Sonic Series Fan Fiction ❯ Sonic Zeroes ❯ The Real Super Powers of Friendship ( Chapter 4 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: Sailor J 
The conclusion to the game! It doesn't really make much sense, does it? Hope you enjoyed reading this~
Non Anime: Sonic Series Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 08.12.2009 | Pages: 11 | Words: 3.6K | Visits: 259 | Status: Completed
The conclusion to the game! It doesn't really make much sense, does it? Hope you enjoyed reading this~
Non Anime: Sonic Series Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: Other | Uploaded On: 08.12.2009 | Pages: 11 | Words: 3.6K | Visits: 259 | Status: Completed
Author's Note: I bet you thought this chapter would never come. It usually takes me three years to finish a story, but since this is for my friend I decided to only take half a year. Aren't I sweet? I hope you enjoy the final chapter and I also hope that I win the lottery. It could happen! Not really. Before we start the show, let's have a moment with Sera!!
Sera: Hello my audience of five! I'm Sera and I'm adorable. *pose*
Sonic: And people say I'm conceited.
Sera: I'm here with my hero, Sonic. Say hi to the people!
Sonic: Hi to the people!
*Bad joke #17*
Sera: You sure have changed since the last time I saw you. Which was over ten years ago. Why the need for a make-over?
Sonic: I know they say not to mess with perfection, but....
Sera: Yeah?
Sonic: ....I got nothing.
Sera: *falls back anime style* I think what the audience really wants to know when you'll ask me to be your wife. WHEN?!
Sonic: *looks down at his invisible watch* What? Is it...that time of the day already? I gotta go. Fast.
Tails: Gotta go faster, faster! Sonic X!! *pose*
Sera: Oh no you don't!!
Amy: Oh yes he does! Isn't it time for you to go back to the closet?
*The closet of forgotten Sonic characters appears behind Sera*
Sera: No!!! I'm not ready to go back! I like breathing fresh air! I can't go back!! People keep spelling my name wrong! It's Sara!! AAAAAHH!!!!
*Sera gets sucked into the closet. What a way to go*
Sonic: Good timing, Amy.
Amy: It was my pleasure. Now I can have you all to myself~!
Sonic: ......*runs away*
Amy: You can't escape my love!!! *skips after him*
Tails: Gotta go faster, faster, faster, faster! Sonic X!
...okay!!! On with the fic!!
Sonic Zeroes
Chapter 4: The Real Superpower of Friendship
************************************************************ **************
*When we last left our losers, they decided to beat each other senseless. Why? Because they lack common sense. Anyways, they all somehow wounded up on different parts of Eggman's flagship, aka the final level*
Dr. Egg: Alright. This will be our final moment together. You boys have really grown on me.
Charmy: Really?
Dr. Egg: No, of course not! MWAHAHAHA!!!
Charmy: You're a jerk!
Dr. Egg: Flattery will get you nowhere. Now listen carefully. For no real reason in particular, Dr. Eggman has captured me and locked me into a cell on this flagship. I need you to find the five keys that will unlock this door. Think you can handle it?
Vector: Leave it to us, mysterious stranger. We'll have you out of there in no time or else we'll pay you!
Espio/Charmy: *tackle Vector* He didn't mean that!
Dr. Egg: Off you go then. Dr. Egg over and out! What a bunch of imbeciles.
Espio: We can still hear you.
Dr. Egg: Damn it!
*Let's see how Team Sonic is doing*
Sonic: This flagship is friggin huge!
Knuckles: It's kind of nerve-racking and intimidating. Maybe we should just go home...
Sonic: I'd expect that kind of cowardly talk from Tails!
Tails: Hey!!! I'm standing right here.
Sonic: And?
Tails: ;_;
Sonic: We gotta get to the flagship's core and blow it to pieces!
Knuckles: Oh, now all of a sudden we have a plan.
*Cut to: Team Buttercup!!*
Cream: *hyperventilating* Too scared to go on.
Amy: Get it together, Cream. You're embarrassing the rest of us.
Big: Froggy...
Amy: Come on, Cream. We gotta find Robotnik and pound his ass to the ground. *winks at the Sonic Rap*
Big: I will help my little friend! *uses his teeth to pick Cream up from the ground*
Cream: oo; Um...
Big: Woof woof!
Amy: ....whatever. I don't even care anymore.
