Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ A Soldier's Duty ❯ They're all idiots ( Chapter 5 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

A Soldier's Duty

Fourth Labor, chapter 5

"They're all idiots." - Ruri Hoshino, Nadesico


-------

The meeting had predictably broken up.

Usagi was predictably upbeat. Princess Serenity had been united with her father. And it had only taken 10,000 years (more or less) to do it! Now if only Ami could teach him Japanese!

Luna walked home with Minako, particularly as Artemis had walked off with Makoto for some odd reason. Both had long conversations that were meant to be subtle placing of hints that, gee, wouldn't it be nice if there was someone around who could pick up that nice young Knight after Ami dumped him.

Ami had walked home, deep in thought, still adding and subtracting from the minus and plus columns. Like Makoto, she would prefer a taller boy. Like Minako, she'd prefer a handsome boy. Like Rei, she'd prefer a *Japanese* boy. On the other hand, he *was* nice and his talents were (like her own) handy in a support role. And so on she went, adding things into the plus and minus columns. Thinking of the whole sordid mess as a logic problem.

Mamoru ran across (not literally, thankfully) Usagi and mentioned that he had fulfilled Japanese tradition in one respect - by getting her father's permission to court his daughter. Usagi reacted to this in exactly the sort of manner one would expect and managed to get some quality snuggling time in. During which time a tear from Usagi touched her transformation brooch and restored it, getting her the Spiral Heart Moon Rod. Cue more intense snuggling time.

Kumori Mizuno decided her daughter was old enough, it was bound to happen with those two lovebirds anyway, and bought Ami a "family planning kit." Naturally, she didn't say a word to anyone else about it. Nurses being nurses, the story made the rounds anyway. About Mizuno-sensei's daughter and that gaijin doing THAT. Some of the hospital employees were sympathetic, some envious, some decided that the next time the girl came by she'd get a few "gifts" and advice.

Minako realized that she'd forgotten completely about her father's talk with her. Ami had dumped Grey-san, and he'd STILL been that nice to her. So, if a girl were actually responsive to things like affection... gee. He wasn't tall. He wasn't handsome. He wasn't Japanese. However, he *was* available. And it would be for the good of the team if the Senshi of Love scored a boyfriend! Or something like that.

In other words, there wasn't much happening in Azabu Juuban at the moment. Unless you happened to be at the Tokyo Tower that is.

---------

"-It's the bloody Eiffel Tower!-" Grey looked it over. Near as he could tell it was to scale. "-What is it with the Japanese? If they like something they copy it and make it theirs?-"

Hotaru opened her mouth to protest, thought about it, then shrugged. She hadn't understood everything he'd said anyway.

A TV next to a food pushcart near the Tower entry caught Grey's eye. "-A Godzilla movie? Dang, the special effects are *really* good on that one!-"

Hotaru glanced that way, neither noticing it was CNN, her stomach rumbling again as the scent of roasted ears of corn reached her.

Grey sighed. With the price of food the way it was, his savings were getting a merciless beating. Still, he paid the money. ($6.95?!) Then motioned to a bench. "So, Tomoe-san, you come with me? Friend is doctor. Speak she better also Japanese." He didn't think he'd be able to get much in the way of details out of her. Her English wasn't very good, and he knew darn well that his attempts to speak Japanese were causing stoic Japanese businessmen to wince.

Hotaru blushed, thinking all sorts of things involving princes riding up on white horses. Okay, he wasn't a *handsome* prince. And they were both walking. But where else could she go?

"AAAAAA! It's a monster!"

Grey blinked and held up a hand. "Right back be I will. Stay you here?!"

--------

Hotaru nodded, a little puzzled. Then watched the boy limp off quickly towards a porta-john. Then she saw the monster. It was... pretty tacky looking actually. Sort of a woman wearing a weird costume, looking vaguely like something out of a Tarazakura stage production, or maybe a cheesy sentai flick.

The tourists were screaming and running away. The yattai owners were panicking. Hotaru sighed and hid behind a bench. Why couldn't she have a *normal* life?

"MINOTAURA!"

And if she was going to be menaced, couldn't it be something other than a twelve foot tall buxom girl with horns on her head and a tail? Couldn't it be something a little less silly?

Minotaura chose that moment to charge one of the yattai, Hotaru couldn't help but notice that it sold beef bowls, and began smashing the place up. Some idle part of her mind wondered if the cow-girl had lost a relative lately.

*SCHING!*

A dull grey chain whipped out of nowhere, grabbed a flying beef bowl, and set it on the ground in front of Hotaru. This naturally got Hotaru's attention.

The chain shortened again, as a guy in some kind of Musketeer's uniform walked out, adjusted his hat, and said something that sounded like a complaint about "damn uniforms designed for show as opposed to function."

