Digimon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Around The Anime Horn ❯ How To Tame The Bad Boys of the NBA. ( Chapter 3 )

AROUND THE ANIME HORN

A/N: On this week's edition of the bantering anime circus, we will have four, count them, four Digimon Tamers serve as our panelists. To find out whom, you must read on. We will yap about the Michael Jackson special, because I know most of you saw it, we'll chatter about the bad boys of the NBA, and we will share differentiated comments on the Olsen twins on the week of their 17th birthday. Plus, as a special treat, we will play my new game called, "Who Will Win It All" to find out that very question. So sit back, relax, and know that you are always welcome Around The Anime Horn!

P.S. To the individual that sent me two reviews for episode two, I would like to let you know that this episode will have a section dedicated to the good things about hockey. And to respond to your other comments, I made this fan fiction not as a copying of the real ATH but as more of a weekly newscast featuring your favorite Japanese animation sounding off on different subjects in the news. I thank you for your positive comments about the MUTE and the format, as well. My comment on the real panelists is that I didn't want to create another Woody Paige or another Bob Ryan. Let them do their jobs and I'll do mine. In other words, the panelists have to appeal to the host in their own ways to get either points lost or win a multitude of points. Thanks again and continue to tune Around The Horn.

Day 3: How to tame the bad boys of the NBA. (Recorded February 10, 2003)

(Let the party begin!)

Art Read: These four things I know are true! Did you see the Michael Jackson special last night? I mean did you REALLY see it? What would the NBA have to do about those that do wrong? I never thought that after a board game, I could be so… bored. And I'm Arthur read kicking it Around The Anime Horn!

(intro plays)

Voice Over: This is Around The Anime Horn, the show of competitive banter. Here now, Art Read!

Read: Welcome to Tamers Day on Around The Anime Horn, where there is so much taming, Michael Jackson can continue to have wild animals as pets. Today we'll talk on who will win many of the sports championships, we will exchange thoughts on the leaders of major sports, and we will get in deeper about Wacko Jacko. But first, here are our Tamers ready to call all of the shots. First, to my left, is the guy that caught that "wascaly wabbit-dog" is Henry Wong.

Wong: Shouldn't you be out shaking hands and kissing monkeys? (gets a MUTE for his troubles)

Read: I'll ignore that unnecessary comment. Second, he was the first tamer to say a word, but knowing him, he probably didn't notice, it's Hirokazu Shiota!

Shiota: I did notice that and could you call me Kazu?

Read: You want to be named for a nickel-a-dozen musical instrument, or a kazoo? (two points given) You get two points for bravery, my friend.

Shiota: No, man. (decides just to keep quiet because he is in the lead)

Read: Moving along, we have a girl I wish I could show my fist of the beast king to, it's Jeri Katou!

Katou: I'll give you a fist of the beast king if you don't keep quiet.

Read: Ooh, fiery. Mom always warned me about girls like her.

Wong: Why didn't you MUTE her?

Read: Because she can do no wrong. And finally, representing all my fans in the West Shinjuku prefecture, its Kenta Kitagawa! This is the show that scores the argument, and here's how it's done.

For the first two rounds: Scoring the show is based on point of view, style, and information.

O.K. answers get 1 point

Good answers get 2 points

Great answers get 3 points

Useless answers get MUTE (-5)

We eliminate panelists to a one-on-one final showdown to determine an overall winner. It's like college or high school finals, but without so much stress. Let's make it happen!

Voice Over: It's the opening remarks!

Read: Our first opening remark is Olsen and not one but two Olsen's. The twins Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen turned 17 last week. They have an empire worth nearly one BILLION dollars. WOW! So here is the question. Because I know that you have grown up seeing these girls turn into young women, what will be their impact going into year 18 and beyond? Around the horn to Kazoo Shiota.

Shiota: My name is K-A-Z-U! Kind of like that do-do bird on the Lion King, but with a "K" at the beginning.

