I know that what we had was special to you, but I think I've made it quite clear that..."
"Have you...seen...Alfeegi." Tetheus's breath falls heavily from his mouth. Darn. Last night must have taken a lot more out of me than I thought. It had been quite a while, I think I overextended myself. You really should loosen up and stretch before those kind of gymnastics. Mental note: In future, stretch and limber up before accepting Cernozoa's invitations to talk.
Ruwalk's mouth opens and closes a few times before he answers. "You're looking for Alfeegi?"
"Yes." More heavy breathing. Tetheus reaches out an arm and braces himself against the wall, unaware that he's pinning Ruwalk as he does so. "Is...he...still...here?"
Tetheus merely nods, his face growing closer and closer to Ruwalk as his strength wanes. Ruwalk's clearly growing uncomfortable, but doesn't attempt to escape. In fact, he merely holds his book to his chest to protect himself from Tetheus. The title can therefore be clearly seen.

Mating Habits of Various Exotic Peoples

Tetheus's head drops until his nose touches the book, moving it from side to side he reads the title. Mating Habits of What? Thinking of me? If only I didn't have a more pressing matter. "Alfeegi?"
"I'm afraid he's gone. He should be back before supper."
"Then I'm...too...late."

Tetheus slowly swings himself away from Ruwalk until his back hits the wall. His eyes rise to view the ceiling as he slowly slides down onto his haunches. His heavy breathing continues unchanged.
"Tetheus, are you all right?"
Tetheus lowers his eyes to Ruwalk. Huh? You actually look pretty concerned, I'm touched. I don't look that bad do I?
"You look pretty dishevelled and you never look untidy. You can't breathe properly and you can't even stand." He smiles weakly. "I could finally beat you at arm wrestling."
Tetheus looks at him a little longer before answering. I think that you're incredibly sexy from this angle. I wish you'd nurse me back to health. "Sick. Taking day off."
"Of course. I'll tell the Dragonlord. Do you need some help getting back to your room?"
He nods. "Give me...minute."
"Whenever you're ready." Ruwalk squeezes Tetheus's shoulder before settling down with his book. He casts furtive glances at Tetheus every now and again, each of which is noted and catalogued by the Black Dragon Officer. Worry. Worry. Fear. Protective. Want? Is that lust? Boredom. Guess the book isn't that exotic. Curiosity. Worry again. Oh well, I guess I could make it back now.

As Tetheus straightens up, Ruwalk closes his book and hurries over. He pulls Tetheus to his feet and then inserts himself under Tetheus's arm, which fits neatly around his shoulders. Hmm? You're the perfect height for me Ruwalk, just tall enough to look me easily in the eye and just short enough for me to tower over you. And my arm fits so snugly around your shoulders. I can get a good view of your arse if I lean back too. The two stagger up to Tetheus's room, which stuns Ruwalk with its state of disarray.

Tetheus tries momentarily to fumble with the buttons, but instead kicks off his shoes and crawls onto the bed. Ruwalk stares at the room. Clothing from the night before is still scattered around, the chest of drawers is open and has identical pairs of trousers escaping from it, and the wardrobe is perfectly neat, except for one glaring wound.

"That'll crease." His voice trails off as he wanders over to Tetheus and sits on the edge of the bed. "Tetheus, do you want me to send over the healer?"
Tetheus murmurs back from where he's buried in the pillow. "Sleep fine."

Ruwalk reaches out his hand, but pauses inches from Tetheus's hair. Maybe a few memories of their night of passion, or else the shine coming off the goop, stays his hand.
"Is there anything you want?"
Will I risk it?

No answer is given to him and he stands and makes for the door. Tetheus's voice stops him before he can leave.
"You're welcome to stay."

Tetheus can't see Ruwalk's smile, but he hears his soft caramel voice promise to look in on him later. The next thing he hears is the door's close, just before he falls asleep

What's that noise? Cup. I just wanna go back to the bunnies. Mmm tomato. Way cup. It's buzzing and annoying. Stop. Wake up. What's going on? "Tetheus Wake up!" Huh, what? umph? Huh?

