The Claim - part 5

by KatiKat

It was around midnight when Trowa declared the baby gone. His look was grim as he carefully folded the piece of cloth that contained the bloody evidence of what might have been. In this early stage of a lifebearer´s twelve month pregnancy, the baby hadn´t been more than a little lump of blood and tissue but he would make sure that it was buried properly. It had been a living being after all and so the end of this life would be honored in a proper manner.

Some time after the body cleansed itself, the bleeding had slowed until only a few bright red spots marked the white piece of linen. It would be a couple of days before the torn tissue and veins knitted themselves back together and the bleeding stopped completely. Until then Duo would have to eat soft foods only and a healing ointment that should help prevent an infection, would need to be applied on the aggravated areas in his rectum.

The first rays of the autumn sun lit the hut through the window they had opened in an attempt to cool down the raging fever that had now finally broken, leaving Duo covered in sweat, his brows furrowed as a nightmare hit his dreamscape. Heero and Trowa however, could breathe a sigh of relief. The battle for the lifebearer´s life had been won. But what would the loss of his child do to his already damaged psyche?

*-*-*-*-*-*

"So don´t forget. Duo must drink the brew at least twice a day. Three times would be better," Trowa reminded his friend whilst packing his things.

Heero nodded, closing the heavy shutters on the window. He didn´t want the lifebearer to get even sicker now that his fever had broken.

Trowa slung his plain linen pack over his shoulder, then moved to the bed once again. Lightly he touched Duo´s flushed cheeks with his cool hand. The lifebearer still felt warm but the raging fever was fortunately gone. Trowa pulled the blanket up to Duo´s chin then straightened.

"I want you to use the ointment I left you here. Rub it into the skin of his abdomen. The cramps are gone but they put a great strain on the muscles and the ointment will help to loosen them."

Heero nodded again, his eyes lingering on the lifebearer too. Duo´s prostrate form lay unmoving under a heavy blanket. He hadn´t stirred since they last forced him to drink the brew Trowa made. The Healer didn´t seem worried about it though. He said that it could be a couple more hours before Duo woke up. The lifebearer´s body was exhausted to the point of unconsciousness.

After nodding to himself, Trowa turned around and walked to the door. He opened it and stepped outside. It was a beautiful although cold day. The smell of winter hung in the air. Heero walked after him, stopping in the doorway.

Trowa took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a moment, letting the weak sun dance across his face. He was so tired...

"Thank you for everything," Heero said, breaking the silence that had settled between them.

The Healer turned to his equally tired looking friend. "Should he get worse, just send Shinigami for me. I don´t think that it will happen though."

Heero nodded.

Trowa moved to walk away, then stopped and turned back to his friend. "Heero... maybe this warning is unnecessary but... watch out for him," he said quietly pointing at the hut. "To lose a child is the worst thing that could happen to a lifebearer. In his desperation to be reunited with his child he might do something... drastic and very, very foolish."

Heero didn´t say anything. He knew exactly what his friend was talking about. Suicide. It wasn´t an uncommon occurrence among lifebearers who had lost their child. For them it was as if a part of themselves was missing, for they were linked to their children until the day they themselves died. Only the strongest survived such a loss. And even then they needed much care, patience and a lot of support.

"You need to give him a purpose to live for," Trowa explained. "The first couple of days are critical. If you help him overcome his deep depression he´ll be on the best road to recovery, not only physically but psychologically too."

Heero nodded again, not sure how he would be able to do it though. He wasn´t the best person for giving comfort. When his friend still hesitated, he raised his eyebrows at him.

"Mind if I ask you a question?" Trowa asked quietly.

The Enforcer shrugged. It didn´t mean he had to answer.

"Whose child was it?"

Heero blinked. "Does it matter now?" he answered with a question of his own.

Trowa looked at him for a while. "No, I don´t think it matters anymore," he agreed. Then he turned around and walked away.