*The team wanders off and reach an area with six cannons surrounding them*
Amy: Oh my gawd...
Big: I will protect us from the big light sockets.
*Big grabs Amy and Cream and stands in the center of the red target*
Amy: No, Big!! Move out of the--
*And the team is hit!*
Amy: x-x You guys..suck. *faints*
Big: Feels good...*faints as well*
*Cut to: Team Dork*
Rouge: That's Team Dark, you dumbass!!
*Stick and stones, red. Sticks and stones*
Shadow: Do any of you guys get an ominous feeling from this place?
Omega: The only feelings I have are feelings of hatred and teenage angst. Woe is me.
Rouge: You two have more in common than I realized.
Shadow: Oh shut up. *whispers* Woe is me.
Rouge: I heard that~!
Shadow: Damn it!
Rouge: I can't wait to pound Eggman's ass to the ground and steal his treasure! Let's hurry!
Shadow: Easier said than done. *points to all the ridiculous railings and crumbling platforms*
Rouge: Nothing we can't handle. We're the best team in this God-forsaken game.
*And so the team begins the level by jumping onto a high-suspension railing*
Omega: I was not made to grind on rails. *loses his balance and falls to his death* I regret nothing!
Rouge: Omega!! NOOOOO!!
Shadow: He's dead to us now. We have to keep going. It's what Omega would want.
Omega: *from a distance* I want you to save me.
Shadow: u-u It's what Omega would want.
Rouge: You're right.
*The duo lands on a platform*
Rouge: Which way do we go now?
Shadow: Hm. Let me stand here and ponder. Hey, does the platform seem to be shaking or am I having another seizure?
*The platform begins to crumble*
Rouge: Quick! Jump to the other platforms!
*As soon as Shadow jumps on the other platform, it explodes*
Shadow: I HATE THIS LEVEL!!! *falls to his doom*
Rouge: Curse you, Sonic Team!!!!! Why are you guys so obsessed with making the final level take place in the sky with a million rails and non-existent platforms? WHY?! *gets hit by a cannon* Et tu, cannon? *falls to her death*
*Dramatic much? Let's check on Team Chaotix*
Charmy: I think we should spend our money on bubblegum and candy!
Vector: I already told ya, we're buying a iPod so I can have something to plug my headphones into.
Charmy: Bubblegum!!
Vector: iPod!!!
Espio: We won't get that money unless we finish this mission!
Charmy/Vector: Oh yeah. I forgot about that. Stop saying whatever I say! AARGH!!
Charmy: How are we suppose to find five small keys on such a huge ship?!
Espio: Wait a minute. I sense a key nearby, but where? Where?
*The team is standing on a crate that's holding the key*
Espio: It's so close I can almost taste it.
Charmy: Does it taste like bubblegum? I want some!
Vector: Be quiet and let him concentrate!! *chokes Charmy*
*2 hours later*
Espio: I can't put my finger on it, but that key is really close.
Vector: *sniffle* And I really wanted that iPod.
*Vector plops down on the crate and it breaks, thus revealing the key*
Charmy: We found it!!!
Vector: We're the best detective ever!
Espio: Naturally!
Charmy: Group hug!!!
*The ultimate group hug attack! Except it's not really an attack. I'm lonely*
Dr. Egg: You fools!!! You still have four more keys to find!!
Team Chaotix: D'oh!!
*Let's go back to Team Sonic*
Sonic: We made it to the ship's core so fast, but I'm not really surprised.
Tails: Just be glad the author was too lazy to write anymore scenes from this level. Anyways we have exactly 30 seconds to destroy this place before the ship wrecks havoc on the entire planet!
Sonic: I'm not about to let that happen! I love this planet. It has all my favorite shows.
Knuckles: It's pounding time!!
*Meanwhile at the top of the flagship*
Amy: We finally made it to...here.
Eggman: What? You're 20 minutes early. I haven't finished my Egg Emperor yet, so if you'll just---
Amy: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
*Amy tackles Eggman to the ground and hits him repeatedly with her Piko Piko Hammer*
Big: I'm scared of the pink lady.
Cream: *hugs Cheese* Me too.
Big: She reminds me of mommy. I'm a good boy!! *rolls himself into a ball and cries*
Cream: oo; .....*walks away slowly*
Rouge: Team Badass is in the house!! Huh? *sees Amy beating Eggman senseless* Looks like we're too late.
