Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Freaky Friday: Yu-Gi-Oh! Style ❯ Chapter 3

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh!

Stuff:Nooooooooooothing.

`Joey' - Kaiba in Joey's body
`Kaiba' - Joey in Kaiba's body



With an exasperated sigh, `Joey' finally arrived at the familiar apartment building and angrily threw his stuff onto the floor. He paused to take in his surroundings, scowling at everything in the current room. The place reeked of piss and mold, and it looked like it hadn't seen any form of cleaning in years. As opposed to his mansion, which usually gave off a relaxed, laid-back feeling, this place made him feel like throwing up. He thought he heard something move off to his left and spun around, ready to fight, but rolled his eyes when a cockroach skittered underneath the couch.Wonderful. Whatin God's namedid I do to deserve this?He glanced up at the clock, jumping a little when he saw something move again…but it was just his shadow.Three thirty…He works at five…Why I'm even going to work for him, I'll never know…Maybe because I'm such akindand considerateperson…smirked to himself at how funny that sounded and looked around again.

`Joey' decided to explore a little, starting with the kitchen first. It was nothing to brag about - a stove, refrigerator, microwave, etc. - the basic stuff. He noticed piles upon piles of empty pizza boxes and gave a disgusted snort.Stupid pig of a dog…then went into the living room, watching out for the cockroach he had seen earlier, and looked out of the huge window. He saw somebody across the street shove someone into the side of a car, and quickly slammed the curtains shut with widened eyes.This isnotfair.tried to clear his head of the overwhelming negative energy of this environment, and avoided the bathroom, going straight to Joey's room. He was surprised at how clean it was compared to the house.

`Joey' instinctively brushed his finger across the top of Joey's desk by the window, giving the desk a disgusted look when a clearly visible line appeared after the path of his finger. Now he's adirtypig of a dog…He decided to take a rest and sat down at the desk, turning on the junk heap of a computer he saw buried. When it didn't respond to any sort of punching, kicking, or banging, he quickly hunted down a screwdriver and got to work…

***Kaiba's Mansion***

“BOOORN TO BE WILLLLLD!!!” Kaiba's voice echoed throughout the huge mansion, but something that Kaiba wouldneverwas taking place…Kaiba, or his body anyways, was surfing down thehugeof stairs on a mattress. “BOOYAH!!!” `Kaiba' landed on the floor, laughing hysterically, and continued grinning widely.Awman, dis is awesome!!He started to haul the mattress up the stairs again when he heard the front door open, and his eyes widened when he thought of what Kaiba would do to him if Mokuba saw him like this… He just tried to sprint upstairs, still hauling the mattress…and winced when he heard Mokuba's voice.

“Um…Seto…?” Mokuba completely froze in his spot and stared blankly at `Kaiba'.

“Oh, uh…Hi!” `Kaiba' said enthusiastically. “How was school?” He grinned sheepishly and tried to hide the bulky mattress as he slowly backed upstairs.Screw bein'sadistic…Dis is freakin'awesome!!!

“…fine…” Mokuba said with the same blank stare. “…Why do you have a mattress behind your back?”

“Huh?” `Kaiba' looked over his shoulder like the mattress had just magically appeared, and just shrugged. “I was…switching mattresses in the rooms…and I uh…fell. Yeah, that's it.” He grinned and waved Mokuba off. “Go do your homework now.”

“We havemaidsmoving things,” Mokuba said with the same strange look as he approached `Kaiba'. “And what the heck are you wearing?!”

`Kaiba' grinned, but then looked down at his outfit of jeans, a black AC/DC shirt he had sent out for, and a long, long-sleeved, black trenchcoat (just for the fun of it), and shrugged. “What's wrong with it?”

“…nothing…” Mokuba started up the stairs and glared at Kaiba. “What'swrongyou?”

`Kaiba's' grin faded and he frowned at Mokuba. “Nothing…Why?”

