| "Don't Slight Shinigami" Reviews/Comments [ 18 ] |
Reviewed By: chibimina [MediaMiner Member] On: February 18, 2006 11:09 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I like it very much. you have a good writing style.
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Reviewed By: justkat [MediaMiner Member] On: January 08, 2005 05:33 CST
Comment/Review:
*Nice* story. I would have liked to read more, especially to see Heero and Duo interacting in their new relationship. It would have been interesting to see how they handled it. Any way, I enjoyed it very much. Thanks heaps.^^
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Reviewed By: Zefyr [MediaMiner Member] On: June 23, 2003 01:39 CDT
Comment/Review:
While I enjoyed the way you brought in old characters - plus it was awfully nifty to finally see Duo kick some major ass - here's a minor grammatical issue that will help readers. For instance:
“You know that’s his charm Duo.” The braided boy laughed at that, nodding in acquiesce.
The problem with the above line is that 'braided boy' = Duo, but Duo isn't the one saying the line, it's Sally. Normally the words following a quote refer, by standard practice, to the person speaking. I've noticed one of your stylistic habits is to have the speaker (quote) and the listener (description) on teh same line, when they should be separated. In some cases, the quote may even go better with the previous paragraph, where you're describing the person who's about to speak, anyway. It'd certainly help with a reader's ability to scan the text rapidly in the course of keeping up with an otherwise fast-paced story.
Also, drop the (1) bits. It's *really* aggravating to have author's footnotes in the middle of a story. Just put notes at the bottom and let us figure it out for ourselves. If it's a translation, either leave it (and let us figure it out) or translate it immediately. And btw, if you don't like 'squat', try 'crouch' instead.
But you've got a way with moving a story rapidly without leaving us too much in the dark or making the development uneven or unexpected. Enjoyed it! |
Reviewed By: Mara-chan [MediaMiner Member] On: May 26, 2003 08:06 CDT
Comment/Review:
this is really cool. i love it and i can't wait til you write more. |
Reviewed By: Kyra-chan [MediaMiner Member] On: March 02, 2003 22:28 CST
Comment/Review:
*cheers happily*
This took you long enough! But am happy it's finally been completed.
Love the characterization of Duo. He's great.
*runs off*
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Reviewed By: Lethanon [MediaMiner Member] On: February 11, 2003 18:30 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
HEEEEYYYYY....man, when does this thing get updated again>? this is great! Go the originaly factor! I love the gang warfare; its awesome, and the writing is well done too.
As for Relena...*runs away to hide* |
Reviewed By: chaotic kitty On: February 14, 2003 09:22 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
ooohhh! love it can't wait for the next chapter |
Reviewed By: Sailor_Jeniss [MediaMiner Member] On: February 04, 2003 20:49 CST
Comment/Review:
wow...THIS IS A COOL FIC!! SO UPDATE!! WEEEE!!! |
Reviewed By: Furie [MediaMiner Member] On: December 12, 2002 15:33 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Update soon this is SOOOOOO good!!!! |
Reviewed By: Arithkenshin [MediaMiner Member] On: November 30, 2002 18:21 CST
Rating(s):Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Comment/Review:
Really need to see the rest of it...It would be a mortal sin not to continue this story :)
Excellent so far
Well written |
Reviewed By: Jordan On: November 12, 2002 20:03 CST
Rating(s):Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Please write more soon. |
Reviewed By: Rei On: November 01, 2002 00:22 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
Very nice indeed. An interesting story told in an excellent way. I like your style of writing (and the lemons were delicious, it's surprising that it was your first attempts at lemons, they were very, very good). I'm looking forward finding out more about Duo. And by the way, I like how you've descripted the chareacters. Especially Duo was *so* sexy. His "whore" outfit reminded me alot of Gackt when performing Illuminati. Yummy yummy. And Duo in leather... wow. I wouldn't mind having him as my pet... ^_^ |
Reviewed By: Kayla On: October 27, 2002 21:39 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Please write more I've been waiting for the longest time to finsih reading this story please get more to it soon thanks
Ja ne |
Reviewed By: ShaeLynn [MediaMiner Member] On: October 24, 2002 21:56 CDT
Rating(s):Enjoyment Factor: 8 of 10
Comment/Review:
8 only cause it's slightly slow at the moment, til we really find out about Duo... anyways... more??? (deceptively sweet voice) |
Reviewed By: Dark Princess [MediaMiner Member] On: October 23, 2002 06:57 CDT
Comment/Review:
exelent ficcy^_^ i love the Duo badness :D any way im really looking forword to the next chappy
~*~Dark Princess~*~ |
Reviewed By: lil debbie [MediaMiner Member] On: October 21, 2002 19:33 CDT
Comment/Review:
~does the happy dance~ AWESOME CHAPTER!! can't wait to read the rest of this one! |
Reviewed By: Loki Angel [MediaMiner Member] On: October 18, 2002 04:08 CDT
Comment/Review:
I'm working on it! I swear, I will finish it at some point. x_0 I just hope by that time mediaminer is fixed, because at the moment, I can't actually edit or do anything to my fics, except for the intial 'New Fic' upload. If you know how to fix this - anyone! Please tell me! |
Reviewed By: Amazon On: October 17, 2002 22:04 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
If you do not continue this story, I will hunt you down and hurt you very badily. *tries to look threatening, failing though* I really like it for real I've been waiting forever for another part. So please continue? *offers pocky as well |
