Digimon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Around The Anime Horn ❯ The Panel and Cast Remember Columbia ( Chapter 2 )

AROUND THE ANIME HORN

A/N: It's the show of competitive banter… with an anime twist! Our host Art Read dives headfirst into what our four panelists have on their mind. On today's show, we will talk about what our panelists really think should be the greatest invention of all time, Bobby Knight is getting closer to his 800th win, now that Lebron James has lost amateur status, who should he sign with, and who should really be number one in NCAA men's basketball. Our host will then give a speech about what he thinks about the space shuttle Columbia tragedy in a truly heartwarming finale. True patriotism is alive on today's edition of Around The Anime Horn! Yes, I still own nothing.

Day 2: The Panel and Cast Remember Columbia. (Recorded February 3, 2003)

Arthur Read ((version age 15) sits at his desk to begin as lively as ever): These four things I know are true! It would behoove you not to miss the end of this week's episode. Whatever U.S. Secretary of State Colin Powell has to say on Wednesday morning may not have the impact that President Bush hoped for. Now that LeBron has lost his amateur status, I have invited him to be on my show. I don't care what any of the panelists have to say about that, though he might not sign the contract, too bad King James, and I am Arthur Read welcoming you Around The Anime Horn!

(intro Plays to Around The Anime Horn)

Voice Over: It's Around The Anime Horn, the show of competitive banter! Here now Art Read!

Art Read: This is the show that scores the argument, which might make me an argumentee, if there is even such a word. In any event, there is much to argue about, and that much will be argued by these four prominent voices in Anime! First, courtesy of Yu-Gi-Oh!, the guy that makes Gary Coleman feel more comfortable with his surroundings, its Yugi Mutou!

Mutou: I ought to sic the Yami on you. (gets a MUTE for his wisecrack and has already been docked five points)

Read: I bet Yami or Yugi never got muted before, until now. Moving on, continuing this (Read does the quotation signs with his hands)"short lived" tradition (pun is intended), from Digimon Frontier Season 04, is Tomoki Himi!

Himi: Unless you want the same treatment as Ted Williams, I suggest you cut the short jokes!

Read (Himi gets a MUTE): Um… I don't think so. (Pretending to act surprised.) Oh! My hand grazed the button! Representing Pokemon: Master Quest, its resident rocker, Brock Slate! And, representing Digimon Adventure 02, it's the girl mama warned you about, Miss Mimi Tachikawa! This is the show that scores the argument, and here's how it goes:

For the first two rounds, scoring the show will be based on point of view, which I know a lot about, style, and information. The O.K. answers get one point, good answers get two points, and great answers get three points. I use the MUTE button to penalize five points for bad answers and direct traffic. At the end of the second and fourth rounds, we will eliminate the panelist with the lowest point total. It's like Miss America judging, but no senile 79-year-old game show hosts were ever involved in the making of this presentation. Let's make it happen!

Voice Over: It's the opening remarks!

Read: Our first opening remark involves a Knight, Bobby Knight, that is. The Texas Tech University coach is on the verge of capturing his 800th career win. Here is the question: Pound for pound, would you take Mr. Robert Montgomery Knight or Tennessee Lady Volunteers coach Pat Summit who has already reached the 800 win plateau? Around the horn to Tomoki Himi.

Himi: If you wanted to go by who has more wins, championships, and one of the least controversial programs in all of college sports, the nod goes to Summit. (two points given; now at -3) However, it almost seems like that there is more of a ways to go for women's basketball, but it will be Geno Auriema that can help bring great rivalry to a division that needs it badly. (two points given; now at -1)

Mutou: Hey, Himi, if you are wondering why you didn't get more bang for your buck its because of this one fact; (almost screaming) its women's college basketball! (three points given; now at -2) It only seems like now it has found its niche, but I am glad you brought up Auriema who will bring rivalries to the NCAA. But when you talk about greatness, look no further than Knight. Tomoki, the guy has graduated all of his players, he knows the importance of a great education. (two points given; now at 0)

Tachikawa: So you're saying that Summit is not at par with Knight at all, Mutou?

Mutou: Yeah, I'll take that one to the bank if you want me.

