Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Everbody Breaks ❯ Someone Else's Strength ( Chapter 13 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Someone Else's Strength

By Kai

Disclaimer: Nope, I don't own Gundam Wing - and trust me - the boys are VERY thankful for that fact.
Ratings: NC-17 (sexual content and language) but not in this part, the rating is staying though because it applies to most of the story.
Warnings: Yaoi, 1x2x5x3x4 but not in this part... next part, maybe...
Special Thanks To Z for taking on the horrible and terrifying job of betaing for me. To think she was actually HAPPY to have the job.
Summary: Targeted... What to do when your own strength fails...?

Someone Else's Strength
By Kai

My head was buzzing almost painfully as I rode in the elevator to the sixth floor. I would have taken the stairs for extra exercise, but I was suddenly very tired in a way that wasn't due to lack of sleep. I was tired of people getting hurt because of me, tired of so much responsibility, and tired of never being able to have something of my own because my wants and desires always had to come last. I was also a bit tired of being a target.

So even though what Une had said was perfectly logical, I was strongly hoping that Mari - Sally's assistant and second in charge of the Forensics Labs - would show me that Une's theory was wrong. Unfortunately, Une had an annoying habit of being right concerning such things. If she was right what would that mean exactly? Who would want me dead? The possibilities were endless. Why would someone want me dead? Again, the possibilities were endless. If Une was right, the situation would be even more difficult to sort out than if someone had been someone targeting the Preventers. That would mean that any clues we had would only come from the forensic evidence of the bomb fragments or from the very slight possibility of something being discovered by Agents Whitticker, Mendoza or Agent Sebastian. Not very reassuring. If that didn't work, what was left... denying the bomber what he wanted. What did he want? He wanted one of two things: Preventers in chaos or me dead. What was preventing both of those desires? Me; because I was still alive. Something he'd undoubtedly find out soon, if he didn't already know. This would make me and anyone near me a target. Shit...

I stepped out of the elevator and leaned against the wall as the door closed next to me. I'd been thinking of not letting the others know about Une's theory even if the evidence did support it. However, if I was going to be a target, and I had no doubts I would be - no matter the reason, I would have to tell the others. Even if I didn't tell them they would still be around me as often as they could putting their lives in danger. At least if I told them they'd have a better chance of staying alive or keeping safe because they'd be fully aware of the situation. The only other thing I could do would be to push them away...

The thought alone was enough for me to go from feeling tired to exhaustion so strong that my legs were shaking just with the effort of standing upright. No, that just wasn't an option. Now that they were mine, I couldn't lose them. Losing one of them or two of them would cripple me, but if I pushed all of them away it would destroy me. I was strong, but even Superman had Kryptonite and Superman was something I could never claim to be.

I forced myself to take a few slow deep breaths and somehow found the strength to move down the hall to the Labs' reception desk. As luck would have it, Mari was at the desk dropping off files when I got there. In other circumstances I would have just called her Mari, it's what she'd insisted I call her the first time Sally had dragged me to her office because she'd 'forgotten something' - I think it had actually been Sally's attempt at matchmaking, but I was here for business this time and I had a feeling she'd understand that. "Miss Sahibra."

She nodded at me and smiled, though it was tired and sad smile. She and Sally were good friends and this whole situation was hard on her as well. "Commander Chang. Here about the forensic reports?"

"Yes, are they ready?"

She brushed dark bangs out of her eyes. "They're in my office, if you'll just follow me..."

Interesting... she obviously wanted to talk to me or she would have just had me wait at the reception desk but she didn't actually come out and ask, which would have been both easier and simpler. I could have just been reading too much into it, but the look she'd given me led me to believe otherwise. Quietly I followed her down another hallway and into an office located at the end. When she shut the door behind us and turned to face me with an unhappy and worried expression I merely raised an eyebrow in question and waited.

Sighing, she moved behind the desk and dropped into the chair. "I have quite a bit to tell you and you aren't going to like most of it. I know you can read it in the report I wanted to tell it to you in person. You might want to sit down."

I chose to heed her words and sat down. "What do you wish to tell me?"

