Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ Final Fantasy: The chronicles of Four! ❯ The completion of a side quest and realizations of a new problem ( Chapter 9 )

The last chapter made me laugh so hard, I think it's time to continue the craziness! But first… (opens mailbag) Chad, I doubt the world's going to implode. If it was, it would've done so already. Glazy, I'm not quite sure how they'll get back either. I do have a few ideas in mind, though… Anyway, as always, I don't own FF or 8-bit.

 

---

 

Black Belt and Fighter sat outside the destroyed ruins of what was once a happy, merry, little town. Snow was everywhere, logs were astray, phone polls were broken, basically everything was screwed up.

 

“Good going, Fighter. Now where are we supposed to hang out?” Black Belt asked, kicking a snowball. Fighter looked around.

 

“We can…” Fighter began as he looked at Terra's bar, “Oh wait, I destroyed that…”

 

“You destroyed everything!” Black Belt cried, “We're stuck in the middle of nowhere because you were trying to woo a girl who hates you!” He and Fighter continued down the cold, lonely street of Cherry. Snow began to drift, which somehow made Black Belt feel nostalgic and think about his old dojo. But sadly, he'd been thinking so much that he smacked into a wall.

 

“OW! What the…?” Black Belt looked up, “What is this?”

 

“It's a tower! A big, beautiful tower! We're saved!” Fighter said, hugging the wall. Then he began to dance around happily, “We're saved, we're saved! Saved, saved, saved, saved, saved!”

 

“SAVED FROM WHAT!?” Black Belt asked, “If you haven't noticed, there's nothing to be safe from. It's a cold, lonely town. No one's out here.”

 

“But it IS cold. I bet there's a fire inside!” Fighter exclaimed, and ran into the tower, knocking the door off its hinges as he ran. Black Belt sighed.

 

“I remember when life was… quiet and peaceful. Then HE came along…” Black Mage said bitterly, walking inside.

 

---

 

Meanwhile, our heroes were waiting outside a boat store. Red Mage was reading an old Nick magazine, and White Mage was window shopping. Black Mage was kicking a can around, getting very edgy.

 

“I don't understand why we're here.” Black Mage stated. White Mage looked away from a dress display towards him.

 

“In case you forgot, you broke our boat, remember?” White Mage explained, a sweat drop over her head, “So we need to get a new one to return to Matoya's cave.” Red Mage looked up from his magazine.

 

“Well, I wouldn't worry. Thief is in there, so how bad can it get?” he asked.

 

“Oh, it can get pretty bad…” Black Mage replied, a streak of blue appearing across his face. Red Mage put his magazine down and took out his Brady Games guide.

 

“I'd disagree. If you look here, it says the thief has the highest Charisma skill of ANY class! And shopkeepers dig charisma!” Red Mage explained happily. Black Mage took the guide, rolled it up, and smacked it across Red Mage's head.

 

“Stat bonuses and skill points my foot!” he spat, “This is THIEF we're talking about! Next to you, he's the one who'll probably get us killed on this stupid quest!” Just then, Thief walked out of the store, and he certainly didn't look happy.

 

“Bad news, guys…” he said, walking up to his friends, “They just let the last boat off. Unless we can find another dragon or pay someone to take us, we're stuck here.” Black Mage threw his staff down and pointed stiffly at Thief.

 

“SEE!? I told you he'd be the one to get us killed!” Black Mage screamed, “He's a curse!” Black Mage began to hyperventilate, and his eye started to twitch crazily, giving him that freaky mad scientist look. Then White Mage smacked him over the head with her hammer. Black Mage fell with a thud.

 

“BM, why don't you curl up in a corner and take a nap?” White Mage suggested bitterly, “This isn't Thief's fault. It's yours.” Black Mage got up quickly, and stared at her with a stupid expression on his face.

 

“My fault? Why would this be my fault?” he asked, shocked that anyone would blame him, although everyone DID blame him.

 

“Because you broke our boat!” Thief exclaimed defensively.

