Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ Sowing the SeeDs ❯ Chapter 14

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Sowing the SeeDs : Part 14

a fanfic by Greenbeans <gbeans@tyrlen.org>
with His lordship Chaos <hislordshipchaos@hotmail.com>
edited by Helen Fong <iriachan@yahoo.com>
based on the world of Final Fantasy 8
created by Square Electronic Arts L.L.C. <www.squaresoft.com>



The clear sky above was the first thing Quistis saw when she leapt from
the transport to the awaiting dock. Looking around her it quickly became
apparent that this part of Centra most definitely was not like the region she
lived in. Kei gave out a shrill whistle to catch her attention before tossing
her bag to her. Quistis caught the duffel easily and swung it over her
shoulder.

"So this is where you grew up?" Quistis caught up with Xu, who was
helping to load a shipment of products from the north into the back of a truck.

Her mentor nodded silently while securing the load.

Kei came up behind them. "I hate this place."

"Can't imagine why," Enju agreed dryly from his spot leaning against the
truck's bumper. "If this world had a 'nowhere' I think we just found the
middle of it. And it's a frigging desert to boot."

There was no denying that assertion. It wasn't a desert in such a way
that there was sand everywhere, but the landscape looked anything but
hospitable. She knelt down briefly to feel the soil. It's dry, grainy texture
hinted at the rarity of water. How could a clan of vegetarians survive on such
infertile land?

Once they were underway Quistis intently watched their approach of the
clan compound out the window of the van they rode in. It stood out like a fort
in the middle of an open plain. Towering walls constructed of hard clay bricks
kept the dangers of the wilderness at bay. Up on an observation deck, a lone
lookout monitored their progress.

Her eyes followed a road that trailed off to the side of the compound.
Carefully maintained crops stretched out across acres of land. Even from this
distance she could see the sophisticated farming equipment used to tend the
fields. Survival was a strong motivator for keeping up with technologies that
could mean the difference between life and death.

It had taken a small convoy of vehicles to transport them from the port
to the compound. From Quistis' perspective it appeared as though most everyone
was out to greet the newcomers and welcome the lost children home. The
vehicles pulled off the side of the hard packed gravel road 20 meters away from
the compound entrance.

Confused as to why they stopped short, she followed those from the Garden
out of the van they were riding in. Kren and his friends were already walking
towards the compound gate. Quistis made to catch up with them, but Xu held her
back with a hand on her shoulder.

"They have to go through first," she said solemnly.

Quistis gave her a puzzled look, "Why?"

"Their coming of age trial goes from the time they leave the gate until
they return through it," Xu explained. "We don't want to interfere with the
rite any more than we already have."

"Oh..."

"They still don't beat my record," Kei said smugly.

"I doubt anyone is going to beat the three years you were gone," Xu said
with a hint of humor.

Quistis knew that statement caused a pang of sorrow for Xu (though it
wasn't meant to). She could only hope that they would some day find more lost
Anshin, but the chances of that were slim. To have Kei's record beaten by one
of them would be an event everyone celebrated.

The vehicles they rode in were pulled around to another entrance, leaving
the nine of them there. Each of the Anshin children passed the threshold of
the gate individually and reunited with their family. Xu and Kei were the next
to go forward. The people seemed just as pleased to see them as they were to
have the children back. She and Enju followed the two SeeDs without comment.

Those gathered around tried not to gawk at Enju, who stood taller than
everyone around him did. Even more embarrassing was that she stood taller than
a good many of them. She'd never been the only blonde in a sea of dark haired
people before. Balamb Garden was so diverse that being in the midst of a
people that were so ethnically pure left her feeling uncomfortable. What a
surprise Balamb must have been when Xu first arrived there!

Off to the side, Kren spotted her and Enju. He took hold of a woman's
hand and gently pulled her over to them. After bowing respectfully to Enju, he
turned his attention to Quistis.

"Kwis, my mother," he introduced.

Quistis bowed to her as she'd seen Xu do on occasion and then offered her
hand to shake. The confused woman took hold at Kren's prompting. He then
spoke for a few minutes gesturing to both Quistis and Enju. The woman's eyes
grew wide during the story, and he was quick to reassure her.

Kei took notice of their discussion and came over. Kren introduced her
as well. The woman seemed to fear Kei. (A response many people had with
regards to the intimidating SeeD, but there was more to it than what those at
the Garden exhibited). Kei accepted this with the nonchalance of someone who
was used to having such an effect on people. A young boy tugging on her hand
pulled her away again. Quistis found herself grinning at the rarely seen
expression of fondness that Kei showed towards the boy and his antics.

With polite interest Quistis watched the Anshin being reunited with their
families. She was a stranger here, a foreigner. She felt like a voyeur
witnessing their moments of joy. The fact that she didn't have a family of her
own to share such a homecoming with didn't bother her. Her friends were her
family.

Glancing around her she found Xu with two people who she assumed were her
friend's parents. Not far away several people younger than Kei and a man in
elaborate dress surrounded her. Silently, Enju slipped his hand into Quistis'
and gave it a firm squeeze. Looking up at him there was a tightness to his
lips that Quistis couldn't justify. Were these reunions hurting him? Was it
wrong that she felt no grief? She didn't think so...

Xu saw them hiding in the crowd and motioned for them to join her. Enju
didn't release her hand as they walked. A small part of Quistis had to admit
that she was grateful for the confidence that holding his hand gave her.

"Quistis, Enju, meet my mother and father," she introduced. Xu's father
stood taller than Quistis, but barely. He had a long braid of graying hair
trailing behind him. Xu's mother was even more petite than Xu (if such a thing
was possible). The woman smiled kindly at them before pulling Quistis into a
hug. She said something that Quistis knew was well intended, but didn't
understand.

"She's glad to meet the person who's been like a sister to our daughter,"
Xu's father said with a thick accent. "As am I. Please be welcome in our
home."

Xu flushed some at her parent's admission. "Mother doesn't speak
standard fluently, but she tries." She said, trying to divert attention
elsewhere.

"The hard-assed SeeD has a soft spot, does she?" Enju teased Xu lightly.
Their mutual fondness of Quistis wasn't a secret, but it allowed him the chance
to take a poke at the sometimes-uptight Instructor.

"I feel the same way," Quistis replied.

They chatted for a few minutes before Kei joined them. The well-dressed
man followed on her heels. She introduced him as her father and as a clan
elder. Quistis refrained from eyeballing him and his clothing. She knew there
was some unease between father and daughter, though the nature of their
disagreement was something that had never been clarified for her. Seeing them
together, Quistis could tell where Kei got her pride. It radiated in the way
they carried themselves.

"I thank you for being a guide to Kren during his time out there," he
said to Quistis after the connection had been pointed out. "It's obvious that
the Spirits keep good company if you're able to attract three of them to you."

Quistis wasn't sure what to make of that statement. Kei's explanation of
Anshin mythology had been maddeningly brief. Now she was up to her neck in
their culture and didn't know where to begin with asking questions!

Kei made a muffled noise of disagreement then cleared her throat to cover
it. "Have the sleeping arrangements been figured out yet?"

"Your aunt and uncle have asked to host our young friend along with Xu.
You and Enju will stay with us," the elder outlined. "Have you any
objections?"

Enju leaned over to Xu to 'whisper' a question to her. "Does Kei snore?"

Having heard that, Kei made another disgruntled noise and crossed her
arms.

"There is a banquet tonight to celebrate this joyous occasion," he
concluded.

"We'd better get ready then," Xu said. "Come on, Quistis, we need to
change clothes."

She and Xu followed her parents back to Xu's childhood home. Gravel
paths criss-crossed to create a network of destinations. There weren't many
trees around that Quistis could see. A majority of the plant life grew no
taller than mid-thigh, but there was an abundance of it. She decided that this
place wasn't as attractive as Balamb Garden was, but held its own measure of
beauty. Even more so, she felt an inexplicable sense of peace from her
surroundings.

The home they entered was smaller than many they passed along the way.
But if there were only three people living here, that made sense. A narrow
lawn lined the front of the house. There were no distinguishing
characteristics to the building itself, not even a house number as far as
Quistis could tell. She took careful note of the landmarks in the immediate
area so that she could find this place again.

In the corner of the residence furthest away from the door was Xu's room.
Even for a single occupant it was a small space. As Quistis suspected, it was
as devoid of personal belongings as Xu's quarters at the Garden were. Only a
few things caught her eye. A framed image of Xu and Kei as children sat on the
dresser. Next to that was a hand-sewn doll. The bed was neatly made without a
single crease in the covers.

Xu had gone over to the closet and was searching for something when
Quistis broke the silence with the first of many questions to come. "Why do we
have to change? I'm wearing my best uniform."

"Formal Anshin wear is appropriate for a banquet. Besides, it's more
comfortable."

The idea of something formal being more comfortable than the uniform she
was used to seemed to be a contradiction.

Xu pulled out an outfit that looked to be folds upon folds of cloth. She
held it out for Quistis to examine. "What do you think of blue and yellow?"

She couldn't make heads or tails of what Xu had in her hands. Indeed,
the fabric was a light blue and yellow. She said that the colors were fine,
but had her doubts regarding how to wear it or if it even fit her.

"They're one size fits all. Don't worry, I'll show you how to put it
on," Xu assured while finding one for herself.

The act of dressing took over a half-hour to accomplish -- and that
wasn't due to Quistis' ignorance. It simply took that long to get the clothes
into the proper folds and fastened. Once everything was said and done, she had
to admit that these clothes *were* more comfortable; being loose fitting and
yet secure.

While they were dressing was also the first time she had seen the
sprawling tattoo on her friend's back. She knew that Xu had a small one, but
it'd grown significantly since they were roommates. Quistis didn't ask. If Xu
wanted to say something, she would.

By the time they were finished getting ready Xu's parents had already
left for the event. The two of them went to Kei's house to meet up with her
and Enju. Kei was likewise dressed in Anshin clothing, though it wasn't the
same style as what she and Xu wore. Probably the male equivalent, knowing her.
Enju wore his Garden uniform.

"He's too tall," Kei explained while they walked to the meeting hall.

"Excuse me for growing," he retorted.

Xu chuckled lightly at his dilemma. "I have no doubt that my mother will
make you an outfit that accommodates your height before we leave."

"Why would she do that?" Quistis piped up.

"My mother's a craftswoman," Xu said with a small touch of pride.
"Making clothes is her specialty. The challenge of creating an outfit that
fits Enju would be reason enough for her to try. Even if we are only here for
a week."

"Ha! You'd let her do that? And here I thought you would try to leave
with a couple new dresses at least," Kei teased. "She can't make you dresses
if she's working on something for Enju."

Xu smiled slightly in acknowledgement of her hidden agenda. "Mother's
probably already made some for me."

Quistis absorbed this new insight. It now made sense why Xu was so
protective of her civilian clothes. They were more than just non-uniforms to
her, they were made by mother.

Xu continued her story by explaining how her and Kei's mothers would tag
team to keep their children in line. It was almost like having two mothers
because of it. Xu's mother helped her sister out by mending clothes and other
small tasks while Kei's mother tried to keep them from mischief (a near
impossible task Kei assured in an aside).

"Most of the mending that needed to be done was on Kei's clothes. I'm
not sure how she managed it, but if there was anything within five meters that
she could catch her trousers, it happened." Xu reflected.

"Just lucky I guess," Kei added without a hint of remorse. She fully
realized how much trouble she caused other people and didn't regret it.

"I feel sorry for your folks." It was the first thing Enju contributed
since they started down the path. Admittedly, Quistis felt for their mothers
as well. She had no trouble imagining Kei as a pint-sized terror.

The building they entered opened up to a large hall. Many round tables
spread out across the floor with a long table lining one side of the room.
That table held a myriad of colorful dishes.

"It's more of a potluck than a banquet," Enju observed.

He was right. The room already had a lot of people in it and she doubted
that they were the last to arrive. The tables were there for those who were
seriously intent on eating since there weren't nearly enough of them for all
the people. Groups stood around and talked while nibbling from food filled
plates. This was most definitely a social event.

"I should apologize for my father," Kei said. "The Anshin language only
has a word for 'large social gathering with food'. There's no distinction made
between a potluck, banquet, or even a large family getting together for
dinner."

Enju nodded his understanding as his scoped out the food table. He was
probably going to use the same plan she was: just put random things on the
plate and hope they tasted okay. Xu was helpful in pointing out things she
thought Quistis might like. Kei was helpful to Enju by pointing out things
that might kill him.

"You're not taking any of the foods Kei warns you against?" Quistis
whispered to him.

"Kei might not like me, but I don't think she's about to kill me in front
of her family members. In a case like this, I'm not about to ignore her
warning. The red things in that dish," he pointed to a bowl that looked to be
the mate of the one sitting next to it, "remind me of some hot peppers I had
once. Trust me: that's not the way you want to experience a vision. The stuff
in that bowl looks to be exactly the same thing except without the death
peppers. I'd assume that one was safer."

Ah, there was some method to his madness. Quistis took his advice and
avoided anything that appeared to have the 'death peppers' in it.

Xu followed Quistis in line. "Hmm, Quistis, you know how you would pat
someone on the back to congratulate them?"

"Yeah."

"Don't do it," Xu stated flatly. "Or, more precisely, don't do it
*here*," she placed her hand between Quistis' shoulder blades on her back.

"Wha-?" She was lost now.

"This is a coming of age celebration. Kind of like the ball SeeD has to
honor the graduates," Kei explained from her place in line behind Xu.

Enju, who was ahead of Quistis, turned to address them, "So this is when
you get your tattoos." He smiled knowingly before explaining to Quistis. "It
hurts like hell. Your body is not thanking you for the procedure. If you were
to pat them on the new tattoo they'd be less than pleased."

"Wait, Kren and his friends were tattooed? And all Anshin have to pass
this rite? That would mean..."

"You're the only person in the room who isn't marked," Xu finished.
"Children aren't allowed to join in tonight any more than cadets are in the
SeeD balls."

Quistis looked from Xu (who simply shrugged), to Enju (who was intently
studying something on his plate), to Kei (who had crossed her arms and was
scowling). "Even you, Kei?"

"Make no mistake, I'm still pissed about it," Kei said in a huff.

"But you will want to congratulate them," Xu continued. "Let me teach
you a few phrases."

While Xu coached Quistis, Kei and Enju wandered off to find an out of the
way place to stand and eat. It wasn't long before an aged man approached them.
Kei greeted him easily and introduced him as the head elder to Enju.

If Kei didn't miss her guess, the elder was working the room to see if
all was well with the clan. Such gatherings not only made the people feel more
united; it was a quick way to collect the latest gossip.

"It's surprising to see you two together," he commented thoughtfully
after pleasantries were exchanged. The old man spoke standard with little
accent.

Enju arched an eyebrow, especially since he'd never met this man before.
The elder gave a small smile before adding, "Your spirit shines brightly. The
two of you are opposites. It would be expected to see you fighting, not
enjoying an evening together."

"Oh, we've gotten in our share of fighting," Kei amended. "But once we
accepted our dislike of each other, our friendship began."

"You only tolerated me after you kicked my ass," Enju grumbled
good-naturedly. "I'm still biding my time before we have a rematch."

The smile on the old man's face grew, increasing the number of wrinkles
considerably. "So I see. Would you be willing to join me for tea before you
leave?"

Kei nodded. "We'd like that."

Enju's other eyebrow arched questioningly. He knew that part of the
reason he was brought along on this trip was so that he could speak with the
elders. So far, he was unimpressed. Kei's father struck him as a flake and
this leathery old man looked like he was going to keel over dead at any moment.

Xu joined their group. Quistis had gone off to find Kren and
congratulate him using her new vocabulary. Undoubtedly Kren would then drag
her off for a while to meet people or see things. They didn't expect to see
the youngest member of their party any time soon.

The four of them chatted until Kei's father showed up. Both Kei and
Enju's spines tightened as his pompous air stifled them. Xu was seemingly
immune to the self-righteousness that irked her two companions and greeted her
uncle kindly.

"This truly is the work of the Spirits, especially since your timing is
perfect," he commented.

"How do you mean?" Xu asked politely.

"The day after tomorrow more children will be challenging the rite of
passage. Your presence will do much to set the hearts of their parents at
ease; knowing that the Spirit of Protection is with us."

"Is that so..?" Xu purred.

Kei knew when her cousin was using her SeeD mask. Idiots! The whole lot
of them! How could they even *think* of sending more children out after they'd
just gotten five lost ones back? Kei's anger at her clansmen renewed for this
act of foolishness.

The head elder didn't so much as bat an eye as his colleague unknowingly
angered the people he was speaking with. Kei's father left their group to go
speak with some others. Kei was tempted to follow him and tear him a new ass
hole.

