Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Live Like You Were Dying ❯ Chapter 8 ( Chapter 8 )

Sorry for the delay....here is the last chapter...

 

Also my email has acted up and deleted who I sent stuff to...I had promised a while ago that I would send my reviewers somethin if they left me an email address. If you never got it, I am completely sorry and you may tell me so and I will send it to you, also if you just found the story feel free to leave me the email and I'll send it to you...

 

Well we have finally hit it- the end of this story. Anyways there will be no A/n at the end of this chapter (for I feel they would ruin the mood).

 

Once again- I do not know how hospitals in Japan work and I know a little about them here, if I do get anything wrong please feel free to tell me.

 

Anyways on with the final chapter and for the weepers here are a few boxes of tissues for you to use, just please use a trashcan.

 

X-X-X-

 

The cold white tile floor of the Emergency Room had yet another companion as Keiko slowly sunk to her knees beside the distraught woman. Quietly the young girl laid her petite head against the shuddering back capturing the woman in a deep, comforting hug.

A red eyed Shiori slowly lifted her head from the plastic seat long enough to glance back at the girl who now cried into her back. Gently she laid back on the chair. Though tears no longer fell from her eyes she was still crying on the inside.

 

Shizuru laid on the hard plastic chair her back bent sharply, legs tucked underneath her chin and a warm hand overlapping a scar adorned hand. A single solitary tear had escaped from the closed lid, making its way down her cheek leaving a small trail behind it.

 

Yukina sat on a chair deeply lost in her thoughts. Fear of a friend dying kept her in the catatonic-like state. Nothing would shake the ice maiden from her trance. Even caring words from Hiei fell upon deaf ears. Botan was desperately trying to wake the sea-green haired beauty all the while trying to shake away the feeling of déjà vu.

 

Kuwabara stood under the door way, annoying the nurses to no end. Already he had been told less then politely to move his big butt from the door. As stubborn as always the carrot top had outright refused to move.

 

Receiving yet another rude shake of the head, the stout nurse threw up her arms in annoyance. And people wondered why she never wanted to have children. Roughly she picked up her charts ready to take out some of her anger on a couple of patient's arms.

 

Kuwabara's big eyes went back out to the parking lot. How could this be happening? Why now, Kurama had just got home from the hospital. Was that even fair to make one person suffer so? The large teen threw a glance over to the fire demon, maybe life was not as wonderful as everyone always tried to make it out to be. After all they had seen the worse of the worse. If it were not for them the world would have been completely different.

 

Stretching- and much to the delight of the nurses- Kuwabara slowly walked away from the doors allowing them to close for the first time in an hour. “Heck, life is not fair. That's all that is to it.”

 

Slowly he sat next to two of his friends biting sharply on the inside of his mouth. Crying would not help, he had to be tough for everyone.

 

X-X-X-

 

Kurama laid on the bed a light green mask covering his face. Bright lights from overhead made it impossible for him to keep his eyes open. Raspy breaths slowly entered and exited the teen's mouth. But still one word was able to escape from the pale lips, “Hiei.”

 

Doctors frantically ran around trying to stabilize the fading teen. Adriolin levels ran high as the experienced doctors shouted orders to the newer, inexperienced ones. Medicine was tossed from hand to hand as they franticly raced against time.

 

One nurse threw her dark blonde hair back as she once again poked the arm for hopes of finding a nonexistent vein. Already she had tried twice, to no avail. And it seemed as though this one was going to turn out the same way too. Looking up with pitied blue eyes she shook her head slightly. Without the medicine the teen would die, but there was no where left to stick a needle into. Pushing the iv away from the bed she sadly turned away. The doctor had already given the orders to not make him suffer with unnecessary pain.

 

Kurama glanced over to the large swinging doors. There, there he was. Smiling the teen slowly stretched out his arm. There was his friend, his lover. The one who had scorn him and kept him away. But still he felt the same love back, right?

 

“Hiei, oh Hiei I'm sorry will you forgive me. I never meant to hurt you.” Turning to the side, he tried his best to stretch his hand out further. He just needed his dark friend to understand. He had to know that his feeling were true. He just had to. Moaning and fighting against the doctors who held him down Kurama cried out, “Hiei!”

 

One young doctor looked over to the doors and saw nothing. Smiling she gently lowered herself down to the teen's level. “There's no one there sweetie. But if you hold on we will let you see your family, just be patient.”

