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| "Final Battle- Good Vrs. Evil Part 1- New Friends" Reviews/Comments [ 3 ] | Reviewed By: Ichigohime [MediaMiner Member] On: June 02, 2008 12:45 CDT
Comment/Review:
whoo hoo! XDD I see you've taken some of my suggestions into consideration! XD reminds me of the days when I first started writing actually. I had someone offer suggestions to me and it seemed from there my writing improved. (none is posted on here. I don't write too much anymore, due to lack of time. I hope to start again soon though... XD) What helped me though was paying attention to some of my favorite authors and thier writing styles. I didn't exactly copy them, but used it to create my own style. And that also helped better my grammar and spelling errors. It also helps to have someone look over your work before you post it, because they may catch mistakes you miss! Ha. I made this a long one! I hope this encourages you and that you keep writing!
| Reviewed By: Ichigohime [MediaMiner Member] On: May 30, 2008 09:41 CDT
Comment/Review:
Not a bad chapter. Once again, small errors. I do have to say though, that whenever a new person speaks that is a new paragraph. That makes the chapter longer and easier to read. You're suppose to start a new paraghraph every time a new person is speaking.
| Reviewed By: Ichigohime [MediaMiner Member] On: May 30, 2008 09:32 CDT
Comment/Review:
I did notice a feel spelling errors. I think instead of Youkie, you meant Youkai, which means demon. As for the first chapter I would try to slow things down a bit, maybe make things longer. Check for small gramatical errors. But over all it wasn't too bad. XD
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