Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction / Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction / Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction / Rurouni Kenshin Fan Fiction / Fan Fiction / Crossover Fan Fiction ❯ Ginga GIRI GIRI! The Universe is in Danger! ❯ Getting on Other's NERVs ( Chapter 38 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

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Ginga GIRI GIRI! The Universe is in Danger!
By SSJ Heero
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- OPENING SONG: ZANKOKU NA TENSHI NO TEEZE (CRUEL ANGEL'S THESIS) -

zankoku na tenshi no you ni
shounen yo shinwa ni nare

aoi kaze ga ima
mune no DOA wo tataite mo
watashi dake wo tada mitsumete
hohoende'ru anata

sotto fureru mono
motomeru koto ni muchuu de
unmei sae mada shiranai
itaike na hitomi

dakedo itsuka kidzuku deshou
sono senaka ni wa
haruka mirai mezasu tame no
hane ga aru koto

zankoku na tenshi no TE-ZE
madobe kara yagate tobitatsu
hotobashiru atsui PATOSU de
omoide wo uragiru nara
kono sora wo daite kagayaku
shounen yo shinwa ni nare

---- Recap ----

[Chibi characters of the six appear in the foreground as scenes from the last episode play
in the background. Though, you can't see 'cause this is text. =P]

SSJ: LAST TIME! ON GINGA GIRI GIRI! We mistakenly try to pass through F City.

Amiko: Only to run into the infamous Daitenjin™.

Kensou: They delay us and delay us until finally Excel and Hyatt finds us and takes Davis.

TM: Then Team Voldemort comes, and SSJ and I kick their ass in a Magic game.

Davis: So after they blast off and Voldemort gets an afro, they search for me.

Cindy: We find him, and Illpalatzo pays off his poker debts.

All: Anyway! On with the show!

---- Chapter 38: Getting on Other's NERVs ----

There were footsteps. The echoes of the footsteps ran through the single hallway, barely
lit by very dim candles. Into the picture stepped Cell, fatigued and quite scratched up.
Rantmon hadn't been too pleased with the Enders failing their mission and losing Phage, at
that.

So thus, Cell went through the hall and into a giant room at the end, fabulously furnished
with empty clothes. They were frayed and dirty, shoved to the edges of the room out of
sheer laziness. Cell looked about the room and came to the conclusion to add to it. So he
went through the chamber and into a room filled with bars. It was a jail, and a few weak,
thin, and especially terrified prisoners fled at Cell's shadow.

Feeling in a rather good mood, he decided to release all the prisoners from their pain. He
opened all the doors and they rushed out into the room of decaying clothes. They froze,
realizing what was happening. Five minutes later, more empty clothes were brushed to the
side, as Cell was now suddenly energetic and strong. He flexed his muscles and clenched a
fist.

Good. He then called for his servant. A young boy with grey hair came from the other
chambers of the place. He was particularly recognizable, for he had strange red eyes.
Kaworu came and asked, "Yes, Cell?"

"They are nearing Tokyo-3," Cell simply told him. "Do anything in your power to stop them
now."

So Kaworu bowed, and Cell was left alone. His good mood soon deteriorated into utter
hatred. With a punch, the wall nearest him crumbled to pieces, a boom echoing through the
halls, and the sound of rocks banging against each other sounded throughout the room. Cell
muttered to himself, "I hate every bit of you damn kids... I'll show you how perfect I am.
Too long have you gotten on Rantmon's nerves."

***

Now, the Crew was having a swell time traveling over the plains, seeing all around them
for miles. No one could hide and ambush them, as happened occasionally before when the cops
were on their tail. Yet, now that they thought about it, they haven't encountered anyone
from the government in a while, even though Kensou was with them. "Must be my AWESOME
power!" TM rationalized.

There was a silence as everyone looked at TM out of the corner of their narrow eyes, Amiko
muttered, "...Sure. They're scared of your power."

