Harry Potter - Series Fan Fiction ❯ Parenting Skills 101 - A Remus and Sirius Adventure ❯ At The Risk of Being Cliché - The Lost Chapter ( Chapter 6 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

I watched stunned as the small alien-like thing turned into a small gray wolf. I turn to Remus, his scared eyes stare into my shocked ones right before he rushes out of the classroom. “Remus, wait!” Lily yelled as she ran towards the door. She pulled her head back in a moment later, a worried expression gracing her features.

The gray wolf was now slumbering on the table next to me, breathing lightly as if it were sleeping. Lily picked it up sadly, stroking its fur gently before burying her face into its soft silky fur. I looked around the room to see that most of the students had a look of disgust and fear etched on their faces, it made me sick. So what if Remus was a werewolf? He was still the same person he was before they knew what he was, the only difference is now they know his secret.

I turned to see McGonagall, James, Peter and Snape shaking their heads, worry showing clearly on their features. I stood abruptly and started to make my way towards the classroom door, McGonagall nodding her allowance. “Where are you going Black? He is awerewolfbloodthirsty monster. He’ll kill you if he gets close enough,” said a sixth year girl whose name I did not care to remember.

I turned on her, my anger boiling just below the breaking point. “Remus is not a monster; he has never hurt anything in his life! He’s a flipping pacifist for god’s sake! But no, you wouldn’t care about that would you? You couldn’t careless that Remus was the one who would stay up late at night just to help one of you idiots with homework or studying. You couldn’t careless that Remus is always nice to everyone, and is willing to help whoever needs it. You couldn’t careless that he has saved each and every one of your asses every month by locking himself up in that blasted shack! No, you couldn’t give a fuck about any of that because all you care about is appearances. Remus is not the monster you guys are. You gu-”

I was cut off when scrawny - but surprisingly strong- arm grabbed my cloak and pushed me towards the door. “Go now, stop wasting time! I’ll handle these idiots.” Snape said giving me a final push towards the door. “Now, before he leaves!”

Lily nods her head in agreement, “He needs you Sirius go, I’ll take care of her. Just ignore these idiots and get Remus back to us.”

Crap I had forgot about the wolf, I nodded, “You’re right I have to go. Thanks you guys!” I ran full speed towards the Gryffindor Tower, yelling the password halfway down the hallway just so I didn’t have to wait for the blasted door to open.

I rushed through the common room, not really caring if I knocked someone over; I skidded to a halt in front of the fifth year dorm taking a deep breath before turning the knob.



Empty. His bed was empty. Neat and clean, and cleared of all his personal belongings. All his poster’s gone. His books, gone leaving the bookcase atop his headboard completely and depressingly empty. His nightstand no longer held the picture of the four of us. The one that Lily had taken for us the first day of first year. His draws were empty, not even a piece of lint could be found. It wasn’t until I looked at the foot of his bed did I find something.

Seven pieces of parchment held down by a worn photo album. One of the pieces of parchment I recognized as the Marauder’s Map. Its distinguishing quality was the worn look, torn and crumpled as if someone had thrown it out. The other six looked fairly new save a tear or wrinkle here and there, as if their previous owner had written something on them and was waiting for the right time to give them to whoever it had been for. Just like a love letter a thirteen year old girl writes to her crush in September only to save it and give it to said crush on valentines day, if ever at all.

I picked up the photo album, and placed it on the bedside table. Noticing that the parchment on top of the pile had my name scribbled with his elegant handwriting, I picked it up and placed the rest of the parchment with the album.

I sat back against his pillows, and carefully opened the parchment afraid of what the elegant writing on the inside would reveal. I took a deep breath before beginning to read,

Sirius,

If you are reading this, that means one of three things have happened. It is possible that you have received this letter because I have found life too much too bare- this is not really a possibility and is most likely not the reason so you can let out that breath I know you have been holding in.

I let out the breath slowly that I didn’t know I was holding in, he knows me all too well.

