Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ Heartache Every Moment ❯ Visiting Freedom ( Chapter 2 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Haru is committed to the asylum with Kyo. Kureno, thinking in an act of kindness, gets them roomed together. Yeah... that's great...

1.) TPF: http://www.mediaminer.org/fanfic/view_st.php/90007/

2.) BBO: http://www.mediaminer.org/fanfic/view_st.php/85919/

Anime/Manga: Fruits Basket Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Psychological / Romance / Angst | Type: Continuation | Uploaded On: 03.11.2005 | Pages: 11 | Words: 12.4K | Visits: 298 | Status: Completed

Heartache

Every Moment

Disclaimer: Don't own Furuba.

Authors: Aubreys_Master and BizarreLoveTriangle{s}

Stuff: Named after HIM's `Heartache Every Moment'.

Summary: Sequel to `Being Broken Ones'. What happens in the asylum.

Link:
1.) TPF: http://www.mediaminer.org/fanfic/view_st.php/90007/
2.) BBO: http://www.mediaminer.org/fanfic/view_st.php/85919/

Chapter 2: Visiting Freedom

Like he had since he'd arrived, Haru took the medicine given to him without complaint. He was still hoping that the damn things would actually work. He didn't particularly enjoy being unhappy ALL the time. He still wanted to talk to Kyo, though. He wasn't sure if what he had to say would make things better or worse, but he felt like he needed to try SOMETHING, or it would all just slip away, like water through a sieve before he could catch it, or even notice.

The feline had no such intentions. He hummed an eerie little tune to himself from where he saw sitting propped up against the corner on his 'bed' looking at the ceiling as if there was just something SO very interesting up there. When in reality it was white. They didn't even have the decency to put some texture on the ceiling. It was just white, white, white. And flat.

"I love you, Kyo." Haru informed him softly, finally, once they were alone again. "I always have--I always will--and nothing that can happen is going to change that." The red head giggled at him without actually dragging his eyes down from the ever so amusing ceiling. "I know you don't believe me." Haru stated, still feeling rather tired from his less than minor meltdown in his shrink's office. "But--it's true--and, I am SO sorry for hurting you so much--again and again."

"Over and over again." Kyo sang the little sang gently and continued to, for the most part, ignore Haru.

"I'm sorry!" Haru repeated, just a bit louder, feeling his stupid emotional volatility about to break--again. "I-I'm sorry--I'm sorry!"

Those pretty red eyes darted down and over to him. "Hush, Haru-Haru." He crooned. The ox was being fairly obnoxious.

"I'm sorry." Haru repeated again, though it barely came out a whisper this time, as he moved forward, reaching for Kyo at the same time. To hug him or touch him in general. "Kyo—please--I love you--I'm sorry, I love you! Please don't do this--I'm sorry!"

The cat's gaze dropped down to where Haru was touching him. Then his eyes dragged coolly back up to face him. A few seconds later and without warning he began a forced tantrum. He wasn't really that bothered, but he yelled as loud as he could, he needed the nurses to hear. He kicked and screamed and in general made a lot of noise until someone came and got him out of here. Of course the silly people would sedate him first. Then Mr. Rick carefully put the needle back into his apron and scooped up the limp cat with an odd look at the ox.

"No..." Haru mumbled shaking his head, and feeling the surge of ANOTHER meltdown in the works. "No... Kyo, please... no...!"

"He'll be back after a few days in solitary." The big nurse informed him in a deep voice. Then he headed out the door since Nurse Susanne was holding it open for him. When he was out of the way she peaked in and inquired if Haru was okay.

"I fucked up so badly." Haru mumbled, trying not to loose it and get his point across at the same time. "Again and again--and I keep hurting him."

The nurse gave him a sympathetic look. Damn the nurses and their sympathy! She also made a mental note to try a different drug on the ox. Maybe some liquid crack would brighten him up?

Well, Haru pretty much ignored her, after her initial inquiry, and just moved over to his bed, put his brake on, and drug himself actually into it. He was exhausted due mainly, in part, to having just completely screwed any hope--his relationship had had--over.

***

That little disturbance warranted Kyo three days in solitary confinement. Haru was gloomy and the nurses did up his medicine a bit. But Kyo was a little ball of sunshine. Even as he was brought back to his room.

"You behave now." Mr. Rick murmured from the doorway when he let Kyo back in the room.