The minotaur girl growled at the guy.

"Don't blame me. i don't eat beef anyway." The guy shrugged. "Stomach problems, what can i say?"

Hotaru had never seen a cow-girl facefault. She felt like doing it herself when the cowgirl imbedded her horns in the concrete and spent a few moments getting herself unstuck.

"i don't expect you'll just quietly go away or let yourself be arrested?" The guy stepped forward and to the right, drawing attention away from the girl behind the bench.

Hotaru blinked between bites of her beef bowl. That limp. That very noticeable limp.

"MIN O TAURA!" The minotaura pawed the ground and lowered her head.

"That sounded like a no. Pity." The guy sounded like he regretted it, continuing to move away from Hotaru. Hotaru blinked as she realized that the chain being dragged on the ground behind the guy was actually lengthening. "Why can't more 'enemies of humanity' be reasonable about the whole thing? Get together, discuss our differences over a cup of hot tea, maybe avoid this whole 'turn into moon dust' thing?"

Hotaru looked behind the guy with the chain and froze. What was that guy with the camera doing?

"Excuse me?"

Grey blinked, having been concentrating on the girl in the minotaur costume. A civilian? "Excuse me, but you really ought to get to..."

*FLASH!*

"...safety... Now THAT wasn't..." The guy started rubbing his eyes.

"TAURA!" The daimon charged across the space, slamming into the guy with the chain and sending him flying. She then trampled the old man with the camera.

Hotaru realized that the cow-girl was looking around for another target. Then nearly coughed up another mouthful of beefbowl as she realized that she was looking for *her.*

"Ouch. Hardly my finest hour." The guy leapt down from where he'd landed. "Eeep!"

Hotaru winced. The guy was limping worse than ever now.

"TAURA!" The daimon glowed briefly, then doubled in size.

"Oh... CRAP!" The guy sent the chain looping out like a tentacle. It repeatedly thwacked against the youma without much apparent effect. "DOUBLE CRAP!"

Hotaru watched as her sempai continued to get beaten on, still trying to draw attention away from her. Wincing at the force of some of those impacts, she wished she could do something. If Hotaru had realized her eyes were beginning to glow purple, she might have been even more concerned.

"dead. scream."

---------

Ami reached the apartment and noticed that Shard-san had not returned yet.

That was all right. Ami had come to a decision on the way. She hadn't been too happy with suddenly being cornered with this engagement. However, even though she apparently had nothing in common with Shard-san, she would give this engagement a try.

Her Sailor Communicator trilled, breaking this line of thought.

"Ami!" Rei's face showed on the display. "Check the TV!"

"What channel," asked Ami, looking for the remote.

"All of 'em! I'm still trying to reach the others! Bye!"

Ami wondered what could be going on. *click* Godzilla movie? Must be a new one, the special effects were pretty good. *click* Another one, except this looked more like a daimon. And fighting it was...

"Nebula-san?!" Ami turned the sound up.

Announcer: "Oooh, would you look at that! The mysterious musketeer has just been kicked into the Tokyo Tower itself. He's returning to the fray. He appears to be trying to lead the monster into an... oh! Now he's been trampled under her hooves. Oh, that's GOT to hurt! Now the mysterious youth is being slung around like a rag doll! Ohh! Another devastating wrestling move from Ms Youma!"

Announcer#2: "Can we have an instant replay and close up? That's blood from the boy's mouth, Shiro. This fight is almost over! Clearly a *very* disappointing showing from the Good Guys."

Announcer #1: "Well, he *is* kind of young. Oh dear. Thrown through a port-a-potty. Well, look at it this way, young hero. Your career can only go up from here!"

Announcer #2: "Wait a minute, an ally has appeared! It's a woman in a *very* short skirt. Can we get a close up of this?"

Ami blinked, her transformation pen out and ready to be used. Except that getting to the Tokyo Tower, with traffic the way it was now, was likely to take at least twenty minutes. And what the heck was going on *now*?!

-------

A 50ft long reptillian beast went through the city of Reyjavik in Iceland much in the manner of countless Japanese monster movies. Most of the other stories were dismissed as "Supermarket Tabloid" tales, but the wreckage and destruction caused by the "Reyjavik Dinosaur" were sufficient to get on CNN. Paleontologists were quick to point out that it was *not* a dinosaur, but everyone pretty much ignored them.

A set of monkeylike creatures infested the tunnels beneath Paris. They became the center of debate between groups that wanted them killed, wanted them studied, or wanted them captured and released into their natural habit. It was also discovered that while they ate "everything" they came across, their digestion was not up to handling a lot of typical French food. Many died from intestinal gas, the rest adapted.

The New York wyverns had settled into Central Park and were now the subject of similar debate.

