Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ When You Told Me You Loved Me ❯ One-Shot

When You Told Me You Loved Me

By Silent Serenade

raining_rhapsody@hotmail.com

Written on 6/09/01 - 12/11/01

Posted at MediaMiner on 19/10/02

This is my third song fic, and I must say that, well, this was better than the last. Seeing that I put a lot into it, during different emotional stages through a long time (2 months), I've gotta say it is pretty good. Aw, come on, allow myself to somewhat raise my self-esteem. Many thanks to Leenie who edited this for me (taking more than a month), and hopefully you'll love it as much as I did when I re-read it. There's a scene which isn't accurate in the forms of the actual episode, but this is a fan fic... And lastly, I've broken the song lyrics up into very small particles, and you *must* read them to understand the story. The lyrics are crucial. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: 'When You Told Me You Loved Me' belongs to Jessica Simpson, and characters of Sailor Moon are obviously not mine. This plot, however, is totally MINE, and I shall have a right to sue you if you steal... *coughs* I mean, don't sue me...

~~~~~~~~~~

'In God I have put my trust; I will not be afraid.' - Psalm 56:11

~~~~~~~~~~

It was a stormy day. The wind was howling uncontrollably, violently thrashing the trees around in all possible directions. Lightning was constantly emitting blinding flashes, which were quickly followed by tremendous cracks of thunder. The sky was swirling with every shade of blue, from the rich, almost-black navy, to tones of blue and white clouds, entwined within another. A spark of light appeared from nowhere, and another holler of thunder could be heard distinctively. Yet not a single drop of rain would fall from the heavens. Just like the fourteen year-old blonde, silently watching everything from her open window, not taking her eyes off the sight, as if she was carefully studying the details before her, marveling the absolute beauty of nature's violence.

'I hate thunder,' she whispered to herself. 'I hate lightning. I hate storms.'

As on impulse, all movement stopped momentarily when she spoke, and the tiny murmur rang like a bell in an eternity of peacefulness, words echoing deep into the caves of utter darkness. Miraculously as it happened, all chaos resumed to their normal volume, if not louder.

The girl sighed softly and glanced over to her table, where a sealed letter with the word 'Serena' was printed on delicately in neat handwriting. She looked at it longingly, wanting to discover the secrets within, but after awhile of hesitation, resumed gazing outside.

She sat there quietly for some time, face stone cold and plain, body stiffly rigid. Her eyes, however, were clouded with the deepest emotions. The baby blue orbs which were once filled with joy and undying love, were now hiding endless tears, sorrow, and yet again, love. But this love wasn't bright and sunny; it was the stinky, cold, locked chambers of a dungeon. What has happened before is now nothing.

Once

Doesn't mean anything to me

Although the depressed teenager girl was going through the toughest stage she had ever experienced, she was quite a sight of true beauty. Sensitive chin rested in small, gentle hands, long, slender legs crossing eachother and barely covered by an undersized light pink skirt, with a short sleeved matching lavender top to complete the simple yet stunning outfit. A pair of fluffy pink bunny slippers, which she would occasionally kick off in frustration, covered her bare feet. Her long golden hair, which was usually tied in two 'Meatball Heads,' now hung like an endless waterfall. An occasional strand would fly from the effect of the wind, yet the direction of the gust made no reason for her to close the window. Delicate lashes framed her cerulean eyes, while her nose was slightly pointed, soft pink lips a bit dry, hiding sweetness and innocence. Her eyebrows were knitted together with concentration, eyes staring blindly outside.

'Darien,' she whispered affectionately. She closed her eyes, and slowly drew in a breath. Her face showed a deeply pained expression as she felt the familiar warmth in her eyes.

'No,' she tried to be strong, forbidding herself to succumb to any emotions. She swallowed a sob, and rapidly opened her eyes, covering all her feelings again. A sad smile formed on her gentle lips as she thought of Darien, and how he was the master of coldness. Well, before he admitted to his love towards her. And when he poured his heart to her, their souls were finally joined for eternity - or so she thought. And now, deep within the sacred part of her, half her soul was missing.