"Uh-huh." The cat chirped. "Is Agnes gonna come soon? I'm re~ally hungry."

"I'll tell her that." The big man promised as he shut the door. Haru was back in that `if he didn't say anything he couldn't mess anything up mindset', and didn't say anything. (His shrink hadn't exactly appreciated him throwing an absolute hissy fit on him, during their session after Kyo had freaked out, and then renewing his silent treatment. He hadn't let it up with anyone there since.) Not, as if Kyo would notice. His silence pleased the pretty kitty, actually. The point of getting into solitary was to get away from the ox, and make him see that Kyo wasn't quite interested in his bull shit right now.

When Kyo returned, Haru tossed an, apparently disinterested look over his shoulder, carefully hiding any sadness from his gaze, before turning back over, and continuing to stare at the wall. Akito had known this would happen when he'd arranged this. Haru was fucking sure he'd known. He always seemed to know! Why else would he put him here? Because he is fucking crazy? Maybe? Either way, once Agnes showed up the red head bounced up to his feet and his nurse took him off to get food. After his solitary he was feeling decidedly less adverse to the nourishment again. Well, that was an upside, Haru supposed, looking over his shoulder again, to watch Kyo go. Maybe if he was really quiet he could watch him, and keep him safe--without pissing him off further. That seemed like a good plan. No talking. Just, leaving each other the hell alone.

***

Then a few days later Agnes appeared to take Kyo away as usual.

"Are many of the others out there?" The feline inquired innocently, rocking back and forth on his feet a little.

"Yes," The lady nodded. "Everyone but the people in solitary are out in the cafeteria and recreation room for the day."

"Oh," The kitty frowned a little before whirling around and going up close to Haru.

"Come with me?" He whimpered pitifully. "I don't want to be by myself with them."

Haru raised an eyebrow at him, pondering his words carefully, before speaking up at last. "You're talking to me again?"

"I don't want to be by myself with them." The red head repeated his look changing just a little bit to--something else. Agnes was still waiting impatiently by the door.

"That's not what I asked." Haru pointed out, with a small frown. "Are you going to throw another hissy fit on me, next time I tell you the truth about something?"

Kyo blinked at him naively. "Of course not."

"Right then. " Haru agreed slowly, still seeming cautious. "I'll go--I guess." His cousin looked slightly triumphant and they got him all settled in the chair then Agnes walked them both to the cafeteria. As she'd said it was more full than usual. Crazy people just everywhere. Kyo shrunk back a step so Haru was in front of him. Haru sighed, and stopped his chair right there, glancing over his shoulder at Kyo with another raised eyebrow. "You sure you want to walk?" The cat pouted a little. He didn't want to. But he was going to have to if he intended to get food and he was hungry. "Cause, you don't have to, if you don't want to." Haru continued, still slowly. He didn't want to mess up, yet again. He just wanted to fix what he'd already broken, twice. Kyo gave him the oddest look thus far. Then he tentatively stretched out his hand and patted his soft hair carefully.

"I'm fine." He chirped with a smile before resetting his pace again.

Goddam it! Haru raged internally. There had to be someway to fix this! Maybe? Hopefully? Either way, he set off after Kyo again. After all, the reason he was there was because his kitten hadn't wanted to be alone.

***

Once he had his food finding a place to sit in the currently crowded cafeteria was a bother. No matter where he sat, one of his less than pleasant inmates was nearby. The feline ended up at the very end of on table, pressed as far away from them and as close to Haru as possible. He ate quickly with the occasional uncomfortable glance at the babbling idiots surrounding him. Haru didn't make any move to touch him, though. Whether comforting or otherwise. Considering the previous time he'd touched Kyo, he'd thrown a flat out temper tantrum.

Someone else was happy to though. One of the various insanity cases came over and hugged him murmuring about having not seen him in so long. Kyo squeaked unhappily and quickly wiggled away from him, he grabbed his tray and ran off in the direction of the drop off. Calling out his excuse softly as he fled. Haru shot a sharp look at the man, though he didn't actually say anything, before heading off after Kyo. That WASN'T Kyo being happy.

***

The red head rubbed his arms in irritation on the 'safe' side of the room after he'd dropped the little plastic tray off with the ladies who worked in the cafeteria. He was going to go back to get Haru in a minute, but then the ox came after him.

"I'm gonna go wait for Agnes in the hall." He explained his plan to the other with a small smile.