Mokuba rolled his eyes and walked over the mattress. “You're seeing a psychiatristtonight. I don't care what you say - I'll lock you in your room if I have to!!!” He suddenly took off running towards the nearest phone, glancing over his shoulder to make sure he wasn't being followed.

Oh, crap…He's gonna kill me!`Kaiba's' heart stopped for a few seconds when he thought of all the ways the real Kaiba would kill him for getting him involved with a shrink… He suddenly took off running after Mokuba and grabbed his shoulders. “Wait!” he panted.Geez, doesn't dis dude ever run?!“I'm fine.”

“Then why were youdragging a mattress upstairs?!” Mokuba said with a concerned look and tone as he turned around to face `Kaiba'.

“Do youreallyto know?” `Kaiba' smirked and started to walk back to the stairs, motioning for Mokuba to follow. “C'mon.”

Mokuba raised an eyebrow, but he still followed.I seriously hope he isn't going insane…He just watched with a blank look as he saw `Kaiba' finish dragging the mattress upstairs, and then plant his feet on it. “What are you doing?!” Mokuba suddenly shrieked.

“Just watch.” `Kaiba' gave Mokuba a reassuring smirk, and then gently scooted the mattress forward. It finally hit the stairs and he slid downfast, finally hitting the ground and falling flat on his face. He just stood up, laughed, and brushed himself off, grinning up at Mokuba. “See?”

Mokuba looked like he was ready to choke `Kaiba' to death, but then he burst out into laughter and slid down the stair banister. “Awesome! Lemme try!”

“Get your own mattress,” `Kaiba' snapped with a grin as he started to drag his own back upstairs. “And be careful,” hefinally“Try to shift your center of gravity to your legs.”

Mokuba sprinted upstairs, coming back soon with a mattress of his own. “This seems like something Joey would do,” he said with a snicker.

`Kaiba' just smirked nervously and helped give Mokuba his first nudge…

***Joey's Apartment***

About an hour later, `Joey' finally got the junky computer up and running.How theheckdoes he afford this, anyways? And does he have internet…?Before he had a chance to check, he exploded in a bout of sneezing. He sneezed for a solid minute before almost resorting to stuffing something up his nose or down his throat. “What da heck is wrong wit me?!” he finally screamed when the sneezing subsided.Allergies…he finally thought after remembering hearing Joey whine about them whenever he had a chance.

`Joey' went on a mad search for some kind of medicine, and he discovered a bottle of prescription strength allergy medicine after digging through all the paper and junk on the desk. He ignored the instructions, since he never actuallyneededpills, and swallowed two. He went back to the computer, but then realized it was about twenty till five.Oh, well…I might as well go early and get him a little bit of extra money since there's absolutely nothingto do around here…

A few minutes later, `Joey' arrived at the nearby grocery store heassumedJoey worked at, since the stupid blond had forgotten to saywherehe actually worked. After getting clocked in, he went to the closest empty aisle.I neverdreamedI'd stoop as low as this…Stupid dog.few minutes later, he was tapped on the shoulder by somebody and he turned around. “What?” he snapped.

“Just saying hi…” Téa took a few steps backward.

Huh. Guess she works here, too. “Oh. Hey.”

“Are you feeling okay?” Téa stared at ‘Joey’, her face etched with concern.

“I’m fine.” ‘Joey’ turned around and went back to bagging. Téa normally annoyed him, as did the rest of their little pack, but at least she was a familiar face.

Téa seemed to get the hint. She took her place at the aisle beside ‘Joey’ and left him alone for the first hour.

After the first hour had passed, Téa finally spoke up. “What’s going on with you today, Joe?  You’re never like this.”

“Bad day,” `Joey' mumbled. His head was starting to feel light, and over the past hour he had started yawning uncontrollably.

“Must be really bad.” Téa gave him a look of pity. “Let me know if you need anything, okay?”

“Yep.”

