Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ The (shinra) office ❯ day 25: is insanity contagious? ( Chapter 25 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

I do not own final fantasy, progression of a mad hatter, Mr. clean, or peanut butter. Well, maybe a little…
Day twenty-five: is insanity contagious?
 
Danielle stared at Vincent, glaring actually…
“…That's really unnerving.”
 
“That's because it's working.” Danielle glared harder. (Tee hee… harder)
 
“Or…because it's really creepy.” Vincent signed the last few papers and shuffled them back into their folder, and into the outbox. Thank god it was casual Friday- other wise he would be miserable, and choked by his tie… or pants. Depends how the day turned out…
 
“So… still crushing on the mental patient?” she of course, meant angel.
 
“So… still crushing on the dumbass?” Vincent sneered, if there was anything he had learned from working at this hellhole. It was that you could never talk to anyone without knowing how to fight him or her, it was a dead end job, and it would probably get much worse in no time…
 
And then mister clean walked in!
 
“Hey, Danielle, do you really think angel is a safe choice to represent shinra corp. at the upcoming meeting?” Danielle looked outright appalled. She stood up and pointed a finger at him, looking like she was about to tell the man off…
 
“…No.” and sat back down, sipping at some coffee.
 
“…Is insanity contagious around here?” Vincent mouthed through cupped hands. Rude shrugged. Who knew what could happen around the office anymore.
 
“Come on… she's not that—“Danielle!” angel ran into the office holding an orange and a jar of peanut butter… this could not be good.
 
“A- Angi?”
 
“The spoons are after me! I need you and the others to get inside this orange!” angel placed the orange in rude's hand and started to look around suspiciously. “I'm going to make a lamp out of cinnamon buns—that should buy us some time!”
 
“…Angel… is there something wrong?” Vincent dared to ask. (How did he fall in love with this chick in the first place?!) He was taken aback when she started to sob…
 
“I've been having an affair!” with Vincent? “…With this jar of peanut butter!” angel then threw the jar over her shoulder and immediately returned to normal. “But It's ok, cause I can glow in the dark now, so our problems are over!” she grinned, then looked at the floor and glared fiercely at rude. “Oh, I see the floor is here—typical!” she said storming out the door.
 
“…Ok. Ok… I'll go.”
 
“I love you square face!” angel smiled; obviously her plan had fallen perfectly into place… Danielle threw the stapler at the door, but just missed her head. “Maii staplr… I believe you has it…”
 
“I swear to god- I will hurt you.” Danielle growled. She then turned back to Vincent. “She does something every year… but that wasn't completely terrible.”
 
“Tank you.” Danielle then stood up and grabbed rude's gun. You know, for a secretary temp, she was pretty quick. (Heh. Walker Texas Ranger, I know you're thinking it…)
 
“I'll beat your ass—“ha! That's what she said!” angel slapped her knee in an over the top gesture. The old time expression `that's a knee-slapper!' instantly came to mind.
 
GET OUT!” Vincent repressed an obnoxious snort as rude peeled her death grip from his poor gun. She sat, now breathing heavily. Oh those guns… they're quite the workout. Lift. Aim. Shoot… better then eight-minute abs! That's right. Shade-san endorses gun exercise. Especially for small children—go ahead and put in your mouth, it tastes just like candy and joy! (Hehehehe, that aught to take care of a couple…)
 
“…So? When's the wedding?” Vincent batted his eyelashes like a doe while Danielle glared venomously. “should I wear my tux?” he gasped, waving his hands around like a tween girl at prom. “we could do each other's nails!” he grinned. So he was utterly miserable, and the potential love f his life would never be his. At least he could take it out on his co-workers…
 
“I took out the bullets, melnick.”
 
“I hate you rude.”
 
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the phone rang, Reno, usually the unpopular one, having no actual… straight/normal/human/living… friends, was not expecting anyone to call him.
 
“for the last time, stop narrating my life!” Anna stuck out her tongue and stormed off to find someone else to patronize. Reno squirmed anxiously, head snapping in either direction, making sure the coast was clear. “hello?”
 
“neo.”
 
“sorry, wrong number.” And slammed the phone back onto its hook, and went back to whatever the hell the guy does during daylight hours. Probably downloading porn.
 
And then the computer exploded.
 
I wish. The phone rang again… “hello?” Reno answered again. (…that's kinda a given, don'cha think?) “Reno…listen carefully, they're coming for you.”
 
“who—“don't ask. Just go.”
 
“where—“did I not just say…?! Grab your cheetos and the flowers from the vase outside. You'll need them.”
 
“puffy or crunchy?” Reno opened both drawers, one on either
 
“both.” Reno grabbed the cheetos, ran out his door and grabbed the flowers. (this is on his cell phone, believe it or not) he jogged to the elevator, and ignored the stares of the other workers… you know, the ones no one cares about? Yeah, those guys… oh, and intern. “what now?”
 
“press all the buttons, we can't let them know what you're doing.” Reno, being as easy to lead as a brainless sheep, pressed every single button. He was about to reach for the emergency button, but he was told otherwise. “no Reno. That's bad. Never press the red button.”
 
“what now?” he glared at the others. Who know thought him to be full-blown loco by this point, or just really, really creepy.
 
