Digimon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Around The Anime Horn ❯ And the Award Goes To…The Daytona 500? ( Chapter 4 )

AROUND THE ANIME HORN

A/N: Welcome to another edition of the competitive banter circus. On today's episode, we will chat about the shortened Daytona 500 (272.5), we will speak argumentatively about Oscar and Grammy nominations and we will discuss strong feelings about the primary people in the Showdown With Saddam. We will also discuss alternate penalties for Clara Harris, who ran over and killed her husband with a Mercedes after a dispute with he and her mistress. Without further delay, it is time to pull and fasten your seatbelts tight for the wildest ride in variety fan fiction… it's Around The Anime Horn!

Day 4: And the Award Goes To…The Daytona 500? (recorded February 17, 2003)

(we're on the air)

Arthur Read: These four things I know are true! NASCAR made an absolute mockery of the Daytona 500 by shortening it. I had to walk two miles just to get to the studio, but no one seems to care. I feel that the Oscars, Grammys, and Emmys should be done at around the same part of the year, we could have a special show about them and I'm Art Read welcoming you Around The Anime Horn!

(intro plays)

Voice Over: This is Around The Anime Horn, the show of competitive banter. Here now, Arthur Read!

Read: Welcome to the little argument show that could. Today we talk about just getting in shelter and out of the massive snowstorm in the east, the Oscar and Grammy nominations at last, and are the states getting too much of Michael Jackson. That will be done by are esteemed panel and here they are. First, from Yu-Gi-Oh!, looking sharper than cheddar cheese, its Tristan Taylor.

Taylor: Sharper than cheddar cheese?

Read: Hey, I know it was corny, but I really don't care. To his right, its Gretchen from Recess. No I'm kidding, I'm kidding. Don't turn or turn away from your television sets or monitors. It's actually Miyako Inoue from the Adventure 02 series.

Inoue: You have got to be even more sexist than Max Kellerman. (given a MUTE)

Read: Don't use that name on MY show! That name is a four-letter word! Moving on, from the Pokemon series, a true stable that stands taller than a tree, or at least the leaf on the tree, it's Gary Oak, and finally from the entire Adventure series, it's recording artist 50 cent. No, I'm kidding again; it's Hikari Yagami.

Yagami: 50 cent. That is exactly how much you are worth!

Read: I'm going to ignore that comment. This is the show that scores the argument, and here is how it's done.

For the first two rounds, we score the show based on point of view, style and information.

O.K. answers get 1 point

Good answers get 2 points

Great answers get 3 points

Worthless/Useless answers get a MUTE (5-point deduction)

We eliminate panelists at the end of the second and fourth rounds so a one on one showdown determines the winner. It's like a poetry reading at a poetry club, except we don't give our panelists any refreshments because they must last through my craziness to get all the way. Let's make it happen!

Voice Over: It's the Opening Remarks!

Read: Our first opening remark deals with the nominees. Now that the nominees for both the Oscars and the Grammy's have been announced, it is only human nature to discuss who should be on the lists that isn't, who will take home the most statuettes and who is going to win it all. That is the question. I'd like an answer, Miyako?

Inoue: When it comes to the Grammy's, here is how it will turn out. Record of the year without a doubt will go to Norah Jones, album of the year is Nellyville, The Eminem Show, or The Rising. (two points; now at -3) Song of the year will also go to Norah Jones who will win best new artist, as well.

Taylor: No, that is where you are wrong and here is why. The Best New Artist is Ashanti (three points; now at 3) the hip-hop princess. For male/ female pop vocal, I pick John Mayer and Avril Lavigne. Album of the year should definitely go to Bruce Springsteen for making a comeback with the E-Street Band as well. (one point; now at 4)

Oak: Not exactly, Taylor. It's Aaliyah that will win out of having an awesome voice. She was the original hip-hop princess next to Mary J. Blige (three points; now at 3) and some of those votes will come out of pure sympathy to boot. (three points; now at 6)

Taylor (in unison): Do you have any… (gets a MUTE; now at -1)

Inoue (in unison): I beg to… (gets a MUTE; now at -8)

Read: I just want to throw this one out to Kari. You have the last word on the Grammy's.