Coughing discreetly, the old man broke them from their disgruntled
thoughts. "It is good to have you three here for such an important event and
we're grateful for all you've done already. Please continue to do what you can
to protect our children." He gave them all a measured look then shuffled away.

Xu let her breath out slowly. "How in the hell can we protect them when
we're not allowed to follow them around outside?" During the trial, no one
except for farmers was let outside the walls unless it was an emergency. That
was done to prevent any possible interference with the rite. The children had
to survive on their own for three days without assistance.

"Better yet, who's going to protect them from me?" Kei growled.

Enju crossed his arms defiantly. "Let it go. They shouldn't ask us to
protect them and then not let us *do* it."

Kei rocked on the balls of her feet while Xu continued to fume. "You
know," Kei drawled slowly, "Quistis is the right age for going out. Why not
send her on the pretext that she wanted to challenge the rite?"

Xu gave her a sharp look.

Enju nodded his head slowly in agreement. "What's wrong with that?
She's nearly a SeeD now. She's more than capable of fending for herself for a
few days."

"Quistis doesn't know the terrain, what plants are safe to eat, the
monsters..!"

Kei gave Xu a sideways glance. "Are you doubting her ability to
accomplish something at fifteen that you did when you were thirteen?"

Flustered, Xu looked away from her cousin. She didn't doubt Quistis'
ability to handle the rite, but the Jelleyes! She swallowed down the lump in
her throat that formed whenever she thought of the monsters that had so nearly
claimed her life.

"Think of it as a pre-field exam," Enju added, acting as the voice of
reason.

Xu pinched her nose between her thumb and forefinger. "Why are you two
agreeing?"

Both Kei and Enju took offense at that observation.

"You agreed on beating the crap out of each other. And on trailing
Quistis and Kren around Balamb -- don't think for a moment that I didn't know
about that! Now you two agree on this. Why is it that whenever you two
actually agree, it always winds up being something that agonizes me?"

"Um... We love you, Xu?" Enju offered, giving her the most sincere smile
he could manage.

"Stop agreeing with me," Kei grumbled.

It wasn't until an hour later that one of them caught up to Quistis long
enough to speak with her. Kren had her all over the place and back again while
showing her around. They wanted to have her approval before they approached
the elders and offered her up as a candidate for the rite. She wasn't
enthusiastically jumping at the opportunity, but she was agreeable.

Xu approached the head elder about sending Quistis. She still had her
reservations, but it was the best plan if they wanted to keep the children
relatively safe.

"Your companion has not come of age?" The old man asked.

'Of course now he would be difficult!' Xu thought wryly. A child had to
have an elder's permission before they were permitted to go out.

"Quistis has no homeland to call her own. She was orphaned at a young
age and the place of her birth has been under siege since before she was born.
We've acted as her surrogate family and wish to see her tested." Well, that
was somewhat true...

"You know that we welcome all who would come to us," he nodded sagely.
"She will gather with the other children tomorrow night to prepare for the
rite."

"Thank you, elder," Xu bowed politely to him and made her retreat. It
was a good thing Kei and Enju held back. If either of them heard how much
bullshit was being shoveled they would have gagged. But Xu had to wonder if
the elder didn't suspect their true motives from the start.

*****

The next morning found Quistis being barraged by her three friends, not
that it was a bad thing. She needed a solid briefing about what she'd
volunteered for. Xu gave her a crash course in what plants were safe to eat
and which should be avoided.

Once she had a firm grasp of that, Kei piped up to tell her all about the
monsters of the region. Fortunately, from how Kei described it, there was only
one type Quistis was likely to meet unless she wandered kilometers away from
the compound (not something that was encouraged). Jelleyes dominated this part
of the Serengetti Plains. They relied heavily upon pure elemental magic (fire,
ice, and thunder) for their attacks when provoked.

If she wanted to do this right, she wouldn't kill any monsters; instead
avoiding them. They wouldn't allow her to bring her rante along, but she would
be provided with a knife (intended for preparing food) and could draw spells
from whatever monsters she encountered.

As Xu explained it, the Anshin saw Guardian Forces as Spirits who choose
to travel with a human companion. If Quistis had any accompanying her, she
wouldn't be forced to leave them behind. That came as a small relief. Should
things turn nasty, she could call upon Shiva, Quetzalcoatl, or Ifrit to battle
on her behalf.

The objective that she needed to focus on wasn't protecting herself, but
to keep an eye on her fellow 'children'. While she wasn't outright told to
prevent another kidnapping if someone showed up to steal them away, it was made
obliquely clear. All the children were to return this time around.

"Now that Xu and Kei have scared you, let me remind you to have fun,"
Enju said from his spot leaned up against Xu's bedroom door. They would have
had more space had they gathered at Kei's house, but they couldn't risk Kei's
father discovering their intentions. Xu's father was gone and her mother was
in her small workroom on the other side of the house. This was the most
privacy they were likely to find.

"Fun?" Quistis asked. This hardly seemed like the time for it.

"Yes, fun. Quite honestly, this should be cake for you. Live it up.
Explore a little. Study the monsters." He leaned over to give her a squeeze
on the shoulder. "We are completely confident in your abilities."

Xu and Kei were quick to add their assurances to his. "You shouldn't
blow this off, but I doubt you'll be challenged," Kei said while giving Enju a
pointed look.

He shrugged nonchalantly in response.

Truth be told, Quistis had been hoping to spend her time here interacting
with the other Anshin. Maybe attend a few classes with Kren if they'd allow
it. Instead she was being sent off on a 'mission' that meant the loss of three
days she could better used to study these fascinating people.

The fact that she was taking part in an important clan ritual wasn't lost
on her, but it didn't have nearly the significance that it should. If she'd be
raised in their tradition, she'd be excited and scared about the next few days.
To her, this was nothing more than a pre-test to the 'rite' she would face when
it was time to become a SeeD.

Kren came around in the afternoon to meet up with her. There were many
more things that he wanted to show her. Quistis was proud of herself for how
much of what he said she was managing to follow. It was odd marriage of
languages that they spoke, but it worked.

He was surprised when she mentioned that she was going out tomorrow. He
had assumed that she was an adult already because of how she presented herself.
The advice he offered was along the same lines as what Xu said. He cut their
tour short so that they would be back at Xu's house before dusk. That was when
things began.

Xu was sitting on the doorstep patiently waiting for them when they
returned. Kren wished Quistis well and quickly dismissed himself. She
frowned. He never seemed comfortable when Xu was around. She could understand
discomfort around Kei, but not Xu.

"What's on your mind?" Xu asked, noticing the puzzled concern that was
written on her face.

Quistis shook it off. "It seems like Kren's afraid of you..."

Xu stood up from the step and brushed off her long skirt. "He is."

"He is? Why?" She followed Xu into the house. Kei and Enju weren't
around and neither were her parents.

"Because..." her answer drifted off as she was at a loss for words.
Abruptly she handed Quistis a backpack that was prepared for her. "You'll
learn a lot tonight at the ceremony. Save your questions until afterwards."

The frown on Quistis' face only deepened. Never before had Xu so
decidedly put an end to her questioning. If Xu hedged around a topic she would
give a half answer that satisfied the basic question, but didn't delve into
specifics. The person who asked was expected to take the hint and stop
pursuing the subject.

Xu gave her shoulder a firm squeeze. "I'm not trying to put you off.
Tonight is special. You'll hear many stories of Anshin history and mythology
as part of the ceremony. It'd be wrong for me to spoil you before you had the
chance to experience it first hand."

"Kind of like ruining the end of a book, huh?" She agreed wryly. Just so
long as Xu was willing to answer her questions afterwards, she would be content
to wait a few more days.

Her friend nodded at the analogy. Xu escorted her to the hall they had
gathered in the previous night. An elder (Quistis assumed, judging by his
robes) stood guard at the entrance. When he challenged them, Xu answered and
presented Quistis. She tried to stand up a bit straighter and look confident.
After consulting a handwritten list, he nodded once and permitted Quistis to
enter but not Xu.

There were a dozen candidates milling around the large room. Each of
them had a backpack that matched her own either slung across their backs or
close at hand. Xu had gone through the contents of the bag with her this
morning. There was a cup, knife, twine, fire starter, compass -- the basic
survival items. There was also a day's worth of rations and a water bottle.
Their inclusion was a concession towards erring on the side of safety. They
were expected to scavenge for food and water, but if worse came to worst, they
could survive the three days with what they had and a bit of fasting.

One more person entered after Quistis. Apparently this was the last
person they were waiting for because an elder began calling for them to gather
around him at one end of the room.

A hand was placed on her shoulder as they drew near. Xu's father
motioned for them to take a seat on a pair of floor cushions on the outskirts
of the half circle the children formed. "I will translate the elder's words
for you," he explained in a hushed voice.

Every eye in the room was focused on the wrinkled old man who guided the
Anshin. He smiled fondly at those surrounding him before speaking with a slow,
measured tone. Xu's father began speaking shortly after he did. Obviously
he's played the role of translator before.

"Be welcome. What a joy it is to see your enthusiasm as you're gathered
here. This is an exciting event -- a celebration of your heritage and your
future. Tonight, we will discuss where you are from and what it means to be
Anshin before you challenge your future."

Quistis watched the old man intently, paying little attention to Xu's
father as he spoke softly to her. In a way, the elder reminded her of the
Headmaster. Both men became quite animated with passion when addressing those
around them.

The lights dimmed with only a few remaining to add a sense of ambiance.
The elder motioned for them to draw closer to him as he made himself
comfortable on his own cushion. Quistis didn't scoot too much closer; she
didn't want to distract from what she was witnessing.

After giving them all an appraising look, he shifted himself to be more
comfortable. "Now comes the part I'm sure you all have been waiting for...
Perhaps with a measure of dread from what your teacher tells me," he gestured
to Xu's father. The children shuffled some at what their instructor may have
told the elder about them.

'He's a teacher? How fitting that Xu followed in his footsteps,' Quistis
thought with bemusement. 'Even if she does teach a subject they don't agree
with.'

The elder told a story that couldn't be found in any history book. It
was a tale from 4000 years ago when the planet was formed. She'd read that the
Sorceresses claimed that the Great Hyne created mankind. The Great Hyne then
gave them the power of the Sorceress. Exactly why they were singled out was a
mystery to Quistis. The Anshin account didn't touch upon the Great Hyne or
Sorceresses to either confirm or deny it.

They did add quite a bit of background about *why* the world was created.
To them, this was a dream -- a dream that offered insights to their soul. In
the 'real world' they were resting from a great journey along the Path of Life.
The elder didn't explain why they were on this journey to begin with since such
profound things weren't of immediate concern. (In other words, he didn't know,
in Quistis' opinion). Quistis wondered if there were other worlds beyond the
Path and this dream. The prospect was a boggling one. She could only imagine
the amount of exploring that could be done if that was the case.

He allowed them the chance to ask questions once he was finished with the
history lesson. Any number of things came to mind, but her thoughts were still
on this afternoon.

"What role does Xu play within the clan?" It might have been rude of her
to ask such a blunt question, but she really wanted to know. Xu had been
acting strange ever since they got here. At first, she'd written it off
because Xu was home. The more Quistis interacted with the other Anshin, the
more she suspected a greater depth had yet to be uncovered.

"You ask about the Spirits? Yes, it is important that we discuss them,"
he scratched the back of his near-bald head. "There are Spirits that are
native to this world and those who are native to the Path of Life. The Spirits
represent a variety of things, be it an elemental force or the essence of an
emotion. They can guide us, protect us, and fight for us. An example of a
Guardian Spirit that lives on this plane is Alexander. He brings with him a
holy judgment that none can defy.

"We rarely see the Spirits of the Path of Life. They're around us, but
don't incarnate themselves unless there is a dire reason. For them to do so,
you can rest assured that something is threatening the very existence of this
place.

"To get back to your question, Xu is the incarnation of a Spirit from the
Path. The Spirit of Protection, to be exact. She's done much for us already
by returning our clansmen, but they aren't a compelling enough reason for her
to incarnate. No, something else is on the horizon..." He let that thought
trail off.

For once, Quistis was without a follow up question. They believed that
Xu, her former roommate and best friend, was a Guardian Force of sorts. She
could understand why Xu didn't want to discuss it with her. Quistis would
either think she's insane or ask to see her stone for summoning. But still, if
Xu was a Spirit and Spirits were as benevolent as he made them out to be, why
was Kren afraid?

The elder carefully considered his answer to the voiced question as the
other children's faces paled. Their expressions resembled those of her
classmates when she'd ask questions of the Shumi that they wouldn't dare.
Quistis had never considered herself to be an extremely bold person, but why
shouldn't the question be asked if you don't know the answer?

"As I said, the Spirits only come here if there is a pressing reason. As
Travelers, it is our obligation to help them in any way we can. If a Spirit
asks us for lodging, we give it to them. If they ask for assistance, we ask
how many people they need. If they asked our lives, it would be theirs. We
trust them to do whatever is necessary to protect this world. Even if it is a
dream, it serves a very important role in our existence."

Quistis was flabbergasted. They would put so much faith into a person
and give them such power over their lives? Who decided such things? It struck
her as a terrible position to be in -- obligated to carry out some greater
purpose for the folks back home.

"What do you think of Xu being a Spirit?" She whispered privately to Xu's
father.

"She will always be my little girl," he smiled fondly. "Xu set her own
course not long after this trial. As long as she's happy with what she's
doing, then I am as well."

The elder caught her attention again. "The Spirits aren't the only
guardians that you should be aware of. All of you should keep an eye out for
the Tonberries."

"Tonberry? What's that?" It wasn't a monster that was mentioned during
her briefing. As far as she knew, Jelleyes were the only thing she needed to
watch out for.

"They're little green lizards that wear a cowl and have a thick, forked
tail poking out the back. They often carry a lantern and a knife with them,"
another child explained. "It can be a good or bad omen if one approaches you.
Good in that you're somehow special. Bad in that you'll likely have to go on a
quest on its behalf."

"They're not monsters?" Quistis tried to picture a green lizard wearing a
cowl. Every image her mind came up with was increasingly absurd.

"Nope! They're historians. Lore keepers. Story tellers. And much
wiser than us humans," the girl continued.

"Huh..." They sounded like librarians to Quistis. The idea of a short
lizard trying to place a book on a high shelf was definitely ridiculous and
quickly discarded. Where did her mind come up with this stuff?

The elder cleared his throat to bring their attention back to him. "The
Tonberries know of this trial. We know that in the past they've taken this
opportunity to seek out those humans they wish to speak with. When you're out
in the wilderness, don't be afraid if you should have a vision. This is meant
to be a profound experience; a turning point in your lives."

The people seated around her nodded sagely. Quistis was less than
impressed. So far this sounded like a camping trip with a side of theology. A
school related trip would have pointed out rock formations or plants to watch
out for. Instead, they were being warned about Spirits and Tonberries.
Quistis tried to keep an open mind about things, but this was a bit much
without some evidence to support it.

"We are all children in a way. What distinguishes adults from children
are our responsibilities and how we learn our lessons. During the upcoming
years you will still have school to attend, but many of the lessons you will be
taught won't be in the classroom. The challenges of living day-to-day life
offer countless opportunities for learning. Some of you may already know what
you would like to do with your life; others are still exploring. The time
between now and your second rite is meant for that journey. You will spend
time assisting your clansmen in a variety of tasks. I hope that you all will
absorb what they have to teach you."

The old man met each of their eyes, including Quistis'. She didn't know
what he hoped to find there. Her path was already chosen and she'd let nothing
throw her off course. She would be a SeeD.

They settled down to sleep not long afterwards. The elders said a prayer
over them and then wished them a good night. When the morning came, they would
be well rested and ready for the challenges ahead.

*****

The ground crunched under Quistis' shoes as she left the safety of the
Anshin compound. The sun was just beginning its ascent from the east. She
couldn't see any monsters in the immediate area, but one would expect them to
keep away from a well-established human habitat. Adjusting the weight of her
pack, she set out.

There were some restrictions on where they could and could not go. They
couldn't be within a kilometer of the compound or its farmland. They were also
warned against wandering into the lone forest that stood off in the distance or
going to the Centra crater. There was plenty of room for them to spread out as
they were supposed to. Quistis took note of which ways the others were headed.
Hopefully none would stray *too* far away because if they did, her rounds for
checking on them all that more difficult.

Seemingly at random she chose a direction to wander off in. It was odd,
the 'feel' she got now that she wasn't within the compound. She didn't think
that those protective walls had such a psychological effect on her. She didn't
feel frightened to be out in the open, but the sense of inner peace that she
had was no longer with her.