The Wizard looked at the reports from the various news agencies and frowned slightly. The gibberlings he'd expected to be wiped out. Not become a political argument between environmentalists and other special interest groups. The Lemurian Hydra had been killed, and used as an excuse by the Chinese to move a few tanks in prior to the British handing over Hong Kong to the mainland.

The spiders were being hunted down rapidly in Liverpool. Axes and clubs worked fine on them.

So far, the only one that had gone as planned was the Tarrasque, and IT would go dormant soon. The creature did massive amounts of damage but was only active for one week out of fifty years. Not that it would last *that* long. The summoning spell used for it didn't last more than a day.

Of the basilisks and stalker, there was not a peep on any news channel.

Clearly, harsher measures would need to be taken.

The Wizard considered the Eggs of Daimon briefly. What would happen if one combined an Egg of Daimon with a summoned monster? The idea had taken hold and he'd conducted an experiment using a simple cow. So far, the results seemed... interesting.

And if a cow had proven so entertaining, then what if he used something more powerful to begin with. Or even... The Professor looked at where Mimette was imbedded in the wall. Perhaps if she failed him again.

---------

Sailor Pluto dodged the charging minotaur, whose momentum took the daimon entirely through a parked bus.

"Puu-chan!" Nebula limped to a position nearby, not noticing the effect her pet-name had on the Senshi of Time. "She's too tough to beat with simple attacks. Do you remember that combined manuever we worked out?"

Sailor Pluto flushed slightly. The night before Serenity had commanded her to guard the Gate of Time and let no one near. When she'd been held in his arms, and they had... practiced attacks. She'd estimated that in another two nights, at most, the Knight would have been ready to share rather more than his friendship. Sailor Pluto nodded, hoping that her backup plan would work.

Nebula wondered why Pluto was blushing. Well, they *had* gotten rather close then. Too bad she had gone off to guard the Time Gate. He'd obviously misunderstood her prior to that, because if she had been serious about the relationship she would have at least left a letter. Or sent one.

"TIME!" Pluto held her staff up, summoning power around her.

Nebula stepped close to the Time Senshi and sent a loop of chain around the staff. "CUTTER!"

Minotaura shrugged aside the pieces of bus, noticing that there was a moon-crescent shaped blade heading towards her. She blocked.

The blade cut through Minotaura's arm, punched through her chest, and finally emerged on the far side. "Baka na..."

The daimon dissolved, leaving a thoroughly confused cow.

Sailor Pluto relaxed slightly. Time to go, she still had so much to do...

"Puu-chan?"

The voice caused the calm, confident, dignified, mysterious Wielder of the Time Staff to resist the sudden urge to throw herself crying into a certain individual's arms. Only the cameras and their age/height discrepancies stopped her though.

"i'm so glad you survived, Puu-chan. Oh, sorry, Sailor Pluto." Nebula finished retracting the Chain. "You probably don't remember me that well."

Sailor Pluto smirked. "Better than you might think."

Nebula looked off to the side. "Why didn't you write? No, never mind. Presumptuous of me. Let's get together soon when the crowd of camera-pushers aren't present, shall we?"

Sailor Pluto nodded, hope flaring brightly within her heart as she stepped within the space of a few seconds. She was still his "Puu-chan"? Better than she had expected.

Nebula hobbled off at high speed, well, relatively. Grey emerged from the bushes to limp near Hotaru.

"Well, Hotaru-chan, time we go now is. Doctor get you to."

Hotaru looked over the boy, wondered where he stored that chain or those silly clothes, and nodded. She'd have to talk to him about that, maybe something in spandex.

--------

Ami sat down. That had been her fiance. Being beaten silly. By a silly looking youma. Thinking about it, most of their enemies *had* been powerful but tacky at the very least. Ami had a sudden vision of Queen Beryl, but instead of trying to destroy the world, trying to force people to wear really bad fashions. Then shook her head, wondering if it was from seeing her fiance beaten on...

internationally broadcast TV?! Oh dear.

Her Sailor Communicator started trilling again. This time Ami Mizuno, Sailor Mercury, decided not to answer it. Let the others get the post-fight analysis out of their system. Ami needed a nice cool swim to relax and think things over. Yes, that sounded nice.

--------

Grey wondered WHAT all the whispering from the nurses was about. Or why Hotaru looked shocked at some of things being said.

"-Ah, Grey-san. Good to see you, who's your little friend?-" Kumori Mizuno was, by specialty, a pediatrician. Therefore she immediately started diagnosing the moment she saw the little Goth girl.

"-Hotaru Tomoe. i don't understand her too well, but apparently she's been on the streets homeless since some sort of explosion destroyed her home.-"

Kumori considered that for a moment, then started talking to the little girl in rapid Japanese that Grey couldn't follow. As he was gently shoved out the door so that the doctor could examine her patient, it was just as well.

