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| "Guardian Angel" Reviews/Comments [ 5 ] | Title: Skull Monkey
Reviewed By: SkullMonkey [MediaMiner Member] On: June 18, 2007 03:59 CDT
Comment/Review:
damn shadow got old! not really into shreams (and she's SO young!), but we'll see what happens. ya know, i would have made shadow grin evilly and flip sonic off while he plummeted thru the atmosphere of earth-mobius (as u named both). Anyway I'll R&R more of it when you post.
| Reviewed By: Lunarian [MediaMiner Member] On: May 13, 2007 14:33 CDT
Comment/Review:
So Espio joins some strange ninja'esh gang eventually? Weird, he always seemed more of a loner and only tolerated team chaos due to long time sufferings. Heh targeting a person for assasination just for adultery is kinda excessive. Your writing seems to be greatly improving, your starting to make my work look dull. I have trouble seeing Espio as an assasin, he was just too innocent and honorable. Haha what a description, 'dying with a strengthening errection.' I like the chameleon blade, an interesting lowtech weapon. Hahh Shadow really comes off as arrogant there talking about he can't even kill himself. Usually I see Shadow's percieved arrogance as simply him being that good, but that saying just crossed the line. And that there is the angle it seems, Id guess your going with the Kazu her father side or something close to it. Nice how you keep things unsaid it keeps an air of mystery. Hhaha detailing Cream gets you a little too excited. I must have sumthin wrong with me, when I try to write hentai type scenes they don't arouse me, it just feels like clinical text. Well Cream certainly seems o have kept her ultr innocense, being 15 and not even knowing of rape. Amy is certainly very, uhm, expectant of her trip. This is in no way influenced by my like of shadow/tails, but I cant see Tails that cold hearted to Shadow especially since Robotniks done worse and yet at times Tails triesto get chummy with him when they are thrown together by fate. The sudden frank discussion of killings and assasinations seems an abrupt change from any normal talk the gang would have. Heh when Cream knows the more sexual aspect of something before Sonic then you KNOW that Amy's plans dont stand a chance. I have that problem too, the scene just ends suddenly when you no longer have a direction to take the conversation. It was a good chapter, several scenes all varied. Shadow seemed very uninformed for his task especially since he was to find her fast, you'd think Kazu would give more info. Shadows a bit hypocritical, he says he only kills guilty humans and yet he muders bystanders such as the driver just so no witnesses. He could have easily murdered the buisness man without revealing himself. Cream sounds very unchanged from her youngerself, just slghtly more mature. You think maybe Amy wold be more shocked that Cream just blurts out a question of rape like that? She takes it almost too well. I like you have Amy and Rouge defending Shadow after the fact still. 30% off to gun assasinations is the best part. GUN just piss me off the most, I blame it on how the gamecube shadow games goes, You try and do things for hero side yet the Gun bastards still fight you and harass you throughout.
| Reviewed By: Lunarian [MediaMiner Member] On: May 13, 2007 13:39 CDT
Comment/Review:
I had wanted to hold off a bit more before reading .. but if you insist ... mostly ive been tryn to work on my own stuff. Kinda macabre there, 'If I don't survive I dont deserve to live' makes Shadow soud emo. Ok now emo more like the biggest masochist ever. Hmm massive OC overload, my poor synapses. Lets see the nxt chppy.
| Title: Chao! Chao!
Reviewed By: Bucketbrain On: May 13, 2007 07:16 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
Again, you've linked the whole thing to that which is in the gaming world. Not that it's a bad thing of course, makes it more realistic. I personally, am a fan of Shadow and Cream as seperate characters as a whole. So it should be quite interesting to see what is planned here. I have the sneaky suspicion (But don't answer it if you don't want to), that Shadow's latest 'Target' is not an assassination, but is more of a protect/escort task to something that's going to happen to her. But I'm a stupid fan like that, I should just be promptly ignored! You have got a good Chapter 2 I must say. I'm not liking the ages very much, but I'm thinking you're just trying to be as realistic as you possibly can. I'd keep the ages as they are anyway. However, I say that, and it's not my Fiction... so what I day to it matters very little doesn't it? But otherwise, I'm going to be keeping my eye on this one and see how it develops. And in response to the other comment I made that you responded to, I originally wasn't going to leave an E-mail address at all anyway, mainly because I don't normally review in the first place... However, if you're that eager, I suppose I can send you one at some point... You're very much welcome to the review by the way. Sorry if it sounded a bit odd and such, but I normally seem and sound like a complete baffoon anyway. So don't worry about that! Keep up the good work mate!
| Title: nice
Reviewed By: DIPLOMATIC_FOX [MediaMiner Member] On: May 07, 2007 15:13 CDT
Comment/Review:
i am a fan of shad/cream (hell i think i made the first) but for some reason a 64 year old and 15 year old IS JUST PLAIN WRONG! anyway good job
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