Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Unreal Perfection ❯ 'The Battle' or Mary-Sue Struts Her Stuff ( Chapter 3 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: Watarimono 
Kanashimi leads the genin troops into battle against impossible odds...Whatever is our poor lil' Sue to do?
Anime/Manga: Naruto Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 09.05.2005 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.9K | Visits: 229 | Status: Completed
Kanashimi leads the genin troops into battle against impossible odds...Whatever is our poor lil' Sue to do?
Anime/Manga: Naruto Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 09.05.2005 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.9K | Visits: 229 | Status: Completed
Author's Note: Hiya! Welcome to Chapter 3 of this Suetastic horror. To clarify things, the first-person POV belongs to Sakura this time around. Thank you.
---
The odds were hopeless. For some reason, every villain imaginable was drawn to Konoha like a moth to a flame, at least for today. Must've been that Kanashimi girl...Damn, she's annoying. And a freak. (DIE FREAKS!) Just who does she think she is? Waltzing in here, taking my boyfriend...I can always deam, can't I? On top of that, she's just so--so PERFECT! I swear, she doesn't use a drop of makeup! And her hair is like a rainbow! Also, it makes me wondering just how she can be such a 'great, stealthy shinobi' when her hair's a flaming beacon and she's got a chest that can suffocate a man. No wonder the boys were all staring at her...She's stare-worthy, I'll give her that, and no more.
So anyways, I was caught in this crowd of students who were, like, 12. What, did the adults decide that Orochimaru wasn't a threat, and just send us out after him? Ugh...And our leader, three guesses who, was none other than; Kanashimi, in all of her glorious perfection! (How do I remember her name?!) Getting to the point, we were marching towards our doom, completely OK with the fact that we were fatally screwed.
"Remind me, why are we following that strange girl up there?" Shikamaru asked Chouji, gesturing towards Kanashimi as they trampled along after her, lagging behind in a crowd of one hundred-odd ninjas.
"Beats me." Chouji replied, crumpling up his trademark potato chip bag and tossing it over his shoulder as he finished the last chip. "I'm not sure why we're even bothering, since she did just kill two people out of the blue..." Shikamaru nodded apathetically and grumbled about how bothersome murderers were when a small fight broke out in their midst.
"Admit it, you like her!" Naruto said tauntingly, glaring at Sasuke with every ounce of Intimidating Kyuubi Fury (tm) that he could muster. "I saw the way that you were looking at her after she kissed Neji...I have eyes, you know." The angsty Uchiha boy returned the glare with his own sulky resentment that managed to drive Konoha's female population wild.
Naruto seems to have been transformed into some babbling idiot, or at least more so than usual. What's up with him? It's like he can't tell his head from his ass anymore! Did he drink Windex? Breathe in helium? Something? Please say it's something else...I don't want him to be telling the truth.
"You lie." Sasuke grumbled, shuffling a little bit farther away from Naruto. "I was just...Just disturbed by the fact that she had cat ears and a tail, that's all. TWO tails, no less. And her Sharingan reminded me of Itachi..." At this he trailed away, allowing the tragic, heart-rending music to begin and allowed most of the surrounding nin to wonder what he was babbling on about, while the others merely stopped and gaped in suprise as the mewling of violins filtered randomly down from the heavens. Kanashimi then turned to speak from them, amber eyes gleaming with anticipation and anxiety.
"I can see them at the village gates! We must approach with caution..." She said, voice bold and spirit strong. "Please, try not to hurt too many of them. I don't want to hurt anyone anymore, so have mercy...Their leader is my beloved father, after all." At this, she paused to wipe a single glistening tear from her eye as nearly everyone gave a ridiculously choreographed 'Awww...' in unison. Meanwhile, at the gates of Konoha, Kanashimi's beloved father was giving a speech of the exact opposite kind.
I'm gonna have to agree with Orochimaru on this, since he finally deserves the benefit of the doubt here. I don't care what he did to my precious Sasuke, this is just unfair, even for someone as screwed-up and evil as he is.
"Prepare yourselves!" Orochimaru cried, raising his sword as he raced in front of the entire Akatsuki, (who were merely a large group of moving shadows with sinister, glowing eyes) Otonin, and a massive legion of ANBU, in what looked like a pep rally from Hell. "I saw them advancing, so they obviously know of our presence. Don't worry about the genin, as your main goal is to destroy their leader...Trust me, you'll know her when you see her. And don't worry if you have to kill her at the cost of this village; I'd actually prefer it if you disposed at her and destroyed this place in the process." A few soldiers in the crowd cheered at the prospect of this. Raising their weapons, the massive army gave a loud, triumphant cry and charged ahead, ready for battle.
