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| "The Light of destany" Reviews/Comments [ 3 ] | Reviewed By: silveredge [MediaMiner Member] On: January 10, 2005 17:12 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
It is good that you changed the spacing. i like what you did with the story. i thought it was good ^^ spelling is a little off but so is mine so it isnt that big of a deal... Anyways i was wondering if you could read my story? getting people to read Orginals is pretty hard to do. i found that the only way you can get reviews is ask other writers. Anyways i give this story a 10
| Title: Serious mood, at least I think so...
Reviewed By: Elfy_ofthe_Avari On: January 09, 2005 09:26 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 6 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 8 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
I gave it a nine for style of writing because it was a good style, but I've seen it before. You need some more details, adjectives and adverbs. You need to really work on spelling and grammar. I caught several mistakes, and even though I'm a spelling nazi, spelling is something you need. I gave it a ten for originality/creativity because it was quite original, and although it was based on certain things, it was quite good. I gave it an eight for enjoyment factor because I spent half the story figuring out just who was who, where they were standing, what they were saying, and just what was going on, and yet I did like the plot. Maybe it's just me, though, because I'm not very good with names and sometimes I find the introduction of several characters that I've not seen before confusing. You know, like, when you fall off of something, it takes you a few minutes to orient yourself. When I read I kind of feel like I'm falling into a new environment, but maybe it's just me. Remember: it's always clearest in the writer's mind. I gave it an eight for overall rating, because the average was eight. Well, really it was 8.25, but I don't think we need to be exact here... Anyway, laterz for now.
| Reviewed By: PK (NLI) On: October 05, 2004 08:24 CDT
Comment/Review:
It's a pretty neat story, but IT's hard to read. You need to put more spaces and returns in your paragraphs, remember, everytime aperson talks it's a new paragraph so we know that it changes speakers, and everytime a new actionstarts it's a new paragraph. That doesnt' mean ever sentence, it just means that if you switch the orriginal topic of the paragraph, you need to start a new one. **had english class yesterday...** Later, phox
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