Yagami: Norah Jones is a true musical talent. She will win best new artist and a couple more before the night is over. Norah is probably only going to win them for the wrong reason; race. (three points; now at 3)

Read: All right, panelists. You have had your fun with music now its time to talk about the Oscars. I want you all to give me their predictions for best picture, best actor and actress, and the crucial category of best-animated film, starting with Gary.

Oak: I think the winner for actor is going to be Jack Nicholson for `About Schmidt'. The man has more academy nominations than anybody else does with 12. The story rivals the state of the midlife crisis in adults. (three points; now at 9) The Best Actress will be Diane Lane best picture goes to The Hours and best-animated film has to go to Lilo and Stitch.

Inoue: Am I hearing this correctly? You would rather go with a Disney film than go with Spirited Away? (two points; now at -6)

Oak: I thought Disney paid you pension. (two points; now at 11)

Read: Strong comebacks from today's panel.

Inoue: Nicole Kidman will probably get the best actress nod for the film The Hours. I personally think she was cheated out of the title for Moulin Rouge. (three points; at -3) Then, I would give the best actor nod to Daniel Day- Lewis, best picture has to go to Lord of the Rings, who was successfully able to make a sequel that was better that the first. (two points; at -1)

Oak (in unison): Yolei, you are forgetting… (gets a MUTE; now at 6)

Yagami (in unison): If I could add…

Read: Go on, Kari.

Yagami: Daniel Day-Lewis is fine, but his look is outdone. Short hair is in these days and I think his look was a little deceiving. (two points; at 5)

(horn blares)

Read: Tristan, you have the last word.

Taylor: The award for best animated feature should go to Spirit, the best actor is Nicolas Cage for acting like he was married to Lisa Marie Presely (three points; at 2) and the best picture should be The Pianist.

Read: My choices even though you may not want to hear them are About Schmidt for best picture, Salma Hayek for best actress, Adrien Brody for best actor and Ice Age for best animated film. Next topic! After last week's bust on Joe Millionaire we will find out tonight whether it will be Zora or Sarah that will have their fairy tale come true at the French chateau. A big surprise is expected to go down after the choice is made. The question is, what is the surprise? Around the horn to Gary Oak.

Oak: I just want the big surprise to be that I never have to hear from these losers again. We are talking about the dumbest guy in all of television next to some of The Gong Show performers. (two points; at 8) The only surprise that will make me impressed of any of this crap is if they will send Evan and Zora to Mars!

Taylor: Gary, it couldn't have been a total loss if all these people had been interested in what dumb thing Evan would do next or what stunt would the women pull to spend quality time with Marriott. (three points; now at 5) I personally think that Married in Alaska and Temptation Island were steamier than this ecstasy. The surprise should be that they are given the French Chateau and some start up money.

Yagami: Tristan, this show was not a failure at all. People tuned in because it was nothing but bull, but it was getting to the point where people were addicted to this show giving FOX many viewers like all their specials. This surprise is nothing but eye, ear, nose and throat candy for viewers. (two points; at 7) It is all about ratings. (two points; at 9)

Inoue: That is where you step into the darkness, child of light. (two points; at 1) The problem with this show is basically the fact that FOX has awesome comedies and dramas like 24, but nobody is watching them! It is either they can't get enough of some thirty year old Friends (three points; at 4) or they are fascinated at the data found in one strand of hair. (two points; at 6) When these shows leave, it will be time for FOX to take over and that is the big surprise.

Read: Great answer, but this one is for Tristan. Do you think that reality television will have a takeover within the next few years?

Taylor: I think it is a strong possibility that these shows will takeover the airwaves. The only problem is that these shows cannot be easily syndicated for further use out of the primetime shell. (two points; at 7) It cost less to make the shows and that is the type of magnet that will draw suspecting producers to making new shows possibilities and realities.

Oak: Tristan, I still think the American psyche has not worn out to the core. There are still opportunities to get even sleazier and trashier than the next reality show. (two points; now at 10) FOX will prove their worth when their next alleged hit, `Married by America' makes it to mainstream. But I think we have a long way to go before we hit rock bottom.

Yagami: We have these shows because people are willing to follow the criterion that is in the contract. We as people just want to be seen for the things we can do. Perhaps there is a stronger feeling than what is being let on by these real people. Is it the money or something bigger? (two points; at 11)

(horn blares)

Read: Miyako, you have the last word.

