Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Liberation ❯ Chapter 6

Title: Liberation Part 5

Author: Sorceress Fantasia

Pairings: H+2, 3x4, and eventual 1+2

Warnings: AU, OC, some OOC-ness

Archives: Lev's Lair

Fanfiction.net

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Disclaimers: That day I went to the store counter in wherever Santa shops and asked for the GW boys. But when the clerk came back after searching their stocks, she told me that the GW boys had already been bought up. So, sadly, I do not own any of the GW boys or the anime. I do, however, own Vespera.

Duo paced around impatiently. "Vespera, where the hell are you?" he mumbled under his breath. As if on cue, a faint outline of her appeared from within his shadow cast onto the wall.

"What's up?" she asked. "You know, that was some perfect timing, Duo. I was talking to a friend of mine and you just had to call me. What's with you now?"

"I just have something to ask you," he replied, almost pouting.

"And what is it?"

For a moment, he flushed and scratched the back of his head. Then he asked sheepishly, "Well, I was just wondering… What do couples do when they're on a date?"

If she could, she would have fallen out of bed. But she was nowhere near that furniture, so she settled for a little sweatdrop.

"I… I'm running out of things to do with her! t's like, we've gone to the movies, we've gone to the disco, the restaurants, the parks, funfairs… Where else can we go?"

"I don't think I'm in the position to comment on your boring schedule with her. But, don't couples have a lot to do together?"

"Like?"

"Basking in each other's presence. A kiss. A hug. Anything. When you are with someone you love, you just enjoy being with that person. It's the feelings, the passion that you get. You feel like you're on the top of the world just being with her. What you're doing together is pretty secondary. Get my drift?"

At this, Duo sighed exaggeratedly. "I know that. But it's hard to feel that way."

"Because you're not in love with her," she stated flatly.

"I am!" he snapped irately.

Vespera frowned disapprovingly. Duo had never snapped or barked at her for as long as she could remember, but he had did it for the sake of a woman. "You sound like you're trying to assure yourself instead of me." Then, she turned around to leave. As she walked away, she offered, "Try out the beach today."

And then she was gone.

*****

The next few days passed by swiftly. Everyday, Duo would go out with Hirde, and then arrive back at the safehouse for a brainstorming session to decide what to do the next day. Occasionally, and when Vespera was in the mood for some talking, he would ask her for ideas. But it wasn't doing any good, because after all, it was not a long-term solution. His ideas and Vespera's contributions could only do so much. And even when he was out with Hirde, they were often at a loss as to what exactly to do. There was little to talk about apart from the war, but that was certainly not conversational material ideal for a dating couple.

As for Heero, he spoke with Vespera almost on a nightly basis. His childhood invisible friend was slowly becoming his confidant whom he talked to about many things few had ever known. She, on the other hand, supplied him with helpful answers and sometimes, thought-provoking questions. However, even with her around, Heero was still befuddled about his feelings towards the noisy braided pilot. He was sure that Duo was more than just a friend, but what was he to him then? He had no idea, and even though Vespera seemed to have an idea about it, she adamantly refused to tell him. Instead, she insisted that Heero should find out himself.

Once, in an attempt to get an opportunity of having Duo closer and hence increase his chances of understanding what he was feeling, Heero invited Duo out for dinner. It was a simple fare, and the quiet restaurant offered them a chance to really talk. When the night was over, they promised each other dinner again the next night. Eventually, it became almost a tradition to have dinner or supper together, just the two of them.

But that one meal wasn't enough for Heero, who wanted even more time with his braided friend when he found out just how wonderful it felt to be close to him. Soon, they began jogging together in the mornings.

Of course, that meant that Duo's time with Hirde became almost limited, but neither seemed too bothered by it after a while.

The other pilots saw the gradual change in Heero and silently cheered him on. Heero had long been their comrade, but he was slowly becoming their friend as well. They knew just how hard the Wing pilot's life had been, and were glad that he seemed to become happier. Besides, they were sure that a more socially active life would prove to be healthier for his psyche.

And somehow, they all knew that the change was due to a certain braided baka who did not seem to have the slightest idea about it.

*****

"I'll race you!" Duo shouted, and a burst of energy appeared forth to allow him to leave his jogging companion quite a distance behind.