***Kaiba's Mansion***

Mokuba was laughing uncontrollably as he continued trying to smack `Kaiba' with his mattress. “Geez, Seto, I never knew you knew how to have so much fun withmattresses!”

`Kaiba' grinned and smacked Mokuba with his own mattress. For the past hour, they had been in mattress heaven. They had mattress surfed, seen who could mattress jump the longest (Mokuba won), and even tried to mattress beat each other to the ground. He finally collapsed onto his mattress and continued grinning. “Geez, I'm worn out…”

Mokuba laughed and continued jumping like a maniac. “Yeah, me too!”

“Still think I'm insane?” `Kaiba' grinned up at Mokuba and finally managed to stand up. “I could go to sleep right now…”

“You're always like that.” Mokuba laughed and finally started to drag his mattress back upstairs. “This was so much fun! I mean, usually you're all depressed and mad and stuff…”

Geez, no kiddin.`Kaiba' grinned to himself and yelled for a maid to haul his own mattress. He finally realized how hungry he was and hunted down the kitchen based on Kaiba's map, which he had memorized. Soon after, he was pigging out on donuts, ice cream, cookies, and everything else loaded with fat and sugar in sight. He continued humming the “Born to Be Wild” tune as he stuffed his face full of food.

Mokuba came back down a few minutes later and his jaw dropped at the sight before him. “Seto…? Okay, it's official. You'rereally starting to creep me out.”

`Kaiba' just grinned and tossed a donut to Mokuba. “Here. Pig out.”

Mokuba ran over and jerked `Kaiba's' collar. “Who are you, and what have you done with my brother?!”

Joey Wheeler, and he's stuck in my body. `Kaiba' just shrugged and stuffed a donut into Mokuba's mouth. “Hakuna matata,” he smirked.

“Since when do you quote `The Lion King'?” Mokuba said around a mouth of icing coated donut.

Since I saw it a billion times with Serenity when I was five…`Kaiba' shrugged again, and then he realized that hereallyneeded to straighten up. Before he knew it, he'd end up getting carried away and skydiving off the roof or something. “I'm fine,” he finally said with a calm tone. “Too much coffee.”

“Dude, tell me about it.” Mokuba laughed, sat down, and grabbed a Pop Tart. “I like it when you're fun like this better…it's just kinda freaky, y'know?”

“Mm-hm…”Aw, poor kid. Kaiba should be like dis more around him. I bet he'snevamattress surfed his whole freakin'life!“Go do your homework, okay?” he finally said as he ruffled Mokuba's hair with a smile.

“Okay!” Mokuba ran out of the room, upstairs, and into his room.

`Kaiba' finally left the kitchen also and set off to explore.

***Meanwhile…***

Just a few hours hour later, `Joey' was already fed up with his situation.  The longer the night dragged on, the woozier he felt.  He was to the point of having to hold onto the plastic bag holder to keep himself standing. “What time is it?” he asked Téa, massaging his temples with one hand.

“Nine,” Téa said. “You always crack at about this time…I'd think you were used to this by now.” She offered a smile.

`Joey' just scowled at her behind her back. Suddenly, his vision started to blur, but he just shook his head and blinked hard.Great… Now I'm goingblindon top of all this…

Téa frowned at `Joey's' strange behavior, but she didn't say anything.

Over the next several minutes, `Joey' had slowed down considerably, and his knees had buckled a few times.What the…! Why does all thiscraphave to happen tome?!He moaned and clutched his head, starting to feel like the whole world was spinning around him.

“You okay?” Téa frowned again at Joey. “Are you on drugs?”

`Joey' groaned again when he felt like a sledgehammer had been slammed into his head, but forced himself to ignore whatever was going on. After the bad spell of wooziness had passed, his eyelids drooped and he yawned about every thirty seconds.

“Joey! Seriously, what is going on with you?” Téa left her aisle and put her hand on ‘Joey’s’ arm to steady him.