Inoue: Reality shows will offer stiff competition because people want to see what people will do. (one point; at 7)

Read: That was the horn. We'll play Fact or Fiction next!

After round one, the scores are:

Tristan Taylor: 7 points

Miyako Inoue: 7 points

Gary Oak: 10 points

Hikari Yagami: 11 points

(commercial break is taken)

(we're back on the air)

Voice Over: Fact…or Fiction!

Art read: It's the game that has taken ESPN by storm and we are playing it. You can play along too. First topic! Yesterday, the 2003 Daytona 500, or should I say 272.5, was called after 109 laps due to rain. Michael Waltrip won his second race in the last three years at Daytona in February. Seeing that the 500 is the biggest race of the year it should run the entire distance. Is that fact or fiction Tristan?

Taylor: That is a fact. Seeing how much money the networks spend to get NASCAR on the air and the near 30 million fans that tuned in to see a 500-mile race the only thing they deserve is to see just that. (two points; at 9)

Read: Inoue, take it.

Inoue: That is fiction. It says clear as day in the rulebook that when the race has been completed at half the advertised distance it is then determined by the sanctioning body that the race be deemed official if it can't be continued. (three points; at 10)

Read: Gary?

Oak: It's a fact. The people that parked haulers at the track for ten days and all of the dedicated fans of NASCAR deserve to see a full race. I personally believe that to get a full race and more viewers, the race should be run in primetime. (three points; now at 13) The sky is the limit for the possibilities in front of NASCAR.

Read: Kari?

Yagami: It is a fact. If the Super Bowl was called three minutes into the fourth quarter, then you would have a large television audience, advertisers and several live fans go home disappointed because the sport gave you a slap in the face. (two points; now at 13)

Read: I feel that NASCAR needs to reevaluate their procedures for stopping races to the point where teams, drivers, sponsors and most important fans can go home happy. Next topic! Chief UN Weapons Inspector Hans Blix continues to ask more time from the UN to complete their report on the Iraqi's alleged weapons program. While that happens, Colin Powell continues to pressure countries to join in the war effort while Turkey prepares to sell its land to the highest bidder for camps to keep the soldiers. The possibilities that Saddam Hussein is (with quotation marks) `sitting pretty' while the soap opera that is the UN wages on. Is that fact or fiction, Miyako?

Inoue: I think it is a fact. As long as the UN can't agree with the US as to whether the possibilities for war are realistic, Saddam can sit around his mansion with his body doubles (three points; now at 13 while Read quietly laughs) probably watching this program.

Read (light laughter): Gary?

Oak: That is fiction. The USA can go to war at anytime and they don't even need the approval of the UN to make it happen. (two points; at 15) What I think will be the downfall for the US are the 20 European allies they have who might want UN approval and are not as adamant to jump right into shark-infested waters without knowing the risks.

Read: Kari?

Yagami: It is fiction. Saddam will not be cocky enough to say that maybe my army can beat your army. The Iraqi's might be having a revolution against the one that rules by fear. So just sitting back is no option. The man must keep his guard. (two points; at 15)

Read: Tristan?

Taylor: I think its fact. The way that the French ambassadors are so against war, you would think that they were part of the hippie movement. With that big an influence to the UN absolutely opposed to any type of Iraqi war, it will be hard to get just about anything accomplished. (two points; now at 11)

Read: I actually think Tristan made the best point. If France was not as big a portion of the UN as it is then we really would not have the long, drawn out arguments that flood the news network screens every day. Next topic! Clara Harris was sentenced last week to spend 20 years in prison for running over and killing her husband with their Mercedes-Benz. The incident stemmed from arguments with Harris' husband and his mistress. Clara Harris deserving of a lesser penalty for her gruesome actions. Is that fact or fiction, Gary?

Oak: Absolute fiction. For years, women fought for suffrage to gain equal rights of men. Along with these rights come responsibilities and Mrs. Harris must now bear the weight of those responsibilities. (three points; at 18)

Read: Kari?

Yagami: It is a fact. Her jail sentence should have some years taken off, but she must understand the consequences of her desire to save her marriage. And to think if we lived about 350 years ago, this kind of behavior by Mrs. Harris' husband would have resulted in the death of his mistress and himself. I don't understand why couples don't talk like they used to. If that was the case, none of this could've happened. (two points; at 17)

Read: Tristan?