“Get off on the first floor.” Reno slipped out just as the doors closed, while the other employees agreed that he was a goddamn idiot. “you see the brunette at the desk? Give her the flowers and repeat after me exactly…”
 
---
 
Danielle was covering for the secretary again- how many days had she been out now? She counted out the days to be a month… that couldn't be right… she was broken out of her train of thought when Reno came up running to the desk and handed her the flowers from the sixth floor. And two bags of cheetos, And a cell phone?
 
“Violets are blue, roses are red, and these are for the girl, with a flaxen-colored head… give her the flowers. No. do i—oh!” Reno handed Danielle the flowers and went into the second verse. “you and me, we're meant to be, so may I please, see you home, I promise, I'll never leave you alone…” Reno had an odd look on his face, as if he had no idea what he had just said…
 
“…Reno? Are you trying to ask me out?” Danielle said, completely serious- she hadn't dated since… shut up.
 
“…yes? I mean- yeah.” The two stared in silence for a moment, before Reno whispered- “this is when you're supposed to answer.” Danielle quickly realized and nodded her head.
 
“oh, yeah, sure- I'd love to. Tonight?”
 
“Friday, casual. I'll pick you up at six.” Danielle nodded slowly while Reno backed up into a plant, then got up and raced to deliver his cheetos.
 
Danielle giggled and fainted.
 
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Vincent signed some more pages, finally finished with his work. He sighed- getting up, he stretched facing the window. Loosening his tie, he watched a hawk circle overhead. Lucky jerk. He didn't have to deal with paper work or office romance… he couldn't help but imagine himself as the hawk- Dante would probably be a cougar, if he could attract such a woman as Angi.
 
“but what would Angi be?” he wondered aloud, not noticing the figure behind him until he started to laugh.
 
“a fox. At least, that's what I think.” The cougar- ahem, Dante stood smiling. His hair looked lighter… almost… silver? He shook his head, laughing it off cheaply. That was nearly accurate… (silver hair *hint hint* not sephiroth *hint hint*)
 
“sorry- day dreaming.”
 
“no problem. I think that's the best kind of dreaming, personally.” Dante sat on his desk, admiring his office, Lucifer strolled in and hopped up to vincent's desk, purring at his friend. Personally, Vincent was surprised that Lucifer wasn't rubbing up against Dante. But this was quickly explained.
 
“that cat doesn't usually like many people. Very cautious.” Vincent sat down, while Lucifer hopped right in his lap and started to rub against his hand. “most people being me and everyone else. You two seem to get along just fine.” Dante smirked. Lucifer curled up into a purring ball, making sure his new source of attention was immobilized.
 
“hm. like his owner.” Vincent, being
 
“…Angi sleeps on your lap?” Vincent went red. Dante's lips curved back to reveal a wolfish grin. Vincent shook his head long before he started to object.
 
“no- that's not- it's not- I would never- you see-“ Dante laughed even harder now, tears at the edge of his eyes. Vincent slammed his head into the desk. Lucifer purred contently. Dante patted him on the head, while Vincent mumbled curses into the mahogany.
 
“I'm just kidding, kid- relax.”
 
“I'm twenty-eight.”
 
“damn you're old.” Dante laughed, making Vincent, obviously, like a giddy school girl. “Hey, you're old-“ “omg, liek, you're the best! Omfg!”
 
“damn, you're so mature…I bet Angi's just crawling all over you- huh?” okay, he wouldn't lie. A bit of bitterness in there- no big deal, he'd just—
 
“ha ha ha, yeah, she's a wild one. I won't lie.”
 
…MOTHERFU—
 
“lovely.” Vincent groaned, while Lucifer played with his tie. Then choked him- no, we are not going to make a relationship comparison. I think it's painfully obvious that the one love of his life had already stabbed him in the back and hung him to…
oh godammit. Not again…
 
“yeah- but, to tell you honestly, it's going to get worse before it gets better…” Dante said with a face of stone. Vincent, suddenly a huge draft out of nowhere, shuddered. And panicked slightly. The man had holsters at his sides- what did he do for a living exactly?
 
“Dante…” Lucifer hopped to the desk as vincent stood. “who are you?” Dante smirked, narrowing his eyes- he started to reach behind his coat, flashing a gun with words enscribed on the side. “wouldn't you like to know valentine…” he whipped out something inhumanly quickly and spun around. “hey baby.” Dante was holding a rose, to angel who-holding Lucifer on her shoulders-laughed and took it. Vincent calmed.
 
“talking to Vincent?” angel seemed to growl out through clenched teeth.
 
“just telling him to keep up the good work.” He smirked again, and brushed past her slightly coldly, but she just kept her mouth to the rose-taking in the alluring scent it brought- and watched him from the corner of her eye.
 
“watch the cat—“wha—shit!” there was various hissing, and Vincent could have sworn he saw her smile… and some smoke. Oh, good. He was catching the “office-locos” Dante steadied himself on the doorframe and finally left.
 
“…hey angel.” Vincent looked at her with deep crimson colored eyes. Darker then agael's but still very red. Angel kneeled down so she was at level with him, head gently resting on his desk.
 
“hm?” she cocked her head like a dog. Or maybe she was trying to look down his shirt. (coughshirtcough)
 
“is insanity contagious?” angel laughed until she started to cry.
There ya go. Some BIG hints in this one… don't catch on too quick though… the beginning scene is from “progression of a mad hatter” check it out. It's amazing.