InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ To Tell The Truth... ❯ ...The Whole Truth... ( Chapter 1 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
Blanket Disclaimer:
Inuyasha, and the characters therein, are the property of Rumiko Takahashi. I am in no way affiliated with Takahashi, or VIZ Productions.
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Nominated for Best Lemon, IYFG, 1st Quarter 2010
Winner!!! 3rd Place for Best Inu/Kag Romance, Feudal Association, 1st Quarter 2011
A/N:
This story takes place earlier in the timeline during what I used to call the ‘randomly generated anime episode’ time period, though I guess I will have to come up with a new name since they have since completed the rest of the story in anime format, but that’s neither here nor there. Just for a basic point of reference, for the purposes of this story, they are currently still searching for jewel shards as well as hunting Naraku, which means that Kikyou is of course still alive, and that Kouga is still showing up at random to proclaim his love for Kagome. Please suspend disbelief with regard to the off-canon nature of this supposedly canon story, and enjoy!
Chapter 1 – ...The Whole Truth…
“I see…so you, the hanyou, the houshi, the taijiya and the kitsune are all working together to hunt down Naraku and complete the Shikon no Tama.” the village priest repeated, nodding his head sagely as he recalled hearing many tales in recent months of a strange group of travelers that were seeking the scattered shards of the sacred jewel.
Descriptions of precisely who made up that group of individuals seemed to vary depending on whom you asked, so he hadn’t immediately recognized Kagome’s group for who they were when they had first entered his village earlier that morning.
“Yes, exactly.” the future-born miko replied, at first having felt terrified to feel the effects of his ‘truth tea’, but since feeling more relaxed as she realized this man was fighting on the side of good, and that he truly meant no harm to either her or her friends.
Unfortunately, there had been recent rumors of a group of bandits that roughly matched their description, the group consisting of both men and women with at least one youkai. What were the odds? But Kagome couldn’t rightfully blame the man for wanting to protect his village. When they had first attempted to reason with the village headman regarding their true intentions, the priest had stepped forward and asked boldly if any of them would willingly submit to drinking his tea of truth, calling upon Kagome to be the one before any of them had even had a chance to respond. Thinking back on it, she could still hear Inuyasha cursing in her head even now, when he had basically ordered her to not drink anything the priest gave to her. But they would’ve been found guilty otherwise! She hadn’t had a choice! Miroku had uttered quietly that he was familiar with the potion the village priest spoke of, assuring her that it was both legitimate and harmless, and so to save everyone, including herself, the future-born-miko had conceded to taking the Feudal era’s equivalent of a lie detector test.
Having feared that the monk and slayer robes of Miroku and Sango were meant as a deception, and finding Kagome’s own outfit completely bizarre and more than a little inappropriate, the village priest had been downright convinced that these people were indeed the traveling bandits, until Kagome’s story had proven otherwise. While under the influence of his potion, the girl was not only incapable of lying, but she was actually urged to answer any and all questions asked upon her, so simply remaining silent wasn’t an option, either, as fully honest answers were given to every one of his questions.
Realizing in that moment that she was the reincarnation of the guardian of the Shikon no Tama, and that she was on a holy mission blessed by the kami – how else could you really explain the magic of the Bone Eater’s Well? – the priest immediately sent Kagome and her friends on their way with humble apologies for the mistake, as well as his vow to never tell a soul of the important secrets he had learned.
“Feh…unless someone makes you drink that fucking tea…” Inuyasha muttered under his breath, while Miroku spoke with the village headman about rumors of a youkai disturbance in a neighboring village that might involve a Shikon shard.
“Come on, let’s get the hell out of here.” Inuyasha spoke up after Miroku told him of the possible lead.
“No complaints here.” Sango stated in compliance, the youkai exterminator not having appreciated being confused for an honorless criminal wearing a knockoff of the taijiya uniform.
“Miko-sama, one word of caution.” the priest spoke up as they were moving to depart. “Speak cautiously. The tea’s effects shall last until morning.”
Just fucking great… Inuyasha thought, dreading the idea of some random youkai showing up and asking her point blank where their jewel shards were.
“Should we just stay here for the night, until the tea wears off?” Shippou asked in that moment, but the child’s logic was dismissed when Inuyasha snorted, stating despite his own concerns, “We need to get a move on. Especially if there is a youkai near the next village that might have a jewel shard.”
Smirking, Miroku turned to the miko beside him in that moment, and asked, “What do you think, Kagome-sama?”
Kagome smiled before answering the houshi truthfully. “I actually agree with Inuyasha.” she stated. “If there is a chance of getting another jewel shard, not to mention stopping a dangerous youkai before it causes any more damage, then we shouldn’t wait around just for the effects of the tea to wear off.”
Inuyasha was somewhat taken aback. Kagome actually agreed with him? It seemed like they almost always fought over that sort of thing, and he could usually tell that whenever she did agree with him, it was merely to avoid a fight, not that she actually agreed.
But she really does agree with me this time, because she has to tell the truth right now… he knew. Huh…he realized after a moment. Maybe this won’t be so bad, after all.
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Ugh, if I had known it was going to be this bad, I would have wanted to stay in the village until tomorrow… Kagome grumbled to herself, before an idea struck her and she tried a little experiment. I absolutely love all of Inuyasha’s questions…she thought without sarcasm lacing her tone, realizing, Huh, looks like I can still lie in my thoughts, all the good that does me.
“So what do you like about my ears?” he asked her in that moment, and she rolled her eyes. Is this guy for real?
It was time to get even.
“I think they’re cute.” the miko answered matter-of-factly, snickering to herself at the light dusting of pink that instantly appeared on Inuyasha’s cheeks and nose with her latest answer.
That’s what he gets… she thought in amusement, satisfied to finally have the tables of embarrassment turned around.
It had all started out innocently enough.
In light of her agreeing with his decision to get back out on the road again, the hanyou had asked her, despite knowing of the effects of the tea, if she had really meant what she’d said. Just to make her repeat it, no doubt.
“Do you really agree with me?” had been his actual question.
Kagome hadn’t caught on, at first, and had readily answered that yes, she did indeed agree that it was best to put a stop to that attacking youkai as quickly as possible. She had actually been a little hurt, at first. Had he really thought that she would be so self-conscious that she’d rather hide out in the relative safety of the village until the effects of the tea wore off, even at the possible cost of people’s lives? The tea didn’t prevent Kagome from speaking her own mind, so long as her words were truthful, and so she’d let him have it for being surprised by her amount of consideration for other people. He should know her by now, damn it!
Having fully expected an argument, Kagome had been mildly surprised when Inuyasha had appeared to hold his tongue, a light dusting of pink gracing his cheeks before he snapped his gaze away from her as he proceeded to march down the trail to the next village. Of course, Kagome had eventually realized that what Inuyasha had actually been surprised about had been her simple admittance to having agreed with him, regardless of the subject matter, instead of arguing simply for the sake of arguing, which was apparently what he usually thought she was doing whenever she disagreed with something he said. So she had eventually apologized, confessing that she shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions so quickly, as she reiterated for the third time that yes, she did agree with him, while also issuing forth another light apology for all of the times they usually fought. She didn’t like to argue simply for the sake of arguing, but sometimes, part of her might agree with him while another part of her wouldn’t, and so she had to stick to her guns, even if part of her understood where he was coming from. In return, he had miraculously apologized to her as well, for the misunderstanding, because he hadn’t meant for her to take his question the way she had, as if she were possibly capable of being selfish enough to put herself before the welfare of others. She was too damn caring for something like that. Warmth had bubbled up in her chest at his words…
It had all gone downhill from there.
His sudden question of “What else do you actually agree with me about, at least in part?” had led to her reluctant admittance of knowing that finding the jewel shards and defeating Naraku were more important, on the grand scale of things, than her grades at school.
That confession had of course triggered a string of questions regarding why she always insisted, then, that she had to make it back home in time for her ‘stupid tests’, which had then caused Kagome to launch into a rather detailed description of the schooling system in her time, and how it was important to her and her family that she not bring them any dishonor by failing to get into high school. Yes, saving lives was more important than her own honor. Of course it was! But that didn’t mean that school wasn’t still important in its own right, and she really needed to see if she could continue juggling both. If it ever came down to actually being forced to choose, of course she would aid in a battle against Naraku before abandoning her friends to go take a test at school, but so far, her returning home for her schoolwork had never been a life or death decision.
Inuyasha’s eyes had actually softened a little after that conversation had ended, Kagome’s schooling having finally been put into perspective in a way that he could understand. While he still didn’t really understand, he could at least accept that it was a matter of honor, and to know that her responsibilities in his time with the jewel and Naraku were putting her and her family’s honor at stake back in her own world had caused the hanyou to feel a bit of sympathy for the girl. His questioning had stopped…for a little while.
Then it had been time to eat lunch.
Halfway through slurping his noodles Inuyasha had paused, remembering something that Kagome usually complained about. Noting how surprisingly quiet she was being in that moment had only made him more suspicious.
His sudden question of “Do you really think I eat like a pig?” had immediately led to her clipped answer of, “Yes, I do.”
Kagome had been bound and determined to keep her answers as short as possible, especially if another round of twenty-questions was about to get underway.
“Does it bother you that I eat like a pig?”
“Not really.”
“Why?”
“It’s understandable.”
“Why is it understandable?”
“Considering the life you’ve had to live, I can’t blame you for instinctively eating your food as quickly as possible.”
At least she had managed to answer that question without mentioning anything about canine instincts. He never appreciated being compared to a dog.
Intrigued by her answer, especially considering that no one had ever shown him any sort of sympathy or understanding before, Inuyasha had then asked the miko, “What else is understandable, considering the life I’ve had to live?”
At that point, Miroku and Sango had started exchanging silent glances back and forth between the hanyou and miko, like watching a tennis match. They both wondered how far Inuyasha planned on taking his dangerous game, and how long Kagome would play along before she realized that the tea did not hinder her ability to osuwari him.
At his latest question, the miko had confessed that she couldn’t really blame him for his untrusting nature, or his harsh, somewhat crude behavior when it came to interacting with other people. His chest had almost seemed to puff with pride at her words, as if her excusing his behavior as understandable had actually been a complement of some sort. Of course, it hadn’t taken long to dawn on the taijiya and houshi that Kagome’s words probably had been taken as a compliment from Inuyasha’s point of view. Not that he necessarily felt vindicated for behaving the way he did, but more simply, that she had not accused his crass nature on his hanyou status. It was because he was a jaded outcast that he acted the way he did, not because he was a vile monster incapable of higher intelligence.
“Keh.”
Kagome had breathed a sigh of relief, believing his current line of questioning to be over, but her reprieve was proven short-lived when he suddenly asked her, “So what do you like about me?”
Sango had groaned, while Miroku did his best not to snicker out loud. Shippou had shared a glance with Kirara before getting back to his own lunch, the kitsune child having decided that he was no longer interested in their conversation if it was just going to be about Inuyasha from that point onward.
With a nice rosy hue of pink staining her cheeks, Kagome had begun listing off Inuyasha’s various strong points, in that he was physically strong, determined, brave…well you get the idea.
Inuyasha 1, Kagome 0
It had dawned on Kagome during all of this, however, that so long as the question was vague enough, she still had some measure of control over how she answered, so long as she was truthful and also not deliberately attempting to omit something important she had thought of in the forefront of her mind. She had already experimented earlier in the day with trying to tell a lie, and the act was like pushing against an invisible force field. She would pause in her speech, temporarily unable to say anything at all as the words she had attempted to speak were plucked from her throat. But remaining silent entirely wasn’t an option, either, she knew, as the longer she attempted to hold her mouth closed, the more holding her words in began to feel like holding her breath. The moment would inevitably come when she simply had to say something. However, knowing that when she didn’t resist answering the questions asked upon her, she was then given a marginal amount of control with regard to her answers, depending on the nature of the question, it was in that moment that Kagome decided to have a little fun.
It was with that last thought in mind that Kagome had deliberately added his ears to her list of things she liked about him, figuring that the embarrassment he would feel at her mention of the appendages she knew he didn’t much care for would outrank any embarrassment she might feel herself for having said it in the first place. Sending a playful wink Sango and Miroku’s way when Inuyasha wasn’t looking had let her friends know that the final item on her list had been added on purpose, and the monk had smirked in his own amusement while the taijiya had merely continued to shake her head in disbelief over how juvenile their hanyou friend was acting, given Kagome’s present condition. Sango just hoped the miko knew what she was doing.
Inuyasha hadn’t taken the bait, at first, asking Kagome to elaborate in other aspects of his character, which she had become happier to do once it’d dawned on her that Inuyasha had actually seemed almost desperate for the reaffirmation of his self-worth. Was it really that he had honestly believed she’d thought so little of him, or more that he truly thought so little of himself? But soon enough she’d finally gotten what she’d wanted, and seeing him turn away in embarrassment in that moment as his questioning suddenly came to a halt, the miko did a little mental happy-dance while evening out the tally in her mind.
