Fan Fiction / Zoids Fan Fiction ❯ Bandits ❯ Bandits ( Chapter 1 )

Millerna: Oh lord, Erin.

HealerAriel: What?

Millerna: Come on. The Zelda characters, the Animorphs, and the Harry Potter characters weren't enough for you? You have to screw up the lives of the Zoids twips too?

HealerAriel: I'll have you know that I will do nothing of the sort. It's just that...watching Zoids makes me get very emotional.

Millerna: Uh huh. This would be why you scream "Kiss her, kiss her, kiss her!" at the screen whenever Van and Fiona are alone in a scene?

HealerAriel: Yep. And why I always bad-mouth him when he doesn't.

Millerna: ...Yet you won't let me and Link make out?

HealerAriel: ...Oh shut up. The fact is, EVERYONE wants to see Van and Fiona get their groove on. Same goes for Bit and Leena, although I'm more concerned with the Guardian Force characters at the present time.

Millerna: Why?

HealerAriel: 'Cause that's the series that's playing now ^_^;

Millerna: Flighty fan-girl.

HealerAriel: Horny psycho-bitch.

Both: Whoa, that was good!

(A/N- Blame my little brother. He's gotten me so hooked on Zoids! (Besides, anime guys don't come any hotter than Van, Irvine, and Bit ^_^; Oooooooh, and today's the episode where we get to see Van with his shirt off! Oh baby! Ahem. Sorry 'bout that...) Anyway, I figured I could write a Zoids fic. And dammit, I'm makin' Van and Fiona kiss! Hee hee, eventually...Van's got some nice abs, by the way. Oh-so sexy! And this is sort of how Zoids would be if it were in the Adult Swim lineup. Occasional curses and all.)

"You'd think she'd be able to come up with a new song," Irvine grumbled, as Moonbay began to sing her theme music again. For the thirtieth time that night, in a voice just as off-key as it had ever been.

"Or at least some new verses so it would be less repetative," Van agreed. Moonbay either hadn't heard, or decided to ignore them both, because she continued with all her heart and soul,

"I AM A...TRANSPORTER...OF THE WASTELAND!" and so on and so forth, until all of her previously established lyrics were sung, and she had to begin again from the start. Fiona was being her normal, quiet self. She was also riding with Moonbay at the time, which was strange, considering the MONSTER crush she had on Van. Too bad the boy was oblivious to it, as far as she knew. Anyway, a few minutes of Moonbay's somewhat less-than-angelic voice later, the girls got one of those shibby little speaker messages from Van, saying that a military base not far off had just been robbed.

"Let me guess," Moonbay mused, "they want us to track down the thief."

"More or less," he replied.

"Did they clue you in on what the thief took off with?" she asked. Irvine laughed.

"Believe it or not, a generous portion of the base's food stores," he said, still chuckling. "Doesn't sound like a real bad guy to me. Just hungry."

"Well, the good news is, it's obviously not anyone we know," Van said. "Somebody like Raven or Hiltz wouldn't waste their time on food."

"They would if there weren't any restaurants handy," Irvine said.

"Oh, very funny," Van shot back. "Either way, we have to be on our guard for the- WHOA!" A large black Zoid had just zipped right in front of him.

"Who wants to bet that that's our guy?" Irvine offered, gleefully readying himself for a fight.

"Hmm...must do this kind of thing all the time..." Moonbay said as they chased after the suspect's Zoid, which could now be distinguished as a much lighter, sleeker version of the Liger type.

"What do you mean?" Fiona asked.

"Well, think about it; his Zoid's built for speed, plus it's jet black. Not only would he be able to make a really quick getaway, but he's damn near impossible to see in the dark. Perfect for someone who lives by stealing." Fiona nodded.

"Yes, that does make sense," she said.

Van, meanwhile, was getting very frustrated. The thief's Liger was much faster than his, and he was pulling farther ahead. Even Irvine wasn't half as fast as the black Zoid. Then again, Van decided, Irvine wasn't exactly trying very hard - he was staying at an easy lope.