Tetheus's eyes finally open and see Cernozoa stretched out beside him.
"Finally. I thought I was going to wait here shouting at you until Alfeegi came home."
"Huh?" Tetheus raises a hand to shade his eyes from the sun's glare and to hide them from Cernozoa. "Alfeegi's not back yet?"
"No, and you were like the dead. I was starting to wonder if I'd actually killed you last night. Ruwalk was like all," her voice changes consistency to a velvet caramel, but she fails to capture his essence. Still, Tetheus recognises some of his mannerisms and vocal ticks. "Tetheus is never sick and yet he practically collapsed on me. Poor guy, he must be working too hard." Cernozoa eyes Tetheus at this and reaches over him to plant a loud and wet kiss on his lips. "Working far too hard were we?"
"God yes." He laughs. "The boss is a slave driver." And she wields a mean whip. I can't remove my shirt until those scars heal and I was hoping to give one or two lovely ladies a cheap thrill at the next training session. He flexes his back muscles under the covers, revelling in the sharp sting caused by the welts.
"So, why'd you talk to Alfeegi?"

Cernozoa sits up in anger and her eyes flare.
"Are you kidding me? You dumped me for a night with Ruwalk, which isn't fine anyway, even if he is, but you left me tied up all night! I still have rope burns on my wrists you daft bastard!" Her voice rises as she speaks, until she's almost screeching. Tetheus reaches out and grabs her wrists. He lavishes kisses at them before dragging her down to lie beside him.
"I'm sorry. I should've made an excuse and come to untie you before shagging him senseless. You wouldn't believe what happened that night."
"Why? How good was he?" Her voice is still bitter.
"I mean with all the..." I can't tell her about what happened, the secretaries of the dragonlord have an image to maintain. Just because Ruwalk nearly lost himself in a game of cards, and shagged the Dragonqueen, and me, and signed goodness knows what before I found him. Ooh reminds me. "Hey look in the top drawer and bring out the piece of paper you find there."

Cernozoa looks a little sceptical but does as he asks. He props himself up on an elbow and watches her. As she sits back down he gives her the good news.
"That is the deed to the Dragon Castle. It's mine. So what part do you want?"
"Seriously?" She opens the paper and reads it carefully. "What'd you do to get this?" She eyes the prone form of the dragon officer. "What deviant position did you try out on that poor boy?"
"I won it back, fair and square, in a game of cards. I don't know if Lykouleon knows it exists, but I reckon it makes the castle safe. If I give it back to him, then Ruwalk might just gamble it away again."
"That's a circular argument. You're holding onto it and not telling the Dragonlord, in order to keep it safe?"
"Exactly. If he asks, or I want to build a squash court," in Alfeegi's bedroom, "then I'll tell him."
"I'll think about what bit I want then." Cernozoa folds the deed up again and replaces it. When she turns back Tetheus has his hands under his head and is staring at the ceiling.
If Alfeegi comes back with a good haircut, I've got a lot of ground to make up. Is there any way to improve on Tetheus? Can my incredibly sexy body be made any sexier?
"Maybe I should go to this hairdresser?"
"You what?"
"Maybe I should get a haircut."

Cernozoa reaches out and teases a strand of his hair.
"But it's only just now gotten long enough. If you cut it, it'd look awful."
"I need to try something new though."
"Idiot. All you need to do is stop using so much of that pomade."

He sits up and stares at her. "But then it'd be untidy. It'd get in my eyes and I'd look messy, not sexy."
Cernozoa smiles. "Sometimes a little untidy can be very sexy. Wanna try out a new image?"
"You mean something worse than having untidy hair?"
"Let me try something. Get up."

Tetheus grumbles, but allows himself to be dragged from the bed. He undresses and Cernozoa throws some underwear at him, but only after eyeing his naked form. Tetheus obliges her by striking a few mandatory poses.
"You're chirpy again."
"I don't need that much sleep. Those few hours were enough."
He stretches, showing off the many, taut muscles that adorn his body. He then insists on placing all his dirty clothing into his wash basket before allowing Cernozoa to seat him in front of his mirror and start his transformation. Using a wet hairbrush and a towel she removes most of his pomade and styles it into a more natural looking do. Tetheus purses his lips, unsure. He shakes his head a few times and eventually the hair falls into his eyes. When he glares at Cernozoa triumphantly, she reminds him that no matter how much goop was in his hair, that was bound to happen.
It doesn't look that bad. I've got a continual urge to pat it back into place though. I'll try it for today. If more than six people check me out, then I'll keep it.