Taylor: It's fiction. Part of the women's suffrage movement was so that women could have equal rights all around. That includes going to jail (three points; at 14) and that is what Clara Harris is going to have to face. Nothing but equality.

Read: Miyako?

Inoue: I think its fiction. Unless you are mentally sick you know the consequences of murder. You have to have a real good reason to go outside your unspoken vow as a U.S. citizen just to watch your husband pay for his devilish acts. (two points; at 15)

Read: Next topic! It seems as if the fight between Mike Tyson and Clifford Etienne keeps coming and going like a radio wave. Tyson arrived in Memphis ready for training and acting as if the fight was on comes out saying the fight was off. Then he says the fight is back on, but Clifford says that Tyson is too late and that he called the fight off. One moment, it's on the next moment its off. So, Tyson and Etienne's chances of even happening, are they fact or fiction, Kari?

Yagami: Nothing but fairy tale fiction. I don't think the Black Rhino Etienne is afraid of Tyson, but he called off the fight so many times, you had to feel somewhat concerned. But the night isn't a total loss because you have Jay-Z performing (three points; now at 20) and if you come, Art, maybe Tonya Harding can break your sexist… (MUTE; now at 15)

Read: Ahh. You just had to ruin your chances at making it to the next round by insulting the host. (whispering) I am NOT sexist! Tristan?

Taylor: I think it is a fact. And I heard that Michael Jackson was the one that covered his face just because he is such an expert. (one point; at 15) I think his face tattoo was of many monochromatic flames.

Read: That's enough, Taylor. Miyako?

Inoue: I will say fiction. The Memphis boxing commission probably gave Tyson the license because they needed some way to get some quick bucks. (two points; at 17) Our society is a `money talks' society and money is screaming in Memphis.

Read: Gary?

Oak: Etienne has to fight Tyson to get money. It is an absolute fact that they will rumble in the Deep South. All with the almighty buck hanging in the balance. (two points; at 20) Watch has-been verses was-he-ever on Saturday.

(horn blares)

Read: That was the horn… and we have a tie! Between Tristan "I really think I am man enough to insult Michael Jackson with Arthur Read around" Taylor and Kari "I don't like Arthur because he is nothing but a sexist pig that will never let a female win this show rather they stay in his house performing gratuitous lesbian acts for his choosing to pleasure over" Yagami. You know what? (MUTE to Kari; now at 10 and out of the competition) I just don't like being called sexist. That is just not I. You're gone!

Kari is replaced by her silhouette with a yellow outline.

Read: That was Fact or Fiction. We'll do a little "Role Play" next!

(commercial break is taken)

(we're back on the air)

Voice Over: It's Around The Anime Horn where after two rounds, here's how they stand:

Tristan Taylor has 15

Miyako Inoue has 17

Gary Oak has 20

And Kari Yagami had to take the fastest flight to Art's house to get ready to perform gratuitous acts of lesbianism. Say that three times fast. And now it's "Role Play"!

Read: This is role-play. If you are a fan of the PTI version, you will love this. Our three remaining panelists have been given heads on sticks. They will offer arguments to the other two panelists and whoever gives the best argument gets three points. Second place gets two points and third place gets one point. Keep in mind panelists, if you are doing the role-playing and you deliver the best argument, you get five bonus points. There will be thirty seconds time for the argument and ten seconds for each of you, but remember that the role player must always start first. If we are ready, Tristan has the first role.

(Tristan is David Letterman)

Taylor: Letterman, huh?

Read: You are finally going to have Dr. Phil on your show tonight. For nearly half a year, you have tormented the guy, saying he doesn't belong on TV. How should Dr. Phil begin to perform your execution on national TV? Ten seconds each and we shall begin with Tristan now.

Taylor (as Letterman): I just think the good doctor should leave me alone. I was actually trying to make fun of Jeffery Tambour but got the two mixed up. It happens.

Inoue: You can start by giving him re-constructive eye surgery that will prevent him from ever having to wear glasses again, then burn him at the stake like a convicted wizard or witch.

