InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ As Long as Someone Needs Me ❯ Chapter 1 ( Chapter 1 )

As Long as Someone Needs Me

By: Suaru

 

Disclaimer: I don't Inuyasha and co. but I wish I did.

 

-Flashback -Kagome's POV

 

I sat in the dark hut. Everyone around me seemed to be asleep except for the little kit in my lap. He had stopped complaining about nightmares and the fact that he was afraid to go to sleep. We sat in silence. He seemed to take comfort in my mere presents. The little kit snuggled. He looked up and asked me, “You will always stay here won't you Kagome?” He looked at me with such hope in his eyes that I couldn't help but smile. I thought about my answer before I spoke. I didn't know if I would always be there, but I didn't want to hurt Shippo. I didn't want him to feel like I didn't care, because I did. I cared way more than anyone gave me credit for. I ponder my answer for a few more moments then said, “I will be here as long as someone needs me…” My answer seemed to satisfy him and curled up to go to sleep.

I watched him for a few more moments hen turned my gaze to my other companions. The monk slept against one wall on the other side of the hut, while the slayer who was the main focus of his attention slept as far away from him as possible. My last companion slept sitting up closest to the door. The moonlight caught his silver hair and made it glow. If he was awake I would see beautiful amber eyes staring back at me. I rarely get to watch him sleep. He seems so much more peaceful in this state. While he was awake he was always so guarded and distant. But there was no rude comments, no weird looks, nothing…just him… He really is a sweet person but all the horrors he had witnessed had made him cold. I could tell that he has a good heart underneath all that gruffness. And that was why I loved him…

He doesn't know of my love, but I do. I think I might have always loved him, from the first time I saw him. He was bound to the tree, I know now that he was under a spell, but then I thought he was asleep. I don't know when I realized that I loved him, but I know now that I do…but what tears me up inside is the fact that he doesn't love me…he loves Kikyo. And it hurts. It hurts more than I could say. Yet I continue to stay with him. I could never leave. It may sound stupid, but I love him way too much to be without him. It does rip me apart when he goes off to see Kikyo, but I stay with him. It hurts when he says mean things, but I stay with him… Some would wonder why I torture myself, why I stay where I give out love and receive none in return. But in my mind the answer is simple…I love him…

 

-Inuyasha's POV

 

She didn't know, but I was watching her…her and the kit. She has raven hair that falls to her lower back; she has pale skin that looks so soft and smooth, that I have to resist the urge to sit next to her and stroke it. I have never told her but she is so beautiful. And her scent is intoxicating. I feel as if I could go mad if I just take a whiff of it. And on top of all that…she's stubborn as a mule. But I don't mind…it's one of the things that make her the woman I love. Yet I hate myself for loving her. I feel as if I am betraying the other woman that is dear to me, the woman I loved first…the one that I can never forget…Kikyo. They are the same and yet complete opposites. Kagome has so much light and fire to her, while Kikyo is more like ice and stone. I know that I would have to die to be with Kikyo but sometimes I feel like that isn't a problem. Sometimes I think I could do it, spend my death with Kikyo and be with her in hell. But an unknown force keeps me alive, keeps me from doing it…keeps me here.

It's a strange feeling. I don't know how to describe it. It's just odd. Yet it's a warm feeling, and it's kinda nice. I glanced at her, the kit was speaking, “You will always stay her won't you Kagome?” I smirked, like I would let her leave. I peeked at her through the cracks in my eyelids. She seemed to be thinking about her answer. She thought about it so long I wasn't sure she would answer, her eyes flashed from emotion to emotion. Finally she replied, “I will stay as long as someone needs me…” I watched as the kit curl up in her lap and fall asleep. She watched him for a while, her raven hair falling around her face. She slowly looked in the direction Miroku was sleeping, then where Sango was. My heart skipped a beat when she smiled at her friend. She is the most woman when she smiles. Once you see it no matter how pissed you are you have to smile too. I resisted the urge, considering I was “sleeping”. Then she looked at me…I don't think I breathed. She still had a smile on her face…her eyes had a light only a special few possess. I watch her and she watched me. Then my heart cracked.

Her eyes started to fill up with tears, her smiling face turned into a looked of sadness. I wondered if I was the cause of it…of course I was. I'm probably the only person that can put that look on her face. Kami I'm an idiot! But what could she be thinking about? What had I done? She didn't seem to know that she was crying…the tears just rolled down her cheeks. Then she mouthed three words, “I love him…”

 

-End Flashback -Kagome's POV

 

I didn't stop climbing. I refused to give in to the mountain. I wouldn't let anything stop me from achieving my goal. I was going to the top very slowly, then to the bottom very quickly. I was going to end it all that day. All the pain, all the suffering, all of it…it was all coming to an end. All of it was just too much…I had nothing left. My family was gone, my hope was gone, my dreams were dead…and I wanted to be.

