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| "Of Ryujin Blood" Reviews/Comments [ 16 ] | | Pages (2): [ 1 2 > » ] | Reviewed By: CPV_Phantoms_CTFA On: April 09, 2004 04:03 CDT
Comment/Review:
^^ Before you all chop me into pieces, I want to say I'm amused to no end. No, I am not here to flame, but I am not here to praise either. Yet, I am completely agreeing with Nightshade-san in one thing; Iczer6-san, I understand you don't like the fic, but I must say your review was, how to say... evil... If you don't like the fic, then don't read it, you don't have to go yell the author that she's a bitch or whatever. Even though she was quite disrespectful, that doesn't mean you have to do as she did; it's immature. ^^ Now, I'm sure you'll chop me into pieces but I just had to say it 'cause I understand what it's like to be insulted.(and it's not a nice feeling) Next time, If you are trying to say that you don't like the fic say it kindly, and if you can then point out what you don't like so you can help the author. Because I don't think you would like someone to come and yell at you that your fic sucks so you can go kill yourself or insult you. ^^ Er... Gomen if I offended you, I don't mean to offend, I just wanted to tell that with sincerity. It's not nice when they do that. Other than that, I think everyone has their own points of view, and I have to agree with a few points that have been already mentioned. However I believe, and I think other people do to, we are not trying to make you stop writting, but to help you to Improve your writting. We are not doing this to offend you or feel superior to you, but to help you, and When someone helps you(or tries to), Nightshade-san, even if it proves you are wrong and it displeases you, You should accept that help 'cause it could be important. ^^ Try reading what all this people have pointed out, try reflecting it, try not thinking that they are criticizing your work in a bad manner, but that they are trying to help you, and then work what has just been said. You'll see that you'll improve. *huggs* Now, I must hide before everyone jumps on me. ^^ Keep it up, Nightshade-san, don't give up. We all make mistakes; it helps us to grow. Try hard next time with what they have all pointed out, and you will see the changes. *waves merrily and grins* JA NE!(I'm sorry if I have bad Grammar but English is not my mother language) *jumps into the toilet and flushes, dissapearing* -AzurePhantom(Boogie)
| Title: BAKA - PRIDE!!~!~!~!~!~!~!
Reviewed By: Tama-chan and Menchi [MediaMiner Member] On: November 11, 2003 11:38 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 1 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 4 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 1 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 1 of 10
Overall Rating: 2 of 10 Comment/Review:
Baka! The thing that suxz is there is nothing! Just talking and no details. And I dun think anoyone could create a ladder large enough for you to get over your high and mighty self! Baka out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PS. ALL HAIL ILPALLAZO!!!!!!! Muraki is da pimp!!!!!!!! Seishirou is damn fine!!! Akio will now take you to the end of the world!!!!
| Reviewed By: Lady Nightshade [MediaMiner Member] On: August 13, 2003 18:48 CDT
Comment/Review:
Muraki is an Evil Chicken! | Reviewed By: Starza [MediaMiner Member] On: August 10, 2003 23:29 CDT
Comment/Review:
Again, I do this, asking myself why. O_O;;
-It wasn't just the fact that you called us 'dudes', but it was the overall reply and tone taken to us that was offending. You don't call a stranger 'dude' unless you're being rude, especially when it comes online. We have names. ~_^
-It would be nice if you kept what readers had in mind, but it doesn't look like you're really considering what we've pointed out. As I haven't seen anything that people recommended to you besides the beta reader. *sighs*
-The problem with the beta reader is YOUR problem and yours alone, not mine, not the readers, not the reviewers or anyone else's. If after your beta reader has read your fic and there are still errors, then it's high time you got another beta reader or get another to look it over.
I know that beta readers can't catch every mistake in their fics, but it doesn't look like in this story that the beta did a good job, grammar wise and writing composition. You want a beta reader to point out improper grammar and writing composition along with spelling.
The problem falls upon your shoulders after, as even after my stories are beta, I give them 2-3 more readings before being posted up and if someone finds a mistake, I go and correct it.
The problem isn't really much as spelling now, but grammar and flow. Why would you want to post a story up that is riddled with grammar and writing composition problems???? Authors need to be concerned about quality in their works, not how fast they can pump out chapters.
-Muraki going after the girl is cliche, her having empathy is cliche, her being raped by Muraki so that she can 'bond' with Hisoka is cliche, how many TIMES do people have to say this?! *Bangs head against the wall* You SAY you want to be original, yet, you're using ideas that have been DONE to the DEATH already and in a very poor manner. Even Imbrii pointed out in her review where you're being unoriginal.
I don't understand how you can say you want to be original, and yet... you're writing on something that no one really enjoys and something that has been done before. Really, something like this should be kept between you and a few friends or at LEAST taken back down, a re-write done, and posted back up. | Reviewed By: Lady Nightshade [MediaMiner Member] On: August 10, 2003 21:49 CDT
Comment/Review:
Look if I sounded rude I am sorry because I did not mean to also I call everyone dude all the time. I am still writting this story and I never said I would use them I said I would consider them. I already apolgiced for the mistake about the eyes. I already have one she said if u still had a problem with it then u could email her and talk to her about it. I am also using word. Muraki is only after her because he thinks he can get this power from her. The only ones that have pointed them out are u and wolf everyone else just complains about it. Like I said I am trying to make this more orginal and once again I am sorry if this came off rude since I have no intention for it to be rude. | Reviewed By: Starza [MediaMiner Member] On: August 09, 2003 10:10 CDT
Comment/Review:
Why people think you're treating us impolitely:
1. Calling me and wolfpilot06 'dudes' when we are, in fact, both females.
2. The tone you gave to us in your review was, to be honest, disrespectful, and gives the impression of a 'superiority' complex.
