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| "Witness" Reviews/Comments [ 90 ] | | Pages (6): [ « ‹ 1 2 3 4 5 6 › » ] | Reviewed By: tomdj1701 [MediaMiner Member] On: November 09, 2005 06:13 PST
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
Looking forward to see what happens in part 4.
| Reviewed By: The Lone Haranguer On: November 09, 2005 02:28 PST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 8 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
Hmm. I see what you're saying, but I think the question of his consent is less clear. An innate biological difference between male and female mammals is that for the male, sexual arousal is partially voluntary. If there were not some part of him that wanted her and enjoyed it, he would not have been able to get it up for her. I do see Ritsu as being morally culpable here; it was monstrous to manipulate the emotions of a vulnerable teenage boy and damage his self-respect for her own pleasure, but to my mind this does not rise to the level of forcible rape; it seems a difference not only of degree but of kind. Anyway, that aside, Misato is getting very scary here. Yes, she's an alcoholic, and I'm not the first to describe her as a broken-hearted little girl in an adult's body, weak-willed and emotionally needy, short-tempered and touchy, but homicidal? But yes, I too would like to see Ritsuko's motiviations explained, maybe in a confrontation with Misato--one in which Misato just might hear things she doesn't want to ("Come off it! Shinji told me how you used to flirt with him! You wanted him too!"). Ritsu isn't the only one using Shinji, or the only one hurting him, and maybe she is in denial too (does she think Shinji is truly masochistic and gets off on it?). For that matter, if the sexual relationship between Shinji and Ritsuko had been affectionate instead of degrading, it might even have been good for him rather than destructive (does Ritsu think it was good for him?).
| Title: H.P. Metalcraft
Reviewed By: Sideris On: November 08, 2005 17:25 PST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
I loved the angst, the evil, the anger, my friend, I salute you. *Real American Heroes in the background* This is a wonderful darkfic! Simply wonderful in its vileness, quite an accomplishment, why you might even like the darkness I have in store in my next chapter ^_^
| Title: Wow...Again
Reviewed By: nick2951 On: November 08, 2005 14:05 PST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Wow, that was twisted and magnificant. Shinji has truely become something else. I am really looking forward to the next chapter. P.S. Thanks for mentioning my name (Anubis) in your review.
| Reviewed By: Ghost140 [MediaMiner Member] On: November 08, 2005 07:27 PST
Comment/Review:
Hmmm more sex huh well lets see here I dont think its gonna be with Asuka, maybe Misato, hell maybe even Rei.....or does Ritsu get her hands on Shinji again(funny how thats the first thing that came to my mind for this review :P) Any ways this is a great read keep em coming.
| Title: Chapter 03
Reviewed By: WarpWizard [MediaMiner Member] On: November 07, 2005 15:52 PST
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Wow. Great chapter. One thing of special note: I couldn’t feel your authorial presence at all. This is a very good thing. In some fics you can almost feel the author in the background, pulling the strings. Random, though a good writer, has such a strongly distinctive style that I feel him far too much in what he writes. This story of yours in particular feels very “transparent†to me: everything just is what it is, as if it were really happening. Good stuff. Man, you weren’t kidding about the darkness. I’ll just say that I hold out hope that things will get better. I hope Shinji manages to regenerate his legs too, but I’m not too hopefully. Sigh. Wheelchair and eyepatch, here we come. And what you did with Touji. Not killing him, but having all of Shinji’s effort go to waste. You bastard! Good writing though. :) I reread the whole fight scene at the end several times. Twisted stuff. Will Shinji become like what he hates? Given what we’ve seen, quite possibly. I picked up some of your clues (I think) from his “hate listâ€. You’ve actually intrigued me. How rare. And now I’ve probably thrown you off your game for the next chapter. I’d better delete all this praise… *accidently posts it instead* Damn. Error check: sheer | Reviewed By: Lord_Raa [MediaMiner Member] On: November 07, 2005 14:51 PST
Comment/Review:
More praise from your fiend, Lord Raa. I do like this fic, in fact you have inspired me to write my own take on this idea.
| Reviewed By: bucky699 [MediaMiner Member] On: November 02, 2005 03:37 PST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
hey dude this is an incredibly deep story only read chapter 1 but about to read 2 if i have time to before bed jus wanted to let you kno that this is a great fic n that u should keep up the good work, i like how Asuka is slowly being nicer to him n its completly believeable and in character for her to. Hope to see more soon.
| Reviewed By: Ghost140 [MediaMiner Member] On: October 31, 2005 11:55 PST
Comment/Review:
Still pretty good hope you keep it up.
| Reviewed By: Tallwhitemocha On: October 24, 2005 13:27 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
This is one of the few eva fics with depth out there right now. The amount of thought you've put into this story shows in it's superb quality. Keep up the good work.
| Title: ...and, finally...
