Samurai Deeper Kyo Fan Fiction ❯ Running Up That Hill ❯ Chapter 1

 

 

 

It doesn't hurt me.

You wanna feel how it feels?

You wanna know, know that it doesn't hurt me?

You wanna hear about the deal I'm making?

You, be running up that hill-

You and me, be running up that hill.

 

Kyo slowly pulled himself away from his hovel where he had sat for the past two hours, back pushed up into the sharp angle of the room's corner. Being unable to sleep was not an amazing occurrence -he found himself sleepless nearly every time the sun sank. Once the evening meal was cleared away and the women headed toward the hot springs, he was left alone, unwanted, staring at a blank wall.

 

Not that he particularly blamed them. He had been rather unapproachable lately. But could they hold that against him? Had he ever been particularly open with them? Of course not. Maybe they only thought of him as the guide; the person who was there, listened to their words, but otherwise not giving a damn.

 

And in a way, he didn't give a damn. In a way, he honestly couldn't care less as to what happened…

 

He stumbled out into the fresh, slightly chilly air of late summer, feeling his heat-flushed face burn at the icy breath of wind. He practically collapsed onto the porch-deck that surrounded the pagoda inn, eyes closing, face lifting the breeze. He couldn't stand the tightness of his room anymore. He couldn't sit in the stifling heat while the others slept fitfully, immersed in their innocence.

 

They were all innocent. Even Yukimura and Benitora, who had killed countless men in battle. Even Sasuke, who had to fight for his life ever since he was given the horrible curse of being born in the Sea of Trees.

 

Kyo's chest had taken up a gentle throbbing -it was hardly the horrible, full-blown pain that it had been earlier. His training with Muramasa, only three days prior, had taken a toll on him. It had been a toll that Kyo didn't let the others know about. He would not appear weak, not after collapsing and sleeping for an entire day after the training. Not after hearing what Muramasa had made the child, Shiina Yuya, promise him.

 

Stay by Kyo's side.

 

Kyo shook his head, sagging against one of the pillars that supported the porch. That child, the girl of sixteen years*, could never stay by his side. Her life had hardly begun… ((A/N: * In the manga, it is said that Yuya is sixteen))

 

“K-Kyo?”

 

Speak of the devil. Even though Kyo had his eyes closed, he could see her in his mind's eye. There she was, standing by the porch, wringing her hands nervously and gazing at him apprehensively. She was unsure if he was awake or asleep, if he would pull a blade on her like he did the last time she approached him.

 

That had all been her fault, to his defense. She had snuck up on him. He hadn't been expecting her to come to him so soon. He had been weakened and in pain, hoping that she would see that and back off. But no, she harped, as usual. She was a nuisance… damn woman.

 

“Kyo?”

 

Kyo didn't even grace her with an answer. His eyes opened, red orbs glowing in the darkness. They focused, slowly, on Yuya, staring blankly.

 

Yuya wilted under his gaze. He knew the affect he had on her. She was strong willed, yes, but not around him. She was trying so hard to be his sheath, to be his bit of humanity… It made Kyo begin to wonder if he should simply take her; here, tonight, and be done with all of this pretending. He was so sick of pretending…

 

“Kyo… I, um, I came out to see if you were okay,” she was murmuring, flustered. Her blue-green eyes shifted everywhere but Kyo. The silence stretched on and Yuya, uncomfortable, began to babble. “I mean, I know that you must still be hurt. After Muramasa's training, you must be-”

 

“Shut up,” Kyo said. The words were emotionless, stark.

 

 

And if I only could,

Make a deal with God,

And get him to swap our places…

Be running up that road,

Be running up that hill,

Be running up that building.

If I only could, oh...

 

The hurt in Yuya's eyes was so obvious that Kyo suddenly felt something clench within him. He brushed it aside, guessing it was yet another pain from his training.

 

“Why are you so cruel?!” Yuya yelled, voice horribly loud in the chilly night air.

 

“Shut up,” Kyo hissed, getting to his feet. Almost everything in his body was sore and ached at the slightest movement. Kyo stifled a moan of pain and grabbed Yuya's elbow, yanking her with him as he moved off toward the hill behind the Inn.

 

“What are you doi-”

 

Yuya's screech was cut off by a venomous glare from Kyo.

 

“How many times do I have to tell you to be quiet? You'll end up waking the Inn keeper and get us all thrown out.”

 

Yuya quieted, but she still looked unhappy. She jerked her arm out of Kyo's hand, but continued to walk with him. “Where are we going?” she asked, voice softer.

 

“What will you do when I get my body back?” Kyo asked finally, turning crimson eyes onto Yuya as they walked.

 

Yuya seemed taken aback by the question. “Well, I…” she had never actually thought about it. She had promised Muramasa that she would stay with Kyo… but she doubted he would want that. And she doubted she could put up with his abuse for the rest of her life. It just may result in her early suicide. Or his murder, one or the other.

 

“Will you try to kill Kyoshiro?”

 

“What?” Yuya asked sharply, stopping. They were far enough away from the Inn, and damnit, Yuya wanted answers, not distance.

 

“He did kill your brother, didn't he?” Kyo sneered. “And you did say you would avenge your brother, didn't you?” He laughed, cruel and calculating, and Yuya shivered.