"Right." Haru nodded, still following Kyo out into the hall. "Are you alright?" He wanted to know, worried. The older Sohma had his composure back now, if you could call it composer, and he giggled softly.

"Yep." He cooed out.

"If you're sure." Haru relented finally. Yeah, he had a pretty damn strong feeling that touching Kyo would be very bad at this moment. The last thing he wanted was for Kyo to freak out on him again.

***

That stupid nurse appeared and was surprised they were waiting for her. But she just shrugged it off and took them back to the room. Upon returning Kyo bid her good-bye and scuttled over to his bed to lie down under the covers and potentially sleep. Sleeping was one of the very few things they could actually do in this damn place. Haru sat there, in the middle of the room, once they were alone again, considering if he wanted to go to Kyo or not, eventually deciding against it. So, he did that whole braking his chair, and pulling himself into his own bed thing. (He wasn't sure why, maybe he'd take a nap himself. But not before talking to Kyo, and risking more hissy fits because, that was apparently what he was good at.)

"Do you hate me?" He wanted to know, almost absently. The cat shifted and looked at him carefully. It seemed like a silly question to him. Of course he didn't hate the ox. It felt like the ox was the one who hated him with all of his 'it hurts to be around you, you're not who I fell in love with' crapola. Then he felt guilty afterwards and went on his 'I love you' crusade. When, in fact, that wasn't how it had worked at all. Well, maybe sort of, but not really. "I mean, I wouldn't blame you, if you did." He continued, confessing. "But I really hope you don't."

"I don't." Kyo stated shortly before laying his head back down on the crappy little cot. Haru offered him an odd little look, but he didn't push the matter any further. It seemed like the best way to stay on good terms with Kyo was just to not talk about anything with much significance. The cat had trouble with the actually important things. For one he didn't think they were very important, and two a little part of him was absolutely screaming at him to pay attention to what the ox was saying, and fucking pick up on how much he was hurting. But this little 'conscience-like' entity was ignored wholeheartedly and soon the red head was asleep. Haru watched him for a few more minutes, before letting out a small sigh, and shaking his head a little. Then he lay down, and decided to catch a quick nap himself--before it was time for his medication. It had just occurred to him how damn tired he was. Despite all the emotional strain, and whatnot, he really hadn't been sleeping too great. It had sort of been building up, he supposed.

***

When Haru woke up, Kyo was sitting in the very middle of the room watching the door in a detached manner. He'd gotten tired of the ceiling and had now decided to watch the very tops of people's heads go past his window. He wished they would let them have something in here but before they feared he'd do something with it, and now he had a suicide case for a roommate. So, they got nada. Haru watched him silently, for a few minutes. Just watched him sitting there.

"What time is it?" He wondered finally. There was a clock across the hall from their window, since obviously they couldn't be trusted to have one in there. The red head got gracefully to his feet and moved over closer to the little window.

"Quarter till… two." He read off the clock carefully. That was another three hours before he could eat again and another six before lights out and he slept again. What an exciting life he leads. However, that was also about two hours and fifteen minutes until Haru's medicine. He could still catch a couple hours more sleep, the ox noted, still a BIT groggy.

***

Their days were drudge filled, just like that. Sleeping, eating, sitting around, and drugs. The only time it was remotely interesting was when they finally got visitors. Nurse Agnes almost had a heart attack. She didn't want these people near her patients! But it was Hatori again! He was allowed in and he was bringing guests. Shigure and Ayame of course. Who else, really?

***

Which, honestly, surprised Haru. These really were the LAST three people he'd expected to try and come, for some reason. It was good timing, though. They'd shown up during that boring lull between the end of the afternoon sleep, and the medicine.

"Ah, hi?" The ox greeted slowly, when Agnes finally did let them in. Kyo didn't notice them too much and was staring at the ceiling again. The door got boring. So he alternated.

"Hello Haa-kun." Shigure smiled and sweat dropped a little when Ayame came over in a rustle of fabric and hugged the cat. The red head jumped a little and stared at the snake without recognition.

"Kyonkichi!" The snake crooned kissing the boy's cheek. At least Kyo wasn't kicking and screaming? Haru honestly wasn't sure if he appreciated either of these things. (Kyo reacting better to Ayame than he had to him, OR the fact that the damned snake was kissing HIS boyfriend to begin with.)