Omega: Murder Dr. Eggman!
*Omega rushes over and starts shooting Eggman in the face and Amy continues to pound his lower half*
Rouge/Shadow: ..........
Rouge: ^^; You guys seem to have everything under control, so I'm just gonna go....*flies off to Eggman's secret treasure...room*
Shadow: I'll just wait here I guess.
*Eggman finally melts into a pile of goo and Froggy and Chocola chao materialize from the goo*
Omega: Mission complete. The doctor has been terminated. *walks off to wherever Rouge went*
Big: FROGGY!!!!!!!!!!!
Froggy: o-o!!! *tries to hop away, but he is too slow*
Big: *hugs/suffocates Froggy* Froggy!! I missed you sooo much. I promise to never let you out of my eyes.
Froggy: -_-;;;
Chocola: ....
Cheese: >:D Chao chao chao! (Translation: You can't run away from me, bitch!)
*Cheese strangles Chocola*
Cream: Oh Cheese, I'm so happy for you~!
*And so everyone walks away from the pile of goo*
Goo: Chaos data has been copied. *disappears*
Vector: So it looks like that Eggman was a fake, which means....
*Team Chaotix unlocks the cell and....*
Vector: Just as I suspected. Our client was Dr. Eggman!!!
Eggman: How did you figure it out?!
Vector: u-u It's what makes us great detectives.
Charmy: I can't believe it!
Espio: Who would've thought Dr. Egg was actually Dr. Eggman. To think I was fooled so easily.
Charmy: But we still get paid, right?
Eggman: Sure I'll pay you. I'll pay you when I rule the world!! MWAHAHAHA!!!
Charmy: Aw man! We'll never get that money!
Vector: *cracks knuckles*
Knuckles: OOOOOOW!!!
Vector: ...it's not right to promise something you don't even have.
Eggman: I know! That's what makes me an evil genius.
Vector: Let's get him, boys.
Eggman: Wait! Wait! What are you doing?! This is a children's game! You can't get this violent! AAAHHH!!!
*Cut to: Eggman's secret treasure room thing*
Rouge: Finally, the moment I've been waiting for. The treasure is all---Shadow?!
*The entire room is filled with pods containing Shadow clones*
Rouge: What the hell?! THIS is Eggman's treasure?! No man should have this many copies of Shadow. It's just disturbing on so many levels. Ugh!
Omega: Must annihilate all Eggman robots.
Rouge: Do what you have to do.
Omega: You know, the original copy has to be out there somewhere. I cannot offer anymore comfort.
Rouge: Thanks Omega. Hey, I didn't notice this camera here! *stands in front of the camera and poses*
*Meanwhile outside...*
Sonic: Phew. That was close, but we managed to destroy the core of the ship and save the world. Or something like that.
Knuckles: Weren't you scared at all?
Sonic: Hell no!
Knuckles: ADMIT THAT YOU WERE SCARED!!!!
Sonic: Okay! I was scared a little bit. Are you happy now? Anyways, thanks for your help.
Knuckles: You just admitted you were..scared?! And you thanked me? *has a heart attack*
Sonic: Tails, you did a good job too.
Tails: ;-; Really?
Sonic: No.
Tails: *weeps forever*
Cream: Hey, isn't that Mr. Sonic over there?
Amy: SONIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sonic: Oh damn.
*Amy latches on to Sonic and attempts to kiss him*
Sonic: Get it off me!! Date rape!!
Everyone else: *corny laugh*
*Back to Team Chaotix*
Vector: Now that we got punching you out of our system, why don't you tell us who locked you in here for being a bad boy and trying to rule the world.
Eggman: x.x If you step outside, then all your answers will be revealed.
*Outside, Metal Sonic appears before Sonic and the others*
Amy: Who's that sexy robot?
Metal Sonic: All living things kneel down before your master!
Knuckles: My only master is the Master Emerald!!
*Everyone else stares at Knuckles*
Knuckles: What? What?
Metal Sonic: Chaos Crisis Power Make Up!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rouge: *gasp* That transformation is kinda hot.
Knuckles: I'll say.
Everyone else: ....
Knuckles: Stop doing that!!
Eggman: Uh oh. It looks like Metal has finally transformed. That's what I get for waking him up and giving him a voice box.
Sonic: That's Metal?!
