Gundam Wing Fan Fiction / Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ Isolated Rain ❯ Intersection #02 - Sweet Pain ( Chapter 2 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

You still desire to haunt me, November rain? Setsuna thought to herself as she looked out the window of her apartment in Tokyo, amusement clearly in her contemplations. A vase filled with a dozen garnet red roses, the drops of rain still fresh on them, was on her windowsill. A red ribbon was tied around it, a small card planted inside it. In the deepest, perfect cursive Setsuna had ever seen was her name, embroided with an ivory lace around it and gold glitter that sparkled in the light and in the darkness. She smiled, looking at the gift that was sent to her today from Heero. It had been only twenty-four hours since her conversation with Heero to his apartment in the southern part of Tokyo.

The conversation was interesting as Heero talked of his past missions, the doctor that raised him, a man known as Odin Lowe that found him, and the comrades that he befriended in the time of warfare. She could still remember the order that Heero had put them in -- Duo Maxwell, an laid-back, dedicated American, Chang Wufei, a chavenistic, proud Chinese, Quatre Raberba Winner, a polite, charming Arabian, and Trowa Barton, a silent, nonchalant, and wise advisor of all the pilots. All tattered by the war, all having different stories to tell, and all of them keeping in touch. All of them -- except Heero Yuy.

She smiled, remembering exactly what happened in that conversation.

"You never utter a word to them about your well-being?" she asked, completely flabbergasted that such a man wouldn't even talk to his friends that she knew he cared for.

"They have lives, they have a family, they have someone to come home to," he said, looking at Setsuna with his intense prussian blue eyes. "I don't have anyone. I'm still that wandering soldier waiting for orders."

"You do, you have your friends," Setsuna stated, no emotions in her voice. Her garnet eyes held the same intensity that Heero had in his own eyes. Moments later, a condensending smile formed on Heero's lips, making Setsuna raise her eyebrows on his sudden outburst of thought and emotion.

"Who said I wasn't watching over them?" he asked, completely amused by Setsuna's look.

Forgiveness glazed over her garnet eyes as she said, "I just assumed--"

"-- yeah, assumption by proclimation. It's alright, it's human nature, Setsuna-chan," he mused, a glint of mirth twinkling on the outskirts of his eyes. "We all can't hide from our natural instincts."

"You can," she whispered, almost regretting what she said.

"Because I was trained to," he whispered back, his eyes still glittering with mirth like no other. "After all, you said it yourself, I am a fascination."

"Can I take that back, I have a different word in mind now," Setsuna joked, a chuckle threatening to release.

"Let me think about that--no," he said quickly, creating that stiffled chuckle to release from her mouth.

The same chuckle from before came through her vocal cords once again, closing her eyes as if she was trying to carve that conversation in her memory. Heero, the word whispered in her mind, creating an illuminating echo that would haunt her just like the November rain did. However, just as quickly as the smile had gone on her face did it fade away like a horrible nightmare that followed her wherever she went. She knew what was happening to her. Setsuna couldn't let it happen. Not to a person like Heero. He had so much to live for, he didn't need to know about her curse.

Goddess, how she wanted to live. To be free from his deathly curse called immortality. If she would bond, or even befriend the young adult of only twenty years, she would hurt him so much. Setsuna knew she would have to be called back of anything wrong happened in the past, or even the future for that matter. Intimacy was not her friend, even if she longed for a companion to talk to. To hold and to cherish. Someone she could call her own, someone she could just love for the rest of her forsaken immortal life. She refused to put Heero through it. She refused to let him know who she was. She refused to let him understand what immortality was like. She didn't want to add so much torture to his already agonized life. They would just be acquaintences, maybe even friends. But that's how far she would have it.

Gomen nasai, Heero-san, she thought, still looking at the card held by the red ribbon, her hands inching to open it. Demo, I have to protect you... from me. I'll still be you friend, though. Always your friend... even if we share the same lonliness. Sighing, she ran a hand through her raven black hair, her eyes wandering from the vase to the wooden clock on her mantlepiece which set neatly over the small fireplace that came with the apartment. The two little hands read 3:32, making Setsuna sigh. Great, The Jazz Messangers closes at 3:30 today. And I wanted another cafe latté, Setsuna thought, pouting slightly. Disregarding whatever she had on her mind, Setsuna decided that a night out in the town would be best for her. Maybe seeing a movie or an opera or a theatrical performance -- whatever it was, just something that could loosen her mind up from everything around her.

