Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Sassychan ❯ Chapter 16: I know how to read, can you? ( Chapter 16 )
[ P - Pre-Teen ]
By: boyarina 
Anime/Manga: Naruto Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Hentai / Comedy / Romance / Mystery / Supernatural | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 12.23.2006 | Pages: 2 | Words: 1.9K | Visits: 545 | Status: Completed
Anime/Manga: Naruto Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Hentai / Comedy / Romance / Mystery / Supernatural | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 12.23.2006 | Pages: 2 | Words: 1.9K | Visits: 545 | Status: Completed
Author's Notes:
I know I have posted this far far too late in the week...believe me...a LOT of things happened to me, even I couldn't they actually happened. Anwyays, tell you all about them in a story.
DISCLAIMER:
I do not own Naruto. Yes, I am no longer mincing my words.
Sassychan
by Boyarina
Chapter 16: I know how to read, can you?
Tsunade sighed, feeling the burden of the task she's about to embark weighing down on her shoulders. She really should just stop prolonging the moment and get it over with.
"Come here, Uchiha," she said, motioning for him to come closer.
He didn't take heed of her words at first, as he kept on standing there staring at her as though she had grown an extra heard or two.
To say the least, Tsunade is baffled by his reaction. Didn't she just said 'come here'? What's WRONG with that?
....okay, so she maybe she almost had said 'her' earlier which might have caused this reaction to come from Sasuke. But that doesn't count! She didn't even get to finish saying the word! Also, she covered it up real good with her--his, HIS--name.
Ugh, this is getting complicated, just as she had feared; just as she had predicted. Don't you just hate yourself sometimes knowing that you're always right?
"Are you foing to just stand there all day or are you going to make me haul your num all the way here?" she snapped, taking note of how Sasuke's eyes shot to her broken window (yes, the very window pane where Naruto made his exit earlier) and the hug sweat drop that manifested itself on the side of his face.
"You do know, I know I could read, right, Uchiha?" she asked, her voice full of sarcasm, but despite this, she wouldn't go as far as to say that her question though is purely rhetorical. For if in case Sasuke do DOUBT her ability to decipher kanji and understand the meaning of the words that they form, she very much would like to know ALL about it.
Though now that Sasuke is near her--near to the person who do him serious bodiuly harm, might I add--it doesn't seem as though he's gonna be forthcoming with his answer to reassure her.
Oh well, he's probably hiding a nasty surprise there inside his mouth that's why he is keeping it shut.
"You do know as wel that I keep a generous collection of scrolls reagrding important family traditions, seals, CURSES, jutsus, whatnots here with me, dont' you Sasuke-kun?" she asked once again, affecting the air of pure casualness, but stressing on the word 'curses' and giving the Uchiha heir a pointed stare when she had said it.
She knew she a hit a nerve when Sasuke's ever pallid expression turned into astonishment. The corners of his mouth started to spasm, making him appears as though he wanted to say something but couldn't bring himself to do it.
It is beyond doubt now that he is INDEED hiding something NASTY inside of his mouth.
Tsunade smirked. "Yes. I know what you are thinking, but before you say anything, I need for you to raise your arms up."
Like an automaton, Sasuke immediately obeyed. His mind and body probably are both going to shock as he processed the (the startling) information that all of her previous queries are pointing at.
Tsunade knew that going into shock is dangerous and she should actually snap him out of it, but considering that for the meantime, since this numbness is making him all agreeable, she would let him stay in this state until after she's finished with her ministrations.
She ran her eyes up and down his arms, taking note that muscle groups typical for a male are still there. To make sure that that they are not starting to loosen because of the inevitable physcial change, she pinched and squeezed his upper limbs, much lke what what a shopped would do to a meat in a butcher shop.
Satisfied that his arms are going to be fine for a while, she moved on to check his eyes (dilated because of shock), pulse (uneven, again because of shock), chest (no breats yet) and legs (same conditions as arms).
"You still have Sasuke-JR, don't you?" she asked cheekily, watching as Sasuke cartwheeled back to reality mere due her question.
Sasuke spluttered a time or two, then realize that his actions are getting him nowhere, he nodded.
But, still nary a syllable went said.
"Can't you speak, Sasuke?" Tsunade growled, annoyed by the Uchiha's taciturn atittude. If he is hiding something, he better LITERALLY spit it out now. Otherwise, she's going to have to resort to BRUTE force to het him to answer.
"So, for the last time, Sasuke, can-YOU-SPEAK?" Tsunade bit out her words, hoping to incite an answer from the ever mute Uchiha.