Eggman: No, it's a monkey. Of course it's Metal!!!
Sonic: Heh. Looks like you're not the main villain AGAIN.
Eggman: Silence!!!!!!! Anyways, Metal has combined all of your data with the power of chaos. There's no way we can stop him. I suggested we inhabit another planet, like maybe Jupiter.
Vector: Nah. Jupiter is a horrible name.
*Team Sonic, Team Dark, and Team Rose pull out chaos emeralds. A total of seven to be exact*
Eggman: What?! How the hell did you get those?
The teams: *shrug* Don't ask questions.
Eggman: Well, you're still gonna lose.
Charmy: But you just said--
Eggman: YOU'RE GOING TO LOSE!!!
Sonic: Just leave it to me, fat ass.
Amy: Sonic, no! I can't let you risk your life and fight the bad guy. You've never done anything so reckless before in your life!
Sonic: Shut your face. I'm gonna drag Tails and Knuckles along.
KnuxTails: WHAT?!
Shadow: Okay, I'm going to volunteer everyone and we're all going to distract Metal long enough for you guys to use your super powers. Man, that sounds lame.
Sonic: Awesome. All this talk of team work makes me feel all warm inside.
Rouge: Oh no. I smell a long speech coming up.
Sonic: It's not often that people get together to stop a monster. Sure, we all fought each other for reasons I can't remember, but to be able to put all that aside is really---
Shadow: Chaos Blast!!
Sonic: OW!!! Okay, okay. I won't say anymore...except let's show that creep the true super power of TEAM WORK!!!
Everyone else: *groans*
SonTailsKnux: Chaos Crystal Power--
Amy: Enough!! That joke is so played out.
*So, Sonic transforms into Super Sonic and Knuckles and Tails are engulfed by a gold sphere. Whaaatever*
Knuckles: I wonder how the others are going to distract Metal.
Amy: Hey Metal! Look at us being all distracting!! Are you distracted yet?
*Metal Sonic fires a laser at Team Rose*
Team Rose: x-x
Tails: oo We better hurry.
Sonic: Okay, let's focus all our energy into one blast and hey, look at the clouds! Cool!
KnuxTails: Sonic!!
Sonic: ^^; Whoops.
Rouge: Oh Metal~! Look what I've got. *shows Metal a picture of some x-rated robots. Ew*
Metal Sonic: ...
Shadow: Where did you get those?
Omega: Certainly not from me. Why would you accuse me of such a thing?
Shadow: ...freak.
*Metal Sonic electrocutes the trio of darkness*
Vector: Things are not looking good, boys.
Espio: It was a pleasure working with you two.
Charmy: I used your toothbrush to unclog the toilet.
Espio: What?!
*Team Chaotix gets pwned by Metal Sonic*
Sonic: Okay, that's long enough. ULTRA SHINY BALL ATTACK!!!!
Metal Sonic: No! My one true weakness!!!
*Metal Sonic has totally just been defeated. He totally de-transforms and it's so pathetic. Don't give me that look*
Metal Sonic: Why? Why can't I defeat you?
Sonic: Because we're Sonic Heroes!!!
*Team Sonic does the lamest pose ever*
Sonic: I'm gonna let you run free and try to destroy the world. If you ever what a rematch though, just call me.
Omega: Metal Sonic cannot hear you for he is dead.
Sonic: Oh. That's cool too.
Amy: ^o^ Now we can get married, Sonic!!
Sonic: Uh oh. It's time I run away in a comical fashion! Later~!
Tails: Wait for me, Sonic! I like running away in a comical fashion too!
Knuckles: *chuckles* Man, that Sonic sure does have his hands full. I don't sound like a dork at all.
Rouge: Well I guess I'll go steal someone else's treasure. *glances at Knuckles*
Knuckles: ....?
Rouge: God, you're slow. *flies away*
Cream: Oh you guys! *laughs*
Big: Froggy and me go home now! Whee! *jumps off the airship...and falls to his death*
Vector: That's the end of this case and it's the end of us.
Charmy: What about my bubblegum?
Espio: That's right. We need to beat the money out of Eggman.
Eggman: Oh crap!! I hate that hedgehog!!! *wobbles away*
Knuckles: ....hey!!! Don't you dare steal my Master Emerald, bat-girl!!! *glides off*
Shadow: ...