"Ayame!" Haru called sharply, after a moment of this. "Don't scare him." Aaya pouted in the ox's direction and released the cat after an enforcing look from Hatori. The red head on the other hand blinked cluelessly at Shigure and Ayame. He recognized Hatori just fine.

"Hello, Kyo-kun." The dog called cheerfully, despite that. "We've come to pay a visit and see how the two of you are fairing."

"Well enough, relatively speaking." Haru answered his question. Or, at least that was how HE felt. The drugs still weren't working too great, but he'd sort of stopped expecting them to, actually. Hatori nodded, apparently pleased to hear that. The fact that Haru had been sobbing and pleading for various methods of suicide last time he'd seen him made this a pretty major improvement.

"How have they been treating you, Kyonkichi?" Ayame wondered, petting the cat's head.

"Fine?" Kyo chirped out softly, still relatively confused. Well, despite Ayame and Shigure's apparent oblivion to the fact that Kyo didn't have a fucking clue who they were, Haru still noticed. He wasn't sure whether Hatori had or not, he wasn't making any sign of it, if he had. Other than the slightly odd look the dragon was currently tossing Kyo's way.

"Kyo." Haru spoke up finally. "You remember Ayame and Shigure, right?" He really didn't think that any substitutes for Shigure's name would have QUITE the same impact.

Kyo blinked at the aforementioned people for a moment. "Oh!" His eyes strayed back to Ayame's gold ones. He sort of remembered now, after having who they were pointed out to him. "Uhm---yes, now I do."

"Oh, poor Kyonkichi!" The snake pouted. "Such a crime that you would forget me even for a moment."

"No one can forget you, Aaya." Shigure snorted.

"Hatsuharu," Hatori spoke up at last. "Are YOU feeling any better?" He wanted to know, and Haru could tell he was concerned, even if he wasn't being too blatant about it.

"Not really." Haru shrugged honestly. "Not that big a deal, though."

"Hatsuharu--" Hatori started to admonish him, but the ox cut him off pointedly.

"It's fine, Tori-nii."

Shigure raised an interested eyebrow, but figured he could simply pester the answers out of Hatori later. The rest of the time the trio held a conversation with Haru. Kyo was mostly silent, since he didn't really feel he knew these people all that well.

Then Susanne and Agnes appeared.

"I do hate to interrupt," Susanne, who was much sweeter than Agnes, said. "But it's time for Hatsuharu's medicine." Whereas, Agnes just plain out shooed them out. Ayame gave Kyo one more tearfully dramatic hug before Shigure and Hatori pulled him out of the room.

***

Hatori blinked a little, when Shigure started with that pestering thing. He didn't have to pester for long, though. The dragon just shrugged and answered his question.

"Obsessive behavior, suicidal depression, and Akito told me he had a nervous breakdown." He listed off thoughtfully. "In short, there's a reason he's in there."

"Sounds like he's crazier than Kyo-kun." The dog snorted a little.

"Quite possibly." Hatori agreed. "If you factor in the schizophrenia, on top of it. But, I have a feeling most of it will calm, once his stress level goes down."

"Oh?" The writer blinked at him. "You think that'll happen while he's rooming with Kyo, who can just barely remember who we are?"

"No." Hatori shook his head. "I don't. But, one of them will have to get out of there eventually. It will calm down then."

"Hmm," Shigure mused absently. "Whatever you say, Haa-san."

"You disagree?" The doctor raised an eyebrow at his friend.

"That just might take a while." The dog shrugged.

"I'm aware of that." Hatori nodded. "I just can't think of anything else that might work, besides separating them. Of course, you'll also have to factor in any time it takes Hatsuharu to get over the initial separation."

"I don't think Haa-kun would stand for being separated from Kyo-kun."

"Most likely not." He agreed. "It was being separated from him that brought on all the problems that got him in there to begin with."

"Really is too bad for them." Shigure snorted.

"Oh, Gure-san! Your sympathy is overwhelming." Aaya cut in and leaned on the dogs shoulder with a small smirk.

"I'm sure it'll work out." Hatori shrugged eventually, as they reached the car. "It's not like they'll give him anything he can hurt himself with, in there."

"Yes. The wonders of an asylum." The dog laughed softly. Well, that'd been an interesting visit.

***

Interesting was one way to put it. Haru, personally, was currently brooding over it. He was annoyed that Hatori had brought up the reason he was in there, even though he knew he was just worried, it was still annoying. Kyo crawled over next to him with an odd look. The two of them still didn't talk much. Unless of course, Kyo had something to ask. Like right now.