And here's where I relized, 'Aw crap, we're screwed! There's at least five hundred of them--Scratch that, one thousand--And only one hundred of us. Simply put, we're doomed.' But fortunately we were saved by Kanashimi!
...I would have rather died compared to the melodrama that she carried out for us to watch.
Kanashimi turned her back on the group of genin, mithril-like tears gleaming in her light violet eyes as she drew her Trust Blade from its ruby-studded sheath. She walked to the gates, and grasped two of the bars in her delicate paws. Bracing herself, she turned to face the crowd of young ninjas again.
"You stay here," she said quietly, her perfect tears sliding gracefully down her ivory, perfectly formed face. "I must go alone. They'll simply destroy you if you come. I--I couldn't bear that...so many have died already on my account." She gazed at Sasuke with her sky blue orbs, a tight smile on her tear streaked face. "The ones I love," she broke off, ducking her head as the flow of pure water from her eyes increased, "always seem to get hurt." She bravely looked back at Sasuke and pulled him close, whispering into his ear. "I will come back for you, this I swear. I will not let us be seperated by this." When she pulled away, Sasuke's dark eyes were wet with twelve years of unshed tears.
I have never seen Sasuke cry, and I've been around him for nearly all my life. You can say I was a bit shocked when I saw him standing there in a pool of his own tears, still blubbering away like an idiot. He made Naruto look like a genius by comparison. I wanted nothing more than to put my arms around him and comfort him, but I couldn't move! It was like some strange force was locking my feet onto the ground...I just know Kanashimi was to blame for this, with her s00per special powers. And I could've had a good cuddle with Sasuke too...
Turning around for the final time, she threw the gates opened, and marched forth to face the enemy alone. When she was only ten paces away, Sasuke gripped his hands into fists and cried "Kanashimi, I will not let you do this!!" He ran foward, but Kanashimi gulped down another chest-wrenching sob and held out her hand, and Sasuke was instantly thrown backwards as if he had run full-long into a trampoline. He was propelled, shocked, back behind the gates, which shut and locked themselves.
You know, it was kind of ominous being locked in. It was like Beauty and the Beast with the self-closing gates...Three guesses who the beauty was, and the first two don't count.
"No, Sasuke..." she whispered, biting her lip. Shaking back her wheaten hair, she looked straight ahead, into the face of certain death, and felt no fear, only a cold revolution as her strength and anger hardened into a white bar of bravery. Raising the Trust Blade above her head, she felt the first drops of icy rain fall onto her face. Mother, she thought, looking at the stormy sky, I will avenge you!
As the younge ninjas watched, helpless behind the locked gates, the small girl's frame seemed to glow shimmering gold as her chakra welled inside her, so immense that her miniscule form could hardly hope to contain it. She threw back her river of black hair and screamed in pain, as the energy ripped and tore threw her body, seeming to destroy it from the inside out as the light shot towards the heavens. Slowly, the shimmering waves sank back into her body, and once all eyes adjusted, they saw her bring her pale arms down, now painted with ebony black tattoos.
Wait, wait, wait! Wasn't this girl's chakra BLUE earlier? And where did the rain come from? It was perfect, sunny weather just a few minutes ago.
"Father," she whimpered to herself, blood dripping off her angular face, "I'm so sorry..." She put her hands together in the sign of the Phoenix and raised them above her head, screaming in a fit of sorrowful rage "ART OF THE TSUKIAKARI NO ZETSUMEI!!!" The tattoos on her hands glowed white, and for a minute, eyeryone let the angel-robe white light wash over them, soothing them, then they all fell to the ground, dead, except for Orochimaru and Itachi. Orochimaru looked at the girl in horror and...something else...was that love in the man's eyes?
Mine EYES! If she was going to pull some big dramatic move, she could have at least warned us to bring sunglasses! (Lucky Shino.) I still have spots dancing in front of my eyes from it.
Itachi looked at Kanashimi, undertanding in his eyes, and his icy heart full to bursting with the strangest feeling...He wanted to be by her, he needed her. With a timid look, he said, holding out his hand bespeachingly to the young girl who had stolen his heart, "My fair lady, you have stolen my heart away. Your beauty has melted my icy heart, given it new warmth that I haven't felt since..." His voice trailed off.
"Alas, Braveheart, for we cannot be together. I have given my heart--foolishly, some might say--to another man, and he holds it tight within his grasp, so hard I find I scarce have the strength to breathe when I look at him. If only I had met you first, we might have been happy." She turned away, dark maroon chakra swirling around her arms, legs, and beautiful, smooth face, healing the deep cuts and replacing lost blood. Silently, she walked back into Konoha, the gates opening for her...when suddenly a hand grasping her shoulder with tight, biting nails.
