Gravitation Fan Fiction ❯ Disillusionment ❯ Weaknesses ( Chapter 4 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: soumanyon 
Hm...so it started with angst and then went to pure, OOC-Yuki fluff at the end. Now how did that happen?
Anime/Manga: Gravitation Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Romance | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 01.10.2004 | Pages: 2 | Words: 2.4K | Visits: 645 | Status: Work In Progress
Hm...so it started with angst and then went to pure, OOC-Yuki fluff at the end. Now how did that happen?
Anime/Manga: Gravitation Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Romance | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 01.10.2004 | Pages: 2 | Words: 2.4K | Visits: 645 | Status: Work In Progress
Disclaimer: Gravi isn't mine. It belongs to the great, the wonderful, Maki Murakami. I just borrow her characters for a while to torture. ^_~
Warning: a little lime content towards the end of the chapter. Nothing that bad unless you're really squirmy. It's very mild lime, nothing beyond PG-13. Anyway, enough babbling, on with the fic.
btw, I'm not too happy with this chapter. >.< It didn't really turn out the way I wanted it to, so I hope I don't disappoint my readers too much. Gomen nasai, minna!
Disillusionment
Chapter 4-Weaknesses
“I…I went to Hiro’s house.” Shuichi murmured, eyes on the ground. Suddenly he looked up and grinned at Yuki, attempting to act normal.
Yuki was silent as he stared at Shuichi, who was studying the carpet again. After a few moments of silence, Shuichi cautiously looked up at the blond through his magenta bangs.
Yuki met his violet eyes instantly. The novelist’s hard gold glare seemed to pierce right through the lavender hues.
“Bullshit.” Yuki said calmly, eyes closed now so neither his golden eyes nor his voice could betray any of the emotion he was feeling, or should be feeling. Because strangely, he wasn’t really feeling anything. It was more as if everything had suddenly became muted. Colors began to dim and there was a rushing sound in Yuki’s ears, like what a person hears while underwater. It was a loud absence of sound.
Shuichi’s grin faded as Yuki stared into his eyes. His palms were suddenly moist and he stuck his hands in his pocket to dry them off.
At the simple word, Shuichi flinched. Somehow Yuki knew he hadn’t been at Hiro’s house. And what was even worse, Shuichi had lied. He had lied to Yuki. And Yuki knew it.
Shuichi felt as if he wanted to break down and cling to Yuki and apologize repeatedly, but instead he somehow managed to stay rooted in one spot. But he trembled, not sure what Yuki was going to do next. He was sure Yuki would never hurt him, but the blond’s sharp barbs struck so much deeper than any slap or punch ever could.
“I’m willing to give you another chance.” Yuki said suddenly, eyes still closed, “Tell me, truthfully, where you were last night.”
This time Shuichi bit his lip even harder in the unbearable silence after Yuki’s question. A single drop of blood seeped out of his lip but it went unacknowledged. For some insane reason, Shuichi felt an inexplicable fear of telling Yuki now.
A small, still logical corner of his mind told him that what he did wasn’t that bad, or at least it wasn’t as bad as he was making it seem. But that part of his mind was overwhelmed by the sheer wave of panic the rest of him felt.
He couldn’t tell Yuki!
“I…” Shuichi’s voice came out in a shuddering whisper as Yuki opened his eyes once again to focus his golden gaze on his lover, who cringed under the silent interrogation. His violet eyes gleamed with moisture, but he shut them, unwilling to cry right now.
“…I can’t…” the rest of the statement came out in a mumble,
“What?” Yuki asked, waiting for Shuichi to speak up. He now stood up and towered over the pink-haired boy, who whimpered and tried to take a step back. Yuki’s hands came up in a flash and grabbed Shuichi’s shaking shoulders, keeping the boy where he was.