Tachikawa: What you fail to see is the fact that Pat Summit got all of her wins at the same program. (two points given; now at 2) people look at Bobby Knight an see a true bully and some people still say he is the coach at Indiana University, the same school he claims spit on him.

Read: All right, that's well and good, but Yugi was just mentioning how Knight could qualify as a patron saint because he is helping kids that just came in there hoping for a boost to the pros get a real education in the lecture halls of the schools. This is for Brock. If we could get some help from ClonAid to give Knight and Summit the same mix of male and female players who would win and why?

Slate: It has to be Knight. This is a guy that has won conference championships from what used to be the best conference in the NCAA, the Big Ten. (two points given; now at 2) He taught Mike Kryzezwski to be the awesome coach he is in the now best conference in the nation, the ACC. Who have you heard coming out of Summit's regime that has gone on to do things special? (three points given; now at 5)

Himi: The only reason Summit hasn't had any real arsenal come out of her program is because ladies professional any type of sport you can think of has been overlooked! (two points; now at 1) It is people like Hootie Johnson and all of the other blatant chauvinists of the world that have made us forget about women in sport.

Yugi and Brock want to make the next remark, which results in a MUTE for Brock sending him to zero. Read tells Yugi to go ahead.

Mutou: Knight will be remembered for his players respecting him. At the end of their four years, everyone wants to thank Knight for helping making their son a man. (two points; now at 2) That is all that Knight ever needs from his players is a thank you.

Slate: The players need to give Knight a thank you and a health bill. (three points; now at three) He may be great, but greatness comes at a price of whether the players will respect you to death or hate your guts.

(horn blares)

Read: Mimi, you have the last word.

Tachikawa: As a proud feminist, I must say that Summit has committed herself to the sport and its growth more than Coach Knight. (one point given; now at 3)

Read: I'll say that basketball, overall needed to grow more, and because of these two, and others, it has become a worldwide business. Next topic! On Thursday, ABC will air a two-hour event with Michael Jackson. It will kick off a very special episode of 20/20. The question is, what will Wacko Jacko have to talk about since his 1997 appearance? Around the horn to Yugi Mutou.

Mutou: Well, you are right about the Wacko Jacko part. But speaking for the last five and a half years since his last 20/20 interview, all he has done is fight lawsuits, see Neverland fall into debt, (two points given; now at 4) miss several concerts due to alleged illnesses, adopt another baby, act like a child in court…

Mutou/Slate: And lest we forget the child-dangling incident in Berlin. (three points for both; Mutou at 7; Slate at 6)

Slate: But, Yugi, remember that he had to deal with Joe Jackson as a father, had that fire on stage in the mid-80s that messed up his scalp, and he declared his record company of being racist. Jackson just needs help.

Himi: You've got to be kidding me. Maybe Michael was right about the metamorphosis thing (three points; now at 4) because Jackson has gone from being the boy next door in '72 to being somebody that would've been better off being hung at the time of the Salem Witch Trials. (two points; now at 6) Honestly, WHAT IS THIS?

Tachikawa: THIS is also the same person accused of sexually abusing young boys during the early 90's. But lets face facts with facts here. Michael Jackson has been known long enough by the entire world to get away with all of the antics known as the cirqué de Wacko Jacko [circus of Michael Jackson] (two points; now at 5). This interview hopefully if it isn't a bust can shed some light on why Michael did all this.

All of the panelists wanted to chime in some more, but with Read directing traffic, that was soon put to a halt.

Read: I just want to throw this one out to Tomoki. With us still not being able to stop talking about the child-dangling incident and with possible charges pending, do you think that Michael might "get what he deserved"?

Himi: I can't really say, Art, but I will give you this bit of information. It is said that Michael was going to originally back out of the interview, but the show will go on this Thursday at 8pm ET. (one point; now at 7)

Tachikawa: Nice plug, but you get no money for plugs on this show unless the help Arthur Read (three points; now at 8). By the way, don't forget about the things Jackson might do that don't involve his past including climbing trees, which he said he likes to do.

Slate: All I am trying to say here is that if this was your average Joe across the street and he realized he had problems that he had not yet solved, he would get help. (two points; now at 8) I don't see much of a difference between what Michael or anyone else should do.