I cannot believe this. Since when was Itachi not a cold-blooded, heartless killer? And why in the nine circles of Hell is she calling him Braveheart? Who's Braveheart? Is this some big, cruel joke that I'm not a part of, or is this some sort of movie? Well, the girls and I decided to confront this beast, and luckily, they showed up right on time...
---
The odds were hopeless. For some reason, every villain imaginable was drawn to Konoha like a moth to a flame, at least for today. Must've been that Kanashimi girl...Damn, she's annoying. And a freak. (DIE FREAKS!) Just who does she think she is? Waltzing in here, taking my boyfriend...I can always deam, can't I? On top of that, she's just so--so PERFECT! I swear, she doesn't use a drop of makeup! And her hair is like a rainbow! Also, it makes me wondering just how she can be such a 'great, stealthy shinobi' when her hair's a flaming beacon and she's got a chest that can suffocate a man. No wonder the boys were all staring at her...She's stare-worthy, I'll give her that, and no more.
So anyways, I was caught in this crowd of students who were, like, 12. What, did the adults decide that Orochimaru wasn't a threat, and just send us out after him? Ugh...And our leader, three guesses who, was none other than; Kanashimi, in all of her glorious perfection! (How do I remember her name?!) Getting to the point, we were marching towards our doom, completely OK with the fact that we were fatally screwed.
"Remind me, why are we following that strange girl up there?" Shikamaru asked Chouji, gesturing towards Kanashimi as they trampled along after her, lagging behind in a crowd of one hundred-odd ninjas.
"Beats me." Chouji replied, crumpling up his trademark potato chip bag and tossing it over his shoulder as he finished the last chip. "I'm not sure why we're even bothering, since she did just kill two people out of the blue..." Shikamaru nodded apathetically and grumbled about how bothersome murderers were when a small fight broke out in their midst.
"Admit it, you like her!" Naruto said tauntingly, glaring at Sasuke with every ounce of Intimidating Kyuubi Fury (tm) that he could muster. "I saw the way that you were looking at her after she kissed Neji...I have eyes, you know." The angsty Uchiha boy returned the glare with his own sulky resentment that managed to drive Konoha's female population wild.
Naruto seems to have been transformed into some babbling idiot, or at least more so than usual. What's up with him? It's like he can't tell his head from his ass anymore! Did he drink Windex? Breathe in helium? Something? Please say it's something else...I don't want him to be telling the truth.
"You lie." Sasuke grumbled, shuffling a little bit farther away from Naruto. "I was just...Just disturbed by the fact that she had cat ears and a tail, that's all. TWO tails, no less. And her Sharingan reminded me of Itachi..." At this he trailed away, allowing the tragic, heart-rending music to begin and allowed most of the surrounding nin to wonder what he was babbling on about, while the others merely stopped and gaped in suprise as the mewling of violins filtered randomly down from the heavens. Kanashimi then turned to speak from them, amber eyes gleaming with anticipation and anxiety.
"I can see them at the village gates! We must approach with caution..." She said, voice bold and spirit strong. "Please, try not to hurt too many of them. I don't want to hurt anyone anymore, so have mercy...Their leader is my beloved father, after all." At this, she paused to wipe a single glistening tear from her eye as nearly everyone gave a ridiculously choreographed 'Awww...' in unison. Meanwhile, at the gates of Konoha, Kanashimi's beloved father was giving a speech of the exact opposite kind.
I'm gonna have to agree with Orochimaru on this, since he finally deserves the benefit of the doubt here. I don't care what he did to my precious Sasuke, this is just unfair, even for someone as screwed-up and evil as he is.
"Prepare yourselves!" Orochimaru cried, raising his sword as he raced in front of the entire Akatsuki, (who were merely a large group of moving shadows with sinister, glowing eyes) Otonin, and a massive legion of ANBU, in what looked like a pep rally from Hell. "I saw them advancing, so they obviously know of our presence. Don't worry about the genin, as your main goal is to destroy their leader...Trust me, you'll know her when you see her. And don't worry if you have to kill her at the cost of this village; I'd actually prefer it if you disposed at her and destroyed this place in the process." A few soldiers in the crowd cheered at the prospect of this. Raising their weapons, the massive army gave a loud, triumphant cry and charged ahead, ready for battle.
And here's where I relized, 'Aw crap, we're screwed! There's at least five hundred of them--Scratch that, one thousand--And only one hundred of us. Simply put, we're doomed.' But fortunately we were saved by Kanashimi!
...I would have rather died compared to the melodrama that she carried out for us to watch.