Shuichi now looked pathetically fragile and his skin seemed too pale, but Yuki was blinded by the need to know. The need for an explanation other than the one his mind was too willing to provide. A sort of desperation drove him to shake his lover harshly by the shoulders,
“Tell me!” he yelled as Shuichi stared up at him, fear evident in wide violet eyes. Suddenly, Shuichi began to shake his head violently, his strawberry colored hair flying.
“I can’t! I can’t tell you!” he screamed and his hands, which had been hanging at his sides, were now slapping and prying at Yuki’s arms and hands, trying futilely to make the blond let go of him, “Let me go! No! I can’t tell you! Let me go!”
A slap echoed through the apartment.
Shuichi fell to the ground quietly, making only a small thump as he fell to his knees, then onto the floor, still managing to stay sitting even if he was a bit slumped over and it was only his quivering arm which propped him up.
His other hand was covering the red mark, which was rapidly appearing on the boy’s pale, creamy skin. His whole right side of his face was now bright red. There would be an ugly bruise there. But the pain didn’t register in Shuichi’s mind because of how his face was numbing and also because of shock. Yuki…had slapped him.
Meanwhile, said blond stared at his red hand intently, then at the boy who was just barely still sitting on the ground. In a detached way, he was horrified with himself with slapping the boy, but the main thought on his mind now was of panic. Shuichi would leave him. It had been a secret fear of Yuki’s for…a long time now. He had quickly grown attached to his lover and somehow fallen in love with the little brat.
Anyway, he knew that Shuichi deserved to be treated better than what Yuki Eiri could offer him and every day, every time he had seen the hurt in those violet eyes after a meaningless insult slipped out, he had been afraid he would wake up one day and find Shuichi Shindou gone from his life. And that would kill him.
After what had happened yesterday and Shuichi actually leaving him for a night…and now this, when Shuichi had obviously been trying to reconcile with a fancy box of his favorite sweets…well, he knew it would happen sometime. Better to get it over with quickly.
“I’ll pack your bags for you. You can come get them whenever you want.” Yuki calmly stated, walking over to the coffee table to pick up the cigarettes he had dropped earlier.
Sticking one of the thin white sticks in between his lips, Yuki lit it and inhaled deeply, needing the anesthetizing drugs the cigarette offered. Running a hand through his hair, the novelist began to walk towards the bedroom, intent on starting the packing right away. If Shuichi was going to be gone from his life, then he wanted all reminders of him gone as soon as possible. Maybe that would make this separation easier.
But suddenly Yuki stopped as he felt a tug on his pants leg. Looking down, he saw Shuichi’s slender hand grabbing onto it,
“Don’t make me leave, onegai.” Shuichi whimpered, large lavender eyes luminous with unshed tears. For a moment, Yuki was completely confused, then realized that the brat was probably worried about finding a place to stay,
“You have enough money, you can rent your own apartment. Or stay at Hiro’s.” he said coldly, trying to take a step towards the bedroom.
“No, Yuki, I wanna stay.” Shuichi said, scooting forward to grab Yuki’s hand instead of his leg, “Please Yuki, please don’t make me go. I wanna stay here with you.”
‘He…doesn’t want to leave?’ Yuki thought, “…”
In the silence, the pink-haired vocalist’s tears began to fall and, desperate, he decided to tell Yuki,
“I…I went to the park…” Shuichi’s head was now bowed in shame. He knew that Yuki would berate him endlessly about it, but that was better than his lover throwing him out.
Stunned silence.
“But…Sakuma, Tohma, Tatsuha?” Yuki asked, finally revealing why he had been so furious when Shuichi had refused to tell him where he had been the previous night.
Shuichi blinked blankly up at Yuki, then flushed a brilliant red with indignation and embarrassment,
“I’m not a village bicycle, Yuki!” he shouted, standing up and beginning to stomp towards the kitchen where he knew a certain pint of strawberry-vanilla swirl ice cream was waiting for him in the freezer. ‘How…how can Yuki even think that I’m like that?!’