"Of course!" TM proudly claimed, laughing wholeheartedly. "My power is to the government as
dogs are to SSJ." And SSJ threw a narrower than normal glare at TM. TM laughed, "Come on,
what kind of wimp are you to be scared of dogs?"

"Kinda like the one behind you?" SSJ just muttered in reply.

TM turned to view behind him, grinning, expecting SSJ to just be trying to fool him. Yet,
no, there was a dog behind him. Though, he couldn't see it all at once, since it was just
about fifty feet tall. The Crew turned white when it bared its fangs and let out a low
bellow. TM screamed, "NA-NA-NA-NANJA KORYA?!" (The subtitles read: "W-W-W-WHAT THE FUCK?!")

Immediately, their chocobos were dashing, Amiko making sure Tenpi was safe and snug in her
pack. They dashed and dashed as Mokona sat on Cindy's head. "Don't just sit there, do
something!" Cindy yelled at him.

Yet, Mokona didn't fly off, grow a mile tall, or anything like that. He simply sat on her
head and viewed the surroundings with a smile as Cindy yelled out its name multiple times.
Their chocobos dashed on, the various packs bouncing until Davis finally had the sense to
set the dog on fire and crush it under a meteor. SSJ sighed and sat back relaxed on his
chocobo as he glanced at TM, who was hyperventilating and shaking.

"So, who's scared now?" SSJ inquired in a mocking tone.

***

Later, their scene gradually shifted from peaceful, serene grassland to a hectic maze of
metal and asphalt that was Tokyo-3. And indeed, it was hectic, as currently Sachiel was
striking the city with its explosions. The streets were empty save for debris, the city was
silent save for the rumblings of explosions and giant robots, and the place was quite safe
save for the gigantic robot to be falling straight at them.

"DAMN!" SSJ swore.

Kensou screamed, "Chikushou!" (Subtitles: "Shit!")

"CRAP!" Amiko shouted.

Cindy yelled, "HOLY-!"

"GODDAMN IT!" cursed Davis.

TM finally screamed, "BANANA!"

Everyone then turned to TM, ignoring the metal beast still falling towards them. He
shrugged. "I haven't said much good lines for a while," he said to them.

Everyone then sweatdropped. They then dashed onward with their chocobos, narrowly missing
being as flat as a banana peel. Dust and concrete flew into the air as they dashed onward,
explosions following the purple machine. They sighed as they found one of the service
elevators leading into the shelters, opening the doors and having their chocobos slide down
the angled walls of the shaft, since the elevator was on the bottom of it.

When they reached the bottom, and their chocobos were tired from the friction, they sat
their birds down to rest and looked about the shelter, with everyone looking at them with
surprised eyes.

Davis scratched his head and sighed as Tenpi poked his small head out of Amiko's pack.
Amiko took the baby chocobo in her arms as he kweh'ed softly. And Cindy was poking Mokona
for being too lazy to save them. "Ne, Mokona!" Cindy called. "You're becoming too much like
SSJ."

In front of her, SSJ glanced back at Cindy, shifty-eyed. "Eh?" SSJ uttered.

Cindy explained, "Well, you seem to be rather apathetic and all lately. Even the giant dog
didn't surprise you!"

SSJ returned, "I'm the author, I know what's coming up."

Cindy scratched the back of her head, sweatdropping. "Oh yeah..."

So then they sighed and waited for the insanity above to end, not caring about the
whispers being spread through the room. They just lay on their backs and stared at the
ceiling. The lights were bright and the mats were comfortable enough, they thought.

But there were a group of people in there who were interested in the whispers being spread.
Or at least, one boy. In his hand was a video camera. His brown hair and glasses were clear
as he turned about the room, searching for where the rumors started. The boy proclaimed,
"This will be the scoop of the century- maybe even the millennium!"

It was definitely Aida Kensuke, who was currently literally dragging a bored Suzuhara
Touji on with him. And following the two was the classroom representative, Hikari,
muttering about how the class should stay as a group or something like that.