She spotted a pair of Jelleyes in the distance. As stealthily as
possible she approached their position. This would be her first chance to
study one in the flesh. Maybe she could learn a few tricks from them that she
could use in her Limit.

The monsters moved down into a ravine. Quistis approached the edge
before lowering herself down to the ground. Silently she inched herself to the
ledge to observe the monsters. Their coloring was pretty, but that didn't make
up for the fact that they were gruesome looking. In the center of their
floating bodies was a row of three eyes along their torso. They had great fans
of flesh extending below the bottom eye and around the upper two and a pair of
tentacles swayed behind them. Such a mutated creature repulsed her natural
sense of aesthetics.

Quistis studied them intently while never forgetting that she was in a
dangerous region. Another monster could stumble across her while she was down
and make life difficult if she wasn't on her guard.

Eventually they moved along and Quistis withdrew from her perch. There
wasn't much she could learn from them. According to Kei, the most useful thing
they had to offer was the magic that could be drawn from them. Perhaps if she
found herself toeing off against one she'd draw as much as possible before
summoning one of her GFs to finish it.

Quistis continued her exploring, taking note of the terrain around her.
She encountered a stream that would be a good source of fresh water. A
half-kilometer away from that she found some of the tubers Xu suggested.
Quistis pulled out her knife and used it to dig up the root and then packed
both of them away for when she decided to settle down to eat. It wouldn't be a
bad idea to return to this area as a home base. There was a small tree back by
the stream that she could camp under.

Satisfied with her plan, she continued to check up on the other children.
Quistis didn't need to go up and see if they were okay. If she could see them
from the distance and establish that they were still moving, then everything
was fine.

She'd tracked down eight of them by the time the sun was prepared to set
in the west. That was her cue to get back to the stream and settle down for
the evening. Daylight held out long enough for her to get comfortably settled.
She built a small fire and placed her tuber to cook in the hot coals.

The sunset blazed with more intensity than the fire she sat by. It was a
wondrous event to watch. All too often the day slipped by without her taking
notice of such displays of nature.

When she began to grow tired, she cleared a flat part of ground of any
rocks or weeds that might poke her. She then washed her face in the stream and
got her pack propped up to act as a headrest. A lightweight sleeping bag had
been attached to the bottom of the pack. She rolled it out across the clearing
she had made.

Some of the children took a pop tent with them, but Quistis elected to
leave it behind because she wanted to sleep under the stars. Some might argue
that being out in the open would make her a more likely victim of the monsters,
but if the monster was that intent on attacking she doubted that the thin nylon
of a tent would dissuade them.

The night was clear and the moon a bright one. Quistis studied the stars
above as her mind lazily identified constellations. She used to watch the
stars when she was younger and still lived at Matron's orphanage. She would
have never thought that she would have the opportunity to watch the stars of a
Centra night after she left, but here she was.

Matron had been interested in the stars as well. She told them stories
about the powers the stars held and the dangers of the moon. Quistis shivered
even though the night's air wasn't chilly. The moon was a frightening thing.
It was the source of many of the monsters that roamed this planet. Those
monsters were directly responsible for the destruction of the land she
currently rested on. Before the Lunar Cry all of Centra was fertile and
hospitable, not just a few regions like the Cape of Good Hope.

Quistis had to give the Anshin credit for doing as well as they have.
This land wasn't easy to coax life from. She still wondered about their
success. There had to be some secret behind the thriving crops she saw when
they arrived. Such a defiance of nature didn't come without a price.

Sleep came to Quistis like a thief, quietly stealing away her
consciousness.

She woke up in her dorm room in Balamb Garden. What on earth was she
doing here? She swung her legs over the side of her bed to find that she was
already dressed for the day, shoes and all. Since she was obviously ready to
go out, she opened up the door left.

The first thing she noticed was how quiet the dorms were. They were
never this quiet except at the dead of night. She went to Enju's room and
knocked on the door. He didn't answer. Carefully she pushed the door open.
On the desk his math textbook was opened and a half glass of juice sat besides
it. Had she just missed him?

Quistis left his room to explore the rest of the Garden. The Cafeteria
had chairs pulled out as though people had been sitting there and had just
vanished. That thought was furthered by the fact that trays of still hot food
were on the tables half-eaten.

She wandered around the Garden, unable to find another person. It was
like they were all playing a grand joke on her and leaving right before she
arrived. The classrooms had notepads, bags and books all around the desks.
The Quad had some scattered bags, books and sports equipment. This wasn't
funny!

Walking down a hallway a cool wind blew through. She placed a hand on
the back of her neck, feeling the fine hairs prick up in protest. This wasn't
natural. There shouldn't be any sort of breeze produced by the climate control
systems. The hairs on her neck remained erect when she heard the faint echoes
of voices. When the breeze receded, the voices did too. And when it returned,
there was a whisper carried along in its wake.

Quistis couldn't quite make out what was being said. It was a jumble of
many conversations merged together. She could hear whispers, fragmented words,
and laughter. It was as if the cadets were still there even though all
physical evidence pointed to the contrary.

Abruptly the lights went out except for a row of safety lights along the
corridor she was in. They flared to life then raced down the hall in a pattern
that invited one to follow in that direction. Hesitantly Quistis followed the
lights. As she walked it became clear that only the chosen corridor was lit.
Looking down intersecting hallways proved them to be dark and empty. The
voices of the cadets started to get louder, rowdier.

Soon she found herself standing in front of the doors to the training
facilities. As with the other rooms, the training room was full of scattered
equipment lying around without any owners. If Xu ever saw the room in this
condition, she'd be fit to be tied. Quistis reluctantly stared at the first
gate that led into the Training Center. With resolve she pushed herself onward
through the first security gate and onto the second.

Her mouth fell agape at what she discovered beyond the second gate. The
ground was dried up, mud flats dull and broken apart like armour plates long
left to disuse. A dying and fragile cobblestone world, where it seemed a
single footstep could not only crush the ground, but all of a dreamer's hopes.

A black sun reigned high overhead, darkness spread across the heavens.
Veins of sunlight and fire streaked between the clouds, which moved like time
had been accelerated and she had been left as she was.

Looking down at herself, she discovered that she was no longer wearing
her cadet uniform. She'd regressed to the size of a small child. She was
wearing a sundress and walking around without shoes or socks. How large the
world was when one was child-sized again!

Quistis knelt down, watching intently as she cracked apart the dry mud
between the toes her bare feet.

Suddenly the valley came alive with a low rumble. The rumble grew to
cause the hardened mud to quiver. Fragments of rock rattled around at Quistis'
feet. Her eyes widened and she found herself taking a step back as she saw a
series of shimmering lights slowly, relentlessly approach. The distant rumble
grew into a roar.

The roar of approaching floodwaters. A scream of terror caught in her
throat. There was no chance of escaping the onslaught of water, even if she
tried to run. If this was going to be the end for her, then she would meet it
on her feet and looking it straight in the eyes.

Quistis held her ground.

The tides smashed into her body.

She was giddy from the ecstasy of adrenaline. Salt touched her lips,
coarse and unrefined. Ocean water swept through the mud flats, drenching and
submerging everything in a flood of the sea.

Quistis' feet were pushed back by the crashing waves, her body stumbling
through the pounding surf like a drunken man reeling from one taste too many of
scotch. And she still dared to defy the flood.

A wave smashed into her chest and she pinwheeled backwards. Her feet
caught the thick paste that had once been dried mud, and found a hold. She rose
up; water droplets of ocean falling down her face, bangs of hair clung to her
forehead, eyes wide in possession and obsession.

"Is that the best you can do?!" she shouted, raising her arms to the
skies. "I won't give up that easily!"

Another surge, furious and drowning, smashed into her body and smothered
her in the warmth of the ocean's wet heartbeat. She felt weightless, dizzy,
every part of her body burning despite the waters.

She pushed against the tides, fighting them and inevitably falling to
their force. Collapsed in a heap of soaked clothes and water onto the floor. A
loud splash was Quistis' escort, droplets of salt water lingering on her lips
as they splashed against her surroundings. A shaking hand was raised in the
air, her body suddenly chilled. Quistis could feel the lunatic smile on her
face as she stared at her palm, at the water flowing down her skin and dripping
onto the ground.

"What is happening to me?" she gasped between heavy breaths. Was she
going insane? Was this just a horrifyingly graphic nightmare, or was this
really happening? Maybe it was the food or lack thereof?

Off in the distance, inexplicably so, a woman sat on a rock outcropping
and watched her. The woman did nothing to hide her nudity. The harp that
rested on her knee did precious little to block a person's wandering eyes.

Quistis straightened herself out, once again full grown and not the size
of a child. She was dressed in her cadet uniform. The woman with the harp
stroked her fingers across its strings and Quistis woke up with a start.

Her mind futilely tried to cling to the wisps of her dream, but it was
gone completely by the time she collected her wits about her. With a childish
sense of fear she scooted over to the banked fire and coaxed it back to life.
The dream left her feeling oddly satisfied. Almost as if she had passed some
sort of test in which the results were anything but certain.

It was early enough in the evening that it was in her best interests to
attempt to sleep again. When she did, she slept solidly for the rest of the
night.

A bird chirping in the tree she slept by greeted her along with the
rising sun. If there was a bird nearby, then it was a safe bet that the
monsters weren't. Even still, she was careful to not move until she was
reasonably sure of the safety of her immediate surroundings.

Quistis stretched out before getting ready for the day. As she was
re-packing her things she found something that wasn't part of the standard
issue pack in one of the side pockets: a crossword puzzle book and an ink pen.
The discovery brought a smile to Quistis' face. Obviously Kei didn't want
Quistis to have nothing to do if she should become bored while out here.

The first order for the day would be to find the four children that she
wasn't able to locate yesterday. Once they were accounted for she would go
back and check up on the ones she had caught up with once already.

Quistis tried to create as little of a disturbance as possible as she
moved through the dry brush that scraped against the leggings she wore. She
wished that she'd had the foresight to bring heavier boots with her, preferably
ones that went up to the mid-calf. There was no telling what kind of critter
she might kick up by accident while walking around in their habitat. If a
snake came after her, that's where it was likely to strike.

By the time the sun was blazing high above she had located most of the
other children. None of them were in any sort of peril that she could see.
Quistis considered what to do with herself for the rest of the day. She could
keep moving from person to person to spy on them, but that wasn't very
interesting. Nor were the monsters. Fortunately, she'd spotted precious few
and had skillfully skirted around them. Maybe after the trial was over she
could come back out and challenge the Jelleyes to a few rounds, but this wasn't
the time for battling.

She made her way back to her little clearing and settled in to kill some
time. The sounds of the stream flowing close by reminded her of Balamb's many
fountains. It made her heart ache with longing to return to the place she
called home.

Her time away from everyone else gave her plenty of opportunity to think
things through. She was close to graduation. The only thing holding her back
was the final exams. The exams... Those made her nervous. She kept thinking
back to when Xu took her exams. She was so calm and confident then. Of
course, Xu was a self-confident sort of person. She rarely gave in to the sort
of doubts that seemed to haunt Quistis when she could least afford it.

Like when she was trying to learn her Limit. What a trial that had been!
And the worst part of it all was the anguish Quistis put herself through.
There wasn't any reason for her to suffer as she did. But the doubts were like
demons that wouldn't let her live in peace. She wondered if the day would ever
come when she wouldn't be held back by her own shortcomings.

Quistis made another round of the children before calling it a day. All
was well with them, and all was well with her plain dinner and getting a good
night's rest. She could make her way back tomorrow. This trial seemed almost
too easy for her liking, but she shouldn't invite trouble.

Settling down for bed she once again watched the stars above and wondered
what it would be like to touch them. The model that the Anshin created with
the Path of Life lent itself well to the idea of there being other worlds. 'If
one were to walk the Path, could they detour off it to visit one of the worlds
up there?' she wondered. What an adventure that would be!

Her mind fancied that thought as sleep overcame her.

There was a noise. Quistis slitted her eyes open, her every sense piqued
by the fear that a monster was nearby. What she saw was astonishing. A small,
chubby lizard that was the better part of a half-meter tall leaned over her
face. Its bright yellow, pupil-less eyes were focused on her. The creature --
'A Tonberry?' her mind jumped to conclusions -- extended a fingerless forearm
and began to pat her softly on the forehead. It gently brushed her bangs back
and continued to study her. Once it was satisfied with what it saw, it picked
up a nearby lantern that was on the ground and waddled away.

Quistis woke with a start and sat up, only to discover that she'd been
sleeping leaned against the foot of the largest creature she'd seen in her
life. A giant -- countless meters tall giant -- Tonberry made a gurgling noise
as she scrambled away from it screaming. The king of the Tonberries, for
that's what she would have called it considering the crown that floated above
its head, angled down to regard her. Her eyes grew to the size of saucers and
she let out another blood curling scream.

Quistis woke with a start and sat up. Shaking hands raked her fingers
through her roguish hair. What sort of nightmare was that? She stood up,
having decided that walking around for a bit would help to burn the adrenaline
that was coursing through her veins. The moon was as bright overhead as it was
the night before. Her mouth went dry as she watched something approach her
from the distance.

As the creature drew closer Quistis was able to make out more details.
It was definitely a human. He was wearing a pair of jeans and a white tee
shirt. On his head sat a dark fedora. Quistis' heart leapt into her throat as
she recognized the man as Sean. He didn't see her judging by how he was
acting. He also didn't see the fearsome monster that was coming up behind him.
Quistis yelled for him to watch out, panic took over for rationalizing what she
was witnessing.

Sean's head snapped around and she knew that he saw her. In agonizing
slow motion his legs picked up and he started running towards her, the monster
in hot pursuit. Just as suddenly as the monster appeared, Sean vanished. The
monster, however, did not. Quistis backpedaled to escape the phantom.

Another man dressed in dark robes that had numerous buckles appeared
between them with a large scythe at the ready. The monster bore down on him.
With admirable skill the man was able to keep the monster at bay, but not beat
it back. Quistis watched them battle with muted awe. It was as though she was
watching a movie -- this wasn't part of her reality.

But a whisper in her mind insisted that it was...

She cowered back, knowing that the man wouldn't be able to keep the
monster contained indefinitely. He shoved it back with a grunt and quickly
made a motion. Due to the speed with which he'd done it, Quistis at first
thought he had cast a quick spell, but he'd actually summoned a Guardian Force.
The Guardian he called caused her already weakened knees to give out on her and
drop her to the ground.

Xu materialized between the man and the monster. She was wearing
something like the elaborate style of dress they wore when they first arrived.
Xu was always a graceful fighter, but she was exceptionally so this time. Her
body arched and spun in an effortless dance as she destroyed the monster.
Quistis found herself mesmerized by how pretty she was like this. Once Xu was
finished, she turned around and saluted the man in the manner Quistis was so
used to seeing from her friend -- her sai crossed and her head bowed. Then she
disappeared.

The man turned around and saw her seated in the dirt. He reached a hand
out to help her up. Quistis accepted his help and then noticed how very much
he looked like an older, wiser, version of Enju.

"You don't belong here yet," he murmured softly, running his hand gently
down her cheek. He put his hand over her eyes, closing them as he did
so. When she opened them again she found herself standing on a high hill
overlooking Balamb Bay. Xu was there beside her. She was wearing one of her
favorite leisurely dresses and looked nothing like the destructive force
Quistis had so recently witnessed.

"What do you think of your new students?" Xu pointed down the hill, where
three people were lounging on the grass. One of them was that ruffian Seifer.
With him were two other students she'd seen around but didn't know personally.
Fujin and Raijin if she recalled their names correctly.

Xu turned her attention to the sky above and put her arm up to shade her
eyes from the sun. The older woman glanced back at Quistis and smiled, pleased
with the state of things. Xu then wished her well before heading down the side
of the hill opposite of where the three cadets were lounging. A moment later
she vanished.

Quistis woke up with a start and sat up. This time... This time she was
sure that she was awake. Quickly she scrambled over to the dying fire and
built it back up again. There was no way she'd let herself go back to sleep
tonight, not if these were the types of dreams that would be waiting for her.

Desperately she tried to cling to the images, but they slipped away like
sand through a person's fingers. Maybe, maybe it was lack of food or
exhaustion that was causing her to have these dreams. She hoped that they
would cease once she returned to the Anshin compound. If they didn't stop
after she returned to Balamb, she would consult Doctor Kadowaki.