*-*-*-*-*-*

Duo felt hot and his whole body ached. He tried to move but his limbs felt so heavy. Slowly he opened his eyes and blinked a couple of times. The hut. He was in Heero´s hut. He turned his head to the side slightly and spotted Heero by the fireplace. The Enforcer was pouring something into a small ceramic cup. Suddenly Duo realized how thirsty he was. He tried to swallow but his throat burned.

He must have made some noise for a big black head popped into his field of vision. The dog. What was his name again? Oh yeah, Shinigami. The black beast was giving him his version of a happy smile but Duo couldn´t muster the strength to smile back.

"I see you´re awake."

Heero´s voice made Duo tear his eyes away from the dog. He watched the Enforcer cross the small hut and sit on the edge of the bed. The lifebearer tried to say something but his tongue was just too dry.

"Here," Heero said. Helping him raise his head he held the cup to his lips.

At first the moisture felt like heaven, but then the bitter taste hit his tongue and Duo´s brows furrowed. He didn´t like it. He tried to move his head away but Heero frowned at him.

"You have to drink all of it. The Healer ordered it!"

The Healer? Oh yes, he remembered a man with weird bangs hiding one of his eyes. The Healer had had gentle, cold hands and he had been smiling at him every time Duo woke up. In his presence the lifebearer had had the feeling that someone really cared for him after all. Heero´s hands, which held him firmly but gently, let Duo feel the same thing now. Someone cared.

When the cup was empty and Heero laid Duo´s head back down on the pillow, the longhaired young man croaked out: "Wha´ happ´nd?"

"You had a high fever and you lost a lot of blood," Heero explained, looking at the cup in his hands.

Duo frowned. Blood? He bled? How...? Horror gripped his heart and his hands, the same hands that hadn´t been able to move just minutes ago, moved at lightning speed to touch his flat abdomen. The baby...? In his mind he searched for the gentle connection that had been there since the moment the baby had been sired. He hadn´t noticed it for a long time since it had developed so slowly and naturally. But now, the lack of that connection hit him with full force. He gripped his abdomen, his mind racing frantically.

"Nonononono..." He didn´t even realize that he was repeating this mantra out loud, his whole mind frozen, unable to handle such a tragedy.

"Duo..." Heero laid his hand on Duo´s shoulder but the lifebearer recoiled from the touch. His violet eyes wide open, pleading with Heero to deny what he already knew, to tell him he was wrong, to...

But Heero couldn´t lie to him. Not about this. "Your baby is gone," Heero whispered, killing the last spark of hope in those beautiful eyes.

Dead... his baby was dead! All consuming pain ripped through the lifebearer´s heart and mind. Duo turned on his side facing the wall, his back to Heero. He curled up in a fetal position as much as his hurting body would allow. He felt his mind shutting down, the only possible reaction to a situation he couldn´t handle. He didn´t fight the cold feeling that spread through his body. He shut himself off from the outside world. Nothing mattered anymore, for his child was dead.

Dead...

*-*-*-*-*

They settled into a quiet routine. Heero forced Duo to eat and drink, took care of his wounds and didn´t let the lifebearer out of his sight while Duo remained totally unresponsive, locked in his own private hell. Nothing Heero did managed to break through the cold shell that had settled in Duo´s beautiful eyes. And although he tried over and over again, he knew, that the only thing he could do was wait.

It was on the third day after the lifebearer woke up that Heero had to go out to hack some wood. He was swinging the axe as quickly as possible not wanting to leave Duo alone for too long when he heard a crash come from the house. He dropped the axe and ran back to the hut, a cold feeling gripping his heart.

When he threw the door open he froze. On the floor in the middle of the hut Duo was half sitting, half kneeling, the blankets twisted around his body, hair spread about him like a chestnut waterfall. His face was twisted in grief, his eyes tightly closed. Next to him Shinigami was lying, his head on Duo´s naked knee, whining loudly. The dog didn´t understand what was going on, but he knew that something was wrong.

But what made Heero´s throat tighten and his heart beat wildly was the hunting knife in Duo´s hands. Head thrown backwards, he was holding it up, pointing at the jugular on his neck.

Then the knife swung down.

TBC