“I don’t know,” ‘Joey’ snapped. He wiggled away from Téa’s touch. I think I do, actually…Heh. Yeah, that's it. I'm just goinginsane…that's all.ignored the strange stares from the cashier and continued bagging to the best of his ability, even though he was starting to grab around for objects that were floating around his vision.

`Joey' suddenly giggled and held up a carton of milk in one hand, and what appeared to be an invisible carton of milk in the other. “`Ey, lookie! She gots two a' everythin! Ain't dat shmart?” He laughed again, but suddenly his eyes rolled back into his head and he collapsed onto the floor in a dead faint.

Many of the people waiting in line gasped, but Téa just laughed nervously and hauled `Joey' up by his armpits. “Rough day,” she mumbled. She quickly found another bagger to cover for ‘Joey’ and had another help her drag him outside.

Téa and the other bagger dragged a snoring ‘Joey’ to her car, and once they had him situated in the passenger seat and buckled in, she collapsed into the driver’s seat. After about five seconds, ‘Joey’s’ phone went off and she quickly answered. “Hello?”

“Téa?” `Kaiba' was lying on `his' bed while pigging out on ice cream. He instantly clamped his mouth shut at what he said and cleared his throat. “I mean, who is this?”

“Kaiba? It’s Téa…”

“Um, I need to talk to Kai-…er, Joey,” `Kaiba' corrected with a slap to his forehead.Act like Kaiba, moron!

“He's um…out,” Téa said with a sideways glance to a still snoring `Joey'. “Why do you wanna talk to Joey? He’s already having a bad enough day as it is.”

“Where'd he go?” `Kaiba' said, his stomach suddenly in knots at all of the possibilities that could’ve happened..Dis is weird… Kaiba goes somewhere and leaves my phone withTéa? He doesn’t even like her.

“Well…” Téa started to drive to Joey's apartment. “He kinda…passed out.”

What daheck?!inhaled something chunky in his ice cream, and he started to hack hysterically. “Hewhat?!” he shrieked. “Why?!”Dat stupid sonova… What daheckdid he do?!

“Why do you care so much, Kaiba?” Téa snapped. “And why are you calling Joey? He doesn’t need a hard time from you right now.”

“Just, uh…have him call me. It’s private.”

“Um…fine. Will do.” Téa shut the phone before she could get a response and put the phone back in ‘Joey’s’ pocket.

`Kaiba'  hung up also. He then went back to eating and surfing the web, while occasionally checking up on Kaiba Corp.Wow, dis is really an awesome life! An'he says it ain't easy…dat filthy liar.

Meanwhile… Téa hadfinallymanaged to haul `Joey' up two flights of stairs and into his apartment. She dragged him to his room and flung him onto the bed, plopping down onto her butt to take a rest. “Geez,” she panted, “You wouldn’t think he weighs that much.” She then got a glass of cold water from the bathroom and carried it back to Joey's room. I could be nice…nah.

`Joey' instantly bolted upright, spluttering and coughing everywhere.What in the…glared at Téa, who had an obvious fake-innocent expression. “You couldn’t have let me sleep it off?!”

“Oh, I'm sorry,” Téa taunted. “Was that too cold?”

`Joey' shook his head to clear it. “What happened?” he mumbled.

“…you passed out at work. Have you been drinking?” Téa sat on the edge of the bed and stared down at ‘Joey’, looking deeply concerned.

“No…” `Joey' looked around the room, and his eyes came to rest on the bottle of allergy medicine. “Oh, crap...” He hobbled over to the desk on wobbly legs and squinted at the instructions:

`Take one pill by mouth daily for severe allergy symptoms. Warning: Do not take more than one pill every six hours. Doing so may cause nausea, extreme drowsiness, blurry and/or double vision, etc. Do not operate heavy machinery…'

“Welldatit,” `Joey' muttered. He stumbled back to the bed and sat down by Téa. “I think I need to go back to sleep.”