*****

It was a mellow night in the home shared by Xu's parents. As it was
every night for as long as she could remember, Xu reflected. Her parents
settled down in the living room after dinner and did quiet tasks until it was
time for bed. During the evening was when Xu's mother liked to do her
needlework. While she did that, Xu's father would sit at a small desk and
prepare for school the next day (grading papers, prepping lessons, and
whatnot). When Xu was a child she would make herself comfortable on the floor
and play. Once she was older, her playtime turned into homework.

As she stood in the doorway of the living room she fought off the urge to
return to her spot on the floor and sit. She was an adult. She should act
like one by sitting on the furniture. Without apparent notice she sat next to
her mother on the couch.

And sat.

"Um..."

Her mother glanced up from her work to regard her daughter with a
questioning look.

Xu flushed. There was something she wanted to say, but now that she had
both of her parents cornered it was difficult to get the words out. "I'm
sorry."

"For what?" Her mother asked gently, setting aside her current project.

Xu brushed her hair back so that her mother could see her ear. "For
this. For not being here."

Her father turned away from the papers he was grading. "Have you done
something wrong?"

Xu paused to think about his question before answering. "I don't think
so, but I still feel as though I owe you an apology. I left you behind to
follow my own path."

"As you ought," he said firmly. "More than anything we want you to be
happy. What makes you happy couldn't be found here, we understand. The
stories you tell us about the places you've been and the people you've met
reassure us that you made the right choice in leaving."

Xu closed her eyes and took a deep breath while she absorbed the wisdom
of his words.

"If it wasn't for your wandering you wouldn't have met your young friend
Kwis, nor would you have met Sean," her mother pointed out. "His leaving may
bring sorrow, but I doubt you regret knowing him while he was on this plane."

"I don't regret it," Xu agreed without hesitation. "But it's well within
your rights to call me back here to marry. Aren't you disappointed that I
haven't started a family?"

Her father shook his head slowly. "Would having a family right now make
you happy? Your life isn't about what we want. It's about what *you* want.
I've never asked you to return for that reason; because I know that you would
come."

Xu felt her cheeks become hot. What he said was true. If she was called
back, she would come. It would disappoint her greatly if some compromise
couldn't be reached between her obligations to her clan and husband, and her
life as a SeeD. She didn't want to think about the consequences if she was
forced to choose between her commitments. She bowed her head slightly. Her
father was sparing her a great deal of anguish by not enforcing tradition.

"You're a good child," Xu's mother patted her hand, "but please don't
worry about us."

She ran her hand through Xu's hair, smiling fondly at her, then paused to
study her profile. "Between your tall friend and the traditions of out there
you'll keep me challenged for the next few days."

"Mother..." Xu leaned over and embraced her mother in a fierce hug. She
was lucky to have such understanding parents, especially when rigid tradition
could easily stand between them. Kei's difficulties with her father were a
prime example of how things could go wrong. She pitied her cousin because Kei
didn't have the open dialogue with her parents that Xu enjoyed. Yes, Xu was
very fortunate for what she had.

"Why don't you go find your friends? I'm sure they would be more
exciting than a pair of old folks," her father smiled slightly at the
self-depreciation.

Xu nodded. That was her father's way of getting her out of the house
when he wanted to speak with her mother without Xu around. She squeezed her
mother once more before standing up and going over to give her father a peck on
the cheek. Not another word was said until she closed the front door behind
herself.

"She's grown into a lovely woman," her mother commented thoughtfully.
She brought her needlework back onto her lap before continuing. "So your
answer to her suitors is final?"

He snorted. "They're fools to seek out the hand of a woman they hardly
know. Enough chains hold her back without binding her with more. And I
worry..."

"She'll be fine. I have faith." She stabbed the needle through the
cloth and bobbed it back up again with practiced ease.

"It's the prerogative of a father to worry."

His wife smiled without turning her attention away from her work. "And
you fill the role nicely."

He didn't respond since a comment wasn't necessary. There was no denying
his protective nature of his very independent daughter. Letting his concern go
he returned to the papers that needed to be graded for tomorrow's class.



With only the moon above lighting the way Kei meandered towards the old
well. Enju had disappeared shortly after dinner and she had a feeling that she
would find him there. Her hunch proved correct when she spotted a dark
silhouette sitting on the edge of the well looking at the sky above. She said
nothing as she settled herself in next to him.

"I can see why you don't like it here," he commented finally. "My nerves
feel like they're being dragged across Talasu's practice mats. I can't put my
finger on it, but that's how I feel."

"It makes sense. The elders insist that the layout of the compound must
in harmony with the flow of the land. Father says that it brings peace and
makes us stronger spiritually," she shrugged to indicate how much faith she put
into that logic.

"Maybe it does. This place makes my skin crawl."

"There's no reason a remorseless killer should feel comfortable when
surrounded by extreme pacifists," Kei reasoned.

Enju didn't answer. Instead he looked down at the metal plates of the
kote he wore. The moon was bright enough that it caused the armor to reflect
in the moonlight. He undid the straps and pulled off the kote, leaving his
skin (and identity) exposed for anyone to see. Kei didn't comment when he set
the kote on the ground near his feet.

It felt good to strip them off, but not so much physically as
psychologically. He was far enough off the beaten path that he could allow
himself a night of relaxed paranoia. His skin shimmered under the moonlight,
creating an effect that could almost be called pretty.

Another shadow separated itself from its surroundings and the gravel
crunched beneath its feet as it drew near. "I saw you glowing," Xu motioned to
Enju.

He nodded silently. Xu sat down on the well's edge next to Kei.

Enju obviously wasn't in the mood to talk, so Kei turned her attention to
her cousin. "How'd it go with your parents?"

"What do you mean?" Xu asked cautiously.

"You were going to have some sort of deep conversation with them, weren't
you?"

Xu shuffled uncomfortably before settling down again. "Yes, we spoke. I
wanted to apologize to them, but Father wouldn't hear it and Mother was her
usual accepting self."

"What did you have to apologize for?" Enju asked without showing much
genuine interest in their conversation. His voice was distant and hollow.

"For not living up to their expectations. I doubt very much that when I
was born they were expecting a daughter who broke clan precepts at every turn.
As far as Anshin society goes, I haven't treated them very well. I haven't
fulfilled my role as a daughter." Xu took a deep breath of the crisp night air
and let it out slowly. She didn't want to wrong the ones she loved. Despite
their assurances, she felt guilty for putting her own desires first.

Kei's response was to quickly stomp out the lingering doubts in Xu's
mind. The fact was, her parents *did* understand and they *did* approve of
what Xu was doing with her life. If that wasn't an invitation to keep going as
she had been, Kei didn't know what one was.

When Kei turned to Enju for his help in reassuring Xu, she was taken
aback by what he said.

"Stop being such a coward," he said softly. Xu took hold of Kei's arm to
keep her from slamming her fist into Enju. Without regard to the fury sitting
next to him, Enju angled himself to address Xu. "You're weak for running away
from the love your parents offer. 'They'll be disappointed with you'?" He
laughed at the fear. "What a lame excuse. There isn't a parent in their right
mind that wouldn't be proud of your accomplishments. So stop masquerading your
lack of self-esteem. Some of us orphans have a real problem with this."

Xu let go of her grip on Kei. "I- I'm sorry," she whispered. It was
foolish of her to doubt the support of her parents -- that was an absolute.
She'd never considered how orphans like Enju and Quistis might have felt.

"Don't be sorry, be the leader we look up to," Enju smirked. He leaned
behind Kei to give her a squeeze on the shoulder. Despite being obscured by
the darkness, Enju could see the grateful look she gave him.

"Speaking of leading the way," Kei drawled once Enju returned to his
original position, "Father asked for you to meet with the elders for your
interview after breakfast tomorrow. They'll send a page for Xu and me when
they're ready for us."

That got him smirking, though it seemed only half-hearted. Kei could see
that the Anshin camp was really getting to him. "Interview? You make it sound
like I'm applying for a job as a Spirit," Enju mocked lightly.

"In a way, you are," Xu commented thoughtfully. "They're going to ask
you *a lot* of questions."

Kei bobbed her in agreement. "And whatever you do, don't fall asleep."

"Okay..." Most people didn't fall asleep in the middle of a conversation
to begin with since it was considered rude in most parts of the world.

Kei grunted. "They have a habit of dragging you off and tattooing you
while you sleep."

"Ah... Point taken."

"I wasn't asleep," Xu chimed in.

"You were a willing victim," Kei countered. "I'm warning you, Enju, keep
your eyes on them."

At the very least, Enju thought to himself, if they did try something
like that they'd quickly find that all the prime spots to tattoo his body were
already taken.

Across the way from them, a curtain parted in the window of the house of
the old woman who never liked Kei. The woman peered at them accusingly before
the curtain shut again. A moment later the door opened and she stood on the
front step with a robe tightly pulled around her.

"Shouldn't you kids be in bed? You're keeping me awake with all your
chatter!" She complained bitterly.

Kei leaned over and picked up a small rock from the ground before
chucking it in her general direction. It hit the side of her house with a
sharp crack. "Shut up you old bag!" Kei yelled back. "Stop eavesdropping on
our conversation!"

"Kei, be nice," Xu hissed in a whisper.

"Oh! I'll speak with the elders in the morning. Just you wait, you
ill-mannered child!" She stomped her slippered foot on the step with
indignation.

"When are you going to wither up and die?!" Kei chucked another rock at
her, this one hit a lot closer to the door. The woman shook her fist at them
before going inside and slamming the door behind her.

Xu sighed heavily. "That's not how you be nice."

"You just way have a magical way with people, don't you?" Enju said
dryly. He didn't understand a word of their argument, but the thrown rocks and
body language spoke volumes.

"She's given me grief since I was a child." Kei pushed herself up to her
feet. "We've got a big day tomorrow. We should probably get some sleep."

"Heh," Enju stood up. "Feeling guilty after nearly pegging the old
lady?"

Kei offered her hand to Xu and pulled her to her feet. "Hardly. I'll
return in the morning to create more havoc."

It was a promise Kei fulfilled after breakfast where she could be found
in the courtyard with Mikel. Not far away Xu was helping a pair of Kei's
younger siblings fly a kite. The old woman glared at them through her
curtained windows, but didn't repeat the mistake of leaving her house while Kei
was around.

At about the same time Enju was in a room thick with the smell of
incense. He hadn't been there for more than an hour and his legs were already
becoming stiff from sitting uncomfortably on the floor. The five elders seated
across from him asked countless questions ranging from the insignificant to the
profound. To what end, he wasn't certain yet, but he'd find out soon enough.

As abruptly as the questioning began, it stopped when they called a
recess. An acolyte brought him something to eat after the elders retreated
from the room. Enju stretched out and began to pace the length of the room to
renew the circulation in his legs. A few choice kicks that could be made in
this enclosed location also helped drive away the sluggishness of his reflexes.

After a short time that seemed to take forever the elders returned to
their original spots. The door behind Enju opened and Kei and Xu came into the
room. Both women were dressed in the clothing of their upbringing. Xu bowed
politely towards the five aged men before sitting on a cushion to Enju's left.
Kei didn't bother with pleasantries and plopped down to his right.

"You're not wearing your kote?" Xu whispered to him while everyone was
getting settled.

He shrugged. "They asked me to remove them when I entered. I assumed
you wanted me to co-operate with them." He gave her an impish grin.

The head elder, who was seated in the center, bowed to all three of them
before speaking in standard. "It is an honor to be in the service of the
Spirits. We have done all we can to help advise and guide you on this plane."

He came forward and knelt down before Xu. He took her hands up into his
own and kissed the backs of them softly before speaking to her. "You have
already done much for our clan to protect its members, but you have a greater
calling than this. You must help protect the world from an evil that none of
us can see or hear. I'm sorry that I can't tell you more than that. Know that
even though you walk blindly at times, your feet will remain true to the path
of your destiny."

He moved passed Enju to kneel before Kei. He did not take up her hands,
but he did bow low to her before speaking. "By the very nature of its being
the world is a chaotic element. You seek to bring stability to the world
around you and to assure that justice will always prevail. The tasks before
you are daunting ones -- especially in the upcoming years -- but you have the
strength of spirit to accomplish your ends. Please be strong, even when you
are weak."

Finally he positioned himself before Enju. He made no gesture of
greeting or respect as he had with the other two. "I have little advice to
give to the Spirit of Silence except to say that your task is done. I would
urge you strongly to move along before the ill fortune that lingers in your
shadow haunts those whom you care for and love."

Alarmed expressions were mirrored on Xu and Kei's face. This was the
last thing they had expected the elder to say to Enju. The only indicator of
Enju's thoughts was the clinching and unclenching of his fist.

"I thought you treated all your Spirits like they were revered beings,"
he said in a dangerously low voice. His eyes narrowed as he tilted his head to
stare at the elder. "What makes me the exception?"

The old man rubbed his chin thoughtfully before answering. "You are the
Spirit of Silence. As such, you represent the calm before the storm. You
assure that the stage is set on the dawn of battle. That is the meaning of
your existence. You've completed your task on this plane. The pieces are in
place. If you were to return to the Path tonight, you can do so assured that
you've accomplished what was needed of you."

"And what the fuck does that mean?!" Kei demanded, slamming the palm of
her hand on the floor. "Are you saying that Enju could die and it wouldn't
matter?" For as much as she and Enju disliked each other, the elder's
statement was insensitive and crass. She'd call them on it regardless of who
they insulted.

"It wouldn't matter now since the Spirit has completed his mission on
this plane," the elder agreed without hesitation. "If Silence allowed himself
to dream, then something wasn't prepared for the upcoming battle. Now, the
stage is set and the pieces are positioned as they ought to be.

"I thank you for all your efforts, Spirit, but I urge you to leave Balamb
Garden. Death has always followed in your wake. It is the nature of your
being. Your hard work may become undone if you don't."

Enju lowered his head. His chest visibly rose and fell with the deep
breaths he was taking. Xu reached over to put her hand on his, but he slapped
her palm away without even glancing in her direction. Slowly he got to his
feet, and Xu caught a glimpse of the look in his eyes. She held her breath in
realizing that the glimmer of Death's Angel was creeping back in.

"What makes you so high and mighty that you can dictate my future?" he
growled at the elder. His voice might have been tempered, sounding rational,
but Xu could hear in his tone that his resistance to kill was slipping. "On
what authority do tell me that I should welcome death, now that I've found
reason to live?"

He stepped closer, so that he was dangerously close to the elder. "Where
I come from it's not wise to insult a man who can make the sky rain blood. What
fucking thing told you this?"

"Your threats mean nothing to me," the elder said, easily meeting Enju's
frightening gaze. "What must be, must happen. That is the way of the Spirit of
Silence."

That answer didn't appease Enju in the slightest. His lips curled back,
his anger barely contained. Xu could suddenly feel Diablos rising to the
occasion. In the back of her mind she felt Carbuncle wake with a start and give
a worried bark. No doubt Alexander was reacting to the fact that the room felt
saturated with Diablos' dark presence.

Xu wondered if he was holding back because she and Kei were in the room.
Did that mean the elders knew this might happen, and used them as buffers to
keep Enju from exploding? Damn them for using her, for using all of them like
this!

Enju slowly got to his feet and closed the distance between himself and
the elder. Somehow the elder didn't show any signs of fear. Was he that
confident that Enju wouldn't kill him, or was he that naive about the ways of
an assassin?

"Balamb is my home," Enju whispered into the elder's ear, though his
voice was loud enough to be heard be everyone else. His words came out in a
borderline snarl. "I'm not going to abandon my family because some old geezers
say I should. Anyone who wishes to challenge that is welcome to try. Yourself
included."

Enju let out a final growl and moved towards the door. When the acolyte
tried to prevent him from leaving, Enju's hand wrapped around his throat. The
boy made frightened choking noises as Enju hoisted him off the ground by the
neck.

Enju's eyes were wide, and his body was shaking as he held the boy there
in the air. He looked as if some shred of humanity was fighting every other
instinct in him to snap the boy's neck. A part of him could kill this boy and
never feel sorry; slaughter all the villagers here before the first drop of
Anshin blood hit the ground, and never look back.

But then he saw Quistis out there taking her test. She would come back
and see the demon of death that he knew he could be. Quistis would be lost to
him forever if he did that. The near maniacal expression on his face faded
after a few tense moments, replaced by something less sadistic but perhaps even
darker.

With an enraged shout, Enju released the boy's neck--but before the
acolyte collapsed onto the ground, Enju grabbed hold of the boy's tunic and
flung him across the room. The boy tumbled onto the floor in a stunned and
frightened heap.

His gaze swept across the ranks of gathered elders, and his eyes narrowed
all the more. "Here's what I think of your fortune-telling."

Without saying another word he gave Diablos some room to move, letting
the GF's power smash open the door, breaking it off its hinges. Enju stood
calmly, staring at his audience as the door behind him exploded outward,
crashing onto the gravel path.