Life was meaningless. She had one thing right; my life has no meaning. No one really needed me. He didn't want me… I felt my eyes fill up with tears. “NO!!!” I wasn't going to cry again. It's what she wanted; she enjoyed my pain. And I wasn't gonna give her that pleasure. I saw my dead mother's face. Why did they have to leave me? First my father now everyone else… All the memories of that day came flooding back…

I came home to restock, only to find my home burned to the ground and three white bags lying on the dirt. “Oh my god no…MOM!!!” They were all dead… I never thought it would happen, not to my family. It wouldn't be my little brother his life cut short. It wouldn't be my grandpa and mother wrapped up in a white cloth bag. I fell against a tree, too shocked to cry. Footsteps came toward me. A familiar voice called out my name. “They're all dead Inuyasha…all of them…” He knelt beside me and wrapped his arms around me…”I'm so sorry Kagome. I know how you feel…” I don't know how long I cried into his chest until I fell asleep. The next thing I knew I was being carried into the well house, I didn't complain; at the moment I didn't want anything to do with that world. I hated it for taking my family away from me! It could burn in hell for all I cared. It was evil and cruel!!! I stayed in the past…not wanting to go back and face the memories of that day…

I continued climbing. By this time I had cuts and scrapes all over my body, but it didn't matter. The pain would all be over soon, so why worry? I looked up, I was almost there…it was almost over…

 

-Inuyasha's POV

 

What have I done? What the hell have I done? How could I be so fucking stupid? How could I do that? What in the seven hells was I thinking??? DAMN IT!!! And now she's gone to God knows where and I can't find her!!! FUCK!!! Yea…I'm worried. I'll admit it. She just gave me a look…a look that said that she was gonna do something that would make me regret what I did…FUCK!!! I ran faster. I couldn't stop; I had to find her before she… `You'll get there in time! You have to God damn it!!!'

She didn't even cry when she saw us…she just had raw hurt in her eyes. I instantly knew that it was bad and it was gonna get a lot worst. I could blame Kikyo…I could say it was all her fault, but it wasn't…it was mine. If I didn't go to her, if I wasn't so fucking blind, if I had just told Kagome how I felt, if I had just said it was over…if I just said three little words then… But it was too late. Damn it to hell!!! I'm an ass!!! I'm a stupid ass!!! FUCK IT!!! FUCK IT ALL!!! I have to find her and soon. Who the hell knows what she's gotten into! Why did I do it? Why did I kiss her? How could I kiss Kikyo!!! She's dead and I don't want to be…I can't be with her and I know now that I don't want to be. I want to be with someone I don't deserve. A girl that should have someone better; someone pure…someone else, not me. Besides she doesn't love me…why would she? I've done nothing but push her away, be cruel and mean. All because I was afraid…afraid to love and to be loved… I wasn't always like this…but all the hardships in my life made me cold. All the tragedies in my life made me distant…

I caught a whiff of her scent. Yes! It's resent…she's not that far away! I'm going to find her…she's gonna be all right! I ran, my legs ached, but I still ran…following her scent. My heart sank, if possible, even lower as I reach the mountain…her scent was laced with blood, and she was almost to the top!!! I might not reach her in time!!! I leaped onto the mountain and bolted upward. Now I was determined!!! I was gonna reach her if it was the last thing I did!!! I just had to tell her…she had to know…

 

-Kagome's POV

 

Almost there…I'm almost there. This is almost over. It's all coming to an end. I had been climbing for what seemed like hours. But it would all be worth it. I let out bitter smile, he probably doesn't even know that I'm gone, or if he does he doesn't care. And I don't care; I hope he'll be very happy in hell with his corps; with my dead look-alike. I could feel the hatred seeping into my eyes. I started climbing faster that before. I wanted to get it over with…I wanted it to be finished, before anyone has a chance to stop me. I smirked. Not that they would.

There…I was at the top. I stood up and wiped the dirt off my hands and onto my pants. I looked up at the sky, “Mom, Dad, Grandpa, Sota…I'm coming. I'm coming to join you. I miss you so much! I want to see you again…thank-you for waiting for me. I'll be there in a minute. I won't take long, promise. Please forgive for taking the easy way out, but I have nothing left…” A few tears spilled out of my eyes. “No one needs me so why bother staying? Besides I've always wanted to know what happen after you die…and now I'll know.” A small laugh escaped my lips. “Remember when I asked you about it Dad? At first you were so quiet, then you wouldn't shut-up…Mom's right, you're so much like Grandpa…” I closed my eyes fighting back tears. I stepped up to the edge and looked down. I couldn't believe I climbed up so high. I whispered a small good-bye to the cruel would that I was finally able to leave behind. I took a deep breath and jumped…

(A/N: Should I stop it here and make it a two chappie one-shot? ::plugs ears from the loud, “NO!!!”:: Ok…ok. I won't stop…don't hurt me…)

 

-Inuyasha's POV

 

