Card Captor Sakura Fan Fiction / Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction / Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction / Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ A Fistful Of Omake ❯ What if Akane was a psycho*itch? ( Chapter 11 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

OMAKE OMAKE OMAKE OMAKE

from: Mirrors Reflected.

something i've been accussed of, that i thought might be fun to actually do
intentionally. If Teresa, Cheryl, Glory, Patricia, or one of the other
man-haters i've met recognize some of themselves in here, it's intentional as
you've been such inspiration over the years.

WHAT IF AKANE *WAS* A "PSYCHO-BITCH"

"Kasumi, Nabiki, Ak..." Soun started, then reconsidered. "Kasumi! Nabiki!"

Kasumi demurely took a seat at one end of the table, Nabiki uneasily in the
middle, and Akane flopped down at the end.

"Uhm, Akane, this, er, doesn't really concern you," Soun said uncertainly.

Akane glared at her father, taking this the wrong way. "Having a family meeting
*without* me, father? You KNOW how I feel about that."

Soun swallowed nervously and decided to just bull ahead. "Kasumi, Nabiki, I've
just received word that an old friend of mine is coming to visit and bringing
his son, Ranma."

"A BOY?!" Akane growled angrily. "WHY do we have to put up with a MALE presence
in the house? It's bad enough that there are BOYS at school!"

"I-I-I'm sorry, Akane. It's a matter of honor that the Tendo and Saotome
families be united, so if Nabiki or Kasumi marries him..."

"WHAT?! How DARE you make such an arrangement!"

"Is he cute?" Nabiki wanted to know.

"Oh my," said Kasumi with a slight smile. There was a chance to get out of this
house?

"It's an arranged marriage. It's not unheard of." Soun cringed.

"Do you HONESTLY expect me to sit still for this?" Akane wondered if she had
been too lax with her father of late. Males needed to be put in their place,
unfortunately the law would only allow her to go so far in that regard.

"...but of course, I'd never consider you for such a thing, Akane." Soun quickly
said, after all they were supposed to *unite* the two schools. If Genma's son
turned up missing some day, then there wouldn't be much uniting done.

"WHAT?! Are you saying I'm not good enough?"

"Oh no, Akane. I'm sure father was just thinking about providing for us." Kasumi
shifted slightly, trying to favor the injured leg. Akane hadn't meant to break
it in three places, she just got enthusiastic. Kasumi was mainly sure about
this.

"LEMMEE GO YOU OLD FOOL!"

"OH! It must be Ranma!" Nabiki ran for the door. First come, first served. First
away from Akane.

Akane watched Kasumi start limping towards the door and felt a momentary pang of
guilt. No, if she were to save Kasumi from a loveless relationship, she had to
keep her from spending time around Doctor Tofu. A few threats to the Doctor kept
him from doing much (other than falling apart) and eventually Kasumi would
realize the truth. As an American feminist had once stated "the only true love
is that between two women, everything else is rape."

"Lemmee go, you're scaring 'em spitless!" A short person being carried along by
a panda caused Nabiki and Soun to run back along the hallway.

The short person indicated this this *was* indeed Ranma Saotome. Then Nabiki
made an observation about the newcomer's gender. Soun and Nabiki started
arguing, but upon Nabiki's discovery that the boy was actually a girl, Akane's
attitude transformed.

"You *can't* be a girl!" Nabiki held the girl by her shirt and was shaking her.
"You *can't* be! The kami can't be that cruel!"

"No..." Kasumi sniffled. There went her chance.

Ranma looked at the two older girls and wondered exactly what was going on here.

"Oooo. You're cute," Akane said, already thinking of ways to find out how this
newcomer would look without her clothes. And once she was sufficiently "broken",
there would be many pleasures she could explore at leisure. If the girl *was* a
martial artist, then she'd be a little more durable than most of Akane's
previous recipients of affection.

Akane smiled. "Hey, you're a martial artist. You want to see the dojo? I'm
Akane, do you want to be... friends?"

Kasumi and Nabiki winced as they watched Akane lead Ranma out.

"Father, this is such a disappointment." Kasumi sighed. She was the oldest, she
was the one her father should be arranging to be married first.

"No duh! Really Father, did you think we were *all* lesbian psychopaths?" Nabiki
could admit that she *might* bend in more than one direction, but whips and
chains and fish-hooks were *not* her style.

"But I thought Genma's son was a boy!" Soun watched the puzzled-looking panda
briefly. "Well, Akane won't kill another girl, so that's *some* consolation."

"I thought I'd have an excuse to get away," grumbled Nabiki. "A chance to get
away. Do you have any idea what I have to go through when Akane isn't getting
any from those girls at school?"

"Or when she hasn't been able to 'vent' on any males," Kasumi added, rubbing her
knee.

"Look! Akane's chasing the girl around the backyard."

"So, she's a better martial artist than Akane?"

"Hmmmm," hmmmed Soun.

"Needs to work on her 'avoiding large thrown blunt objects' skills," noted
Kasumi as a stone lantern connected with Ranma's head.

Akane immediately grabbed the girl up and shook her, threatening worse if the
shorter girl ever crossed her again.

"Well, maybe she can get a bath, then maybe I ought to warn her to leave while
she's got a chance."

"Don't do that, Nabiki, you *know* how poorly Akane will take that."

The panda blinked.

-------------------

"Well, your problem isn't so bad is it?" Soun laughed. "These are my daughters.
Kasumi, Nabiki, and, er, Akane. Pick the one you want and she'll be your new
fiancee."

Akane drew a finger across her throat and mouthed the word "die." Give her half
a chance and *she* would show this fake-girl what she thought of the male
gender. She wouldn't kill him, but all sorts of "accidents" could be arranged.
Or he could be taught the same lesson those jerks at school had. She only had to
come near the gates before the (lowly disgusting) males fled like the vermin
they were.

"I... I don't have time for this, I need to go back to China and look for a
cure!" Ranma got up, preparing to exit stage right.

"What a wonderful idea!" Nabiki produced a backpack out of nowhere. "The perfect
chance for me to get to know my fiance better!"

"Nabiki, we have to let Ranma choose." Kasumi shouldered her own backpack. "I've
always wanted to see China, anyway."

"What?!" Ranma managed as he was dragged out the door by two girls.

Akane blinked. "But... I just got some new toys..."

Genma glanced over at his old buddy Soun, who had a cigarette in his mouth and a
blindfold covering his eyes. "Uhm."

---------------

"I can walk by myself!"

Kasumi and Nabiki stopped dragging Ranma.

"Well, come on, Ranma. China and your cure is waiting."

"Oh, uh, right..." Ranma said hesitantly after a moment. He wasn't at all sure
about this, but oyaji could stay with his friend and he could go to China and
get cured.

That didn't sound so bad. Certainly it could have been worse.