But warm arms around his waist from behind stopped Shuichi. Yuki leaned his head down to Shuichi’s slender neck and began to place feather kisses on it, mumbling in between,
“Of course, you’re my private property.” Yuki murmured, while Shuichi shuddered at both the intimate contact and the possessiveness in the blond’s tone.
“Mhmm…” was all Shuichi managed to say as he turned his head slightly to give Yuki better access to his creamy skin, mentally thanking Ryuichi for picking out a shirt with such a low neckline. Lazily, Yuki’s mouth headed towards Shuichi’s, trailing butterfly kisses along the way.
Finally reaching the singer’s sensuous lips, Yuki began to kiss Shuichi gently, which was a first for the man. The number of gentle kisses he had given could be counted on one hand. Yuki’s lips covered Shuichi’s, then pulled away almost breaking contact before swooping back in again.
Hesitantly, Shuichi let his mouth slacken and it opened, allowing Yuki’s skillful tongue in. The blond was almost giddy with happiness inside, although of course it didn’t show. It was rare for Shuichi to be so bold during their kisses. Usually, Yuki had to give him a not so subtle reminder or two. There were even a few times towards the start of their relationship that Yuki had had to physically pry Shuichi’s mouth open.
The novelist’s lips curved up in a smirk at that. His young lover had come a long way during their time together. To think that before, he had been a clueless little virgin. Then again, it wasn’t as if it was very different now. Actually, that was one of the things that Yuki loved about Shuichi. Even after making love to Yuki countless times, the vocalist still blushed innocently whenever Yuki suggested anything.
The blond’s hands, which were on Shuichi’s stomach, now crept down to the hem of the black silk tank top and sneaked under it so the novelist could run his fingers over Shuichi’s smooth stomach.
Shuichi giggled into Yuki’s mouth, breaking away from the kiss and also taking a much-needed breath of air. Arching one light brown eyebrow, Yuki uncertainly ran his fingers over Shuichi’s stomach again.
A similar reaction to the first bubbled out from Shuichi, making the boy giggle even more. Yuki’s smirk widened until it could almost be called an evil grin. Tackling the boy mercilessly, Yuki soon had Shuichi pinned under him in tears from laughter,
“Ack! No, stop!” Shuichi screamed, trying to wriggle playfully from Yuki’s hold.
“How about we just stay like this.” Yuki suggested, whispering in a husky voice in Shuichi’s ear before attacking the boy’s midriff again.
Shuichi screeched, then a mischievous glint entered his violet eyes. Wrapping his arms around Yuki’s neck, he pulled the man’s hand near him and his tongue darted out and traced along the outside of Yuki’s ear. The novelist suddenly stiffened, and Shuichi rolled him to the side easily, leaping up and running towards the bedroom.
When Yuki recovered, he leapt up growling and ran after Shuichi. Closing and locking the bedroom door behind him, he walked to the bed, where Shuichi was lounging, eyes closed and arms behind his head, relaxed.
With a predatoral gleam in his gold eyes, Yuki stalked around the bed, eyeing Shuichi almost hungrily. When Shuichi opened one eye to look at what his lover was doing, he was pounced and pinned again. But his time he had no intention of getting up for quite a while. Yuki agreed.
~*~
A/N: Hm...so it started with angst and then went to pure, OOC-Yuki fluff at the end. Now how did that happen? It was originally going to be angsty beginning and end with a tiny bit of fluff in the middle. Hn. Blame the fluff-muse.
Keep those reviews coming! Sorry about no updates for...a long while now. I should be getting back on track, so expect more quicker updates. Hopefully.
My ye olde reply to goodly ye olde reviewers. Ye. ^_^; Nice, 7 reviews? Keep 'em coming!
tweetynumair: Judging by your username...are you by any chance a Tamora Pierce fan? Anyway, well, hope you liked this chapter!
frubbu: O.o; As in saying my fic is bad and I should finish it already or as in my fic is good and I should update more? Well...I'll try to finish it, lol.