Come

Show me the meaning of complete

Serena recalled the last couple for weeks when Darien starting ignoring her. He would stop giving her warm glances, barely spoke to her and avoiding all contact with her. He began to seem distant when they were together, like something was always on his mind, constantly bothering him. After awhile, he started canceling dates, sometimes without even bothering to make up excuses. And then, the last time they spoke... Serena bit her lip as their last conversation replayed itself yet again.

~~~~~~~~~~

No matter how fast she ran after him, he was disappearing from her. She knew that if she let him fade away once again, she'd never be able to have the chance to discover the truth.

'Darien!' Serena called desperately yet out of breath from her chase. She saw him halt abruptly before breaking into a run towards the opposite direction.

'No!' She screamed, and pursued the chase. 'Stop! No, Darie-'

He turned his head to her, just as Serena lost her balance and begun to fall headfirst onto the hard concrete. In slow motion, Serena gasped and started towards the ground. Instinct took over as Darien sprinted to catch the helpless girl. Despite their distance, he quickly reached Serena just as her sudden weight caught him off guard, and he fell with Serena in his arms. He winced as his back came in hard contact with the pavement, yet holding Serena protectively, making sure she wouldn't get hurt. After the shock of pain finally passed, his body stiffened, feeling the comfortable warmth on top of him, and he slowly relaxed, drowning in Serena's baby blue orbs. Darien's eyes softened as he saw the pain and confusion in her expression turning to love and hope.

For awhile, Serena gazed into Darien as he removed his mask, resuming to the man she knew and loved. She leaned down, lips full of anticipation, yet never leaving his eyes. When their lips brushed, Serena felt the usual tingle of excitement and jolt of electricity pass through them, then finally closed her eyes. Unconsciously, Darien wrapped one arm around Serena's petite waist while he found his other hand on her hair, securely locking her in his grasp. Serena melted in his embrace and left one hand on his chest, the other affectionately stroking his firm yet soft face.

Darien deepened their kiss, tongue yearning for hers. Yet before the intimate touch had a chance to take place, Darien abruptly rolled over Serena and got up in one swift movement, back facing her. Confused and deeply hurt, Serena clumsily got up and stumbled, heading down again. She quickly grabbed onto Darien's shoulder, steadied herself and let go just as rapidly. She forced her thumping heart to quiet down and calmed her jittery nerves before swallowing and starting to speak.

'That-'

'That, was the worst mistake I've ever made.' Darien's unbelievably sharp, cold voice effectively cut her off. Her eyes widened in astonishment as he faced her, ice picks stabbing her heart. Seeing that Serena had his full attention, he continued throwing daggers at her.

'You know what Serena?' His tone was clear and firm. Knowing she wouldn't answer, he didn't pause for long.

'We're finished. Goodbye.' He started walking towards his apartment and away from Serena. His strides were swift and defined as he left her.

'Why?' Serena had finally found her voice since she was abruptly interrupted. Although she was shaking uncontrollably, her voice was somewhat loud and demanding.

Darien stopped and was silent for a few moments, considering his answer. Then without turning, he spoke with a tone of finality and harshly pulled the knives he earlier embedded in Serena's heart.

'I don't love you anymore.'

~~~~~~~~~~

Where

Did our love go wrong?

No matter how hard she bit, the pain wouldn't control her quivering lip. When she tasted blood, she stopped and closed her eyes yet again, this time focusing on a happy memory.

~~~~~~~~~~

The cheerful couple held hands and walked towards a bench in the empty park. This was their favourite place, under the huge oak tree, facing a pond and near the rose garden. Although the seats were empty that day, they decided to sit on the soft grass closer to the water where the sun was slowly sinking. As Serena sat cross-legged on the green, Darien walked towards the roses and tore off a crimson one. Quickly yet carefully, he broke off the larger thorns which could harm the one to hold the rose. Making sure there were none left, he walked and sat bedside Serena and gave her the special flower.

When she saw the symbol of what they shared, Serena gasped in delight and took it gently. She carefully studied its features; large red petals, hiding a yellow centre. The stem was long with quite a few leaves, and the freshly pruned thorns were easily defined from the rest of the green. There were plenty of thorns which weren't matured yet, and almost as soft as the petals. It was undoubtedly a hybrid tea.

Carefully, Serena felt one of the silky petals, perfectly formed and shaped. She then took a whiff of the wonderful scent and looked at Darien.

The smile she gave him was absolutely priceless. When the angel was happy, a golden aura would surround her. Her shiny lips, complimented by the delicious fruit lip gloss she had earlier applied, formed a vibrant smile and her eyes sparkled with joy.

Realising it was dark, Serena stood up and walked closer to the pond, eyeing the full moon that night. Darien followed suit and noticed how the moonlight shone on his angel, making her gleam with beauty, turning her golden hair to an almost silver radiance.

Serena was gazing at the moon's reflection in the calm water as Darien inched closer to her, purposely touching her hand which held his gift. She faced him as their eyes locked. No words needed to be exchanged as their eyes expressed their deepest love for eachother.

Darien's head leaned down as a few stands of ebony fell over his ocean eyes, sending Serena's heart pounding furiously. Drawing close the small distance between them, the lovers locked lips under the luminescent moon.

