Gankutsuou Fan Fiction ❯ Gankutsuou Reborn ❯ Do You Love Me? ( Chapter 11 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
GANKUTSUOU REBORN
© September 30, 2005 By Rory V. Pascual


CHAPTER ELEVEN: Do You Love Me?

"DAMN IT!"

Albert shook with rage, his fist having created a hole through the plaster of the wall. The doctor had long gone, but what the man had told him remained etched inside his mind.

"He was raped, Your Excellency, and the men who had done this to him had been most brutal," the doctor had revealed to him with much reluctance. "I am amazed that he managed to survive what was done to him. Any damage, both external and internal, is quickly healing. However, he still has to recover from the blood loss. I cannot speak for his mind though. It is rare for one to escape from such a devastating trauma unscathed. Outwardly, he seems quite calm and composed, but inside… Your Excellency, this is going to be difficult, but he would need you to get through this. He obviously cares a great deal about you. I hope you feel the same way about him, so that you could help him heal."

"But what am I going to do?" Albert cried, confused and frustrated. "What? How could I help Etienne when I couldn't…"

"You've helped me a lot more than you think, Albert."

Whirling, he beheld Eugenie standing behind him.

"After Andrea…" the pianist's voice faltered at that painful memory. "I thought I wouldn't survive. What frightened me the most was that I would be wedded to that monster. But you came. Just by your mere presence, you made me feel that I would be saved. Even with Andrea beside me, I lost all fear."

"But Eugenie…I wasn't there to stop him when he…"

"I don't blame you for that. How could you have known what Andrea was going to do to me? It was all coincidence. Besides, I know, that if you had been there at that moment, you would've protected me."

Eugenie clasped Albert's hand. "I deeply regret that things did not work out for us. Even if we had gotten married, I doubt if our union would've been a happy one. We're good friends, yes, but we were never in love with each other. You were in love with someone else."

Albert's cheeks colored at that last.

The pianist looked at her former fiancé seriously. "That young man up there is deeply in love with you. However, with the terrible things that had been done to him, he is very afraid that he might lose you. If you love him, Albert, go to him right now. You don't have to say anything. Just be there. He would know, just as I had."