The only response that she got, however, is a look of pure consternation that flashed only for a second. Without skipping a beat, he cocked his head on one side and raised his should as if to say: "i dunno..."
A tick started on her left eye as Tsunade felt her ire getting pricked by this one-sided conversation. Truly! It's as though, she's speaking to a stone wall, only WORSE. In the case of the stone wall, in the event that she actually gets around in conversing with it, she'd be able to forgive it's inability to reply back for it has NO mouth, NO tongue, and NO vocal chords!
But this Uchiha has, and he better use it NOW or she's going to MAKE him!
"So?" she prompted again, promising herself that this is the last straw.
When Sasuke coughed, Tsunade eased her anger down a notch. She's gonna try to be in her best disposition now that the Uchiha is beginning to cooperate. After all, if she blows her gasket now, they're definitely gonna have to start on square one.
When Sasuke cleared his throat this time, it took all of Tsunade's monstrous strength so she could stop herself from unleashing her mighty FURY on him. Reminding herself that should she decide to knock the living daylights out of this teen, she'll be knocking out one of the last living Uchiha--the decent one at that.
Besides, it;ll be no fun clobbering him since he doens't have the Kyuubi's healing power not like her Naru-chan punching bug.
When Sasuke coughed for the SECOND TIME around, Tsunade's mind grappled on straws as she fought to remember the song she was taught in her anger management classes with Jiraiya. Slowly breathing in and out, she quickly wadded through all the songs she got stacked in her head, going as fast she as she could in her search.
It's somethings about being pretty and faggots...Tsunade thought her ming spacing out for a bit as she racked her head for that one song she actaully liked in her anger management classes. In fact, she she had liked it soo much that she got last song syndrome for days after learning it.
A light bulb switched on top of Tsunade's head as the lyrics and the rhythm of the song came back to her full force.
I am pretty! I am so pretty! I am pretty and witty and gay!
When Sasuke cleared his throat again, she had hardly noticed it. She's completely immersed in her own HAPPY song.
I am so charming! I'm so charming! There's no one that's as charming as me!
Unable to dapple the surge of serotonin in her blood (happy hormones is what we call it normal people) Tsunade beamed toothily to no one in particular. She would have continued on too with her drunken rhapsody had her mind not registered the fact that Sasuke was SLOOOOWWWLLLYYY backing away from her.
"You stop right there! Uchiha! Otherwise, I'll tell Sakura to haul your things to her parents' house so could sleep with her instead of her staying with you!" she yelled, finally snapping out of her funk.
If Sasuke's face was not looking mortified enough earlier due to her singing, he's definitely looking mortified now.
"What?!" Sasuke exclaimed, incredulous. Well, at least Tsunade saw and somehow believes that it is Sasuke who exclaimed that.
It sure DIDN'T sound like him though.
"Sakura's living with me?" the unusually sounding Sasuke gasped out, "What did I ever do to you???"
Tsunade crossed her arms and glared at him. "I am actually doing you a favor." She sniffed, assuming a front of a person who's extremely been offended. "You should thank me."
"Where's the 'you're doing me a favor' in this?" Sasuke asked, completely aghast.
Tsunade shrugged. "Well, seeing that she's a girl and you're going to be a girl, I think it's the most convenient set-up." She patted herself on the back for being time and time again, the voice of reason.
"Oh, don't worry, Uchiha, I didn't tell that, you know, you're gonna be a girl." she tossed out to reassure Sasuke's growing incredulity.
Looking at him, Tsunade couldn't exactly make out the expressions passing in and out of his face. At one point, he appeared as though he wanted to shrivel up and die, then the next minute he appeared as though he wanted to throttle her instead. Well, whatever it is, he seemed to be EXTREMELY distressed with what she said.
"You didn't tell her?" Sasuke clarified in a forlorn whisper, still in that broken girly pitch she's finally coming in terms with.
Again, Tsunade shrugged, thinking that at least now that his killer intent has passed, she'd grace gim with an answer. Poor kid, looking there all pitiful and all.
"I though it'd be fun for Sakura to find out on her own. Don't you think?" she replied.
Sasuke buried his face in his hands. "Why is it you again that would have to know of my curse?" he wailed out.
Like the cool Hokage that she is, Tsunade flipped one of her pigtails to the back of her shoulders.
"Well, because, as I have mentioned before, I KNOW HOW TO READ and I have a vast collection of scrolls containing information about family jutsus traditions, CURSES and such for all the clans that live here in Konoha." she said matter of factly.