She picked up a file and handed it to me before she picked up a pen and began to play with it by twirling it around her fingers. It was a nervous gesture I had never seen her exhibit before. "There wasn't much left of the bomb when we got to it, but we marked the radius of the blast and concluded that the bomb was placed at the foot of the table on the left hand side. True that is a bit strange, but that isn't the reason why I wished to talk with you. The bomb was made using a new explosive material, a compound that smells similar to burnt toast. This explosive, nextrix, was discovered by a team of Preventers during an infiltration a month ago. The creator of it was so secretive and suspicious that he never disclosed it's recipe with anyone and all of it was confiscated by Preventers. The man who created it, Nicholai Mikailau, has been in isolation at a secure facility since his trail. It's not likely that the recipe would have been passed onto someone else with so few opportunities. So I did some checking... and I discovered that four pounds have gone missing from the evidence locker it was stored in."

I leaned forward slightly, "The evidence lockers have limited access and strict supervision. To get into the locker with dangerous materials where the confiscated nextrix would have been place would have been more heavily supervised. You'd have to be an agent with fairly high clearance to get in there and even if you managed to do that you wouldn't be able to smuggle anything out on your own. You'd need help."

She nodded stiffly, eyes never leaving me. "That's what I thought, too."

When I'd told Agent Sebastian to go through everyone's records to see who may have been the inside man, I'd never considered that the person would be an agent, let alone a high-ranking one, and I'd didn't once think that it would be more than one person. Still, it was possible that the two incidents were related by the nextrix and nothing else. Some Preventers could have been corrupted by circumstance into stealing from the evidence locker and selling what they took for extra money. Who they sold it to may have been the actual ones behind the bombing. Though Mari confirmed what Une, had suggested it didn't discount the possibility of the bomb being meant to take out the Senior Preventers, either. "Have you reported your findings to anyone else?"

"Not yet. I promised Agent Mendoza that I would have the results ready for her at eleven."

"Then I'm going to ask you to keep the findings concerning the nextrix quiet for a little while longer. Tell Agent Mendoza that you need a few more days to process the compound used to construct the bomb. Tell her that it's far more difficult to analyze than you had originally thought."

She cocked her head to the side, the pen stilling in her hands. "I think I have an idea why you're asking me to do that, but if you could tell me I think it would be best."

She deserved to know just what she'd accidentally gotten herself into. "If the people behind this think that you made the connection to nextrix, your life would be in danger but if they think that you haven't had any luck in tracing or identifying it yet and that you might have a chance to identify it later, they may decide to try to reclaim the evidence before it can incriminate them."

She slumped back into her chair, eyes wide. "A trap; you want to set a trap for them. But you can't do that on your own and I'm not even close to being field-rated."

"Don't worry; I don't plan on doing this alone. I already know of four others I can get help from concerning this, but what I need to know is if I can trust you to keep this between us and withhold it from Mendoza. If you need me to I can make it a direct order..."

"No need Wufei. After what those guys did to Sally, I can sit on this for a day or so if it gives you a better chance of catching them. You have my word and further more, if there's anything I can do to help you with this - all you have to do is ask."

I got up and bowed to her. "I'll take this file if you can fix another for Agent Mendoza."

"Of course." She stood and walked me to the door, catching my arm before I could open it. "And Wufei, I want the ones responsible to pay for this as much as the next person but... not at the cost of your life. You're a good man, anyone can see that, and besides there are far too few of you in this world as it is. If you can't stay alive for yourself, do it for Sally. She loves you and it would rip her apart if she woke up to find you gone from her life."

While I was still gaping at her she shoved me out the door, saying something about needing to catch up on the extra paperwork I just gave her. Before I turned to walk down the hall I carefully slid the file into the false lining of my coat. I didn't want anyone finding out about it until I chose. I was sure to bid farewell to the receptionist as I went back to the elevators, a part of me wondering why things were never easy. Why couldn't the culprits wear signs saying 'bad guy' and save me a few headaches? Stepping into the elevator I found myself grinning as the doors slid shut. If I asked Duo that question he'd just shrug and ask me where would the fun be in that. I didn't like innocent people being hurt or put in danger, but I had to admit that he had a point to that. It was the challenges in life that made it interesting.