He spent a lot of time fidgeting, looking over the magazines in the waiting area, and noting that they seemed to be the same boring sort that were in doctor's lobbies in the US. Perhaps it was one of those Universal Unwritten Laws?

After Grey had been fidgeting for some time, some nurse walked up, winked at him, and handed him a plain brown wrapper. Inside were two books. Hmmm. Well, he'd look them over later.

"-Ah, Grey-san, would you mind coming in here?-"

Hearing the doctor's voice again, Grey entered. Hotaru was blushing and studying her shoes, whereas Doctor Mizuno was looking... amused and concerned?

"-First off, Grey-san, I take it this is another of your friends from the previous life?-" Mizuno-sensei sat back against the desk and smiled at the little girl.

"-i think so. Though i can't place her. There's also something dark and nasty associated with her, but it seems to be sleeping for now. She may have been with the Enemy.-" Grey considered briefly. "-However, she's currently *not* an enemy. Just a little girl who apparently has gotten mixed up in all this.-"

"-Well, she was apparently didn't eat for a day, then had too much to eat all at once. She's having some indigestion as a result. She spent the night outside, and is running a slight fever. I'd want to keep her overnight, but there might be questions asked that would be awkward for you and my daughter.-"

"-Actually, i'd like to suggest keeping her overnight. Tomorrow i can ask one of Ami's friends to keep an eye on her, until we find out more at least. Maybe Sailor Moon can heal her.-"

Doctor Mizuno tried not to pounce on that. If Sailor Moon were, as she certainly suspected now, one of Ami's friends, and Sailor Moon could *heal* people. It would certainly be something to study. Just studying the before and after on a patient could provide clues as to healing diseases with more conventional methods. "-Uhm, yes, I suppose that might be so. After you do, well, maybe I should check her over again.-"

"-Well in that case.-" Grey winced as he put pressure on his leg again. "-Actually, the way this leg is getting stiff, i think i'd better call it a day and working on that chi trance stuff some more. Oh, and if i may. i think Ami's going to be late with her friends tonight. Mind if i make some dinner?-"

"-Go ahead. Ami could use a break from sandwiches.-" Doctor Mizuno said, switching to Japanese and addressing the little girl. "Hotaru-chan, Grey-san here is going to take you home overnight. We'll try to work out other arrangements tomorrow."

Hotaru blinked shyly and considered her feet, nodding. "Thank you, doctor. I, eh, really don't want to be alone right now."

"That's okay, dear. My daughter should be home by now and can help keep you company." ~It'll do her some good to be around patients, and the two lovebirds could use a chaperone for now.~ The doctor wondered briefly about Hotaru's look of disappointment, but decided that the ten year old just had a crush on her savior. She'd grow out of it, of course.

"Go we should, Hotaru-chan." Grey wondered why the doctor winced and Hotaru blushed. Had he mangled that short phrase or encountered another double meaning? Why did Japanese have to be so difficult?!

--------

Elsewhere:

The Heart of Darkest Chocolate was a happy place.

A kind fairy had (in order to pay off a tremendous bill of sweetened sugar plums) remade the fairly drab original building into a three layer structure in the shape of an ice cream sundae - Chocolate flavored. With sprinkles.

The first floor was where most of the casual business was done. Where Skuld or someone (there were surprisingly many like her) absolutely *had* to have their dose before they could go on with their lives or busy schedules. This level and the grounds beyond had been sculpted as the bowl for this three story concoction. With walls made out of clear crystal it was about as bright as the drow proprietress could easily stand, and done up in themes not unlike a soda bar back from the days on Earth when jerk meant the man who pulled the lever to mix the Coca Cola in the glass with the lemon flavoring and charged you a nickel.

Edema's den (being the owner she chose which areas she wanted to work and got the odd young Valkyrie or heroine or Spirit to help out on the first floor) was up an easy ramp (to accommodate those races without easy use of stairs). This, the second level, was easier on her eyes by nature of the chocolate covered glass that made up the walls. Here there were tables and setups for the customers that wanted to linger longer than Skuld crowd of "breeze in, chow down, pay up and scram out."

By nature of the darker light it was also something of a lover's meeting place, with enough other traffic to keep the nuzzling down to mainly hands held and soft gazes over the tops of heaping bowls of frosty pleasure - which the drow proprietress preferred as it kept the odd outraged godly parent from blowing her shop to smithereens in a fit a pique. It would be a pain to rebuild it as regularly as, for example, the Raging Wombat Tavern.