Nothing more was said.

Enju turned away and stalked out of the room, his hands now clenching and
relaxing, just waiting for the chance to hold any sort of weapon. Diablos'
tangible presence lingered a few moments longer, then departed also.

Xu stood up to go after him, but Kei caught her wrist and held her back.
"Let him be."

"Kei..!" Xu motioned towards the door. Enju was hardly in a state to be
left alone.

"He has death in his eyes," Kei hissed.

"That's why I have to follow him. To protect the clan from him and him
from himself!" Xu wrenched her wrist free and set off after Enju through the
broken doorway.

Kei shook her head and then knelt down next to the injured acolyte. "You
should have known better than to get in his way," she chided lightly while
taking stock of his condition. He was lucky to get off with only a broken arm
from slamming into the wall awkwardly. Kei cleared her mind before focusing a
healing spell on his wounded limb. The bone mended itself with little
discomfort coming to the boy. Still, tears streamed down his face even after
his pain was relieved.

"You're afraid, aren't you?" She asked softly.

The boy nodded and dried his tears with the sleeve of his shirt.

"I'm sorry," she combed her fingers through his hair. "The Spirits
aren't bad, but they can be frightening at times. If you'd ever seen the demon
Diablos you would know the truth of what I'm saying. Save your fear for other
things that are more worthy of it."



Xu ran down the gravel path as fast as she could. Unfortunately, the
loose gravel impeded her speed. She had already lost sight of Enju. Despite
her outward panic, she closed her eyes and sought him out with her inner
spirit. Carbuncle was roused by her disturbing thoughts and anxiety. It
prompted her as to which direction he'd gone and she resumed running, taking
her cues from her companion.

There were only so many places to hide in the compound and the trees
weren't sturdy for him to scale up. But... That didn't mean he wouldn't have
taken to perching on someone's roof. Carbuncle agreed with that thought and
nudged her towards the equipment garage near the outer wall.

The garage was taller than most of the single story buildings that her
clansmen preferred to build. It was where the equipment used for farming and
other maintenance tasks was stored. Only a few people had a key to get in and
they only entered long enough to retrieve or return something. No one would be
in the building to notice the sounds of someone walking on the roof. Plus the
flat surface would give Enju plenty of space to stay away from the edge and
remain unnoticed. It was the perfect hiding spot for him.

Xu looked around for a convenient means of getting up to the roof. There
were no boxes or ladders lying around. Hmm... The building was close enough to
the wall that working her way up between the two structures wouldn't be
impossible, just very difficult. Xu quickly stripped off her excess clothing,
leaving her in a sleeveless tee shirt and a pair of loose fitting shorts.

While struggling to get herself up, Xu made a mental note to have an
obstacle like this constructed for the Training Center. Angling herself around
so that she could pull herself the rest of the way onto the roof, she was
pleased to know that her efforts weren't wasted. Enju was lying motionless in
the exact center.

He was lost somewhere in his Puzzle Stone it seemed. He barely
acknowledged her presence, not even responding as she drew closer to him. Given
the way he'd left, she expected him to nearly snap the instant he sensed her
presence. But everything about him was cold, buried somewhere deep within. Even
the foreboding of Diablos that she felt in the elder's meeting hall was gone.

Xu took a deep breath and braced herself for using her own Puzzle Stone.
A part of her was relieved in the certainty that he was venting in his
workshop; the rest of her feared that if he was left alone, that venting might
not be enough. All of Balamb's efforts to reform him might be shattered in a
few hours, and Xu was afraid of her entire clan being murdered. Enju's eyes
were distorted enough to not even care if he killed women and children.

Xu's eyes closed and she felt herself slip into a trance.

She found Enju's workshop easily enough. But the sight that greeted her
made her hold her breath. His workshop had been reduced to nothing more than
debris. Tables or chairs had been slashed apart. The racks of weaponry had been
torn down; the weapons themselves scattered across the floor. The paper screens
and mats bore the marks of having been mercilessly attacked. Wooden frames were
strewn all over the place. And the constant lights whose source seemed to be
beyond her were now flickering and dim.

Carbuncle's protective aura flared to life as it squeaked at the risk Xu
was now taking by being here. Xu glanced around the ruins of the workshop, and
unexpectedly came face to face with the towering form of Diablos. The GF did
nothing but silently look down at her, and then turn its head towards the heart
of the workshop.

Enju was there, standing but hunched over. His shoulders rose and fell
with each deep, laborious breath he took. Xu wondered how much time had passed
in here for him to exhaust himself like this. She also took note of the katana
in Enju's left hand, and the kusarigama in his right hand.

When Xu took another cautious step forward, Enju tilted his head
slightly. "Go away," he said in a low voice. She couldn't tell if he was still
burning in rage or defeated by it.

"You're hurt..." Xu reached a helping hand, but without turning to her,
he made a warning slash in the air with his katana.

"Leave me alone, Xu. I don't want to kill you." He swallowed, and felt
the bitterness of it all move down his throat. "And to an extent, I don't want
to kill them. But it's very hard for me not to let go and...."

His voice trailed off.

He was on the brink of not caring anymore and going one step further. If
he was to be denied a life, then no one here would have one either. He would
take them all with him. He wanted to, with every inch of his being that seethed
in rage.

"I'm afraid to leave you alone," Xu admitted. "I'm afraid to think that
I'm the only thing keeping you from doing something you'll never be forgiven
for."

Enju started to laugh, but it was a hollow echo of what Xu knew him to
be. She couldn't tell if or when it dissolved into shallow sobs. "Why is it
that when I put my demons behind me, I find the world wanting me to return to
them?"

He abruptly collapsed to his knees, releasing his hold on his weapons.
The two blades fell to the floor, and Enju let his arms hang limply at his
sides.

"Why can't I be Enju anymore?"

Xu raced forward, jumping over the small piles of debris as Enju's body
pitched forward. She caught him in her arms before his face would have hit the
floor, and he was like a dead weight. His blue eyes were open but vacant.

It felt strangely awkward for Xu to hold him almost like a mother would a
child. She tried to make him as comfortable as possible, but feared it wouldn't
do much good.

Enju's lips moved only once more, and he cried in a whisper of despair,
"Why doesn't anybody want me...?"



Xu resisted the urge to fall asleep while waiting in the Anshin infirmary
building. The Anshin idea of medicine relied primarily on mysticism with a few
practicalities thrown in to keep it from being completely backwards. That
explained why the recovery room lacked many of the medical gadgets that Doctor
Kadowaki made use of every day. Without the technologies of the north, the
bleeps and the ambient buzz of electrical equipment, the room was an eerie
quiet. Thankfully her mind was taken off of it when Kei stepped in.

"How is he?" she asked.

Xu looked over at Enju, who was resting on a cot. His expression was
peaceful, but void of any emotion. It almost looked like he was dead. "Same as
before," she answered.

Ever since he collapsed in Xu's arms he remained locked away somewhere in
the depths of his Puzzle Stone. His entire body seemed to be treating it as if
he was comatose. Enju never awakened, never responded to any physical stimulus.
It was as if he'd shut the entire world away and refused to leave the tattered
remains of his workshop.

There had come a point where Xu knew that she could no longer stay with
him in the Puzzle Stone, and she left him. After returning from the Puzzle
Stone she discovered that the day had turned into night and that any searchers
the elders might have sent for them had long since given up. Enju's body was
still limp and being embraced in her arms. He had remained like that now for
five hours, going on six.

Daybreak would be coming soon and with it Quistis' return. Xu worried
about how she would explain this to Quistis; everything was a lot more
complicated than it first appeared. Would she be able to convey all the beliefs
and encounters that had gone on before, finally culminating in Enju's
condition?

"He'll be fine," Kei said, trying to reassure her cousin. "Enju's always
been too stubborn to let himself be broken for long. He'll be back up and
annoying us in no time."

Abruptly Enju made a sound, almost as if he had heard Kei. It wasn't a
word or anything coherent, but it was the first sound she'd heard from him
since she and Kei had rallied some other adults to help carry Enju to the
compound's infirmary.

He might have been dreaming. If he was, Xu hoped he was having pleasant
dreams for once.



Enju awoke on his stomach somewhere inside the tattered remains of his
workshop. His eyes slowly opened as he heard Diablos stirring behind him.
Presumably the GF was perched at the edge of its usual bench. He couldn't fully
recall when he'd gone to work at his Puzzle Stone. He couldn't even recall when
he'd gone to sleep.

The rancor towards the Anshin elders was still burning in him, and the
pain refused to be abated. His arms were free of the kote, pale white skin
shimmering in the dimness of the workshop. Every last detail of the falling
angel feathers seemed perfect.

Enju forced himself to move, raising himself up with his arms. His baby
blue eyes drifted from one end of the workshop to the other, surveying the
damage he'd caused. A small part of him was impressed with the amount of havoc
he had wrecked.

And then he suddenly found himself staring at himself.

Another Enju was leaning against the far wall, right next to a rack of
long swords and polearms. It was like staring into a mirror that should not
have been there. He recognized the thin, telltale ponytail of auburn hair
draped over his doppelganger's shoulders. Yet there was something else that was
chillingly distinct about this second Enju--aside from the strange, dark robes
he wore.

This Enju's eyes were like amber.

"Well," the other Enju remarked as he surveyed the workshop. "You sure
did a number on this place. Although I should remind you that these sorts of
workshops don't come with a janitor; you'll have to clean this mess up
yourself."

"You... you're me," Enju whispered in shock.

What the hell was going on? Was this the Puzzle Stone's way of
retaliating for him trashing his workshop like this? He didn't even get the
pleasure of remembering the destruction he reigned.

The other Enju smiled cryptically and gave a partial nod. "In a manner of
speaking, more or less. But while we may share many of the same traits, we also
share even more differences."

Enju rose from the mats, the disbelief and surprise dying down.
Everything suddenly clicked as he stood on his feet and appraised the one who
was also Enju yet not fully Enju. Confusion was replaced with weary aggression.

Enju sighed, shaking his head at the stranger. "So, you're him, huh?" he
remarked in an icy tone. "You're Silence."

The Spirit bowed slightly, though he did not move from his leaning post
against the wall. The arms that were crossed over his chest did not part.

Enju let a dark laugh escape his mouth. He knelt down and fished out from
the wreckage on the floor a sheathed katana. The scabbard was pulled off and
flung aside, revealing the shining metal of the blade. "Nice to meet you at
last. Now give me one good reason why I shouldn't kill you where you stand."

With a mildly amused grin, the Spirit answered, "Because it's impossible
for you to kill me."

Enju readied himself to deliver an attack. "There's nothing wrong with
trying."

"But it will still prove a vain effort and ultimately accomplish
nothing," the Spirit countered. It pushed away from the wall and took a few
steps towards Enju. "There's no need for any enmity between us."

"What?!" Enju snapped angrily. "You're the damn reason this is happening
to me in the first place! If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't be here right now!"
He was seething, his shoulders rising and falling with each breath he took. The
glare that had possessed him earlier in the workshop was starting to glaze over
his eyes. He readjusted his grip on the katana.

"I'm not even me anymore," he hissed. "All I am now is the Spirit of
Silence. It's like neither Enju, Sarkis or the Death's Angel ever existed. I
can't escape you, let alone escape being you. All I was ever meant to be was
you--and you've done nothing but fuck up my entire life!!"

He sprang, his crouched form lunging for the Spirit. The Spirit merely
watched him with calm, amber eyes. For a moment, amidst the blur of adrenaline
and metal, Enju could have sworn the Spirit's eyes flickered in light and
colour. The next thing he knew, his body crashed down onto the mats. He tumbled
backwards, the katana lost from his grip.

Enju bounced a few more times before sliding to a stop against a pile of
workshop debris. He winced as he painfully got up, his arms and legs raw and
bleeding from mat burn. But the pain was only second to the anger still
mirrored in his eyes as he turned back to the Spirit of Silence.

"I'm not apologizing for what has happened," the Spirit answered coolly.
He was clearly unafraid of Enju's growing rage. And now Enju understood why.
"The events of your life had to unfold the way they did--but while I'm
responsible for orchestrating my dream, to walk in your footsteps, you chose
this path of your own accord. It makes for a strange give and take between free
will and a Spirit's conspiracy, I admit, but that is the way it had to be
done."

"Well, I'm thrilled to no end," Enju retorted, black sarcasm dripping
from every word. He cradled one of his elbows and absently wondered if a scrape
like this would be transferred over to the real world. Dream world. Whatever
the hell reality he usually found himself in. "So where does that leave you and
me?" he asked.

The answer he got wasn't one he was expecting.

"They're right, you know," the Spirit stated.

"Who?"

"The elders. You have to leave the Garden, Enju. You have to leave
Quistis and the sooner the better. Everything has to be left behind."

Enju's gaze darted around the floor, searching for another weapon. "Why?
Why should I listen to you, when you said I somehow have my own say in the
matter."

"The choice to stay or go is yours," the Spirit clarified. "But if you
remain, the future could be an unfortunate one. The Anshin elders are trying to
convince you to give the future its best chance as a favorable outcome--and
that regrettably means leaving Balamb. They failed, and so I'm here with the
hope that you can understand the severity of the situation."

Enju cracked a sardonic grin. "I thought I understood the situation. But
until you give me a reason to leave other than some abstract 'your task as a
Spirit is done' crap, I will be returning with the others to the Garden."

"How about the Angel of Death?"

Enju stiffened.

The Spirit saw it and continued, "You know that certain parties have been
searching you out. They believe you are alive, and want revenge. Sooner or
later they will come to Balamb. And the ones you care about, they will be at
risk."

At least the Spirit wasn't so sadistically blunt as the Anshin elders had
been. If those geezers had gone about telling him in this way, there might have
been no need to destroy his workshop.

"Was it your idea to have me be an assassin?" he asked quietly. "Or do I
get to hit myself for it?"

"When the time comes, you can hit us both," the Spirit answered with a
laugh. "I hadn't expected me--you, to take that sort of course. But I can see
that through it we were both able to help prepare the others for what lies
ahead."

"Can you tell me what lies ahead?"

The Spirit shook his head. "I don't even fully know what that is myself.
That's why so many Spirits have been dreaming. And Balamb Garden will become
the catalyst. All hope lies within whatever SeeDs, cadets, and teachers are
there."

Enju took a deep breath, momentarily closing his eyes. He didn't want to
have to say what he was going to say. It would be the final nail upon his
coffin. Another life wasted, gone, lost again. He would be forced to find
emptiness and solitude all over.

"If I remain," he said slowly, eyes fixated on his Spirit counterpart,
"that hope might get snuffed out before it even has a chance."

The Spirit nodded. "I'm sorry, but there's no other way. The mercenaries
looking for Death's Angel are ruthless. They would not hesitate to attack SeeD,
or even kill children to get to you." For once, he looked anxious. "I can
sometimes catch a glimpse of the future, a blurred ripple. From what I have
seen of futures that might be, if you stay at Balamb, Quistis will die. And it
will be because she will try to protect you from those killers."

The blood drained from Enju's face, making him paler than usual. To say
he was feeling sick to his stomach was an understatement. The last thing he
wanted was for Quistis to die. She was the reason he had learned what it meant
to not just live, but to be alive. Enju looked at the tattoos on his forearms.
He had silently promised himself to protect her at any cost. And now that he
saw what the cost was, he could feel the resolve wavering.

He could argue about the future being unknown, of it being only what he
made of it. But he was a Spirit too. Somewhere deep within he knew that he had
to leave. For a long time he stood in silence, forcing back whatever pain was
left.

"Okay, you win," he at last conceded. "I'll take the transport back to
Balamb Garden and grab my weapons. When the night comes, I'll disappear for
good."

The Spirit gave another cryptic smile. "Now who said you'd be
disappearing for good?"

Enju bent over and began the process of cleaning up his mess. Through his
use of the Stone he discovered that it would do some of the clean up and
repairs on its own, but it was still up to him to put his toys away. He
glanced over at Diablos, who hadn't so much as made a low growl while he and
the Spirit spoke.

"I'm not even sure how I can be talking to you right now," he remarked.
"I mean, aren't you actually supposed to *be* me currently?"

The Spirit gave a very familiar wolfish grin, and Enju could see just how
alike they were. "Time doesn't move as linear along the Path as it does for
you. Don't ask me how to explain; I haven't figured it out yet." He glanced
over to his side as if something else had caught his attention. From what Enju
could see, the Spirit seemed to be listening to a voice. Probably from whatever
plane of existence that Spirits hailed from.

"Before you go," he said to Enju. "May I ask a favour of you?"

