Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Fall of the Mighty ❯ Confusion and Uncertainty ( Chapter 7 )

~Grouchy and Unshowered~

Here I am again. My significant other is trying to make me clean the house and my so-called bestfriend is trying to make me go to one of the brat's birthday parties. I also haven't gotten enough sleep which is obvious. I need a nap and a shower and a new/clean house. I only barely passed my exam even though I was certain that it was the simplest test I had ever taken and I have no money which is a real *itch because I WANT TO GO SHOPPING! I haven't been able to get any exercise while I've been babysitting and feel like a lazy slob which means I don't want to exercise anymore and I won't pass my physical exam when the time comes. I am trying to go on a diet while I'm not exercising but my dad brought home every flavor of Oreo's and ice-cream you can imagine and I WANT THEM but my tooth hurts and I know that if I eat any it will make it even worse! I need a stopwatch that will stop time so I can get things done. I want a beer but if my significant other knew I wanted one he would condemn me to hell and damnation. Just a couple of beers won't kill me, damn it!! AAAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway… I'm glad you have liked my story so well Chibi Hoshi, I hope I don't disappoint you. Sorry if the last chapter got sorta confusing at points. I don't have that much experience or imagination with lemons. Yes, I did kinda throw them into it but it was taking soooo long for me to get past details and stuff that I just said "Screw it!" and so Vegy did. Well, for this chapter, back to angst! Sorry.

~Collapses Moaning Onto Keyboard~

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Goku laid back down and snuggled up to the prince again, not knowing what to say. They slept for a time and Goku woke to a cold and empty bed.

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*Confusion and Uncertainty*

Leaning up it took a few seconds for him to remember where he was. It all came back to him and he searched for Vegeta hastily. When he found the room empty and no sign of the prince's ki his chest constricted painfully. 'He's gone.'

Goku sat up, the sheets sticking to his skin, and put his face in his hands. 'He's gone.'

After a few shaky breaths he stood and pulled on his pants. Suddenly a large towel slammed into the side of his head hard. "You're not going to walk around like that are you?" Standing in the doorway, Vegeta looked mildly disgusted. When the shocked surprise on Goku's face registered Vegeta's eyes narrowed. "Is there something wrong?" The big man turned sheepish. "Uh, I thought you'd gone." Vegeta frowned. "This is my island, why would I leave?" Goku didn't answer. "Why did you think I had left?" The earth raised Saiyan fidgeted. "I couldn't feel your ki."

I always keep my ki hidden when I am here and I expect you to do the same. My time here is private and I prefer that the others don't disturb me." Goku nodded. "I ask again, why would I leave?" Goku shrugged unwilling to make eye contact. "The bathroom is at the end of the hall." When the big man looked up Vegeta was gone.

The prince's face was unreadable. 'Does he really see me that way? I leave him alone for a few minutes and he's convinced that I've abandoned him.' Vegeta paused as he stalked through the complex. 'Hn. Perhaps I should remove myself for a while.' He turned and exited the building.

Goku stepped into the bathroom to be met with a warm, moist haze. 'So this is where Vegeta was.' He felt a sting of guilt for doubting the prince so readily. As he scrubbed himself clean he couldn't help replaying the events that took place that afternoon. It felt like a dream but he'd never had a dream go quite like what had really happened. His body tingled as he remembered what Vegeta had done to him, with him. Never in a million years would he have ever thought that this would even happen, much less the way it had. He pressed his forehead to the cold wall and groaned under the cascade of water. Glancing down he suddenly saw a vision of dark amused eyes starring up at him and groaned again. 'Wow, I should really get my mind onto other things.' He picked up a bar of soap and stared at it for a second. 'This is going to be difficult.'

A short time later Goku exited the shower, dried hastily, and headed back to Vegeta's room feeling overly stimulated and unsatisfied. His pants were much too tight for his liking. Vegeta was nowhere to be seen and he had no way of finding the man he so decided to explore some.

