Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ The Quest For Twenty Bucks ❯ Phase 2A ( Chapter 2 )

AFTER SEVERAL WEEKS OF ILLEGALIZED PROSTITUTION....

 

"Look Wu-communist-chinese man, this just isn't working." Duo said as Wu-squinty-eyed bastard stopped running around simply because he was out of that Ol' fashion street corner Ho energy.

 

"Yeah -huff- I know -huff- what you -huff- mean."

 

"Wufer, why do you keep saying huff?"

 

"Uh...............................JUSTICE!"

 

"Uh-huh. Look, anyway we need a new idea to make some quick cash. After all, the deadline is in just 6 months."

 

"Hmm... I see..."

 

"Yeah, we only have about 12 weeks."

 

".....You mean twenty six."

 

"Right."

 

After much idiotic and incessant babbling Wu-gotta-catch-'em-all had a break-through. And what a breakthrough it was. In fact, it was a breakthrough of immeasurable size, like anal pleasure or something. NO REALLY! Have you ever had a BOULDER for a turd? After pushing and straining 'til your out of breath you hear a satisfying SPLOOSH! Yes, it was that great of a break-through.

 

"I GOT IT! Ok, here's what we do..."

-steriotypically fade out just as Wu-just-commited-beastiality-with-various-farm-animals whispered his ever-so diligant plan into Duo's ear.

 

 

PHASE 2-A, THE FELINE 69 (ALSO A CLEVER SEX JOKE)

 

 

"NO WAY!" recoiled Duo in the sheer terror of the line of work Wu-doo just spoke of.

 

"Listen," said Wu-oh-my-God-I-have-got-to-piss. "do you wanna sacrifice your Gundam for a silly thing like dignity?"

 

"Umm, actually ye-"

 

"EXACTLY! You don't! No one supporting JUSTICE would!"

 

"But Wu-seriously-the-author's-bladder-pressure-is-monsterous I really don-"

 

"GOOD! You are in complete agreement!Now THAT is JUSTICE!"

 

They both hopped in their car, and upon realizing they had no car fell flat on their nice- er awesome asses.

 

"Well, we have to get a JUSTICE car if we're going to get you that job..."

 

"Nah, I really don't think we nee-"

 

And as luck would have it Wu-seriously-dude-I-have-been-holding-this-for-like-an-hour pointed to a car rental place, conviently named "Shit Creek's Paddle" aslo convienently 3 feet from their recently busted back-bones. It was kind of a run-down, ghetto establishment really. Duo and Wu-I-think-my-bladder-just-exploded walked slowly (and in Duo's case regretfully) to the door and knocked.

 

"Well! Looks like no ones here so I just think I'm gonna-"

 

"You are going to stay right here until someone comes to the door an-"

 

"Hello thar! What can I do fer ye?" Spouted a short, fat red bearded irish man.

 

"Look kind sir," said Wu-oh-my-God-my-crotch-is-bleeding above Duo's incessant whisperings of "hes lying" and "we dont need it" Wu-wu-wa-wa continued "we need a car....for free."

 

"Are you tryin' ter rob me?"

 

"Um.. no."

 

"Well, jes' so happens that we do got one car, yeah imported from that far eastern place... Japan I think it was... Come have yerself a look."

 

"Thank you sir, you are doing a kind JUSTICE!"

 

"What was that?"

 

"Er nothing....justice..."

 

So, after going into the shop Duo and Wu-kie (pronounced like Wookie) emerged from the shop victorious...somewhat...

 

 

 

 

"I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE WE ARE DRIVING A HELLO KITTY PUNCH BUGGY WITH A GIANT 69 PAINTED ON THE ROOF!" yelled Duo at his idiotic partner.

 

"Look, in the battlefield you learn to take what's available to you at the time" retorted Wu-a-camel-bit-my-sister-once.

 

"WE'RE NOT IN A FUCKING BATTLEFI-WHOA!" and Duo was cut off as Wu-no-seriously-it-was-all-bleeding-and-stuff sped up to shut his partner up.

 

NEXT TIME!

 

Phase 2-B, Duo and Wu-ha-ha-bitch-you-gotta-wait-til-I-write-the-next-chapter finally arrive at their destination, where they hope that Duo can obtain at least a portion of the twenty dollars they need.