And when they found the Crew, Kensuke squealed with delight, "Whoa! It really is them!"

Cindy turned her eyes to the ground past her head, seeing Kensuke's video camera zooming
in on her. For some reason, she felt like it wasn't aimed at her face at all... "Hey, my
face is down here," she said to him.

Kensuke was a bit flustered, losing grip of his camera and barely catching it, but did
catch her face on the camera before they all got up and sat. Touji and Hikari shook their
heads as Cindy got up to her feet and cracked her knuckles. "You've got some nerve..." she
muttered, a glimmer of anger showing in her eyes.

Kensuke cowered in fear, putting away his camera from harm. He held his arms in front of
him in defense. "No! Please!" he begged. "Sorry! It was subconscious!"

Cindy narrowed her eyes a bit as she inquired, "Really..."

"Yes! Please, don't hurt me!" And Touji and Hikari were scratching their heads,
sweatdropping with the turn of events.

***

So SSJ yawned and placed moved his knight as Amiko looked on in preparation of her move,
Tenpi sitting on her head. TM and Davis busted out their Playstation 2, battery pack, and a
small TV, and started killing each other on Capcom VS SNK 2 again, with Touji cheering on.
Cindy was teaching Kensou the basics of Mario Kart on the Game Boy Advances, beginning a
three-way race between her, Kensou, and Mokona. And Kensuke was excitedly video taping the
whole event with giddiness, which was starting to grate on SSJ's nerves.

As SSJ rubbed his chin, suddenly, a thought came to him. He may be able to defeat Ron and
Amiko! He picked up his queen and hovered it over the general area of his target. It was
then that Kensuke accidentally knocked into the boy, making him drop the queen on a
different space, making it hilariously easy for Amiko to swoop in for a checkmate.

SSJ's eyes twitched. He clenched his fists and glared at Kensuke, eyes ready to kill.
Kensuke caught sight of the bloodthirsty SSJ, and ran back straight into TM, making the boy
lose track of the game and allowing Davis to perform a ten-billion hit combo and knock him
out. Now TM's eyes two were twitching, and both SSJ and he were ready to pounce on Kensuke,
Amiko and Davis sighing.

But suddenly, there was a loud sound and a voice rang through the shelter, "The state of
emergency has ended. Please return to the city."

SSJ and TM checked themselves and sighed, shaking a fist at the boy with glasses. They said
at once, "You're lucky."

The Crew then packed away their belongings and prepared their chocobos. Not wanting to
miss the opportunity, Amiko threw a bishie ball and caught Touji as SSJ caught Hikari,
getting quite annoyed at her yelling of etiquette and such. They left Kensuke alone, not
wanting to do much with him. Soon after they were up in the streets, dashing to the other
side of the city, heading Eastwards. But lo, there was a small problem with their leave,
seeing as a balloon suddenly dropped from the sky and hit the ground just before them.

They all saw the shape of a basilisk in the remains of a hot-air balloon, as it shifted
this way and that. Finally, out came a hand and Voldemort pulled himself out, afro and all.
The Crew sighed, "Yare yare..." (Subtitles: "Geez...")

Voldemort swore and cursed as he pulled himself from the wreckage, then caught sight of
the Crew. He immediately got to his feet as the rest of his team came and supported him.
They stood in position, standing in a cool pose as speed lines appeared around the screen.
Then it went quiet. Team Voldemort said nothing as they held their cool pose, nor did the
heroes, who were busy sweatdropping to say much.

Finally, Voldemort kicked Ma, who then remembered to bring out a CD player. He pressed the
"Play" button, and immediately a chorus resembling the Team Rocket theme sounded.

Voldemort began their motto, "To send the world to devastation."

Peter continued, posing up a storm and showing off his metal arm, "To make minions of every
nation."

"To strike down the lameness of self-insertion fics!" Malik proudly stated, twirling his
Millenium Rod.