Oak: I think he should be taken away from his dear friend Paul Schaffer put back on NBC where I think he did a much better job, then give the whole job to Conan O'Brien.

(horn blares)

Read: It's nothing but career suicide to go from 12:35am to 11:35pm back to 12:35am. I am not sure any of you understood that but… (three points to Oak; at 23, two points to Taylor; at 17 and one point to Inoue; at 18) by the way Miya-san, don't ever say that it would be a good thing to give Dave laser eye surgery. That is just wrong.

Inoue: Kari was right. You are nothing but a male chauvinist pig! You are disgusting!

Read (while flicking the bird at her off-camera): You are plain and you ought to be lucky I can't MUTE you in these rounds. What's next?

(Miyako is Michael Jackson)

Read: You are Michael Jackson. Does it appear to you that you are getting too much press over the last couple of weeks? Ten seconds each and we will begin with Inoue right now.

Inoue: Don't tell anybody this, but this is really a ploy to get back to number one again. It has been well over twenty years before I was a Thriller and truly off the wall.

Oak: Yes. Today, you claim to be truly invincible, which you are not. Sure, you made history, but you left blood on the dance floor from boys named Ben. Let's face it you're bad and dangerous.

Taylor: Michael is desperate enough to say or do anything these days. Dangle blanket from a hotel window and saying his record company is racist. All to pay off his debt.

(horn blares)

Read: It is sort of sad when you see a man like that have to make up all of these publicity stunts just to get money and hold up popularity. I think Gary made the best argument using album title to make his point, but he didn't really answer the question. (eight points for Inoue; at 26, two points for Oak; now at 25; one point to Taylor; now at 18) Miyako gets eight points for her argument. Gary, I believe you have our next role.

(Gary is Dr. Phil)

Read: Gary, you are the good doctor, Phil McGraw. Apparently, after running over and eventually killing her husband with the family Mercedes, Clara Harris held up one of your books at the small crowd chanting a séance pro-McGraw style. What does this do to you personally? Ten seconds each and we'll start with Gary now.

Oak: It has to have a positive effect in book sales, but I think people will blow it off like nothing happened. I don't even think they realize this woman did this at all.

Taylor: Many people will begin to question the validity of the claims that Dr. McGraw makes but we all know that Clara Harris probably didn't read between the lines of the book to get to the parts about talking and listening.

Inoue: Never trust psychopaths like Clara Harris to read between the line and the fine print for that matter. It will have absolutely no effect on Phil and I don't even think he knows this.

(horn blares)

Read: You know what I think? Miyako just made Tristan's entire point for him. (three points for Taylor; now at 21, two points to Oak; now at 27, and one point for Inoue; now at 27) Tristan, you have our next role.

(Tristan is the 2003 President's Day snowstorm)

Read: For those that don't know, this is the 2003 President's Day Weekend Snowstorm. You swept through the East Coast delivering thunderstorms to the south, ice, sleet and snow to the Mid-Atlantic and blizzard conditions to the northeast. Will you go down in history as one of the greatest? Ten seconds each and we will begin with our flurry of attention, Tristan Taylor (pun is intended) now.

Taylor: If meteorologists start measuring snow by the foot, then you have to be prepared for one of the more violent snows in recent history. It is enough to get kids telling their future grandkids about it.

Inoue: Why wouldn't it go down in history? You can put it right there with the ones in '93, '96, and '22 for that matter. Enough to cause carbon monoxide poisoning when you turn your car on. History is a must.

Oak: It is so much history, that the National Weather Service has begun to set record snow totals for the District, Maryland and Virginia. All of these states have already exceeded their budgets for snow before this storm.

(horn blares)

Read: It was a storm that was destined to set records in every category and it just wouldn't quit trucking. (three points to Oak; now at 30, two points to Taylor; at 23, and one point for Inoue; now at 28) Why wouldn't it be history? By the way, while I have the time, I suggest you watch one of my all-time favorite episodes from my show, "The Blizzard" unless you have been traumatized from the whole experience. I think Miyako has the next role.