ShadowWarriorJessica: Ooh cool! I'm glad I had the honor of being the first Gravi fic you read! Hehehe, but cliffhangers are just so much fun!
Zilca: hehe, lol, ^_^ What happens? Well...to put it bluntly...he got laid. ^_^; Sorry...just my messed up sense of humor rearing its ugly head.
T: Hm...will Shuichi be okay? Dunno yet, you'll have to wait and see! ^_~ Thanks for reviewing and glad ya like my fic so far!
Warning: a little lime content towards the end of the chapter. Nothing that bad unless you're really squirmy. It's very mild lime, nothing beyond PG-13. Anyway, enough babbling, on with the fic.
btw, I'm not too happy with this chapter. >.< It didn't really turn out the way I wanted it to, so I hope I don't disappoint my readers too much. Gomen nasai, minna!
Disillusionment
Chapter 4-Weaknesses
“I…I went to Hiro’s house.” Shuichi murmured, eyes on the ground. Suddenly he looked up and grinned at Yuki, attempting to act normal.
Yuki was silent as he stared at Shuichi, who was studying the carpet again. After a few moments of silence, Shuichi cautiously looked up at the blond through his magenta bangs.
Yuki met his violet eyes instantly. The novelist’s hard gold glare seemed to pierce right through the lavender hues.
“Bullshit.” Yuki said calmly, eyes closed now so neither his golden eyes nor his voice could betray any of the emotion he was feeling, or should be feeling. Because strangely, he wasn’t really feeling anything. It was more as if everything had suddenly became muted. Colors began to dim and there was a rushing sound in Yuki’s ears, like what a person hears while underwater. It was a loud absence of sound.
Shuichi’s grin faded as Yuki stared into his eyes. His palms were suddenly moist and he stuck his hands in his pocket to dry them off.
At the simple word, Shuichi flinched. Somehow Yuki knew he hadn’t been at Hiro’s house. And what was even worse, Shuichi had lied. He had lied to Yuki. And Yuki knew it.
Shuichi felt as if he wanted to break down and cling to Yuki and apologize repeatedly, but instead he somehow managed to stay rooted in one spot. But he trembled, not sure what Yuki was going to do next. He was sure Yuki would never hurt him, but the blond’s sharp barbs struck so much deeper than any slap or punch ever could.
“I’m willing to give you another chance.” Yuki said suddenly, eyes still closed, “Tell me, truthfully, where you were last night.”
This time Shuichi bit his lip even harder in the unbearable silence after Yuki’s question. A single drop of blood seeped out of his lip but it went unacknowledged. For some insane reason, Shuichi felt an inexplicable fear of telling Yuki now.
A small, still logical corner of his mind told him that what he did wasn’t that bad, or at least it wasn’t as bad as he was making it seem. But that part of his mind was overwhelmed by the sheer wave of panic the rest of him felt.
He couldn’t tell Yuki!
“I…” Shuichi’s voice came out in a shuddering whisper as Yuki opened his eyes once again to focus his golden gaze on his lover, who cringed under the silent interrogation. His violet eyes gleamed with moisture, but he shut them, unwilling to cry right now.
“…I can’t…” the rest of the statement came out in a mumble,
“What?” Yuki asked, waiting for Shuichi to speak up. He now stood up and towered over the pink-haired boy, who whimpered and tried to take a step back. Yuki’s hands came up in a flash and grabbed Shuichi’s shaking shoulders, keeping the boy where he was.
Shuichi now looked pathetically fragile and his skin seemed too pale, but Yuki was blinded by the need to know. The need for an explanation other than the one his mind was too willing to provide. A sort of desperation drove him to shake his lover harshly by the shoulders,
“Tell me!” he yelled as Shuichi stared up at him, fear evident in wide violet eyes. Suddenly, Shuichi began to shake his head violently, his strawberry colored hair flying.
“I can’t! I can’t tell you!” he screamed and his hands, which had been hanging at his sides, were now slapping and prying at Yuki’s arms and hands, trying futilely to make the blond let go of him, “Let me go! No! I can’t tell you! Let me go!”