Inuyasha 1, Kagome 1
Inuyasha was, in fact, dumbstruck and honored to hear some of the things Kagome actually thought about him, her admittances filling him with a sense of pride that almost felt foreign after being told he was nothing and worthless for most of his life. When he’d first asked her what she liked about his ears, he had honestly expected her to say something in regard to how keen his sense of hearing was, figuring that despite their appearance, she appreciated them for their functionality in that regard. He had not been expecting her to call his ears cute!
F-feh! Stupid wench, she said that on purpose just to mess with me, the hanyou realized as he caught the way Kagome was winking at their snickering friends. Still…despite saying it on purpose to embarrass him, Inuyasha did remain aware of the fact that in order for her to have said it at all, it still had to be the truth. She really thinks they’re cute…?
“You are playing with fire.” Inuyasha heard Miroku whisper in an amused tone of warning to Kagome, and he scoffed at the lecher’s concerns.
It hadn’t been his goal to see how badly he could embarrass the girl, and the monk had better not start asking her anything perverted or else he wouldn’t hesitate to knock the bastard unconscious until the effects of the tea were completely clear from her system. Realizing that he had still managed to embarrass Kagome, though, Inuyasha figured that they were probably even with her little comment about his ears, and quickly decided to change the subject before he ended up saying something that would renew his acquaintanceship with the ground.
“So…wench…what all do you actually study at that ‘school’ thing of yours?”
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Entering the quiet, victimized village later that afternoon, Kagome still had a slight smile on her face, truly touched by Inuyasha’s efforts to no longer take advantage of the effects of the tea. He didn’t give a rat’s ass about her schooling and you would never be able to convince her otherwise, but asking her such a question had been his way of apologizing for his earlier behavior, and she had forgiven him, of course. As was evidenced by the way she was currently riding on his back.
While Inuyasha suspected that the miko on his back had forgiven him for earlier, he refused to ask her directly, wishing to avoid bringing up what a baka he had been. After managing to get back on her good side, Inuyasha had actually refrained from asking Kagome any additional questions at all, except for simple things like if she wanted to stop yet or if she could continue to travel further. He wanted to hear that answer. Finally, the girl wouldn’t be able to utterly exhaust herself by refusing to appear weak in his eyes.
Kagome had been unable to hide it when her feet had started bothering her, her quiet admittance resulting in finishing off the last mile of travel riding on Inuyasha’s back, and that was cause for another, somewhat larger smile to grace the miko’s lips in that moment, knowing that her hanyou companion would not see it as she was currently still riding upon his back as they entered the desolate village that had recently fallen victim to numerous youkai attacks. At least according to the previous village.
Those rumors turned out to be true when, after some mild investigating, Inuyasha revealed that he could definitely detect the stench of reptilian youkai. Placing Kagome back on her feet, Inuyasha dropped to the ground, looking for the freshest scent trail, and then he was off. Her feet having been given a chance to rest, Kagome could easily keep up as everyone followed after Inuyasha in that moment, the inu-hanyou following his nose to an ugly beast that was presently lurking just outside the village’s borders.
As soon as the strangers were gone, frightened villagers began peaking their heads out of what few buildings remained standing, hoping that the conversation they had overheard was legitimate, and that the strangers were in fact there to help them by slaying the youkai.
Coming face to face with the beast in question not five minutes later, the inu-tachi sized the creature up before unanimously deciding that the low-level youkai was truly no threat to hunters of their skill-level, the jewel shard currently resting in its belly being the only thing that gave the weakling any strength at all. One thing was quickly proven to be a threat to them, however.
“Yoooouuuuu havvvvve jeeeeewwwllll ssssssssshhhhardsssszzzzz” the beast hissed, surprising Inuyasha, who honestly hadn’t been expecting the overgrown gecko to be able to talk.
Eyeing Kagome directly, the lizard-youkai garbled out, “Whhhheeerrrrrrrrreee arrrrree thhhheeeyyyy?”
Unable to avoid answering the question, Kagome closed her eyes and tried her hardest to fight the spell, but eventually rasped out, “In…a…bot…tle a…round my…neck.”
“Damn it all!” Inuyasha bellowed immediately.
“I’m sorry!” Kagome cried, her hands rushing to the bottle as if in an extra attempt to protect it from imminent attack.
Shit…Sango mentally cursed, aiming her giant boomerang in the hope of decapitating the rapidly approaching youkai in one solid swing. Why couldn’t it have just demanded we hand the shards over? That’s not a question… the slayer grumbled to herself as she released her weapon with a fearsome cry of “Hiraikotsu!”
The tokage was surprisingly quick on its feet, however, as it easily dodged Sango’s weapon, proving itself to be somewhat of a greater threat than they had originally believed. It didn’t take long for the reptile to close the remaining distance between itself and the temporarily distracted miko.
“Oh no you don’t!” Inuyasha hollered in that moment, coming down in front of Kagome with the transformed Tetsusaiga descending on a powerful swing.
Jumping back to avoid decapitation a second time, the lizard-youkai rose up onto its hind legs before rapidly swinging its body around, hoping to hit Inuyasha with its giant tail. Fortunately, the hanyou realized what the gecko was doing, and quickly grabbed Kagome before leaping out of the way.
“It’s fast, but its youki is weak.” Inuyasha whispered into the girl’s ear, not knowing the lizard’s strength of hearing but not willing to take any chances. “I’ll distract it. Ready an arrow.”
Nodding her understanding while trying to get her shaky breathing back under control, Kagome did as Inuyasha asked while he rushed off to get the youkai’s attention away from her.
“Hey, ugly!” he bellowed, holding up a closed fist. “I’ve got the jewel shards, now. What’re ya gonna do about it?”
His words made the miko raise an uncertain hand to her chest, only to discover that her bottle of shards was still hanging in place around her neck; Inuyasha was lying.
What a wonderful ability to possess.
Shaking such negative thoughts free from her mind, the miko knew she needed to redeem herself by not missing this shot. The lizard youkai was weak enough that it would take it a moment to sense that the shards were still with her, so in that single moment, as it stood trying to determine whether or not the hanyou really had the shards now, Kagome took her chance.
Hit the mark! she shouted in her mind, holding her breath.
The tokage sensed her approaching arrow too late, turning its head just in time for its eyes to widen in surprise before her arrow pierced its throat, the gecko-youkai disappearing into sparkly dust as a purified jewel shard dropped to the ground.
“She did it!” Shippou cried happily, the boy’s words mirroring the rest of the inu-gang’s thoughts.
Walking forward to collect their latest jewel shard, Kagome offered Inuyasha a brief, apologetic look for her earlier tea-induced slipup, before turning to address everyone as she stated, “Well, I suppose the villagers should be told that the youkai has been taken care of.”
“Yes,” Miroku agreed in that moment, adding, “It would be irresponsible of us to allow them to continue needlessly living in fear.”
“You guys better go on without me, though.” Kagome said then, passing a quick glance in Inuyasha’s direction before shifting her gaze to focus on Sango and Miroku. She knew there was no way the hanyou would ever leave her in the woods by herself, so her words were basically directed towards the houshi and taijiya as she added, “Wouldn’t want to risk somebody asking me something I shouldn’t answer.”
“Oh, Kagome-chan…” Sango said softly in understanding.
She wanted to argue against the miko’s worries, but truly, the youkai exterminator knew that her friend was right. Even a seemingly innocent question like asking her where she had come across such a bizarre kimono would likely trigger an answer involving secrets that really shouldn’t be told.
“We’ll be quick.” Miroku spoke up after a moment, a silent glance passed between himself and the slayer confirming that both he and Sango had similar thoughts.
Watching them walk away through the trees, Kagome stared after them for a moment before shifting her gaze to glance in Inuyasha’s direction, only to note how he was staring off in another direction entirely. What Kagome had missed seeing was the way he had been staring directly at her, only to quickly look away when she’d started to turn her head in his direction.
Sensing the awkwardness developing between the miko and hanyou, Shippou spoke up in that moment with, “Don’t worry, Kagome. We all know you couldn’t help saying what you did, and the tea will wear off really soon!”
Smiling a somewhat forlorn, yet appreciative smile, Kagome nodded her thanks to the young boy. “That’s right. It will, won’t it?” she agreed in a soft tone, chancing another glance in Inuyasha’s direction only to see him continuing to ignore her.
Tomorrow morning can’t get here fast enough… she thought dejectedly.
The rest of the afternoon and evening passed by without much incident, the inu-tachi having decided to head north after the rescued village had no information to offer as far as any potential new leads. After politely declining the villagers’ offer for free room and board as payment for slaying the gecko-youkai, Miroku had managed to sweet talk their way into payment in the form of food, so dinner would be taken care of that night without the need to worry over hunting or fishing.
Setting up camp for the night was fairly routine, with Sango working to build up their campfire while Miroku gathered additional firewood to last them throughout the night. Inuyasha and Kirara both broke off to scout around the immediate area checking for threats, of which they thankfully found none. Kagome figured she might as well try to get a few minutes of studying in, like she usually did, although the miko didn’t feel opposed to the idea of engaging the others in conversation. Truth be told, and there was no way around that for the moment, Kagome appreciated her friends’ consideration, but found it unnecessary. She would admit that she had been a little nervous back in the beginning, mainly worried that Miroku might’ve started asking her inappropriate questions, but she was pretty sure that a glare from either Sango or Inuyasha, or both, had stilled the houshi’s tongue in that regard. Aside from that single concern, there was really no reason to fear chatting with her friends. She had always been a fairly honest person, after all, so how much difference could the truth tea really make?
She had her answer when the companionable silence after dinner was suddenly broken by Shippou’s young voice commenting “Look!”
There, towards the east, shimmering in between the dark trees of the forest was the unmistakable glow of several shinidamachuu. Miroku and Sango both stiffened at the sight, and the steady silence around camp went from comfortable to awkward in an instant. Casting a quick glance in Kagome’s direction, the hanyou’s ‘cute’ ears lowered regretfully against his head, as Inuyasha silently stood up, his eyes reflecting his apologies as he prepared to respond to his former love’s summons.
This wasn’t right. Something had to be done. This was the perfect opportunity, and if nobody else was going to take advantage of it, then he would.
“Kagome! Why don’t you say something!?” Shippou bellowed, Inuyasha freezing in his tracks as a collective gasp could be heard among the other members of camp.
“It isn’t my place to say anything, Shippou-chan.” Kagome answered quietly, refusing to meet anyone’s eyes as she stared at her own feet.
Part of Inuyasha wanted to make a run for it before things got any worse. Another part of him desperately wanted to close the gap between himself and the future-born-miko, doing whatever was in his power to make the sadness in her scent go away. He knew she hated it whenever he left to see Kikyou, but…
“But why?” the kitsune whined in that moment.
“Shippou…leave it alone.” Miroku stated with no small measure of authority, but the fox-child refused to be swayed.
“Because Inuyasha and Kikyou have a history together that can never be changed, and he has every right to visit with her whenever he wishes.” Kagome answered the kit, raising her head to narrow her eyes at the boy when it became apparent to her what Shippou was really up to. If he managed to ask her the right question…
“So you really don’t mind?!” the boy asked incredulously, revealing he was far more observant when it came to adult matters than any of them had ever given him credit for. He knew quite well of her feelings for the hanyou.
“Shippou!” Sango scolded, but it was already too late.
Please don’t make me say it… Kagome begged both of Shippou as well as her own traitorous tongue.
“Of course I mind.” she answered, her words more bitter than she had intended.
Inuyasha felt like he had been slapped. Never before had he heard Kagome use such a tone of voice, at least not in regard to himself in any way. Yes, he had already known that it bothered her whenever he left to see Kikyou, but like she had just admitted, herself, it wasn’t really her place to say anything on the matter. Still, the hanyou couldn’t help but to feel guilty for the pain he was obviously causing her, so against his better judgment, he spoke up himself in that moment.
“Kagome…don’t be like this.” he murmured softly, pleading with his eyes for her to understand.
Her eyes narrowed further.
“Be like what? Honest? Can’t help it right now, in case you haven’t noticed.” she snapped, before her own eyes softened in apology at the hurt look that splashed across his face.
“I’m sorry…” she apologized with honest regret for not holding her tongue, unable to tell him that she hadn’t mean what she’d said, because she had, and he knew it. “Just…go. Kikyou is waiting for you.”
“And you hate it.” the hanyou supplied.
It wasn’t stated in question form, but Kagome still answered nonetheless, lowering her gaze before whispering so quietly that only demonic ears could hear her, “Yes…”
Inuyasha wanted to ask her why, but thought better of it, pretty sure he knew the answer, and very sure that Kagome wouldn’t appreciate him forcing her to admit it aloud. Unfortunately, they had both temporarily forgotten about the not-so-innocent kitsune.
“Then why do you always do this to yourself, Kagome?” Shippou asked softly, all the while wondering if it would really do any good. If that baka was too insensitive to already know how it hurt Kagome whenever he ditched her to go see that walking corpse, then hearing her say it now probably wouldn’t change a damn thing.
On the other side of the campfire, Miroku, Sango, and even Kirara were holding their breaths for what was about to happen.