"How do we know them?" He blinked helplessly. He remembered Shigure a bit more clearly than Ayame. But most of the memories about them had been deemed unimportant and dumped.

"Related." Haru replied simply, before elaborating. "They're part of the Juunishi, too." He added, they were alone again, anyway. It didn't take long to give out the medicine. "Tori-nii's the dragon, Ayame's the snake, and Sensei's the dog."

"Okay." Kitty nodded thoughtfully before going back to his bed to resume his interrupted ceiling staring.

"Kyo?" Haru blinked over at him, it was his turn to ask a question. It had been a while since he'd brought up anything significant. It was probably safe to try. "Are we--okay? As in--still together?" The cat's red eyes flickered over to him idly. That was a dumb question. They were always together. They shared a room! (Even though that hadn't been what Haru had been talking about at all.) So, Haru didn't feel the need to elaborate, and just lay there in his bed--where he still was from his nap earlier--waiting for Kyo to answer him.

"I guess." the cat finally mumbled, leaning back against the wall. He wasn't exactly sure what Haru was talking about, but that seemed to be the correct answer. Haru let out a small sigh, and even smaller smile. It was still there, though. He was so relieved to hear that.

"I love you, Koneko-chan." He informed him, one more time. As usual, the red head disregarded that and began pondering just how long it was before they'd be allowed to go eat. Not too long, as it turned out. Haru's medicine was about an hour before dinner, so they got to wait that out, before going to do that. Maybe they would have another visitor soon, Haru noted idly, once they were back in their room, to wait for lights out. Maybe one that wouldn't pry quite so much…

***

His wish was granted too. For even though it was a while later, their next visitors were really just coming to visit. Kisa and Momiji are good like that. Hiro really hadn't wanted to come, and in all honesty, Kyo and Haru didn't want to see him. It was hard for the two kids to get in though. But some very effective puppy eyes and Agnes just sighed and led them back to Haru and Kyo's room. Haru was a bit less surprised to see these two. But, it still gave him a little spark of cheer that they'd come, anyway.

"Hey." He greeted, when they were let inside, accepting and returning hugs from both of them. "How'd you manage to make it back here?"

"We asked real nice." The bunny beamed.

"Huh?" The ox raised his eyebrows, and nodded a bit. He was impressed, honestly. Agnes was usually the one manning the receptionist desk; he hadn't thought she'd be soft enough to let someone in just because they said please.

"And we had Ha'ri write us a note." The blonde added with a small giggle.

"Ah hah." And he'd been right, too.

"Are you two all right here?" Kisa wanted to know, sitting down carefully on the edge of Haru's bed.

"Yeah." Haru confirmed with a small smile at her. He didn't elaborate though. Didn't really need to.

"Good!' Momiji chirped. "Oh! And we brought you a present." He smiled triumphantly as he rummaged through his cute backpack for it. "Shii-chan said you guys needed cheering up. So, we brought candy!" After hearing that, Kyo blinked at his cousin oddly. He actually recognized Kisa and Momiji, but the fact that they'd brought candy into an insane asylum struck him oddly.

It confused Haru, too. "They let you bring sugar in here?" The ox raised an eyebrow at them, disbelievingly.

"Of course!" The blonde nodded vigorously. Actually, they hadn't asked. He handed over one of the little treats to Kyo who looked at it, then over questioningly at Haru. Were they even allowed to eat this? Agnes might have a fucking heart attack if she knew. Haru gave Kyo a small, helpless shrug, when he caught the look. He didn't know! Kyo was more familiar with the rules in this place than he was.

"Go on, go on." Momiji urged with a smile, and then stuck out his tongue. "We won't tell." He promised. The cat sighed under his prodding and just put it in his mouth. Sugar... When was the last time he'd had something sugary like that? He was silent as he sorted through his fucked up memories, trying to remember.

"Are you sure that was a good idea?" Haru wondered to anyone in the room, in general. Kyo had had a relatively natural diet, even before all the crap with Akito. Haru couldn't remember having ever seen him eating straight candy.

