InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ 30 Shards - Sesshoumaru and Kagome ❯ Fallen ( Chapter 4 )

Shard # 24 ~ Death

 

Title: Fallen

Pairing: Sesshoumaru/Kagome

Rating: PG

Squicks: None

Summary: Yet another moment after the final battle.

 

 

She closed her eyes, hoping that if she couldn't see that everything else would disappear as well. Instead she was endlessly spinning blindly into a vast abyss of despair. The crater of which left her empty, longing, hoping for one more moment.

 

A moment she would, nor could, ever find. She would always be alone. She could feel it, deep within the recesses of her mind.

 

It was a truth that she could never escape from. No matter how hard she tried, it was one of those things in life that always was. Denying it would accomplish nothing, for when she quit the endless “No, that's not true” 's running through her head, it would still stare her in the face.

 

Oh, to close her eyes and slip into nothingness. To slide into the embracing darkness of death, or coma, and to never awake. To never awake and see that her life would always be as it was. That her dreams of “Happily Ever After” would never apply to her. It was as if she wasn't fit for that type of ending. As if she was paying the fines racked up by someone else.

 

The pain rose again in her chest, engulfing her heart, her lungs, until it twisted them into broken caricatures of their former selves.

 

She had felt herself fall, endlessly towards the ground, desperate to feel his hand once more. To hear his indignant voice cry out and release her own inner demon to quarrel with him, to tell him the depths of her feelings, to show him everything that he would never know now.

 

And instead of the darkness embracing her with cold, icy fingertips trickling along her skin, brightness engulfed her emotionally overwhelmed self. Instead of coarse, unforgiving earth, she was shrouded in silken warmth. She curled towards the firm comforting immersion and finally felt a sense of peace hold her close.

 

She opened her tear-worn eyes and glimpsed a shield of silver hair above her, a crescent moon shining in the daylight of her darkest day and slowly slid into sleep's cool nothingness, comforted, protected, with golden eyes watching over her restless repose.

 

* * *

 

It had been clear to him where her heart had been before and Sesshoumaru prided himself that jealousy, albeit an itch every once in a while, had never really taken hold. He had let himself remain as he always was: aloof, cool and indifferent. Kagome could see through it at times, but never did she know the true reason. He knew that in her mind Rin was always the reason for the kindnesses he would bestow. He never disavowed her of these beliefs, but she was only half right.

 

In the beginning of their strange friendship, he had sought her out because he knew she would never judge him nor mock his reasons. He could tell her without hesitation why he sought her and her friends because of this. It was easy because he had accepted Rin's importance in his life, just like he accepted Jaken's off-beat and often annoying loyalty.

 

It was one of those things that just was.

He hadn't ever accepted his attraction for her. Not really.

 

He had watched with bored eyes and a mind that screamed at Inuyasha for his foolish choice of following his former lover into the depths of hell. He had Kagome still and he threw her away. It was insufferable that Sesshoumaru's blood kin, however tainted it was, would choose to die with a woman who sought his death, instead of live and be with a mate that accepted who he was, even though she was human.

 

It had become quite clear to Sesshoumaru that even though he denied it to himself, that his emotions had a mind of their own. What had just been an attraction for an attractive female, human or otherwise, had turned into something akin to respect and affection. Kagome's kindness towards even one such as he had been just the beginning. Over the year that they had traveled together, she had helped him with his arm when it was still tender. He would never have accepted her help if she hadn't waited until everyone was asleep to address the issue. He would never have accepted it if she hadn't smelled so good and looked so, so. . . Kagome. He had unwillingly given her many secrets to keep and she kept them all. She was honest in her emotions and in everything she did. She hid nothing. With a small uplifting of his lips he doubted if she could hide anything she felt from anyone. But secrets, secrets she could hold onto until her breath left her.

 

And Sesshoumaru reluctantly found that he enjoyed having secrets with her that Inuyasha would never know. It was if those small things created an invisible bond between himself and Kagome, one that would eventually sever the one she held with the hanyou.

 

The stench of Naraku's carcass wrinkled his nose, bringing him out of his thoughts and he turned to escape it in time to see Kagome's eyes close, her body tremble as if a slight breeze might push her over. When her knees bent and she began to crumple to the ground, he deftly caught her in the stronger of his two arms. The acid anger at his half-brother's idiocy rose in his throat as he gently pulled the girl close. She had not passed out, but she was weak from her grief and her loss. The urge to keep her from harm, physical or otherwise, rose high in his breast, settling around his heart. He bent one knee and dropped the other to the ground, placing her on his thigh and bending over her listless form.

 

She had made it through the battle nearly unscathed. She had stood up to he himself how many countless times. She was the glue that had held the crazy group together even when arguments threatened to tear them apart. She was always the one who looked after everyone else. She was the one whose inner strength made any outer flaws insignificant. To Sesshoumaru, that she should fall was illogical. That she had, told him exactly how inured the hanyou had been within her heart. It also told him that even though she knew Inuyasha would go with the other miko when she chose her death, Kagome still held such great hope that it would end differently.

 

He felt her breath against his neck and he looked down at her face. She had the appearance of a woman who was lost in her pain and he felt helpless as his eyes traced the lines of salt that stained her pale cheeks. Her eyes opened to look at him and he held her gaze until she slipped into sleep, her body relaxing against his and turning towards him, her one hand grasping the front of his haori.

 

His heart thundered in his chest.