Read: It's not named after a musical instrument?

Shiota: No, man.

Read: All right. (takes off the two points given at the beginning; now at 0) Now answer the question.

Shiota: I predict that they hook up with another rising set of twins in the far east, Kouji Minamoto and Kouichi Kimura. (two pints; now at 2) Think of twin with twin, and you will have an awesome combination.

Wong: Hey, Hiro, did you ever wonder why it took you so long to become a tamer? It was because you always had your head in the clouds of imagination.

Shiota (in a defensive mode): I can dream about twins and twins getting together.

Wong: You couldn't dream your way out of reality (three points; now at -2) but one of the more sensible things is the possibility of making real films. You know the ones that are actually (almost screaming) in theaters! (three points; now at 1)

Read: Oh what a comeback!

Katou: Hey, I don't mean to be Wong (two points; now at 2) but I think that they could continue on like another sister pair, like Venus and Serena and maybe stretch their premise a little further with art school in San Francisco. It can just be something to do part time, you know. (two points; now at 4)

Kitagawa: Jeri, if they go to art school, they will lose the one style that even got them to billion-dollar status and that is the teeny-bopper age. (three points; now at 3) All the boy bands and the hype with Lance Bass' possibility of going to the moon makes me almost, I reiterate, almost want to see the hard rock bands make a comeback. (two points; now at 4)

Read: But, then again Kenta, it makes you wonder if they are as ready for their 18th birthday as they are for their 17th. But I want to give this one to Henry. If this were say a chance for Mary-Kate and Ashley to make a new name for themselves, and it is, exactly what would you want them to do to their image?

Wong: What we are in now are changing times. I think that one of the twins should have braided hair like Bo Derek and the other should cut it to almost bald like Sinead O'Connor.

Read: Ahh, (gives a MUTE to Wong; now at -4) you ruined the whole principal of the question. Kenta, what should the Olsen twins do to change their image?

Kitagawa: I think it would be wise for them to drop this family oriented crap that they have been paintball shooting at us for thirteen years (three points; now at 7) and read my lips, Read. Six words; cursing makes the world go round. (two points; now at 9)

Wong and Shiota both want to have the next word. Wong gets a MUTE sending him to -9 while Shiota gets the next chance to earn points.

Shiota: I've been keeping quite for too long and look where it gets me. (two points; now at 4) To be honest, I think that the Olsen's have been out of the spectator's limelight of feature films for so long, they have forgotten the demand it takes to get up at 3am in the morning every day and earn your money like feature film stars would. (three points; now at 7) One more thing, you can't blame this on the twins, because this is the way they were sugarcoated to be and they will end up having to pay for it in the end.

Katou: Kaz, what makes you think that it was the sugarcoating that will be a potential ruin for the Olsen twins?

Shiota: You didn't want them to end up deadbeats like most of the members of Our Gang, or the more mainstream name of The Little Rascals, did you?

Katou: No, and by the way, the Olsen twins would not end up like that. With the money they got from Full House, it would've paid for their college education, and they probably would then grow up as normal teen girls. (two points; now at 6)

(horn blares)

Read: Henry, you have the last word.

Wong: No matter what anyone else has to say, I think that the next years to come will be golden ones for the Olsen's. (one point given; now at -8) They could do collaborations with Brittany Spears, and can add to the teenage movie crap that has surfaced in the last two decades. (three points; now at -5)

Read: I would have chimed in, but the horn was a long while ago. Next topic! It seems as if it was a long time ago when folks like Dennis Rodman, Pat Riley and Isaiah Thomas were controllers of tormenting in the NBA. Today, noteworthy stars like Ron Artest, the entire Portland Trailblazers team, Jerry Sloan, Pat Riley and Isaiah Thomas fill those spots? I guess the more things change, the more they stay the same. The question is, with all honesty, what can be done to tame the bad boys of the NBA? Around the horn to Henry Wong.