Now that I got that out of my system, there is really only one of two reasons as to why you would be receiving this letter. The first may be that I have to move away, - I am only putting this because Dad lost the mansion and I have no idea as to where we are going to live-. The second reason (And the most likely) is because our classmates have found out about my condition. If this is the case then you already realize why this letter was left and should know that it would be futile trying to find me. For I will probably be out of the wizarding world before you even get to Lunch or where ever it is you would usually be heading had I not left this letter, (I really hope that it’s not class Padfoot a missing friend is no reason to binge on your education).

Anyway, there is something that I have been meaning to tell you for sometime now, something extremely important. -takes a deep breath lets it out and just writes- I am in love with you Sirius. I have no idea as to what attracts me to you… no that’s a lie there are many things that I could name right now. The way you looked excited right before pulling a prank. The way you sit on a chair with the two front legs in the air, leaning back so that your long hair falls behind the chair in long waves. The way your mood could affect everyone in a room. The way you couldn’t careless about what people think about you. The way you throw yourself over my lap and dramatically act as if your life is about to end because no one would entertain you. I love all those things but what I love most about you Sirius is your unwavering loyalty towards your friends, and your unsurpassable bravery. Those two things are what attract me to you the most Sirius.

What I want to say though is thank you. Thank you for everything that you have done for me. What you did for me, I could never express the way I feel about it. I could never express the love I felt for you. How scared I felt that it would go wrong. How grateful I felt when it did work and how much fun I had running around with you guys in the Forbidden Forest on those full-mooned nights. Unfortunately, that won’t be the case anymore. No longer will I be able to run around with the three most important people in my life. Never would I be able to eat, laugh, play or scold you guys. But most of all I will no longer be able to watch you Sirius and that is my biggest regret.

Listen I had better go now. I am sorry for everything Sirius, and I hope that this letter will leave you with reassurance that I will be all right. I will be fine Sirius; I can take care of myself. I need you to promise me one more thing before I end this letter Sirius. I need you to promise me that you will take care of yourself and Regulus. He needs his brother; he’s scared of becoming like his Slytherin companions. Make sure you listen to him, and watch over him. I also need you to promise me that you will not come looking for me. I promise that I will come back someday. I have no idea as to when, but I will come back. Lastly, I need you to promise me that you will be happy at any cost. Never give up hope Sirius and everything will work out in the end. Well now I really had better go Madam Pomphrey is glaring at me. I love you Sirius and remember to take care of yourself.

R.J.L

I took a deep breath to try and calm my nerves. Tears spilled down my cheeks against my will, I didn’t understand this. Why did he have to leave? We could have protected him, could have helped him. What the hell is the point in having friends if you don’t let them help you? “Shite!” I punched his pillow over and over again, letting the tears spill not really caring anymore. “Damn it Remus! How could you do this!? How the hell could you do this to us? To the Marauder’s? How could you do this to me?” I had calmed down a little now, breathing heavily and shaking violently.

“Damn it Remus how could you do this to me? How could you leave me like this? It isn‘t supposed to be like this! We are supposed to be graduating together me, you, James and Peter. Then me and James are supposed to become aurors, you becoming the Defense teacher and Pete moving away. All the while, James and Lily are supposed to get married and move into a big house with a yard and a white picket fence and a dog named Chuck. They are supposed to have a son where they would name me and you the godparents. You and I would move into a small flat near their home. Peter would come back from where ever the hell it is that he was with a wife. Them too moving close to Lily and James. That‘s how everything is supposed to be, Remus. We are supposed to join the Order as soon as we become of age. That is how everything is supposed to be… not like this. How do you expect us to live in a world without you? Howe do you expectmeYou are telling me to be happy Remus but the only time I am truly happy is when I am with you. Damn it Remus come back!”

“Seri?” Came a small pained voice from behind me.

I turned around quickly, ready to hex whoever was in the dorm but stopped myself when I saw that it was only Regulus. “Reg… you heard?” I looked at him and what I saw broke my heart. He looked like a complete mess. His hair was in disarray and his clothes were all messed up as if he had been fighting. Wait a moment. I jumped off the bed and grabbed Regulus’ face bringing it up into the light. Hehadbeen fighting; a black eye could be seen now; no longer hidden by his hair. “How did this happen? I demand an answer Regulus.”