A slap echoed through the apartment.
Shuichi fell to the ground quietly, making only a small thump as he fell to his knees, then onto the floor, still managing to stay sitting even if he was a bit slumped over and it was only his quivering arm which propped him up.
His other hand was covering the red mark, which was rapidly appearing on the boy’s pale, creamy skin. His whole right side of his face was now bright red. There would be an ugly bruise there. But the pain didn’t register in Shuichi’s mind because of how his face was numbing and also because of shock. Yuki…had slapped him.
Meanwhile, said blond stared at his red hand intently, then at the boy who was just barely still sitting on the ground. In a detached way, he was horrified with himself with slapping the boy, but the main thought on his mind now was of panic. Shuichi would leave him. It had been a secret fear of Yuki’s for…a long time now. He had quickly grown attached to his lover and somehow fallen in love with the little brat.
Anyway, he knew that Shuichi deserved to be treated better than what Yuki Eiri could offer him and every day, every time he had seen the hurt in those violet eyes after a meaningless insult slipped out, he had been afraid he would wake up one day and find Shuichi Shindou gone from his life. And that would kill him.
After what had happened yesterday and Shuichi actually leaving him for a night…and now this, when Shuichi had obviously been trying to reconcile with a fancy box of his favorite sweets…well, he knew it would happen sometime. Better to get it over with quickly.
“I’ll pack your bags for you. You can come get them whenever you want.” Yuki calmly stated, walking over to the coffee table to pick up the cigarettes he had dropped earlier.
Sticking one of the thin white sticks in between his lips, Yuki lit it and inhaled deeply, needing the anesthetizing drugs the cigarette offered. Running a hand through his hair, the novelist began to walk towards the bedroom, intent on starting the packing right away. If Shuichi was going to be gone from his life, then he wanted all reminders of him gone as soon as possible. Maybe that would make this separation easier.
But suddenly Yuki stopped as he felt a tug on his pants leg. Looking down, he saw Shuichi’s slender hand grabbing onto it,
“Don’t make me leave, onegai.” Shuichi whimpered, large lavender eyes luminous with unshed tears. For a moment, Yuki was completely confused, then realized that the brat was probably worried about finding a place to stay,
“You have enough money, you can rent your own apartment. Or stay at Hiro’s.” he said coldly, trying to take a step towards the bedroom.
“No, Yuki, I wanna stay.” Shuichi said, scooting forward to grab Yuki’s hand instead of his leg, “Please Yuki, please don’t make me go. I wanna stay here with you.”
‘He…doesn’t want to leave?’ Yuki thought, “…”
In the silence, the pink-haired vocalist’s tears began to fall and, desperate, he decided to tell Yuki,
“I…I went to the park…” Shuichi’s head was now bowed in shame. He knew that Yuki would berate him endlessly about it, but that was better than his lover throwing him out.
Stunned silence.
“But…Sakuma, Tohma, Tatsuha?” Yuki asked, finally revealing why he had been so furious when Shuichi had refused to tell him where he had been the previous night.
Shuichi blinked blankly up at Yuki, then flushed a brilliant red with indignation and embarrassment,
“I’m not a village bicycle, Yuki!” he shouted, standing up and beginning to stomp towards the kitchen where he knew a certain pint of strawberry-vanilla swirl ice cream was waiting for him in the freezer. ‘How…how can Yuki even think that I’m like that?!’
But warm arms around his waist from behind stopped Shuichi. Yuki leaned his head down to Shuichi’s slender neck and began to place feather kisses on it, mumbling in between,
“Of course, you’re my private property.” Yuki murmured, while Shuichi shuddered at both the intimate contact and the possessiveness in the blond’s tone.
“Mhmm…” was all Shuichi managed to say as he turned his head slightly to give Yuki better access to his creamy skin, mentally thanking Ryuichi for picking out a shirt with such a low neckline. Lazily, Yuki’s mouth headed towards Shuichi’s, trailing butterfly kisses along the way.