Frowning slightly, she quirked one eyebrow at Sasuke's answering groan (imagine that, she could crease one of her eyebrow to the center and raise the other one above her forehead).
She wasn't all that bad was she?
I know I have posted this far far too late in the week...believe me...a LOT of things happened to me, even I couldn't they actually happened. Anwyays, tell you all about them in a story.
DISCLAIMER:
I do not own Naruto. Yes, I am no longer mincing my words.
Sassychan
by Boyarina
Chapter 16: I know how to read, can you?
Tsunade sighed, feeling the burden of the task she's about to embark weighing down on her shoulders. She really should just stop prolonging the moment and get it over with.
"Come here, Uchiha," she said, motioning for him to come closer.
He didn't take heed of her words at first, as he kept on standing there staring at her as though she had grown an extra heard or two.
To say the least, Tsunade is baffled by his reaction. Didn't she just said 'come here'? What's WRONG with that?
....okay, so she maybe she almost had said 'her' earlier which might have caused this reaction to come from Sasuke. But that doesn't count! She didn't even get to finish saying the word! Also, she covered it up real good with her--his, HIS--name.
Ugh, this is getting complicated, just as she had feared; just as she had predicted. Don't you just hate yourself sometimes knowing that you're always right?
"Are you foing to just stand there all day or are you going to make me haul your num all the way here?" she snapped, taking note of how Sasuke's eyes shot to her broken window (yes, the very window pane where Naruto made his exit earlier) and the hug sweat drop that manifested itself on the side of his face.
"You do know, I know I could read, right, Uchiha?" she asked, her voice full of sarcasm, but despite this, she wouldn't go as far as to say that her question though is purely rhetorical. For if in case Sasuke do DOUBT her ability to decipher kanji and understand the meaning of the words that they form, she very much would like to know ALL about it.
Though now that Sasuke is near her--near to the person who do him serious bodiuly harm, might I add--it doesn't seem as though he's gonna be forthcoming with his answer to reassure her.
Oh well, he's probably hiding a nasty surprise there inside his mouth that's why he is keeping it shut.
"You do know as wel that I keep a generous collection of scrolls reagrding important family traditions, seals, CURSES, jutsus, whatnots here with me, dont' you Sasuke-kun?" she asked once again, affecting the air of pure casualness, but stressing on the word 'curses' and giving the Uchiha heir a pointed stare when she had said it.
She knew she a hit a nerve when Sasuke's ever pallid expression turned into astonishment. The corners of his mouth started to spasm, making him appears as though he wanted to say something but couldn't bring himself to do it.
It is beyond doubt now that he is INDEED hiding something NASTY inside of his mouth.
Tsunade smirked. "Yes. I know what you are thinking, but before you say anything, I need for you to raise your arms up."
Like an automaton, Sasuke immediately obeyed. His mind and body probably are both going to shock as he processed the (the startling) information that all of her previous queries are pointing at.
Tsunade knew that going into shock is dangerous and she should actually snap him out of it, but considering that for the meantime, since this numbness is making him all agreeable, she would let him stay in this state until after she's finished with her ministrations.
She ran her eyes up and down his arms, taking note that muscle groups typical for a male are still there. To make sure that that they are not starting to loosen because of the inevitable physcial change, she pinched and squeezed his upper limbs, much lke what what a shopped would do to a meat in a butcher shop.
Satisfied that his arms are going to be fine for a while, she moved on to check his eyes (dilated because of shock), pulse (uneven, again because of shock), chest (no breats yet) and legs (same conditions as arms).
"You still have Sasuke-JR, don't you?" she asked cheekily, watching as Sasuke cartwheeled back to reality mere due her question.
Sasuke spluttered a time or two, then realize that his actions are getting him nowhere, he nodded.
But, still nary a syllable went said.
"Can't you speak, Sasuke?" Tsunade growled, annoyed by the Uchiha's taciturn atittude. If he is hiding something, he better LITERALLY spit it out now. Otherwise, she's going to have to resort to BRUTE force to het him to answer.
"So, for the last time, Sasuke, can-YOU-SPEAK?" Tsunade bit out her words, hoping to incite an answer from the ever mute Uchiha.
The only response that she got, however, is a look of pure consternation that flashed only for a second. Without skipping a beat, he cocked his head on one side and raised his should as if to say: "i dunno..."