Wong: I say we take from them that which really makes the world go round. Not cursing, because I know the NBA doesn't want to be like Vanderbilt Football, (three points; now at -2) but take 7% of what they were going to make that year, and I'm sure many of them will become Quiet Quinn's at the end of the season.

Katou: Quiet Quinn's, Henry? Are you trying to come up with the sayings everyone will be using in the 1920's? (two points; now at 8) I say that the NBA should be harsher in their penalizing to keep the players from becoming to raucous. Higher fines and suspensions, and dare I say it, even banning players from the game completely aren't bad ideas at all.

Shiota: Jeri, if you ban players from the league you sanction, then the league has an ego in the style it runs its business. (three points; now at 7) The basketball association then becomes no better that Major League Baseball (two points; now at 9) so think about what you just said.

Kitagawa: Kazu, I am not feeling your vibes. For example, what makes you think that ego will ruin the NBA. These players have more egos than Bill Clinton does at his neighborhood Hooters. (three points; now at 12) You have to look at all of the recent bad boy moments. Pat Riley, fined $50,000, Ron Artest, suspended 7 games this year alone, Jerry Sloan, suspended 7 games for shoving an official, and Isaiah Thomas is suspended two games for an altercation with a player. And don't get me started on the Portland Trailblazer team that modeled their behavior off a potential Scared Straight special. (three points; now at 15)

Read: That is beautiful, Kenta, but I want to send this one to Jeri. Should the NBA evaluate each case differently and make separate penalties pending on past behavior and other factors?

Katou: Every case is different, so it would only make sense for the NBA to treat every case as if it was different, or nothing will be accomplished. (two points; now at 10)

Wong: I really don't know about…

Kitagawa: Mandatory sentencing gets… (Read gives Kenta a MUTE sending him to 10)

Read: Go on, Henry.

Wong: The fact of the matter is if you want to turn the NBA into the U.S. Federal Court System, then evaluate each case. You will have a long and strung out appeal made by the apprehended player and nothing will really get accomplished. (two points; now at 0)

Shiota: Let's be honest, Henry. Do these big time organizations ever really have closure on even the smallest of issues? (two points; now at 11) It just seems like nothing can ever be considered DONE!

(horn blares)

Read: Kenta, you have the last word.

Kitagawa: Mark my words, Hiro-san, the NBA will come up with a solution to their problems with players, because the only thing they couldn't settle was the marijuana testing in 1999 that led to the lockout. (two points; now at 12)

Read: Going back to the ego thing, it appears that the organizations that have the most cooperation with the players are the ones that end up best in the long run. Those were the opening remarks. We'll find out Who Will Win It All, next!

After Round 1, the scores are:

Henry Wong: 0 points

Hirokazu Shiota: 11 points

Jeri Katou: 10 points

Kenta Kitagawa: 12 points

(commercial break is taken)

(we're back on the air)

Voice Over: Who Will Win It All?

Art Read: And it is the compelling question that we will all find out with the super-quick responses from our panel. First topic! And then there were two. On the FOX network's ever popular show, Joe Millionaire, it has come down to just that situation, with ladies Sarah and Zora left to fight over $19,000/year Evan Marriott. In this fight, who do you think will win it all, Henry?

Wong: I pick Evan to win when everything is said and done. The guy has made so many appearances, you would have thought he had been announced at the State of the Union Address. (two points; now at 2)

Shiota: I'm picking that butler named Paul, who has remained in a passive role throughout this competition, I'm thinking he is really a millionaire and the ladies are trying to woo with him, but that's just me. (two points; now at 13)

Katou: I think that the eventual winner will be the FOX network. They will profit from everyone watching this crap that wasn't supposed to amount to anything, so Rupert Murdoch, my former boss, is the winner. (three points; now at 13)

Kitagawa: You are all wrong. The winner in all of this will be the twenty women when they hire lawyers to sue FOX for false advertising unless the ladies signed a no-suit clause in their contracts, I see that s the next big thing to happen. (two points; now at 14)

Read: I'm surprised of you all that you will not take one of the two finalists as the overall winner.