Heero smirked, looking intently at the flailing braid behind his friend. Duo made such a lovely sight, even when he was covered in perspiration after a long jog. That was the one reason Heero had always trailed behind him whenever they jogged together, just so he could always keep an eye on him. But Heero hated to back down from a challenge.

Gathering up what was left of his stamina, he gave chase after the cheeky American pilot. It was a relatively easy task, since Duo was already tired after their long jog earlier, and he'd always been the one with more stamina. Within a few minutes, he had overtaken the braided boy with a lot of distance between.

"Oh no you don't! Nobody wins Death this easily!" Duo cried playfully, and immediately took off after him. With a bit of effort, he caught up with Heero again.

Eyeing the braided pilot from the corner of his eye, Heero found himself temporarily bedazzled by the amazing smile on Duo's face. It was bright, cheery and… just beautiful. Suddenly, he felt the burning desire to hold the braided boy in his arms. But apart from that craving, there was also some measure of rascality. Almost mischievously, he pounced on Duo, much like a cat diving on a mouse. Duo, who probably had never imagined that Heero could have a playful streak, was totally caught off guard by this surprise attack. They tumbled down onto the ground in a tangled web of arms and legs.

It was a while before they found themselves tangled together on the ground, and a while longer before Duo started to laugh aloud. His laughter was apparently contagious, for Heero found it difficult to stifle his own chuckles.

"Man, you're really crazy," Duo joked, giving Heero a little slap on his back. Carefully, he untangled himself from the comfortable cocoon of warmth of their bodies created. Sighing happily, he leaned back on the grass, gazing up at the clear blue sky.

The Japanese pilot just chuckled a little, and sat down beside Duo. "You've said that before."

Duo raised an eyebrow at the answer. Peering at Heero, he asked cheekily, "Who are you and what have you done to Heero?" When Heero just snorted, he let it slide. After all, he figured it was a tough question. Still, he wondered what had happened to his friend to initiate the change in him. Heero had, over the past few weeks, become a lot more amiable, though he still had a long way to go to becoming gregarious. Despite that, Heero was undeniably his best friend, past and present.

'Maybe he doesn't notice it, but Heero's really a good friend,' Duo thought.

But his mind countered, 'Are you sure that's all he is to you?' And that always rendered Duo speechless without fail. On a few occasions, he had tried to come up with an answer to that, but he always fell short. It just seemed that he wasn't ready to answer that yet.

For a long time, he had taken Heero to be his best friend, and nothing more than that. But now that Heero was suddenly showing a great deal of effort of returning his friendship, he wondered if it was actually possible to advance their relationship. Still, it wasn't as if Heero was trying to be anything more than just a friend either. Besides, he… Suddenly, Duo felt the need to ask him something rather private.

"Heero, do you like Relena?"

Heero was shocked for a moment, and he vaguely wondered why was Duo bringing up that girl. "Why do you ask?"

"Just… curious. I'm allowed to be curious about my friend, aren't I?"

To his relief, Heero gave him a nod and answered, "Yes, I do like her… a lot…"

In that moment, Duo finally understood how true it was that words were indeed a powerful weapon. Just that few words had managed to sink his heart and he quickly turned away lest Heero saw. Still, he didn't understand. Just why was he feeling almost… broken hearted?

Then, Heero added, "She's a good friend."

"Just a good friend?" Duo asked, turning back to look at him.

"Just a good friend."

While words had the power to hurt, they also had the power to heal. Instantly, Duo felt better already. His heart climbed up a few notches. He still had no idea what he was feeling, but at least, it felt good. And Duo had no intention of letting that wondrous sensation slip away again. At that thought, a smile broke out on his face.

Heero almost melted when he saw him smile that way. He wished for some absurd reason he could make this moment freeze in time, or frame it up just so that he could savour it everyday. Duo was beautiful everyday, but at that moment, as he smiled widely at him, he was heavenly.

Beautiful… how lovely you are, Duo, Heero mused.

But when Duo flushed a bright scarlet, he knew that he had spoken his thoughts aloud. Still, he refused to let Duo see his own embarrassment. After all, he spoke what he knew was the truth and there was definitely no need to be ashamed of the truth.

"Heero?"

"Yes?"

"Did you… Never mind," Duo mumbled, and rolled onto his stomach to hide his face. Although he couldn't see it, he knew without a doubt that his face was worse than a ripe tomato. But… who wouldn't, if Heero, the guy who seemed to have little acknowledgement of beauty, had said that they were beautiful?