"Thank you, Momiji." Kyo smiled gently after a moment. He could sort of remember the last time. He was pretty sure Haru had been there. Maybe they were getting ice cream. That part he wasn't sure about. Haru just sighed helplessly. Maybe he was being paranoid, and the sugar would be good for Kyo. Maybe? The rabbit was just happy to feline liked it. But when he offered more the cat shook his head carefully. "It's not good for me." He giggled quietly. "And you should hide that in your bag again before the nurses come back." Yeah, they didn't want to get in trouble. Haru prodded the cushioned wall experimentally, as though testing how much padding it would offer, should Kyo quite literally start bouncing off the walls, for whatever reason.

It wasn't that bad though. He was a little more talkative, but he hadn't had so much sugar as to get him on a sugar high. If he'd done that, the nurses would have gotten mad. Actually, Haru appreciated the talkative nature, slightly. Especially since Kyo wasn't saying anything that would imply he was angry, for the moment, at least. It made the ox feel a little better. As thought, he hadn't completely screwed himself over.

Then the little ones had to leave. Kyo hugged them both happily and thanked them for coming. The visit with Kisa and Momiji had been nicer, since Kyo actually remembered who they were. Haru had enjoyed it more, too. But, that was only because they hadn't asked how he was. Normally, he enjoyed talking with Hatori and Shigure, too. But, in the mean time, he had one question for Kyo.

"Did you have fun?"

The cat looked wistfully at the door before answering. "Uh-huh."

"You don't like being in here, do you?"

"No." The red head answered absently. Now slightly absorbed into the door watching.

"Do you know if they're going to let you out?" He was honestly curious. He wanted to know when Kyo would be allowed to go home--if ever.

"I don't know."

"Oh." He let it drop, after that. And, he didn't bring up anything too heavy for the rest of the evening. He honestly wasn't in the mood to push his luck with his boyfriend, at the moment.

***

It was only two days later this time, before their next visitor came. He'd heard from the previous visitors that the two were doing all right, but he wanted to see for himself. He was actually allowed in too, without a note from Hatori. When he came in Agnes and Haru blinked as Kyo practically flew across the room to hug him.

"Shishou!" He purred happily.

"Hi, Shihan." Haru greeted, once he'd gotten over the initial shock of their master showing up in the asylum to visit.

"Hello, Kyo, and Hatsuharu." The man greeted softly as he hugged his 'son' back. "I heard from Shigure-kun that you two were doing all right. But I wanted to see for myself."

Haru felt like he was intruding on them, actually. But it wasn't like he could DO anything about it. So, he just kind of sat there. He hadn't seen his teacher in a long time. Since before Akito had his field day. There hadn't really been any point to try and go to the dojo, if he couldn't fight, after all. After a few more moments Kazuma set Kyo back down on the ground, since he'd had a paternal moment and sort of picked him up.

"I missed you, Shishou." The red head admitted sadly.

"I missed you too, Kyo." His father promised ruffling his hair gently. "How are you getting along here?"

"I'd rather go home." Kyo pouted just a little, and it melted the poor man's heart. He would really like to take Kyo home with him, rather than leave him in this place. And, by all practical purposes, he could. As Kyo's guardian, Kazuma DID have the legal power to check him out of the asylum, right then. Haru knew that, too. He'd read a little, before he'd gone to visit Kyo that first time. And, with that knowledge, the ox felt a small pang of panic in his stomach at the sympathetic look on Kazuma's face. He didn't want to be left alone, here. There was one flaw in that worry. Kazuma hugged Kyo again sadly.

"I'm sorry I can't bring you home, Kyo. Akito would never let me." He rested his cheek on the flame colored hair and sighed. "But, if you get better they'll have no choice but to let you go. Even Akito doesn't have a say in that." He straightened up, feeling far too emotional for a man like himself to be feeling. "You've been getting better right? Eating?"

"Yes, Shishou." The pretty kitty nodded.

"Good, there, you see. It shouldn't be too long." Kazuma smiled tenderly for his son.

Well, that didn't exactly fix that fear of Haru's. Not too long, indeed. The ox didn't even know what was wrong with himself, let alone how to fix it. Kyo was getting better--he WAS better, it was just a matter of staying that way, now. He would recover and go home soon. Now, not to get him wrong. Haru wanted Kyo to get better and go home--more than anything. But, he hadn't liked being alone here, while Kyo had been in solitary. And that had only been for a few days.

Kazuma stayed for a while and talked to them both. It made Kyo really happy, and he was honestly close to tears when those horrible nurses told Kazuma it was his time to go.

"I'll come see you again, all right, Kyo?" The man promised petting his head.