Wong: They won't marry an average Joe.

Read: Next topic! By the way, I pick Zora to win. The battle of Saturday Morning supremacy has never been more competitive with Nickelodeon on CBS, Discovery Kids on NBC, Disney programming on ABC, the FOX BOX, which is self-explanatory, and Kids WB! Hey Voice Over!

Voice Over: Yes?

Read: Was it ever this bad when you were a kid?

Voice Over: I guess you could say the good old days of Saturday mornings are truly back with a vengeance.

Read: I know, it's great, isn't it? Now, since you know a lot about Saturdays, tell me which network will win the Saturday morning war, Kazu?

Shiota: Are you kidding me, its Kids WB by a landslide. Like Vince Lombardi said, it isn't everything, but it is the only thing. (gets a MUTE for an overused cliché; now at 8)

Read: That is such a bad way to put Kids WB's dominance. Jeri?

Katou: The FOX BOX has too much new stuff to be a contender, who watches Nickelodeon, (three points; now at 16) and seriously ABC Kids? Enough said, its Kids WB.

Kitagawa: I'm going with NBC here, because we will have the Crocodile Hunter, who has carried that gorgeous network Animal Planet through thick and thin. (two points; now at 16) This one is for all of the older kids out there.

Wong: If that one was for the older kids, this one is for kids in general. It only takes three syllables to spell out Saturday morning dominance and they are Yu-Gi-Oh! (three points; now at 5) It's Kids WB!

Read: But, guys, you can't help but feel for ABC Kids when they are coming out with all of these animated features. It seems they try so hard and get nothing in return. Come on!

Throughout Read's monologue, the panel gives him "come on's" and "you've got to be kidding's". In fact, they don't stop.

Read: Guys, we have to keep going. I'll MUTE you all! (that is exactly what Read does and it sends Wong to 0, Shiota to 3, Katou to 11 and Kitagawa to 11) That is what you get for not listening to the host the first time. Next topic! As of right now in the NBA, the Los Angeles Lakers would not be in the playoffs. Sportswriters from across the country have included in their nighttime prayers a 1/8 match up between either the Mavericks or Kings and the Lakers. But the question is, who will win it all in the NBA, Jeri?

Katou: I think that with the best of seven format in the first round and throughout the playoffs, the advantage should go to the most resilient team, and that is the Los Angeles Lakers, so everyone else should watch out. (two points; now at 13)

Kitagawa: The New Jersey Nets are a better team that last year and I'll say that they are good enough to play for the national championship this time around. (one point; now at 12)

Wong: It is the Sacramento Kings as long as Chris Webber stays healthy. (three points; now at 3) Without the web, the entire spider falls to the ground, so I'll say the Kings.

Shiota: I pick the structure of the big three and the Dallas Mavericks. Possibly the most stable bench in all the NBA, no controversy and speaking for Mark Cuban (three points; now at 6) I just want to hear what he has to say when accepting the Larry O'Brien trophy. (two points; now at 8)

Read: If Bob Ryan were here, he'd say "Oh, I want the Houston Rockets to win. You bet. Yes sir, Yao Ming is my man. Oh yeah!" But… I pick the Indiana Pacers to win outright. Next topic! The NASCAR Winston Cup Series just wrapped up qualifying at the Daytona International Speedway, and Jeff Green won the pole, or first place starting position. He and Dale Earnhardt Jr.'s position of second place were the only two positions locked in for Sunday's Daytona 500. But I want to know, who will win the 2003 NWCS Championship, Kenta?