The prince laid on a large rock in the twilight. He wasn't far from the compound, in fact he was still in sight of it. Lost in thought he stared rather vacantly. He supposed he had gotten a little carried away with all this. He hadn't thought through the consequences. That baka always seemed to know just the right buttons to push. Oujisama! He couldn't believe how weak he was that the mere utterance of his proper title would reduce him to such a state. He had been so taken that all he wanted was to draw it out of those lips again and again. It thrilled him because he knew that Kakarott was sincere, that and the fact that the Saiyan hadn't expected anything from him because of it. The shock and surprise in the man caused his blood to boil. Kakarott had turned to putty in his hands, completely enthralled, totally his. The prince didn't lie when he told the big man he'd never had a lover before Bulma, though he had much *training*. He was among the strongest of Saiyajin but he had still been a child and there were many other races aboard Frieza's warship that had greater abilities than his own. He had to survive as best he could in the hands of the strong, especially after they learned of Saiyajin healing capabilities and how he would come from the regen tank stronger than when he went in. His existence had been little but pain since before he could remember. It was a means to an end and a show of strength…but he did not need to show Kakarott strength. He'd had to assert so much control to keep from hurting the innocent, and he'd taken advantage of that long past training in an effort to give him pleasure. He'd never done that before. He'd never gone out of his way to pleasure anyone. It had always been forced or painful. That was why he had risen so swiftly in the ranks of the army, his body seemed to barely keep up while his life-force shot up in order to ensure his survival. Then Frieza noticed him again and took him as his favorite. Kami! How Vegeta hated him! One thing was certain. Vegeta did not hate Kakarott. Kakarott was among the few individuals that the prince had little wish to be cruel to anymore. Could he do this? He wasn't sure when he started and still didn't really know. Could he do this with Kakarott? A little late to ask that now.

At the compound behind him he heard the door open.

Goku stepped out into the twilight. This place was astounding. It wasn't very big but he had gotten lost three times already and accidentally found his way outside. So, instead of blundering around some more he breathed deep the fragrant air and looked for a place to sit and enjoy the evening. Ahead about twenty yards a huge, jagged boulder jutted out of the ground. He headed for it absently while glancing at the vegetation all around. When He reached the rock he immediately scrambled up the side to find Vegeta reclining flat on his back and watching him expectantly. "I thought you couldn't find me." Goku had to wrench his eyes away from the sight of Vegeta's relaxed figure laying there before he could answer intelligently. "I…I can't. I didn't realize you were here. Sorry if I bothered you." Vegeta only studied him so he started to climb back down. "Sit." Goku smiled and settled himself close by Vegeta who continued to study him. Goku was still a mass of bruises, his bare chest showing green, black, and blue and one temple was an angry purple. The prince realized that he hadn't actually looked at the man since long before their fight. He'd been too wrapped up in his own problems. Even after everything that Vegeta had done, not just the last few days but ever since their first meeting, Kakarott stood by him selflessly and patiently. Kakarott was always there, always ready to give his undivided attention. Vegeta never understood it until now. He and Kakarott were two sides of the same coin. He'd always seen that but until now they had been separate, there had been a barrier. Vegeta had destroyed that barrier. He had allowed a connection to be made and there was no going back. At this point the prince wasn't sure he wanted to go back. Goku grew restless under Vegeta's watchful gaze. That was to be expected and probably wouldn't change anytime soon. The ouji reached a hand to hover above Kakarott's discolored chest but couldn't bring himself to touch the other man. "You could use some time in the regeneration tank yourself."

Goku was unsure what was going through the prince's mind. His mind, on the other hand, was circling around how good Vegeta looked stretched out so relaxed and open. The prince was lost in thought, barely even blinking. All Goku wanted to do was touch him. Then Vegeta reached out, stopping an inch from his skin, and showed concern for him. He looked at the hand. His ouji seemed so hesitant when just a few hours ago he had been passionate and fiery, dominant and in control. Goku wanted to reassure the prince somehow. He reached to grasp Vegeta's hand but paused. "Can I?" The question startled the prince who said nothing. He grasped the hand and pressed it to his chest. Vegeta laid still, watching him, wondering what he was going to do. Goku inched closer, drawing the hand up his chest and throat until he could nuzzle the palm. In the closeness Vegeta suddenly became uncertain. Still holding the hand to his cheek, Goku reached his other hand toward Vegeta's chest. The prince caught his wrist, keeping it at bay while he looked up with curiosity and unease. The larger man remembered how his hands had been restrained and batted away earlier. He moved closer, not attempting to free his arm. He wanted to touch the prince. He leaned in and nuzzled against the flesh of the prince's throat, feeling the other man's pulse quicken and breath hitch. He breathed deeply the clean soapy scent of Vegeta's skin and hair and noticed him stiffen slightly. Goku drew back to meet the prince's eyes which glittered intently. "Are you alright?" Unblinking, Vegeta gave an abrupt nod, not relaxing in the least. The larger Saiyan leaned in again, not breaking eye contact. "Can I?" Again the question surprised the prince who made no response. He kissed the prince gently and grew bolder as his ouji began to respond. Slowly the prince's hand slid from Goku's and into his hair, gripping firmly and drawing the bigger man to him. Goku pulled away to meet that glittering gaze. "Let me touch you." Vegeta's eyes widened showing sharp anxiety for an instant. Neither man moved for a while until Vegeta finally blinked. Goku felt the grip on his wrist loosen.