*****************************

I had just exited the hospital and had started on my way back to the HQ when my phone rang. A quick glance at my watch showed me it was a little after ten. "Chang here."

"Hey Wu, didja miss us?" I forgot to breathe. "Wu?"

"I'm here Duo. Your call just surprised me that's all. I wasn't expecting to hear from you until you'd arrived on Earth."

He chuckled and I felt my body tighten and my heart speed up at the sound. "We are on Earth, Wu. What can I say? I really outdid myself this time. Personal new record!"

I felt a grin tugging at my lips and gave into it as I crossed the street and started walking past the hospital parking lot. "Eric was going to meet you at the shuttle port at 11. Do you think you can get a ride to HQ on your own?"

"Sure, no problem..."

That's when I felt my stomach clench painfully and the hair on the back of my neck stand on end. Danger; I was in danger. My eyes darted up and to the right and I saw a car slowing down on the street, black - no markings, windows tinted and rolled down slightly. I caught sight of a gun muzzle and vaulted over the fence of the car park. I managed to dive behind a car and draw my gun just as they opened fire. Automatic fire, not single shot. Glass shattered around me and I caught the sent of gasoline before I was crab-walking as fast as I could away from the car and the smell of gas to a new shelter. I was aware of squealing tires just before the gas ignited from a stray bullet and the car exploded.

I'd managed to get far enough away that I avoided serious injury but not far enough away to avoid being knocked off my feet. Once sheltered, I took stock of my surroundings only to find that the car was gone and that sirens had erupted in the distance.

"Wufei!"

Blankly I glanced down at my left hand to find that I'd somehow managed to hang onto my phone through the whole mess. I wasn't sure if that was a blessing or a curse as I brought it close to my ear but not in direct contact. If I had, my eardrum would have burst from the frantic shouting on the other end. It wasn't just Duo's voice I heard either. Taking a deep breath I brought the mouthpiece to my lips and yelled. "Duo! Shut up!" Blessed silence, another breath and I eased the phone to my ear. "I'm fine."

I was a little surprised when it was Quatre's voice that came over the line - had they had me on speaker? "What happened Wufei?"

What happened? That was a good question and I wasn't sure of the answer, but I could explain what I knew. Not much but at least it was something. "I'd just finished visiting the others at the hospital and checking in at Forensics. You called me moments after I'd started walking back to HQ when... an indescript car pulled up near me and opened fire. I dove behind a car in the hospital carpark that exploded shortly after I moved to another vehicle for cover. I'm not injured except for a few bruises and minor shrapnel wounds." None of which I'd noticed until I'd mentioned them and now they were being annoying and starting to sting.

Heero's voice; they definitely had to be on speaker.... "The gunmen?"

"Got away, I didn't see them or get the license plate. Look, I have to let you go. I need to call Eric and..."

"NO!" I had to pull the phone away from my ear as the four voices combined on that one word. Duo was the only one of them prone to being loud so I was startled that the others had as well. Worse yet, the word sounded panicked. They were worried...?

"Okay. I won't hang up, but Preventers Agents will be here soon and I'm not going to be able to talk when they arrive."

"That's fine, just stay on the line until they get there and we'll meet you at the HQ as soon as we can." That was Trowa, voice soft but a little rough - as if he wasn't too happy about not being at my side at this exact moment.

"Alright." I'd put my gun back in it's holster and had begun moving back towards the sidewalk, thankful I was dressed in my Preventers' uniform. It would save a great deal of hassle when the Agents arrived. I wasn't sure if they'd tried to kill me because of who I was or because I was Acting Commander of Preventers, but I now knew for certain that I was a target. Despite that I felt relief. I was relieved that the others were finally here even though I knew without a doubt that their lives would be in danger. My guilt and uncertainty weren't strong enough to offset the relief. I felt tears burning my eyes and my throat close up. Gods I was a mess. "I - I'm glad you're here." I wanted to say more, but I couldn't trust my voice or myself to do that without falling apart. I needed to figure everything out and put an end to it soon because I was pretty sure that I wouldn't be able to last much longer.