Mind scrambling, Kagome realized with a growing sense of panic that there was simply nothing else she could say that would be any more honest than the one, true answer.
“Because I love him.” she stated matter-of-factly, quickly deciding in that moment that if she was going to go down, then she might as well do it with whatever little pride she had left, as she lifted her head to meet Inuyasha’s gaze head-on. “And he loves Kikyou.” she added solemnly, before immediately turning to fix her gaze on the kitsune.
“Now,” she stated with slow, deadly precision, “If you are quite done meddling in adult matters that do not concern you, go to bed. Perhaps two weeks without any candy will do you some good.”
Shippou wanted to whine like the little boy he was at the prospect of having his pockey and lollypops taken away for two whole weeks, but quickly thought better of it, casting a sidelong glance in Inuyasha’s direction. Shippou caught what Kagome had failed to notice, as she’d immediately turned her gaze away from the hanyou upon her statement about his feelings for Kikyou. The look in Inuyasha’s eyes could only be described as surprise mixed with confusion, and it was clear he wanted to say something further, but was arguing with himself over whether or not he should.
“Okay, Kagome…” Shippou mumbled in that moment, complying with her command as he crawled into bed without saying anything further.
Inuyasha was surprised, and he was confused.
While it had turned out that he had been correct in his assumption regarding why it really bothered Kagome whenever he left to see Kikyou, hearing the second half of her reasoning for why she’d never before said anything on the subject had promptly thrown him for a loop. Sure, Inuyasha knew that Kagome had feelings for him. It was kind of obvious, wasn’t it? But he had thought she’d known that he felt the same way! It was his obligation to Kikyou that prevented anything from developing between himself and the future-born-miko, because he owed her his life for what had happened to her, not because he still had feelings for her. Well…in a way, of course he still had some feelings for Kikyou. You never stoped loving your first love, not entirely. But if it weren’t for his vow to join her in Hell, if that was their fate, then he would’ve openly proclaimed his feelings for Kagome a long time ago. He was simply bound to Kikyou by honor, and unless the undead miko released him from his vow of dying with her, there was really nothing he could do about it. He knew Kagome knew of his vow to die with Kikyou, and he knew that it bothered her because of her desire for the two of them to be together, knowing it could never be…but was it really possible that she also thought the only reason he’d made such a vow in the first place was because of some continued unending love for Kikyou? Was it really possible that Kagome thought that she herself meant nothing to him?
Inuyasha was just getting ready to open his mouth to speak when a shinidamachuu chose that exact moment to slither into camp, circling itself around his torso before floating off the way it’d come. Somebody was getting impatient.
“You better not keep Kikyou waiting.” Kagome said in that moment, though her tone of voice was falsely cheery rather than snide.
Clearly wanting to argue, Inuyasha’s body twitched forward in Kagome’s direction before he stopped himself, his ears having sprung up merely to lower once more.
“We need to talk about this.” he stated quietly, but loud enough to ensure she heard him, before he quickly turned and bound off through the trees in the direction of the soul collectors.
I have no desire to hear you lecture me about how I’m just a foolish girl and I need to get over you… Kagome thought bitterly, before turning smiling eyes towards Sango.
“Well, I think it would probably be best if I go home, at least until the tea wears off, ne?” she asked with a forced chuckle.
The slayer immediately picked up on the obvious hint, and with a quietly ordered “Kirara…” the fire-cat was roaring into full-size, ready to take the fifteen-year-old to the Bone Eater’s Well.
Miroku, having also noticed something in Inuyasha’s expression while Kagome had refused to make eye contact with the hanyou, spoke up in that moment with, “Have faith. All may not be as dire as it appears.”
“Thanks…” Kagome answered disbelievingly, before Kirara took to the skies.
``````````````````
Racing as fast as he could to get his meeting with Kikyou over and done with, Inuyasha was not prepared for the sight that greeted him when he came upon the undead priestess engaged in apparent conversation with one of her soul collecting youkai servants. Where the surreal insect-like creatures had even come from was still somewhat of a mystery to him, so it shouldn’t have struck the hanyou as too odd to discover that Kikyou could apparently communicate with them directly on a mental level, but the sight was still mildly disturbing, considering the shinidamachuu was perched motionless on her shoulder, their foreheads touching.
After a moment, the soul collector backed away, rejoining its comrades as they floated eerily among the trees, never venturing too far from their mistress. Another lone youkai emerged from the far corner of the woods in that moment, carrying an orb, which it delivered to Kikyou before joining the others as well.
“Inuyasha…” Kikyou spoke up quietly then, her eyes holding a softness he hadn’t seen in them since her resurrection. “I am told my reincarnation has made a rather bold declaration.”
Oh boy…
“Uh…well you see, Kikyou-”
“Yet you do not seem surprised by her confession.” the undead miko added, cutting him off, which was fine with him since he had no idea what to say in the first place.
Maybe if he avoided the subject directly?
“Well…an old priest two villages over gave Kagome some kind of truth-tea because he thought we were a bunch of bandits, and the stupid runt took advantage of the situation when I got your summons, asking Kagome questions she couldn’t help but answer. It ain’t her fault, really.” he supplied, knowing how jealous of Kagome Kikyou could get, and wanting to assure his first love that her reincarnation hadn’t deliberately been trying to come between them.
“That merely excuses why her words were not left unspoken, yet also reinforces the sincerity behind them. It also does not explain your lack of surprise, unless one were to assume you had already known of her feelings for you.”
“Kikyou…” he sighed, truly at a loss for what to say.
“Yet, she remains unaware of your feelings for her.”
For the second time that night, Inuyasha felt like he had been slapped, his eyes frantically searching Kikyou’s for precisely where she was going with this.
“Kikyou, don’t be like this…” he beseeched quietly, not unaware of how he had spoken those same words to Kagome not long ago.
“You never did answer me,” she pointed out nostalgically, as if he had said nothing at all. “When I had asked you if that girl was more important to you than myself.”
“Kikyou…my life is yours.”
“But not your love.” she stated solemnly, and his ears lowered to his head, unable to think of anything to say in denial of her claim.
“That woman-child, that girl who is supposed to be my replacement, she holds your heart, even if she doesn’t know it.”
“Kikyou…” he answered finally, “I do still love you.” he confessed, and his words were truthful. There were many different types of love, after all.
“My feelings for Kagome…” he added after a moment, “They don’t matter. They can’t matter. I am bound to you.”
For a moment, Kikyou smiled, and Inuyasha wasn’t sure how he felt about the expression. It was a twisted combination of the sweet smiles that used to grace her living visage, and a sinister smirk more befitting of one of their enemies.
“Yes…your life does belong to me. In that regard, you are correct.”
Lowering his eyes at her words, Inuyasha was unaware of his pained expression as he silently examined his toes. It seemed like everyone he knew wanted his life for their own; they all wanted to be the one to kill him. Kikyou, Naraku, even his own brother…half-brother…whatever. Kagome was the only one who wanted him to live…even if it wasn’t with her. Though she would gladly welcome him into her life, if he were able. If only it was that simple…
He truly does love that girl… Kikyou thought, all traces of hatred momentarily leaving her as she fully absorbed her latest soul, that of a young maiden who had died peacefully, and in love.
Ah yes, to be young and in love…
It was rather disconcerting, existing off the life-force of others, feeling their emotions, hearing their thoughts, but it was a burden that was hers alone to bear. Most times, the souls she was given were as tormented as her own, and she relished in that hatred, savoring it, saving it, using it to fuel her own, using it in her quest against Naraku. But when she acquired a peaceful soul, like she had just done in that moment, it reminded her of happier times, of what it was like to be free, to be loved. That soul, like a few of her others, would never become tainted by the hatred that fueled her. It was too innocent, too pure…just like Kagome.
Is it so wrong that he should love Kagome as he does? Kikyou sincerely wondered in that moment. After all, she is me, and I am her, no matter how long we both deny it.
The bigger question was, was it truly fair to ask Inuyasha to go to Hell with her, knowing full well that it would not be an eternity shared together, as he believed? How could they share eternity together in Hell, when she would be reincarnated in five centuries, destined to start the cycle all over again? It was clear Inuyasha had never considered that detail, and while Kagome most likely had, she had merely kept it to herself, as she had been doing with all things until suddenly being forced to tell the truth of her feelings against her will. Perhaps another form of destiny at work…
“Inuyasha…” Kikyou spoke softly in that moment, drawing his attention as he hesitantly raised his eyes to meet her own. “You do not wish to remain bound to me in such a manner, do you?” she asked him kindly, smirking to herself as his eyes widened in panic.
“It is my place.” he answered quickly. Too quickly.
“Yes, I did desire your death, once…” Kikyou confessed, regarding him with a curious eye as he slowly processed her words. “But while I am still fueled by my feelings of hatred for you, feelings I died with, I do understand that you had not truly betrayed me.”
Gaping like a fish, Inuyasha was unable to form words as Kikyou continued. “It is only with revenge that my soul may find rest, only with the death of he who killed me. At the time I had demanded such a fate of you, I had still believed it to be your claws that had ended my life. Tell me,” she asked, grinning openly at his astounded expression, “Why do you agree to a fate that all others, including my sister, claim you do not deserve?”
Swallowing the Shikon-sized lump in his throat, Inuyasha suddenly found it very hard to find words, as his mind frantically scrambled to determine whether or not his ‘cute’ ears were playing tricks on him. Finally, he was able to find his voice, as he answered his first love truthfully.
“Because I had failed to protect you. Because if it weren’t for me, Naraku wouldn’t have killed you.”
For once in his life, Inuyasha should not be forced to take the blame for that which was not his doing… the undead miko thought sympathetically.
“But you had been unaware of the bandit Onigumo, to whom I had been tending in secret. His desire to become Naraku was solely for the jewel. You were merely a convenient tool he made use of, a means to an end. Had you not been a part of the equation, Naraku would have simply found another way.”
“Kikyou, what are you saying?”
“My death was not your fault, Inuyasha.”
The hanyou literally took a step back in shock at her words, his mind and heart raging an internal battle, caught somewhere between joy and suspicion. Was this really Kikyou saying these things? As if reading his thoughts, the undead priestess spoke again in that moment, putting any doubt as to her identity out of his mind.
“I do not release you from your pledge, Inuyasha. Your life, such as it is, still belongs to me.”
Closing his eyes, Inuyasha had to fight back his desire to scream. Then what had been the fucking point of that whole damn conversation?!
Smirking, Kikyou let the hanyou stew for a moment longer before continuing. It was amusing, watching him so desperately try to hold in his rage around her. She knew how he and her reincarnation argued and fought on a regular basis. At first she had found it disrespectful, how crude he was to others in general. Then, Kikyou had momentarily thought that the way he treated her reincarnation merely went to prove how much more important she was to him than that woman-child from the future. However, it hadn’t taken her long to realize that their open candor could have meant something else entirely. He felt comfortable around Kagome. He could be himself around Kagome. Kikyou realized in that moment – as was plainly being demonstrated before her as Inuyasha continued to hold his tongue – that he had never truly let his walls down while in her presence. All she had ever wanted was to be the one to heal his heart, but how was she supposed to accomplish such a thing if he had felt he had to be careful with what he said or did in her presence? And now, instead of healing his heart, she was one of the ones most responsible for its continued damage. Pushing her unending feelings of hatred to the furthest corners of her mind, Kikyou clung onto the echoed memories of love she had once felt for Inuyasha. It was so difficult, being a creature born of evil, while still possessing a fundamental knowledge of right and wrong. Truly, she was the monster, not the hanyou before her. Even if it truly no longer bothered her to know that he was suffering, even if she truly couldn’t care less if he were to be miserable for the rest of his days, she would do the right thing, for the sake of her soul, for the sake of Kagome.
After all, she is me…
So long as she looked at it that way, then she was still doing it for herself. Something to look forward to, in her next life.
“As the owner of your life, you will do as I demand of you. You shall continue in your quest to defeat Naraku. You shall be the vessel of my revenge against he who killed me.”
Inuyasha blinked slowly, searching for the trick in her words. He was already going to kill that bastard Naraku for what he did to her! So what made things different, now? Hesitantly, he raised his eyes to meet her own once more, a quietly uttered “Kikyou…?” leaving his lips on a whisper. Just what was she saying?
“Fail in this task, Inuyasha, and I shall seek my vengeance wherever I can. My soul cannot wander this limbo forever. Should you die by Naraku’s hand, I shall take your soul into Hell, as you have already promised me. However, I give you this opportunity to live, while you are alive. I shall not be the one to end your life, and I shall not dictate what you do with your flesh, or whom you share it with.”
His eyes grew wide at those words, a horrible crimson staining his cheeks, though Kikyou continued in her speech unfazed.
“Give me my revenge, avenge my death as he who would have been mine in life, and at the moment this task is completed, your life, and your soul, shall be yours entirely.”
“So…what you’re saying is…” he wished to be sure, “I can be with Kagome, but my soul is still yours until I defeat Naraku. But that after I kill that bastard and avenge your death, then I’m free?”