The third level was reserved for special customers. Considering the number of gods, servants of the Most High, goddesses, messengers, giants, fairy, heroes, and whatnot that breeze by and consider only the best their due (though not as many as you'd think, there were classier places and Edema preferred a little milder group of key clientele), she'd found early on that advertising that the third floor was special only guaranteed that it would be crammed full of ego cases that on the whole she didn't like.

Thus the third floor was named the Spare Linen and Wash Room.

No walking ego worth the name would demand to be seated in the Spare Linen and Wash room, nor were any heroes likely to lurk there, as this wasn't the hideout of an Evil Villain. Edema lived almost nine blocks away and her home was listed quite openly and had flower deliveries three times a day (once before she left for work, so she could drop them off with children she met on the way, once after she left work for the same reason while she took strolls in local parks, and a last one so she could freshen her window boxes and vases throughout the house. The last hero to sneak in had developed an allergy to pollen and had to leave for six weeks sick vacation).

A kind goddess had even staked a 'Not An Evil Villain' sign near the front porch for her, to cut down on any misunderstandings.

Thus, Edema's private room was almost that: Private. Anyone clever enough to figure out that, in spite of the top level being called the Spare Linen and Wash Room it was *also* a special place where Edema invited her most treasured friends and thus possibly the best room in the store, were quite clever enough to figure out that if they weren't invited they weren't welcome. And if not they would listen to an explanation.

Mostly.

The drow sorceress was relaxing on the lush cushions of a bowl-shaped loveseat, bathed in the multicolor glow from the colored sprinkles the fairy had embedded in the chocolate brown dark walls. Fountains and waterfalls fell musically into pools lit by bright spots of rainbow light from those same sprinkles, and the red glow of the cherry atop the building mixed to make exactly the sort of spot Edema herself luxuriated in. Sensual and Sweet.

Eating a parfait she could close her eyes and imagine she was owner of Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory (Heaven, Third Layer, Childrens' Paradise Division, next door to Candyland. She bought many of her supplies there).

Edema's eyes tightened as she recalled and tried to forget again *why* it was she was in here. The latest load of barbarians had come in fresh from dying heroically burning their neighbors and just been dropped off by the Valkyries. Due to a misunderstanding about local laws they'd asked immediately on their arrival where they could get a drink and had unfortunately asked one of the Sugar Plum Fairies. It turned out they'd no sooner hefted a mug than well over half had been revealed to have horrible sweet teeth that needed a lifetime's worth of remedying.

There was a limit to how rowdy a group of hairy northern barbarians could get on milkshakes, but their singing was getting on her nerves.

A flame-haired head poked in, grinning triumphantly. "Hello there."

Edema frowned, pouting in good southern style, and lazily hefted a finger his way and back toward the door. "Dahlin, the 'Good Time' y'all promised to have heah nevah included seein little ol' me. Git outta heah. Ah need mah privacy." The accent was heavy as this kind of intrusion was welcomed less than usual. It had, after all, been the sort of day where that tiny little knot of tension was forming that irritating ache just above and between her shoulder blades.

His eyes sparkled in that way that just advertised he felt by obeying he could tease her more than staying, but before he could withdraw she'd caught that and stated. "Stop. Ah changed mah mind. What's on yer mind, Sugar?"

Eyes twinkling, the Pheonix Mage stepped more fully through the wall into her sanctum and, hands held behind his back, began an exaggerated stroll through the room as if screaming that he had a secret that he was just *dying* to relay. "Oooh, nuthing much. Just completed a little trip to the Abyss, that's all."

Golden eyes in a dark face under white hair went slitted.

The Mage wasn't to be rushed. He seated himself opposite her and took a spoonful out of a pudding dish he'd purchased downstairs on his way up, licking the flavor around inside his mouth for as long as her thin patience could be played with.

He spoke just a moment before she could, his eyes dancing. "Had a little errand. You see, back in mortality I'd long ago made a rather frivolous wish that earned me the undying enmity of Lolth. A little matter of sunlight spilling into all the drow caverns at an inconvenient time and just happening to wipe out all drow civilization on my planet of origin."

Having him intrude into her private sanctum in order to brag about destroying large segments of her race didn't improve her mood even slightly. Even if the line about sunlight slaying them indicated that these drow weren't of her own variety.

Teasing was suspended and his gaze melted to gaze softly and full of kindness upon her. "I hear you'd had your own run ins with agents of that witch."

The kindness was unexpected, less so from him. She was taken aback but Edema rallied quickly.

"So I though you might like to know I killed her." The Mage finished idly, with a shrug and mild tone that *almost* succeeded in disguising his statement as one of no consequence.

Before Edema could pick her jaw up out of her parfait on the table the Pheonix Mage had removed a heavily enchanted slender dagger of elvan work from out of his robes and slid it hilt-first across to her. "I shattered her soul amulet with that dagger. Now my gift to you."