Mutou: Hey, Brock, there is one difference between him and the average Joe. This is probably the greatest entertainer of all time were talking about! (two points; now at 9) He needs time to find the right help before he can find help.

(horn blares)

Read: You all once again make terrific points about the artist known as Jacko, but all I have to say is watch the special. I, personally think it will be a dud.

Tachikawa: That's your opinion.

Read (with his hand over the MUTE button): Hey, Mimi, I've got my hand right here. Oh, the horn was a long time ago. Those were the opening remarks. We use it or lose it next!

After Round 1, the scores are:

Yugi Mutou: 9 points

Tomoki Himi: 7 points

Brock Slate: 8 points

Mimi Tachikawa: 8 points

(cut to commercial break)

(we're back on the air)

Voice Over: Use it… or lose it!

Art Read: And this is the part of the game where our panelists get to be responsible consumers by using it or losing it. I hope Tomoki loses that mushroom cap he calls a hat. First topic! This Wednesday, the United States Secretary of State, Colin Powell will deliver a presentation to the United Nations that will allegedly tell the story of Iraq's weapons programs that continue to exist today. Powell's validity in his case to the UN, do you use it or lose it Mutou?

Mutou: Well, you have to think that Powell wasn't holding back to watch flowers grow in Iraq (two points; now at 11). There was a reason this report was delayed and it was because they didn't want the new information to trickle in to slowly. I'm using it.

Read: Tomoki?

Himi: We now know the reason why information trickles so slowly into Yugi's head (two points; now at 9). But it seems like this is something that could have been done about a day or two after the union address, but this is George W. Bush we are talking about (three points; now at 12) and I'm losing it.

Read: Brock?

Slate: No, I feel this is something they had to have worked on for a period of well over a decade since Mr. No New Taxes was in office a.k.a. daddy. (three points; now at 11) But everyone on Capital Hill appears to be in a calm demeanor thinking the case can sell, so I'm using.

Read: Mimi?

Mimi: I'm losing this pseudo-political nonsense that President Bush has forced fed into our faces for the last seven months, because we, the United States, that is, on the nuclear weapons side of things is just as guilty as Iraq is claimed to be. I say that all countries should disarm and cease their weapons programs before pointing fingers at anyone else. (three points; now at 11)

Read: You know, I completely agree with Tachikawa here. If there is a United Nations agreement to stop all weapons programs, you being the powerhouse country you are don't really need the nuclear weapons. So why lie saying you don't have them when you really do. Next topic! High school basketball phenom LeBron James has lost his amateur eligibility on Friday January 31, when he went into an athletic clothing store and was given two throwback jerseys that were worth $845. Those are his favorite high-ticket items, by the way. LeBron and his lawyers are expected to appeal the decision, but here is the question. If the appeal is denied and James can sign on to these companies, give me the names of the three companies he'd want to sign on first, Tomoki.

Himi: I think that before James gets drafted, he and his team should consider traveling with Ringling Bros. Barnum and Bailey Circus, because that's all that we are dealing with is a full-fledged circus. (two points; now at 14) Then I'd try to ink a deal with HUMMER and Nike shoes. (Himi gets a MUTE; down to 9)

Read: The only problem with that is you put the emphasis on the traveling circus, and not enough on companies really on the prowl to put King James on their stuff. Brock?

Slate: The tip of the iceberg for me was Gloria James going out to get the loan for the H2. But, I agree with Tomoki. Maybe he should call up HUMMER and make a deal. Then follow The Answer, Allen Iverson to Reebok (two points; now at 13) and then sponsor the breakfast cereal Cheerios to convince teens to eat the cereal again. (one point; now at 14)

Read: Mimi?

Tachikawa: I really don't care what the kid sponsors, but I think a great endeavor could quite possibly be the color company, Crayola, to get kids back into art. Then go to Adidas shoes and market the King James Version 1's (two points; now at 13) so I can be the first in line for those. And finally, if he gets enough money, he can sign on to Rolex watches and give them some hipness, if you know what I mean.

Read: Yugi?