For an unresting spirit to be willing to make such a compromise, Inuyasha knew he couldn’t take her generosity for granted. Kikyou was, in a sense, a poltergeist that had been given physical form; a spirit in limbo, trapped by the painful memories surrounding its death. She was essentially saying that it was truly Naraku’s death that she required to find peace, and that if he failed to give her that, then he would be tormented with her in the afterlife, as penance for failing to avenge her. He deserved nothing less. However, Inuyasha held no fear that he might fall by Naraku’s hand. He would kill that bastard. He would rip him apart with his own claws if he had to. And when he did, then Kikyou would be avenged, and his life would be his own again. Of course, there was no way that Inuyasha could overlook what Kikyou had not-so-subtly hinted at with regard to his physical life, even before slaying Naraku. His life in his body was his to do with as he pleased even now…it was only his life-force, his soul, that she still held claim to until after he fulfilled his final obligation.
Kikyou did not answer his clarifying question out loud, but the look in her eyes assured him that he understood her perfectly.
“I agree to this.” he stated then, secretly overjoyed. It truly was as he had originally promised her, that he would join her in Hell ‘if that was their fate’. Such a fate would now only be determined based on whether or not he successfully lived passed the fall of Naraku. He no longer had to worry about Kikyou personally being the one to drag is living body into the afterlife, as she had once attempted to do. His life was his until the day he died, and then what became of him would be determined based on whether or not he had successfully avenged her. He could live with that. He would live with that. He would live, and that was the most important detail of all.
I have to tell Kagome…
“Kikyou, you…you don’t know what this means to me.”
“Yes,” she answered him, one last smile ghosting across her lips before her stoic mask was once again firmly in place. “I do.”
I feel no joy for him, but still, I know that I have done the right thing.
It was so difficult, being a creature born of evil, while still possessing a fundamental knowledge of right and wrong.
Watching Inuyasha go, as he raced through the trees back to his friends, Kikyou felt the soul of the maiden within her thank her for her sacrifice. Mentally, the miko snorted. What sacrifice? Truly, it was not as if she had given Inuyasha up forever. She would get him back, in five hundred years.
``````````````````
Inuyasha was so ecstatic to tell Kagome the good news that he didn’t even care about their friends overhearing, as he burst into the clearing shouting happily, “Kagome! You’re not going to believe…”
His words trailed off as it quickly became apparent that the miko in question was absent, as was the slayer’s nekomata companion.
“She went home, didn’t she?” he addressed the slayer knowingly, his good mood only mildly dampened.
Under normal circumstances, Sango would be giving Inuyasha the cold shoulder. He had gone off to see Kikyou again, even knowing how upset it always made Kagome, and she had gone home as a result of her upset. But circumstances were far from normal. He and Kagome hadn’t truly fought, and the slayer suspected it was mostly due to her own embarrassment, and dread over whatever it was Inuyasha had originally wanted to discuss with her upon his return, that had fueled Kagome’s desire to flee through the well this time around. Couple that with how happy he had appeared a few moments prior, before his discovery of Kagome’s absence, and the taijiya knew that whatever he had previously wanted to discuss with Kagome, something had definitely changed since then…and for the better.
“Yes…” Sango decided to answer honestly then. “I think she’s had her fill of being forced to speak her mind, for one day. Perhaps it would be best if you waited until morning before following after her?” she suggested placatingly.
“Nah, fuck that.” Inuyasha answered, though not in a truly hostile manner. “This is the perfect chance for us to talk, when I know she can’t lie to me, or choose not to answer.”
“And just what, pray tell, is it that you wish to discuss with her?” Miroku asked in that moment, his amusement clear.
“Uh…well..i-it ain’t none of your business!” Inuyasha shouted, thoroughly embarrassed as he finally realized how openly giddy he had been acting in front of his friends.
“Has Kikyou released you from your vow?” Sango asked then, eyes wide.
Damn, the slayer always had been too smart for her own good.
“Keh…” Inuyasha muttered, hating the warmth he could feel spreading through his cheeks, as he answered simply, “I just gotta avenge her death against Naraku, and not get myself killed doin’ it. All she wants is Naraku’s death, and then she’ll release her claim on my soul.”
“So your soul is still pledged to Kikyou-sama until she gets her revenge.” Miroku stated. It wasn’t phrased like a question.
“I think that’s fair!” Inuyasha defended quickly. “I don’t care what anybody says. Had I been payin’ closer attention, I woulda known somethin’ was up, and I woulda sensed Naraku being born. If I hadn’t left Kikyou alone, if I’d stayed in the area, then I woulda sensed danger comin’ and I could’ve saved her! It is my place to avenge her death, and she deserves her justice if I fail.”
“And what of Kagome-sama, in the mean time?” Miroku asked then, partially just curious over what Inuyasha really had planned, and partially protective over the girl he had come to think of as a precious little sister of sorts.
“Kikyou only holds claim on my soul, and only if I die before killing Naraku. While I’m alive, she won’t interfere, and I’m free to live my life how I want.”
“And how is that?” spoke a fourth voice not previously part of the conversation. All eyes turned to Shippou in that moment, the boy left forgotten and presumably asleep in Kagome’s sleeping bag.
“Butt out, runt.” Inuyasha stated with a glare, but the two humans at camp were quick to agree with the kitsune.
“Shippou’s right…” Miroku stated in that moment. “I trust your intentions towards Kagome are honorable?”
“K-keh!” he spluttered. “Who d’you think I am, you?” Inuyasha defended. “Of course my ‘intentions’ are ‘honorable’. Feh.”
Giggling quietly at Miroku’s scandaled expression, Sango added, “Just be honest with Kagome-chan, especially since she currently has no choice but to be honest with you. Sometimes, you say things we all know you don’t mean, but they are still hurtful to hear.”
“I…” Inuyasha began, before closing his mouth. Sango was right. Sometimes he did say things he didn’t mean, things that were hurtful…but he wouldn’t do that this time! Would he? Was it possible that something would end up embarrassing him enough that he’d put his foot in his mouth during the most important conversation of his life? The more he thought about it, the stronger the butterflies in his stomach became, with regard to just what, exactly, he planned on saying to Kagome once he saw her. And what if she started crying? He knew he was never any good around tears.
“Maybe Inuyasha needs to drink the tea of truth, and then he’d have to be honest, no matter what!” Shippou piped up in that moment.
Growling under his breath in annoyance, Inuyasha was just about to bop the kid on the head when his fist froze mid-air, and he looked down at the cringing child with wonder.
Hesitantly lowering his arms from above his head, Shippou was stunned at the expression on the hanyou’s face. “Inuyasha?” he voiced quietly.
“I’ll do it.” the inu-hanyou stated in that moment, turning to Miroku. “You know how to make that stuff, right? You’d said before that you knew of the potion, when you said it would be harmless for Kagome to drink it.”
“I…” the houshi started slowly, truly stunned and trying to catch up with what had just happened, before a full-blown grin broke out over his face. “Why, yes! I do indeed know how to brew that tea, and I do believe that Kaede-sama has all of the necessary ingredients already on hand.” Turning to gaze in the kitsune’s direction, he praised, “What a wonderful idea, Shippou.”
The boy puffed his chest with pride.
“There’s just one problem,” Sango spoke up in that moment. “With Kagome-chan gone on Kirara, we don’t all have a way back to Kaede-sama’s village before daybreak.”
“That’s not true!” Shippou chimed in, transforming in a *pop* to his bird disguise. “I can carry one of you.” the kit stated, willing to do whatever it took, including exhaust himself, if it meant making Kagome happy, and Inuyasha confessing his love for her while under the influence of the truth-tea would definitely make Kagome happy.
“Then it’s settled.” Inuyasha stated with conviction, opting to carry Sango, as it would be much less awkward for him, and with the added weight of Hiraikotsu, he feared the slayer with all of her gear would be too heavy for the runt, anyway. Truth be told, he did care for the boy, even if he never showed it. Hopefully he would be able to depart for Kagome’s world immediately after drinking the tea, so that he would not end up being forced to admit to such a thing out loud, although whatever unpleasant ‘side effects’ turned up as a result of this decision, it would be worth it, for Kagome. Carrying Kagome’s backpack and sleeping bag as well, as the girl had left all of her possessions behind during her hasty departure, the hanyou took off in that moment, making sure to keep a pace the fox-turned-bird would be able to keep up with while carrying Miroku. They were still traveling about five times faster than a human could run on their own, and at their current rate, they would make it back to Kaede’s well before dawn.
``````````````````
Five hundred years in the future, the morbidly embarrassed miko was frantically trying to figure out how she could sneak up to her room without alerting any of her family. She wished she had thought of this before hand, but her suddenly showing up at around 11 o’clock at night was bound to arouse suspicion, and she was in no position to dodge any questions regarding what had happened back in the past. Maybe she should just camp out in the well-house until dawn? That thought would be mildly more appealing if she had at least remembered to bring her supplies back with her…or at the very least, her sleeping bag. Finally deciding that it was much too cold and uncomfortable in the well-house without any outdoor bedding, Kagome opened the shed door as slowly and quietly as possible. Stealthfully tiptoeing across the shrine grounds, she made her way to the main house as quiet as a cat demon.
It’s too bad Kirara can’t come through the well, ‘cause then I could just ride her up to my window.
Kagome knew where her mom kept the hide-a-key near the front door, so hopefully she would be able to Ninja her way through the house and up to her room without waking anyone. It was the prospect of somebody already being awake that worried her more than anything else. It was late, but it wasn’t that late. What would she say if somebody caught her?
The truth… she realized begrudgingly.
She couldn’t let herself get caught.
Carefully opening and closing the front door, the miko slipped off her shoes in the genkan, before tiptoeing with sock-clad feet into the rest of the house. So far, so good, it looked like everyone had retired to bed, with not a single light left on in the entire house. Having grown more accustomed to seeing in the dark over the last few months, thanks to night after night of nothing but firelight back in the Sengoku jidai, the fifteen-year-old easily maneuvered around the shadowed forms of her family’s furnishings, until she made her way to the stairs. The stairs…
Oh boy…forgot about this part.
Gulping quietly, she lifted up one foot and very slowly began shifting her weight, cringing at the distinguishable creek of wood that gave way at the change in pressure. Nearly all of the stairs squeaked with age. There was no way she could make it up them silently. Giving up, at least for the time being, Kagome grimaced as the wood beneath her foot protested the removable of her weight as well, before she quickly backpedaled and made her way into the kitchen before somebody peaked downstairs to see whether or not it was just the cat. Where was Buyo when she needed him, anyway? A few well-timed meows would probably enable her to scale the staircase unnoticed. Maybe she should just stay in the kitchen? Maybe, in the morning, she would be able to pretend that she had only just then returned. How long would it take for the tea take to wear off, exactly? Sometimes her grandfather woke up pretty early…
Contemplating whether or not she could pull a chair back to have a seat at the kitchen table without making any noise, so she could at least rest her head on her arms for a little while, it was in that moment that the future-born-miko noticed an out of place piece of paper sitting on the table. That was odd. Her mother always made sure the wooden table was completely spotless before going to bed. Cracking open the fridge door to let in enough light for her to see without alerting her family upstairs to her presence, Kagome glanced down at the piece of paper only to realize in surprise that it was a letter…to her.
Dear Kagome,
I don’t know why, but my Mother’s intuition
is telling me that you will be coming home early,
so I wanted to leave you this note so that you
don’t worry when you come home to find the
house completely empty. You know how your
Jii-chan has been wanting to visit the Sunrise
Shrine on the east coast, so I finally agreed
to take him. Because we will be gone for three
days, Souta is staying at a friend’s house, and
he’s taken Buyo with him for convenience.
There is plenty of food in the fridge, and I’ve
left money in your room for whatever other
supplies you might need. I hope all is well
with your friends in the past, and I hope
your early return wasn’t the result of a
fight. If it was, then know that your family
loves you, honey, and that I have faith
that in the end, everything will work out
as it was meant to. The kami work in
mysterious ways.
~ Love Mama
“Oh…Mama…” Kagome murmured softly upon finishing her mother’s letter. It was dated that morning.
Every once in a while, her mother had always displayed, as far back as she could remember, some amount of borderline sixth sense. The woman had been absolutely frantic the last day her husband had left for work, never to return again. Kagome remembered it well…
But this was hardly the time or place to be dredging up such random, sad memories. Her mother had sensed her early return home, and had left her a letter as a result; a letter that explained how she hadn’t needed to act like a burglar, as she had previously been doing. Rolling her eyes at herself, Kagome closed the fridge door before grabbing her mother’s note and heading back through the house and up to her room, unconcerned about how much noise she made on the stairs. A quick glance in the other bedrooms confirmed the authenticity of her mom’s letter; the house was empty.
The kami work in mysterious ways, indeed… the miko thought as she peeled out of her dusty school uniform and into some clean and fresh smelling pajamas. At least the kami had spared her the embarrassment of having to face her mother’s questions while still under the effects of the tea. What timing. Her grandfather had been wanting to visit that coastal shrine for the last few years. Maybe her mother’s ‘intuition’ went beyond merely writing her a letter.
“Thanks, Mom…” the miko whispered aloud in her quiet room, looking forward to the idea of spending the next two days alone.