 

But Kurama refused to believe her. How could she not see that scowl on Hiei's handsome face. Or his arms crossed in annoyance. Or those blood red eyes that held so many emotions. He may have only been able to see blurs of colors, but that one face was burned into his memory.

 

`His eyes, they give him away. They betray him too easily. Like when they showed the hurt and surprise that Hiei felt when I walked away from him and Gouki with the forlorn hope. Yusuke had thought that Hiei was mad, but I knew better. If Hiei was mad then I would have never been able to walk away from the fight that would have occurred. But no he let me walk away after I explained myself.

 

Then at Maze Castle. While holding up the collapsible roof and arguing with Yusuke about letting us perish. His eyes gave him away again. Yusuke and Kuwabara were truly afraid that he would let us die. But I had been able to read his eyes. At that point he considered us his friends and he would have never do that to us.

 

At the Dark Tournament I read all of the fear that he had felt while watching us fight. And though he would never admit it, I read the fear that those crimson orbs felt while getting ready to fight.

 

But why could I not read his eyes. Curse this lack of sight. Hiei are you really mad at me? Will you ever forgive me for what I did to you?'

 

A lone tear fell from the sightless emerald eye. Silently it slithered down the cheek leaving a glistening trail behind it. Hitting the mask it slowly disappeared. Kurama's hand slowly fell to his side as a clear liquid dripped into the needle in his arm. Closing his eyes, he slowly drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

 

Kurama groggily opened his eyes and took in the room he was in. It was different then where he had previously been. For no longer were there bright lights in his eyes confusing his eyes on what colors there were. His acute hearing did not pick up the endless yelling that there had been. This room seemed to have a serene atmosphere to it. One that allowed for last minutes to be peaceful.

 

Slowly the quiet room started to fill with smells and noises that he recognized. He could smell his mother's perfume, the same one she always wore. How sweet it always made her smell.

 

Right behind her was the strong stench of hair gel. Wrinkling his nose Kurama made a mental note to once again tell Yusuke that he used way to much gel. Especially for his super sensitive nose.

 

Two smells blended in together. How sweet they smelt too. The smell of the frosty winter nights mingled with a slight touch of sweet innocence. How he loved Yukina's smell, so sweet and it never overpowered anything. Blended with her sweet smell was a deeper smell of innocence. Deep inside he laughed, Kuwabara had to be the only man in the world with such a smell. Most men lost that innocence soon after they learn to talk. But somehow Kuwabara had been able to keep it. How Kurama envied him for that.

 

Then entered the next set of smells. Peonies flooded into the room making Kurama cough lightly. Such a large amount of flowers in such a small room. That had to be no other then Botan. He could hear her sniffle back another batch of tears. How he hated it when people cried for him. It made Kurama feel so weak and his Youko heritage hated that. Keiko's teen perfume ran out strongly overpowering the smell of peonies. Once again the fox had to wrinkle his nose at the smell of it. Had women ever heard of more is not always better?

 

Shizuru was next, her body reeked of cigarettes and sake. She could not hide the fact that she drank from Kurama for he could always smell it on her. Her heavy footfalls stayed far away, as though she did not want to come to close.

 

Sniffing the room again he did not smell one scent that he had been longing for. No where among his family and friends did he smell the sweet smell that a summer afternoon had with traces of the frosty winter nights.

 

`Is Hiei really mad at me? Did I really break our friendship by telling my true feelings.'

 

Kurama's already shattered heart slowly broke in half again. His love had left him. And Kurama had hoped to apologize. He wanted to beg for forgiveness. He was ready to swallow back his feelings, if it meant that Hiei would be happy. He would gladly tell Hiei that he was wrong. That what he had lied. That he had lied in hopes to bring down yet another person.

 

`Yes Hiei,' he would say, `you were right. I do not truly love you. I only said that to bring you down too. I was selfish and I'm sorry.' But not anymore.

 

Slowly the day passed with everyone around his bedside. Everyone but the one that he wanted. Small talk was passed though Kurama barely heard it. Deep within he hated himself for not listening better, especially since he would not be able to see these people ever again. But his mind toiled around the damage that he caused his friend, the one he loved dearly. If only it could have been mended, mended with a lie.

 

With visiting hours soon over, everyone slowly said their good-byes. And once again Kurama was left in a quiet, peaceful room. Kurama hated the silence with a vengeance. Right now Kurama almost begged for one of his mother's cheesy albums to be echoing through out the house.