~~~~~~~~~~

Once

We were so strong

A sad smile was on Serena's lips as she opened her eyes. Those days were wonderful for her, when she had all she needed, which wasn't much. But now that the only worthwhile thing she had ever possessed has been torn harshly away from her. He was gone. Never to comfort again, never to kiss her, love her, ever again.

'The letter,' Serena spoke to no one in particular. Outside, lightning blazed and thunder smashed, as if related to the words. Her eyes darted to her desk and she panicked at what she saw. It was gone!

Serena stood up from her chair by the window with such force that it was knocked over, the sound perfectly fitting with the storm outside. Serena paced around her room, searching for the precious item, when she spotted it on the floor near where she was standing.

She hurriedly bent down to pick it up and clutched it tightly to her heart, her life depending on the words Darien had written to her.

'Idiot,' she harshly scolded herself. 'It was just blown to the floor, no need to make a huge fuss over it.'

Her words were so empty and shallow. She knew it, yet she was still trying so hard to hide it. To hide the harsh truth of reality. Because she just could not accept it.

How can I go on?

She fell on her knees, facing the now darkened sky and looked outside the window, where the storm was still roaring. She got up from her kneeling position and lifted the fallen chair up, other hand still securely holding onto the letter. She carried her chair to its place near her table and quietly sat on it. Once again, she resumed to gazing outside.

'At least you're not out there, trapped in the storm.' The somewhat simple statement made her think deeply about her current situation.

Although she wasn't outside in Mother Nature's rage, inside she was helplessly trapped. All of her emotions were mixed, and she had no idea what to do. She was so scared, yet hopeful at the same time. Many feelings, sorrow, love, pain, desperation, faith. Mourning her loss, strong love towards Darien, unbearable pain by being rejected, desperate for him, and faith in Darien. For what? For believing and trusting him to always love her, always have her as the one.

So much has changed in her life since he stepped into it, and now that he's left...

Lightning zapped outside, and an object on her desk in the spotlight caught her sight. With eyes shimmering with unshed tears she studied the locket.

When you told me you loved me did you know it would take me the rest of my life

To get over the feeling of knowing a dream didn't turn out right?

When you let me believe that you were incomplete without me by your side

How could I know

That you would go

That you would run?

Baby I thought you were the one

Her fingers slowly reached out hold the precious item, and stopped mid air just when she was about to touch it. Serena paused for a few seconds, time which seemed like eternity, before her trembling fingers made contact with her star locket. A sense of comforting warmth rushed through her as she did so, and she picked up the item. Her hand shaking with hidden emotions, she raised it closer to her face to inspect it. Slowing she passed it to her left hand, and with one finger traced the exquisite design, marveling the magic in such a simple and small object. For a while she concentrated on the delicately shaped star figure and the perfect moon situated right in the centre of it before giving it a special touch which set the soothing music free.