Omega: *holds Metal Sonic*
Shadow: So, you want to join me in my quest to find out about my past?
Omega: Negative.
Shadow: Why not?
Omega: Something suddenly came up.
Shadow: ....are you going to hump that dead robot?
Omega: ....does not compute.
Shadow: You're a freak, Omega.
Yes he is. And this concludes our story. Did it make any sense at all? No!!! And that's why you shouldn't play Sonic Heroes. Save your precious time and pie. Anymoo, thanks for reading. Peace out!!
Sera: Hello my audience of five! I'm Sera and I'm adorable. *pose*
Sonic: And people say I'm conceited.
Sera: I'm here with my hero, Sonic. Say hi to the people!
Sonic: Hi to the people!
*Bad joke #17*
Sera: You sure have changed since the last time I saw you. Which was over ten years ago. Why the need for a make-over?
Sonic: I know they say not to mess with perfection, but....
Sera: Yeah?
Sonic: ....I got nothing.
Sera: *falls back anime style* I think what the audience really wants to know when you'll ask me to be your wife. WHEN?!
Sonic: *looks down at his invisible watch* What? Is it...that time of the day already? I gotta go. Fast.
Tails: Gotta go faster, faster! Sonic X!! *pose*
Sera: Oh no you don't!!
Amy: Oh yes he does! Isn't it time for you to go back to the closet?
*The closet of forgotten Sonic characters appears behind Sera*
Sera: No!!! I'm not ready to go back! I like breathing fresh air! I can't go back!! People keep spelling my name wrong! It's Sara!! AAAAAHH!!!!
*Sera gets sucked into the closet. What a way to go*
Sonic: Good timing, Amy.
Amy: It was my pleasure. Now I can have you all to myself~!
Sonic: ......*runs away*
Amy: You can't escape my love!!! *skips after him*
Tails: Gotta go faster, faster, faster, faster! Sonic X!
...okay!!! On with the fic!!
Sonic Zeroes
Chapter 4: The Real Superpower of Friendship
************************************************************ **************
*When we last left our losers, they decided to beat each other senseless. Why? Because they lack common sense. Anyways, they all somehow wounded up on different parts of Eggman's flagship, aka the final level*
Dr. Egg: Alright. This will be our final moment together. You boys have really grown on me.
Charmy: Really?
Dr. Egg: No, of course not! MWAHAHAHA!!!
Charmy: You're a jerk!
Dr. Egg: Flattery will get you nowhere. Now listen carefully. For no real reason in particular, Dr. Eggman has captured me and locked me into a cell on this flagship. I need you to find the five keys that will unlock this door. Think you can handle it?
Vector: Leave it to us, mysterious stranger. We'll have you out of there in no time or else we'll pay you!
Espio/Charmy: *tackle Vector* He didn't mean that!
Dr. Egg: Off you go then. Dr. Egg over and out! What a bunch of imbeciles.
Espio: We can still hear you.
Dr. Egg: Damn it!
*Let's see how Team Sonic is doing*
Sonic: This flagship is friggin huge!
Knuckles: It's kind of nerve-racking and intimidating. Maybe we should just go home...
Sonic: I'd expect that kind of cowardly talk from Tails!
Tails: Hey!!! I'm standing right here.
Sonic: And?
Tails: ;_;
Sonic: We gotta get to the flagship's core and blow it to pieces!
Knuckles: Oh, now all of a sudden we have a plan.
*Cut to: Team Buttercup!!*
Cream: *hyperventilating* Too scared to go on.
Amy: Get it together, Cream. You're embarrassing the rest of us.
Big: Froggy...
Amy: Come on, Cream. We gotta find Robotnik and pound his ass to the ground. *winks at the Sonic Rap*
Big: I will help my little friend! *uses his teeth to pick Cream up from the ground*
Cream: oo; Um...
Big: Woof woof!
Amy: ....whatever. I don't even care anymore.
*The team wanders off and reach an area with six cannons surrounding them*
Amy: Oh my gawd...
Big: I will protect us from the big light sockets.
*Big grabs Amy and Cream and stands in the center of the red target*
Amy: No, Big!! Move out of the--
*And the team is hit!*
Amy: x-x You guys..suck. *faints*
Big: Feels good...*faints as well*
*Cut to: Team Dork*
Rouge: That's Team Dark, you dumbass!!