 

Smiling he could remember the fights they would have over the music. What he wanted and she liked were two totally different things. On long rainy afternoons they would mock fight over the radio stations. She would set it on her favorite station and walk away. Then with a thief's craftiness he would sneak over and change it. Being sure to flee the scene of the crime before he got caught, only to have the station changed soon after he left. How fast time would go with them switching the stations so frequently.

 

Such good times those were.

 

And how Kurama wished that they could last. How he wished that he could go back home and play that game again.

 

Slowly he shifted in the bed, content for a long night's sleep. It had been an emotionally tiring day and Kurama was ready for it to be over. Painfully he turned to his side his empty eyes looking out the window.

 

Such a chilled night that it was. Winter would be setting in early this year. Smiling Kurama threw the thin white blanket over his head. Wintry nights always made him think of Hiei. About him knocking on the window, his rippling muscles, his wonderful smell. If Kurama's mind was given the chance it would begin to dream of the future. And always they were together living happily.

 

Slowly the sightless eyes drooped shut, content on sleeping away their agony. Digging deep into his pillow Kurama sighed peacefully ready for the soft mattress to take him away.

 

With a jolt his eyes flew opened. That noise...that smell. He recognized it. Biting his lip he refused to move, fearful that it may be just a dream. But even if it was he wanted it to stay. He wanted nothing to ruin this, even if it meant that he had to stay hidden under these covers.

 

Soft clicks upon the carpet filled Kurama's ears. He had heard these boots before. But still he refused to move.

 

Soft breaths flowed over the thin blanket embracing the shivering teen. But still he refused to acknowledge it.

 

Soft weight pushed the side of the bed down. Holding his breath Kurama closed his eyes. It had to be yet another nurse. Or maybe it was the kid in the other room, he had seemed pretty lonely.

 

`It can't be him, there is no possible way.' Another hot tear slid down his cheek hitting the pale green mask again.

 

Neither figure moved for what seemed to be an eternity.

 

Finally curiosity got the better of Kurama, he had to know who was there. Even if it was all just a dream. If he were to awaken then let it be.

 

Slowly he turned pulling the blanket that had covered his figure. And stared into…

 

…the sweetest crimson eyes in the world.

 

Joy filled his heart as he pinched himself, “ow.” It was true, Hiei was really here. Springing up he embraced the surprised demon in a tight hug.

 

Letting go the red head blushed. He had to let Hiei go, explain that it was all just a lie. That meant no more hugs, no more smiles, no more dreams of them together.

 

Kurama stared at his hands. “I thought you were mad at me.” He felt the boy next to him shift. Scared Kurama wanted to stop right there and leave the rest unsaid, but he knew that that was impossible, he had to continue, “I just wanted to tell you that I was sorry and that…”

 

Hiei shook his head while meeting Kurama's eyes. “Shhh. Don't lie. I know what you said earlier was true,” Kurama tried to argue gently shaking his head. But Hiei would not stand for it, “I know it was true. Because,” he stopped glancing down, “because I feel it too.”

 

Kurama just stared, was it true? Did Hiei just admit his feelings.

 

Burning tears welled up as he continued, “I'm so sorry Kurama. I'm sorry that I was not there for you. That I acted the way I did.” Stretching over he kissed the pale forehead. “I just did not want to know that you were dying. That the only person that I ever cared for was leaving me behind. I'm so sorry.”

 

No longer did the dams hold back the water. Pouring freely from his eyes hot tears streaked down his face splashing against the mask. “Hiei,” words froze as the fire demon gently removed the green mask capturing his lips in a passionate kiss. Closing his eyes Kurama deepened the kiss entangling his hands within the black hair, moaning slightly. This was the one thing he had dreamt of for a year now.

 

Slowly Hiei pulled away. He scooted closer to Kurama, his love, lying beside him. He would spend the night here, not caring of who saw or of what anyone said.

 

Smiling Kurama laid snuggling close to the warm body. This was the one thing he wanted before he died. Now Kurama felt as though he could die in peace, with nothing to haunt him.

 

X-X-X-

 

The next morning the rising sun's bright rays hit Tokyo engulfing it in its glory. All around birds sang their glorious praises as the flowers blossomed showing all of their beauty.

 

Nicely dressed men and women ran down the sidewalk hoping to make it to work on time. Games of tag and hide and seek were being played. As were action figures and dolls. Children shouted in the school yard as teenagers sat on the corner waiting for the school bell to ring. A grinning young mother entered the metal gate into the park, her tiny daughter jumping merrily in her arms.

 

But within the tiny hospital the mood was less then joyous. A middle aged mother fell to her knees in agony. Her son, her pride and joy, of sixteen years was gone. Gone and was to never return.

