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| "Emerald Tears" Reviews/Comments [ 2 ] | Reviewed By: Era Malum On: September 08, 2003 19:04 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I like your story. ^_^ I love it. I hope you continue soon.^_~ | Reviewed By: Amy On: August 20, 2003 20:57 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 6 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 7 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 8 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
Hi, I'm new here and you are the first fanfiction that I have ever reviewed. I like your fanfiction but there are some things that made me wonder. I won't be rude, but I'll be honest it was kind of puzzling when Squall was thinking when you wrote Squall thought. Also, your sentence structure has several commas and it seemed to me that it slowed everything down and made it intricate to understand. If your going to use complex sentences use a semicolon or just a comma or two. For your short sentences they were just too short. Add something to give it more essence. Try not to use that in every line but use a variety of short and complex sentences so you can get your point through to your audience. Anyway, it was pretty good and I hope you'll continue it. |
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