*Stick and stones, red. Sticks and stones*
Shadow: Do any of you guys get an ominous feeling from this place?
Omega: The only feelings I have are feelings of hatred and teenage angst. Woe is me.
Rouge: You two have more in common than I realized.
Shadow: Oh shut up. *whispers* Woe is me.
Rouge: I heard that~!
Shadow: Damn it!
Rouge: I can't wait to pound Eggman's ass to the ground and steal his treasure! Let's hurry!
Shadow: Easier said than done. *points to all the ridiculous railings and crumbling platforms*
Rouge: Nothing we can't handle. We're the best team in this God-forsaken game.
*And so the team begins the level by jumping onto a high-suspension railing*
Omega: I was not made to grind on rails. *loses his balance and falls to his death* I regret nothing!
Rouge: Omega!! NOOOOO!!
Shadow: He's dead to us now. We have to keep going. It's what Omega would want.
Omega: *from a distance* I want you to save me.
Shadow: u-u It's what Omega would want.
Rouge: You're right.
*The duo lands on a platform*
Rouge: Which way do we go now?
Shadow: Hm. Let me stand here and ponder. Hey, does the platform seem to be shaking or am I having another seizure?
*The platform begins to crumble*
Rouge: Quick! Jump to the other platforms!
*As soon as Shadow jumps on the other platform, it explodes*
Shadow: I HATE THIS LEVEL!!! *falls to his doom*
Rouge: Curse you, Sonic Team!!!!! Why are you guys so obsessed with making the final level take place in the sky with a million rails and non-existent platforms? WHY?! *gets hit by a cannon* Et tu, cannon? *falls to her death*
*Dramatic much? Let's check on Team Chaotix*
Charmy: I think we should spend our money on bubblegum and candy!
Vector: I already told ya, we're buying a iPod so I can have something to plug my headphones into.
Charmy: Bubblegum!!
Vector: iPod!!!
Espio: We won't get that money unless we finish this mission!
Charmy/Vector: Oh yeah. I forgot about that. Stop saying whatever I say! AARGH!!
Charmy: How are we suppose to find five small keys on such a huge ship?!
Espio: Wait a minute. I sense a key nearby, but where? Where?
*The team is standing on a crate that's holding the key*
Espio: It's so close I can almost taste it.
Charmy: Does it taste like bubblegum? I want some!
Vector: Be quiet and let him concentrate!! *chokes Charmy*
*2 hours later*
Espio: I can't put my finger on it, but that key is really close.
Vector: *sniffle* And I really wanted that iPod.
*Vector plops down on the crate and it breaks, thus revealing the key*
Charmy: We found it!!!
Vector: We're the best detective ever!
Espio: Naturally!
Charmy: Group hug!!!
*The ultimate group hug attack! Except it's not really an attack. I'm lonely*
Dr. Egg: You fools!!! You still have four more keys to find!!
Team Chaotix: D'oh!!
*Let's go back to Team Sonic*
Sonic: We made it to the ship's core so fast, but I'm not really surprised.
Tails: Just be glad the author was too lazy to write anymore scenes from this level. Anyways we have exactly 30 seconds to destroy this place before the ship wrecks havoc on the entire planet!
Sonic: I'm not about to let that happen! I love this planet. It has all my favorite shows.
Knuckles: It's pounding time!!
*Meanwhile at the top of the flagship*
Amy: We finally made it to...here.
Eggman: What? You're 20 minutes early. I haven't finished my Egg Emperor yet, so if you'll just---
Amy: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
*Amy tackles Eggman to the ground and hits him repeatedly with her Piko Piko Hammer*
Big: I'm scared of the pink lady.
Cream: *hugs Cheese* Me too.
Big: She reminds me of mommy. I'm a good boy!! *rolls himself into a ball and cries*
Cream: oo; .....*walks away slowly*
Rouge: Team Badass is in the house!! Huh? *sees Amy beating Eggman senseless* Looks like we're too late.
Omega: Murder Dr. Eggman!
*Omega rushes over and starts shooting Eggman in the face and Amy continues to pound his lower half*
Rouge/Shadow: ..........
Rouge: ^^; You guys seem to have everything under control, so I'm just gonna go....*flies off to Eggman's secret treasure...room*
Shadow: I'll just wait here I guess.