Edema was sputtering, trying to sit upright in her overstuffed cushions.

The Bright Elf's eyes were alight with a terrible mischief, as he too rose. "But I'm NOT gunna tell ya the *STORY!*" He singsonged, dancing away and diving out through her wall trailing teasing laughter behind.

For a moment it was all Edema could do not to drop into a facefault, proving she'd spent *entirely* too much time watching Grey muck about in those anime timelines. Not only were those walls *supposed* to be proof against teleportation and phasing magic, but a terrible flaw of Edema's had been her own curiosity. The same curiosity that had caused her to question the rule of the Spider Goddess and wonder if there was a better way.

Then the drow archmage began to muster all of her spell resources to follow him.

The Chase began.

---------------

The Wizard checked, and the little girl was *not* where she was supposed to be. After having been buried alive in the rubble of her home for over a day, the little girl would have proven pliant, the Wizard could have awakened the demonic Mistress 9, and then a quick show of power to further cow the "Witches" and make sure they wouldn't go doing anything behind his back.

Yet clearly they had already done so. Or at least one had. There was no way the anemic little Goth girl named Hotaru Tomoe could have escaped on her own.

Oh, to be sure, he could crack their minds open like eggs and sift through the contents. And while that had a certain appeal, it wouldn't leave much of his minions left.

No, he'd just settle for scanning surface thoughts for now. Several of them had proven to be fairly clever once you got them motivated. Then he'd make an example of the betrayer.

Now where could the girl have gone?

-----------

Ami felt a lot better for having had a quick swim. Much more settled. Now she could begin her homework, some additional studying, and then have a talk with Shard-san. Clearly he needed to rest more.

"I'm home!" declared Ami, placing her outer shoes in the proper space and getting her house slippers. Then noticing that there was Shard-san's shoes and someone else's shoes?! A battered pair of girl's shoes?

"We-we-welcome home-a," came the correct reply, if it sounded like Shard-san was having trouble sounding the phrase out.

Ami puzzled briefly then sniffed. Food?! It smelled like apples and baking bread?

"Ami-chan," came Grey's voice from the kitchen, "you dinner for ready is. Uhm. Oh heck."

Ami resolved again to teach sentence structure to the boy.

"Uhm. Mamoru and Usagi be later here." Grey stepped out of the kitchen area carrying a large pot. "We talk later. Many things need go over."

Ami's jaw clenched. Seeing her fiance in *her* frilly apron, wearing *her* oven mitts, having cooked? She would *not* break out in a giggle fit. No, it would not be proper to laugh at her fiance. Definitely not.

She just hoped whatever he made could be thrown out quietly. A boy in the kitchen? Surely a recipe for disaster.

"Ah, excuse me please."

An unfamiliar voice brought Ami's attention from the ridiculous sight (she was betting that cheeseburgers or something similarly American fastfood would be the pot's contents) to a little girl in black clothes. "Eh?"

"Pardon me, my name is Hotaru Tomoe, I am pleased to meet you."

---------

In the 1960s, Tiger Tanaka had been fit and powerful, head of a more secretive branch than Britain's spy agency, though fulfilling the same basic functions. He'd met Mister James Bond, even had a degree of rapport with the fellow, but that had been long ago.

He'd been 35 then, though his workouts and health regimen left him looking a decade younger. A sniper bullet had shattered his hip bone on one side in 1977. Now, in 92, he was 61 years old. The grace of his ninja training had faded, his hair was silver, he had become heavier set. It was when you looked into his eyes (overlooking the designer glasses to prop up his fading eyesight) that you saw that he was still the dangerous wolf.

"So, this is one of the Sailor Senshi? Or their ally I should say." Tiger paused the display on the monitor.

"Yes, there is also an unidentified woman who qualifies as a Senshi, though she seems a bit more mature than the rest of the underclad lolitas." Ritsuko was an exemplary worker in many ways, but had a manner of speaking bluntly that would not have endeared her to most employers. She didn't care much for these girls being some odd combination of sentai team and magical girls, though her opinion would have been mollified somewhat if they wore more clothing. And didn't do some other things that struck the physician/scientist as damn silly.

Tiger nodded and a second monitor came to life, this one showing Sailor Pluto. "Yes, she *does* have nice legs."

Ritsuko grumbled.

"What of this girl?" Tiger clicked a button, changing the view of Sailor Pluto to another girl who was hiding behind a bench.

"Identified as Hotaru Tomoe. Her home was destroyed in a mysterious explosion yesterday. Police have ruled that it was a propane tank valve malfunction, setting off several others stored nearby. They're full of it, as usual. No sign of the girl's father. They had a live-in maid, though there are indications she's more of her father's 'Girl Friday', but she was apparently away at the time at Mugen High."