Unconsciously, Serena slowly released the breath she had held for so long, and she allowed the melody to reach into the deepest of her soul.

~~~~~~~~~~

'Serena,' he huskily whispered in her ear. His arms were wrapped around her stomach, and his chin went back to its place on her soft hair. Serena fell back in his arms and let one hand crawl to his, placing it gently on his right hand.

'Yes Darien?' There was no need to open her eyes and turn her head to capture his with her own, the motion was clearly expressed by the tone in her sweet gentle voice, each little detail vividly remembered.

Why

Can't I just leave it all behind?

The wind was blowing strongly at the headland as Darien was both protecting Serena from the harsh breeze, and just embracing her for the pure joy of it. Nobody said anything and let the wind do all the talking instead. Serena felt his warm left hand trace across her stomach, giving her a wonderful tingling sensation. He stopped at the left side of her waist, and began upwards, his warm palm making her shiver slightly. When a few fingers brushed her breast along the way, her eyes fluttered open and she let out a small gasp, almost losing her sanity. He paused for mere seconds when he felt a reaction from her, and secretly smiled to himself, before letting his hand trail to her back. Although it was slowly leaving her breast, Serena held her breath and replayed the moment in her mind, sending waves of desire burning through her.

Darien left his hand on her shoulder near her neck, before whispering in her ear again.

'Nothing,' he murmured, answering her earlier question. After reconsidering, he added, 'much.'

Serena opened her mouth to challenge him, but his warmth breath on her neck reminded her of his earlier actions, and she swallowed, closing her eyes at the same time. His mouth didn't leave her ears and instead proceeded to her neck and gently nibbled it.

Electricity zapped through her at his soft caress and she moaned, both not wanting him to stop and trying to prevent it from going beyond innocent touches.

Now's the time to start playing games, Darien mischievously thought. He deepened the kiss on her neck before suddenly withdrawing his mouth and arms, then stepped backwards.

Serena was entranced in a moment of pure bliss when he stopped and left her, his warmth turning to nothing but a cold wind. She almost fell back in surprised, but somehow she regained her position and forced herself to calm down. For a moment she considered having her back to him forever, never having to face him with her endless shame. But, what had she done wrong?

'You can do this, face him! I mean, he might've sensed a monster or something.' She persuaded herself until she gave up and reluctantly dragged her body before him.

She was again overwhelmed in joy when his warmth surrounded her once again, his lips capturing hers effectively. This time it wasn't a mere naïve exchange between students, it was a passionate soul bonding of the eternal couple.

Darien's mouth was clasped over Serena's, gently sucking on her slightly trembling lips. His right arms protectively held Serena's waist, pressing her closer to him, while his left hand cupped the base of her neck, both stroking her skin and hair.

Serena responded almost immediately to his caresses, her arms once slumped by her waist now finding its way to his chest and his thick, silky ebony hair. Her back was arched as Darien leaned over more, and her tongue entered his mouth.

Content with everything about her, Darien moaned noticeably in their embraced. The sound grumbled deeply in his throat as Darien's tongue made contact with hers. Burning desire scorched through them both at the intimate touch, and Serena was pushed back in her mouth with his tongue's constant prodding. This time his tongue entered her, making her cry out in pleasure. Even he couldn't resist emitting another uncontrollable groan, and he leaned over her more, wanting to get the most out of her.

At the same time, Serena was working magic with him by tenderly stroking his hair. She was now out of air, but she knew Darien could provide for her for another millennium if he'd wished.

Darien yet again deepened the kiss, pushing his tongue around in all directions, exploring her. They both cried out in delight as their tongues were entwined with one another once more.

I

Felt passion so bright that I was blind

~~~~~~~~~~

The memories of him had been haunting her everywhere since he started acting strangely cold towards Serena. Now she had only one thing which might bring them together once more; his letter. Yet would it be wise to read it? Maybe it would bring her to deeper pain and agony than ever. Then again, it could bring back her happiness, the joy of knowing his love for her.

Annoyed at her own paranoia, Serena rapidly shook her head, sending hair flying. Unnoticed to the young girl's senses, the music from the special locket was still playing, and she was still clutching it gently.

She had turned unbearably quiet since their last encounter, not paying any attention to school or friends. She was easily defeated by any monsters as Sailor Moon without the other Scout's help. Especially that dreadful dream monster.

Then

Something made me weak

~~~~~~~~~~

She was on an endless attempt to get him back. Running upon long hills, rowing on a lone boat in an empty ocean, all trying to reach him.

'Darien!' she screamed as his face moved even further away from her. 'Wait! Please!'

Yet no matter how fast she was, how much she strove towards him, how desperately she cried, he kept on disappearing from her.

She had to admit she was tiring quickly and had nearly run out of energy from her exhausting journey.

'No,' she breathlessly whispered, 'you've gotta keep it up. You need an explanation from him.'