*Eggman finally melts into a pile of goo and Froggy and Chocola chao materialize from the goo*
Omega: Mission complete. The doctor has been terminated. *walks off to wherever Rouge went*
Big: FROGGY!!!!!!!!!!!
Froggy: o-o!!! *tries to hop away, but he is too slow*
Big: *hugs/suffocates Froggy* Froggy!! I missed you sooo much. I promise to never let you out of my eyes.
Froggy: -_-;;;
Chocola: ....
Cheese: >:D Chao chao chao! (Translation: You can't run away from me, bitch!)
*Cheese strangles Chocola*
Cream: Oh Cheese, I'm so happy for you~!
*And so everyone walks away from the pile of goo*
Goo: Chaos data has been copied. *disappears*
Vector: So it looks like that Eggman was a fake, which means....
*Team Chaotix unlocks the cell and....*
Vector: Just as I suspected. Our client was Dr. Eggman!!!
Eggman: How did you figure it out?!
Vector: u-u It's what makes us great detectives.
Charmy: I can't believe it!
Espio: Who would've thought Dr. Egg was actually Dr. Eggman. To think I was fooled so easily.
Charmy: But we still get paid, right?
Eggman: Sure I'll pay you. I'll pay you when I rule the world!! MWAHAHAHA!!!
Charmy: Aw man! We'll never get that money!
Vector: *cracks knuckles*
Knuckles: OOOOOOW!!!
Vector: ...it's not right to promise something you don't even have.
Eggman: I know! That's what makes me an evil genius.
Vector: Let's get him, boys.
Eggman: Wait! Wait! What are you doing?! This is a children's game! You can't get this violent! AAAHHH!!!
*Cut to: Eggman's secret treasure room thing*
Rouge: Finally, the moment I've been waiting for. The treasure is all---Shadow?!
*The entire room is filled with pods containing Shadow clones*
Rouge: What the hell?! THIS is Eggman's treasure?! No man should have this many copies of Shadow. It's just disturbing on so many levels. Ugh!
Omega: Must annihilate all Eggman robots.
Rouge: Do what you have to do.
Omega: You know, the original copy has to be out there somewhere. I cannot offer anymore comfort.
Rouge: Thanks Omega. Hey, I didn't notice this camera here! *stands in front of the camera and poses*
*Meanwhile outside...*
Sonic: Phew. That was close, but we managed to destroy the core of the ship and save the world. Or something like that.
Knuckles: Weren't you scared at all?
Sonic: Hell no!
Knuckles: ADMIT THAT YOU WERE SCARED!!!!
Sonic: Okay! I was scared a little bit. Are you happy now? Anyways, thanks for your help.
Knuckles: You just admitted you were..scared?! And you thanked me? *has a heart attack*
Sonic: Tails, you did a good job too.
Tails: ;-; Really?
Sonic: No.
Tails: *weeps forever*
Cream: Hey, isn't that Mr. Sonic over there?
Amy: SONIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sonic: Oh damn.
*Amy latches on to Sonic and attempts to kiss him*
Sonic: Get it off me!! Date rape!!
Everyone else: *corny laugh*
*Back to Team Chaotix*
Vector: Now that we got punching you out of our system, why don't you tell us who locked you in here for being a bad boy and trying to rule the world.
Eggman: x.x If you step outside, then all your answers will be revealed.
*Outside, Metal Sonic appears before Sonic and the others*
Amy: Who's that sexy robot?
Metal Sonic: All living things kneel down before your master!
Knuckles: My only master is the Master Emerald!!
*Everyone else stares at Knuckles*
Knuckles: What? What?
Metal Sonic: Chaos Crisis Power Make Up!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rouge: *gasp* That transformation is kinda hot.
Knuckles: I'll say.
Everyone else: ....
Knuckles: Stop doing that!!
Eggman: Uh oh. It looks like Metal has finally transformed. That's what I get for waking him up and giving him a voice box.
Sonic: That's Metal?!
Eggman: No, it's a monkey. Of course it's Metal!!!
Sonic: Heh. Looks like you're not the main villain AGAIN.
Eggman: Silence!!!!!!! Anyways, Metal has combined all of your data with the power of chaos. There's no way we can stop him. I suggested we inhabit another planet, like maybe Jupiter.
Vector: Nah. Jupiter is a horrible name.
*Team Sonic, Team Dark, and Team Rose pull out chaos emeralds. A total of seven to be exact*
Eggman: What?! How the hell did you get those?