"Okay." The younger Sohma sighed despondently before latching his arms around the others neck once more, then allowing him to leave.

***

"I bet you liked seeing Shihan." Haru spoke up finally, once the medicine was administered and the nurses gone.

"Yeah," Kyo smiled happily over at the ox.

"Maybe he'll come again." Actually, Haru was pretty sure he would, but his mind wasn't really on the conversation. He was just talking to keep Kyo from somehow knowing what he was thinking about. Which was, at the moment, devising a way to make sure he didn't do anything stupid, like mention his not-so-new anxiety to ANYONE. Even that useless therapist of his. He didn't NEED to talk it out; he knew how to deal with it. Plus, the last thing he'd brought up that had been this big, had been on the day he'd been committed there--and look at all the good that had done.

***

Then their next visitor. Neither of them actually WANTED to see him, but for some strange reason he came anyways. Yuki. Like Momiji and Kisa he had to ask Hatori to get him permission to get in, but he still came.

Kyo was asleep when he showed up. That didn't really matter to the rat though; he'd come to see Haru.

Haru was actually awake, though. Lying on his back, counting the little flaws in the wall, but he was awake. He'd thought it was early for his medicine, and they'd already had lunch, so he tossed the door and interested look, and his eyes widened slightly, when he saw who it was.

"Yuki…" He murmured quietly, so as to not wake Kyo up.

"Hello, Haru." The rat replied and came across the room to sit on the edge of the other's bed.

"What are you--? Why are you--?" He stammered for a few minutes, before just sighing. "Hi."

"I came to see you." Yuki blinked, he thought that was fairly obvious.

"Well, yeah, okay," Haru nodded, having got his composure back. "...Hi." He repeated, not really having a hell of a lot to say, at the moment. Which was fine with Yuki. He wasn't really here to talk. He was about to do something very physical and very selfish to Haru, but he woke Kyo up by accident. He cursed to himself when the cat sat up yawning then stared at him.

"What are you doing here?" He frowned.

"I came to see Haru." The rat answered icily, removing his hand from where it had been on the ox. "I am allowed."

"Oh, now you care about him?" They were ignoring the younger boy in favor of their own conversation.

"I always have."

"You show it so well." Kyo laughed.

"Look cat. If you'd just listened to me the first time, none of it would have happened."

Kyo was looking and sounding like his old self throughout this, and now he growled deeply and stood up. "Fuck you rat boy. Why don't you just go to hell?"

"Touchy, touchy, Kyo." Yuki snorted. Also getting up and looking smugly at the other.

That's when Kyo got his punch in. Square in Yuki's face and it went from there until Mr. Rick appeared and pulled them apart. It was good that it was him rather than one of the nurses. Either way, Yuki was asked to leave, Kyo sedated and sent off to solitary once more, and Haru left rather bewildered.

"Don't take him away!" Said bewildered ox protested, as Rick started to take Kyo off. "He'll be fine now! They never got along."

"Sorry, kiddo. It's the rules. I'll talk to Agnes though and get it cut down to just one day." The man promised. He was a fairly reasonable guy, after all.

"Promise?" Haru frowned after him.

Mr. Rick nodded sympathetically. "Yeah." Then he hefted Kyo once more and they set out. Haru frowned at the door for a few more minutes, before it occurred to him, fully. Kyo had been acting like himself. His old self, before all this crap had started. Maybe Hatori was wrong, and there WAS hope to fix him?

***

As promised, Kyo came back one day later, and it was in a sulky silence. After entering the room he just went and flopped listlessly on the bed and glared at the innocent ceiling. That fucking Yuki!

"Are you alright?" Haru wanted to know, moving over to Kyo. He'd been counting on Rick to keep his promise, and had just stayed in his chair after his therapy session, so that he COULD move when Kyo came back.

The cat's eyes narrowed a little in agitation. "Yeah." He murmured. Haru let out a small, relieved sigh, and smile. Not too large of one, but it was noticeable this time. His Kyo had come back, even if he didn't stay, he'd still come back. It gave him a little hope that eventually he might stay. The older looked over at him for a moment before sitting up with an odd look on his face and crawling over toward the edge of the bed to look at Haru, eye to eye.

"I hate him." He stated very plainly.

"I know." Haru nodded matter-of-factly. "It's not exactly anything new."

Kyo growled and his scowl momentarily fell on the poor innocent floor. "He's blaming everything on me, the bastard."