 

“I wish,” Yuya began softly, looking at the ground. “I wish you and I could switch places, Kyo,” she murmured. That seemed to get his attention. “Either that, or I wish you would listen to me seriously for once… then maybe I could teach you something about forgiveness.”

 

Yuya turned away from Kyo, feeling tears well up in her eyes and threaten to spill over. She began to run, vision blurry, back to the Inn. She had to get away from him. She had to get to her room, crawl into her pallet, and sleep.

 

You don't want to hurt me,

But see how deep the bullet lies.

Unaware that I'm tearing you asunder.

There is thunder in our hearts, baby.

So much hate for the ones we love-

Tell me: we both matter, don't we?

 

Kyo would have normally let her walk away, uncaring, but tonight… tonight that was unappealing. What was appealing was what she had said. What she felt. The voice she had used. Kyo had never heard it before -never used with him, at least.

 

He went after her, feeling all of his muscles scream in protest as his gait quickened. He caught up to her swiftly -there was only so much speed a woman in a small, tight yukata could muster. Once again, he grabbed her elbow, turning her around. “Why did you say that?” he demanded.

 

Yuya looked to the side, trying to mask her pain with anger. She would not submit to him anymore. She was sick of being used. She was sick of giving up her heart to him, each time offering it and each time he rejected.

 

“Damnit, woman, answer me,” he said, shaking her elbow to add emphasis.

 

“I hate you,” Yuya muttered, voice hard and cold, but a tremor laced through it. “I hate you. You're so malicious -to everyone. Everyone loves you so much -they respect you. And you treat them all like shit. I'm sick of it, Kyo. I am sick of giving everything up to you and having it all shoved back in my face.”

 

Kyo watched Yuya as she spitefully spit out her feelings, unknowingly laying her heart on the line once again. Didn't she know? Didn't she know that Kyo was unable to feel emotions of love? It wasn't possible for him… and if love caused people to break down the way Yuya was at that moment, Kyo wasn't sure if he'd ever want the ability.

 

At that moment, the pain in his chest became quite uncomfortable, growing with every second he stared down at Yuya. She was struggling not to cry. She was trying to stay mad at him.

 

 

And if I only could,

Make a deal with God,

And get him to swap our places,

Be running up that road,

Be running up that hill,

Be running up that building,

If I only could, oh...

With no problems.

 

“Come with me.”

 

Yuya refused to look at him, although his request -albeit, it was worded more like a command- surprised her. “No,” she said stiffly. “Did you not hear a word I'd just said? I don't want to-”

 

“Woman, I am going out on a limb for you, here,” he said, sounding fairly exasperated. His hand tightened, causing Yuya to flinch. “Come on.”

 

He began walking and Yuya was forced to stumble after him. His grip was tight on her arm and he was literally dragging her by it. She finally decided that complaining may be very childish, yes, but it was probably the only way to keep her arm from coming off at the socket. “Kyo, you're hurting me!”

 

Kyo released her quickly, as if her words stung, making Yuya stumble. His back faced her, but his gait had stopped completely, leaving him immobile and as still as a statue. Yuya looked up at him in confusion while rubbing her arm, trying to get the blood circulating again.

 

“Kyo, what-”

 

Kyo turned on her, his cold gaze enough to make her voice halt in mid-word. She gazed up at him with something akin to fear -would he kill her? Surely not -after being with her for so long, he must want her around for some reason. Or maybe it was pointless to waste the energy it would take to kill her.

 

“Come here.”

 

Yuya froze at those words. His hands were at his sides, nowhere near his katana that was tucked into his obi. But still, Yuya worried. He was staring at her expectantly. She shouldn't keep him waiting… but her feet refused to move.

 

“Come.”

 

Yuya found her footing, pushed her left foot forward, followed by her right-

 

Kyo grabbed her chin in his hand, pulling her the last few inches toward him. Before Yuya could let out the scream she had been holding in, his lips were against hers.

 

C'mon, baby, c'mon, darling,

Let me steal this moment from you now.

C'mon, angel, c'mon, darling,

Let's exchange the experience, oh...

 

Yuya's scream died on her lips, but a million thoughts raced through her mind as she struggled to process what was happening. She tried to pull away from Kyo, but his arms had come to wrap around her waist, holding her possessively to him.

 

His lips were soft but pressed against Yuya as if he were trying to devour her. His tongue ran across her bottom lip and, without thinking, she opened to him, body going limp against his. She'd never felt this before -about anyone. Her brother had taught her to protect herself from men, from men just like Kyo, but right now…

 

She felt the tears that had threatened her earlier spill down her cheeks as her tongue caressed Kyo's. His hands, rough and calloused, were on her shoulders, going under the fabric of her thin summer yukata, and Yuya didn't want him to stop.

 

His lips pulled away from hers and left Yuya gasping for breath. Her head fell against his muscled chest, breathing in his musky scent of man and forest. One of his hands returned to her face, brushing her tears off of her cheek. “Do you still hate me?”

 

Yuya couldn't help but let out a soft chuckle, eyes closing. “Yes, Demon Eyes Kyo. I still hate you.”

 

If I only could, be running up that hill…