“Don’t do that again, Joey…you really scared me. I was about to call the hospital.”

“I’m fine.” ‘Joey’ grabbed a blanket and curled up in his bed, already about to pass out again. “Thanks for bringin’ me home.”

Téa took the hint and got her keys and purse. “Are you sure you’re okay? Do you need anything to eat or drink?”

“No,” ‘Joey’ mumbled. I’ve taken care of myself practically my whole life. I’m not about to become a charity case. He was already almost asleep again, but Téa once again kept him from going to sleep.

“Joey, why is Kaiba calling you?”

“Huh?”

“Kaiba called while you were passed out.  He said to call him back as soon as you can.”

“Son of a bitch,” ‘Joey’ mumbled, feeling around for his phone. Téa placed it in his hand before mumbling a quick “see ya” and leaving.

My cell phone? Wheeler… Great. I wonder what he broke.`Joey' shook his head once more to attempt to wake up.  He dialed his cell phone, waiting impatiently for an answer.

`Kaiba' had just finished eating another gallon of ice cream when he heard `his' cell phone ring.Dude, he needs a ring tone…“Yeah? Er, Seto Kaiba.”

“Funny,” `Joey' snapped. “Why'd ya call?” He somehow managed to drag himself out of bed and tap into one of the neighbor's satellite services, and soon after, he was on the internet.

“No reason… Having fun?” `Kaiba' joked. “BECAUSE I SURE AS HELL AM!” He laughed and downloaded a nice new collection of music for his mp3 player..

“No,” `Joey' snapped viciously. “Whadja break?”

“Nothing!” `Kaiba' said innocently. “Well, if you count that plate of cookies…but that's it.” He cleared his throat and chewed on taffy. “So why did you pass out?”

“…they should make those allergy medicine instructions bigger…” `Joey' mumbled with an embarrassed tone.

“…you didn't.”

“Mm-hm…” `Joey' braced himself for what he knew was coming…lots and lots of yelling.

“…how many?” `Kaiba' slapped his forehead, but he still continued eating. Nothing could get between him and an endless supply of sugary foods!

“…two.” `Joey' winced a little, and then held the phone away from his head just in time to save his eardrums.

“Two?! Are you serious?!” `Kaiba' slammed the phone down angrily.Dat selfish jerk!He coulda sent me to the hospital!! He issogetting hisbuttkicked tomorrow!I don't give a crap if it'smybody…soon after the yelling bout, he calmed down and continued playing on Kaiba's laptop. Not surprisingly, pretty much all of the sites in the CEO's history folder were websites all about him - fansites, news sites with stories about him, etc.

`Joey' finally hung up also and rolled his eyes.It's not like I did permanent damage to his already-tiny brain…finally got off Joey's computer and lay back down on the bed.Now, therehas to besome way to reverse this…whatever it is. I wonder if Mokuba has ever seen a movie with this situation - he's seen everything else… I'lltell Wheeler to ask him tomorrow. That is, ifhe doesn'ttry tokill me first…sighed exasperatedly and closed his eyes, surprisingly drifting off to sleep quickly.

`Kaiba' stayed awake for another few hours, and finally his eyes started to droop also. He checked the Kaiba Corp. site one last time, and, when everything looked normal to him, he plopped down onto the huge, fluffy bed and lay awake for several minutes just like `Joey'.Wow…dis is like a dream come true! I mean, yeah, I wishI actually hadmybody, but hey, dis is good enough for me.closed his eyes and fell into a heavy sleep also.

Notes: All the revisions are done :) I got rid of the OC because she annoyed me and I’d really like to just stick to the original cast. I know Téa doesn’t have a lot of fans, but I plan on toning her down for this and making her tolerable, maybe even liked? :P Anyways, I guess I’ll try to write new stuff from this point on. It’s hard to find a lot of free time working 40 hours a week and going to school and attempting to have a life, but I shall try. Thanks to Guardiansaiyan for re-motivating me :)
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