Kanashimi turned her back on the group of genin, mithril-like tears gleaming in her light violet eyes as she drew her Trust Blade from its ruby-studded sheath. She walked to the gates, and grasped two of the bars in her delicate paws. Bracing herself, she turned to face the crowd of young ninjas again.
"You stay here," she said quietly, her perfect tears sliding gracefully down her ivory, perfectly formed face. "I must go alone. They'll simply destroy you if you come. I--I couldn't bear that...so many have died already on my account." She gazed at Sasuke with her sky blue orbs, a tight smile on her tear streaked face. "The ones I love," she broke off, ducking her head as the flow of pure water from her eyes increased, "always seem to get hurt." She bravely looked back at Sasuke and pulled him close, whispering into his ear. "I will come back for you, this I swear. I will not let us be seperated by this." When she pulled away, Sasuke's dark eyes were wet with twelve years of unshed tears.
I have never seen Sasuke cry, and I've been around him for nearly all my life. You can say I was a bit shocked when I saw him standing there in a pool of his own tears, still blubbering away like an idiot. He made Naruto look like a genius by comparison. I wanted nothing more than to put my arms around him and comfort him, but I couldn't move! It was like some strange force was locking my feet onto the ground...I just know Kanashimi was to blame for this, with her s00per special powers. And I could've had a good cuddle with Sasuke too...
Turning around for the final time, she threw the gates opened, and marched forth to face the enemy alone. When she was only ten paces away, Sasuke gripped his hands into fists and cried "Kanashimi, I will not let you do this!!" He ran foward, but Kanashimi gulped down another chest-wrenching sob and held out her hand, and Sasuke was instantly thrown backwards as if he had run full-long into a trampoline. He was propelled, shocked, back behind the gates, which shut and locked themselves.
You know, it was kind of ominous being locked in. It was like Beauty and the Beast with the self-closing gates...Three guesses who the beauty was, and the first two don't count.
"No, Sasuke..." she whispered, biting her lip. Shaking back her wheaten hair, she looked straight ahead, into the face of certain death, and felt no fear, only a cold revolution as her strength and anger hardened into a white bar of bravery. Raising the Trust Blade above her head, she felt the first drops of icy rain fall onto her face. Mother, she thought, looking at the stormy sky, I will avenge you!
As the younge ninjas watched, helpless behind the locked gates, the small girl's frame seemed to glow shimmering gold as her chakra welled inside her, so immense that her miniscule form could hardly hope to contain it. She threw back her river of black hair and screamed in pain, as the energy ripped and tore threw her body, seeming to destroy it from the inside out as the light shot towards the heavens. Slowly, the shimmering waves sank back into her body, and once all eyes adjusted, they saw her bring her pale arms down, now painted with ebony black tattoos.
Wait, wait, wait! Wasn't this girl's chakra BLUE earlier? And where did the rain come from? It was perfect, sunny weather just a few minutes ago.
"Father," she whimpered to herself, blood dripping off her angular face, "I'm so sorry..." She put her hands together in the sign of the Phoenix and raised them above her head, screaming in a fit of sorrowful rage "ART OF THE TSUKIAKARI NO ZETSUMEI!!!" The tattoos on her hands glowed white, and for a minute, eyeryone let the angel-robe white light wash over them, soothing them, then they all fell to the ground, dead, except for Orochimaru and Itachi. Orochimaru looked at the girl in horror and...something else...was that love in the man's eyes?
Mine EYES! If she was going to pull some big dramatic move, she could have at least warned us to bring sunglasses! (Lucky Shino.) I still have spots dancing in front of my eyes from it.
Itachi looked at Kanashimi, undertanding in his eyes, and his icy heart full to bursting with the strangest feeling...He wanted to be by her, he needed her. With a timid look, he said, holding out his hand bespeachingly to the young girl who had stolen his heart, "My fair lady, you have stolen my heart away. Your beauty has melted my icy heart, given it new warmth that I haven't felt since..." His voice trailed off.
"Alas, Braveheart, for we cannot be together. I have given my heart--foolishly, some might say--to another man, and he holds it tight within his grasp, so hard I find I scarce have the strength to breathe when I look at him. If only I had met you first, we might have been happy." She turned away, dark maroon chakra swirling around her arms, legs, and beautiful, smooth face, healing the deep cuts and replacing lost blood. Silently, she walked back into Konoha, the gates opening for her...when suddenly a hand grasping her shoulder with tight, biting nails.
I cannot believe this. Since when was Itachi not a cold-blooded, heartless killer? And why in the nine circles of Hell is she calling him Braveheart? Who's Braveheart? Is this some big, cruel joke that I'm not a part of, or is this some sort of movie? Well, the girls and I decided to confront this beast, and luckily, they showed up right on time...