A tick started on her left eye as Tsunade felt her ire getting pricked by this one-sided conversation. Truly! It's as though, she's speaking to a stone wall, only WORSE. In the case of the stone wall, in the event that she actually gets around in conversing with it, she'd be able to forgive it's inability to reply back for it has NO mouth, NO tongue, and NO vocal chords!
But this Uchiha has, and he better use it NOW or she's going to MAKE him!
"So?" she prompted again, promising herself that this is the last straw.
When Sasuke coughed, Tsunade eased her anger down a notch. She's gonna try to be in her best disposition now that the Uchiha is beginning to cooperate. After all, if she blows her gasket now, they're definitely gonna have to start on square one.
When Sasuke cleared his throat this time, it took all of Tsunade's monstrous strength so she could stop herself from unleashing her mighty FURY on him. Reminding herself that should she decide to knock the living daylights out of this teen, she'll be knocking out one of the last living Uchiha--the decent one at that.
Besides, it;ll be no fun clobbering him since he doens't have the Kyuubi's healing power not like her Naru-chan punching bug.
When Sasuke coughed for the SECOND TIME around, Tsunade's mind grappled on straws as she fought to remember the song she was taught in her anger management classes with Jiraiya. Slowly breathing in and out, she quickly wadded through all the songs she got stacked in her head, going as fast she as she could in her search.
It's somethings about being pretty and faggots...Tsunade thought her ming spacing out for a bit as she racked her head for that one song she actaully liked in her anger management classes. In fact, she she had liked it soo much that she got last song syndrome for days after learning it.
A light bulb switched on top of Tsunade's head as the lyrics and the rhythm of the song came back to her full force.
I am pretty! I am so pretty! I am pretty and witty and gay!
When Sasuke cleared his throat again, she had hardly noticed it. She's completely immersed in her own HAPPY song.
I am so charming! I'm so charming! There's no one that's as charming as me!
Unable to dapple the surge of serotonin in her blood (happy hormones is what we call it normal people) Tsunade beamed toothily to no one in particular. She would have continued on too with her drunken rhapsody had her mind not registered the fact that Sasuke was SLOOOOWWWLLLYYY backing away from her.
"You stop right there! Uchiha! Otherwise, I'll tell Sakura to haul your things to her parents' house so could sleep with her instead of her staying with you!" she yelled, finally snapping out of her funk.
If Sasuke's face was not looking mortified enough earlier due to her singing, he's definitely looking mortified now.
"What?!" Sasuke exclaimed, incredulous. Well, at least Tsunade saw and somehow believes that it is Sasuke who exclaimed that.
It sure DIDN'T sound like him though.
"Sakura's living with me?" the unusually sounding Sasuke gasped out, "What did I ever do to you???"
Tsunade crossed her arms and glared at him. "I am actually doing you a favor." She sniffed, assuming a front of a person who's extremely been offended. "You should thank me."
"Where's the 'you're doing me a favor' in this?" Sasuke asked, completely aghast.
Tsunade shrugged. "Well, seeing that she's a girl and you're going to be a girl, I think it's the most convenient set-up." She patted herself on the back for being time and time again, the voice of reason.
"Oh, don't worry, Uchiha, I didn't tell that, you know, you're gonna be a girl." she tossed out to reassure Sasuke's growing incredulity.
Looking at him, Tsunade couldn't exactly make out the expressions passing in and out of his face. At one point, he appeared as though he wanted to shrivel up and die, then the next minute he appeared as though he wanted to throttle her instead. Well, whatever it is, he seemed to be EXTREMELY distressed with what she said.
"You didn't tell her?" Sasuke clarified in a forlorn whisper, still in that broken girly pitch she's finally coming in terms with.
Again, Tsunade shrugged, thinking that at least now that his killer intent has passed, she'd grace gim with an answer. Poor kid, looking there all pitiful and all.
"I though it'd be fun for Sakura to find out on her own. Don't you think?" she replied.
Sasuke buried his face in his hands. "Why is it you again that would have to know of my curse?" he wailed out.
Like the cool Hokage that she is, Tsunade flipped one of her pigtails to the back of her shoulders.
"Well, because, as I have mentioned before, I KNOW HOW TO READ and I have a vast collection of scrolls containing information about family jutsus traditions, CURSES and such for all the clans that live here in Konoha." she said matter of factly.
Frowning slightly, she quirked one eyebrow at Sasuke's answering groan (imagine that, she could crease one of her eyebrow to the center and raise the other one above her forehead).
She wasn't all that bad was she?