 

“Do you have any proof that I did it?” Black Mage asked. `Maybe if I play dumb like RM does, they won't think I had anything to do with that piece of crap sinking… even though I did. Hehehe…' Black Mage thought. Thief raised an eyebrow, and Red Mage handed him a slip of paper.

 

“Well, according to RM's note, you threw the steering wheel at his head!” Thief replied, “Not to mention you kicked the railings off, stopped RM's work towards the anchor, threatened to zap us all, and ate the last can of baked beans!” Black Mage glared at Red Mage, who smiled nervously.

 

“Yeah, I might have mentioned lightning, but can you blame me for the baked beans!?” Black Mage cried, “I was hungry! It was either the beans, or I cook you two idiots up and eat you.” Black Mage pointed to Thief and Red Mage. White Mage rolled her eyes.

 

“Idiocies aside, we're still stranded.” She stated, “Let's not dwell on the past. We need to find a way off this continent and back to Pravoca.” White Mage began walking towards the port Mat had dropped them off at.

 

“I think WM is right.” Thief shrugged, and followed White Mage.

 

“I'm sure if we look, we might find some of the ship parts and make some kind a vehicle to bring us back.” Red Mage added, and walked out of the town as well. A sweat drop appeared over Black Mage, and his eyes narrowed.

 

“Maybe if I'm lucky, I'll have a sharp piece of metal I can jam into your head.” He muttered, and followed the others at a safe distance. When he got to the beach, he saw White Mage and Thief digging in the sand, as Red Mage fished for something in the water. Thief grinned and waved as he saw Black Mage, who in turn waved back, although he wasn't quite as enthusiastic about seeing Thief.

 

“Hey, BM! You're just in time!” Thief exclaimed.

 

“And just what the hell are you doing!?” Black Mage asked, looking suspiciously at Red Mage. Red Mage stopped “fishing” and walked over, trying to wrangle the water out of his hat.

 

“We found a part of the engine to the ship, and I'm sure there might be more here.” He explained, “Thief said he already found a piece of wood.” Black Mage sighed.

 

“Do you even think? We can't rebuild the ship, and even if we could, it would just break down again.” Black Mage stated, and for once he didn't sound angry or annoyed.

 

“I know that! But if we find enough materials, we might be able to build a raft.” Red Mage replied, showing Black Mage the blueprint he made for a simple-looking raft. Then he went back to his work. Black Mage looked at the blueprint, and then at everyone else.

 

“I already have enough materials for a raft…” he mumbled. `A human raft, anyway. Well, I might spare WM. She's kind of nice. But if I find some rope, I'm DEFINITELY tying Red Mage and Thief together. They should be strong enough to hold me up as I float gently back to Cornelia. Screw this save the world crap.' Black Mage thought to himself again, grinning psychotically.

 

“BM, are you okay? You've been twitching and grinning oddly all day!” Thief exclaimed, sounding a little worried. Black Mage shook out his evil plans and smiled a fake reassuring smile.

 

“I'm fine, Thief! Just thinking about… an idea for the raft!” Black Mage blurted out, then cursed himself. White Mage looked up away from the sand.

 

“You have a suggestion?” she asked.

 

“Uh… yeah! Our raft will need a sail.” Black Mage replied, nervously.

 

“That sounds like a good idea. We'd need to catch the wind somehow.” Red Mage agreed. Black Mage smiled again, although he wanted to throw up for being so nice.

 

“I'll go and get the sail!” Black Mage said, and quickly ran off the beach back towards Elfheim. `Grrr! Why didn't I just blast them all and make a raft out of them?' Black Mage asked himself, getting into another mental argument. Then he began to wonder why he was in a mental argument against himself in the first place. As he thought, Black Mage walked back into Elfheim, passing by the orphanage.

 

“Let's see… I told those buffoons I'd get a sail… Hmm…” Black Mage looked around and spotted a blanket inside the orphanage. He grinned evilly as the new thought occurred to him.

 

“If I steal that blanket, my problem's solved! But my stealth points suck…” Black Mage said, then wrinkled his nose, “Great, now I sound like RM.” He shrugged and peeped his head into the window, and nearly screamed.