The prince's mind spun wildly. 'What have I done?!' He had just lost control, he'd given it away! He swore he'd never lose control and yet he just gave it away at a mere entreaty. Now he had to take what came next, now he had to accept the consequences. He forced himself not to flinch when fingers caressed his cheek and closed his eyes as they wandered over his jaw and down his throat. 'Just finish it quickly.'

Happy at Vegeta's quiescence Goku explored down the prince's firm chest. Through the shirt he felt finely chiseled muscles twitch under his light touch. Continuing lower he slid his hand beneath the cloth to caress toned abs. Vegeta shuddered violently and leaned up, stripping off his shirt to reveal his perfect frame. Goku admired him before looking up to find Vegeta's eyes still closed and his face holding a very neutral expression. "Vegeta?" The big Saiyan reached out to cup the prince's cheek. "Vegeta, look at me." He complied. "What's wrong, Vegeta?" The prince's brows drew down as if he did not understand the question. "Do you want me to stop?"

"Why would you stop?" He finally replied. Now Goku was confused. "I would never force you to do anything you don't want." Vegeta's eyes narrowed. "That's not true." Goku had to think for a second. "But that was for your own good. This is different. I would never hurt you. I could never do anything to hurt you. Will you trust me?" Vegeta regarded him with black eyes. 'What more does he want from me? I've already given in to him. I've accepted this. I've… I've given him control. What more is there? Trust? Does he just want to hear the words? I suppose I can give them to him.' There was still uncertainty in his eyes. "I…trust you." He lied. Goku studied him. "Then don't close your eyes. Let me love you." Vegeta stopped breathing. 'Love?' He then nodded submissively. Goku drew him up to a sitting position and pulled him close, pressing their bare chests together. Vegeta's lips parted for him and their tongues intertwined. The bigger man relished the feel of the prince pressed against him and caressed him lovingly. The smaller man's hands grasped Goku's shoulders lightly. This was very different than before, the prince was giving Goku complete freedom to do as he wished. The large Saiyan gasped for air, breaking the kiss and turned his attention to his lover's throat and chest. A very light purr flowed from him offset by occasional tiny growls as he licked and nipped. Vegeta closed his eyes tightly at the feel of teeth grazing his collarbone, opening them again when he remembered Kakarott's admonishment. He hadn't uttered a sound so far. 'He wants me to watch?' The prince shivered while Kakarott's hands explored his contours. 'Why torture me? Prolong it? Just do it. Get it over with.' Strong hands gripped his ass and Vegeta found himself in Kakarott's lap. The prince huffed breathily as the other man's arousal ground against him. His lips were again taken in a kiss and Goku moaned into him. Then the taller Saiyan pressed him onto his back, his body weight holding the prince down. Vegeta's breath came faster and he forced himself to stay still. It would only be worse if he struggled, he knew that. 'Here it comes, don't…'

"Oujisama."

Vegeta blinked when Kakarott rolled to the side and snuggled against him, one leg and arm thrown over his chest and thighs. 'What? Why…?' He was perplexed at first then relaxed into the embrace. 'Fool.' He thought to himself without malice. 'How could you think such things of Kakarott? He's too stupid to realize the kind of power he holds over you or how to use it.' He sighed in relief and turned to face away from the other man who spooned against him. After a few minutes Goku whispered into his ear. "Hey, Vegeta?" "Hn." "I'm starving." The silence was broken by a loud rumbling that vibrated the prince's back. "Baka."

They ate silently, Goku was packing away at least one quarter of Vegeta's store of food. The prince watched him in disgusted fascination. Goku finally noticed. "Aren't you gonna eat, Vegeta?" The prince started then pushed away his plate. "I've lost my appetite." He stood and walked out. Goku promptly dropped his food and went after him. "Wait, Vegeta! I'm sorry. I know you hate it when I eat so fast, I'll slow down." Vegeta glanced over his shoulder. "As much as your table manners disgust me, I really don't care right now."

"Then why are you running off?"

"I'm not running from anything! Go eat! Leave me be!" Goku stopped, watching the prince walk away, then turned and went back to the kitchen unhappily. Vegeta entered his room and was hit by the scent of sex and Kakarott. With a growl he snatched the sheets off the bed and into a pile where he torched them with a small ki blast. Opening a window he leaned out to take a deep breath of fresh air. In the distance he heard the crash of ocean waves and it served to sooth him. 'What am I doing? I'm making a fool of myself. How can I be so weak?! At least I am in control. I won't lose that again.'