Converting /tmp/phpiXZSnj to /dev/stdout
Inuyasha, and the characters therein, are the property of Rumiko Takahashi. I am in no way affiliated with Takahashi, or VIZ Productions.
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Nominated for Best Lemon, IYFG, 1st Quarter 2010
Winner!!! 3rd Place for Best Inu/Kag Romance, Feudal Association, 1st Quarter 2011
A/N:
This story takes place earlier in the timeline during what I used to call the ‘randomly generated anime episode’ time period, though I guess I will have to come up with a new name since they have since completed the rest of the story in anime format, but that’s neither here nor there. Just for a basic point of reference, for the purposes of this story, they are currently still searching for jewel shards as well as hunting Naraku, which means that Kikyou is of course still alive, and that Kouga is still showing up at random to proclaim his love for Kagome. Please suspend disbelief with regard to the off-canon nature of this supposedly canon story, and enjoy!
Chapter 1 – ...The Whole Truth…
“I see…so you, the hanyou, the houshi, the taijiya and the kitsune are all working together to hunt down Naraku and complete the Shikon no Tama.” the village priest repeated, nodding his head sagely as he recalled hearing many tales in recent months of a strange group of travelers that were seeking the scattered shards of the sacred jewel.
Descriptions of precisely who made up that group of individuals seemed to vary depending on whom you asked, so he hadn’t immediately recognized Kagome’s group for who they were when they had first entered his village earlier that morning.
“Yes, exactly.” the future-born miko replied, at first having felt terrified to feel the effects of his ‘truth tea’, but since feeling more relaxed as she realized this man was fighting on the side of good, and that he truly meant no harm to either her or her friends.
Unfortunately, there had been recent rumors of a group of bandits that roughly matched their description, the group consisting of both men and women with at least one youkai. What were the odds? But Kagome couldn’t rightfully blame the man for wanting to protect his village. When they had first attempted to reason with the village headman regarding their true intentions, the priest had stepped forward and asked boldly if any of them would willingly submit to drinking his tea of truth, calling upon Kagome to be the one before any of them had even had a chance to respond. Thinking back on it, she could still hear Inuyasha cursing in her head even now, when he had basically ordered her to not drink anything the priest gave to her. But they would’ve been found guilty otherwise! She hadn’t had a choice! Miroku had uttered quietly that he was familiar with the potion the village priest spoke of, assuring her that it was both legitimate and harmless, and so to save everyone, including herself, the future-born-miko had conceded to taking the Feudal era’s equivalent of a lie detector test.
Having feared that the monk and slayer robes of Miroku and Sango were meant as a deception, and finding Kagome’s own outfit completely bizarre and more than a little inappropriate, the village priest had been downright convinced that these people were indeed the traveling bandits, until Kagome’s story had proven otherwise. While under the influence of his potion, the girl was not only incapable of lying, but she was actually urged to answer any and all questions asked upon her, so simply remaining silent wasn’t an option, either, as fully honest answers were given to every one of his questions.
Realizing in that moment that she was the reincarnation of the guardian of the Shikon no Tama, and that she was on a holy mission blessed by the kami – how else could you really explain the magic of the Bone Eater’s Well? – the priest immediately sent Kagome and her friends on their way with humble apologies for the mistake, as well as his vow to never tell a soul of the important secrets he had learned.
“Feh…unless someone makes you drink that fucking tea…” Inuyasha muttered under his breath, while Miroku spoke with the village headman about rumors of a youkai disturbance in a neighboring village that might involve a Shikon shard.
“Come on, let’s get the hell out of here.” Inuyasha spoke up after Miroku told him of the possible lead.
“No complaints here.” Sango stated in compliance, the youkai exterminator not having appreciated being confused for an honorless criminal wearing a knockoff of the taijiya uniform.
“Miko-sama, one word of caution.” the priest spoke up as they were moving to depart. “Speak cautiously. The tea’s effects shall last until morning.”
Just fucking great… Inuyasha thought, dreading the idea of some random youkai showing up and asking her point blank where their jewel shards were.
“Should we just stay here for the night, until the tea wears off?” Shippou asked in that moment, but the child’s logic was dismissed when Inuyasha snorted, stating despite his own concerns, “We need to get a move on. Especially if there is a youkai near the next village that might have a jewel shard.”
Smirking, Miroku turned to the miko beside him in that moment, and asked, “What do you think, Kagome-sama?”
Kagome smiled before answering the houshi truthfully. “I actually agree with Inuyasha.” she stated. “If there is a chance of getting another jewel shard, not to mention stopping a dangerous youkai before it causes any more damage, then we shouldn’t wait around just for the effects of the tea to wear off.”
Inuyasha was somewhat taken aback. Kagome actually agreed with him? It seemed like they almost always fought over that sort of thing, and he could usually tell that whenever she did agree with him, it was merely to avoid a fight, not that she actually agreed.
But she really does agree with me this time, because she has to tell the truth right now… he knew. Huh…he realized after a moment. Maybe this won’t be so bad, after all.
``````````````````
Ugh, if I had known it was going to be this bad, I would have wanted to stay in the village until tomorrow… Kagome grumbled to herself, before an idea struck her and she tried a little experiment. I absolutely love all of Inuyasha’s questions…she thought without sarcasm lacing her tone, realizing, Huh, looks like I can still lie in my thoughts, all the good that does me.
“So what do you like about my ears?” he asked her in that moment, and she rolled her eyes. Is this guy for real?
It was time to get even.
“I think they’re cute.” the miko answered matter-of-factly, snickering to herself at the light dusting of pink that instantly appeared on Inuyasha’s cheeks and nose with her latest answer.
That’s what he gets… she thought in amusement, satisfied to finally have the tables of embarrassment turned around.
It had all started out innocently enough.
In light of her agreeing with his decision to get back out on the road again, the hanyou had asked her, despite knowing of the effects of the tea, if she had really meant what she’d said. Just to make her repeat it, no doubt.
“Do you really agree with me?” had been his actual question.
Kagome hadn’t caught on, at first, and had readily answered that yes, she did indeed agree that it was best to put a stop to that attacking youkai as quickly as possible. She had actually been a little hurt, at first. Had he really thought that she would be so self-conscious that she’d rather hide out in the relative safety of the village until the effects of the tea wore off, even at the possible cost of people’s lives? The tea didn’t prevent Kagome from speaking her own mind, so long as her words were truthful, and so she’d let him have it for being surprised by her amount of consideration for other people. He should know her by now, damn it!
Having fully expected an argument, Kagome had been mildly surprised when Inuyasha had appeared to hold his tongue, a light dusting of pink gracing his cheeks before he snapped his gaze away from her as he proceeded to march down the trail to the next village. Of course, Kagome had eventually realized that what Inuyasha had actually been surprised about had been her simple admittance to having agreed with him, regardless of the subject matter, instead of arguing simply for the sake of arguing, which was apparently what he usually thought she was doing whenever she disagreed with something he said. So she had eventually apologized, confessing that she shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions so quickly, as she reiterated for the third time that yes, she did agree with him, while also issuing forth another light apology for all of the times they usually fought. She didn’t like to argue simply for the sake of arguing, but sometimes, part of her might agree with him while another part of her wouldn’t, and so she had to stick to her guns, even if part of her understood where he was coming from. In return, he had miraculously apologized to her as well, for the misunderstanding, because he hadn’t meant for her to take his question the way she had, as if she were possibly capable of being selfish enough to put herself before the welfare of others. She was too damn caring for something like that. Warmth had bubbled up in her chest at his words…
It had all gone downhill from there.
His sudden question of “What else do you actually agree with me about, at least in part?” had led to her reluctant admittance of knowing that finding the jewel shards and defeating Naraku were more important, on the grand scale of things, than her grades at school.
That confession had of course triggered a string of questions regarding why she always insisted, then, that she had to make it back home in time for her ‘stupid tests’, which had then caused Kagome to launch into a rather detailed description of the schooling system in her time, and how it was important to her and her family that she not bring them any dishonor by failing to get into high school. Yes, saving lives was more important than her own honor. Of course it was! But that didn’t mean that school wasn’t still important in its own right, and she really needed to see if she could continue juggling both. If it ever came down to actually being forced to choose, of course she would aid in a battle against Naraku before abandoning her friends to go take a test at school, but so far, her returning home for her schoolwork had never been a life or death decision.
Inuyasha’s eyes had actually softened a little after that conversation had ended, Kagome’s schooling having finally been put into perspective in a way that he could understand. While he still didn’t really understand, he could at least accept that it was a matter of honor, and to know that her responsibilities in his time with the jewel and Naraku were putting her and her family’s honor at stake back in her own world had caused the hanyou to feel a bit of sympathy for the girl. His questioning had stopped…for a little while.
Then it had been time to eat lunch.
Halfway through slurping his noodles Inuyasha had paused, remembering something that Kagome usually complained about. Noting how surprisingly quiet she was being in that moment had only made him more suspicious.
His sudden question of “Do you really think I eat like a pig?” had immediately led to her clipped answer of, “Yes, I do.”
Kagome had been bound and determined to keep her answers as short as possible, especially if another round of twenty-questions was about to get underway.
“Does it bother you that I eat like a pig?”
“Not really.”
“Why?”
“It’s understandable.”
“Why is it understandable?”
“Considering the life you’ve had to live, I can’t blame you for instinctively eating your food as quickly as possible.”
At least she had managed to answer that question without mentioning anything about canine instincts. He never appreciated being compared to a dog.
Intrigued by her answer, especially considering that no one had ever shown him any sort of sympathy or understanding before, Inuyasha had then asked the miko, “What else is understandable, considering the life I’ve had to live?”
At that point, Miroku and Sango had started exchanging silent glances back and forth between the hanyou and miko, like watching a tennis match. They both wondered how far Inuyasha planned on taking his dangerous game, and how long Kagome would play along before she realized that the tea did not hinder her ability to osuwari him.
At his latest question, the miko had confessed that she couldn’t really blame him for his untrusting nature, or his harsh, somewhat crude behavior when it came to interacting with other people. His chest had almost seemed to puff with pride at her words, as if her excusing his behavior as understandable had actually been a complement of some sort. Of course, it hadn’t taken long to dawn on the taijiya and houshi that Kagome’s words probably had been taken as a compliment from Inuyasha’s point of view. Not that he necessarily felt vindicated for behaving the way he did, but more simply, that she had not accused his crass nature on his hanyou status. It was because he was a jaded outcast that he acted the way he did, not because he was a vile monster incapable of higher intelligence.
“Keh.”
Kagome had breathed a sigh of relief, believing his current line of questioning to be over, but her reprieve was proven short-lived when he suddenly asked her, “So what do you like about me?”
Sango had groaned, while Miroku did his best not to snicker out loud. Shippou had shared a glance with Kirara before getting back to his own lunch, the kitsune child having decided that he was no longer interested in their conversation if it was just going to be about Inuyasha from that point onward.
With a nice rosy hue of pink staining her cheeks, Kagome had begun listing off Inuyasha’s various strong points, in that he was physically strong, determined, brave…well you get the idea.
Inuyasha 1, Kagome 0
It had dawned on Kagome during all of this, however, that so long as the question was vague enough, she still had some measure of control over how she answered, so long as she was truthful and also not deliberately attempting to omit something important she had thought of in the forefront of her mind. She had already experimented earlier in the day with trying to tell a lie, and the act was like pushing against an invisible force field. She would pause in her speech, temporarily unable to say anything at all as the words she had attempted to speak were plucked from her throat. But remaining silent entirely wasn’t an option, either, she knew, as the longer she attempted to hold her mouth closed, the more holding her words in began to feel like holding her breath. The moment would inevitably come when she simply had to say something. However, knowing that when she didn’t resist answering the questions asked upon her, she was then given a marginal amount of control with regard to her answers, depending on the nature of the question, it was in that moment that Kagome decided to have a little fun.
It was with that last thought in mind that Kagome had deliberately added his ears to her list of things she liked about him, figuring that the embarrassment he would feel at her mention of the appendages she knew he didn’t much care for would outrank any embarrassment she might feel herself for having said it in the first place. Sending a playful wink Sango and Miroku’s way when Inuyasha wasn’t looking had let her friends know that the final item on her list had been added on purpose, and the monk had smirked in his own amusement while the taijiya had merely continued to shake her head in disbelief over how juvenile their hanyou friend was acting, given Kagome’s present condition. Sango just hoped the miko knew what she was doing.
Inuyasha hadn’t taken the bait, at first, asking Kagome to elaborate in other aspects of his character, which she had become happier to do once it’d dawned on her that Inuyasha had actually seemed almost desperate for the reaffirmation of his self-worth. Was it really that he had honestly believed she’d thought so little of him, or more that he truly thought so little of himself? But soon enough she’d finally gotten what she’d wanted, and seeing him turn away in embarrassment in that moment as his questioning suddenly came to a halt, the miko did a little mental happy-dance while evening out the tally in her mind.