The teams: *shrug* Don't ask questions.
Eggman: Well, you're still gonna lose.
Charmy: But you just said--
Eggman: YOU'RE GOING TO LOSE!!!
Sonic: Just leave it to me, fat ass.
Amy: Sonic, no! I can't let you risk your life and fight the bad guy. You've never done anything so reckless before in your life!
Sonic: Shut your face. I'm gonna drag Tails and Knuckles along.
KnuxTails: WHAT?!
Shadow: Okay, I'm going to volunteer everyone and we're all going to distract Metal long enough for you guys to use your super powers. Man, that sounds lame.
Sonic: Awesome. All this talk of team work makes me feel all warm inside.
Rouge: Oh no. I smell a long speech coming up.
Sonic: It's not often that people get together to stop a monster. Sure, we all fought each other for reasons I can't remember, but to be able to put all that aside is really---
Shadow: Chaos Blast!!
Sonic: OW!!! Okay, okay. I won't say anymore...except let's show that creep the true super power of TEAM WORK!!!
Everyone else: *groans*
SonTailsKnux: Chaos Crystal Power--
Amy: Enough!! That joke is so played out.
*So, Sonic transforms into Super Sonic and Knuckles and Tails are engulfed by a gold sphere. Whaaatever*
Knuckles: I wonder how the others are going to distract Metal.
Amy: Hey Metal! Look at us being all distracting!! Are you distracted yet?
*Metal Sonic fires a laser at Team Rose*
Team Rose: x-x
Tails: oo We better hurry.
Sonic: Okay, let's focus all our energy into one blast and hey, look at the clouds! Cool!
KnuxTails: Sonic!!
Sonic: ^^; Whoops.
Rouge: Oh Metal~! Look what I've got. *shows Metal a picture of some x-rated robots. Ew*
Metal Sonic: ...
Shadow: Where did you get those?
Omega: Certainly not from me. Why would you accuse me of such a thing?
Shadow: ...freak.
*Metal Sonic electrocutes the trio of darkness*
Vector: Things are not looking good, boys.
Espio: It was a pleasure working with you two.
Charmy: I used your toothbrush to unclog the toilet.
Espio: What?!
*Team Chaotix gets pwned by Metal Sonic*
Sonic: Okay, that's long enough. ULTRA SHINY BALL ATTACK!!!!
Metal Sonic: No! My one true weakness!!!
*Metal Sonic has totally just been defeated. He totally de-transforms and it's so pathetic. Don't give me that look*
Metal Sonic: Why? Why can't I defeat you?
Sonic: Because we're Sonic Heroes!!!
*Team Sonic does the lamest pose ever*
Sonic: I'm gonna let you run free and try to destroy the world. If you ever what a rematch though, just call me.
Omega: Metal Sonic cannot hear you for he is dead.
Sonic: Oh. That's cool too.
Amy: ^o^ Now we can get married, Sonic!!
Sonic: Uh oh. It's time I run away in a comical fashion! Later~!
Tails: Wait for me, Sonic! I like running away in a comical fashion too!
Knuckles: *chuckles* Man, that Sonic sure does have his hands full. I don't sound like a dork at all.
Rouge: Well I guess I'll go steal someone else's treasure. *glances at Knuckles*
Knuckles: ....?
Rouge: God, you're slow. *flies away*
Cream: Oh you guys! *laughs*
Big: Froggy and me go home now! Whee! *jumps off the airship...and falls to his death*
Vector: That's the end of this case and it's the end of us.
Charmy: What about my bubblegum?
Espio: That's right. We need to beat the money out of Eggman.
Eggman: Oh crap!! I hate that hedgehog!!! *wobbles away*
Knuckles: ....hey!!! Don't you dare steal my Master Emerald, bat-girl!!! *glides off*
Shadow: ...
Omega: *holds Metal Sonic*
Shadow: So, you want to join me in my quest to find out about my past?
Omega: Negative.
Shadow: Why not?
Omega: Something suddenly came up.
Shadow: ....are you going to hump that dead robot?
Omega: ....does not compute.
Shadow: You're a freak, Omega.
Yes he is. And this concludes our story. Did it make any sense at all? No!!! And that's why you shouldn't play Sonic Heroes. Save your precious time and pie. Anymoo, thanks for reading. Peace out!!