 

“Where are all these damn Wizards coming from!?” Black Mage hissed, looking around. Wizard kids were everywhere, eating snacks and playing with toys.

 

“Now, what happened to them all?” a White Wizard asked a Shaman.

 

“It's amazing, really. They all escaped a fire, but their parents were fried to a crisp!” the Shaman replied, “But no one knows who did it!” Another sweat drop rolled down Black Mage's face, and he quickly snatched away all the blankets he could.

 

“Well, they'll be safe here. It's a good thing we've gotten all these blankets! It's supposed to be freezing tonight!” the White Wizard exclaimed, walking over to the blanket box. Black Mage quickly shuffled away towards the beach.

 

“AAAAH!! Where are all of the blankets!?” the White Wizard screamed, “The children will freeze! Why, God, why!?” All Black Mage could do was giggle as he broke into a run.

 

Back at the beach, the three had found enough wood to make a raft, and now Red Mage was building a sturdy raft for them to ride in. Thief made a pole to put the sail on, and White Mage began to shape the oars. Black Mage walked towards them with his usual confidence and threw the blankets on the beach.

 

“Not only did I get a sail, we have bedding too.” Black Mage stated proudly. White Mage sniffed them.

 

“They smell like baby powder.” She said simply, looking at Black Mage suspiciously. Thief picked one up and examined it.

 

“Why does it say “Property of the Little Folk Orphanage?” Thief asked, just as suspicious. Black Mage began to sweat. He had to think of a lie, and fast!

 

“They gave me those!” Black Mage replied, “I told them they should be used for the children, but they just said they had more than enough! But those poor children! At the hands of murderers!” Black Mage pretended to cry as White Mage put her hand on his shoulder.

 

“We should go and take care of this right now!” White Mage said firmly, and walked towards the gate. Black Mage's eyes widened as he saw his plan blow up before his eyes. He walked over and blocked White Mage's path.

 

“We shouldn't go back there!” he exclaimed, “These guys were psychotic! They were nuts!” He moved his arms frantically to show what he meant. `Oh man, I'm so screwed…' he told himself. White Mage passed him.

 

“I doubt we'll have a problem.” She said. Black Mage looked and saw the orphanage workers walking towards the beach.

 

“Guess what? TIME TO GO!” Black Mage yelled, pushing White Mage, Thief, and Red Mage onto the raft. Then he took the oar and paddled off shore and into the unknown. After a few minutes of silence as Black Mage paddled down the sea, Thief started to whine nervously.

 

“BM, are you sure you know where you're going?” Thief asked. Since they pushed off the Elfland beach, they hadn't seen any signs of civilization. But then again, they hadn't seen any signs of monsters either. Black Mage wiped his forehead and turned to face Thief.

 

“No, and I don't care. I just want to get off Keebler's Island as soon as possible.” Black Mage replied in frustration. Thief shrugged and continued to count how much gil they had. Red Mage took out his game guide and flipped through it for a map.

 

“That stupid book won't help us out here, you nimrod! Give me that!” Black Mage snapped, grabbing the Brady Games book and throwing it into the sea. Red Mage chuckled, and scoured the area.

 

“That isn't a problem anymore!” Red Mage exclaimed, “I see a patch of mold over there!” Black Mage quickly looked and blew up the rock which held said mold.

 

“Not anymore.” Black Mage said, as everyone watched the fire crackle and burn with extreme delight. Red Mage fell to his knees and began to cry. He even took off his hat, and blew his nose.

 

“Are you not mad? You've destroyed our only guide through here! We're helpless now!” Red Mage exclaimed through sobs of tears. Black Mage sighed, and choked back angry screams of rage. White Mage also seemed annoyed, but she found a more positive way to deal with it.

 

“RM, think of it this way. If we're in the unknown, we'll get stronger! The experience we get from both fighting and the vastness of the world will make up for the guidance we lost.” White Mage said comfortingly. Red Mage immediately perked up.

 

“Well then, I say full speed ahead!” he exclaimed cheerfully.