I was pissed not only had Remus left, someone had hurt my baby brother; someone needed to pay and it sure as hell wasn’t Regulus. Regulus pulled away from me and looked down ashamed, tears filled his eyes and my anger instantly went way, worry filling the void. “Reggie c’mon tell me what happened.” I pulled him towards me, and sat on the bed, making him lean against me.

He buried his face in my robes and wrapped his arms around my waist, hugging me tightly. “Well I happened to overhear some girls taking about what had happened in your class, and how they couldn’t believe that sweet and innocent Remus was actually a vicious bloodthirsty werewolf. So I had said that Remus wasn’t a blood thirsty werewolf, that he was an ordinary teenage boy that turned a little hairy during the full moon cycles.” I smiled a little at that, Regulus was always coming up with interesting things.

“Then what happened? Surely they didn’t give you a black eye for that.”

Regulus shook his head and pushed away from me, leaning back on his elbows so that his hair was floating behind his head. “It had nothing to do with them; they looked at me guiltily and walked away. The sixth year Slytherins on the other hand are how I received this.” he said pointing to his face. “They were saying bad things about Remus, and I got really pissed at them and cursed them. One thing lead to another and somewhere along the line we had lost our wands and somehow they winded up with hanging from the ceiling, with their underwear showing.”

I sighed and muttered a spell to rid the discoloration from my brothers face, “That still doesn’t explain the black eye, and you really shouldn‘t so that to people Regulus.”

He shrugged, “It doesn’t really matter, and it was for Remus. You did it to Snape all year last year.”

I pushed myself back against the headboard, motioning for Regulus to follow. Placing his head on my shoulder, he looked at the parchment in my hand questioningly. “What’s that Seri?”

I placed it on the nightstand and grabbed the parchment with his name, handing it to him. “It’s a letter that Remus had wrote to me. The one I just gave you is yours. The other four are for the others. It’s Remus’ goodbye letter.”

“Oh,” he placed the parchment beside him as tears started to fall again. I pulled him to me, allowing him to ruin my robes with his tears. “Why did he have to leave Seri? Why couldn’t he stay and have us help him?” I pushed his tear soaked hair from his face, rocking him gently back and forth, like how I used to when we were kids and he had gotten a nightmare.

“Remus is the independent type. He hates to ask anyone for help, I guess this is easier on him. We’ll get him back Reg we have to, what will we do with out him?”

Regulus shook his head, and wiped his tears from his face with the back of his hand. “Are you sure we can do this? Are you sure, we can find him? His family lost Lupin Mansion so it’s not going to be as easy as going there, not that getting there would have been a piece of cake to begin with.”

I shrugged, “We are Blacks we can do anything, and for once that’s a good thing.”

Regulus smiles slightly. “So by summer you reckon?”

I looked at my little brother in mock annoyance, “You have no faith in me do you? I’ll have him back by Valentines day.”

Regulus lifts himself up and puts his back to the headboard, leaning his head on my shoulder. I ran my fingers through his hair before kissing his head reassuringly. “I love you Regulus.”

Reg leans against me more heavily, gradually falling into a slumber. “I love you too Sirius.” I leaned my head against his and allowed sleep to consume me.

I can get through anything as long as Regulus is by my side.

I ran out of the classroom, trying to get the image of the small gray wolf out of my mind. Tears started to fall from my eyes and I felt as if my chest was about to burst, and not from the lack of oxygen. I would have to leave the school now. I will never be able to sit with them at meals again. Never again will I be able to pull harmless pranks on unsuspecting Slytherins. But mostly -and this is what I regret most of all- I will never be able to be with Sirius again, to watch him as he lays back carelessly on a chairs two back legs, his hair falling behind his head in gentle waves.

I ran down the seventh floor corridor, stopping briefly to tell the fat lady the password, before rushing into my dorm. I pulled my trunk from under my bed and kicked it open. I grabbed the books from the bookshelf above my bed and placed them on top of my clothes. I ran into the bathroom and grabbed my toothbrush, throwing it onto. I grabbed the pictures on my bedside table and placed them carefully in between my clothes so the frames wouldn’t brake. I dumped the contents of my drawers into my trunk, reminding myself that I had to be out of the dorm before the bell signaling the next period began.