Deciding to go to the Tokyo Dome and see if anything was playing, Setsuna grabbed her overcoat, the same that she wore when she met Heero. Thinking about Heero again, Setsuna's eyes clouded over, remembering the conversation she had when they were walking together in the rain. Opening the door to her apartment and locking it behind her, Setsuna replayed back the part of the conversation when she immediately tensed up after Heero asked her that fateful question and the last words that haunted her mind like a broken record.

"What's wrong Setsuna-chan?" he whispered, though no emotions ran through, worry read clearly in his prussian blue eyes.

"Gomen," she whispered back, then adding as if everything was normal, "I just zoned out there for a moment. What did you say again, Heero-san?"

"I asked about your past, Setsuna. I told you things about me, why not things about you?" he asked.

A grim look was plastered on her face, her garnet eyes clouded with such misery and despair, as she answered in a mistful tone, "To speak about my past is reading through a million history books. Time is too short for mortal hands. You would die before knowing the entire truth."

"It hasn't stopped me before," Heero stated.

"When it comes to me, it will," she stated grimly, her gaze moving from Heero to the murky clouds above.

A silence grimmed over as Heero's apartment was in their sights. Side by side they walked together, only the defiancy of the raindrops falling around them the only sound emitting in the hush. She glanced over to Heero, his prussian blue eyes locked up from all emotions once again. She sighed, knowing she lost the open windows of his soul. They were clouded over, and gone were the sparkles of life she once saw. Without konwing it, they were at the front door of his apartment.

"Well, sayo--"

Before she could finish, he faced Setsuna eye to eye while whispering, "A past can be hidden forever, but the ghosts riding within will never waver. Remember that, Setsuna-chan."

With that, he opened the door, and closed it behind him.

Deep in thought from the conversation of beforehand, Setsuna hailed for a taxi with her garnet red leather gloved right hand. A yellow taxi cab quickly parked on the side of the curb as Setsuna opened the door and slided inside, sitting on the plush leather seats. She closed the door behind her, settling into her seat. Her garnet eyes looked at the license on the right, which had the driver's picture and his name in bold letters, "Louis D. Romero." Judging by the last name, her driver must have been of Spanish decent. Sure enough, when she looked up, she saw a forty year old man with copper skin, slick blackish brown hair, and a mustache. He had a blue baseball cap on his head as he turned the corner of her street, and heading towards the freeway.

His jovial green eyes looked in the rear view mirror, locking with Setsuna's garnet red eyes. Seeing him smile slightly, he asked with a thick Spanish accent, "Where are you going, senorita?"

"Tokyo Dome," she answered bluntly.

"Alright," he answered quickly, heading onto the freeway towards the Tokyo Dome.

Setsuna gazed out her window, her eyes clouding over as she thought about Heero. If you only knew, she thought, watching the rain patter on her windowsill. The rain looks like his eyes, she thought as a condesending smile reached to her face. However, she quickly wiped it away with the sudden thought of, What the hell did I just think? Was she falling in love with him? A total stranger? Maybe not total because of the long conversation they had. But still. Love? To her, Heero was a friend, an acquaintance, nothing more. She knew his past... damn. She was the stranger, the uninvited guest. He knew nothing about her. Absolutely nothing.

Was this what she wanted? Did she want to be alone forever? What she truely wanted for herself... and for him? Kami-sama, she thought, resting her face into her hands. She didn't know. She needed him to stay away, to make sure he was never hurt. To her him -- that was worse than any agony. Immortality, eternal awakening, incarnation, all of them combined. To her a poor, innocent soul like Heero's was worse than anything she could imagine. Sighing, she laid her head back, the garnet orbs that lit up her face still clouded like a downcast of azure rain.

I didn't even read his card, she thought, closing her eyes.

I can't read his card, she thought again, as a tear cascaded down her face.

And I won't read his card, she thought as the tear stayed, similar to the dewdrops on the roses.

And as the taxi raced down the highway, she whispered outloud so that only herself could regard her words.


"But I love him so much, I will never hurt him, as long as I shall live."