Starting the tape moving again, Tiger studied it briefly. "I see. Tsk. Boy has to learn to change his walk when he's in civilian identity."

Ritsuko frowned. "Do you want them brought in?" She didn't specify whether it would be for questioning or removal or both.

"No. Not yet. Any data on the boy's civilian identity?"

"Grey Shard, grandson of Sebastian Shard." Ritsuko smiled at the sight of the great Tiger Tanaka nearly falling out of his chair.

"THAT is Sebastian Shard's grandson?" Tiger peered at the screen more closely. "If he grows up into half the man his grandfather was, he's going to make for interesting times here in Japan. So he's engaged to the 'exam ace' Ami Mizuno?"

"And one of her friends, a Miss Minako Aino, among others. Sebastian *was* quite the dashing, helpful, heroic sort during the Reconstruction."

"Add two names to the queue. It will allow us to place operatives near to them. That way we can aid them when it benefits Japanese interests, and if they have an agenda beyond that we can better learn of it."

"Which ones?" Ritsuko immediately started thinking of the various girls associated with their network who might qualify for this sort of duty. Perhaps that kunoichi/devil hunter Taki or even Kasumi or her rival Ayane. Let them get that rivalry out of their system. Hmmm. Maybe Xianghua? The paperwork would be easier than trying to mesh personalities.

"Honey and Nuku."

Ritsuko grimaced. "While Nuku is of the correct age, neither she nor Honey are particularly suitable as agents. Neither are what I would call ideal for deep cover. Honey in particular has no reason to go along with a deception."

Tiger halted her with a raised hand. "Their talents are of use here. We can present it to Nuku as an inherited family obligation from her creator. As for Honey, while she has no particular loyalty to us, despite our rebuilding of her, we can count on her to do the right thing as far as the people of Japan are concerned. Their talents would be most useful as well."

"But..." Ritsuko winced at the idea of Honey and Nuku wearing short skirted seifuku.

"And you'll be their contact. You need more experience in such things. Set yourself up in that Juuban hospital Mizuno's mother works at."

"But..." Ritsuko said, seeing her "zone of comfort" retreating out of reach for an undetermined length of time.

Tiger nodded and waved off the underling's comments. "Take Ibuki with you, if you must. Also Katsuragi. Experience in deep cover operations is necessary, Akagi-san."

"But..."

"That will be all, Akagi-san."

----------

Elsewhere:

"Help! Help!" It was clear to all who viewed him that the little elf boy (human equivalent of five) skipping along with the huge smile on his face wasn't serious. It was all that the boy could do not to bust a gut laughing.

"Git back heah, you!" The drow sorceress skimming along under a Cloak of Flying was another matter entirely. Though as she had left her sunglasses behind in her shop, she wasn't nearly as able to pursue as the boy was at evading.

"Ooooh! Da mean lady is gunna get me, Help!" The boy laughed, using his size to duck under the skirts of a minor goddess and through the door behind her into a building of sorts. The drow darted around the woman and flew in hot on his trail.

Edema's screams and then shocked laughter could be heard from within.

The goddess in front stepped away from the sign which read. "Womens' Heaven of Being Tickled Outrageously."

----------

Juuban:

Rei sat before the sacred fire, casually reached up and put out an ember that had landed in her hair, and decided that any further attempts to see this New Enemy were going to be hopelessly screwed up.

Whoever this Enemy was, they were completely unlike the previous ones. Whoever, whatever, this was, they'd detected her. They were also sick and twisted. She'd gotten a brief flash of some home that had been burned to the ground, then a wandering girl, then some guy in a bathrobe. At which point the guy in the bathrobe had looked up and SAW HER.

This was, the Shinto shrine maiden admitted, bad.

She'd waited a few minutes, tried again. And had gotten a porn movie involving girls in seifuku having their brains screwed out. Not only was this enemy able to tell she was trying to find them, he'd been able to deduce her identity, and block it.

What had *really* been concerning was that she knew darn well she'd never been in a movie like that. Except that each and every one of the "actresses" had looked darn familiar.

Rei thought that maybe she should try something else. Instead she focussed on Ami's fiance. After all, if he *did* go back to America, Ami would have to do so as well. He was a nice guy and all, but Ami was their friend and they didn't want to see her go.

Rei looked for the images again, and was relieved when this didn't involve close ups of thrusting body parts.

--------

The desert palace again. Once again Coral was with her. Once again she found herself experiencing thing from the point of view of the Mars Princess and just along for the ride. Or walk as seemed to be the current case.

"Knights, Coral?" Rei found herself saying. "Their power level is far lower than a Senshi. Why the Queen doesn't just empower more Senshi..."