Reviewed By: The Lone Haranguer On: October 23, 2005 19:33 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 8 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
And, lastly, while it may be only my own idiosyncratic interpretation of certain events in the series, I don't think Ritsu is the only woman here to be looking at Shinji and thinking "oh, he's so cute, I could just eat him up." I perceive a certain degree of sexual tension between Shinji and Misato, particularly in the dinner scene in episode 2, but elsewhere too. Could some of the Major's insane, over-the-top, foaming-at-the-mouth rage at her former best friend be rooted in jealousy (not only sexual jealousy, but also because Ritsu got Shinji to open up to her), even displaced guilt for having had naughty thoughts about Shinji herself? And why is Asuka so hell-bent on forcing Shinji to call it "rape?" Asuka has damaged Shinji pretty badly herself over the course of the series; look at Shinji in episode 3, when he's openly suicidal, then episode 7, when Misato has gently coaxed him out of his shell to the point where he can comfortably and playfully banter with her over breakfast, then see Asuka slowly crush his spirit, and notice that he's suicidal again even before the 13th Angel, due mostly to Asuka's constant bullying and abuse. Does the great Asuka Langley Soryuu not want to believe that her favorite domestic slave, emotional tampon, chew-toy, and punching bag would willingly have sex with anyone but her? In this story, Shinji doesn't want to believe that Ritsu is just using him. Yes, he's in denial. But he's not the only one. Asuka and Misato are in denial too.
| Title: (continued)
Reviewed By: The Lone Haranguer On: October 23, 2005 19:09 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 8 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
(uh, continued). Hmm. Mediaminer ate all my nice whitespace. That had been nicely formatted, too. Anyway, to continue, I would like to see some exploration of Ritsu's motivations here (is it "she's sick in the head and she likes to fuck children" or "Shinji is an invincible warrior but also very obedient and that turns her on" or even "Gendo pissed her off by fucking Rei?") and also the ramifications of something that seems potentially significant to me: Shinji never resists Ritsu, or at least not much, and doesn't seem to tell her "no." That makes it consensual kinky sex, not rape. Stipulated, it's a screwy dysfunctional relationship and it's really, really bad for him. Stipulated, she seems to be kinky in ways that he doesn't seem to enjoy (then again, he does cum for her, doesn't he?). This doesn't look like rape to me. Ritsu is morally culpable for using him this way, for doing things to him that are harmful to his mental health and self-respect in order to satiate her own perverse desires, but is it rape? And is it any more damaging to him than sticking him in the cockpit and sending him out to fight Angels? Yes, Shinji is too young for weird BDSM, maybe too young for sex at all. But he's also too young to go to war. Has Ritsu hurt him any more than Misato and Gendo already have? Granted, Shinji has to fight to save the world, whereas Ritsu is only doing this to him because she gets off on it, but still, even with this, if she's a monster, she's not the only one.
| Title: Snuh?
Reviewed By: The Lone Haranguer On: October 22, 2005 17:40 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 8 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
I've been reading the second chapter and am intrigued. I thought about it most of the day at work today. This doesn't look quite like rape, either, except in the statutory sense. Freaky BDSM, yes, and Shinji seems unhappy with Ritsu's desire to degrade him, but it still looks consensual. But that's unimportant. I am trying to imagine Ritsu's motivations here; in canon, she likes powerful men. Might she here be drawn to Shinji, the child soldier who holds the very reins of the world in his trembling hands? I find myself writing a scene in my head wherein Misato confronts Ritsu--sadly, not angrily, and demands to know why, and Ritsu is defiant. Something like: Ritsu: "You're just jealous that I beat you to him! You wanted him too. Don't deny it." Misato: "You're just using him for your own sick gratification! Even if I did sometimes think of him like that, I know he's too young!" Ritsu: "Yes, I used him. I fucked him. We're all using him--for the war, for a cook and maid. We're all fucking Shinji. At least when I fuck him, I let him cum." Misato: "That's not fair! He was innocent!" Ritsu: "You're the one who stole his innocence. What do you think you're protecting him from? You made him fight, he wades in gore for you, any day he could die for you! Do you think he's Sir Lancelot, who had the strength of ten men because he was pure and chaste? Grow up! You'll send him to fight and bleed and die, but you won't suck his dick? And you call ME a bitch?"
| Reviewed By: Lord_Raa [MediaMiner Member] On: October 22, 2005 17:00 PDT
Comment/Review:
Another quality chapter. I look forward to being shocked, apalled and disturbed when I read part three.
| Title: Wow
Reviewed By: Nick2951 On: October 22, 2005 09:38 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Good update, but I was expecting a little more. But still it was good. I am looking forward to seeing the aftermath of the 13th Angel incident.
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