Mutou: I think that he should really focus around being a spokesperson for the entire General Motors motif of either fast vehicles or big vehicles. First, obviously, try and get a deal with HUMMER. Second, be the only Cadillac spokesperson we can recognize by name and face. Third, get whatever shoe sponsor will treat you the best. (two points; now at 13)

Read: Remember, that he can't sign now because they are appealing, but if there were any offers he is considering beforehand, maybe he should watch this tape for other possibilities. Next Topic! The Star Search finale can be seen this Thursday night on CBS. One of the hottest categories is the junior singer category where ten-year-old Tiffany Evans turned everyone listening upside down. She earned 20 stars out of a possible 20 stars by the judges on each of her last two performances, and will face 13-year-old Lisa Tucker, who was seen by many to be at an underdog position going into the finale. We gave tapes of these talented young ladies singing and we want to know which one is user material, Brock? Oh, and before we begin, I don't mean that kind of (doing quotation signs with his hand) "material."

Slate: No, I understand, and you would be a fool not to take young Tiffany Evans. This is a girl with the type of story that would make even Hollywood cry out loud and her singing could awake the sleeping giant. Yes, she is going places in the business. (two points; now at 16)

Read: Mimi?

Tachikawa: Give this girl a few more years and she would have defeated Kelly Clarkson on American Idol. Evans does a better job singing than some people that have sung for twenty years or more can. (two points; now at 15)

Read: Yugi?

Mutou: Of course, you have to take Tiffany Evans hands down. And speaking of what she could do on American Idol in a few years, it is enough to even make the savage beast, Simon Cowell cry with joy. (three points; now at 16)

Read: Tomoki?

Himi: I'm using Evans on this one, because from one young prodigy to another, I can tell this young lady just won't be a passing fancy. And just wait until she learns to write her own songs. (three points; now at 12)

Read: I personally look at the match between Evans and Tucker, and there is not much of a comparison. Evans all the way. Next topic! The top 25 coach's poll has Florida at #1 in the nation. But they have a tough conference match up against Kentucky at the Rupp Arena on Tuesday. Florida's opportunities as a legitimate #1, do you use it or lose it, Mimi?

Tachikawa: Lose it, lose it, lose it. Florida isn't even the best team in their conference, the SEC (two points; now at 17) and now you want to give them #1 because Arizona, Pittsburgh, and Duke lose. No, give it to the team that really deserves it, Texas, and call me in the morning. (three points; now at 20)

Read (imitating Joey Katsuya of Yu-Gi-Oh!): Hey Yuge?

Yugi: I say give it to Arizona, because they lost a tough game. Don't give it to Duke if they are going to lose in the same place two years running, and certainly don't give it to a team that isn't even the best in their conference. (two points; now at 18)

Read: Tomoki?

Himi: Florida has done a lot better with their basketball program with

The coach they have, but it isn't a number 1-squeeze job like the poll said. (two points; now at 14) I say take the loss like men and regroup. This is a great team and they are really showing it with this win streak. (three points; now at 17)

Read: Brock?

Slate: There is only one reason why Florida would be put into the top 25, it is because the voters were very depressed and picked the only one that made sense to them, or they couldn't make heads or tails out of what happened with their clubs. (one point; now at 17) I'm losing it.

(horn blares)

Read: If you want my opinion, I do think that the #1 this week should have been Texas. Nobody thinks Florida was a legitimate choice and I believe what they all said. That was the horn and it is time to bid farewell to somebody. (Notices a tie) We have a tie for last place, meaning the panelist with the most overall mutes must go. And Tomoki Himi is outta here! (he waves goodbye as his image is taken off the screen replaced with a black cutout with a yellow outline) I guess he is too young to play our new game, Straight From The Headlines, which is next!

(commercial break is taken)

(we're back on the air)

Voice Over: This is Around The Anime Horn, and after two rounds, here's how they stand:

Yugi Mutou has 18

Brock Slate has 17

Mimi Tachikawa has 20

And Tomoki Himi has gone off somewhere to cry because he had to miss that big purple dinosaur on television.

And now… it's Straight From The Headlines!