One of Enju's eyebrows went up.

The Spirit shook his head. "Not for me. But for a good friend."



Enju opened his eyes slowly to see a plaster ceiling over his head. They
must have moved him indoors. Absently he wondered how long he'd locked himself
away. Turning his head to the left, he saw Xu sitting cross-legged in a chair
next to him. She still held one of his hands in her own, and looked to have
dozed off.

He gave her hand a gentle squeeze, and her eyes opened. Xu smiled when
she saw him awake. "How do you feel?" Her voice was rough from disuse. Poor
Xu, she must have been sitting here all night.

"Better than you I'm guessing," he sat up and shook his head. One hand
wiped the grit out of his eyes while the other straightened his tousled hair.

"I thought I should let you know beforehand," he said quietly. "I'm only
going back to Balamb for my weapons. After that, I don't think we'll see each
other again. If not ever, then not for a very long time to come."

Xu bowed her head, knowing that this was the way things had to be.
Talasu warned them, as did the elders. It was a terribly cruel twist of fate,
but the matter was out of their hands.

"Are you going to tell Quistis?"

He remained quiet for several minutes studying his hands and forearms
before answering. "No. It would be easier if I just slipped away. But... I
did promise to take her to Balamb to buy her the game she plays with Kei."

"You want to fulfill your promise to her?"

Enju said nothing. The look in his eyes was enough to answer her
question.

Xu nodded. "Once we arrive in Balamb there's no reason for a pair of
cadets to return immediately. Only SeeDs need to report back."

It was her oblique way of giving him permission to take Quistis out on a
final date. They could have their afternoon together before he left for good.
It would be a difficult thing for him, having this sad event looming over him,
but persistent grief was an emotion he was becoming accustomed to.

Xu's heart when out to him. He was living with a knife at his back,
constantly prodding him to keep moving on threat of death. Death wasn't
something that he feared for himself. But he learned to value the lives of
others while at Balamb. He couldn't risk the deaths of those innocents because
of the mistakes of his past.

Enju stood up. "I don't suppose there's somewhere I can get something to
eat," he patted his stomach. "It's been a while since I ate lunch."

"I'm sure we can find you something," Xu gave him a relieved smile as she
got up. Things weren't going to be okay, but they could try to make them turn
out as well as possible.

Enju slipped out of the cot and began to walk around to stretch his legs.
Right now they felt like rubber. Some outside exercise would do him good right
about now. He headed towards the door, but then stopped.

"I almost forgot," he added, turning around. He walked up to Xu, his tall
form towering over her. "I was supposed to give this to you."

He leaned forward and gently kissed her on the lips.

Xu's eyes widened. She didn't even know why he was doing it--but for some
odd reason, the kiss was warm and familiar. She found her eyes slowly closing,
and was strangely disappointed when Enju broke away.

"A present from Sean," Enju explained. "And... Oh, how did he put it?
'Even if I can't massage your back like last time, I'll still watch it for
you.'"

Before Xu could say anything else, Enju quietly slipped out of the
infirmary door, stretching his stiff arms.

*****

No one saw much of Enju the following day. Kei made it a point to avoid
him since the last thing he needed was his rival in his face about something.

Xu first saw him when he was returning from a monster killing session
outside the compound. In theory, the guard shouldn't have let him pass since
the trial was still ongoing. Enju wouldn't have had anything against shoving
the guard aside, but it was more likely that he simply found a way over the
wall and back again.

"Are you okay?" Xu called to him, noticing that he was covered in blood
and gore.

Enju waved her off. "Believe me, I look better than the other guy does
right about now." He continued on his way towards Kei's parent's house to
clean up. "Damn magic wielding monsters."

"Wait, you should go to my parent's place instead," Xu closed the gap
between them. "You'll anger the elder, scare Kei's siblings, and upset the
people in the well courtyard along the way if you go to Kei's house. My
parent's house is closer and you won't bother anyone if you go there to clean
up."

"Fine," he changed course and walked the other way. Xu shook her head
with chagrin and went back to what she was doing. Her mother would be startled
to see him soiled as he was, but would get him taken care of nonetheless.

The next time Xu spotted Enju he was sporting a new set of clothes made
in the Anshin tradition. She couldn't help but laugh at how awkward he looked
wearing them. Manners demanded that he wore them for at least a day, but they
just weren't his style.

*****

The next day was filled with anxious anticipation. The children on the
rite were coming in today. Xu set up a lawn chair near the front gate and
planted herself down with a book. She fully intended to wait there until
Quistis showed up. Kei came by and laughed, saying that she had nothing to
worry about.

As far as her fellow clansmen were concerned, it was a display of her
protection of the children to be watching over the return. Kei's father had
seemed quite smug when he came by to check up on her. Xu wanted to point out
that she was only waiting for Quistis, but when she saw the silent thanks in
some of the concerned parents' eyes she held her tongue. She was waiting, just
like them. If believing that she was actually doing something while sitting
there made their wait easier, so be it.

The first child arrived shortly after the sun broke over the horizon.
That was to be expected. There were always a couple children who kept fairly
close to the compound on the last evening so that they could get back within
the safety of its walls as soon as it was allowed.

Xu didn't leave her post when it was time for the mid-day meal. Kei came
around again and brought her something to eat. Over half the children were
back and Quistis wasn't among them.

Tradition stated that when a child returned they greeted the guard at the
gate first and then sought out the elders. After the elders declared them to
be an adult, they were permitted to return to their homes covered in glory.

Xu's own coming of age had broken many of the traditions. Besides
killing a few Jelleyes while she was out, she didn't greet the guard or go
before the elders. She went straight to her parent's home and collapsed. Xu
wasn't sure if she was glad or not that she remembered so little of the trial
and the week that followed. According to her mother she'd been poisoned and
was delirious with fever. The elders didn't pass her as an adult until she was
well enough to walk over to their council room and present herself.

She was sore that night, but she'd been sore for the week leading up to
it, so nothing had changed. It was more than two weeks after the trial before
she was finally free of pain. Intellectually, she knew that her trial was one
of the fouler ones that had occurred in recent memory. It was unsettled fear
from that experience that caused her to worry so much about Quistis.

The afternoon passed slowly. By dinnertime Xu was more than halfway
through her book and there were still two children left to come in. Sighing
heavily, she turned the page and continued reading.

"Here's something to eat," Kei offered her a dinner plate and pulled some
utensils out of a pocket. She was no longer laughing at Xu's worry. By her
own reckoning, Quistis should have returned hours ago.

"Have you seen Enju today?" Xu asked, taking her mind off of one missing
party member to wonder where the other was.

"Yeah, he's been curled up in the guest room sleeping all day."

"I can't see him sleeping that much," Xu replied thoughtfully. "He's
probably working with his Puzzle Stone."

"He's really taken to it?"

Xu finished chewing the morsel in her mouth before answering. "Now that
he's figured out how to solicit answers from it, he seems to be using it more
often."

"Huh, well, I'll go make sure that he eats something today. When Quistis
comes in, let me know." Kei returned the way she'd came.

Xu quickly ate the food on her plate before tucking the flatware under
the relative safety of her chair. It wasn't likely that anyone would step on
it there. The guard coughed and gave her a sympathetic look. The last Anshin
child greeted him and then waved wearily to her before seeking out the elders.

Xu sucked in a deep breath and let it out slowly. So Quistis would be
the last one to return after all. She tried to keep her mind from imagining
the worst. Quistis was nearly a SeeD. She was more than capable of taking
care of herself. This shouldn't have been a challenge for her.

A half-hour passed and Xu was becoming truly concerned. She couldn't go
looking for her -- that would disqualify Quistis and bring shame on the girl
and SeeD. Kei showed up again to retrieve her mother's plate and utensils.

"Anything yet?"

Xu shook her head. Abruptly, the guard straightened up. Quistis
answered his challenge with a salute and passed through the gate. Xu was on
her feet, ready to tackle her friend and give her a hug. Kei put a restraining
hand on Xu's shoulder and waved to Quistis as she walked passed. Quistis had
one more thing to do before Xu could welcome her back.

"She looks none the worse for wear," Kei said while helping Xu gather her
things. "I'll see you at your place after I've returned the plate."

Xu put her father's lawn chair away before entering the house. Her
parents had moved into the living room and were working on their quiet tasks
when she came into the room.

"I take it Kwis has returned?" Her father looked up from his papers.

"That she has. She's gone to see the elders as we speak." Xu went into
the kitchen to prepare something for Quistis to eat when she came in. She'd
likely be very hunger or very tired (or both).

Kei let herself into the house, greeted Xu's parents, and then made
herself comfortable in Xu's room. Xu joined her shortly with Quistis' dinner.
They heard the front door open and close, and Xu's parents greet Quistis as she
passed through the living room.

"Hey," Quistis let herself in and closed the door behind herself. Xu got
up from the bed and brought her into a careful hug. Quistis returned the
embrace.

"Welcome back and congratulations," Xu squeezed her once more before
directing her to sit and eat her dinner. Quistis attacked the meal with
ferocity.

"So," Kei drawled, "what took you so long to come in?"

"I figured that you wanted me to make sure everyone else made it in
first," she explained between bites. "The last child had absolutely no sense
of direction. She kept wandering off the wrong way. I'd throw a rock to catch
her attention. She'd walk up to where the rock landed, and then veer off
again. It took me two hours to lead her back to where the compound was within
seeing distance."

Kei chuckled lightly at her plight. "How does it feel to be an Anshin
adult?"

"I was already an adult," Quistis reminded her with a smile. "As for
being Anshin, it feels just like being Galbadian, which feels just like being
from Balamb."

"Did you accept their 'reward'?" Kei inquired.

"I already have my mark of adulthood. Plus I'm not too fond of tattoos,
no offense," she said while blushing.

"None taken, I'm not too fond of them either," Kei agreed. "Isn't that
right, Xu?"

The Instructor simply shrugged. "To each their own. You did an
excellent job, Quistis. All the children returned safely. Thank you very much
for going on this 'mission' for us."

"You're welcome," she demurred. "Where's Enju?"

"Ah..." Xu tried to think of what to say.

Fortunately, Kei was there to cover for her. "He's been meditating a lot
lately. It would be best to give him his space until he's worked through
whatever is on his mind."

"Oh," Quistis looked somewhat disappointed that she wouldn't be able
share her accomplishment with him right away. She could tell him about her
adventure when the time was right for him.

"Did you have any visions while you were out?" Xu picked up the
questioning where Kei left off.

"Visions? No. I know that I had a couple odd dreams, but I don't recall
them. I think it was just the lack of food or something like that getting to
me. Usually I sleep like a rock."

"When you put your book down long enough to fall asleep," Xu teased.
"Did you get the chance to study the Jelleyes?"

Quistis nodded.

The next hour was spent discussing her trip and what all she'd seen.
Once that topic was exhausted, Quistis asked if she could attend Anshin school
for the rest of her time here. The question was posed to Xu's father in the
next room and approval given. But if Quistis was going to attend class in the
morning, she needed to get to sleep. Kei took the hint and returned to her
parent's house. Xu laid out a mattress that was used for situations like this
and Quistis settled down for her first peaceful sleep in a few days.

*****

Quistis' remaining time with the Anshin was near magical for the young
woman. Even though she was a keenly intelligent person, it was with a
childlike curiosity that she explored the world around her.

The way school was conducted was quite different from that of Balamb.
Book learning was secondary to a hands-on education. It was an environment
Quistis enjoyed experiencing, but wasn't sure she would thrive in. That
revelation caused her to pause and consider how reliant she was upon the books
she often turned to when she was in need of answers. Here, the answers were
found by asking questions and experimentation.

Even with her doubts, she had to admit that she was learning, and that it
was fun. She'd never seen a Chocobo before, for example. They were often
described as over-sized chickens with incredible strength and endurance. The
Anshin maintained a stable of them. When she asked why they would ever choose
riding on a Chocobo somewhere over taking a truck, the stable master -- a
grizzled old man she was assigned to study with because he could speak standard
-- beckoned her to come forward.

"Put out your hand," he instructed her. He put some leafy greens into
her hand then gently pushed her towards one of the stalls. The Chocobo within
took instant notice and stretched its neck to reach her.

Hesitantly she offered the gysahl greens to it. The Chocobo warked
happily and snatched the treat from her. The bird rubbed its beak up against
her still outstretched hand. A small smile came to her face as she moved
closer to stroke back the feathers on its head. Its feathers were a beautiful
golden yellow and vibrant from good health.

"You didn't answer my question," she commented in an off-handed manner as
the stable master watched her from behind.

"I could point out the practicality of conserving our limited fuel by
riding Chocobo-back when we need to send a courier to the port, but that's not
the reason.

"Taking care of Chocobos, as with so many of our ways, goes back to the
clan's founding. It's a part of our heritage -- our tradition -- that we don't
wish to lose. There is a fine line to walk between being foolishly stubborn
and clinging to the old ways, and leaping too quickly to incorporate the new.
We may be on the tail-end of old, but I like it that way."

He stood next to her now and offered another green to the greedy bird.
Once the offering was consumed, it swung its head around hoping to get more
attention from Quistis. She obliged by resuming to stroke its head.

She had wondered why there was only a single terminal in the school. She
supposed that the lack of them was due to the difficulty of use (the Anshin
language was quite a barrier to overcome when everything was in standard).
Never mind the high maintenance that must go into keeping monsters from
destroying the HD lines that connect the Anshin to the rest of the world.

But now she understood. They realized that they couldn't cut themselves
off completely, but that didn't mean they had to submerge in it either. They'd
done well for themselves here in near-isolation. They didn't have much need
for foreigners like herself. They were almost like a people frozen in time,
yet fully aware of their static state.

The bird enjoyed the attention she lavished on it. Bemused by its
antics, something occurred to her. "What's its name?"

Her mentor scratched the rough stubble on his chin as he thought. "What
was its name..?"

"'Little One'," someone answered for him. Both Quistis and the man
turned to see who it was. Xu came forward with her own handful of greens to
offer to the Chocobo.

"That's right," the stable master nodded after having his memory jogged.
"You named him Little One because he wasn't large enough to carry an adult on
his back when you were here."

"He's still on the small side," Xu commented thoughtfully, giving his
head a rub. "So are you going to take him out for a ride?"

Quistis was startled by the question. This was the first time she even
saw a Chocobo. She wasn't ready to try riding one!

The stable master grunted and reached across Quistis to release the
door's latch. It swung out easily on well-greased hinges. Xu grinned with a
touch of mischief in her eyes as she helped prepare Quistis' mount.

Quistis watched her friend securely fasten the riding harness without a
thought. Obviously Xu had done this numerous times and reflexes alone could
lead her through the motions.

"Did you spend a lot of time here when you were younger?" Quistis asked,
wanting her suspicions confirmed.

"I couldn't keep her out," the old man grumbled good-naturedly.

Xu conceded the point with a nod. "This is the place I was most
comfortable. Probably because of the freedom I felt once I was astride a
Chocobo and outside of the walls."

The stable master led Little One out into the practice field. Little One
pushed ahead of them, excited by being let out of his pen and then saddled up
for a rider. Xu stood on the other side of the Chocobo to help stabilize her
while the stable master helped her up. Once she was comfortably seated, he
handed her the reins and meandered over to the gate to open it.

"Have fun out there, but please be back before sundown, okay?" Xu
squeezed her leg.

"Wha-? Wait! I don't know how to control a Chocobo. And won't the
monsters see us and think 'oversized chicken with appetizer'?" She protested.

"The monsters won't touch you as long as you're on the back of a Chocobo.
You'll be safe enough," the stable master waved for her to hurry up and pass
through the gate. "There's another gate at the end of the path, that's the one
that takes you outside the wall. When you return, come back through the
Chocobo gate."

"But..."

Xu gave her leg another squeeze. "You don't need to do anything. Little
One will guide the way. He's a well-trained Chocobo. I don't suspect you'll
get into too much trouble. Now get going." With that she slapped the Chocobo
on the hind. The bird took its cue and made a beeline for the gate. Quistis
held on tight, as she was apparently the one along for the ride.

"Aren't you coming?" Quistis called back before she was out of earshot.

Xu shook her head and replied softly. "I don't need to escape this place
any more."

The stable master closed the gate once Quistis had passed through and was
on her way towards the Chocobo gate. Xu took up a place leaned up against a
shared fence between this field and the next one over that was for grazing.
She watched the birds intently until the stable master broke the silence.

"You get to ride often where you live?" He leaned against the fence and
watched the birds with her. This was the mental image Xu had of the man. For
as long as she could remember, he was always here tending to the Chocobos.

"Not at all. The Garden doesn't maintain any stables in Balamb."