So close… I'm so close. I can see her. She's just staring at the sky, I saw her lips move and as I got closer I could hear her words, ”…please forgive me for taking the easy way out, but I have nothing left…” Tears actually welled up in my eyes. I did this to her…how could I be such an idiot? Fucking up my own life is fine, to fuck up hers??? Damn it to hell!!! I put on another burst of speed. Almost there…I'm almost there…there…

Yes…NO!!! She was stepping up to the edge. She was gonna jump!!! FUCK!!! I ran toward her. She took a deep breath and prepared to jump…”NO!!!” I grabbed her. I snatched her right out of the air. I held her close to me. She struggled for a moment then stopped. “Inu…Inuyasha?” She turned to look at me. Her eyes filled with unshed tears. “Let me go.” She said it so calmly, but with so much force behind it…but I didn't even loosen my grip. “Let me go.” I didn't move. “Let me go!” Her voice was much louder. “LET ME GO GOD DAMN IT!!!” If all of Japan didn't hear her, I would have been surprised.

“No.” That answer did not please her. She started pounding my arms, screaming, “Fuck you!!! Let me go now!!!” I didn't give in. I simply walk away from the edge, not once letting go of her. She let out a string of curses, I smirked, she sounded like me…

 

-No one's POV

 

Now Kagome was both pissed and confused. He wasn't supposed to care, why was he stopping her? Inuyasha turned her in his arms so he could look at her, but he still had a hold on her arms. “I'm not gonna let you do it…”

“And why not???”

His ears couldn't take much more of this. “Because…”

“That's not an answer Inuyasha! Now, TELL ME WHY!!!”

Shit that was loud…”Because…” He didn't know how to answer her, should he tell her how I feel?

“Answer me God damn it!!! No one needs me so why should I stay???” She was really pissed. Inuyasha had never seen her like this.

He took a deep breath. “You're wrong…”

“What? How am I wrong?”

“You said that no one need you, well that's not true…I need you…” She was shocked to say the least. “Wha-?” “ I need you now and I always will…I love you Kagome…”

 

-Kagome's POV

 

What did he say? How? Why? Why hasn't he told me before? All I wanted to do was to tell him how much I loved him, but the words wouldn't come out…the streams of tears that leaked out of eyes soon turned into waterfalls. He held me close to him as I cried. It felt so good to be in his arms…so right. He whispered soothing words in my ear and rubbed my back lightly. I tried to tell him how I felt but all that came out was a hick-up. “Shhh…” He whispered. “It's ok… It's ok…Cry all you want, you have every right to, after what I did… I'm sorry. I know it's doesn't mean much but I'm really, really sorry. I'm such an idiot…I wouldn't blame you if you hated me… Hell I hate me…” I could believe it; he was being so considerate. He said I could hate him, he said he hated himself… “I…I…” It was caught in my throat; I just couldn't seem to get the words out. I loved him so much yet I couldn't tell him. I slowly calmed myself down. I wanted to tell him…I needed to tell him. I took a few deep breaths then I whisper into his chest, “I love you too, Inuyasha…”

 

-Inuyasha's POV

 

“I love you too, Inuyasha…” Those words were music to my ears. She loved me, even after all that I did, she loved me. Everything was so right…so perfect. I swear if anything fucks this up it will die a very slow, very painful death. I pulled her closer and kissed the top of her head. “I thought you hated me Inu… Why didn't you tell me?” That stung to say the least. How could I hate her? She is the most beautiful, the most kind, and the sweetest woman in the world! How could anyone hate her?

“I don't hate you. I could never hate you… I was…I was…” This was so hard to say. I had never admitted to any that I was afraid to do something. I felt her lips on my neck and it gave me hope that she would understand. “I was afraid that you didn't feel the same way about me…I just didn't want to get hurt again… I didn't want to part with someone else I love… I…”

“Shh…it's ok. I understand. You don't need to worry. I love you and I always will…”

 

No one's POV

 

Inuyasha pulled away slightly and lifted her chin so her could look into her eyes. She was the most beautiful creature in the world. He leaned forward slowly, asking permission. He got his answer when warm soft lips pressed against his. She opened her mouth slightly and he slipped in, moving across her lips, almost teasing her. She wrapped her arms around his neck pulling him closer to her. She could feel his hands stroking her back and chest. They pulled back out of a need to breathe, but came back instantly, as if the would die without the other's touch.

A cold wind wrapped around them making Kagome shiver. “Here…” Inuyasha handed her his haori. She slipped it around her shoulders. “Thank-you…” She said quietly. The hanyou picked her up bridal-style and proceeded to jump down the mountain. The girl snuggled closer to him, a soft smile on her face. Neither was thinking about the problems their future would hold, but what ever it was they would face it…together…

 

Author's note: So…what did you guys think? It was an interesting writing experience…I've never really done that much with different character's POVs. It was fun! Anyway…review, review, review!!! I want to know what you people think!!!

R&R!!! Until next time!!!

Suaru