"To kill you all just for kicks," said Bakura, combing his rich white hair.

And so they went through all their names in dramatic fashion. The Maze brothers then struck
a pose as well. Voldemort shouted, "Team Voldemort is blasting off at the speed of light!"

Peter, Malik, and Bakura rhymed, "Surrender now or prepare for our bite!"

The Maze brothers chimed in, "Ma-Ze, damn straight!"

And by now, all of the Crew had sweat drops bigger than their entire bodies. They just
stood and stared, wide-eyed, as Team Voldemort held their ridiculous pose. So time passed,
and they all stood without moving. Except, TM was eating a banana that he randomly had,
waiting for the time to pass.

But being the average, lazy American that he was, instead of disposing of the peel
properly, he tossed it on the ground. And as Team Voldemort broke formation, Voldemort
slipped on the peel, causing the whole group to crash, hit an important gas pipe, and
causing a giant explosion that sent them back the way they came. They yelled in unison as
they flew towards the sky, "Team Voldemort is blasting off agaiiiiinnnn..."

And with a bling and a sparkle, they were gone. The heroes stood, not quite sure what to
make of what just happened. But they had little time to wonder, as they immediately got
going again.

They headed for the exit, only to catch sight of it. The wind stirred. Dust flew. Something
was there. Between them and the exit was a large crater for where Sachiel exploded. They
swore, seeing that the walls were much to steep for the regular chocobos to pass.

Then there was a sight to see. All about them, the ground rose. Rectangular and square
pieces rose from the ground. They saw the windows and realized, no, the ground wasn't
rising. Buildings were appearing out of the ground, coming up from the Geofront below.

It was a sight to see, indeed, as the sun flew high in the sky, the city suddenly appeared
from the ground.

There was the screeching of tires. The chocobos were led off the streets as a truck drove
itself around the corner and pass them all. In a brief glimpse, SSJ caught sight of a
familiar grey haired boy. Kaworu. He screamed as he pulled out his hair, "Wait, this is too
early! What the Hell is going on?!"

TM and Amiko nodded. SSJ looked in the direction of the truck, and they all stealthily
followed after it.

Well, as stealthily as they could on giant yellow birds.

***

So they then were at the doorsteps of a gigantic pyramid amid an underground space- the
Geofront. Davis approached giant double doors and was about to knock, if not for the doors
opening and three children appearing- Shinji, Rei, and Asuka. SSJ, TM, and Amiko noticed
Asuka. She was here too early!

But TM especially noticed Asuka, leaping off his chocobo and shifting into "Stud" mode. He
was right next to her in an instant, hand around her waist. He began, "So, beautiful, how
about a-"

BAM! He was flying fifty feet into the air as Asuka passed, hardly breaking a sweat as TM
hit the dirt with a painful thud. Ayanami followed with a dull stare as Shinji looked back
at the pain TM endured. So the three Children passed, and the Crew went to TM and helped
him while suppressing their laughter. They dusted him off and brought him to his chocobo,
where they all dismounted and led their birds into the building.

They stepped through the halls, wandering onward, lost within the maze of corridors and
rooms. It was bright with the metal walls reflecting all the light multiple times. The Crew
wandered on, trying to find the reason of Kaworu being here prematurely.

Suddenly, the room was bathed in red light. Alarms rang through the building. A voice rang
through the speakers that sounded awfully like Misato Katsuragi. They heard it.

NERV was under attack.

***

Just a mile away from the pyramid, there were the Children, hiding among the tall grass
and plants as they saw what was taking place. Cars came from nowhere and skidded to a halt,
with many, many armed men dashing out and raiding headquarters. Shinji swore, "Damn it!
They're taking over headquarters!"

Asuka threw down her school bag swearing, slapping Shinji over the head. "Then come on,
idiot!" she shouted. "We're gonna get to the Evangelions!"