Kitagawa: It has to be the Goldenboy, Jeff Gordon that will win his 5th national title, (two points; now at 14) and I'd like to put in a vouch that his crowned prince, Jimmie Johnson gets 2nd place in Cup standings. (two points; now at 16)

Wong: Of course, I would want to pull for Hideo Fukuyama, but that will happen when it snows in August in Los Angeles. (three points; now at 6) But the guy I think has the best chance of winning the cup this season is Sterling Marlin. (two points; now at 8) Watch out for this guy.

Shiota: We all know Fukuyama won't win, but I pick Ryan Newman to pull off an upset to end all upsets in NASCAR and win his 1st of many cups at age 25. (one point; now at 9)

Katou: I pick Chevrolet driver Kevin Harvick to win the Winston Cup in truly dazzling fashion… (Katou gets a MUTE because Read thinks she is bluffing; now at 8)

Read: Let's be real, Jeri. Kevin Harvick winning the Winston Cup when he is the bad boy of the sport next to Tony Stewart? And why didn't any of you pick Stewart? I'll fathom that later, but now we have to eliminate… we have a tie between Katou and Wong? The person with the most overall mutes is the first panelist to hit the road and Henry has a considerably large amount of times he got a MUTE, so he must hightail it!

Henry Wong's picture is replaced with his silhouette with a yellow outline on the edges.

Read: That was Who Will Win It All, now we will look at The Good Stuff next!

(commercial break is taken)

(we're back on the air)

Voice Over: It's Around The Anime Horn, where after two rounds, here's how they stand:

Hirokazu Shiota has 9 points

Jeri Katou has 8 points

Kenta Kitagawa has 16 points

And Henry Wong had to go get Terriermon ready for the Westminster Dog Show. Though, I doubt he evolved from a dog.

And now… it's The Good Stuff!

Art Read: And it's another one of our original games at Around the Anime Horn, but in this one compared to others, the less said, the better. I will bring up a series of topics that have really been overlooked by just about everyone in the news. We will go Around the Horn with our panelists who will have 25 words or less to give me the good stuff about that subject. Whoever does the best job in the categories wins the majority of a seven-point spread. The winner gets four points, second place gets two points and third place gets one point. And to help me nab those that use too many words, I brought Elwood City's residential genius Alan Powers, but around my blocks, we just call him "The Brain". No relation to Bobby Heenan to those wrestling fans out there. Anyway, I'll have Brain explain his role to our panel. Brain?

Brain: Thanks, Art. Our three remaining panelists will bear witness to my amazing counting skills. If any of them say even 26 words, I will give the signal to Read to have them get a MUTE, and a deduction of five critical points. That's pretty much the gist of it, I'll send it back over to Read in the studio, Art?

Read: Thanks Brain. And now its time for our first topic. On February 7 the International Chess Federation (FIDE) held its sixth Garry Kasparov vs. IBM Supercomputers match ending in a draw. Kasparov is the top ranked chess player in the world, while IBM's Deep series has been trying to beat Kasparov for the last six years. Give me the good stuff about man vs. machine matches in chess, Hirokazu. Remember that you can only do it in 25 words or less starting now.

Shiota: The best chess players in the world have competition, but then again, when have you seen a machine has defeated the best man in chess?

Read: Brain tells me you cut it real close getting in all 25 words. Jeri Katou, the best things about chess matches pitting man vs. machine, starting now.

Katou: Soon, we will have machine go against machine, but first, the machine has to beat the man clear cut on multiple occasions.

Read: 22 words there, you're fine. Kenta, you have 25 words or less, starting now.

Kitagawa: Kasparov can still show up all of the best in mainframes, and Las Vegas will continue to strut their stuff whenever bet makers have their doubts.