"That's a shame," he commented without putting much thought into what he
said. "If you had stayed here I'm sure you would have made an excellent
replacement when I got too old to tend to the birds properly."

Xu didn't answer. That fact was, she didn't stay. For as much as she
loved riding she couldn't see herself being happy as a stable hand. The work
was hard, not that it bothered her, but it was also mediocre. It didn't
challenge her enough. She could only take satisfaction in the simple for so
long.

"So what is it that you do out there that you can't do here?" It wasn't
meant as a snide question. His world view was only that of the clan. His
question acknowledged that he had a limited understanding of the rest of the
world and what things might occupy a person's time.

She rested her chin on her folded arms across the fence. "I'm a teacher
of things the clan doesn't approve of."

"Ah... And is the Kwis girl one of your students?" He asked.

"You could call her that. Though she's more my friend than a student."

He nodded, then spoke thoughtfully. "She has a lot to learn still. As a
friend and a teacher, you need to help her."

Xu gave him a questioning look. This was his first day with Quistis.
How could he make any judgements about her after such a short time?

"She's as wet as a just hatched Chocobo. Smart, I'll give you that, but
naive. It's nothing she shouldn't grow out of with time."

"Quistis is going to graduate from the Garden soon," Xu added
thoughtfully.

He smirked and then pushed off the fence to return to the stable. "Don't
worry too much, but do keep an eye on her. You were just as green when I got
my hands on you and look how you turned out; nice and strong. A bit of rough
riding makes for a stronger mount, wouldn't you agree?"

What he was saying had nothing to do with Chocobos. He was suggesting
that if life knocked Quistis around a bit, it would make her a stronger person.
Xu couldn't disagree with the idea, though it could hurt like hell during the
process.

Quistis' growth did cause her to worry. Quistis was a very intelligent
person, but there was a difference between scholastic aptitude and emotional
maturity. And she had a lot of physical growth to undergo as well. The next
year was likely to be a wild one. At least girls tended to mature faster than
boys, else she'd have to worry for the next five years or so...

Xu had wasted enough time watching the Chocobos. She walked back to the
compound proper before detouring down the path that would take her to the
elder's council building. She wished to speak with them about their recent
diplomatic bumblings before they managed to alienate someone.

She knew from speaking with Michelle that Dollet had been in contact with
the Anshin regarding building a permanent dock. (Not that there wasn't one
already, but it was crude in its construction and unsuited for most types of
ships). The elders' response had been that they belonged to the land, not vise
versa. If Dollet wished to establish a dock, the Anshin wouldn't stop them,
but they shouldn't expect any help either. It was a foolish response, in Xu's
opinion. Dollet was reaching out an olive branch to them and the Anshin were
batting it away. A project like this could bring some very good things to the
clan if they didn't blow the opportunity.

The elders council had maintained the same schedule for generations, so
she knew when to catch all five of them at once. Her family's ranking as
commoners didn't usually offer them the opportunity to stand before the elders
without being presented by a member of one of the middle families. A middle
family's ranking wasn't something that was envied. They were the ones expected
to resolve conflicts within the clan without having to bring the matter before
the elders. It was seen as a failing on their part if the elders had to get
involved. Xu didn't have the time to track down a middle family to represent
her and so she used her ranking as a Spirit to get an audience with the elders.
They would hear her out for that reason alone.

The elders were lined up seated on their cushions. Xu sat opposite of
them with those others who had business with the elders today lining the walls
waiting their turn. She bowed respectfully to them before speaking.

"I asked to speak with the elders so that I may offer some advice to
them," she said formally.

"Please offer us your guidance, Spirit," the head elder replied in kind.

"I believe that you're making a mistake by not accepting Dollet's offer
to build a new dock."

The elders shuffled. This likely wasn't the topic they were expecting
her to bring up. "We have told them that they may build a dock if they wish,
but to please make it in harmony with the land."

'They're missing the point...' Xu thought before forging ahead. "Dollet
doesn't understand what you mean by that. They'll build a dock that is
pleasing to the eye, but does nothing for the soul if you don't advise them."

The elders didn't respond. They knew what she said was true. Those from
the north didn't understand how to build their homes and their lives in a way
that produced harmony within.

"Might I suggest that you appoint an ambassador to Dollet to represent
the clan's interests?"

A gasp ran through the room. Xu looked to either side of her and saw the
stunned faces of her clansmen. Was proper representation really that big of a
deal?

"I'm afraid we can't go along with such an assertive move," Kei's father
began to explain.

"You *must* if you want things to remain in balance. Dollet is quite
interested in establishing a trade route this far south. I won't go into how
it may benefit the clan to open its trade channels, but it's important that you
accept such gestures of goodwill by outsiders. You can't live in fear of the
rest of the world, not when it's finally taking notice of Centra."

Kei's father hmph-ed and ruffled his robes with indignation. Xu sighed
and bowed again to indicate that she had said her piece.

"We'll consider your advice," the head elder assured. Xu was certain that
'consider' would consist of the five seconds of Kei's father balking before
they dropped the idea to get him to shut up. Her uncle was such a pain
sometimes.

Walking back slowly to her parent's home she thought about it more. The
Anshin already had a small degree of trade going on with the outside world
(mostly in the form of handcrafts). A partnership with Dollet could expand
that greatly.

'That's probably what they're afraid of,' Xu chided herself. They don't
want to show up on the map. Well, it's too late for that. The busting up of
the child smuggling ring gave them a place in recent history along with all the
other victims. People were curious creatures by nature and would seek out as
much as they could find if the topic proved intriguing enough. The Anshin
weren't that interesting for most people, but for some they were fascinating.
No, there was no going back after the genie was let out of the bottle.



Quistis returned from her Chocobo ride with a gleam in her eye. She'd
never experienced anything quite like it. She told Xu all about it over a cup
of tea as they talked after dinner. Xu's parents had already retreated to
their living room. It was only the two of them in the small kitchen.

"Xu," Quistis began somewhat hesitantly after her telling was through.
"You told me to save my questions about the Anshin until after I returned from
the rite. May I ask them now?"

The older woman nodded her acceptance. There was no putting off Quistis
forever once something had caught her interest. "What would you like to know?"

"What's it like to be a Spirit? Do you have extraordinary powers? How
did you get to be one? What does it mean?"

Xu laughed and held up her hands at the deluge of questions that flowed
forth from her companion. "One at a time!

"Now, was is it like? I don't know, to be honest. I only know what it's
like to be *me* and that was a discovery that took me a while to make.

"Extraordinary powers? Well, there is a lot we still don't know about
magic. Carbuncle is bound tightly to me. I think it's his magic that lends
itself to me. But the most extraordinary power I have is one that you do as
well: the ability to change the world. Even through small acts we can
influence each other. A smile can brighten someone's day while a reprimand can
sour them, for example. Our recognizing the cause and effect of every day
living and then using it is a skill all unto itself.

"And... I've forgotten the rest of your questions," Xu shook her head at
herself.

Quistis smiled at that, knowing that Xu honestly had lost track of the
questions and wasn't trying to dodge the subject.

They continued to speak until long after Xu's parents had gone to bed.
It reminded Quistis of the long discussions she and Xu used to have when they
were cadets. Both of them were older now and had other responsibilities to
stand in the way of their bonding. Quistis decided to not let that be so.
There was still so much that she could learn from Xu that she wouldn't let a
convienent lack of time prevent her from having the occasional deep
conversation with her friend.

*****

Quistis was glad to be back when she stepped out onto the train platform
and was greeted by a gust of Balamb's salty sea air. But by the same token,
she was also somewhat disappointed for having to bring an end to her adventures
down south.

With the permission of the elders, Xu's father presented her with a few
books so that she could continue learning the Anshin ways. At least, that's
what he told the elders. He realized that they were more of a novelty item for
her, a memento of her time spent with them. Xu's mother likewise gave her a
parting gift; her own outfit made in the traditional style. Quistis didn't
think she'd have many occasions to wear it, but it was a thoughtful gift
nonetheless.

As Kei predicted, Xu made out like a bandit with several new dresses.
Kei tried to tease her cousin about her femininity, but none of her jabs hit
the mark -- not when it was something Xu was proud of.

During the return trip, Enju refrained from joining in on the banter.
And that wasn't for lack of opportunity. Xu had Kei nearly pinned multiple
times where Enju could have swooped in for the 'kill' if he wanted, but he
didn't.

Enju just hadn't been the same since she left for her 'mission'.
Something happened, but no one was willing to spill the beans. He didn't even
take up her hand when they sat next to each other in the train's booth. More
than anything, he just sat quietly in his seat, staring out at the landscape
moving past them. Enju was bold enough that Kei sitting across from them
wouldn't usually deter him from doing what he wanted if he wished. No,
something was definitely wrong.

Quistis shook off that feeling as the four of them gathered at the bottom
of the stairs of the train platform to discuss what to do next. To her
pleasant surprise Xu suggested that Quistis and Enju take the rest of the day
off to putter around town. She and Kei had to return to the Garden to report
in, but that shouldn't stop them from enjoying the rest of the day.

The sadness that loomed in Enju's eyes lifted as one of his most charming
smiles touched his lips. It was one of those grins that usually infuriated Kei
when he turned it on her. Quistis glanced over at the oldest member of their
group. Kei was pointedly ignoring Enju by searching for something in one of
the pouches of her travel bag.

"Well, who am I to ignore my Instructor," Enju took her hand up into his
and led her away. "You heard Xu, my dear; let's go paint Balamb whatever colour
you so desire."

The two SeeDs watched them disappear around the corner before anything
further was said.

"Let's get something to eat," Kei suggested, slinging her bag onto her
shoulder.

"We can eat at the Garden".

Kei pouted. "I don't want Garden food. I want to get lunch at the cafe
by the pier."

"You want to trail Enju and Quistis around," Xu called her bluff.

The older woman pled innocence and headed towards the pier. Xu knew
Kei's motives, but maybe if she could keep her cousin away from Enju and
Quistis, those two would be allowed the time that they need. Xu shared Kei's
curiosity, but she understood that this afternoon would be a memorable one for
Enju and didn't wish to intrude.



The sea breeze continued to play with Quistis' hair as she and Enju
walked along the shopping arcade. They walked with their hands loosely held
together, almost as though they were dating. And even though he was keeping
himself in check, every time Enju looked at her his gaze held a warm affection,
like he wanted to be with her forever. A small part of Quistis' mind fancied
the idea before it was displaced by reality.

It was a quiet day, but something was definitely off. She couldn't
explain the chill that ran up nape of her neck. It felt as though they were
being watched. Enju didn't seem disturbed, acting as casual as usual. He took
her into a few stores, and they maintained an animated conversation. While he
was doing less of the talking, it was clear he was enjoying their time
together.

As they walked out from one of the stores, discreetly Quistis took note
of her surroundings. What she discovered more than justified the unease she
was feeling. She hoped that she was wrong, but it wasn't likely.

She pulled her companion toward the window of a shop where she could
still see behind them in the reflection. Pointing at one of the dolls on
display she leaned her head against his shoulder affectionately and whisper, "I
think we're being followed."

"Clever girl," Enju chuckled, playfully tousling her hair. But now she
knew it was just an act not to give them away. "There's three of them on the
street--and a fourth one skulking on the rooftops above. They've been shadowing
us for the past ten minutes."

"Fifteen, actually. They started appearing back at the pet shop," she
corrected.

That brought a grin to his face that could be seen in the window's
reflection. "Show off."

"Who are they?"

"They seem to think calling themselves the Blood Souls will somehow
inspire fear. Reality is otherwise. They're an old contract of mine; want to be
smugglers operating out of Dollet. The reason you only see four and not their
usual ten is because I killed everyone else a couple years back. They're
probably still pissed about that."

Quistis appraised their situation. If it came down to a fight it would
be four-on-two. She had her rante with her and a full stock of offensive
spells. The odds weren't in their favor, but they should be okay if Enju was
likewise armed.

Enju's eyes narrowed as he nudged her away from the window and they began
walking. Out from the corner of his vision he saw two men that were following
them start to move in. A third man was almost subtlety in position ahead of
them, pretending to read a newspaper on a bench. Enju knew an ambush when he
saw it.

"Quistis," he said with a false smile. "These boys are my business. I can
handle them easily if I don't have any distractions. Get out of here while you
still can."

Quistis looked at him like he'd lost his mind.

"I don't want you involved," the firmness in his voice was like steel.
"Turn at the intersection up ahead, and get into the nearest store. I'll keep
walking." He glanced down at her. "They're expecting me by the bench; I'm not
about to disappoint them."

He feigned stretching out an arm to place around Quistis' shoulders. In
truth he was tensing his muscles and preparing for battle.

"I won't leave," Quistis stated. "Four-on-one is a tough battle, even
for you. We should head back toward the train depot. They wouldn't make a
scene in public, would they?"

"They'd burn this entire town if it meant they could kill me. Keeping
quiet about it is the last thing on their minds," he answered ruefully.

Dammit, couldn't she see what he wanted? Why couldn't she listen? If he
was alone, he could revert back into Death's Angel in a heartbeat and kill
everyone before they even knew what happened. But she was too much a
distraction. As an assassin, he had only needed to care for himself--and even
then he cared very little for his life. A reckless thing, yes, but it had given
him an edge.

He didn't care if he died, but he was terrified that Quistis might. If
she died because of him, there could be no more forgiveness.

'Damn you, Quistis, for being so compassionate,' he thought, forcing
himself not to blatantly push her through the nearest shop door. 'Damn you.'



Xu was about to take a bite of her salad when Carbuncle screamed in the
back of her mind. Her fork dropped to the table as her hands clasped onto her
head in a reflexive action.

"Something's wrong," she gasped once the pain receded. She shoved back
her chair and broke out into a run to find the source of what upset Carbuncle.

Kei was left sitting at the table with a puzzled look to her. She threw a
couple crumpled up bills on the table and took off after Xu, leaving their bags
behind for the time being. Xu was the faster of the two of them, thus Kei
slowly lost sight of her cousin through the crowd.



The attack came faster than Enju had expected.

And all too quickly he realized he wasn't the sole target.

The man on the bench calmly folded up his newspaper, stood, and then drew
out from the folds of his jacket an array of small throwing knifes. Without
missing a step, he launched three of them straight at Enju's face.

The kinzoku-sensu was in Enju's left hand before Quistis knew he had it,
deflecting the barrage, his right arm still draped over her shoulders. He spun
around, using the momentum to send his metal fan spinning lop-sidedly across
the street. The first Blood Soul leading the charge found the fan's sharpened
blades extended, and then found his throat torn out as it sailed past him. The
man let out a stunned gurgle and, still trying to run, tumbled forward onto the
street.

Enju's head constantly moved.

He was used to covering his own back. That was easy enough, but now he
had to cover Quistis' back too. She had never fought against these sorts of
people. They would be merciless in their techniques.

Spinning around and keeping himself not a step from a startled Quistis,
who could barely keep up with his movements, Enju unclipped his second fan and
readied to meet the next charging Blood Soul.

Suddenly he caught sight of the knife thrower lobbing something straight
for Quistis' head. There seemed to chance she would be able to dodge it in
time. In his mind's eye, there was a flash of rage and terror as Enju saw her
lying dead on the street, her blood dripping onto the cobblestone and staining
his hands.

"No!" he shouted.

Enju's left arm snaked out in front of her face, and the knife blade sank
into his flesh with a sickening sound. Enju swore through his teeth as he felt
it, but there was little else he could do. That moment where his body jerked
but remained motionless was all the Blood Souls required; another throwing
knife buried itself between Enju's shoulder blades, causing him to stumble
forward.

Quistis was frantically trying to free her rante, but Enju was draping
himself over her, making the attempt virtually impossible as he pushed her
sideways. And then she saw what was happening as he drove her towards a place
where they might be able to take cover.

Another knife made an impossible arc through the air and slammed into the
back of his left calf muscle, and Enju nearly took them both down as he
stumbled. Quistis reached out to pull the one blade from his arm.

"Don't," he hissed, still driving her to safety, using his own body as a
shield to protect her. He could feel the poison flowing through his body,
making each limb slowly shut down. "Blood knives."

Quistis had only read about them. They were knives that had an appetite
for warm blood and sought it out with increasing thirst. Every taste they got
made the knives hungry for more. Not only could the knives home in on a
victim, their tips were usually poisoned to increase their lethality.

She could see the blade in his arm twitch like it was alive, trying to
burrow deeper. If she pulled it out, the knife would just jump out of her hands
and find a new part of Enju's body to sink into. But she had to do something.
The knives would finally hit true if more were thrown, never mind the blood he
was losing or the poison coursing through his veins!