Finally reaching the singer’s sensuous lips, Yuki began to kiss Shuichi gently, which was a first for the man. The number of gentle kisses he had given could be counted on one hand. Yuki’s lips covered Shuichi’s, then pulled away almost breaking contact before swooping back in again.
Hesitantly, Shuichi let his mouth slacken and it opened, allowing Yuki’s skillful tongue in. The blond was almost giddy with happiness inside, although of course it didn’t show. It was rare for Shuichi to be so bold during their kisses. Usually, Yuki had to give him a not so subtle reminder or two. There were even a few times towards the start of their relationship that Yuki had had to physically pry Shuichi’s mouth open.
The novelist’s lips curved up in a smirk at that. His young lover had come a long way during their time together. To think that before, he had been a clueless little virgin. Then again, it wasn’t as if it was very different now. Actually, that was one of the things that Yuki loved about Shuichi. Even after making love to Yuki countless times, the vocalist still blushed innocently whenever Yuki suggested anything.
The blond’s hands, which were on Shuichi’s stomach, now crept down to the hem of the black silk tank top and sneaked under it so the novelist could run his fingers over Shuichi’s smooth stomach.
Shuichi giggled into Yuki’s mouth, breaking away from the kiss and also taking a much-needed breath of air. Arching one light brown eyebrow, Yuki uncertainly ran his fingers over Shuichi’s stomach again.
A similar reaction to the first bubbled out from Shuichi, making the boy giggle even more. Yuki’s smirk widened until it could almost be called an evil grin. Tackling the boy mercilessly, Yuki soon had Shuichi pinned under him in tears from laughter,
“Ack! No, stop!” Shuichi screamed, trying to wriggle playfully from Yuki’s hold.
“How about we just stay like this.” Yuki suggested, whispering in a husky voice in Shuichi’s ear before attacking the boy’s midriff again.
Shuichi screeched, then a mischievous glint entered his violet eyes. Wrapping his arms around Yuki’s neck, he pulled the man’s hand near him and his tongue darted out and traced along the outside of Yuki’s ear. The novelist suddenly stiffened, and Shuichi rolled him to the side easily, leaping up and running towards the bedroom.
When Yuki recovered, he leapt up growling and ran after Shuichi. Closing and locking the bedroom door behind him, he walked to the bed, where Shuichi was lounging, eyes closed and arms behind his head, relaxed.
With a predatoral gleam in his gold eyes, Yuki stalked around the bed, eyeing Shuichi almost hungrily. When Shuichi opened one eye to look at what his lover was doing, he was pounced and pinned again. But his time he had no intention of getting up for quite a while. Yuki agreed.
~*~
A/N: Hm...so it started with angst and then went to pure, OOC-Yuki fluff at the end. Now how did that happen? It was originally going to be angsty beginning and end with a tiny bit of fluff in the middle. Hn. Blame the fluff-muse.
Keep those reviews coming! Sorry about no updates for...a long while now. I should be getting back on track, so expect more quicker updates. Hopefully.
My ye olde reply to goodly ye olde reviewers. Ye. ^_^; Nice, 7 reviews? Keep 'em coming!
tweetynumair: Judging by your username...are you by any chance a Tamora Pierce fan? Anyway, well, hope you liked this chapter!
frubbu: O.o; As in saying my fic is bad and I should finish it already or as in my fic is good and I should update more? Well...I'll try to finish it, lol.
ShadowWarriorJessica: Ooh cool! I'm glad I had the honor of being the first Gravi fic you read! Hehehe, but cliffhangers are just so much fun!
Zilca: hehe, lol, ^_^ What happens? Well...to put it bluntly...he got laid. ^_^; Sorry...just my messed up sense of humor rearing its ugly head.
T: Hm...will Shuichi be okay? Dunno yet, you'll have to wait and see! ^_~ Thanks for reviewing and glad ya like my fic so far!