Read: I'm sorry, Kenta (gives Kenta a MUTE; now at 11) Brain is telling me you used 26 words, so not only did you lose five points, but you are also not eligible for a piece of the seven-point spread. I think that Shiota made his point when saying no matter how good a computer is, a man programmed it and a man can beat it. (Gives Shiota four points; now at 13, and Katou gets three points; now at 11) Next topic! The National Hockey League has had in the last two weeks, a fine end to its newly formatted all-star game and close matches between its first class clubs, the Detroit Red Wings and the Colorado Avalanche. This coming although, the NHL has low salaries and even lower TV ratings, but I want to know all the good things about hockey, besides it being like two sports in one. We'll start with Jeri Katou. You have 25 words or less, starting now.

Katou: It is one of the most aggressive sports requiring a great body, and you have to have great hand eye coordination to play great.

Read: Way to get in 22 words. It is Kenta's turn now. He has 25 word or less that begin right now.

Kitagawa: There is more fighting than the older Springer show episodes and they have one of the best dental plans in all of sports.

Read: Kitagawa able to squeeze in 23 words. We'll see if Shiota can do any better with 25 words or less, starting now.

Shiota: You need to make larger nets, bigger pucks, a larger ice, and most of all, do not encourage fighting.

Read: Shiota didn't look for the good stuff in hockey, maybe that's why his argument was only 19 words, but I think it was Katou that did the best job in that category. (Katou gets four; now at 15, Kitagawa gets two; now at 13, an Shiota gets one; now at 12) Next topic! February has been labeled as the dormant month for all sports, but I want to know the good stuff about the month of February. Kenta will start, he has 25 words or less and they start now.

Kitagawa: You have Flag Day in Mexico, the NASCAR season begins, and only a few weeks until spring training.

Read: Flag Day in Mexico? That makes your 18 words sound like a waste of complete time. Can Hirokazu do better with his 25 words or less? Remember to give me the good stuff and do it now.

Shiota: Look forward to Valentine's Day, the beginning of the NASCAR season, and another season of the daytime drama known as baseball.

Read: 21 well said words from Hirokazu Shiota. Jeri Katou has 25 words or less to give me the good stuff and they must begin now.

Katou: You have Valentine's Day, a few more weeks to spring and warmer weather, and Oscar and Grammy's happen within weeks.

Read: 20 words out of Jeri Katou. I think that Jeri had the more original argument, but seriously, Kenta, Mexico's Flag Day? (four points to Katou; now at 19, Shiota gets two; now at 14, and Kitagawa gets one; now at 14)

(horn blares)

Read: I'd like to thank Alan "The Brain" Powers for assisting me in the word counting. That was The Good Stuff, there will be a Pop Quiz next!

At the end of round 3, the scores are:

Hirokazu Shiota: 14 points

Jeri Katou: 19 points

Kenta Kitagawa: 14 points

(commercial break is taken)

(we're back on the air)

Voice Over: It's time for a Pop Quiz!

Art Read: You heard the Voice Over, but for this quiz, you don't need a pencil and your notes will serve no purpose. I will ask the three panelists two questions each related to the material on this show. If they get one question correct, they earn four points, get both right and earn eight points, but if you get both questions wrong, you will receive a MUTE and a deduction of five points. And with last place as close as it is, it is critical not to miss both questions. Trivia for Hirokazu Shiota. Give me the names of four chess pieces.

Shiota: The queen and king, the pawn and the knight.

(fanfare plays)

Read: That was correct, and we also would have accepted the bishop and the rook or castle. Your second question is for what picture did Marlon Brando refuse to accept the `best actor' Oscar?

Shiota: The Godfather… (hesitates and ponders for a few seconds) part two.

(fanfare plays)

Read: You were that close to getting the time buzzer, but you got the correct answer in right on time. (eight points; now at 22) It's time for Jeri Katou's trivia. Besides the Olsen twins, what other set of twins has also starred in their own series in the 1990's decade? It's another set of twins.

Katou: The Baldwins.

(buzzer sounds)

Read (who is also imitating a buzzer): It's the Mowrys. Tia and Tamera. Your second question is, what show on the FOX BOX has an aspiring chef in the main role and viewers sending in pictures of living food?