Read: This is a game you cannot see on Around The Horn, it is called Straight From The Headlines, and here's how it's done. (while holding up a newspaper) We have our official Around The Horn newspaper filled with facts on all the weeks' happenings. In the paper are sections A, B, C, and D that our three remaining panelists will gripe about. The panelists will pick the section they want and will have twenty seconds each to state their case. Whoever I think did the best in our one on one on one showdown will receive the lion's share of a twenty-point spread! The winner of the argument receives nine points, second place gets seven points and third place only gets the young cubs share of four points. Here is the catch. In only one of the sections, there is a "hot off the presses" card where whoever picks the section with that card inside takes four points from every other panelist giving the panelists that drew the card eight points from their fellow panelists. We will reveal who won the card at the end of the round. Now Brock, since you have the lowest score, you get to decide which section we will banter about first. Which section will that be?

Brock: That will be section C.

Read: First topic, straight from the headlines! To kick off North American motor sports, the sports car race known as the Rolex 24 at Daytona had quite an unexpected winner. The result found the #66 911 Porsche GT3 Cup car driven by Timo Bernhard, Jorg Bergmeister, Michael Schrom, and owner/driver Kevin Buckler, who took this team to a GT class win last year, end up overall winners. Here is the question. What area of international motor sports does Porsche appear to steer away from, but could clearly do well in with the proper funding? Twenty seconds each, we'll go around the horn starting with Yugi Mutou, whose time begins now.

Mutou: I personally think that it would benefit Porsche to go back to rallying. Whether it is with Volkswagen's Beetle, the Audi Quattro TT, or the 911 GT3, I think that it was a real mistake even leaving that form of motor sports. It tests every fiber in the human being to its breaking point, and it's the only form of racing where Mother Nature is always the Host City. It's gotta be rallying.

Slate: No that is a complete and utterly lewd excuse by Yugi for Porsche to go back to racing. And with one of the most dangerous types of racing of all time? Look, if you really want Porsche to make a (with quotation signs on his hands) "comeback to a form of racing", let them do it in drag racing! It's perfect because nobody expects them to dominate like everywhere else until they are established.

Tachikawa: Well, they don't have to be completely new to the sport, or have completely left the sport until recently to make a noted appearance. All they have to do is just show up somewhere, like Formula 1. And this would be the perfect time for any millionaire, or established billionaire to strike it rich in Formula 1 with the rule changes that were designed to cut costs and just make the racing better.

(buzzer sounds)

Read: To be completely honest, Porsche is a brand that picks and chooses the forms of racing that they feel will be the most profitable. I think Yugi did the worst job explaining his case. Brock gets nine points, because I never would've thought of drag racing, Mimi gets seven, and Yugi gets four. (Brock now has 26, Mimi has 27, and Yugi has 22.) Speaking of which, Yugi, pick between section A, B, or D.

Mutou: Section A.

Read: Technology is the focus of our next topic, straight from the headlines! In President Bush's State of The Union Address, he outlined a 1.2 billion-dollar plan to make cars powered by a hydrogen and oxygen reaction that would only produce energy and water. The question is, how far along are we until we given the cars promised for the future, like those seen on the Hanna-Barbera classic, The Jetsons? Twenty seconds each, and we will start with Brock whose time begins now.

Slate: To be honest, those promises were flat lies when we found out how much money it cost to fund air travel of any kind. I think that it will take more than two decades for those promises to be kept and I hope you hold me to that because it just doesn't seem like regular air travel is in the works for America.

Tachikawa: Hey, I agree with Brock, but you have to think about all of the money that will have to be spent. First, our original highway system will have to have absolutely no usage, another system will have to be made to direct traffic above ground, and all of this can only get done if these new vehicles are affordable. That will take at least ten years to happen.

Mutou: Mimi, you are forgetting that we have a system on earth that tracks where other cars are within our vicinity. It's called a GPS, or Global Positioning System, and it fits where your radio would be. I think that the United States would have to spend far too much money to fund the cars we were promised for the future, and don't forget that time is money.

(buzzer sounds)

Read: I think you all sustained great arguments, but the best one was the one by Yugi Mutou, so he gets nine. Since Tachikawa made great additions to what Brock said, I will give her seven, and Brock gets the remaining four.

(Yugi now has 31, Mimi has 34, and Brock has 30.) Mimi will decide our final subject straight from the headlines, and it will be either B or D.