(Miyako is Frenchie Davis)

Read: Miyako, you are `American Idol' reject, Frenchie Davis. It appears that `19 Entertainment' and `Fremantle Media of North America'; the people that produce American Idol have removed you from the opportunity of becoming the next person to hold that title. You appeared on and modeled lingerie on an adult web site. Co-producer Nigel Lythgoe had the excuse of American Idol taking on the responsibilities of a family show in the hopes that viewers would not be lost as the reason behind Frenchie's elimination. The money made from modeling was to pay for Frenchie's education and `19' is doing everything in their power to get Frenchie a contract outside of `Idol'. Do you think that Frenchie should stay in the competition? Miyako, you have ten seconds each starting now.

Inoue: I feel that my non-puritan act has been performed and I have no reason not to be in the competition. The only real reason I can think of is that Simon promised Nigel a night together to keep a full-figured lady off the show.

Oak: It goes deeper than that (no pun intended) Miyako. The show had a rating of `G' to `PG' and the things Davis did can go from `14' to `MA'. Though it was done for a good cause it's just the principal of the matter.

Taylor: Frenchie should have kept quiet from the very beginning about pictures. She told the producers before the show hit the airwaves that she did this act and the reasons. She deserves not to be in the hunt and she should have never been there to begin with.

(horn blares)

Read: Frenchie posed in lingerie to pay for her college education. It is a proven fact that this kind of judgmental behavior can scar a person for life. She knew full well what she was getting herself into and knowing the consequences that the producers we're willing to take to keep the show in the family. Anything they would have done probably, and this is a big probably would have been a terrible nail in the back for the `Idol' record label. But personally, I don't put the blame on anyone's shoulders because once you are a part of the circle you are never truly an outsider to the circle anymore. (three points to Taylor; at 26, two points to Inoue; at 30, and one point to Oak; now at 31) I think Tristan made that argument the clearest. Gary, I believe you have our last role.

(Gary pulls out a picture of a man that is unrecognizable to most)

Read: Gary, you are the duct tape man from Connecticut. This man who we know not by name or by age has made it his destiny to duct tape plastic tightly around the outside of his windows. When I say his windows, I mean all of them. This is to protect himself from possible terrorist attacks. But taping his house in that style can warrant possible suffocation and death. So tell me, how long will it be before you suffocate and die? Ten seconds each and we begin with Gary, right now.

Oak: Ok, just a minute. (struggling with breathing) I just need to catch my… (Falls to the floor while clutching his neck also known as the universal signal for choking. He is dead)

(Read laughs throughout the exhibition and during the parts of Taylor and Inoue)

Taylor: I will say the man has five hours to live. The first two to realize he left his children in the house with him, one to realize he will never have sex with his wife again and another two to fall asleep on the couch while watching himself on TV for the tenth time.

Inoue: I think that the man will be eaten alive by the bugs in his house. He doesn't appear to be a well-kept man and this exhibition shows how dumb he truly is by not letting the creatures out of his house before barricading it.

(horn blares)

Read (laughing in between his talking): I'm sorry, but that stunt Gary pulled… its just too funny. You had to see it to believe it! (looking serious) (eight points to Oak; at 39, two points to Taylor; at 28, and one point to Inoue; at 31) You pulled it off when you had to Gary and you and the other two panelists will have to do the same in out next round. There is no time to cram for the pop quiz, which is next.

After Round Three, the scores are:

Tristan Taylor: 28 points

Miyako Inoue: 31 points

Gary Oak: 39 points

(commercial break is taken)

(we're back on the air)

Voice Over: It's time for a Pop Quiz!

Read: Where our panelists will have to fasten their thinking caps and refer to material of this show and other trivia related to the material on the show to get their answers. I will give our panelists two questions to answer. If you get one question right it's worth four points, get both right and its worth eight points, but if both questions are wrong, you will get a MUTE and a deduction of five points. Let's begin! Trivia for Tristan Taylor. If you ever needed a miracle, now is the time for one. In a number, give me the annual presentations of the Oscars and Grammy's, respectively.

Taylor (taking a second to clear his head): 75th and 45th.

(fanfare sounds)

Read: Great job at guaranteeing yourself four points and an outside chance of going to the final round. Your second question is what reality series dealing with the subject of marriage featured names such as Rick Rockwell and Darva Conger? This is to give you a fighting chance at going to the showdown.

Taylor: Who Wants to Marry a Multimillionaire?