"Don't listen to him." Haru shrugged. "I don't think it's your fault at all."

"He thinks it is, since I didn't listen to the little bitch when he told me to just stay the hell away from you." Kyo spit irritably.

"Since when do you care what Yuki thinks?" The ox raised an eyebrow at him. "No one else is going to pay attention."

"Cause he thinks he still has some claim on you!" the red head snorted. "It pisses me off!" He crawled forward into Haru's lap and hugged him possessively. It was his Haru! NOT Yuki's!

"Why?" Haru wondered finally, staring almost contentedly at the blanket on Kyo's bed. "Last time I tried to touch you, you threw a fucking fit."

"Because I apparently just hurt you so damn much." The cat huffed. "I'm not stupid. I know you just felt guilty after saying that. So I purposely got solitary so you could get over it. But it didn't work. Stubborn bastard."

"That's not true, Kyo." Haru stated softly. "I mean, yeah, I felt bad. But, I didn't tell you I loved you BECAUSE I felt bad. I felt bad because I loved you, and acted like an asshole and said all that crap anyway."

"Bull," The red head looked away moodily.

"Would you stop that?" The ox pleaded desperately. "All I want is for you to be fucking safe an happy! You weren't either! Yes, it hurts to watch you go through that and not be able to do a damn thing to stop it!"

"And you're helping so much with your suicide and--and---" Kyo frowned.

"Don't bother flattering yourself, by thinking that was all your fault." Haru suggested darkly.

Kyo growled and left the ox to stalk over towards the door. "That's not what I said you stupid son of a bitch." He grumbled under his breath.

"Whatever." Haru rolled his eyes a bit. "I don't know why I bothered to try, anyway. All I know is there's a bunch of crap going on right now, and I don't fucking know how to handle any of it."

***

Yeah things were about that pleasant from then on. Which is not very pleasant at all. The main problem being: Kazuma had been right. Kyo behaved from then on. Until Kazuma asked for them to look at him and judge if he was ready to leave and he was. He occasionally had some lapses of personality, but they were minor.

So, Kazuma was waiting out in the main lobby and Kyo was contemplating saying goodbye to Haru. He decided to and walked back to the room and opened the door carefully, staying near it so he didn't get locked inside.

"You're going home today?" Haru assumed, offering him a small, odd look. Oh WOW. He was going to throw up. He was going to fucking throw up! Damnit!

"Yeah," Kyo nodded stiffly.

"Good." Haru nodded, practiced calm hiding his panic. "I--don't want to see you here--ever again."

"I'm glad." The cat smiled softly. "I didn't plan on coming back."

"Good." The ox repeated, staring willfully down into his own lap, just begging himself not to start crying again. "I'm going to miss you, though."

"Come here, Haru." The red head requested gently. The ox obeyed, and tried to ignore the slight shaking in his hands, as he moved them from his lap to push on the wheels. Upon arriving across the room, Haru looked up at Kyo, almost defiantly even though he could feel the tears coating his eyes. He was still determined not to let them fall, though. Not until Kyo left, anyway.

"What?"

Kyo crouched down in front of him and leaned forward pressing one short kiss on him before standing back up.

"Buh-bye." He smiled.

"Damnit!" Haru muttered in what was supposed to be an annoyed tone. "You're making me act like a little girl!" He informed Kyo, before tugging him back down, to offer up his own (albeit wet) farewell offering.

"You always act like a little girl, Haru." The red head teased him in a soft breathy voice.

"And a good seventy percent of that's your fault." Haru nodded, letting his forehead rest against Kyo's chest, unwilling to be left alone JUST yet.

"Oh, forgive me." Kyo rolled his eyes.

"I really feel like I should hate you, right now." Haru admitted, closing his eyes to try and make his stupid crying stop. "But I don't."

"You should. Please do."

"I can't." Haru mumbled shaking his head. "I love you too much to hate you." He looked up at Kyo, not even caring that he was crying, at this point. "You're MY kitten, and I will NOT give you up."

Kyo snogged him a good one before shaking his head sadly and stepping a little ways into the hall.

"Sorry to hear that. Cause I have to go. You get better get the hell out of here soon, I'll be waiting for you.”

"K--Kyo..." Haru started, catching the door before it could shut. "Do you believe me now?"

"Yeah." The red head nodded.

End

A/N: This is a suspiciously open ending…