| "Make a deal" Reviews/Comments [ 8 ] |
Title: Make A Deal
Reviewed By: Megan Consoer [MediaMiner Member] On: January 12, 2006 17:16 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I really like this story alot. Can you please write some more chapters?
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Reviewed By: Drake Clawfang [MediaMiner Member] On: October 23, 2005 20:18 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 1 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 1 of 10
Overall Rating: 1 of 10 Comment/Review:
this is so stupid! Okay, let me list the mistakes you've made. they had sex for ten years!?!? Okasy, how did they eat? That said, how did they go to the bathroom? Do you understand the mechanics of sex? Ejaculation for half an hour? Kagome would explode! Also, if Sess couldn't move for 10 years, he WOULD be attacked. Not to mention that it doesn't matter how long you go without sex; your testicles can only hold so much sperm ya know! By you logic, virgins should have enormous testicles because of not having sex. And your lemon-writing skills are pitiful, going back and forth between words like cock to words like penis and vagina. It seems like someone wrote the first half, and someone else wrote the second part. I agree with KagomeReborn; this is hilarious! If this is how youkai have sex, I'm amazed that there are so many; you'd think they'd get killed while wedged inside their mates. Overall, all you had going for you was spelling and grammer, and originality. But this idea, while original, is pathetic. I suggest taking sex-ed 101 so you can understand that the way you wrote your lemon is incredibly impossible. Try again with a new idea, one that won't make people burst out laughing. And finally, I am a guy, but this fic seems rather demeaning to women. Kagome is tough with a strong spirit. You stick her the housewife position, as you do with Rin. I'll leave this review with 5 final words; This fic is totally STUPID.
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Title: Make A Deal
Reviewed By: Megan Consoer [MediaMiner Member] On: October 04, 2005 16:36 CDT
Comment/Review:
I really like this story alot. Can you write some more chapters?
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Title: Make A Deal
Reviewed By: Megan Consoer [MediaMiner Member] On: October 03, 2005 18:55 CDT
Comment/Review:
I really like this story alot. Can you write some more chapters?
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Title: Make A Deal
Reviewed By: Megan Consoer [MediaMiner Member] On: August 11, 2005 17:00 CDT
Comment/Review:
I really like this story alot. Can you write some more chapters?
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Reviewed By: cyzay [MediaMiner Member] On: August 07, 2005 06:32 CDT
Comment/Review:
hm. i dont know what to say. it's different. there are to many 'author notes' in it thought. and it does seamed rushed. it's an intresting concept i suppose, but it may have worked better as a full flushed out story.
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Title: Make A Deal
Reviewed By: Megan Consoer [MediaMiner Member] On: July 31, 2005 17:44 CDT
Comment/Review:
I really like this story alot. Can you write some more chapters?
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Reviewed By: KagomeReborn [MediaMiner Member] On: July 30, 2005 21:37 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
this is the most amusing story i have read in a long time
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