I pulled the Marauder’ map out of my pocket and placed it on the foot of my bed. Slipping open the secret compartment of my trunk and I pulled out six parchment, each addressed to one of my six friends. They were slightly worn and I had to straighten out the creases but they would have to do. I placed them on top of the map, placing my old photo album over them so they wouldn’t be blown onto the floor by the wind blowing in from the window next to my bed. I walked around the room once more, hardly believing that it was over. Hardly believing that I will never be in this room again hanging out with my friends.

I walked over Sirius’ bed a picture of me and the marauders first Hogsmeade trip caught my eye. It showed all four of us arms around each other’s necks grinning like idiots. I remember that day well, it was the first time me and Sirius kissed. It had been right after we ditched James and Peter to sneak up to the shrieking shack.

“Remus! Remus! You have to see this!” yelled an excited thirteen-year-old Sirius Black, running up to his friend and pulling the book, the sandy haired boy had been reading right out of his hand. Throwing the book on the nearest shelf he said, “They have a whole shop filled with Chocolate! A whole shop Remus!”

Sirius glared at his best friend, “No not wait I’m trying to get him alone. It’s too embarrassing with the amount of people around.”

James looked thoughtful for a moment. “If you were to go to the shrieking shack then you would be able to get some privacy. No one goes up there because of the noises.” James flinched slightly as Sirius raised his hand to hit his friend over the head.

“Yeah, go to the place that he absolutely hates to be to tell him I love him. That will work out extraordinarily well.” said Sirius sarcastically, turning back to watch Remus as he went to the counter to pay for his goodies.

James put his head down and whispered in Sirius’ ear, “You never know I heard that it is extraordinarily beautiful up there, romantic it’s where I plan to bring Lily when I get her.”

“You mean if you get her,” said Sirius teasingly, “Seriously though, how am I going to tell him?”

James slapped him gently on the back, “I have it handled mate don’t worry about it.” James motioned to Peter, “Pete lets go to the Three Broomsticks to get seats while Remus goes with Sirius to pick up something from the post office.”

Peter nodded and followed James out of the store, winking at Sirius on the way out. “Good Luck mate.”

Sirius slapped Peter on the back “Thanks. Hey, make sure James doesn’t make too much of an idiot out of himself when I’m gone I wouldn’t want to miss it.”

Peter walked out of Honeydukes smiling slightly to himself. Remus came up to Sirius a excited look crossing his face, “Sirius I got enough chocolate to last till the end of next month!”

Sirius smiled slightly, nervousness making his stomach queasy. “That’s great Remus. Would you mind coming some where with me?”

Remus looked at Sirius nervously, not quite willing to be alone with him. “Where are James and Peter?”

Sirius tried not to look crestfallen when the words left Remus’ mouth but he did not quite succeed. “Oh, um. James and Pete went to the Three Broomsticks, they are getting a table for us… Could you please come with me? There is something really important that I have to tell you.”

Remus nodded, “Alright. But first, tell me where we are going. I absolutely loath surprises.”

Sirius nodded his head in agreement, “Fair enough, I was thinking a walk to the shrieking shack.” Sirius was never one to beat around the bush.

“So that’s what you and James were talking about,” said Remus thoughtfully on the way out of the shop, “Alright we can go but I am not letting you see the inside.”

Sirius nodded happily and began to drag Remus towards the Shack. “Thanks Rem! You won’t be disappointed!”

Remus sighed and shook his head, “I hope not.”



It took about twenty minutes to get up the sloped, rocky hill. It was deathly silent between the two boys in that time, both of them too nervous around each other to really speak. When the old shack came into view, both boys stopped in their tracks not really sure of what to do. Finally, the silence annoyed Sirius enough that he threw up his hands in frustration. This caused his companion to look at him worriedly. “Sirius what was it you needed to speak to me about?”

Sirius ran his hand through his hair, before speaking. “Well as I said before it is important. I-I really don’t know how to say this Remus. God I’m sweating, umm why don’t you sit down Remus?”

