Title: Good but needs work
Reviewed By: Chargos24 [MediaMiner Member] On: September 28, 2007 10:58 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 1 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 8 of 10
Overall Rating: 7 of 10 Comment/Review:
The biggest piece of advice I can think to give you in regards to your story is to watch the grammer. The plot is very well thought out in my opinion, as well as the characters having a life of their own. The grammer on the other hand detracts from the story somewhat; not so much that it cannot be read, but enough that it makes it less enjoyable. I do not know if English is your first or second language, but the way the story is written it seems like it is your second. I apologize if this is not the case and I have offended you. I would suggest you find someone to beta read your story before you post it, possibly someone that is majoring in English or is just very well versed in its mechanics. Other than that, the story is very good and I cannot wait to read more of it.
|
