Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ My Funny TURK ❯ Welcome the New Recruit ( Chapter 1 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]
I have some good news and bad news... but I'll give you the bad one first. I won't be continuing my first AeReno ficcie, Innocent Seduction , due to some personal issues. I deeply apologize to all the eager readers, who have been patient with me for months in wait of the next chapter, but it pains me to tell you that... but perhaps one day... Oh, nevermind.

The good news is THIS ficcie!! I'm excited to work on this one 'cause it's an AeReno romantic comedy to make up for IS. It's another AU, but a little light-hearted this time--hence the genres. It's still in the planning stages, so there's possible OOC-ness in the future. Please enjoy this one! *bow deeply* Thank you, and I regret any inconveniences I may have caused you. =6.6=

Squaresoft owns Final Fantasy VII... And the following song is "Pushing the Sky" by Seatbelts from the Cowboy Bebop Movie. It's a wicked song that I recommend to anyone who enjoys the CB series or loves rock music! It was just PERFECT for Aeris and Reno, with them being err, special agents and all!!


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[ Tuesday morning, 8:59:10 am. Midgar. Slums. Sector Six: Wall Street Market, Pretty Flower Shoppe. ]

On the dot of nine o'clock that morning, the sign to the little, flower shoppe flipped over from 'closed' to 'open' by a woman in her early forties. Her hair was the color of dark-brown, swaying loosely behind her as she oped the shoppe door wide for the start of the business day. Putting on a frilly, white apron, she stepped out onto the sidewalk and inhaled the lovely morning, despite it being the slums. She went out farther from the store and then looked up at the two-story store, where the top half was actually the family residence. She noticed the opened window, and the morning music drifting into the streets,

'Don't wanna be the one to pop your cherry, girl...
Just jump a train that will bring you back to mama's side...'

"Sweetie," she called up to the room, "aren't you supposed to be going now?!"

There was a loud crash, causing the woman to cringe, but a reassuring voice told her, "YEAH!! I'm just about done, mother!!"

'Knock on, knock on,
Knock on the sky.
You keep on knockin', better ask yourself why...'


~ An Aeris & Reno Romantic Comedy ~

My Funny TURK

written by K-chan


Mission One: Welcome the New Recruit


[ Tuesday morning, 10:15:55 am. TURK-I (TURK Institional Headquarters): third floor, restricted area, main lounge. ]

A red-head plopped onto the comfortable couch, yawning tiredly at having to get up at that time for work even though they haven't had any assignments in the past week. The radio on the low coffee table played quietly in the background as Reno stretched his arms into the air and sprawled across the length of the couch selfishly while his partner strolled over to the counter, where the coffee machine was, and made himself a cup. Rude glanced back at the lazy TURK, who was about to snore away at headquarters and decided that he should make another cup too, but this special one would be caffeinated.

'Knock on, knock on,
Knock on the door.
Buyin' a one way ticket out of your mind.
Knock on, knock on,
Knock on the sky.
You keep on knockin', better ask yourself why.

"Man, this sucks," Reno said, tucking a pillow cushion behind his head, with his eyes closed, "Where's all the excitement??! I could just walk into the boss's office and DEMAND some work!"

"That would be a first time," the tall man remarked. He poured the hot coffee into each mug and then took one over to Reno, setting it the coffee table. "But I'm surpised YOU're complaining." He carefully sipped his coffee and decided to sit at the round table to the side of the room to read the newspaper while Reno ignored the morning beverage and reached for the radio, turning it up a bit louder.

'You keep pushin'.
You will see my chilly, yellow eyes,
Only one more time.'

The music boomed noisely in the lounge and the nearby area, nearly causing Rude to choke on the coffee,

'Don't wanna get your teddy bear mad at me, girl...
So get your pretty slippers on and dance out of here now...'

He glared at Reno, but the red-hear was already immersed in the music with his eyes closed and his head bobbing slightly to the catchy rhythm.

'Knock on, knock on,
Knock on the sky.
You keep on knockin', better ask yourself why...'

But thankfully, a blond woman appeared from the hallway, looking distraught into the room. She stalked in and went straight for the radio and turned it off. Reno immediately looked up and saw Elena glaring down at him, "Hey, babe." She was not amused with his antics nor his nonchalant attitude and continued to glare at him. "Oh, you're gettin' older by the second lookin' like that," he chuckled, sitting up. He grabbed the coffee mug and sipped it.

Elena snorted and sat down across from him on the empty couch, folding her arms over her chest, "Have you guys heard?"

"Heard what?" Reno asked, putting the mug back on the table top.

"There's a new recruit coming in today."

"What?! Another?! What's the deal?! YOU just got in not even a month ago, and now we've got another??" He brushed his hands through his wild hair in frustration, "I don't get it! We haven't gotten a job in days, but we're putting more on the pay roll!"

"And YOU're complaining?" the blonde retorted, "When we DO have an assignment, you do your best to ditch it! Reno, you're a man with MANY problems!"

"Hey!" he pouted at the offense. "I have preferences, ya know. I'll put all my effort into the case if it falls under one of three categories: women, booze, or gambling." He chuckled, leaning back casually, "It would be a dream to have all three in ONE case."

Elena groaned wearily, "Like I said, you're a man with many, MANY problems. Why did they EVER let you become a TURK, I'll never know."

"'Cause I'm irresistable!" He kicked his feet up onto the table, "So what's this new recruit like? Guy or girl?"

She shrugged, "Don't know. I haven't meet her, or him, yet. News spread fast in this building."