Goku finished his food and stood to go search for Vegeta. Something was wrong and it bothered him greatly. He hoped that Vegeta didn't regret what they'd done but what else could it be? The prince had been so docile outside. Not unresponsive but certainly not eager like he'd been before. He'd been so tense but answered when Goku asked for his trust. The tall man paused, remembering flat black eyes accompanied by those words, 'I…trust you'. Vegeta told him a great many things over the years and he'd always believed them. Goku shook his head in frustration remembering another time years ago when Vegeta had said exactly what he wanted to hear. The prince then knocked him senseless when his back was turned and took off, ending up killing himself to defeat Buu. 'How can I be so gullible?' The realization that this was not the first time Vegeta had tried to kill himself was not comforting either. 'Wait a minute, why would Vegeta lie about that? What would he get out of me thinking he trusts me? He wouldn't be worried about sparing my feelings, he's Vegeta. He said I had to remember that.' Goku frowned as thoughts fluttered through his head almost faster than he could grasp them. 'Vegeta is Vegeta. Vegeta never lets anyone get close. Vegeta never shows anything but strength. He's always in control. He always knows what's going on. He's never tender. He's never…docile.' The frown on his face melted into a look of horror. 'He always thought I would take Frieza's place as…' Goku didn't even want to contemplate what the ice-jin used to do to the prince. When Vegeta had first come to Namick those other aliens had treated him with such distain and contempt. At the time Goku couldn't fathom how the prince could kill them all without so much as a twinge of guilt. Now he thought he understood a little better. They all brought it on themselves. And now…after all this time he and Vegeta… Goku's eyes widened and his jaw dropped. 'Does Vegeta think I would do that?! That I could…' :::He glanced up to see closed eyes and features devoid of emotion. "Vegeta? Vegeta, look at me." Those eyes opened slowly, almost glaring at him. "What's wrong, Vegeta? Do you want me to stop?" "Why would you stop?"::: "Oh no…" 'I can't let him think that. How can I show him it's not true?' Quickly Goku exited the kitchen, he had to find the prince. Just as he rounded the corner he slammed into something hard. "Gha!!!" Vegeta stumbled backwards from the impact and Goku grabbed his arms, keeping the ouji from falling. The bigger man hoped he'd only imagined the flinch when he caught hold of Vegeta but the prince's expression proved him wrong. He wore a cornered look that quickly turned to rage and he ripped away from Goku. "Kakarott! Watch where you are going, you idiot!" The taller Saiyan was wide-eyed and stuttered slightly. "I'm sorry, Vegeta. I didn't know you were there. I'm really sorry. Will you forgive me?" Vegeta looked at him like he'd grown horns or something. "Get over yourself, baka. It wasn't that bad just don't let it happen again." Vegeta glared at him some more before turning away. "Come." Goku followed, still trying to think of a way to approach the prince about what was happening between them. "Strip." The command startled Goku from is thoughts. "What?"

"Take off your clothes, baka." Goku found himself in front of the regen tank with Vegeta eyeing him with exasperation. "Oh. I'm okay, really, Vegeta. Just a little sore but that will go away soon enough."

"Don't argue, just get in." The prince snapped. Goku sighed and obeyed. Once inside Vegeta stepped in with him and fastened the breather into place for him, concentrating solely on the device. "Relax." The prince stepped away and programmed the machine. Liquid flooded the tank turning the world green and Goku watched Vegeta leave the room. 'Relax.' The same thing he had said when the prince had taken him. How could it be that he trusted Vegeta whole heartedly despite everything the ruthless man had done and was capable of doing but Vegeta couldn't trust him? He supposed he would have plenty of time to think about it now.

Vegeta entered his room and stretched out upon the cleanly furnished bed, relieved to be alone for the night. He just stared at the ceiling for a while feeling numb inside. 'Shit.' That one word seemed to sum up everything. 'Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.' He took a deep breath trying to expel this grating anxiety but it stayed with him. His body started twitching with tension and it drove him insane. Snarling loudly he swung to his feet and sent his fist smashing through the wall. Kami! He needed to destroy! He needed to hurt something! Instead of doing those things he began to pace the room like a cagged animal. He needed to be calm. He needed to think rationally. He wanted to just disappear. 'Damn.' Why was this so difficult? Time was supposed to heal wounds but in his lifetime Vegeta had found that it only amplified and heightened fears. 'No! I am not afraid! I am not weak! I have proven that! I can handle anything. I can handle this.' He stood in the center of the room. 'I can handle this.'

So how many of you know what this feels like? Am I still doing okay? I know it's starting to wind down a bit but nothing lasts forever. I'm running out of ideas to keep going. We'll see how the next chap goes and if everyone feels the need to violently reach out and touch the author, who knows, I may come up with a way to continue rather than just an ending. Maybe I'll think of a bit more. If you would like to suggest something I am still open.