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| "The Kyuubi's Gift" Reviews/Comments [ 8 ] | Reviewed By: DarkAngel37 [MediaMiner Member] On: July 07, 2007 21:03 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! love it hope u make the other ch soon i want 2 read them pz i just LUV IT especially cuz its a naruto and sakura one hahaha
| Reviewed By: chidorigrl12 On: July 06, 2007 15:31 CDT
Comment/Review:
AWESOME!!! I LOVE IT!!!
| Reviewed By: Wing Guardian [MediaMiner Member] On: April 08, 2007 01:16 CDT
Comment/Review:
Awesome story!! I definitely like the spin on how Naruto changes the lives of those in his village! Keep it up!!
| Title: Not bad for a first fanfic
Reviewed By: FFXInuyasha1 [MediaMiner Member] On: April 06, 2007 09:37 CDT
Comment/Review:
I re-read the story and I have to say, I'm still quite impressed with the detail in this fanfic. Although there were times where I saw punctuation that stopped by train of thought, (I'm no saint when it comes to punctuation either) but anything else I saw no problems in the story that made it any more fifficult to read. I reccomend you enter in the contest, who knows? You may be able to win something.
| Reviewed By: zigyy553 [MediaMiner Member] On: April 05, 2007 22:34 CDT
Comment/Review:
One more thing. Will the Malice Chakra be realesed by Evil Naru-teme? If so I get first punch!
| Reviewed By: zigyy553 [MediaMiner Member] On: April 05, 2007 22:31 CDT
Comment/Review:
I TOTALLY AGREE WITH GRAYPHEONIX!YOU SELF CENTERED DONKEY RAPING WHORE! You left us on 1 hell of a cliffhanger! *starts crying rivers* I want an other chapter you bastard! You'd best update this weekend or...I'LL RIP OFF YOUR HEAD, PUT IT ON A PIKE, AND STICK IT IN SOMEBODY'S YARD! OR UP YOUR ASS! Which ever is more humiliating! I'm also wondering if your going to save Saru-kun. He acts just like my grandpa did. Another thing, Are you going to include the original Tsunade arc with a few alterations, like taking Sakura with Naru-kun? And what happened to Jiriaya? I mean come on! We absolutely need the Pervert King getting whammed in the face by Tsu-baa! And why hasn't the Kohna council acted up? I mean seriously, wouldn't they object to having Naru-kun being adopted into the Uchiha clan? Any ways, i give this 2 thumbs up! Can you just add a BIT more length to the chapters? I'm a long Fanfic chapter kind of guy. Also, thanx for translating the english to japanese. It makes it sound 3 hells of a lot cooler. But, GrayPheonix is right. If you keep using up all of these ideas of yours, you might stop the fic, which believe me I DO NOT want that to happen. I've fics stop just because the author ran out of ideas. Now that my friend, is a pitiful way for a fic to stop. Writer's block, murder, killed, etc. are all understand able, but running out of ideas!? That's just plain sad! I'm really hoping you'll update this over easter break! Hell, Screw checking the site every 5 minutes! I'll just fav this. That's pretty much all I have to say. Ja!-zigyy553
| Title: Love it
Reviewed By: FFXInuyasha1 [MediaMiner Member] On: April 05, 2007 19:16 CDT
Comment/Review:
Can't find anything wrong with the story it's perfect. I'll add this to my favorites. Thank you for keeping me entertained for Spring Break.
| Reviewed By: GrayPheonix [MediaMiner Member] On: April 05, 2007 08:40 CDT
Comment/Review:
DAMN YOU YOU POORLY WRITING SON OF A BITCH, YOU LEFT THIS AT A REALLY GOOD PART!!!! Okay, that last part was uncalled for, but here's the thing. YOu have awesome ideas (and I mean REALLY awesome ideas) but you suck at writing them. Long and short of it, "show, do not tell" is the long standing rule on writing. Show the details of what's going on, not what you are saying is going on. I will say this, your style of writing needs substantial work. However, you are creative (especially inside the anime, I am impressed by how you created and used techniques and training in here, as well as the MANY relationships) not to mention quite adept at showing much, and foreshadowing a bit more. I am impressed with that. Still, you did make Naruto and Sakura a bit too friendly after getting to the tower, when he had been so angsty up until this point. Even with the Malice Chakra sealed, the other Naruto was still in there, and could color his actions by merely existing. That's something to worry about right there. One last point. Are you going to have Naruto do something to save Sarutobei, or is he gonna die in this story? Not to mention, what about everyone's most loved/hated son of a bitch, Sasuke? WHat are you gonna do about his lust for power? Even if he doesn't have the curse seal, what's he gonna do to get more during the training period between stages of the exam? Not to mention, what about Sakura? Then of course, the question arises, what's gonna happen with Jiraiya? Or are you gonna have Naruto look for Tsuande during the training month? Neh, all good questions. Write the next chapter at your leisure (and at a better caliber than these last few have been!) and show some of those answers then. Still, I like the long chapter format, it is fitting. Alright, that's about it. This is a good fic, but liek I said, work on th equality of your writing. The creativity is awesome as is, keep adding in new stuff like this, and you might run out of ideas eventually. Well,whatever, I gotta read for class, so, later. Note: if' you're looking for a Beta, or just someone to talk to, check out my contact info on my profile, ok? Later
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