Tachikawa: I'll take section D.

Read: Very well. Our third and final subject straight from the headlines focuses on very popular Super Bowl commercial star, Terry Tate, office linebacker. The question is has Terry Tate become too popular, too fast? Twenty seconds each, and we will begin with our resident girl next door, Mimi, right now.

Tachikawa: I still say that Terry Tate will continue to get popular until people have their fill of employees getting a Warren Sapp-like beat down in front of millions. I guess when you know people are not doing their jobs and you want to do something about it, but can't, it then becomes a turn on for us to see them get knocked off their high horses.

Mutou: Terry Tate had more unforeseen popularity than My Big Fat Greek Wedding, which I still think is in theaters. Now we have a sitcom set to debut in three weeks. This proves to me that you don't need to be advertised into a star, just be your own star and the advertising should take care of itself.

Slate: Terry Tate is just being pushed as this very popular ex-football player who pushes office employees around. Let's see this commercial promotes violence, yelling, and other forms of crude behavior. Seriously, though, it was the Shoe Company that made the commercial that profited off the failed player that made everyone actually tune into this "mama said knock you out" crap and that his the house that Jack built.

(buzzer sounds)

Read: You have to love the desperate attempts made by panelists to get those final points. Desperate enough to forget that this is not an elimination round. I will give that argument to Yugi Mutou, for his comparisons between Terry Tate and My Big Fat Greek Wedding. Mimi gets second and Brock must receive third for bashing Terry Tate. Don't make him come over there. (Yugi now has 40, Mimi has 41, and Brock has 34.) By the way, the person who drew the hot off the press card was… Brock! That's all we have straight from the headlines. We'll take a pop quiz next!

After Round 3, the scores are:

Yugi Mutou: 36 points

Mimi Tachikawa: 37 points

Brock Slate: 42 points

(commercial break is taken)

(we're back on the air)

Voice Over: It's time for a Pop Quiz!

Read: And it's that time of day where we find out how much our panelists learned today. I'll give each of them two questions related to today's show. Get one question right and you earn four points, get two questions right and you earn eight points, but if you get both questions wrong, you will get a MUTE and five points taken off. Panelists, if you're ready, let's begin. Trivia for Yugi Mutou. Hello Mutou. (Moto)

Mutou: Cut the crap jokes and give me my questions.

Read: All right, spoil sport. Besides Bobby Knight, what other 800+ win coach has won a NCAA championship as a player and a coach?

Mutou: (thinks for a bit) Dean Smith.

(fanfare sounds)

Read: That's correct! Now, here is your second question. What Super Bowl advertiser had basketball superstar Yao Ming as a spokesperson?

Mutou: Apple computers.

(buzzer sounds)

Read: You spoke too soon because Visa credit cards was the correct answer. (four points to Mutou; now at 40) Trivia for Brock Slate. What is the name of the United States Secretary of Transportation? Come on, I know you can get this.

Slate: Norman Mineta.

(fanfare sounds)

Read: That is the correct answer! Your second question is what was the name of the chimpanzee that Michael Jackson kept during the `Thriller' and `Bad' era?

Slate: Chimpanzee? Man, I am clueless on that one. I have no idea.

(buzzer sounds)

Read: The name of the chimpanzee was Bubbles. Bubbles like that blue Powerpuff Girl. (four points to Slate; now at 46) Speaking of girls, here is trivia for Mimi Tachikawa. What brand of car finished second overall at the 2003 Rolex 24 at Daytona? Don't let me down.

Tachikawa: (almost guessing) Ford.

(buzzer sounds)

Read: The correct answer was Ferrari. Your second question is, for all the marbles, what brand of General Motors will end production in 2004 after 105 years? This is to stay alive in the game.

Tachikawa: Buick.

(buzzer sounds)

Read: (gives Tachikawa a MUTE; now at 32) The correct answer was Oldsmobile.

(horn blares)

Read: And that horn means it's the end of round four and the end of Miss Mimi Tachikawa!

(Tachikawa is replaced by a black silhouette with a yellow outline.)

Read: We have made the final cut and speaking of final, the final showdown is next!