Albert could only gape back at Eugenie, any words he wanted to say having deserted him.

~~~~~~~~~~

Haydee sat in a chair at Etienne's bedside, with Baptistin and Bertuccio standing behind her. She offered a spoonful of soup to the singer, but Etienne slowly shook his head. His long, dark hair hid his face from their view.

"Oh, Etienne, please! You must eat something!" the princess exclaimed, truly concerned.

"The Princess is right," Baptistin agreed wholeheartedly. "You need to eat if you're to heal faster. Perhaps it is just nerves. I could get you a shot of brandy if you like."

Again, the singer shook his head. They were dismayed to see the tear that dripped down his chin.

Bertuccio took the robe hanging at the back of a chair and draped it over Etienne's shoulders. "You have nothing more to fear, Etienne. You're among friends."

"Am I…among friends, that is? Would I still be welcome among you?" The Nightingale's hands on his lap closed into shaking fists. "I'm…sorry," he mumbled hoarsely.

Haydee laid her hand over one fist. "Why should you say that? You're our friend, Etienne. And why are you apologizing to us for? You've done nothing wrong."

"Don't say that! You don't know anything!"

All were taken aback by that bitter cry.

"Etienne, calm down! Please!" Haydee begged the distraught singer. "Why don't you tell us what's troubling you?"

At that query, Etienne faced them at last. The princess drew her hand back in an instant as though she had been burned. Both Bertuccio and Baptistin gasped in shock. Gazing at them through the loops and curls of those pink marks on his brow were the glowing eyes of Gankutsuou.

"Oh my God!" Baptistin blurted out, unsure whether to flee the bedchamber or not. He was already close to picking up Haydee and running out with her.

What stopped him was the sight of Bertuccio dropping down to one knee to pay obeisance to his master. "My Lord!"

Haydee herself burst into tears of joy. "Even if it were impossible, I always prayed that you would come back. Oh, Count!" She threw herself into Gankutsuou's embrace.

"Please! Everyone!" Gankutsuou gestured to them to calm down, while he tenderly patted Haydee's head. "Etienne slumbers inside me. If he senses my distress, he is sure to wake up. I…I only wanted to speak with you again."

"But how?" Baptistin stammered, unable to find the right words to phrase his questions correctly. "We saw you die!"

"I am immortal, in case you've forgotten, Baptistin."

"But…this form you are wearing…doesn't this belong to Edmond Dantes?"

The entity shook his head. "Yes…and no. While I possess his features, I am not he. It is a very complicated thing for me to explain."

Haydee was seized by sudden fear as she looked up into that youthful face. "Why did you come back? Don't tell us that you still seek revenge. If you are, I will do everything in my power to stop you this time. People are still hurting over what you've done. Surely you yourself feel the pain you've caused those you once loved and cared for."

"You speak to me as though I were still Edmond Dantes. Yes, perhaps he has become a permanent part of me. But I did not return to exact revenge." Breathing in deeply, Gankutsuou confessed, "The reason why I came back is because Edmond had a wish before he died, a wish that he and I shared. I returned to see that wish fulfilled, but I never thought that things would turn out this way!"

Bertuccio stood up and went around the bed, sitting on the other side. "Gankutsuou, you know that things rarely work out the way we want them to. The events of that summer seven years ago taught us that."

"But not like this! Our wish was simple – to live again, to live a peaceful, happy life, and to…" The entity stopped himself before he could reveal more. "Instead, what we got was…hardship, violence and rape. I know that I have committed so many sins, but this…punishment…is too much to bear. If God wanted to punish me, he should've just taken my soul and sent me straight me to Hell. He never should've involved an innocent like Etienne!"

It dawned on Bertuccio what Gankutsuou was struggling to say. "It was you whom Benedetto and his men had raped. Rather than let Etienne suffer through it, you drove his consciousness into deep sleep and took the full brunt of the abuse."

As the entity nodded, Haydee gave him a soothing embrace. "My beloved Count! It tears my heart to know that you had suffered my mother's fate! I feared you, true, but my heart was telling me that you're not evil. I curse the gods for causing you unending suffering!"

Gankutsuou's face was wet with his tears as he gazed at his trusted confidantes. "What am I going to do? I am nothing but damaged goods! How could Albert love us, after what was done…"

Despite the entity's anguish, Baptistin found himself smiling. "How could Albert love us?" Gankutsuou had said. Not Etienne. Us.

"I think you underestimate Albert, Gankutsuou," he commented, catching the entity's attention. "Before Albert had known of your existence inside Edmond Dantes, he had fallen in love with the both of you as the Count of Monte Cristo. Your hearts beat as one for him. If you didn't, you would never have come to his aid many times. Have you forgotten that night when Monsieur Villefort had tried to kill you? You and Edmond acted as one to save Albert. You cannot deny it. Those marks appeared on your forehead."

"But that was different, Baptistin," Gankutsuou argued. "I was a…whole…man then. They've…broken me."

"Then, Albert shall help you pick up the pieces until you are complete once more." Haydee brushed away Gankutsuou's tears with her hands. "Have no doubt. Albert loves you."

The entity was about to say more when there was a tentative knock on the door. Then, Albert called from outside, "May I come in?"

"Hold on a second, Albert!" Baptistin answered back in haste, seeing the panic in Gankutsuou's eyes.

To add to the entity's trepidation, he could feel Etienne begin to stir.

With odd-colored eyes begging in earnest, Gankutsuou cried, "Please don't tell Albert about me!"

Bertuccio smiled at him reassuringly. "We told you before we shall follow you forever. This is not a difficult request you ask. However, Albert will notice sooner or later. You should consider what you're going to say to him when that time comes."

Gankutsuou beamed at his three most trusted friends. "Thank you so much. You have no idea how much I've missed speaking to all of you like this."

"We'll have a lot of time to talk like this," Haydee promised him. "Just call if you need us."

:Gankutsuou…: Etienne's sleepy mind voice asked. :Is something wrong?:

:No, Etienne. I was just talking to Princess Haydee, Bertuccio and Baptistin. Albert's outside.:

:Albert? No, Gankutsuou! We can't!:

But it was too late. Baptistin had already opened the door, letting Albert inside.

Turning back to the singer one last time, Haydee thought she could see the two presences within those mismatched eyes looking back at her with fear and hesitation. Bowing graciously, she said, "We shall leave you two alone now."

When the door finally closed, a heavy silence seemed to have fallen upon them. Feeling suddenly uncomfortable, Etienne pulled the robe close over his upper body. That movement caused Albert to notice the tattoos on the back of his hands for the first time.

Albert's heart thudded rapidly in his breast. "Etienne…those tattoos…I never noticed them before."

The singer was taken off-guard by that query. "These?" he asked, looking at his hands. "I've always had them. They run up my arms down to my back. Hideous, aren't they? That's why I always wear long-sleeved shirts and gloves."

Albert went towards the Nightingale. As he sat down, he took Etienne's hands in his grasp before they could be pulled away, and kissed the circle design in the middle. "Actually, I think they look quite exotic."

"Stop it, Albert!" Etienne cried, jerking his hands back. "You don't have to pretend!"

" 'Pretend'?" A frown creased Albert's brow at that one word.

Neither Etienne nor Gankutsuou had the courage to look into the other man's face. "Let us not kid ourselves any longer. Things have changed between us. You are a Parisian ambassador while I am a whore, and a damaged one at that. It won't do your reputation well to associate with someone like me."

"What're you saying?"

"Let's end this, Albert. What could've been between us…it was all just a dream." Etienne's eyes clouded with tears as he wistfully smiled. "It was a real nice dream. I'm sorry that it's all over."

The singer gasped as a heavy palm struck his cheek. Etienne cupped his aching face and looked at the other man. Albert was shaking all over, struggling to rein in his anger.

"Is that how little you think of me?" Albert asked in disbelief. "Do you have any idea how worried I was for you? Can't you imagine the guilt that's tearing my heart to shreds that I had not been able to stop Benedetto from violating you? It wasn't a dream, Etienne! It was a nightmare!"

"That's exactly what I mean! Albert, we cannot be together! I do not want to cause you any more pain!"

"I'm the one who's going to decide what's good for me or not! Not you!" Albert's hands tightened around Etienne's shoulders. "I told you this before. I am not letting you leave me!" Fearing that he might hurt the Nightingale again in this distraught state, he let him go. Smiling sadly, Albert suggested, "Get some sleep, Etienne. It's been very rough for you. We'll talk about this tomorrow."

:Albert…: That name was like a growing ember inside the fragile heart that Etienne and Gankutsuou shared. As Albert was about to walk away, they both acted as one, grabbing his hand.

"Do you…do you love me, Albert?" the singer and entity dared to ask, their voice trembling.

Tears filled Albert's sky blue eyes as he granted his precious Nightingale a look of pure longing. "Isn't it obvious, Etienne?"

"Then, show me!" Etienne pulled Albert's hand inside his shirt, letting him feel his bare skin. Beneath, his heart pounded like a jackhammer. "Make me yours, Albert! Possess me utterly!"

"Etienne, I can't! You're not completely healed yet!"

Albert blushed a deep scarlet when the singer lowered his trembling fingertips to the region between his legs.

"Show me, Albert. Please!" Etienne's mismatched eyes glowed with love and desire. "Show me that it doesn't have to hurt!"