In his mind, Enju was cursing the fact that Quistis was here. His fear of
losing her became focused on the fact that if he didn't have to watch out for
her, he could have dodged the blood knives before they had a chance to sense
the warmth of his blood and home in.

But he wouldn't let it end here.

The future would not be what Silence had seen.

Enju suddenly gave a fierce shove, sending Quistis tumbling in behind the
shadow of a potted tree. "I won't let them have you!" he snarled, whirling back
to the attackers. He seemed wildly ignorant of the knives that punctured his
chest and thigh. One of the charging Blood Souls was upon him, but Enju still
found himself in control of his right arm.

The attacker's chest spilled open as the kinzoku-sensu's blades tore
apart bone and skin, the man crashing to the ground in a bloodied pool. Enju
was able to smile for a moment in knowing that now it was only two against one.

Quistis would not die today.

He refused to let it happen.

Suddenly his life meant nothing once more, but it was not the same apathy
he once held. In life he would forever be haunted. But in death, there was a
chance to find peace, absolution. A maniacal smile was on his face as he
struggled to stand, glaring at his enemy. To die for Quistis would not be such
a horrible fate after all.

And then the one on the rooftops made his presence known, dropping from
above. Upon his right hand was a glove whose fingers had been given metallic
claws. The fingers were brought together to form a vicious edged beak that was
plunged into Enju's left shoulder, just beneath the collarbone.

Blood spurted out in a strange, crimson cloud.

Enju felt his body spin like a top as the Blood Soul effortlessly pulled
out the claws and bounced away to a safer distance. Enju crumpled in a heap.
His entire body was shaking, his vision going blurred. Why did he feel so hot?
Was this from the poison? He managed to make out the distorted form of the
knife thrower, who seemed preparing for another barrage.

This strike he couldn't block.

But he could feel himself dying anyways.

There was nothing more he could do. If Quistis died here, if Quistis died
now, then he had failed. And he would be damned forever.



Only a few seconds had passed since Enju had shoved Quistis behind a
surrogate shield. By the time he was killing the next attacker, she had rolled
onto her feet and pulled out her rante. Unimpeded by anyone, she spun it around
before snapping it forward. The strike was textbook perfect as the tip of the
rante dug into the throat of the knife thrower. His larynx was crushed,
causing blood to spill out from the gap under his jaw. Quistis didn't hear his
last gurgled breaths as she sought out the last target.



The afternoon crowd had made itself scarce after the first knife was
thrown. There was nothing in Xu's way to stop her headlong flight to the
scene. The SeeD paused only long enough to launch one of her sai at the man
wearing the savage-looking metal claws. His scream punctuated the sharpened
sai burrowing into his thigh.

Xu skidded to a halt over Enju's prone form and took up a guarded stance
with her remaining sai at the ready. There was no time for her to check to see
if he was dead or alive.



Quistis brought her rante around to strike at the last man standing. She
clipped him on the cheek before drawing the chained whip back into her hands.
Unexpectedly, she felt a shield of magic form around her. Carbuncle made
itself know by adding its protective measures.

The man with the metal claws suddenly cried out and dropped onto the
ground as a sai buried itself into his leg. But that didn't seem enough to stop
him; he immediately pulled out the sai and started to limp away.

Even with the wound he was moving fast. Quistis had seen him practically
bound across the rooftops and through the air, so this Blood Soul's agility
didn't surprise her all that much. But Quistis wasn't about to let him go
either, not after what they had done to Enju. She twisted the whip around and
then launched it after him.



The battle took no longer than a few heartbeats and Kei almost missed it.
She charged down the cobblestone roadway chasing both Quistis' thrown rante and
its intended target. It caught up with the man before she did and tangled up
around his legs. Stumbling, he fell to the ground hard and rolled several
times before coming to a halt. When he did, he found the tip of Kei's katana
under his chin.

"Move and you're dead," she said coolly.

He didn't so much as wet himself.



Enju seemed to be swimming in a puddle of his own blood as Quistis raced
to his side, dropping to her knees.

"Not such a bad thing," he mumbled. His voice was quiet, distanced, oddly
amused. He was delirious from the poison and blood loss.

Quistis could feel the tears streaming down her cheeks as she tried to
find a way to stop the bleeding. But he seemed to be bleeding from everywhere,
and then there was the poison to contend with.

Xu gave a quick appraisal of the situation. She hissed something in
Anshin, which resembled a phrase of disbelief.

"Why didn't you let me help you?" Quistis demanded amidst her sobs.

Enju managed a weakened smile. "I didn't want you to die." He convulsed,
more blood spilling out from his mouth. Xu and Quistis tried to hold him down
as he spasmed, seemingly trying to twist his body to a point where it would
tear itself apart.

"My hands are bloodied. I didn't want--" His eyes started to roll back
into his skull. "--you to... share..."

He lapsed into another convulsion, nearly biting his tongue off. From
there, he didn't say anything more. He was lucky he was able to breathe.



The local authorities arrived just in time to miss all the action. They
were quick to further neutralize the assailant that was still living. The
medics arrived on the heels of the police. Xu couldn't allow them to treat
Enju. They'd have to strip him down to do that and then his identity would be
revealed.

"Stop!" She placed a restraining hand on the arm of one of the medics.

"We need to get the bleeding under control before we can move him. I
know you SeeDs like to think that you're super humans, but don't be a fool.
Stand back and let us do what we're trained to do," the medic wrenched his arm
free of her grasp.

Xu pushed him away. "He has a condition that prevents traditional
treatment. The only doctor that can help him is at the Garden," she explained
hastily.

The medic became increasingly frustrated with her refusal of medical
treatment. Admittedly, Enju didn't look that great. She briefly considered
the repercussions of allowing them to treat Enju. If he was found out, it
would create a great many headaches not only for him, but for the Garden as
well. Once it was uncovered that they were knowingly harboring a wanted
murderer Garden's reputation would be destroyed. No, even if it did cost him
his life, she couldn't allow his secret to be discovered.

"We'll keep him alive with magic until he can be properly treated. If
you want to help us, give us a ride back to the Garden," she said in a tone
that was calmer than she felt. Her adrenaline was still racing after the
battle. Understandable since the danger hadn't yet passed.

The medic's mouth hung open. "You're out of your mind!"

"Do it!" Xu ordered with authority that she didn't have. It was enough
to snap the stunned medic into action. He had Enju transferred to a stretcher
and placed in an awaiting ambulance.

Xu climbed into the back, along with Kei and Quistis. The police had
plenty of questions, but no one was willing to stick around and answer them.
The police would undoubtedly be in contact with the Garden by this evening to
raise hell with Cid.

Quistis and Kei took turns casting Curagas on Enju. The poison was a
strong one and not even an Esuna spell had been able to purge his body. Any
healing they did was undone in a matter of minutes. It was a struggle to cast
faster than the poison acted.

Xu watched them work, but didn't join in on the effort. The eugenics
that prevented Enju from ever being a strong spell caster also prevented spells
from having much effect on him. Quistis was a naturally strong magic user,
especially after coming into her own with her Blue Magic. Kei's skill came
after much practice. Of the three of them, Xu was the weakest caster. A spell
cast by her on Enju would have little to no effect on him.

Doctor Kadowaki was waiting for their arrival. The medics had radioed
ahead to give her a heads up. She was already prepared to perform emergency
surgery on him as soon as they got him off the stretcher and onto the operating
table. Everyone except Kadowaki and Kei (who was drafted into continued spell
casting while she stabilized him) was ejected from the Infirmary. There would
be no witnesses to the goings on within.



Xu remained behind to guard the door to the Infirmary. There really was
no reason for her to do so; the lock worked just fine. But it made *her* feel
better to be doing something 'helpful'.

Quistis wished to stay with her, but the Headmaster asked her to join him
up in his office. She'd only been there a handful of times in the past. At
his invitation she took a seat on one of the couches along the side of the
room. He came from around his desk to sit next to her.

Neither of them said anything for the longest time. The only thing on
her mind was wondering if Enju would survive. She didn't hold any false hopes,
fully realizing how grave his situation truly was. He was lucky to have lasted
the battle and would be doubly so if he came out of this alive.

Her thoughts were so focused on Enju that she didn't notice Cid studying
her profile intently. Slowly she turned her head to face him and met his
intense eyes.

"How do you feel?" He asked gently.

"I'm worried about Enju," she answered honestly.

Ruefully he shook his head. "That's not what I meant." He took her
hands up in his and gave them a firm squeeze. "You took a human life today.
How do you feel?"

"Oh..." She hadn't thought about it much. There were so many other
things foremost in her mind that remorse and grief had yet to settle in. She
could understand why he was asking how she felt, but there really wasn't much
to say. "They tried to kill Enju and me. I don't feel anything but anger at
them for their attack on us."

"Is that all?"

She shrugged. "You always warned us that the day would come when we
might have to take another person's life. My time simply came before many
other's."

Cid frowned slightly, but accepted her answer. His most adept student
had done something not even Xu had. It was a shame that it had to happen this
soon. That she wasn't even a SeeD yet. It wasn't as simple as she made it out
to be. Once the excitement of recent events has passed, then she may regret
her actions. That's when he needed to be available to support her.

He wouldn't lose Quistis when she was so close to graduating.



Enju woke up groggily and twitched his nose at the antiseptic smell.
Glancing up at the window indicated it was night. Without any lights on, the
entire room was pitched in darkness.

"Oh, not here again," he muttered. Before he had come to Balamb, he'd
never even seen an underground doctor's office. Now it felt like he was getting
treated every other week. "I hate this damn place."

From the shadows at his bedside a person leaned over and turned on a dim
light. Xu was dressed as casually as if they had been sparring. She looked
pale and drawn, but had a small smile on her face.

"In case you're wondering, I'm alive." He felt aching pain in every
muscle in his body. There was no way he could be dead and suffering this much.
Even talking had to be done in a hushed voice, or else his brain started to
pound. "I must admit this comes as somewhat of a surprise to me."

"Thanks to Quistis," Xu clarified. "She was the one who saved your life.
After you went down, she beat back the Blood Souls until Kei and I arrived --
including killing one of them."

Enju visibly winced, though his movements and expressions were slow in
forming. He turned his head away from Xu so that she couldn't see the sadness
in his eyes. Now his hope, his innocence, was as tainted as he was. It was
his fault that Quistis had to kill another. If he'd left when Talasu first
warned him about the danger, this would have never happened.

Damn it all, this time he knew he could only blame himself.

"Her hands are stained like mine," he whispered harshly. "I've become a
demon and corrupted her."

"The day would have come eventually."

He glanced over at her sharply. "How can you say that? You've always
been her staunchest defender."

Xu shrugged slightly. "I'm also a realist."

She left him to his thoughts for a few moments before continuing. "As
you likely know, your attackers were all wanted men. Cid is gently pressuring
the Balamb officials not to ask too many questions -- simply take their catch
and go. Regardless of what he does, they're going to be here tomorrow to
interview those who participated..."

She paused and stared out the window, refusing to meet his eyes. "I
suggest you go before they get here. This place is no longer safe for you."

He didn't say anything. Instead he tried to sit up only to fall back to
the mattress. Wincing with pain he grumbled, "Shit, I don't think I've felt
this much pain since... Since... Since this was done." He lifted up an arm.

"The tattoos or the eugenics?"

"Between the eugenics, tattoos, and knives I can't decide which hurts the
most. You have some experience in these things. What do you think?" He asked
wryly.

Xu gave his question some careful thought before answering. "I think
losing the one you love hurts the most."

He didn't answer right away. Her comment struck home for him. "I never
had to worry about that; I haven't lost anyone I cared for... but today I came
close. If I had died out there, and Quistis survived, I wouldn't have minded. I
think I understand a little of how you feel, Xu."

"The upcoming weeks, months, years even, won't be easy ones."

"No need to tell me that; I've done this before," he concurred. "I've
changed lives like they were shirts, but this life I want to keep... but it's
what has to be done."

Regretfully, Xu had to agree. "I've already packed your bags for you.
They're in your room ready for when you decide to go."

He nuzzled his head back into his pillow. "It's past curfew. I assume
the Faculty will stop me if they spot me wandering the Garden."

Xu chuckled lightly. "Honestly, when was the last time a guard stopped
you when you didn't want to be stopped?"

He had to grin at that. The point was well taken. The Faculty couldn't
prevent him from leaving if he was that bent on going. He just had to build up
the resolve to go.

Standing up from the stool she was seated on Xu placed a hand gently on
his shoulder. "It's been good knowing you, Enju."

He reached up and gave it a squeeze. He couldn't even find the courage
to say, "And you as well, Mistress."

He didn't want to leave, but he had to soon. Right now he just wanted the
illusion to live on a little more.

Xu left the Infirmary then. She was tired enough that she could have
fallen asleep where she stood, but there was one more stop she had to make
before she crawled into bed. The lift took her up to the third floor office of
the Headmaster. Despite the late hour, he was still awake and waiting for her
arrival.

"Will he be able to leave tonight?" The Headmaster asked after she was
comfortably seated on the couch Quistis had occupied earlier in the day.

"He'll find a way. I suspect the scare of almost losing Quistis shook
him more than he's willing to admit. He's not one to repeat his mistakes." Xu
leaned her head against the back of the couch wearily. It'd been too long of a
day.

"You've done your fair share of heroics today. I want you to rest
tomorrow. If I see you in uniform I'll have you escorted to the Infirmary
where you'll be confined to bed," Cid waggled a finger at her.

Xu closed her eyes; her resistance to the call of sleep failing. "I'm
all right. I just need a good night's rest."

She didn't see Cid's frown. "You gave more blood than you should have.
If you and Enju hadn't turned out to be such a good match..."

Xu's lips curled up into a weak smile. "We'll both live, that's what
matters."



His bags were a hell of a lot heavier than he remembered them being, Enju
grumbled to himself darkly as he moved quietly through the vacant hallways.
Once he found a safe place to hide out for a few days he planned on sleeping
until every last ounce of weariness was relieved. The poison weakened him
entirely too much. Of course, Kadowaki was amazed that he could have taken
over a dozen hits and survived at all. He really did have Quistis and the
others to thank for it.

Enju tried to burn every last image of Balamb Garden to memory with each
step he took. Every sound and scent, every door and breezeway. This was what he
wanted to take with him when he disappeared. In a strange nostalgic way, he
could hear the distant echoes of cadets calling out to each other, of lectures
from the Faculty, and the sounds of hand to hand combat in the Training Centre.

This life was no longer his own.

But the memories were still his to keep.

Idly, he wondered what new name awaited him; he'd have to think of one
soon enough. Transportation had already been arranged off Balamb, though not
even Cid knew about it. Shortly Enju would be no more. A new person would be
left in the cadet's wake. For now even Enju wasn't sure what that person would
be like.

He was just outside of the final gate when a shadow separated itself from
the ones surrounding it. "You just had to leave with a bang, didn't you?" Kei
challenged.

Enju paused in his retreat to answer her. "Technically speaking, there
were no guns involved." He had to laugh as Kei gave another exasperated groan.
Even still, this was good-bye for them too, and so his laugh lacked its usual
edge. "For what it's worth, Kei," he said, adjusting the positioning of a
shoulder strap for one of his bags. "You'd have made a terrific assassin if you
weren't already a SeeD. Maybe we'll see each other again some day."

Kei managed a smile. "Just don't give me a reason to kick your ass the
next time we meet, okay?"

He nodded, and her phrasing caused him to smirk. Speaking of reasons,
he'd left his mark in the Training Center before departing. A reminder that he
had once been someone named Enju, and that Enju had once stayed here for a
short, but treasured duration of time. He wondered how long it would take
someone to find the 'ENJU WAS HERE' he etched into one of the trees.

"Take care of Quistis while I'm away?"

"I'll guard her with my life," Kei agreed.

In this world of millions of people, each one was different. Some held
more similarities than others did, and sometimes two people were complete
opposites. Despite this, at times it was possible to find a common ground
between people who were otherwise at odds.

Even if they were Spirits, Quistis was the bond that drew them together.



The matter with the Balamb authorities was neatly brushed under the rug
once the obligatory interviews were conducted. Quistis didn't know what Cid
told them about Enju's disappearance. It wasn't something for her to worry
about and so she didn't.

A few days after he left she received a package in the mail. She was used
to getting the occasional letter from the twins, LeVar, Jessie and once in a
while Skye if they were on assignment. The package was a surprise, especially
since the sender wasn't indicated on it, nor was there a return address.

Gingerly she opened it. Inside was the board game she and Kei played
together. There was no note inside, but she didn't need one to know whom it
was from. It was Enju's way of fulfilling his promise to her.

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