(commercial break is taken)

(we're back on the air)

Western music plays as we get set for the Final Showdown.

Read: It's the Final Showdown. We have taken all points away from a day's work and have placed all relevance on one single, solitary question. Hello Voice Over?

Voice Over: Yes?

Read: What is our Final Showdown of the day?

Voice Over: Art, our Final Showdown will have Mr. Mutou and Mr. Slate (no pun intended) battle it out over what really is the greatest invention of all time. Its one sixty-second argument between the breeder and Mr. Heart-of-the-cards. Make it happen, we gotta go.

Read: All right, fellas, here is the question. The Massachusetts Institute of Technology says after long research that the greatest invention of all time is the toothbrush. Now, because I know you two can come up with greater inventions than a toothbrush, here is the question. Give me the three greatest inventions of all time and, by the way, they must be specific. Thirty seconds each and we'll start with Yugi Mutou right now.

Mutou: The third greatest invention of all time has got to be the wheel. It has allowed us to go places man would never had imagined he would go on foot and without the wheel, we would still be trying to get to the mountain on square wheels. The second greatest invention is the television, which has given us a better view of the world right from our living room couch and gives us information at the snap of a finger and has amazingly become even more convenient than a newspaper in our microwave society. But the greatest invention of all time has got to be fire. Who says that an invention has to be accredited to one person or a collective group to be a masterpiece. Fire has literally shaped and welded the psyche of the world. My three greatest inventions of all time are the wheel, television, and fire, and I am sticking to that.

Slate: Speaking of sticking, how about what I think is the third greatest invention of all time, glue. It has allowed us to fix the things we tore and it is a lot more convenient than ever before. Today glue can fix scars after surgery, and can repair mistakes in metal. The second greatest invention is music. The same thing that calms the savage beast has also entertained the masses for thousands of years. Some caveman must have said something that was in key and thousands of years later, everyone in the world is critiquing the youth on shows like American Idol and Star Search. Finally, the greatest invention of all time is the printing press. Made by Johannes Guttenberg at the time of the Renaissance, it was the best of times, because everyone was learning how to read and the printing press continues to shape our lives every day in newspapers, documents, and book reports. The inventions are glue, music, and the printing press.

(horn blares)

Read: As always the inventions that were made have shaped how the world does everything and I think Yugi Mutou made that clear. Yugi Mutou wins today, however, he has agreed NOT to use his face time to say what he wants. (in a somber mood) As you all know on February 1, 2003, the space shuttle Columbia, on Mission STS-107, was scheduled to land at Florida's Kennedy Space Center. At approximately 9:00am, the shuttle had reported to have lost all contact with the Mission Control Center in Houston, Texas. It was at that same time that people in the central Texas region reported seeing a flying object in the sky that appeared to be blowing apart. The space shuttle Columbia was 200,000 feet above sea level as it came crashing down like a giant fireball. Debris has been reported to spread as Far West as California and as Far East as Florida. There were no survivors on this, the Columbia's final mission. In 1981, the Columbia had its first mission and it became the first ever shuttle mission in the history of the space program. Columbia is survived by the three remaining shuttles, which are Endeavor, Discovery, and Atlantis. The crew is forever emblazoned on the world's heart as a symbol of true dedication to their work. Their deaths will not be in vain. To Commander Rick Husband, 45, Pilot William McCool, 40, Payload Commander Michael Anderson, 42, Mission Specialist David Brown, 46, Mission Specialist Kalpana Chawla, 41, Mission Specialist Laurel Clark, 41, and Payload Specialist Ilan Ramon, 47, you all have paid the ultimate sacrifice for your countries. You therefore deserve every prayer sent to heaven for you. May God continue to bless the astronauts and may God continue to bless the land of the free and the home of the brave, America. That's it for us, folks. Join us next week, same time, same place when we will have four of the Tamers from Digimon Season 03. For the entire cast, panel, and crew, I am Arthur Read inviting you back Around The Anime Horn. Goodnight.

Everyone comes back to chatter all the way off the air. There is a message before going completely black.

**Remember The Space Shuttle Columbia: Mission STS-107. February 1, 2003**

THE END

R&R for next chapter. Day 3: How to tame the bad boys of the NBA.