So Asuka dashed first, Shinji following close behind. Rei sat there, staring at the scene
unfolding, then at Asuka and Shinji a distance away. She got to her feet and followed after
a moment of deliberation.

***

The Crew was now surrounded by a mix of dead or unconscious bodies as they fought through
wave after wave of enemies suddenly pouring into NERV. They fought their way left and
right, struggling to find safe haven within the trembling pyramid. Bullets flew at the
Crew. TM, using his new powers, deflected each and everyone individually, seeing each
bullet's own blurry trail.

The army was taken aback, but could not respond as TM closed his eyes quickly, muttered
something, and suddenly they were in a very dark place, outlined in white. TM screamed his
attack name, "MISUSE OF SHARINGAN! For the next year, you will do nothing but play ELMO'S
LETTER ADVENTURE!"

There was a scream throughout the army. They were tied to chairs with a TV outlined in
white before them, Elmo speaking his demonic language. Their torture was truly horrible as
they bounced left and right searching for that elusive letter S.

When TM was done, the army before him collapsed onto the floor, defeated and completely
reverted back to first grade education.

And during that, Amiko and Cindy were taking out men left and right with their dual Chibi
Storm, the army flying about as they smashed into their opponents. Pain filled their
enemies' bodies as they crashed this way and that. Amiko and Cindy threw them all away,
ending their combo with a giant attack with fans.

SSJ, Kensou, and Davis were taking their opponents the easy way- bowling. Davis gracefully
twirled his bowling ball on his fingers and rolled it towards his opponents, causing them
to collapse in one straight line. SSJ tossed the ball, not rolling it, at his opponents,
causing a much more desirable effect of having one of the army men feeling a terrible pain.
Kensou, not knowing much about bowling, dribbled the bowling ball off the hard metal floor.
Just above the doorway, he saw a hoop randomly put there. He leapt, holding the ball in one
hand and floating in a Kobe Bryant-esque way. He slammed it into the hoop, the backboard
shattering upon impact, and the bowling ball fell and took out the last opponent rather
painfully. Davis commented, "Eh, that's not bowling, Kensou."

SSJ added, "That'd be basketball."

So five minutes into the raid, it was over. The Crew sighed and continued onto where
Kaworu might be. Then they heard gunshots.

They sprinted onwards, leaving their chocobos to rummage through the downed army's items.
They came to a room with a look for, which TM easily kicked open. The gunshots stopped, and
they all caught sight of Misato Katsuragi, facing Kaoru and a moving Eva-02. The robot
moved and caught sight of them. SSJ muttered, "Damn."

"This'll be hard, eh?" TM commented. SSJ nodded.

Misato diverted her attention just a bit towards the suddenly arriving Crew, but that was
enough for Kaworu to raise the evangelion's hand and send it smashing down on Misato. Smoke
and debris filled the area, and when it cleared, TM was seen holding up the eva's arm,
Misato on the floor staring up at him.

SSJ cursed, dashing forward and leaping onto the eva, then towards Kaworu, giving the angel
a good punch to the face. It echoed through the area, allowing TM to shove the arm away and
take Misato back. "Come on, better me than him," he told her.

Before Misato could reply, like a true gentleman, TM captured her and kept her safe inside
a bishie ball. SSJ came back and landed beside TM. "Looks like some hard work," TM muttered/

"Indeed," SSJ replied.

But no, it wasn't their work at all. From the room next door, there came a smashing of
metal, and the wall tore asunder. Out came Eva-01, quickly repaired from the previous fight
despite it taking place just an hour before. It smashed into Unit 02 and shoved it away.

Then there was a ring of a bell. The Crew turned to their left and found Asuka holding a
bell, ringing it as a wrestling match. Asuka yelled in a voice like a fighting game
announcer, "Round one. FIGHT!"

The Crew facefaulted, but got up to view the ensuing fight. Shinji and Kaworu circled each
other, preparing to trade blows. Shinji leapt forward in his robot, Kaworu blocking with
the red one. They went this way and that, never hitting one or the other. Then Kaworu
grabbed Shinji around the gut, hugging him tight, and then flipped over, pulling off a
German Suplex on Shinji's poor spine.