~~~~~~~~~~~

"You are so warm," Etienne purred as he pulled Albert back into his embrace when his lover eased away for a moment to catch his breath after the deep kiss they had shared.

It was not that he was hot, mused Albert, although admittedly he was steaming with desire for the sensual creature in his arms. The fact was that Etienne was so cold, almost like a corpse. It was just as cold as the Count's hand that very first time they had shook hands. That, and the elaborate tattoos on his body. The only thing that convinced Albert that this young man could not be the Count were the circlets of thorns that were painted around his neck, wrists and ankles. The Count never had such adornments.

"Don't worry," Albert nipped at Etienne's throat, creating a wine red kiss mark. "I'll warm you up pretty quickly."

Like a man thirsty for water, he licked, lapped and nibbled his way down the singer's body, being careful to avoid his wounds. To his delight and surprise, with every touch of his lips, that blue skin seemed to tinge for a brief moment with a rich brown color. At first, he thought it was a trick of the flickering lamplight outside their bedroom window. But with every kiss, every nip, indeed, the blue turned into normal skin tone. His bright eyes twinkling with mischief and lasciviousness as they focused upon the blue-colored disc on the Nightingale's breast, he tried a little experiment.

Etienne whimpered, his body quivering, as Albert nipped on that tiny nub with his teeth, while he tweaked the other to tautness with his fingertips. Not satisfied with this play, he drew the nipple between his lips, suckling upon it deeply and hard. Already, with his wet tongue, he could feel the nub hardening into a point. As he drew away for a moment to lay his chin on the singer's sternum, he was amazed to see that sweet teat had turned into a rosy hue.

"What are you looking at?" Etienne murmured huskily as he peered down at his lover.

"Oh, it's nothing," Albert chuckled. "Next to my mother when I was a wee babe, you're the only one I want to do this to."

Saying this, he devoured the singer's other nipple, making Etienne arch his upper body up into that ravenous mouth.

"You are truly a pervert, Monsieur Herrera," the Nightingale gasped out, his breasts tingling with pleasure at that tender torture.

"You're the only one who calls me that, Monsieur Delacroix."

Giggling, Etienne pushed Albert off him. "Move over, you lecher, or else I'll end up spurting milk."

"That wouldn't be a bad idea."

Before Albert could even continue his little game, the singer turned him over until he was now on top. "So, as Monsieur Sigmund Freud would say, you are still in your oral stage. Let me show you just how you can make that devilish mouth of yours work."