 

After about two hours, Black Mage found his way to the Cornelian Bridge dock, to his dismay. The foursome got off and soon were walking through the forest back to Matoya's cave. Oddly enough, they hadn't run into any monsters.

 

“Okay, I've heard of a break, but this is just weird.” Black Mage said, and looked behind a tree, “Where are all the monsters?”

 

“Maybe they're all sleeping. It IS a Sunday, after all.” Thief stated. Black Mage found a stick and hurled it at Thief, hitting him in the head and making him fall into a mud puddle.

 

“Thief, just shut the hell up.” Black Mage commanded angrily. After a few more minutes, they finally came to the pathway leading to Matoya's cave. Black Mage grinned and ran up to the cave door, only to scream with utter rage and hatred.

 

“BM, what's wrong?” White Mage asked, “Did you get hurt?”

 

“I HATE THAT OLD WOMAN!” Black Mage shrieked, kicking and screaming. Thief walked up to the door, read the note that was on it, and laughed.

 

“I told you it was a Sunday! Don't you know that no one does anything on a Sunday?” Thief asked. Black Mage grabbed the note and ate it, then he started to bang on the door.

 

“Hey, old lady! Get up! We have your stupid Crystal! OPEN UP NOW!” Black Mage yelled, “Fine, have it your way!” He stepped back and aimed a fire spell. Then he threw it towards the door, which knocked it straight off its hinges. Smirking proudly, Black Mage stepped inside, and beckoned for the others to follow. When they came into Matoya's room, they saw her napping on her bed. Black Mage crept closer to her.

 

“WAKEY, WAKEY! EGGS AND BACEY!” Black Mage yelled as loudly as he could. Matoya woke up with a start and fell off the bed. She stood up, grumbling angrily.

 

“What are you all doing here? Can you not read the sign I put outside!?” she asked, straightening up her bed. Thief rubbed the back of his head.

 

“Well, we did, but then BM ate it.” Thief replied. Matoya fluffed up her pillows, then turned back to the heroes, placing her hands on her hips.

 

“I see. Now that you've disturbed my nap, what do you want?” she asked. Black Mage held out the Crystal.

 

“Here. Here's your stinkin' Crystal. Can we please just have our reward and get out of here?” he asked, annoyance ringing clear as… well, the Crystal. Matoya tilted her head in thought, then snapped her fingers. She ran into a back room and came out holding a small bottle.

 

“Ah! I know! This will help you!” she said, and gave Black Mage the bottle. He examined it skeptically, then frowned.

 

“A potion? We go traversing through marshes and old castles for a potion!?” he asked, a growl emerging in his voice.

 

“Not just any potion! It's called a Jolt Tonic, and it'll wake anyone up! I'm sure you passed the Elf Castle and saw the sleeping prince, right? Well, give this to him, and he might be able to help you all find the first fiend of the elements.” She explained. Thief, Red and White Mage smiled approvingly at the reward, but Black Mage was furious.

 

“WHAT!? That's our reward for nearly getting killed? Another piece of information I don't want to hear!? That's almost like no reward at all!” Black Mage whined, clenching his fists and shaking with rage, “And are you telling me we have to go back to Elfland now?”

 

“Well, how else are you going to wake up the Elf Prince?” Matoya asked.

 

“BUT WE DON'T HAVE A BOAT ANYMORE! OUR RAFT IS PROBABLY OGRE CHOW BY NOW!” Black Mage screamed angrily. Thief patted Black Mage on the back as White and Red Mage said goodbye to Matoya.

 

“We'll just have to go back to Pravoca and buy a boat. I'm sure that old pirate is still there, maybe he has another boat he can lend us!” Thief suggested happily as the four emerged back into the sunlight. Black Mage hung his head.

 

“Oh joy… Let's just hurry. I'd like to keep my sanity until we get to the first fiend where I can release all my anger on it and kill it with one fell swoop.”

 

---

 

And so, our heroes have completed their very first side quest! But can they get a new boat? Will BM keep his sanity like he wants? And what'll happen to Fighter and BB now? All will be answered next chapter, so click that review button!