In his embarrassment, Duo did not notice when Heero had picked up the end of his braid. Almost tempted to remove the elastic band, Heero just brushed it against his hands. In a moment of trance, he held it to his nose and breathed in its scent. It smelled… nice. He could faintly make out apricot. Was that the artificial fragrance of Duo's shampoo? No, he told himself. The smell was distinctively… Duo. And nothing could ever come close.

That afternoon, they just spent it together in the park, basking under the sun and each other's presence. And Duo just forgot about his afternoon date with his girlfriend.

*****

Heero slumped down onto the ground, or whatever it was he was sitting on. His dream world was mostly a shrouded dark world that seemed to have no beginning or end. He could be sitting on the ceiling for all he knew. That did not bother him though, for it was of little matter. Instead, he glanced up at the girl sitting in front of him.

"What is love?"

Vespera blinked hard for a moment, almost unbelieving that they had indeed gone so far. Then she smiled. "It's a feeling, an emotion that will bring you to the heights of glory and happiness. But sometimes, it can also bring you down to the deepest chasm of darkness that will threaten to engulf you. When you love someone, you don't find faults. Instead, you look for excuses."

"But what if it's friendship? How do you differentiate?"

"Do you stay because a blinding, incomprehensible mix of pain and elation pulls you close and holds you? Does your heart ache and break when they're sad? Does his eyes see your heart in its entirety, and touch your soul so deeply it hurts? If it does, it's love. There's just a thin line between love and friendship. When you love someone, he's not just someone you love. He's also your friend, your confidant."

"If love is painful, and tortures us so, why do we love? Why do we spend our lives searching for that one person who can break you like no one else ever could? Why do we submit ourselves to that power?"

"Because… it's love," she answered simply. "Love may hurt you, may even cripple you. But would you give up the chance of getting your happiness, the feeling of elation and ecstasy, just because you're afraid? Love can make your pain clearer, but it can also make your soul happier. I won't say that love conquers all, because it doesn't. But if you manage to conquer all for love, I can assure you that you're one of the happiest man alive."

"I want to know what love is… but can I actually understand it?"

"Heero, I've showed you what's inside your heart. You are, like many others, innocent and naïve at heart. It is a state of mind, not a fact. You've killed in the name of peace, but that does not make you any less of a man. And that alone, will enable you to find love. Lands diminish, Heero, but not our hearts." She placed a gentle hand over her heart.

Heero went silent.

"You may lie to yourself, but you will never lie to your heart. You know why you love, and whom you love. Don't ever ignore what you feel. Sometimes, it's better to believe your heart than your mind."

Heero nodded mutely, his mind still in deep contemplation.

*****

"Duo, how are things between you and Hirde? Is it working out? There's only three days left before our deadline," Vespera reminded, propping her feet on his chair. Somehow, she preferred to sit on the table rather than the chair, much to the annoyance of the braided pilot.

Said pilot plopped down onto his bed, feeling completely zonked. Kicking off his shoes absently, he snuggled into a comfortable spot. "I know that. We will work out, eventually."

"Eventually?" she echoed, as if tauntingly. "Duo, it's three days, not three months. It's a difference of around eighty over days," Vespera remarked, blowing her bangs away from her eyes. When they kept falling back, she pulled them back with a careless swipe. "I hope that you didn't forget about the test either."

That seemed to be a cue, and Duo immediately sprang up from his bed to stare at her. "Test? What test?"

Vespera rolled her eyes in frustration. "So you *did* forget. You're such scatterbrain. Of all things to forget, you choose to forget about the test. Okay, you remember something about testing whether the love between you and your lover is strong enough?"

Duo's eyes widen as he remembered. "You mean *that*?"

"Finally," she breathed. "But I know for a fact that you've forgotten about the details, right? So, I'll fill you in. Again. The test will weigh your love for each other. And your lover's love for you must be at least as much as you love her, or even more. But of course, you must love her too, enough for her to be your lover and not just a mere friend."

"Oh shit…"

"Why?" Vespera asked in all sweetness.

"I… I just don't feel that way towards her yet! Or rather, I like her a lot. But I'm not sure if that is enough!"

"So make it enough," she replied innocently, as though she was asking why was the sky blue.

Duo's shoulders slumped. Sulking, he replied, "You know, Vespera? Sometimes, I really do hate you."

She just smirked.