Preventer squad cars, a couple of fire engines, and a couple of unmarked cars showed up within seconds of each other and I was thankful to find a couple of familiar faces : Agent Whitticker and Agent Jordan.

"We'll be with you soon Wufei. Things will be alright." I smiled at that. Duo sounded too serious, but I was almost thankful for that.

"The Agents are here. I need to go. See you at HQ?" It came out a question and I sounded a little too shaky for my own good - not because of being shot at or being near an exploding car but because of the rest. I knew how to deal with being shot at or caught near explosions, it was emotions, needs and desires that made me doubt my footing.

"You'll see us there." Heero; firm - no room for doubts.

I hung up the phone and pulled myself together as Agent Whitticker and Agent Jordan came up to me. Time for damage control and professionalism.

********************

I gave my statement and Agent Whitticker personally escorted me back to the HQ, before picking up Agent Mendoza to go back to the crime scene. I went to my office to find a series of reports on my desk, but before I jumped into them I called Eric to let him know about the change of plan concerning the other pilots and that he should just meet all of us at Headquarters at 11. I didn't bother telling him about the attempt on my life. He would fine out about it soon enough.

I left word at the front desk to let the others through to my office when they arrived and then threw myself into the reports, content to lose myself in them for as long as I could.

*****************************

The next thing I knew I was blinking up at my door and the four people who'd just walked into my office - the door was closed firmly behind them. My mind was blank as I looked at them, and it stayed that way as Trowa closed the blinds over all the windows. It was pleasantly blank up until Duo moved close enough to get a closer look at me. When he did he hissed. "You're bleeding."

I looked at him and then followed his gaze to my arm. I'd taken my coat off when I had sat down and the grey sleeve of my shirt had a saucer-sized blood spot on it, spread around a fairly deep gash. I'd forgotten about the shrapnel damage again. Of course, since he'd brought it to my attention my back started tingling painfully. I looked at him - mind not as blank but not quite working like it should either. "I forgot to have them looked at."

Suddenly I had an urge to throw myself at him, but even as I felt that I noticed Duo's new uniform - as I recalled, Une had sent them uniforms with the contracts - and something hit me like a freight train. Something I'd somehow managed to forget. Something very important. "Fraternization rules." My voice sounded hollow. They were here but there was no way I could touch them.

Quatre was by my side in a second, hands cupping my chin gently as he turned my head so that I had to look at him. "I took care of it already. Two of the board members had to sign a document of consent with a Psychologist's assessment. My sister Iria isn't just a physician, she's a physiologist as well. She was more than willing to do it, though she would like to do some tests and talk with you at a later date. She already did with the rest of us for WEI and she was pretty sure you would have gotten similar results. She'll be here in a couple of days. Relena was more than happy to sign the papers. You may not believe this but Catalonia was placed on the board by her maternal grandmother about five months ago, and when Relena asked Dorothy to sign the documents with her, she didn't hesitate. So it's fine, the four of you have special dispensation."

I couldn't look away from his light blue eyes. Didn't even want to. "It's okay?"

He nodded and I just fell forward into him shaking. He pulled me from my chair and into his lap on the floor. The others joined us there shortly after Heero locked the door. I found myself pulling them around me so that they were pressed around me from all sides. Guilt, pain, anger, relief, hope and love shifted through me so fast that I found it hard to breathe. I needed and wanted them so badly that it hurt. Worse, I knew that no matter how hard I tried I could never hope to protect them all the time - that I'd have to trust in them to protect themselves. "Promise me..."

Someone brushed a stray strand of hair off my face and back behind my ear. Trowa's voice was soft near where the fingers rested on my shoulder, chest against my back. "Promise you what Wufei?"

My eyes were squeezed tight. "Promise me to protect yourselves, because I need you... I want you to help me and I need... want your strength now because I don't know if I can rely on my own to do what I have to. I can't do this on my own. I never would have chosen this, but I won't shirk my duty either. So promise me you'll look after yourselves no matter what happens."

I waited, eyes closed, until I caught the faint echoes of their promises. I would do what I needed to do, relying on someone else's strength when I could no longer rely on my own. We would do this together, it was enough to center me again because they were my center.