Etienne's hair was like a flying cloak as he swooped down to capture Albert's erect member between his lips. Albert drew in a deep, shuddering breath as the singer swallowed his length to the root. It took tremendous effort on his part not to thrust hard into that talented mouth, but it was difficult. Etienne was determined to elicit surrender from him, with every constriction of his throat and every languid lick of his tongue.

It was Albert's turn to say "Move over," as he twisted his body around so that he was now looking up at the singer's erection. Etienne let out a luscious groan as his lover seized his member inside his mouth. Eagerness to taste the singer's juices made Albert quicken the suction until, whimpering softly, Etienne filled his throat with sweet nectar. Albert was close to coming as well, but a firm hand squeezed his length and bloated sacs at the base, stopping the release that he so craved.

"Are you torturing me, Etienne?" Albert growled, the sweat trickling down the length of his body.

In answer, Etienne lay back on the bed, with legs spread wide. With a caress of the distended veins of that burgeoning erection, he whispered, "I want to feel you come inside me."

Remembering the Nightingale's injuries made Albert hesitate. "I don't think I should do this. I don't want to hurt you."

"Just do it, Albert. Please!" Etienne drew Albert's length to his opening. "I need you."

Steeling himself for the task at hand, because it was a tremendous task to control his desire to plunder his lover's sweet, willing body, Albert pushed into that puckered office, feeling it tighten around his head. One minute thrust after another, he eased inside gradually, waiting with tortured patience for that channel to accommodate him.

"Oh, for heaven's sake!" Etienne gripped Albert's behind and, with one swift motion, pulled his lover inside his body. The move proved to be too hard and painful that Etienne hissed, his eyes tearing up. Albert blanched, feeling blood wetting both their thighs.

"Etienne!" Albert was about to draw back, but the singer held him in place.

Laughing, Etienne said, "Sorry if I frightened you. I was just too impatient for you."

Albert leaned down and kissed his lover on the lips, tasting each other's essence. "No more waiting, my love."

Then, Albert began to move, thrusting in and out of that tight channel until he could feel it acquiesce to his demands. After that, it was a smooth, gliding friction, as they moved their bodies – Albert to sheathe himself as much as he could inside the singer's heat while Etienne wanted to be filled completely. All pain disappeared, and their pace quickened into a driving, desperate rhythm that demanded a devastating conclusion. It was Etienne who came first with a luscious scream, their touching bellies becoming coated with his slick fluids. That cry sent Albert into a mind-blowing climax, and he spurted again and again into Etienne's depths until he was completely drained. With a shaky breath, Albert fell into the Nightingale's embrace.

For a long moment, they just lay arm in arm, relishing the warmth that exuded from each other's bodies.

"Are you all right, Etienne? I didn't hurt you, did I?"

"No, you didn't. It was a good hurt."

The Nightingale gazed up into his beloved's bright blue eyes. "I love you, Albert," Etienne whispered, as he pressed his growing erection against his lover's hip.

Albert felt himself harden instantly at that tempting gesture. "Etienne, you are insatiable, you know that?"

~~~~~~~~~~

Morning saw the two lovers still in bed. Etienne had laid his head on the hollow below Albert's ribcage, his luxurious ebony mane the only blanket covering their naked bodies.

"Etienne?" Albert murmured his lover's name, curling his fingers into those silken tresses. "May I ask you something?"

"Hmmm?"

"Ambassador DeQuervain back in Paris has given me a three month vacation, a reward of sorts for assisting in the apprehension of the members of the white slavery ring. I would like you to come with me."

:Paris?:

Etienne felt the fear emanating from Gankutsuou inside him. Why would the entity be so afraid of Paris?

Probably sensing his fear, Gankutsuou said, :Don't mind me, Etienne. If you want to go to Paris, it's all right.:

:I don't want to do anything that you wouldn't like, Gankutsuou,:
Etienne replied. :You know that.:

:But you want to be with Albert, right?:

:Yes, I do. But I won't go if you don't want to.:

:Actually…I do.:
Gankutsuou admitted with great reluctance. :Like you, I want to be with Albert as well.:

Etienne found himself becoming jealous. He could tell that the entity was also in love with Albert. True, they shared one body, but they were still separate beings.

:But we also share one heart, Etienne,: Gankutsuou noticed the singer's distress. :Could we not love him together?:

The Nightingale smiled at that query. :You're right, Gankutsuou. Why could we not love him as one?:

"Etienne?"

Both the singer and the entity gazed up to see the stricken expression on Albert's face. Their poor lover had already surmised, by their silence, that his invitation was going to be rejected.

As one heart and one soul, Etienne and Gankutsuou gave Albert a passionate embrace. "I will not be parted from you ever again. Yes, Albert. I will go with you to Paris."


* * * * * * * * * *