3. We gave suggestions and feedback, like FF.net suggests. It was basically 'ignored' and almost every kind of excuse was thrown back at us.
4. You comment to wolfpilot06 was flat out rude. "so in your mind it is in my mind it ain’t." If you read her review fully, you would've noticed that she was agreeing with ME, as I wrote the cliches in your fic and she felt she would only be repeating herself.
5. Muraki's eyes are gray and blue. I pointed this out to you in a private e-mail, I could even provide a Screenshot if you wished, and you basically went on to prove me wrong and tell me otherwise.
There's just... no excuse for spelling and grammar mistakes. NONE! Get a beta reader if you can't find them all. Download a basic spell checker from google if you don't have one. If after your beta reader looks over your story and you still have mistakes, then get a friend to look it over. There honestly is no excuse for bad spelling or grammar in fics.
This is probably why the review above felt you were coming off rude. I'll admit, some of the reviews here are FAR from useful and hypocritical, but some of the reviews people have given you here and FF.net ARE useful. I would suggest you read Imbrii's review in detail.
A few more suggestions: I know you can make Tsuzuki and Hisoka's relationship different. In a fic series I'm working on, Tsuzuki and Hisoka are just friends (But I pair up Hisoka with Hijiri. ^_^), but you have to remember something.
Hisoka doesn't trust people around him and has a hard time trusting people. The only person he trusts even partly is Tsuzuki. He's not going to open up to anyone right away, especially not to some stranger.
Cliches that I mentioned before: Hisoka falling in love with a female, said female has empathy, said female attracts the eyes of Muraki (No, Muraki doesn't 'go after everybody'. He only shows interest in TSUZUKI, the only reason he goes after Hisoka in the anime is because Hisoka is one of Tsuzuki's weak points), said female has a similiar past with Hisoka...
You can pair Hisoka up with someone who's opposite to his personality. If you want, you can read Mini Concert and Twin Hearts to get an idea about it, even though it's Shounen-ai in material.
Cliches mixed in with less-than-average spelling and grammar is not a turn on to readers in the fandom. We're all looking for different things, we all like new ideas. This story doesn't contain any. People have pointed them constantly out to you, yet, you ignore them. ~_~ ALWAYS keep your readers in mind with your story.
That's all I'm going to say, as I feel I'm just repeating myself for the third time now. | Reviewed By: how bad On: August 02, 2003 22:09 CDT
Comment/Review:
How can I treat them bad if I am asking them to leave any sort of tips for how i can make it better? Also being called an uppity bitch and being told to go kill myself is not exactly my idea of a something that should be taken politely. | Reviewed By: Meri On: July 29, 2003 03:01 CDT
Comment/Review:
I'm not even bothering to read this fic. Not because of the negative reviews, but because of your horrible treatment of reviewers on fanficion.net and here. You can write what you want to write, but they can say whatever they feel like about it. Accept it, move on. | Reviewed By: Ms.Moodkiller On: July 28, 2003 03:14 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 2 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 1 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 2 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 1 of 10
Overall Rating: 1 of 10 Comment/Review:
I am not going to praise this fic. It does not deserve any kind of encouragement. I can't say that writing is atrocious, I've seen much worse. This fic may be categorized as ‘just plain bad'.
IMHO, the best way to discourage this writer from publishing further installations of this unpalatable reading material would be to show this ‘opus’ to her English teacher or her parents. I am sure they will not be pleased. | Reviewed By: Icz On: July 10, 2003 21:49 CDT
Comment/Review:
Folks, the word is GRAMMAR.
Icz | Reviewed By: Imbrii On: July 06, 2003 16:02 CDT
Comment/Review:
The Goddess Shinigami have their own fic reviewed by me, which I did at an earlier date. I didn't link it to them as I was more caustic and didn't want them feeling the need to lash back.
Grammer is part of writing. Don't like grammer? Don't write. A beta is not responsible for all errors, the author is. If the beta fails to catch it, then it's still the author's writing, and her own responsibility. Don't blame others for your own problems.
Please don't make excuses for people, you aren't helping them become less "eccentric" by doing so They aren't your responsibility.
I will say now that the review is not a flame, and any nasty responses will be deleted or I'll just dis-allow comments. I'm the only one in the community with this opinion, don't pull others in if you're angry at me. Contact me personally if you wish. http://www.livejournal.com/community/canonfodder | Reviewed By: Imbrii On: July 06, 2003 14:08 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 5 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 3 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 2 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 1 of 10
Overall Rating: 5 of 10 Comment/Review:
This is a story that needs heaps of work. The formatting, grammer, spelling, characterization, and plot all need improvement. I plan on making a longer, formal review of this fic at an LJ community, and I'll leave a link when I'm done. I'll be caustic, but I'm being honest. I'm doing this so you can improve your writing, not for the sake of insulting you. I'll be back. | Reviewed By: Lady Nightshade [MediaMiner Member] On: June 25, 2003 06:38 CDT
Comment/Review:
Why should I remove something I like writting just because you don't? Besides calling me a bitch and telling me to go kill myself is not a good way to get me to do something | Reviewed By: Iczer6 [MediaMiner Member] On: June 24, 2003 23:54 CDT
Comment/Review:
You're an idiot, please remove this garbage from the net and then kindly go kill yourself for writing such horrid filth you uppity, no-nothing little bitch. | Reviewed By: Lady Nightshade [MediaMiner Member] On: June 23, 2003 14:04 CDT
Comment/Review:
What part of I want to try something different didn't you understand? Also if you are going to flame me make sure you at least a grammerily correct please. | | Pages (2): [ 1 2 > » ] |
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