"I say we let him go," Irvine chuckled. "The guy's not doing any harm taking a pizza or two, after all."

"No way," Van said stubbornly, lowering his guns. "If I can't catch him, I'll stop him!" He locked the guns onto the enemy Liger and prepared to fire.

WHAM! Something huge had powered itself into him, knocking him off balance. His missiles shot straight into the sky as he fell over. The rest of the company came to a complete halt as a new Zoid positioned itself between them and the black Liger.

"Don't you mess with him!" a female voice commanded viciously from the cockpit of the black Command Wolf. This Zoid, too, was built more for speed than for battle. Obviously the two were a team of sorts. Van cocked his guns again, but before he could shoot, the enemy pilot fired a few shots of her own at him.

"I mean it!" she yelled. "Leave my brother alone!"

***

"Your brother is a thief, ma'am," Van said.

"Don't you "ma'am" me, you moron!" his opponent snapped. "Not everyone's as well off as you Guardian Force dickheads!"

"Hey! Watch it with the dickhead stuff!" Moonbay said, sounding somewhat amused nonetheless. "There happen to be two girls here, too!"

"She just called me a dickhead, and you don't care?!" Van raged.

"Cool it, Rambo, I was just making a point," the enemy informed. Irvine was suddenly overcome with a fit of laughter.

"WHAT IS SO FUNNY?!" Van yelled.

"Y-You are kind of trigger-happy, there, partner," Irvine managed, before cracking up again. Now, however, Moonbay joined in, and Fiona giggled. Van let out a roar of anger, which only made everyone laugh harder.

(A/N- and, as this is modeled after a cartoon, we now, with no transition whatsoever, cut to Van and company sitting around a fire on the ground.)

"I don't trust them," Van said, poking a stick into the flames as they waited for the thief's sister to catch up with him and bring him back.

"Lighten up," Moonbay said, leaning back with her hands behind her head. "The girl's funny."

"Watch, as soon as we go to sleep, they'll rob us blind," Van grumbled in all pessimism.

"Have some faith, Rambo," the cocky female voice from before said. Van turned around, and was shocked to see that she couldn't have been a day older than sixteen. The boy who came up from behind her was taller than her, but unmistakably in his early teens.

"Y-You're just kids!" Van exclaimed.

"Impressive kids," Irvine added. The two teens smiled brightly at the compliment, and sat down with the rest of the group. The girl tossed a canvas bag to Moonbay.

"Dinner," she said, grinning. Fiona began to laugh.

"You know what I just realized? We haven't even been properly introduced yet!" She gestured to each of her comrades in turn. "This is Moonbay, Irvine, Van, and I'm Fiona Alisi Lynette. But, just call me Fiona."

"I'm Alandria," the girl said. "And this is my little brother."

"Mercutio," the boy added, pointing to himself. Van found it hard to believe that Alandria's little brother was so much taller than she was, as the bag of stolen bounty was passed around the group.

"Then we have one thing still amiss," Moonbay said. "Why do you guys steal food?" Alandria took a huge bite out of a chicken leg before responding.

"'Cause we don't have any money to buy it," she informed, still ripping at the chicken as though she hadn't eaten in days. And, judging by the way Mercutio was shoveling food into his mouth, they probably *hadn't* eaten in days.

"That's not really what I meant," Moonbay clarified. "I meant, why are you kids out here by yourselves stealing things? Where are your parents?" Alandria and Mercutio exchanged dark glances.

"Our parents..." Mercutio's voice trailed off. He tried again. "They...they were in the war when we were little. They didn't come back."

"We lived with foster families for a few years, but..."

"We sort of..."

"Ran away," Alandria finished. Van and company were silent.

"Oh my God," Fiona said after a few moments. Alandria's grin reappeared.

"Please, stop with the pity," she said. "We do pretty well for ourselves."

"Have been for the last six years," Mercutio added.

"You've been rogue thieves for six years?" Van asked incredulously. Alandria and Mercutio grinned.

"We prefer 'bandits,'" they said in unison.

(A/N- Well, any good? You love it, you hate it? Tell me.)