Katou: The Fighting Foodons?

(fanfare sounds)

Read: That is correct and your hopes of making it to the final round are still alive. (four points; now at 23) And, honestly Jeri, the Baldwins? Anyway, Kenta, you need both to have a chance in the finals. Your first question is, as of the all star break, what team has the worst record in the NBA?

Kitagawa: The Memphis Grizzlies.

(buzzer sounds)

Read: No, the Cleveland Cavaliers. Kenta, you have been mathematically eliminated, so you must fill out your walking papers and leave, now.

His silhouette with a yellow outline replaces Kenta's picture.

Read: There are some that just don't have it to get to the Final Showdown, and we will showcase the two that do next!

(commercial break is taken)

(we're back on the air)

Voice Over: It's time for the Final Showdown!

Art Read: It's that time of day where the points from before are in the past. All relevance has been placed on the proverbial shoulders of the question I have in this envelope.

Read opens the envelope.

Read: This will be a sixty-second argument to determine the outright winner of fifteen seconds to say what they want. Here we go. Did you see the Michael Jackson special last night? I mean, did you REALLY see it? Well, 27.4 million viewers tuned in on Thursday to watch, and here is the question. What do you think of Michael overall after watching the special? Thirty seconds each and we will start with Jeri Katou, right now.

Katou: Somehow, I almost feel for everything that Michael had to go through for nearly 45 years, but the keyword there is almost. I think that those are not his children, by blood, I believe that Michael adopted all three of them and I believe that Michael's relationship with Debbie Rowe is nothing but a scam to make us believe those were his kids. I feel sorry for Martin Bashir, the man that spent eight months with him, watching him feed Blanket, finding out that he has learned absolutely nothing from the 93' sexual abuse incident because he still has them sleep in his bed, sometimes even with him. I feel absolutely no different than what I felt before the special, because I still think he was a nutcase for dangling Prince Michael outside the Berlin hotel.

Shiota: With all the money Jackson spends at that Las Vegas shop, you would think that he could spend it go get some brains, but the man has had to deal with his father's abuse ever since he left their home in Gary, Indiana. I say that the man needs help. I do think he had more than just two plastic surgeries on his nose. I'll predict about 10 of them, but watching Michael feed Blanket then watching him take him to the other room was about as lascivious as watching that 12 year old hold Michael's hand as if they were lovers. And, if you paid real good attention to the special, Michael said he was four. This would be a psychiatrist's field day. Michael just never got the opportunity to be a kid and he has been the victim to his own wants and desires.

(horn blares)

Read: Jeri, are you heartless? You have to give the man some credit for all he has done, but you also have to feel sorry for him knowing what has become of him. I truly, truly think that Michael has broken the law on several occasions. By inviting children to his ranch and letting some sleep in his bed with him shows some kind of desire. But Jeri ruined her chances, not because she is a girl, let it be known right now I am not a sexist pig, but not going into detail with the material of the Bashir interview. Hirokazu Shiota wins.

(fanfare plays)

Read: for this win, my friend, you have earned a total of 15 seconds to say whatever you want and they begin right now.

Shiota: These days, it seems as if all sporting organizations have forgotten their roots. For basketball, why can't we play with peach baskets that have no holes? Why can't we play backyard football with no padding and for once in baseball we can have a day all players and owners agree to, `no Bud Selig for a day' day.

(horn blares)

Henry and Kenta re-materialize back on the fiberoptic screens.

Read: That would be a fun day. All right, that is all she wrote folks. Next week, our panelists will be Tristan Taylor, Yolei Inoue, Gary Oak and Hikari Yagami. They will all be here and we hope you will be too. For the entire cast panel, Alan Powers, and the crew, I'm Art Read saying goodnight and always have fun kicking it Around The Anime Horn!

Read and the panelist chat into going off the air.

(We are off the air!)

Please R/R for next episode. Day 4: And the award goes to… The Daytona 500?