"Hmm... well, i hope it's a girl. We need a female touch to this group." As quickly as the comment left his mouth, the fist of a furious Elena greeted him after that, sending him and the HEAVY couch flying into the wall. Rude stood up, staring at the powerful punch, and made a mental note not to piss off their female comrade. He continued to stand there stiffly, when suddenly Elena whipped her head to him and glared. Sweating under her terrible gaze, he reseated himself and sipped his coffee as if nothing had happened. Elena crinkled her nose in a frown and then sat back down, grabbing a magazine from the table, and began to flip through it.

"Aawe man," Reno groaned, climbing back to an upright position, and adjusting his jaw, "That just proved it." Elena's hands trembled and unintentionally ripped the magazine in half, and she was now glaring straight at him again, but Reno just smiled smuggly, rubbing his injury. Rude noticed the tense situation from behind his dark shades and remained silent. He eventually thank the gods when Tseng appeared, staring at Elena then Reno... Elena, then Reno... and shook his head, not wanting to know.

Tseng coughed to get their attention, and Reno stood up eagerly, "So, who's the newbie?!" The dark-haired man gave him a brief, odd look before moving to the side to present the new recruit stepping through the doorway. Reno blinked, along with the other two, at the young brunette with eyes of emerald. She stood next to Tseng with her hands clasped behind her back, wearing the usual TURK suit of dark-blue, but her braided hair was tied back with a pink ribbon that didn't match her outfit. She still contrasted the mad besider her greatly with her bright smile and short stature. "Hi!" she chirped, giving a little wave.

"Ya... umm... she... wha..." came Reno's confused voice, "Hi." She was a cutie, but she couldn't be the new TURK. She looked too innocent, too naive--just not TURK material. Or maybe she could just be the new secretary, or intern at least! Yeah, that's it, and then he could flirt with her every day if he wanted too. He smiled to himself, and that just got everyone wondering what in the world was going on in his head.

"This is Aeris Gainsborough," Tseng introduced, "She will be our fifth member."

"NO WAY!" Reno and Elena shouted simultaneously. "This's a joke, right?!" the red-head continued while Aeris looked at him oddly, not understanding why he couldn't take the information so easily. "There's no way she can be a TURK. She's... she's just too cute and innocent, which I don't mind, but still!"

Aeris giggled while Tseng said, "It's not a joke. Aeris is now a TURK."

"Besides," Rude piped in as he went to refill his coffee mug, "April Fool's Day isn't until another two and half months."

Reno glared at his back and said sarcastically, "Thank you for the reminder."

"And since you seem so enthusiastic about it," Tseng directed his sentence to Reno, "I will let you show Aeris around and fill her in on our rules." Not even hesitating, he nodded in comprehension and looked over at Aeris. Tseng continued, "Rude, Elena, see me in my first in thirty minutes."

"Yes, sir!" they saluted.


'Knock on, knock on,
Knock on the door.
Be happy living in your nuclear life.
Knock on, knock on,
Knock on the sky.
You keep on knockin', better ask yourself why...'


[ Very late morning (or almost the afternoon), 11:57:03 am. TURK-I Headquarters: first floor, west wing, unrestricted area, cafeteria. ]

About every five minutes, he would steal a glance at her profile out of the corner of her eye and smile. She was too absorbed in their tour to notice his happy, roaming eyes. She was definitely a looker, and the blue suit was more appealing on her fine figure than Elena's. So maybe having her around won't be so bad, but he still couldn't get it out of his head that she was an official TURK. Sure, the agency had lots of employees, but only four had been given the title of TURK, and now it was five with Aeris. Even so, he knew Elena went through a lot of intense training as he and Rude did, but Aeris was just too fragile to go through what he and others did.

They stopped in front of some glass doors, and he gestured to the area beyond the panes, where people were already crowding into, "And this is the cafeteria. Hmm, lunch hour already?"

"Ooh, perfect timing!" she said, clasping her hand together with glee, "Let's get lunch then!" She then grabbed his arm and pulled him inside. She looked around until she spotted the line and proceeded over there, still holding onto his arm. He was smiling the whole time, letting her pull him along.

They waited patiently in line with her at times on tippy toes so she could peer over the crowd at the day's menu, and Reno took this chance to find out more about her, "So Aeris... why did you join the TURKs?"

"Hmm?" She looked at him. "Well, I never thought about it before, but since the chief asked, I did."

"What?" He stared at her if she had suddenly transformed into a man that instant, "You mean the head of the TURKs division ASKED you to join us??!"

She nodded and thought it over, "Okay, he may not of asked..." Reno smirked at the retracted statement, knowing it was too good to be true, but she said musingly, "He was actually BEGGING my mother to let me join."

He facefaulted and quickly recover to ask, "Why?? I still want to know why someone so innocent-looking as you would be begged to join a high-trained group as us?? It doesn't make sense."

"I guess not," she shrugged, "But you shouldn't let appearances fool you, Reno." She smiled and continued down the line, leaving him to wonder about her advice and to stare after her figure. Being Reno after all, his eyes wandered a bit low to her... "Reno, c'mon!" she called back for him to hurry up.

'You keep pushin'.
You will feel my frozen, beastly bite,
Only one more time.

Pushing the sky...'


Next Mission... Never Hit a Girl (or You'll Regret It)...

Assignments are coming in like crazy! But with Rude and Elena off doing their jobs, it's up to Reno and Aeris to deal with a kidnapping case that involves the Shinras, the wealthiest and most influential family on the Planet--not to mention the TURKs' sponsor! Aeris is really excited with her first mission, but Reno has a bad feeling, now that he has to look out for her since she's still new and all, but will he really NEED to... And why was Aeris REALLY hired?? Well, he's just about to find out...


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Okay, so my humor may be a little different than everyone else's, but hopefully, it will get funnier... Anyway please review, okies? It just let's me know who's interested in this new light-hearted series. Thanksie!

Oh and check out the cover for this ficcie: << http://www.mediaminer.org/fanart/view.php?id=17675 >>! =^-^=