Kaworu got up with Unit 02 and laughed at Shinji. That surely should have shattered the
boy's spine.

But no, Shinji got up, surprising Kaworu as he performed a ten-billion hit combo upon the
unsuspecting angel. Kaworu yelled as Unit 02 was also hit with a Super Hurricane Kick, Unit
01 twirling around and kicking it. Shinji finished it off by grabbing Unit 02's arm and
tossing it away. "JUDO FLIP!" he exclaimed.

That was it. Kaworu couldn't get Unit 02 up for Round Two. He stared at Shinji and yelled,
"Impossible! That should have shattered your backbone!"

But then TM interrupted, "What backbone?"

Shinji then ejected from his Eva and stared Kaworu in the face. Shinji added, "He's right.
I'm just a spineless dork, so your German Suplex has no effect on me!"

Kaworu cursed, and was about to do something else to stop the Crew, but then Cindy threw a
bishie ball and caught Kaworu. Everyone looked at her before she grinned and replied, "I'm
sure they'll take care of him just fine."

So all that was left was Asuka, Rei, and Shinji facing the Crew with a partially destroyed
headquarters and zero coherencies in the chapter. So then the Children sighed. "I'm tired
of fighting Angels," complained Shinji.

"I need to rest," Asuka muttered.

Rei was silent for a bit. She glanced at everyone, and in the subdued tone, she went, "Yay."

So it was settled. Amiko took Shinji along as SSJ took Rei and Davis took Asuka. TM was
swearing at Davis for a bit, but then decided he'd rather not deal with Asuka's fists of
fury again. So then they sighed once more. "Writing this chapter is getting on my nerves,"
SSJ muttered as he turned to the rest.

"Then end it," Amiko replied with due logic.

"But I need a decent way to fade out." Tenpi responded by pecking SSJ on his head. SSJ
sighed, "Okay, okay. I'll end it..."

So the Crew was away from Tokyo-3, continuing along their path. They sighed as for finally,
the day was ending and they could rest a bit. As Tokyo-3 faded into the landscape, they
passed many small towns and villages.

As they passed the last village into the plains, they didn't fail to miss a flyer stamped
onto a wall.

"Concert! Babes from the Outlaws put on a show! Mabase!"

But neither Amiko nor Cindy recalled putting on a show at all. They scratched their chins
and thought a bit about the situation. But arriving to no simple explanation, they decided
to draw their own conclusions. With Davis' consulting, they turned South a bit, towards
Mabase, and to a rational explanation.

---- To Be Continued ----

- ENDING SONG: FLY ME TO THE MOON -

Fly me to the moon,
And let me play among the stars.
Let me see what spring is like on Jupiter and Mars.
In other words, hold my hand!
In other words, darling, kiss me.

Fill my heart with song,
and let me sing forever more.
You are all I long for, all I worship and adore.
In other words, please be true!
In other words, I love you!

---- Preview ----

[Japanese Yu-Gi-Oh! Preview music plays in background. The six appear as chibi style, and
random scenes from the next episode play, though you can't see because this is text. =P]

Amiko: What's with the incoherency in this chapter?

SSJ: I hadn't come up with stuff before writing, so all of it was making it up as I went
along.

Amiko: Man, this chapter is a real sucker, then.

TM: And with a great anime, too. I hate you, SSJ.

(SSJ sunk in the corner of the screen, muttering to himself about how he's overworked and
mistreated, needing worker's benefits and such. Amiko and TM facefaulted.)

Davis: Now, now, what about the next episode? You know, a relevant one with guitars?

Cindy: Does it involve pirates?

Kensou: I think it does.

All: Next! On GINGA GIRI GIRI! "A Detour in Mabase"

Amiko: You're running out of ideas for titles.

SSJ: Shut up.

----