~~~~~~~~~~

'Wake up, Sailor Moon!' The tough Sailor Jupiter called. 'Please, wake up!'

It was complete chaos. A dream monster had just attacked Sailor Moon and her life energy source was rapidly decreasing to a dangerously low amount.

Sailor Mercury was briskly typing on her mini computer, desperately trying to find a way to stop her friend and leader from slowly dying.

Meanwhile, Sailor Mars and Jupiter were trying to wake her up, as Sailor Venus was deep in thought about her friend's situation.

'You stupid Meatball Head!' Sailor Mars impatiently shook Sailor Moon's shoulders. 'Hurry up before you die! I mean, how the heck did you get attacked anyway, you careless idiot...'

Sailor Mars' voice slowly trailed off as tears rapidly slipped down her face, onto Serena's neck. Despite their constant fights, Sailor Moon and Mars were extremely close friends.

Serena stirred slightly in her bewitched sleep, and mumbled something incoherent. Sailor Jupiter noticed this and instantly hushed the other Scouts.

'Sh! She's saying something!'

All was quiet as Serena uttered she the sweetest word she could ever manage.

'Darien.'

Taking in my sleep

'I'm here, Serena.' Out of nowhere, Tuxedo Mask appeared on his motorcycle, with a worried Luna trailing behind.

He quickly got off his bike and rushed towards the sleeping princess, cape flailing. All four Sailor Scouts got out of his way and surrounded them as Tuxedo Mask dropped to his knees and delicately lifted Sailor Moon's head off the ground. He gently cradled her body with his own and held her to his chest.

Sailor Moon started talking again, and this time Tuxedo Mask was the only one who heard her soft loving cries.

'Darien...' Her voice trailed off in his shirt, as he held back tears threatening to spill. Barely controlling them, Tuxedo Mask spoke loudly, directed to the angel within his arms, heard by the 4 Inner Scouts and 2 cats, surrounding them in a protective manner.

'Serena, I love you.'

~~~~~~~~~~

She had finally reached him. Serena clung to him both in her dream and reality as her eyes slowly fluttered open and saw his emotional eyes searching her.

'Oh Darien, I knew you would come.'

Baby I'm in so deep and you know I believed

Serena had completely soaked his shirt, with mostly tears of happiness at her beloved's return. She felt his arms hold her tighter as his tears poured unnoticed into her soft golden hair.

For the first time in many weeks, she was living again. She felt many emotions, as well as the normal physical aspects. Yet most importantly, she felt him.

Suddenly, he pulled back. Serena, thinking he was shifting positions, ignored his movement and reacted by burying her face deeper into him. His body went rigid, and he stabled Serena into a sitting position before getting up from the ground and leaving her.

Both felt the loss, yet he ignored it and stood up straighter and turned away from the Serena to the astounded Sailor Scouts without a trace of tears left on his cheeks.

'Take care of her,' he spoke to them in a sturdy, emotionless tone, 'or danger awaits.'

'I can do that myself.' At the sound of her soft, sweet voice, Darien turned his head towards her. 'But first of all, tell me, why?'

Knowing fully what she meant, Darien gazed in her eyes, which widened in surprise at his glare. He swiftly drew a blood red rose from his tuxedo and held it slightly to her. Serena looked at the fully blooming beauty before her and longed to hold it, but she knew better not to.

'Our love is like a rose, beautiful when in bloom, but...'

Without warning, the perfect flower was crushed mercilessly in his fist. She drew in a soft breath and gasped when he looked at her again.

'It doesn't last forever.'

His voice faded and he released the flower from his grasp. Rose petals floated in the wind and slowly drifted to the ground where Serena was standing.

He chose that moment to whip his cape around and walked to his motorbike. With a loud explosion which pierced the silence and tension of the night with an arrow, he drove off, leaving a hurricane of dust and a confused teenage girl.

~~~~~~~~~~

When you told me you loved me did you know it would take me the rest of my life

To get over the feeling of knowing a dream didn't turn out right?

The melody from the elegant locket was abruptly cut off as Serena placed it gently on her desk. Those times she had with him, their fights, laughs and tears were nothing more but a lost dream, memories, which would last forever. Thinking that she could never love again, her tears once again threatened to spill.

'You will not breakdown,' she firmly instructed herself. 'You've promised to be strong, to keep on going in life. Isn't crying a weakness?'