Inuyasha 1, Kagome 1
Inuyasha was, in fact, dumbstruck and honored to hear some of the things Kagome actually thought about him, her admittances filling him with a sense of pride that almost felt foreign after being told he was nothing and worthless for most of his life. When he’d first asked her what she liked about his ears, he had honestly expected her to say something in regard to how keen his sense of hearing was, figuring that despite their appearance, she appreciated them for their functionality in that regard. He had not been expecting her to call his ears cute!
F-feh! Stupid wench, she said that on purpose just to mess with me, the hanyou realized as he caught the way Kagome was winking at their snickering friends. Still…despite saying it on purpose to embarrass him, Inuyasha did remain aware of the fact that in order for her to have said it at all, it still had to be the truth. She really thinks they’re cute…?
“You are playing with fire.” Inuyasha heard Miroku whisper in an amused tone of warning to Kagome, and he scoffed at the lecher’s concerns.
It hadn’t been his goal to see how badly he could embarrass the girl, and the monk had better not start asking her anything perverted or else he wouldn’t hesitate to knock the bastard unconscious until the effects of the tea were completely clear from her system. Realizing that he had still managed to embarrass Kagome, though, Inuyasha figured that they were probably even with her little comment about his ears, and quickly decided to change the subject before he ended up saying something that would renew his acquaintanceship with the ground.
“So…wench…what all do you actually study at that ‘school’ thing of yours?”
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Entering the quiet, victimized village later that afternoon, Kagome still had a slight smile on her face, truly touched by Inuyasha’s efforts to no longer take advantage of the effects of the tea. He didn’t give a rat’s ass about her schooling and you would never be able to convince her otherwise, but asking her such a question had been his way of apologizing for his earlier behavior, and she had forgiven him, of course. As was evidenced by the way she was currently riding on his back.
While Inuyasha suspected that the miko on his back had forgiven him for earlier, he refused to ask her directly, wishing to avoid bringing up what a baka he had been. After managing to get back on her good side, Inuyasha had actually refrained from asking Kagome any additional questions at all, except for simple things like if she wanted to stop yet or if she could continue to travel further. He wanted to hear that answer. Finally, the girl wouldn’t be able to utterly exhaust herself by refusing to appear weak in his eyes.
Kagome had been unable to hide it when her feet had started bothering her, her quiet admittance resulting in finishing off the last mile of travel riding on Inuyasha’s back, and that was cause for another, somewhat larger smile to grace the miko’s lips in that moment, knowing that her hanyou companion would not see it as she was currently still riding upon his back as they entered the desolate village that had recently fallen victim to numerous youkai attacks. At least according to the previous village.
Those rumors turned out to be true when, after some mild investigating, Inuyasha revealed that he could definitely detect the stench of reptilian youkai. Placing Kagome back on her feet, Inuyasha dropped to the ground, looking for the freshest scent trail, and then he was off. Her feet having been given a chance to rest, Kagome could easily keep up as everyone followed after Inuyasha in that moment, the inu-hanyou following his nose to an ugly beast that was presently lurking just outside the village’s borders.
As soon as the strangers were gone, frightened villagers began peaking their heads out of what few buildings remained standing, hoping that the conversation they had overheard was legitimate, and that the strangers were in fact there to help them by slaying the youkai.
Coming face to face with the beast in question not five minutes later, the inu-tachi sized the creature up before unanimously deciding that the low-level youkai was truly no threat to hunters of their skill-level, the jewel shard currently resting in its belly being the only thing that gave the weakling any strength at all. One thing was quickly proven to be a threat to them, however.
“Yoooouuuuu havvvvve jeeeeewwwllll ssssssssshhhhardsssszzzzz” the beast hissed, surprising Inuyasha, who honestly hadn’t been expecting the overgrown gecko to be able to talk.
Eyeing Kagome directly, the lizard-youkai garbled out, “Whhhheeerrrrrrrrreee arrrrree thhhheeeyyyy?”
Unable to avoid answering the question, Kagome closed her eyes and tried her hardest to fight the spell, but eventually rasped out, “In…a…bot…tle a…round my…neck.”
“Damn it all!” Inuyasha bellowed immediately.
“I’m sorry!” Kagome cried, her hands rushing to the bottle as if in an extra attempt to protect it from imminent attack.
Shit…Sango mentally cursed, aiming her giant boomerang in the hope of decapitating the rapidly approaching youkai in one solid swing. Why couldn’t it have just demanded we hand the shards over? That’s not a question… the slayer grumbled to herself as she released her weapon with a fearsome cry of “Hiraikotsu!”
The tokage was surprisingly quick on its feet, however, as it easily dodged Sango’s weapon, proving itself to be somewhat of a greater threat than they had originally believed. It didn’t take long for the reptile to close the remaining distance between itself and the temporarily distracted miko.
“Oh no you don’t!” Inuyasha hollered in that moment, coming down in front of Kagome with the transformed Tetsusaiga descending on a powerful swing.
Jumping back to avoid decapitation a second time, the lizard-youkai rose up onto its hind legs before rapidly swinging its body around, hoping to hit Inuyasha with its giant tail. Fortunately, the hanyou realized what the gecko was doing, and quickly grabbed Kagome before leaping out of the way.
“It’s fast, but its youki is weak.” Inuyasha whispered into the girl’s ear, not knowing the lizard’s strength of hearing but not willing to take any chances. “I’ll distract it. Ready an arrow.”
Nodding her understanding while trying to get her shaky breathing back under control, Kagome did as Inuyasha asked while he rushed off to get the youkai’s attention away from her.
“Hey, ugly!” he bellowed, holding up a closed fist. “I’ve got the jewel shards, now. What’re ya gonna do about it?”
His words made the miko raise an uncertain hand to her chest, only to discover that her bottle of shards was still hanging in place around her neck; Inuyasha was lying.
What a wonderful ability to possess.
Shaking such negative thoughts free from her mind, the miko knew she needed to redeem herself by not missing this shot. The lizard youkai was weak enough that it would take it a moment to sense that the shards were still with her, so in that single moment, as it stood trying to determine whether or not the hanyou really had the shards now, Kagome took her chance.
Hit the mark! she shouted in her mind, holding her breath.
The tokage sensed her approaching arrow too late, turning its head just in time for its eyes to widen in surprise before her arrow pierced its throat, the gecko-youkai disappearing into sparkly dust as a purified jewel shard dropped to the ground.
“She did it!” Shippou cried happily, the boy’s words mirroring the rest of the inu-gang’s thoughts.
Walking forward to collect their latest jewel shard, Kagome offered Inuyasha a brief, apologetic look for her earlier tea-induced slipup, before turning to address everyone as she stated, “Well, I suppose the villagers should be told that the youkai has been taken care of.”
“Yes,” Miroku agreed in that moment, adding, “It would be irresponsible of us to allow them to continue needlessly living in fear.”
“You guys better go on without me, though.” Kagome said then, passing a quick glance in Inuyasha’s direction before shifting her gaze to focus on Sango and Miroku. She knew there was no way the hanyou would ever leave her in the woods by herself, so her words were basically directed towards the houshi and taijiya as she added, “Wouldn’t want to risk somebody asking me something I shouldn’t answer.”
“Oh, Kagome-chan…” Sango said softly in understanding.
She wanted to argue against the miko’s worries, but truly, the youkai exterminator knew that her friend was right. Even a seemingly innocent question like asking her where she had come across such a bizarre kimono would likely trigger an answer involving secrets that really shouldn’t be told.
“We’ll be quick.” Miroku spoke up after a moment, a silent glance passed between himself and the slayer confirming that both he and Sango had similar thoughts.
Watching them walk away through the trees, Kagome stared after them for a moment before shifting her gaze to glance in Inuyasha’s direction, only to note how he was staring off in another direction entirely. What Kagome had missed seeing was the way he had been staring directly at her, only to quickly look away when she’d started to turn her head in his direction.
Sensing the awkwardness developing between the miko and hanyou, Shippou spoke up in that moment with, “Don’t worry, Kagome. We all know you couldn’t help saying what you did, and the tea will wear off really soon!”
Smiling a somewhat forlorn, yet appreciative smile, Kagome nodded her thanks to the young boy. “That’s right. It will, won’t it?” she agreed in a soft tone, chancing another glance in Inuyasha’s direction only to see him continuing to ignore her.
Tomorrow morning can’t get here fast enough… she thought dejectedly.
The rest of the afternoon and evening passed by without much incident, the inu-tachi having decided to head north after the rescued village had no information to offer as far as any potential new leads. After politely declining the villagers’ offer for free room and board as payment for slaying the gecko-youkai, Miroku had managed to sweet talk their way into payment in the form of food, so dinner would be taken care of that night without the need to worry over hunting or fishing.
Setting up camp for the night was fairly routine, with Sango working to build up their campfire while Miroku gathered additional firewood to last them throughout the night. Inuyasha and Kirara both broke off to scout around the immediate area checking for threats, of which they thankfully found none. Kagome figured she might as well try to get a few minutes of studying in, like she usually did, although the miko didn’t feel opposed to the idea of engaging the others in conversation. Truth be told, and there was no way around that for the moment, Kagome appreciated her friends’ consideration, but found it unnecessary. She would admit that she had been a little nervous back in the beginning, mainly worried that Miroku might’ve started asking her inappropriate questions, but she was pretty sure that a glare from either Sango or Inuyasha, or both, had stilled the houshi’s tongue in that regard. Aside from that single concern, there was really no reason to fear chatting with her friends. She had always been a fairly honest person, after all, so how much difference could the truth tea really make?
She had her answer when the companionable silence after dinner was suddenly broken by Shippou’s young voice commenting “Look!”
There, towards the east, shimmering in between the dark trees of the forest was the unmistakable glow of several shinidamachuu. Miroku and Sango both stiffened at the sight, and the steady silence around camp went from comfortable to awkward in an instant. Casting a quick glance in Kagome’s direction, the hanyou’s ‘cute’ ears lowered regretfully against his head, as Inuyasha silently stood up, his eyes reflecting his apologies as he prepared to respond to his former love’s summons.
This wasn’t right. Something had to be done. This was the perfect opportunity, and if nobody else was going to take advantage of it, then he would.
“Kagome! Why don’t you say something!?” Shippou bellowed, Inuyasha freezing in his tracks as a collective gasp could be heard among the other members of camp.
“It isn’t my place to say anything, Shippou-chan.” Kagome answered quietly, refusing to meet anyone’s eyes as she stared at her own feet.
Part of Inuyasha wanted to make a run for it before things got any worse. Another part of him desperately wanted to close the gap between himself and the future-born-miko, doing whatever was in his power to make the sadness in her scent go away. He knew she hated it whenever he left to see Kikyou, but…
“But why?” the kitsune whined in that moment.
“Shippou…leave it alone.” Miroku stated with no small measure of authority, but the fox-child refused to be swayed.
“Because Inuyasha and Kikyou have a history together that can never be changed, and he has every right to visit with her whenever he wishes.” Kagome answered the kit, raising her head to narrow her eyes at the boy when it became apparent to her what Shippou was really up to. If he managed to ask her the right question…
“So you really don’t mind?!” the boy asked incredulously, revealing he was far more observant when it came to adult matters than any of them had ever given him credit for. He knew quite well of her feelings for the hanyou.
“Shippou!” Sango scolded, but it was already too late.
Please don’t make me say it… Kagome begged both of Shippou as well as her own traitorous tongue.
“Of course I mind.” she answered, her words more bitter than she had intended.
Inuyasha felt like he had been slapped. Never before had he heard Kagome use such a tone of voice, at least not in regard to himself in any way. Yes, he had already known that it bothered her whenever he left to see Kikyou, but like she had just admitted, herself, it wasn’t really her place to say anything on the matter. Still, the hanyou couldn’t help but to feel guilty for the pain he was obviously causing her, so against his better judgment, he spoke up himself in that moment.
“Kagome…don’t be like this.” he murmured softly, pleading with his eyes for her to understand.
Her eyes narrowed further.
“Be like what? Honest? Can’t help it right now, in case you haven’t noticed.” she snapped, before her own eyes softened in apology at the hurt look that splashed across his face.
“I’m sorry…” she apologized with honest regret for not holding her tongue, unable to tell him that she hadn’t mean what she’d said, because she had, and he knew it. “Just…go. Kikyou is waiting for you.”
“And you hate it.” the hanyou supplied.
It wasn’t stated in question form, but Kagome still answered nonetheless, lowering her gaze before whispering so quietly that only demonic ears could hear her, “Yes…”
Inuyasha wanted to ask her why, but thought better of it, pretty sure he knew the answer, and very sure that Kagome wouldn’t appreciate him forcing her to admit it aloud. Unfortunately, they had both temporarily forgotten about the not-so-innocent kitsune.
“Then why do you always do this to yourself, Kagome?” Shippou asked softly, all the while wondering if it would really do any good. If that baka was too insensitive to already know how it hurt Kagome whenever he ditched her to go see that walking corpse, then hearing her say it now probably wouldn’t change a damn thing.
On the other side of the campfire, Miroku, Sango, and even Kirara were holding their breaths for what was about to happen.
Mind scrambling, Kagome realized with a growing sense of panic that there was simply nothing else she could say that would be any more honest than the one, true answer.