"Well, you could bring up that idea at the Ball. Everyone's going to be there. Well, almost. I don't think Bennu will bother. Most likely Nebula. Maybe Flint will, or Obsidian. I doubt that Pluto or the other Outers will make an appearance. Certainly you can try to argue the point with Queen Serenity."

"Why don't you think she'll listen?" Mars asked, knowing darn well that Coral wouldn't have spoken that way if she didn't think that a certain princess would fail.

"The Knights are less powerful than Endymion's generals, it is true. Their main function is support, and they are assigned other tasks at need." Coral picked up a piece of stone and seemed to consider it as they continued to walk. "Each of the Knights can bolster a Senshi. There are nine Senshi, not counting those of the asteroids, and nine Knights. At least currently. Each of the Senshi embraces an elemental part of the universe."

"Yes, yes, I know this. I'm the Senshi of Fire after all." Mars grumped and snapped her fingers, causing a brief flash of flame.

"The Senshi represent physical aspects of the universe. The Knights are more mental or philosophically driven. Nebula, you've met him as Basalt, remember? Basalt was the name of the marine and minor noble. Nebula is also the name of the post: as a nebula is the creche for stars to form, so is the Nebula Knight the protector of the Royal Nursery. The other Knights likewise have their assigned duties, but when a Senshi and a Knight are together, the Senshi's attacks and recovery time are heightened despite the low relative power of the Knight."

"Still think more Senshi would be a better deal." Mars sighed as she walked alone into the center of a small raised platform. Privately she hoped that she *did* run into Nebula again. The fellow had proven absolutely correct. Mars had tried to summon Bennu for an audience, and had immediately found that one did *not* interrupt the Mage Of Deimos studies without good reason. He'd requested Obsidian come from the tower on Phobos in his place. "Another formal party with various courtiers doing their best to jockey for position. Well, at least all that sunspot activity has died down some and I'll get to see the other Senshi. I'll see you when I get back, Coral."

"Farewell, My Princess, and stay away from the firewine this time!" Coral laughed and waved goodbye.

-------

Rei gasped as she broke the image, putting things together. That girl Coral had been a bit of a manipulative gossiping schemer with a mercenary heart, but had also been one of Mars' best friends and a confidante. Someone who'd practiced archery with her for years and she'd grown up alongside.

And that had been the last time the Senshi of Fire and her best non-Senshi friend had seen each other. Mars had fallen before the Moon, and the Invincible Shadow had continued on without much of a pause. The Senshi of Mars had never seen it, but had known the exact moment of her friend's death - and the manner. Gasping for breath as the magic sustaining the environment had failed.

Rei shuddered and hugged herself, scooting back from the sacred fire as she did so. It had been one thing to hear of Beryl's madness and of the destruction of the Moon Kingdom, recited as some history story even if it was some holographic likeness of the ancient Queen Serenity that had been the teller of the tale.

To actually see with the ancient Princess' eyes the grand turrets and walls. To walk the ancient pathways and see the scurrying servants bowing before her. To hear the laughter and see the brightly smiling face of a good (if sometimes weird) friend. It brought it home in a way that a history lesson never could.

Rei Hino, despite the presence of the sacred fire, felt momentarily very cold and alone.

===============

There are a number of ideas that i wanted to explore in this fanfic.
As per a conversation with Jack Staik (of Another Approach amongst other entertaining reads) there were a number of things about the Sailor Moon series which neither of us enjoyed. ie: many of the sentai elements.
A Soldier's Duty is meant mainly as humor, and one of those topics of humor are those very sentai elements.
There have been many guesses about the Wizard's identity. A surprising number were correct. No, i'm not giving it away. Yet. It's not one of Grey's enemies (yet), but one of Jared's.
i've got enough written that i could go ahead and do another chapter, not even getting into the mess that Grey would encounter on attending his first day of classes at a Japanese school. Especially with his fractured Japanese and everyone else's fractured English.

some of the ideas i'm trying to throw out, and would like to see someone write: an arranged marriage for one of the Senshi? (i could see this as a Ranma alt/xover fic particularly, with the Tendos never getting involved at all. Just make one of the fathers Genma's training buddy from that time with Happosai instead of Soun. Makoto would work really well with this, as would Ami.) What about a competent villain? Or where the authorities or other people around didn't essentially ignore all this? (admittedly it's a Japanese thing to ignore a problem, part of their stoic cultural mindset) What if someone *could* remember a lot of details about the Silver Millenium?

Admittedly, there are a *lot* of Sailor Moon fanfictions i haven't read, and a fair number that i stopped reading in the first few paragraphs due to glaring problems with grammar, punctuation, or format. It may be that there are some of these very concepts played around with out there. Or is this another series where people tend to "think inside the box"?