(fanfare sounds)

Read: Great work my friend! (eight points; now at 36) Now its time for Miyako Inoue's trivia! What German automobile designer owns the brands PORSCHE, Audi and just recently completed the acquisition of Bentley? You must answer this question correctly to advance.

Inoue (quickly answers): Volkswagen?

(fanfare sounds)

Read: You are well on your way to making it to the finals. Your second question is… (Looking at the question in hand, Read realizes that it is a question Inoue will answer correctly. He does not want Inoue in the final round because of her comments throughout the show and stalls to think up a question he knows that she can't answer)

Inoue (sing-songy): Come on Read. I'm waiting!

Read: All right! Hold your horses! Give me the exact year, month and day that NASCAR was founded.

Inoue (answers like it was nothing): February 21, 1948.

(fanfare sounds)

Read (with an anime sweatdrop on his head and a monotone voice): That is the correct answer. (eight points; now at 39) (normal voice) Although Miyako has made it to the finals and Tristan has almost overstayed his welcome, we still have to see if Gary can answer his trivia questions. (A/N: I usually do not do this in the middle of a fan fiction, but Art is correct. You will find out why this is important later in the season.) Gary, what was the 3M company's former full name without the acronym?

Oak: Minnesota Mining and Manufacturing Company.

(fanfare sounds)

Read: The second question is how many `no contests' has Mike Tyson had in his boxing career?

Oak (unsure): Three?

(buzzer sounds)

Read: Awesome job by everybody on those trivia questions. (four points; now at 44) By the way the correct answer is two. Two no contests for Mike Tyson.

(horn blares)

Read: That was the horn and it means we must bid farewell to Tristan Taylor.

Tristan's face dematerializes on the screen to his silhouette with a yellow outline.

Read: Unfortunately, Taylor was a simple pretender to the throne. Only one of our two remaining panelists will be the winner and we'll find out whom in the Final Showdown, next!

(commercial break is taken)

(we're back on the air)

Voice Over: It's the Final Showdown!

Read: The most important part of our game. We have taken points our two remaining panelists have earned out of the equation. All relevance has been placed on the shoulders of this last topic of the day. The all-star games have seen a decline in recent years. The primary reason for this nosedive is the lack of importance to the season the game entails. Your final sixty-second argument is what can be done to bring viewers back to the all-star games? Thirty seconds each and we will begin with Miyako, now.

Inoue: The way to fix the mess of the all-star game is to make up stipulations that will affect the outcome of the rest of the year. The notion to make whoever wins the all-star game in the MLB will not garner viewers. It has to be deeper than just making it affect the World Series and who gets home field advantage. You have to have a good halftime show that guarantees some of the finest recording artist of yesterday and today. Bring out the hall of fame stars to spice up the game. One change cannot make everything better all of a sudden.

Oak: You are right, but I suggest we make some changes to the games as follows. For the MLB, you should be allowed to play some previously outlined amount of time and play until there is a winner. For the NBA, make it look very `back in the day'. They did a good job of that this year and the game was awesome. For the National Hockey League, you can make the ice larger, have no fights, play with a larger puck and net to make the games have even higher scores. Finally, no matter what anyone says, you will NEVER be able to draw attention to the Pro Bowl. Hawaii is nice and all, but not many people can get there.

(horn blares)

Oak: Moving it will garner even less attention by the media.

Read: The ever too popular subject of how to get more attention to the all-star games. Giving suggestions on how to make these games better was probably the reason you won. Miyako would simply give us the primary issue, while Gary would expound on that issue with great poise and stability. Gary Oak is the winner!

(fanfare sounds)

Read: Fifteen seconds and they begin now.

Oak: Recently, America voted the Oak Tree as its National tree. With Arbor Day coming soon, help to volunteer in placing one of America's great treasures where you live. It will make all the difference for our next generation and gives this generation something to hang their heads up high for.

(horn blares)

Kari and Tristan rematerialize back on the set.

Read: You heard the horn people. That it for us this week! Join us next week when we welcome Joey Wheeler, Takato Matsuda, Misty Waterflower, and Taichi Yagami to our humble abode. For all the cast, panel and crew, I'm Arthur Read inviting you next week Around The Anime Horn!

The host and panel talk into going off the air.

(we're off the air)

Please R/R next week for Day 5: Face to Tyson and Crisis in the Clubs.