 

But she was not alone in her suffering for standing beside her was a roomful of friends. Together they all shed tears for the one that they had lost.

 

Though none could match the fire demon who had lost the only one he had loved. Hiei stared out the window, glaring at these people below them. How could they be happy on such a day. Why could they not experience the same pain he now felt.

 

Punching the windowsill he slowly walked out of the room. He could no longer stand staring out the window at the happy people below.

 

Stopping at the snack room Hiei stared at the enormous selection before him. Though he could not stomach to eat anything. It made him sick to see those merry people. Sick to his stomach. Anger flowed freely in his veins as his fist slammed mercilessly against the vending machine. Hot tears streamed down his face as he shouted to the chips, "Why Kurama, why did you have to leave?" Falling to his knees he had to ask once again, "Why not me?!"

 

X-X-X-

 

A brown haired woman dressed in black stared at the casket before her. This was the last time he would be with him.

 

Suichi or Kurama, Kurama or Suichi- no matter what name he went by he was still the best thing to happen to her.

 

A shadowed figure walked stooping by the trees, not wanting to get any closer. There he stood silently watching the procession, tears hidden from the shadows the branches created.

 

Though Kurama's `fan club' had not shown, the funeral was still good sized. Slowly one by one the mourners walked up dropping a rose upon the casket, upon their friend.

 

The figure smiled as he watched them slowly walk up. Yusuke went first, always the leader. Right behind him was Keiko though she seemed hesitant to approach, it was just like her to be fearful of such a thing. Botan walked up tears falling from her eyes, as did Yukina. Sparkling stones slammed against the dirt bouncing lightly. Kuwabara comforted both of them being the gentleman he was.

 

Koenma brought up the rear in his teenage form, without his pacifier. Chuckling lightly the figure lowered his head, `I guess a pacifier sucking teenaged boy would have risen some suspicions. As if the stones falling from Yukina's eyes won't.'

 

Unknown people, to the figure at least, walked up dropping a flower upon the casket. He seriously began to wonder if bums from the street had come up to drop a flower upon the grave. As though it was an activity to do on a cool Sunday morning.

 

Shaking his head the figure tried to listen to what was being said. A tall man stood explaining all about the teen's life. If only he knew the whole truth.

 

“Such a young man…” `unless you count Youko's life too…' droned a bored voice.

 

“Such a sweet boy that could never harm a fly…” `unless he was fighting deranged humans, or demons, or wanted something, or was on a heist, or a mission…'chuckled the figure.

 

“Loved by many and will be missed by all…” `...' no smart remarks left the mouth. What could he say, it was true, so true.

 

The line of mourners shrunk as the roses grew. So many different yet beautiful colors radiated from the casket.

 

Eyeing the crowd, the dark figure looked for one figure, one that he desperately wanted to see one more time.

 

Eyes franticly scanned the grounds. `Where is he,' he questioned as desperation slowly took over his search.

 

Finally he found the one he wanted. Smiling the figure allowed for his heart to calm down. Eyes stared at the one he had wanted to see one last time.

 

A dark clad boy walked up to the casket. In his hands he held a blood red rose, the same color as his hair. Silently he stared at the casket before him. At the one who had died in his arms. He had held Kurama feeling his life slowly drain out of him. Closing his crimson eyes he held out his arm, fingers loosening their grip on the rose.

 

Tumbling the rose slowly feel to the bed of flowers below. It would never be alone. A tear fell to the ground below, transforming into a dark stone.

 

The shadowed figure turned, he could no longer take this sight. No longer did he want to hear sad words or see tears.

 

How he hated it when people cried for him. It made him feel so weak and his heritage hated that.

 

Turning the shadowed figure walked off into the horizon. Of where his next destination would be was still unknown, though he knew it was no longer here.

 

A last, quick glance over his shoulder before the boy slowly continued to walk his crimson tresses licking his back. Joyful emerald eyes stared at the trees ahead.

 

Though his destination was to be decided, Kurama could not help but to have high spirits. No longer would he suffer, and he was certain that the two closest to him would not suffer long either. A sly smile played across his face, or at least not anymore.

 

Shiori slowly walked up to the raven haired boy. Her beautiful eyes stared at the trees, as though she hoped to catch sight of something again. Leaning down she asked in a hushed tone, “Did you see that, too?”

 

Hiei nodded. His crimson eyes had seen the same sight too.

 

Smiles adorned the two faces as they stared ahead, hoping to capture one last glance at the one they had loved.