Remus looked around before pointing out the obvious, “There is no where to sit Sirius and I refuse to sit on this dirt ridden ground.”

Sirius leaned against the nearest tree frustrated, “Fine stand… shite it wasn’t supposed to be this hard.”

Remus walked up to Sirius pushing the stray hair that had gotten stuck onto his forehead out of Sirius’ eyes. “Sirius I can’t say I understand. What’s not supposed to be this hard?”

Sirius took a deep breath before looking into his best friends amber eyes, taking a deep breath he pushed himself from the tree and nervously looked into Remus’ eyes before leaning forward slightly as if to test himself. He moved forward when Remus didn’t pull away, they would have had the perfect first kiss if there weren’t for the tradition of first kisses being awkward.

So of course, Remus had moved to far to the left, which cause Sirius to get a mouthful of hair- not the most pleasant of experiences. Then because Remus had been so embarrassed, he tried to kiss Sirius’ cheek so that he didn’t look stupid. Though Sirius thought that Remus was going for his mouth so he lowered his lips, which had caused Remus to poke Sirius in the eye with his nose. Finally, Sirius had gotten so frustrated that he just grabbed Remus’ head and pressed his lips to the shocked boys.

At first, it was awkward and Sirius didn’t really know what to do so he gently moved his mouth against Remus’. Remus followed his example finally having gotten over the shock of having a pair of lips against his. It was awkward -as all were- but to them it felt like home, they felt safe there in their own little world. Sirius pulled away gently, kissing the smaller boys forehead. “That’s what I wanted to tell you Remus. I wanted to tell you that I really like you and I think that we should go out.”

Remus shook his head his fingers gently touching his lips, “I’m sorry Sirius but that’s just not possible.”

Sirius balled his hands into fists, “Why the hell not Remus.”

“Because Werewolves mate for life.”



I place down the photo and sigh, shaking my head as I walk to my trunk; trying to rid my mind of the memories it was trying to force me to remember. Shutting the lid to my trunk the clicking of the lock sounded with the sort of finality parents use when kids try to get their way.

Reducing the trunks size to that of a quarter, I shoved it into my pocket and made my way towards the window. Standing on the ledge I whispered, “Good bye Sirius.” before jumping from the ledge.

McGonagall watched sadly from her office window as one of her favorite student’s jumped from his dorm window and landed neatly on his feet, walking away from the castle and towards the Forbidden Forest. Shaking her head, she turned away from the scene not wanting to see anymore. Minerva would never admit it had one were to ask her but she has had a close relationship with Remus ever since he first came to Hogwarts.

A small sandy haired boy stood nervously in front of the desk of the Head of Gryffindor house. Pulling on his robes and biting his bottom lip as he waited for her to come up from the feast. “You must be Mr. Lupin.” came a voice from behind the boy startling him.

“Y-yes Madam. My name is Remus Lupin.” He looked away from the transfiguration teacher as he spoke, as if afraid she would hurt him if he were to look her in the eye.

“Please sit down Mr. Lupin. There’s no need to be frightened, no one is going to hurt you here,” she said sitting behind her desk.

The boy looked at the chair wearily before shaking his head, “I couldn’t even if I would like to Madam. You see the chair is made out of silver; it is fatal to werewolves.”

McGonagall mentally hit herself on her head for her stupidity, the boy was a nervous wreck as it is without him thinking that the teachers are out to get him. “Oh that’s right I apologize that was my own stupidity, here you go.” she summoned a wooden chair and motioned for him to sit. He studied it carefully before sitting on its edge.

“Thank you madam.” The boy said still not meeting McGonagall’s eyes. Instead, he was looking around the room at the various paintings that decorated it.

“Mr. Lupin as you know we are taking every precaution possible in order for you to attend Hogwarts. There is no reason to be so nervous.”

Lupin’s knee was bouncing up and down, and he bit his lip a little harder than necessary causing it to bleed. “I know Professor it’s just… I can’t help but not understand as to why you would let a monster into a school like this. It’s very prestigious and if the parents were to find out about me, it would ruin the school’s reputation.”