Her own words stopped the tears as she once again concealed her emotions.

When you let me believe that you were incomplete without me by your side

How could I know

That you would go

That you would run?

Baby I thought you were the one

She reached for the photo of Darien and her as a couple and felt an overwhelming sense of emptiness rush through her. Serena place a finger near his face and stroked it, along with his frequently tousled hair. Seeing his lips, she silently yearned for his taste and the feel of gentleness.

Your lips

Your face

Something that time just can't erase

He had situated his arm around her shoulder, and they were both smiling at the photographer, posing for them in a natural way. It was as if that one photo captured their eternal love for eachother, and portrayed the deepest of their feelings.

Serena couldn't take it any longer. She just had to read his letter.

Slowly, she picked the thin envelope from the table and carefully turned it over. Written clearly, was the word: 'Darien'. There was nothing else on it, no usual pictures of bunnies, moons or love hearts, no 'X's' and 'O's'. It wasn't even sealed, just neatly tucked in.

Serena had an uneasy feeling about it, as her hopes were abruptly sliced. Tucking a finger under the side of the flap, she opened it.

My heart

Could break

All over again

She took out the piece of paper and unfolded it. The letter had pictures of red roses surrounding it.

Her heart pounding fiercely, she swallowed, took a deep breath, and started reading his words.

'Dear Serena,

This letter would clear many things about our relationship.'

She paused, started breathing and once again continued with the letter, this time without stopping.

'I once loved you. You are so precious, Serena. But now, so much has changed. Tuxedo Mask would always be there for Sailor Moon, as Princess Endymion would be for Serenity. But Darien Shields has his own life, which does not revolve around a certain Meatball Head.

I want to break up, I need to do so. It's nothing about you, Serena, it's me. My feelings towards you have changed. They don't exist anymore, and they'll never return. We shouldn't cling onto eachother because of our past and present duties. Saving Tokyo from evil does not bring us together. It never will.

Stop holding onto something which doesn't exist, Serena. We all have to move on with our lives, and you should just step into reality.

The truth is simple. You can never change it; only accept it.

Darien'

When you told me you loved me did you know it would take me the rest of my life

The truth is simple.

To get over the feeling of knowing a dream didn't turn out right

You can never change it.

Only accept it.

Could she?

When you let me believe that you were incomplete without me by your side

The letter dropped from Serena's hand and was picked up by the wind, taking it out the open window.

Serena sat in shock when she saw the letter floating outside, and ran out of her room, down the stairs and into the raging storm.

His words finally sank into her mind as Serena's emotions were brought to a peak, beyond her control.

Tears mercilessly poured down her face as the rain finally started. Serena fell to the ground and let more of her tears drip into her clothes.

The rain around her was beating down on her, and she was instantly soaked.

In a swift movement, Serena tossed her head up and allowed her round wet face be plummeted with more, the rain covering any traces of tears.

How could I know

After weeks of hidden trauma, unshed tears, unspoken emotion and denying the truth, she couldn't hold it any longer.

Her heart-wrenching cry was distinctively heard above all the chaos of the storm.

That you would go

The sob signified so much, showed her ultimate release of depression.

That you would run

It revealed how she had finally accepted.

Unnoticed, his letter slowly drifted to the ground with the wet, smearing ink of his words completely drenched.

Baby I thought you were...

And still being plundered by the tears of heaven.

The one

~~~~~~~~~~

The End

~~~~~~~~~~

Let's hope you're staring at your computer screen, still entranced in the story... Fine... Maybe not... Hey, make me feel better, alright? =) Now here are my thank you notes...

Leenie! Not only did you edit this, doing a great job, but now you have to put up with my singing of that song all the time... And it's high... *sighs*

I would like to thank the two 10 hour plane trips to China, in which I wrote plenty... Ok, I didn't, but it gave me somewhat of 'inspiration'.

Most importantly, I'd like to thank God for leading my way and blessing me with such precious talent... Not talent, but the will to write; the potential. Thank You.

And yes, you lovely reader, who's (hopefully) still mesmerised by what I've written... And if you are, then please review. And just in case you'd like to know, I'm attempting to work on a sequel. Oh, and download the song! It's by Jessica Simpson. =)

Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed!

Silently,

Serenade