InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Am I ❯ Am I ( Chapter 1 )

Am I

 

Summary: Kagome has been so many things, for so long, for so many people, that she can hardly remember herself. Who is she? Inu-Kago

 

Disclaimer: All rights to Inuyasha belong to Viz and Rumiko Takahashi.

 

~@~

Most people keep sane by not forgetting who they are, ever.

 

I can't remember.

 

Am I that cute little ninth grader in a green-and-white sailor suit, the one that teachers love? The one who always did her homework, hair, and nails; the girl who studied for every single exam? I think I used to be. Am I now? No, not for some time.

 

Am I, perhaps, the girl that Ami, Eri, and Yuka seem to expect me to be? The perfect friend, who was always, always there for them? At least… until I got `sick.' Until I disappeared. But I didn't - I'm healthier than I every was, and I'm always near. Five hundred years ago or now.

 

Am I, as Inuyasha said, the Lady Kikyou, older sister of the village miko Kaede, protector of the Shikon no Tama, and the miko who sealed the hanyou into the sacred God-Tree? I hated it, but, yes, I am she. No, I was she. No longer. My soul is far larger than hers ever was.

 

Am I the girl from the future who travels the past - neither accepted nor understood in either world? I was that too, once. Now, I have my almost-sister Sango, who understand me. And I have my almost-brother Miroku, whom I understand.

 

Am I the Lady Kagome, the miko who sees and protects the Shikon no Kakera; the companion of the hanyou Inuyasha, the kazanna-cursed houshi Miroku, the taijya Sango, her neko-youkai Kirara, and the kitsune pup Shippou? Am I the `shard-detector,' who leads them to their jewel shards. Yeah. I am. Yet, I'm not. Having mikoki cannot make me a shrine maiden.

 

Did I know who I was before? I think I did… as a child. I'm not sure. I can't see the past so clearly. I cannot see the future at all - mine or others. It'd be nice to know how everything would be. Who will win? Naraku? Us?

 

I stare into our crackling campfire, and at my companions, gathered around it. And I suddenly know who I am. I am not only a student, a friend, a reincarnation, a sister, a time-traveler, a companion, a miko, and a seeker of the Shikon no Tama.

 

Oh, yes, I am - or was - all of those things. But they all merged and evolved into something else. Something bigger. Something better.

 

I am the Lady Kagome Higurashi, and I am the mate of the hanyou I love. The hanyou I have always loved. The hanyou I will always love. The hanyou that I now know loves me back.

 

“Aishiteru, Inuyasha,” my eyes say.

 

“Daisuke, Kagome,” his eyes reply.

 

And I'm so happy, for I know just who I am. And I know to whom I belong. That's all I need.