"Next, colour."
That shocks him. "I like my haircolour."
"So do I", Cernozoa assures him, "but I was talking about your clothes."
"No offence, but everything you own looks like a military uniform. We need to try something a little more casual, a little more contemporary."
"You just want to play dress-up with a new doll," he accuses her.
She smiles straight back at him. "I never got to play with a male doll before. Please? I'll make you look pretty."
What choice do I have if I want to beat Alfeegi? "All right then. Are we going shopping?"
"I thought that we could borrow Alfeegi's wardrobe, while he's out."
"Are you kidding? I don't want to look like Alfeegi."
"How about Ruwalk then, he always dresses well?"
"And he's shorter than I am, so nothing'll fit."
"A shopping trip it is then." Cernozoa clasps her hands together. "There's some stuff I could do with too. Bring your chequebook."
Tetheus eyes her coldly. "I will bring a modest sum of money and that will be sufficient."
"We could wait for Alfeegi's return..."
"A modest sum."
"Modest it is."

The two of them travel into the town. Tetheus heads straight for Military Clothing by Goss, but Cernozoa steers him to a trendier and much girlier shop, run by a fussy middle-aged biddy.

"Why are we here?" he whispers to her.
"Shh. This is where Ruwalk gets all his clothes made. Just stand in the centre there and let me work."

Tetheus stands as he is bidden while Cernozoa and the tailor, Mrs. Cosmopolite throw various bolts of clothing over his shoulder and discuss styles. All of his protests are ignored as the girls focus on their discussion of grandad shirts, mandarin collars, darts and pleats. Pleats! Finally, Tetheus is measured by the over-familiar woman and ordered by Cernozoa to pay up.

"Hang on, exactly what am I paying for?"

Cernozoa sighs at this display of bad manners, but Mrs. Cosmopolite unravels bolt after bolt and talks in dressmaker at him. Tetheus ignores her words and hopes she's kind to him, but forcefully refuses the puce trousers and cerise tank top. Mrs. Cosmopolite agrees to replace these items with a sensible navy outfit, albeit one with a print. She then promises faithfully to deliver the first of the outfits within the next few days and Tetheus pays over a modest deposit. This sum includes something taffeta for Cernozoa. I always thought that was some sort of food.

Tetheus and Cernozoa are quiet on the journey back to the castle. It's easy to look well in a uniform. Casual is something that can only be pulled off by certain people. Ahh. Fashion is a minefield. Ruwalk pays a lot of money every month to a stylist so that he looks good. And every full moon he gets his nails done. I really don't want to traipse down that road. It's far too much effort for too little reward. He shakes his head. Then again. Ruwalk is the most desired man in the castle. Maybe a little care spent on one's appearance can yield dividends.

There is a small group of dragon fighters gathered in the entrance hall as they arrive. Yes, no, no, nice ass. Hmm, maybe it's time for a new uniform. After all, those trousers could be tighter by a considerable amount. As Tetheus and Cernozoa walk past, a voice from the group calls him back. As he turns around the first thing he sees is Alfeegi's petite, elfin face staring out at him, from underneath an incredibly ugly hat.

That hat! Typical Alfeegi, gets a haircut then buys an ugly hat...I wonder, is he bald underneath it? Nah. I'd never get that lucky.

"Tetheus. Feeling better?"

Tetheus runs his fingers wearily through his hair. For once, there is no grease build-up on his fingers. Point in its favour.
"Much better thank you."
"That's good to hear. Ruwalk was a little worried, but you seem fine to me."
Tetheus inclines his head and then asks the burning question. "So, what's with the hat?"

Alfeegi sighs and then, with an uncomfortable look on his face, he slowly removes the hat. The hair that was tucked up into it slides down back around his face. The cut is unchanged, however, there is one, small, tiny, difference.

"It's blue."
"It's green!"
"Are you blind? It's green!"

The dragons split into two groups, the green faction and the blue faction. Alfeegi sighs again at them before turning to Tetheus.
"It was like this the entire way home. Blue, no green. Mister? Is your hair blue or green?"
Tetheus squeezes his shoulders. "So is this what Kharl's friend suggested?"
"Oh no." Alfeegi looks horrified. "He had a huge plan and it sounded really good when he explained it to me. A small colour, something vibrant and exciting, then a sexy, new, dignified haircut. Well!" He puffs himself up slightly and gains a half-inch, "when I saw this in the mirror, I refused point blank to allow him to go any further and I marched right out of there. I should've just stuck with what I knew. Hairdressers are just full of hot air. I only hope that this washes out."
And I only hope that it doesn't.