McGonagall looked at the boy with curiosity, “You’re not a monster Mr. Lupin, and I’m sure anyone who knows you thinks of you as such. This school prides itself in being different Mr. Lupin; we stand out from all the rest because we are not afraid to take chances.”

“So in other words I am a charity case.” said Lupin, the venom in his voice shocked the headmistress.

“Mr. Lupin the reason you are in this school is because you have been on this list since the time of your birth, not because you are a charity case.”

“No the only reason I am in this school is because Dumbledore took pity on me. The Headmaster that retired last year didn’t allow me in the school. That’s why I am a year older than the other first years.” Lupin stood up and tears started to flow down his eyes, “I came here hoping that I could get as close to an ordinary life as possible, but I realized as soon as I entered the Hogwarts Express that I would never fit in.

I sat with these kids and I… I was completely and utterly humiliated they asked me about my scars and stuff. Then I find out that those same three boys will be in my dorm. Do you know how frightened I am Professor? Potter’s are observational, James will know if something is off about me within the first week and that’s if he hasn’t already. Blacks are known for their sneakiness and their curiosity. If I so much as catch Sirius’ attention even a little, that’ll be it. Pettigrew’s are known for their… for their I really can’t remember but I know it’s not good for me. They will find out eventually Professor and where will that leave me?”

McGonagall had stayed quiet all through his rant, she allowed him to calm down before starting up again. “I am not denying that there will be problems Mr. Lupin because there will be, but wouldn’t you rather give it a try? An education is a very important thing; it shouldn’t be thrown away because of a few small problems.”

Lupin nodded and put his head in his hands, breathing in and out slowly. There was a knock on the door and Remus looked up surprised, “Sirius?” he asked confused, “What’s he doing here this time of the night?”

McGonagall walked up to her door and pulled it open, sure enough the Black heir was standing on the other side. “What do you need Mr. Black?”

Sirius looked nervously at Lupin before answering, “I was worried about Remus, it’s pretty late and he hadn’t come back to the dorm yet. These hallways are pretty hard to get around in the daytime, so I was worried that he had gotten lost. So I thought I would come here and tell you so you could help me find him, but I see that he is already here.” grinning mischievously he said, “In trouble already Lupin?”

Remus smiled slightly, “Something like that. I had better be going now Professor, it’s getting pretty late.”

McGonagall nodded, “See you in class tomorrow.” Lupin nodded his head and headed towards the door. “Oh and Mr. Lupin?”

Lupin turned towards McGonagall, “Yes Professor?”

“Try not to worry, everything will be fine.”

“I’ll try, good night Professor.”

“Good Night, Mr. Lupin.”



The door to McGonagall’s office slammed open and she wiped the tears off her face, “Professor, Professor!” came a out of breath student as he rushed to her desk.

“Yes Lily what is it?”

“Oh Professor its just so horrible! Remus was just brought into the hospital wing, he had blood all over his robes and he was spitting out something silver. Professor Madam Pomphrey said… She said… I can’t say it it’s just so horrible. First Remus leaves us those letters and now this!”

McGonagall looked at Lily confused, before standing up. “Lily what happened?”

“Madam Pomphrey said that he somehow swallowed a huge amount of liquid silver. She said that there was nothing she could do to get it out, that it already did to much damage to his system. Professor Remus is dying!”

McGonagall stood quickly and followed Lily out of her office both running as quickly as they could towards the Hospital wing. They came to a halt when the Hospital wing door slammed open and a flash of black passed them at incredible speed. Regulus came out a second later tears pouring out of his eyes. Lily ran to the smaller boy, “Regulus what happened?”

He shook his head and pushed passed her following the black blur that must have been his brother. “Oh no. “Lily covered her mouth and was shaking her head back and forth, “No. no not Remus, please not Remus! I thought we had more time!” James walked out of the hospital wing tears falling from his eyes, when he saw Lily he shook his head, Peter walked out and James put his arm around him. Severus came out looking sullen and he refused to looked Lily in the eyes. Deciding that Snape looked the calmest McGonagall asked, “What has happened Mr. Snape?”

“Remus is dead.”