“Because I love him.” she stated matter-of-factly, quickly deciding in that moment that if she was going to go down, then she might as well do it with whatever little pride she had left, as she lifted her head to meet Inuyasha’s gaze head-on. “And he loves Kikyou.” she added solemnly, before immediately turning to fix her gaze on the kitsune.
“Now,” she stated with slow, deadly precision, “If you are quite done meddling in adult matters that do not concern you, go to bed. Perhaps two weeks without any candy will do you some good.”
Shippou wanted to whine like the little boy he was at the prospect of having his pockey and lollypops taken away for two whole weeks, but quickly thought better of it, casting a sidelong glance in Inuyasha’s direction. Shippou caught what Kagome had failed to notice, as she’d immediately turned her gaze away from the hanyou upon her statement about his feelings for Kikyou. The look in Inuyasha’s eyes could only be described as surprise mixed with confusion, and it was clear he wanted to say something further, but was arguing with himself over whether or not he should.
“Okay, Kagome…” Shippou mumbled in that moment, complying with her command as he crawled into bed without saying anything further.
Inuyasha was surprised, and he was confused.
While it had turned out that he had been correct in his assumption regarding why it really bothered Kagome whenever he left to see Kikyou, hearing the second half of her reasoning for why she’d never before said anything on the subject had promptly thrown him for a loop. Sure, Inuyasha knew that Kagome had feelings for him. It was kind of obvious, wasn’t it? But he had thought she’d known that he felt the same way! It was his obligation to Kikyou that prevented anything from developing between himself and the future-born-miko, because he owed her his life for what had happened to her, not because he still had feelings for her. Well…in a way, of course he still had some feelings for Kikyou. You never stoped loving your first love, not entirely. But if it weren’t for his vow to join her in Hell, if that was their fate, then he would’ve openly proclaimed his feelings for Kagome a long time ago. He was simply bound to Kikyou by honor, and unless the undead miko released him from his vow of dying with her, there was really nothing he could do about it. He knew Kagome knew of his vow to die with Kikyou, and he knew that it bothered her because of her desire for the two of them to be together, knowing it could never be…but was it really possible that she also thought the only reason he’d made such a vow in the first place was because of some continued unending love for Kikyou? Was it really possible that Kagome thought that she herself meant nothing to him?
Inuyasha was just getting ready to open his mouth to speak when a shinidamachuu chose that exact moment to slither into camp, circling itself around his torso before floating off the way it’d come. Somebody was getting impatient.
“You better not keep Kikyou waiting.” Kagome said in that moment, though her tone of voice was falsely cheery rather than snide.
Clearly wanting to argue, Inuyasha’s body twitched forward in Kagome’s direction before he stopped himself, his ears having sprung up merely to lower once more.
“We need to talk about this.” he stated quietly, but loud enough to ensure she heard him, before he quickly turned and bound off through the trees in the direction of the soul collectors.
I have no desire to hear you lecture me about how I’m just a foolish girl and I need to get over you… Kagome thought bitterly, before turning smiling eyes towards Sango.
“Well, I think it would probably be best if I go home, at least until the tea wears off, ne?” she asked with a forced chuckle.
The slayer immediately picked up on the obvious hint, and with a quietly ordered “Kirara…” the fire-cat was roaring into full-size, ready to take the fifteen-year-old to the Bone Eater’s Well.
Miroku, having also noticed something in Inuyasha’s expression while Kagome had refused to make eye contact with the hanyou, spoke up in that moment with, “Have faith. All may not be as dire as it appears.”
“Thanks…” Kagome answered disbelievingly, before Kirara took to the skies.
``````````````````
Racing as fast as he could to get his meeting with Kikyou over and done with, Inuyasha was not prepared for the sight that greeted him when he came upon the undead priestess engaged in apparent conversation with one of her soul collecting youkai servants. Where the surreal insect-like creatures had even come from was still somewhat of a mystery to him, so it shouldn’t have struck the hanyou as too odd to discover that Kikyou could apparently communicate with them directly on a mental level, but the sight was still mildly disturbing, considering the shinidamachuu was perched motionless on her shoulder, their foreheads touching.
After a moment, the soul collector backed away, rejoining its comrades as they floated eerily among the trees, never venturing too far from their mistress. Another lone youkai emerged from the far corner of the woods in that moment, carrying an orb, which it delivered to Kikyou before joining the others as well.
“Inuyasha…” Kikyou spoke up quietly then, her eyes holding a softness he hadn’t seen in them since her resurrection. “I am told my reincarnation has made a rather bold declaration.”
Oh boy…
“Uh…well you see, Kikyou-”
“Yet you do not seem surprised by her confession.” the undead miko added, cutting him off, which was fine with him since he had no idea what to say in the first place.
Maybe if he avoided the subject directly?
“Well…an old priest two villages over gave Kagome some kind of truth-tea because he thought we were a bunch of bandits, and the stupid runt took advantage of the situation when I got your summons, asking Kagome questions she couldn’t help but answer. It ain’t her fault, really.” he supplied, knowing how jealous of Kagome Kikyou could get, and wanting to assure his first love that her reincarnation hadn’t deliberately been trying to come between them.
“That merely excuses why her words were not left unspoken, yet also reinforces the sincerity behind them. It also does not explain your lack of surprise, unless one were to assume you had already known of her feelings for you.”
“Kikyou…” he sighed, truly at a loss for what to say.
“Yet, she remains unaware of your feelings for her.”
For the second time that night, Inuyasha felt like he had been slapped, his eyes frantically searching Kikyou’s for precisely where she was going with this.
“Kikyou, don’t be like this…” he beseeched quietly, not unaware of how he had spoken those same words to Kagome not long ago.
“You never did answer me,” she pointed out nostalgically, as if he had said nothing at all. “When I had asked you if that girl was more important to you than myself.”
“Kikyou…my life is yours.”
“But not your love.” she stated solemnly, and his ears lowered to his head, unable to think of anything to say in denial of her claim.
“That woman-child, that girl who is supposed to be my replacement, she holds your heart, even if she doesn’t know it.”
“Kikyou…” he answered finally, “I do still love you.” he confessed, and his words were truthful. There were many different types of love, after all.
“My feelings for Kagome…” he added after a moment, “They don’t matter. They can’t matter. I am bound to you.”
For a moment, Kikyou smiled, and Inuyasha wasn’t sure how he felt about the expression. It was a twisted combination of the sweet smiles that used to grace her living visage, and a sinister smirk more befitting of one of their enemies.
“Yes…your life does belong to me. In that regard, you are correct.”
Lowering his eyes at her words, Inuyasha was unaware of his pained expression as he silently examined his toes. It seemed like everyone he knew wanted his life for their own; they all wanted to be the one to kill him. Kikyou, Naraku, even his own brother…half-brother…whatever. Kagome was the only one who wanted him to live…even if it wasn’t with her. Though she would gladly welcome him into her life, if he were able. If only it was that simple…
He truly does love that girl… Kikyou thought, all traces of hatred momentarily leaving her as she fully absorbed her latest soul, that of a young maiden who had died peacefully, and in love.
Ah yes, to be young and in love…
It was rather disconcerting, existing off the life-force of others, feeling their emotions, hearing their thoughts, but it was a burden that was hers alone to bear. Most times, the souls she was given were as tormented as her own, and she relished in that hatred, savoring it, saving it, using it to fuel her own, using it in her quest against Naraku. But when she acquired a peaceful soul, like she had just done in that moment, it reminded her of happier times, of what it was like to be free, to be loved. That soul, like a few of her others, would never become tainted by the hatred that fueled her. It was too innocent, too pure…just like Kagome.
Is it so wrong that he should love Kagome as he does? Kikyou sincerely wondered in that moment. After all, she is me, and I am her, no matter how long we both deny it.
The bigger question was, was it truly fair to ask Inuyasha to go to Hell with her, knowing full well that it would not be an eternity shared together, as he believed? How could they share eternity together in Hell, when she would be reincarnated in five centuries, destined to start the cycle all over again? It was clear Inuyasha had never considered that detail, and while Kagome most likely had, she had merely kept it to herself, as she had been doing with all things until suddenly being forced to tell the truth of her feelings against her will. Perhaps another form of destiny at work…
“Inuyasha…” Kikyou spoke softly in that moment, drawing his attention as he hesitantly raised his eyes to meet her own. “You do not wish to remain bound to me in such a manner, do you?” she asked him kindly, smirking to herself as his eyes widened in panic.
“It is my place.” he answered quickly. Too quickly.
“Yes, I did desire your death, once…” Kikyou confessed, regarding him with a curious eye as he slowly processed her words. “But while I am still fueled by my feelings of hatred for you, feelings I died with, I do understand that you had not truly betrayed me.”
Gaping like a fish, Inuyasha was unable to form words as Kikyou continued. “It is only with revenge that my soul may find rest, only with the death of he who killed me. At the time I had demanded such a fate of you, I had still believed it to be your claws that had ended my life. Tell me,” she asked, grinning openly at his astounded expression, “Why do you agree to a fate that all others, including my sister, claim you do not deserve?”
Swallowing the Shikon-sized lump in his throat, Inuyasha suddenly found it very hard to find words, as his mind frantically scrambled to determine whether or not his ‘cute’ ears were playing tricks on him. Finally, he was able to find his voice, as he answered his first love truthfully.
“Because I had failed to protect you. Because if it weren’t for me, Naraku wouldn’t have killed you.”
For once in his life, Inuyasha should not be forced to take the blame for that which was not his doing… the undead miko thought sympathetically.
“But you had been unaware of the bandit Onigumo, to whom I had been tending in secret. His desire to become Naraku was solely for the jewel. You were merely a convenient tool he made use of, a means to an end. Had you not been a part of the equation, Naraku would have simply found another way.”
“Kikyou, what are you saying?”
“My death was not your fault, Inuyasha.”
The hanyou literally took a step back in shock at her words, his mind and heart raging an internal battle, caught somewhere between joy and suspicion. Was this really Kikyou saying these things? As if reading his thoughts, the undead priestess spoke again in that moment, putting any doubt as to her identity out of his mind.
“I do not release you from your pledge, Inuyasha. Your life, such as it is, still belongs to me.”
Closing his eyes, Inuyasha had to fight back his desire to scream. Then what had been the fucking point of that whole damn conversation?!
Smirking, Kikyou let the hanyou stew for a moment longer before continuing. It was amusing, watching him so desperately try to hold in his rage around her. She knew how he and her reincarnation argued and fought on a regular basis. At first she had found it disrespectful, how crude he was to others in general. Then, Kikyou had momentarily thought that the way he treated her reincarnation merely went to prove how much more important she was to him than that woman-child from the future. However, it hadn’t taken her long to realize that their open candor could have meant something else entirely. He felt comfortable around Kagome. He could be himself around Kagome. Kikyou realized in that moment – as was plainly being demonstrated before her as Inuyasha continued to hold his tongue – that he had never truly let his walls down while in her presence. All she had ever wanted was to be the one to heal his heart, but how was she supposed to accomplish such a thing if he had felt he had to be careful with what he said or did in her presence? And now, instead of healing his heart, she was one of the ones most responsible for its continued damage. Pushing her unending feelings of hatred to the furthest corners of her mind, Kikyou clung onto the echoed memories of love she had once felt for Inuyasha. It was so difficult, being a creature born of evil, while still possessing a fundamental knowledge of right and wrong. Truly, she was the monster, not the hanyou before her. Even if it truly no longer bothered her to know that he was suffering, even if she truly couldn’t care less if he were to be miserable for the rest of his days, she would do the right thing, for the sake of her soul, for the sake of Kagome.
After all, she is me…
So long as she looked at it that way, then she was still doing it for herself. Something to look forward to, in her next life.
“As the owner of your life, you will do as I demand of you. You shall continue in your quest to defeat Naraku. You shall be the vessel of my revenge against he who killed me.”
Inuyasha blinked slowly, searching for the trick in her words. He was already going to kill that bastard Naraku for what he did to her! So what made things different, now? Hesitantly, he raised his eyes to meet her own once more, a quietly uttered “Kikyou…?” leaving his lips on a whisper. Just what was she saying?
“Fail in this task, Inuyasha, and I shall seek my vengeance wherever I can. My soul cannot wander this limbo forever. Should you die by Naraku’s hand, I shall take your soul into Hell, as you have already promised me. However, I give you this opportunity to live, while you are alive. I shall not be the one to end your life, and I shall not dictate what you do with your flesh, or whom you share it with.”
His eyes grew wide at those words, a horrible crimson staining his cheeks, though Kikyou continued in her speech unfazed.
“Give me my revenge, avenge my death as he who would have been mine in life, and at the moment this task is completed, your life, and your soul, shall be yours entirely.”
“So…what you’re saying is…” he wished to be sure, “I can be with Kagome, but my soul is still yours until I defeat Naraku. But that after I kill that bastard and avenge your death, then I’m free?”
For an unresting spirit to be willing to make such a compromise, Inuyasha knew he couldn’t take her generosity for granted. Kikyou was, in a sense, a poltergeist that had been given physical form; a spirit in limbo, trapped by the painful memories surrounding its death. She was essentially saying that it was truly Naraku’s death that she required to find peace, and that if he failed to give her that, then he would be tormented with her in the afterlife, as penance for failing to avenge her. He deserved nothing less. However, Inuyasha held no fear that he might fall by Naraku’s hand. He would kill that bastard. He would rip him apart with his own claws if he had to. And when he did, then Kikyou would be avenged, and his life would be his own again. Of course, there was no way that Inuyasha could overlook what Kikyou had not-so-subtly hinted at with regard to his physical life, even before slaying Naraku. His life in his body was his to do with as he pleased even now…it was only his life-force, his soul, that she still held claim to until after he fulfilled his final obligation.
Kikyou did not answer his clarifying question out loud, but the look in her eyes assured him that he understood her perfectly.
“I agree to this.” he stated then, secretly overjoyed. It truly was as he had originally promised her, that he would join her in Hell ‘if that was their fate’. Such a fate would now only be determined based on whether or not he successfully lived passed the fall of Naraku. He no longer had to worry about Kikyou personally being the one to drag is living body into the afterlife, as she had once attempted to do. His life was his until the day he died, and then what became of him would be determined based on whether or not he had successfully avenged her. He could live with that. He would live with that. He would live, and that was the most important detail of all.
I have to tell Kagome…
“Kikyou, you…you don’t know what this means to me.”
“Yes,” she answered him, one last smile ghosting across her lips before her stoic mask was once again firmly in place. “I do.”
I feel no joy for him, but still, I know that I have done the right thing.
It was so difficult, being a creature born of evil, while still possessing a fundamental knowledge of right and wrong.
Watching Inuyasha go, as he raced through the trees back to his friends, Kikyou felt the soul of the maiden within her thank her for her sacrifice. Mentally, the miko snorted. What sacrifice? Truly, it was not as if she had given Inuyasha up forever. She would get him back, in five hundred years.
``````````````````
Inuyasha was so ecstatic to tell Kagome the good news that he didn’t even care about their friends overhearing, as he burst into the clearing shouting happily, “Kagome! You’re not going to believe…”
His words trailed off as it quickly became apparent that the miko in question was absent, as was the slayer’s nekomata companion.
“She went home, didn’t she?” he addressed the slayer knowingly, his good mood only mildly dampened.
Under normal circumstances, Sango would be giving Inuyasha the cold shoulder. He had gone off to see Kikyou again, even knowing how upset it always made Kagome, and she had gone home as a result of her upset. But circumstances were far from normal. He and Kagome hadn’t truly fought, and the slayer suspected it was mostly due to her own embarrassment, and dread over whatever it was Inuyasha had originally wanted to discuss with her upon his return, that had fueled Kagome’s desire to flee through the well this time around. Couple that with how happy he had appeared a few moments prior, before his discovery of Kagome’s absence, and the taijiya knew that whatever he had previously wanted to discuss with Kagome, something had definitely changed since then…and for the better.
“Yes…” Sango decided to answer honestly then. “I think she’s had her fill of being forced to speak her mind, for one day. Perhaps it would be best if you waited until morning before following after her?” she suggested placatingly.
“Nah, fuck that.” Inuyasha answered, though not in a truly hostile manner. “This is the perfect chance for us to talk, when I know she can’t lie to me, or choose not to answer.”
“And just what, pray tell, is it that you wish to discuss with her?” Miroku asked in that moment, his amusement clear.
“Uh…well..i-it ain’t none of your business!” Inuyasha shouted, thoroughly embarrassed as he finally realized how openly giddy he had been acting in front of his friends.
“Has Kikyou released you from your vow?” Sango asked then, eyes wide.
Damn, the slayer always had been too smart for her own good.
“Keh…” Inuyasha muttered, hating the warmth he could feel spreading through his cheeks, as he answered simply, “I just gotta avenge her death against Naraku, and not get myself killed doin’ it. All she wants is Naraku’s death, and then she’ll release her claim on my soul.”
“So your soul is still pledged to Kikyou-sama until she gets her revenge.” Miroku stated. It wasn’t phrased like a question.
“I think that’s fair!” Inuyasha defended quickly. “I don’t care what anybody says. Had I been payin’ closer attention, I woulda known somethin’ was up, and I woulda sensed Naraku being born. If I hadn’t left Kikyou alone, if I’d stayed in the area, then I woulda sensed danger comin’ and I could’ve saved her! It is my place to avenge her death, and she deserves her justice if I fail.”
“And what of Kagome-sama, in the mean time?” Miroku asked then, partially just curious over what Inuyasha really had planned, and partially protective over the girl he had come to think of as a precious little sister of sorts.
“Kikyou only holds claim on my soul, and only if I die before killing Naraku. While I’m alive, she won’t interfere, and I’m free to live my life how I want.”
“And how is that?” spoke a fourth voice not previously part of the conversation. All eyes turned to Shippou in that moment, the boy left forgotten and presumably asleep in Kagome’s sleeping bag.
“Butt out, runt.” Inuyasha stated with a glare, but the two humans at camp were quick to agree with the kitsune.
“Shippou’s right…” Miroku stated in that moment. “I trust your intentions towards Kagome are honorable?”
“K-keh!” he spluttered. “Who d’you think I am, you?” Inuyasha defended. “Of course my ‘intentions’ are ‘honorable’. Feh.”
Giggling quietly at Miroku’s scandaled expression, Sango added, “Just be honest with Kagome-chan, especially since she currently has no choice but to be honest with you. Sometimes, you say things we all know you don’t mean, but they are still hurtful to hear.”
“I…” Inuyasha began, before closing his mouth. Sango was right. Sometimes he did say things he didn’t mean, things that were hurtful…but he wouldn’t do that this time! Would he? Was it possible that something would end up embarrassing him enough that he’d put his foot in his mouth during the most important conversation of his life? The more he thought about it, the stronger the butterflies in his stomach became, with regard to just what, exactly, he planned on saying to Kagome once he saw her. And what if she started crying? He knew he was never any good around tears.
“Maybe Inuyasha needs to drink the tea of truth, and then he’d have to be honest, no matter what!” Shippou piped up in that moment.
Growling under his breath in annoyance, Inuyasha was just about to bop the kid on the head when his fist froze mid-air, and he looked down at the cringing child with wonder.
Hesitantly lowering his arms from above his head, Shippou was stunned at the expression on the hanyou’s face. “Inuyasha?” he voiced quietly.
“I’ll do it.” the inu-hanyou stated in that moment, turning to Miroku. “You know how to make that stuff, right? You’d said before that you knew of the potion, when you said it would be harmless for Kagome to drink it.”
“I…” the houshi started slowly, truly stunned and trying to catch up with what had just happened, before a full-blown grin broke out over his face. “Why, yes! I do indeed know how to brew that tea, and I do believe that Kaede-sama has all of the necessary ingredients already on hand.” Turning to gaze in the kitsune’s direction, he praised, “What a wonderful idea, Shippou.”
The boy puffed his chest with pride.
“There’s just one problem,” Sango spoke up in that moment. “With Kagome-chan gone on Kirara, we don’t all have a way back to Kaede-sama’s village before daybreak.”
“That’s not true!” Shippou chimed in, transforming in a *pop* to his bird disguise. “I can carry one of you.” the kit stated, willing to do whatever it took, including exhaust himself, if it meant making Kagome happy, and Inuyasha confessing his love for her while under the influence of the truth-tea would definitely make Kagome happy.
“Then it’s settled.” Inuyasha stated with conviction, opting to carry Sango, as it would be much less awkward for him, and with the added weight of Hiraikotsu, he feared the slayer with all of her gear would be too heavy for the runt, anyway. Truth be told, he did care for the boy, even if he never showed it. Hopefully he would be able to depart for Kagome’s world immediately after drinking the tea, so that he would not end up being forced to admit to such a thing out loud, although whatever unpleasant ‘side effects’ turned up as a result of this decision, it would be worth it, for Kagome. Carrying Kagome’s backpack and sleeping bag as well, as the girl had left all of her possessions behind during her hasty departure, the hanyou took off in that moment, making sure to keep a pace the fox-turned-bird would be able to keep up with while carrying Miroku. They were still traveling about five times faster than a human could run on their own, and at their current rate, they would make it back to Kaede’s well before dawn.
``````````````````
Five hundred years in the future, the morbidly embarrassed miko was frantically trying to figure out how she could sneak up to her room without alerting any of her family. She wished she had thought of this before hand, but her suddenly showing up at around 11 o’clock at night was bound to arouse suspicion, and she was in no position to dodge any questions regarding what had happened back in the past. Maybe she should just camp out in the well-house until dawn? That thought would be mildly more appealing if she had at least remembered to bring her supplies back with her…or at the very least, her sleeping bag. Finally deciding that it was much too cold and uncomfortable in the well-house without any outdoor bedding, Kagome opened the shed door as slowly and quietly as possible. Stealthfully tiptoeing across the shrine grounds, she made her way to the main house as quiet as a cat demon.
It’s too bad Kirara can’t come through the well, ‘cause then I could just ride her up to my window.
Kagome knew where her mom kept the hide-a-key near the front door, so hopefully she would be able to Ninja her way through the house and up to her room without waking anyone. It was the prospect of somebody already being awake that worried her more than anything else. It was late, but it wasn’t that late. What would she say if somebody caught her?
The truth… she realized begrudgingly.
She couldn’t let herself get caught.
Carefully opening and closing the front door, the miko slipped off her shoes in the genkan, before tiptoeing with sock-clad feet into the rest of the house. So far, so good, it looked like everyone had retired to bed, with not a single light left on in the entire house. Having grown more accustomed to seeing in the dark over the last few months, thanks to night after night of nothing but firelight back in the Sengoku jidai, the fifteen-year-old easily maneuvered around the shadowed forms of her family’s furnishings, until she made her way to the stairs. The stairs…
Oh boy…forgot about this part.
Gulping quietly, she lifted up one foot and very slowly began shifting her weight, cringing at the distinguishable creek of wood that gave way at the change in pressure. Nearly all of the stairs squeaked with age. There was no way she could make it up them silently. Giving up, at least for the time being, Kagome grimaced as the wood beneath her foot protested the removable of her weight as well, before she quickly backpedaled and made her way into the kitchen before somebody peaked downstairs to see whether or not it was just the cat. Where was Buyo when she needed him, anyway? A few well-timed meows would probably enable her to scale the staircase unnoticed. Maybe she should just stay in the kitchen? Maybe, in the morning, she would be able to pretend that she had only just then returned. How long would it take for the tea take to wear off, exactly? Sometimes her grandfather woke up pretty early…
Contemplating whether or not she could pull a chair back to have a seat at the kitchen table without making any noise, so she could at least rest her head on her arms for a little while, it was in that moment that the future-born-miko noticed an out of place piece of paper sitting on the table. That was odd. Her mother always made sure the wooden table was completely spotless before going to bed. Cracking open the fridge door to let in enough light for her to see without alerting her family upstairs to her presence, Kagome glanced down at the piece of paper only to realize in surprise that it was a letter…to her.
Dear Kagome,
I don’t know why, but my Mother’s intuition
is telling me that you will be coming home early,
so I wanted to leave you this note so that you
don’t worry when you come home to find the
house completely empty. You know how your
Jii-chan has been wanting to visit the Sunrise
Shrine on the east coast, so I finally agreed
to take him. Because we will be gone for three
days, Souta is staying at a friend’s house, and
he’s taken Buyo with him for convenience.
There is plenty of food in the fridge, and I’ve
left money in your room for whatever other
supplies you might need. I hope all is well
with your friends in the past, and I hope
your early return wasn’t the result of a
fight. If it was, then know that your family
loves you, honey, and that I have faith
that in the end, everything will work out
as it was meant to. The kami work in
mysterious ways.
~ Love Mama
“Oh…Mama…” Kagome murmured softly upon finishing her mother’s letter. It was dated that morning.
Every once in a while, her mother had always displayed, as far back as she could remember, some amount of borderline sixth sense. The woman had been absolutely frantic the last day her husband had left for work, never to return again. Kagome remembered it well…
But this was hardly the time or place to be dredging up such random, sad memories. Her mother had sensed her early return home, and had left her a letter as a result; a letter that explained how she hadn’t needed to act like a burglar, as she had previously been doing. Rolling her eyes at herself, Kagome closed the fridge door before grabbing her mother’s note and heading back through the house and up to her room, unconcerned about how much noise she made on the stairs. A quick glance in the other bedrooms confirmed the authenticity of her mom’s letter; the house was empty.
The kami work in mysterious ways, indeed… the miko thought as she peeled out of her dusty school uniform and into some clean and fresh smelling pajamas. At least the kami had spared her the embarrassment of having to face her mother’s questions while still under the effects of the tea. What timing. Her grandfather had been wanting to visit that coastal shrine for the last few years. Maybe her mother’s ‘intuition’ went beyond merely writing her a letter.
“Thanks, Mom…” the miko whispered aloud in her quiet room, looking forward to the idea of spending the next two days alone.
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